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Arthur was on the ground in a daze.
Though Gwaine had managed to land a blow to his chest - if Arthur were thinking clearly, he would refer to it as lucky - it wasn’t the wind being knocked out of him that had him so incoherent.
His brain was still focused on this morning. It was really the only thing he could focus on for the entire day.
How could he have let it happen?
How could he have let -
“You having a lovely nap, princess?”
A deep groan came from Arthur as Gwaine’s smug, grinning face loomed over him.
When Gwaine held out his hand, Arthur rolled his eyes and jumped to his feet. He’s suffered enough indignities for the day without having to be helped up by the likes of Gwaine.
As Arthur dusted himself off, he glanced up at Gwaine. “I’m fairly certain, I’ve told you numerous times already to stop calling me that. It’s not even accurate anymore.”
“I know.” Gwaine ran both hands through his hair, brushing his brown locks away from his face. “But, calling you ‘your highness’ isn’t as much fun.”
“And your fun is certainly what I live for.” Arthur picked up his sword and started to walk away.
“Today’s definitely been fun.” Gwaine followed him. “I can’t remember the last time you’ve gone down that hard. It didn’t seem like you were very focused today.”
“You just got lucky. It won’t happen again.” Arthur looked around. “Where’s Leon?”
Gwaine’s brow furrowed. “How do you not remember? You sent him, Elyan, and a few of the other knights to -”
“Search for the bandit. Of course.” Arthur nodded.
There had been a thief robbing many residents of the lower town.
Arthur rubbed at his forehead. He needed to get his head back to now instead of constantly being stuck on recent events.
“Why do you need him? Can I be of assistance?”
They arrived at the armory.
When he looked over at him, to his surprise, mixed with Gwaine’s usual smirk, was a look of genuine concern. Arthur tried to shrug it off.
“That’s highly doubtful. I’ll just wait for Leon.” He fiddled with his gloves.
“Or Merlin?”
“Merlin? Why Merlin? Why would you bring up Merlin?” He spat out in rapid succession. His eyes widened. “Is he here?”
“No.” Gwaine wrinkled his nose as he watched Arthur scan the armory with his eyes. “You are definitely off today, Princess? Did something happen with Merlin?”
Arthur almost literally but his tongue.
“Did Merlin finally tell you where to shove it after you pushed him too far, yet again?” Gwaine grinned. “I can imagine that would be quite a shock for you. Unless…”
“Unless what?”
“Unless you two finally gave in to your burning desire for each other and finally made use of that huge bed of yours?”
A squawk resembling an injured bird flew out of Arthur’s mouth. He cornered Gwaine against the wall.
“What would make you even think to suggest something like that?”
His breathing was labored. It was almost sure he was sweating more than he ever had in his life.
Gwaine’s mouth fell open.
“You didn’t?”
“I didn’t.” Arthur vehemently shook his head.
A wide grin started to grow on Gwaine’s face annoyingly. “You did!”
“I didn’t.” He swallowed. “We didn’t.” Arthur put his head in his hands.
He felt Gwaine’s hand on his shoulder. “Arthur?”
For some strange reason, Gwaine calling him by his name was what broke down Arthur’s walls.
Slowly, he picked his head up. He let out a deep sigh.
“We didn’t…not exactly.”
~*~
It had started out as any regular morning. Well, normal for him and Merlin. He had to drag Arthur out of bed literally.
Usually, by this point, Arthur would usually start to come to life gradually, but he had been having a more challenging time that morning - and he didn’t know why. While he had dreams - dreams he couldn’t remember - his sleep hadn’t been fitful.
As Merlin prattled on about his duties for the day - endless duties - Arthur let out a giant yawn. It was then that Merlin stuck a pastry in his mouth. Arthur only began to chew it to clear his mouth so he could give Merlin a good tongue lashing, but then he noticed the unusual taste. He quite liked it.
“What is this?”
“I know apples are your favorite, so I asked the cook to bake it into your bread this morning.” Merlin stepped closer to him.
The sweetness of the gesture caught Arthur off guard. “That was really nice. Why would you do that? Especially with cook. I’m surprised you’re still standing here.”
Merlin chuckled. As he trailed off, he shrugged. “I just wanted to do something nice for you.”
At that moment, something switched in him. Arthur wasn’t sure if it was because he was still sleepy. If he was caught off guard by the tenderness of Merlin’s gesture and in his voice. Maybe he was just tired of repressing it.
Whatever the reason, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Merlin’s. Though he was still in a sleepy haze, he definitely noticed that Merlin kissed him back.
When Arthur pulled back, he knew there was a dopey grin on his face. “Thank you, love.”
“You’re welcome.” Merlin hung his head and rubbed the back of his neck. “Just don’t get used to it and finish your breakfast.”
~*~
“You kissed Merlin?” Gwaine shrieked.
Arthur looked around the room, though he was sure they were the only people in there. “Keep your voice down. And, yes.”
Gwaine let out a boisterous laugh as he clapped and stared at the ceiling. “Now, I wish Leon were here.”
“Why?”
“I always like to collect on a successful wager.” Gwaine grinned.
“You made a bet with Leon about Merlin and me?” Arthur shook his head. “Why?”
“All of us have talked about it. We’ve all wondered when you would admit your feelings for each other.”
“Feelings?” Arthur turned up his nose. “Who said anything about feelings?”
Gwaine rolled his eyes. “I told Leon I thought you would finally give in to it this year.”
“And, Leon - sensible Leon - argued that there are no feelings,” Arthur interrupted.
“No.” Gwaine shook his head. “He thought it would take more than a year.”
Arthur groaned. He walked away from him.
Gwaine raced after him.
“You’re saying there are no feelings between you?” Gwaine asked.
“N-no.” Arthur hesitated as he stopped in place. “I -”
Gwaine stepped in front of him. “What did you say after the kiss?”
After Merlin told him to finish his breakfast, Arthur smiled. “Yeah, yeah, I’ll get right on it, your highness.”
“I’ll get started on your bath.” Merlin was blushing now.
“Thank you, love you.”
“Love you, too.”
Arthur took a deep breath. “It can’t. I can’t - We’re men. It’s not natural.”
Gwaine leaned against the wall. “It feels natural to Percival and me.”
Arthur’s eyes widened.
Right at that moment, Percival walked by them. He threw a lascivious smile at Gwaine, who winked.
Initially, Arthur felt surprised, but when he thought about it, it did make sense. The way those two were together - felt natural. Just like…”
“Oh, dear. I-I do love him.”
Gwaine walked up to him and slapped him on the shoulder. “Finally figured it out.”
Arthur closed his eyes. He was feeling vulnerable and couldn’t help asking his next question. “What do I do now?”
“You have to talk to him. Talk to him, and hopefully, you get to finish that kiss.”
Gwaine’s smile was genuine and somewhat comforting when he opened his eyes.
Comforting until Arthur thought about what would come next.
Talk to Merlin?
Suddenly the thought of facing a fire-breathing dragon seemed much more appealing.
~*~
When Arthur finally made it back to his chambers after a hellish day of council meetings, Merlin was in there cleaning up. As soon as he spotted Arthur, he tripped in place and had to catch himself on the table in the middle of the room.
Arthur would have laughed at that if his stomach weren’t currently trying to claw its way out of his body.
“Merlin, uh, I’m surprised you’re here.” Arthur couldn’t think of anything else to say.
“It is part of my duties, and I take those seriously.”
They stared at each other for a beat, and then both collapsed in a fit of laughter. For a brief moment, it felt comfortable and normal again.
As he caught his breath, Arthur glanced up at a grinning Merlin, and he could feel…something…in his stomach again, and he cleared his throat. “This is awkward, isn’t it?”
“You noticed that.” Merlin shot him a slight grin before he looked down at the ground.
“Yes.” Arthur chewed on his bottom lip. “I’m not used to feeling this way. I guess it’s not really out of the ordinary for you, but for me….”
“Clotpole.” Merlin shoved his shoulder.
Arthur grinned, but it soon fell. “Merlin-”
Merlin held up his hand. “May I speak first?”
It was on the tip of his tongue to say no, but when Arthur stared into his eyes and saw how nervous - but determined - Merlin was - he simply nodded.
“I know that you kissed me, but I kissed you back. It wasn’t an accident. It’s something I’ve thought about - dreamed about - for a long time. But, despite what you might think of me sometimes, I’m not stupid. I know it might not mean the same to you. How could it? You’re you, and I’m me. How could you ever….” He sighed. “How could you ever love me the way that I love you?”
Even though he had come to the realization of his feelings this morning, it hadn’t occurred to Arthur that Merlin would feel the same. It didn’t seem likely. And, even if it had, in a million years, he would never have expected Merlin to blurt it out like that.
As he looked into his eyes, and he saw all of Merlin’s fears so apparent in those gorgeous blue eyes, all Arthur cared about was taking that fear, that pain, away.
“Perhaps, you’re right. Why would I ever feel that way about you?” He took a few steps closer. “You’re insolent, rude-”
“Those mean the same thing,” Merin said in a tiny voice.
“See.” Arthur gestured to him. He chuckled. “You can never follow the simplest of instructions. You’re stubborn.” As Arthur stopped directly in front of Merlin, he tipped up his chin. “But you’re also kind, funny, smart, loyal. You are the bravest man I’ve ever known. So, Merlin, if you're asking me, how could I love you. How could I not?”
Merlin slowly stared up at him with wide, tear-filled eyes.
“I love you with all of my heart.”
The silence stretched out between them, and the awkwardness came back. Arthur wondered if he’d broken something in Merlin when suddenly he felt a stinging pinch on his arm.
“Ow.” Arthur looked down at where Merlin had pinched him. “What was that for?”
“I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t dreaming.”
“I think it’s customary to pinch yourself when you’re trying to work that one out.” He rubbed at his arm, even though it really didn’t hurt that bad.
“I know.” A mischievous grin started to spread on Merlin’s face.
Arthur shook his head as he cradled Merlin’s face in his hands. “What am I going to do with you?”
“Kiss me…again,” Merlin whispered.
“Alright, just this once.” He leaned forward, but before their lips connected, he pulled back slightly. “Don’t think giving the orders is going to be a thing in this relationship because I’ll have you know that I am still the king, and I-”
“Arthur?” Merlin carded his fingers through his hair.
“Yes?”
“Shut up, my lord.” Merlin grinned before pulling him down for a soul-searing kiss.
A pretty good way to bookend the day, Arthur thought, as he lifted Merlin up and carried him to bed.