Work Text:
Waking Pt 2
Morse slowly comes to with a vague feeling of pain but also the feeling of floating. The last thing he remembers is being snatched from Mrs Thursday's arms and stabbed with needles by strangers.
‘Where am I? I think I hurt. Why am I flying? I don’t want to fly. I told the bird no-fly.’
He doesn’t realise he’s squeaking until he feels a gentle hand running along his face and spines accompanied by the most comforting voice he thinks he’s ever heard.
“It’s alright love. You’ll be alright. We’ve got you. No need to fret.”
‘Mum? No silly. Mum’s dead. Almost mum? …Mrs Thur…Win. She’s Win and she makes good food and gives good cuddles. Hello.’
Morse turns his squeaks to clicks as he recognises two of his favourite people.
‘And Sir too. Why are there two of you? Ha, two Sirs.’
“Welcome back lad. You gave us a bit of a fright there for a moment..”
‘I nearly got eaten. Frightened me too. Then I got kidnapped. Where am I by the way? Why do I feel funny? Am I bald!? Where did some of my spines go? I'm the hedgehog version of naked!'
“Even Jakes was concerned.”
‘LIES! Don’t lie to me.’
“We’ll make some changes pet. Make sure this never happens again.”
‘Ok. I believe you. No more big birds. Ever. Why did you stop with the fusses??’
As soon as Mrs Thursday’s finger runs softly between his eyes Morse pushes his head into the touch and feels an odd vibration running through him.
‘What’s that!? What am I doing? It feels nice. Relaxing. Am I purring? I DO purr! Are hedgehogs related to cats? My tummy hurts. I want to go home. Take me home?’
An uncomfortable car ride later and Morse is being plopped down on his quilt while Fred and Win get settled. He groggily watches them as best he can from his spot for a while until the call of nature sounds the alarm.
‘I have to pee. I don’t want to move. I should move. This quilt is squishy. Oh I really have to go! Come on Morse, pull yourself together, the door’s right over there. On three? One…two…three!...ow.’
The walk to the kitchen is not a comfortable one with Fred and Win fussing over him as soon as they spot him in the doorway.
‘Ow…ow…ow. I hurt in places I didn’t know I had. Damn bird. Damn ant. Damn it all. Ow. I just want to go pee.’
“Want to go out love?”
‘Yes please.’
“Come here then.”
‘Thank you. You’re really quite wonderful you know. It’s not easy being a hedgehog.’
The unhappy hog is content to be scooped up off the floor and chauffeured to the back door before he’s put down on the edge of the lawn where he freezes as soon as Win’s hand moves away from him.
‘Nope. Nope nope nope. Pick me back up. I feel threatened! It’s too exposed! It’s going to eat me! Pick me up, pick me up, pick me up!’
His thoughts may not get him the results he needs but his frantic, panicked squeaks certainly do with Win whisking him back inside and holding him in her arms until he calms down.
“Now what do we do?”
‘Good question. I still need to pee.’
“You’ll have to go out and get him a litter box until you can make the garden safer for him.”
‘A litter box? Like a cat litter box? Am I a pet now?’
“A litter box?”
“You know, for cats.”
‘Sounds humiliating.’
It was humiliating. Morse was hesitant to use the enclosed litter box while Fred and Win were watching expectantly.
‘Do you have to watch? I’m a grown man. The plant pot in the corner was one thing but this…this is humiliation. Seriously…stop staring…I’m gonna sit here and stare back till you turn around and put the television on. I can wait…no I can’t. What do I do? Do I bury it? At least it’s quiet.’
He must’ve looked rather pathetic as the day wore on as he kept getting regular deliveries of a fresh hot water bottle to his quilt. He isn’t sure what Fred’s been doing but there’s been a lot of noise coming from the garden.
‘Maybe he’s making an anti-bird net or a raptor trap. I hope whatever it is doesn’t ruin the flowers. Oh! Another one, thank you. Oh, that’s cosy. I don’t own one of these things. I probably should, it’s delightful. What’s he doing out there? I don’t get to know? Is it a surprise? I’m not sure I like those. This is really very cosy.’
In the end, he manages to fall asleep thanks to a mixture of heat-induced cosiness and painkillers at the end of what has been a very traumatic day for the poor hog.