Chapter Text
“Welcome Ladies and Gentlemen to Korea’s 87th annual Busan Cup here at the LetsRun racetrack!”
“Remember Yeosang, eyes forward, focus on the horse in front of you always. Don’t worry about what’s next to you.” Yunho slaps his hands on both of Yeosang’s shoulders and squeezes, “And most importantly, wait for the gap to open. Don’t rush it.”
“You done?” Yeosang laughs, looking up at him. Yunho has been Yeosang’s trainer ever since he was fourteen. Sure Yunho was only a couple of years older than him, but he still has more experience.
Before a fatal accident, it left Yunho out of the race track but it didn’t stop him from training horses. When he met Yeosang, they immediately formed a bond. Sine then, Yeosang let no one else train him.
The jockey and his trainer both work for Park Seonghwa. Ever since his father died, Seonghwa took over the ranch where he raises the best and finest racehorses in the country. But as rich and put together he is, he only relies on one jockey to ride his best horses, and that is his cousin Kang Yeosang.
The two weren’t necessarily close since childhood, but ever since Yeosang’s uncle died, his family were the only people who ever looked after Seonghwa at a young age.
Yeosang watches Seonghwa approach him and stops in his tracks. He’s wearing a purple velvet suit and his hair is slicked back. This is his business side of him. They’re face to face. “Seventeen to one odds,” he says looking down at the jockey.
Yeosang nods.
Seonghwa continues. “The competition is tough.”
Yeosang nods again. “I saw the list a week ago.”
Seonghwa takes a deep breath and lets himself relax. He puts his hand on Yeosang’s head and ruffles his hair before handing him his horse crop. “They say it’s going to rain in the next ten minutes,” he sighs looking up at the clouds. “Just win this one, okay?”
Before Yeosang could reply, they hear a slow clap from behind making the three of them turn their attention to the sound.
Hongjoong, known to be Seonghwa’s rival, was leaning on a wall dressed in his red velvet suit that was almost identical to Seonghwa’s.
“That’s cute Park,” he pushes himself off the wall and walks up to Seonghwa. A crutch was rested underneath his armpit that supported Hongjoong as he walked. Hongjoong was a star jockey back in the day. After an accident in a race after the Kentucky Derby, he was left severely injured that took away his capability to walk normal again. The man stood before them. “Don’t forget your loss to my horse last year.”
Seonghwa scoffs, turning his head to the side and clenching his jaw. “Oh please Kim, don’t get cocky. My horse has more stamina than yours will ever dream of. Have fun losing in the final stretch.”
Yeosang stood back with Yunho, the two of them clearly entertained by the tension the two horse owners have.
Ever since Yeosang started his jockey career with his cousin, Hongjoong has always been up his ass about who will win more money. But it wasn’t always about who wins the big bucks. The two always show up to races trying to out-dress each other, or who can draw in more ladies from the wealthier side.
The bugle sound was heard throughout the race track, meaning the competition will start soon. First call.
San, the stableboy who works for Seonghwa, came jogging up with a smile plastered on his face. “I got Wind Anthem all saddled up,” he said to Yeosang, dimples on full display. “Go get your silks on, and we’ll be ready for you near the entrance.”
Yeosang smiles at San and thanks him before heading to the jockey room. He looked back at the others and saw them heading to their seats which were near the front row. He took a deep breath and continued on.
In the jockey’s room, Yeosang thinks only of Wind Anthem. He looks up at the colors of Hongjoong’s jockey. Beomgyu, a previous Busan winner on his old horse, would be wearing a white cap.
He tears his eyes away from the young boy and straps on his helmet. He heads out with the others jockeys and the roaring of the crowd begins.
Yeosang makes his way through the other horses until he sees San and Wind Anthem waiting for him. His horse was dressed in purple, the colors of Seonghwa’s ranch and also the colors matching Yeosang’s silks.
“All I need is luck,” Yeosang says to himself as he climbs onto Wind Anthem with a leg up from San. “You’ll do the rest girl.”
It’s a muddy race, the kind that Yeosang relishes on some horses and dreads on others. He likes the way the mud kicks up, the humidity in the air, though like every other owner and trainer and jockey, hates the soft track. He’s racing Wind Anthem, a decent mudder, and he’s glad for the solid assignment.
He pet her mane as the other horses were being rallied up into the starting gate. Wind Anthem was the first horse he’s truly felt connected to. He remembers around three years ago when she was fresh out of her mother’s womb, she immediately got up with her long wobbly legs and stumbled to Yeosang. He remembered how big and curious her eyes were, and when Yeosang looked into them he knew she was going to be his racehorse. Seonghwa obviously agreed to this. So now here he is, about to take Wind Anthem on her 30th race in his hometown.
The bell rings in Yeosang’s ears and he feels Wind Anthem drop and push beneath him, hammering the track and powering forward. There comes the rushing sound of seventy-five thousand voices and the tumbling motion of horses and the flight of wind and mud and the airy unreal reeling of mass and gravity slipping away.
They roll down the homestretch for the first time and Yeosang feels Wind Anthem’s stride, smooth and strumming. Beomgyu, on Anti-Romantic, has the lead, and Yeosang lets his horse go. They bent together through the first turn. An open lane stretches ahead of them, a perfect spot to race.
As the field leans around the far turn at the Let’sRun racetrack, Yeosang once again finds himself just to the back of Beomgyu. Beomgyu is bent over the back of Anti-Romantic, racing along the rail. Yeosang is caught in the veritable whirlwind of horses. Slow Dancer, an American horse, is practically on Yeosang’s tale. Just inches ahead of Beomgyu, a length ahead of Valkyrie, an Italian racehorse, is Javier on Jo. A horse that Yeosang only knows for side-swiping a jockey off his horse at the start of the Kentucky Derby a few years back.
Jo leads the pack of horses around the turn but halfway through takes an awkward, sagging step, losing his momentum. The delicate formation of racers collapsed, horses beginning to rack up behind him with nowhere to go. Yeosang sees Beomgyu quickly move his horse to the outside lane, and when Yeosang tries to follow him, he loses control. With no time to stop herself, Wind Anthem charged straight into the bottleneck. Yeosang crashes into Jo’s dark hindquarters, with no time to even react. Just as Yeosang thought he was okay, Jo kicked out with his heels.
Wind Anthem’s forelegs were kicked out from under her. She pitched into a somersault at nearly forty miles per hour. Yeosang went down with her, his helpless form following the line of her fall, over her back and neck, and vanishing under her crashing body. She came down onto him with great force, skidding to a stop. Another jockey, Luis, his horse Dillon heaving down on the track, was unable to avoid the fallen Wind Anthem.
His horse gathered himself to make a desperate leap over her, rearing up on his hind legs and launching himself into the air. At the same, unfortunate time, Wind Anthem tries to push herself back up on her forelegs, lifting her directly into Dillon’s path. Wind Anthem was forced back down onto the track, flipping her upside down.
Yeosang couldn’t get out of the way, the full weight of his horse coming down upon him.
Dillon bent in the air like a thrashing fish, spinning into the ground, Luis riding him down. Dillon rises with only bruises as injured. Wind Anthem lay where she fell.
Luis limped over to where Yeosang lay. The left side of his chest was crushed.
San saw Yeosang go down, staring in horror as Wind Anthem rolled over him. He stared at Yeosang’s crumpled form, the great overturned animal. He ran to Yeosang’s side, the jockey barely conscious, his mouth wide open.
Yeosang couldn’t move, but he was conscious enough to be aware of his surroundings.
The crowd wasn’t cheering or chanting like they were, not even a minute ago. He knew something had happened to him, but he was too scared to even open his eyes to the scene. Yeosang knows enough that he couldn’t move and his body felt like it was pinned to the ground. But he couldn’t feel anything.
The track announcer was heard loud and clear in Yeosang’s ears, making him feel the need to open his eyes.
“The horse is surely down and the ambulance attendants are rushing over to.. help out Korean Jockey Kang Yeosang now.”
His horse. Wind Anthem. Hurt.
Yeosang opened his eyes, squinting immediately when all he was faced with was the sun.
“Hold her down, man!” A man shouts, with a familiar whinny following.
“It’s okay, I got it here.”
His cousin Seonghwa’s voice was all it took for Yeosang to use every last bit of strength and mentally battle his body to turn his head to the unfolding scene.
Yeosang felt his heart drop to the deepest pit of his stomach.
Wind Anthem, his beautiful black horse, was laying on her side, whinnying either in pain or at the men attempting to get close to her.
There was blood that looked like it was coming from her legs and sides but he couldn’t tell for sure.
“Her spine is shattered and it looks like she’s suffering from broken canon bone on all four legs,” the man, Yeosang assumed was the vet, said as he looked up at Seonghwa who was standing there in shock.
His cousin tries to keep calm, but every inch of his body was trembling. “Look man,” the doctor speaks up again when Seonghwa didn’t answer. He opened a box that was set right next to his leg, “I’m sorry, but we’re going to have to put her down.”
Before Yeosang could react, a person kneeled down in front of him, blocking his view of Wind Anthem and the vet.
“Hey Yeosang.. the doctors are going to take you to the hospital.”
Yeosang could make out that it was San’s voice. It sounds different to him, maybe because it didn’t sound like his happy cheery self. His friend was scared.
“S..” Yeosang gasped, trying to get any words out. His body was numb and it felt like he forgot how to speak. “San please..”
“Sh..shh it’s going to be okay.” San put a hand on Yeosang’s cheek and nodded to the doctors as they lifted his body onto the stretcher.
“San,” Yeosang looked at his friend, feeling wet tears fall down his cheeks. “Don’t let them kill her,” he gasped out. “Don’t let them kill my girl.”
San shook his head, tears falling onto Yeosang’s face, “I’ll try..” he whimpered, “Please stay alive.”
Yeosang didn’t answer him. He was looking through the gap of San’s arm as the doctors strapped him to the bed.
Seonghwa was kneeled down next to Yunho, who was petting Wind Anthem’s ears and made eye contact with Yeosang. The fear in his eyes was strikingly obvious, but Yeosang knows he doesn’t cry. He’s never Seonghwa cry.
He broke eye contact with Yeosang and looked at the Vet who has a syringe ready in one hand.
“Not here,” he heard him say. “Take her back to the stalls,” he put his hand on Wind Anthem’s body. “Just not here.”
Those were the last words Yeosang could hear before he sees darkness caving in and the sound of the ambulance doors being shut.
»»——⍟——««
It takes two minutes for a three-year-old thoroughbred horse to win a one and one-quarter mile in the biggest race in the world.
It also takes two minutes to try and calm down Seonghwa from having a full-on panic attack in the hospital emergency waiting room. San was standing next to him with one hand gripped on the back of his shirt to remind him to relax.
Seonghwa took a deep breath. “Please, continue, doctor.”
“For the moment, he’s better in a comatose state. The scans reveal a lot of bleeding inside and outside the brain, and there is some evidence of damage to the right frontal lobe.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means we wait,” the doctor looks between them and continues, “the blood clots will slowly reabsorb and we’ll be able to assist the extent of Yeosang’s damage.” He sighs and hugs his clipboard to his chest. “I’m sorry it’s not great news.”
Seonghwa runs a hand through his hair and slowly sits down on the nearest chair behind him. He has trouble focussing on what else the doctor was saying while thinking of what could happen to his cousin. Death was around the corner and he could’ve lost him that quickly.
San sat next to the other and ran his cold hand up and down his back.
“His parents said to keep them updated,” Seonghwa said. He rubbed his face and gulped a gallop of spit down his throat. “They said they can’t come to Korea to check on their son.”
San was nodding next to him, hand still soothing up and down his back. He was quiet, probably thinking the same things Seonghwa was.
Seonghwa squeezed his hands together till they shook from the ominous thoughts squirming in the back of his mind. He rests his elbows on his knees and pinched the bridge of his nose trying to keep himself calm.
“Don’t tell him anything about Wind Anthem,” Seonghwa said to the floor, “I don’t want him to get stressed about it,” he sighs. “If he... If he wakes up.” The last words came out dry.
San shook his head and took his hand off Seonghwa’s back. “He’s going to wake up, Hyung. He has to,” he looked at the room Yeosang was currently in. “I told him to stay alive.”
This time it was Seonghwa rubbing San’s back. The boy’s eyes were burgeoning with tears, but Seonghwa can tell he was trying to keep it together. San had a special bond with Yeosang that Seonghwa has never seen before between two people. The two of them have known each other ever since they were in elementary school and grew up working together on the farm. When Yeosang took interest in racing, San stayed back to support him but made Yeosang promise to let him be his lead pony.
Seonghwa put his hand over San’s when he noticed the boy digging his nails into his palm. San sighed and slowly rests his head on Seonghwa’s shoulder.
Following the doctor’s saying, all they can do is wait.
»»——⍟——««
“I warned you she wasn’t right that day!”
Yeosang could hear Seonghwa. He sounded so far away. He couldn’t move, he couldn’t see. He knew he was somewhere, but he didn’t know what to call it.
“Of course, this is sad when these things happen!” Seonghwa’s voice was louder this time, “You can’t just kill a seven hundred fifty thousand dollar athlete,”
A pause.
“I’m not signing shit until X-rays are taken.” A sigh of frustration. “You don’t care about anything do you?” His voice was heated. “Horses or people.”
That was the last of what he heard from Seonghwa. He wanted to move and tell his cousin that Wind Anthem can't be euthanized and she can continue living as his horse, but he just can't. He fell back into darkness, unable to hear anything.
It wasn't long before he heard more people.
“Yunho, stop messing with his hair,”
“Don’t worry San, pigtails are cute on him. This is the only time I can mess with his disgustingly perfect hair.”
There were giggles between the two boys.
“Okay yeah, he does look cute. He’ll freak once he sees this,” San laughs. “And the pimples on his face disgustingly perfect face.”
“Take it all in bro, this will be the only time we get to see it,” Yunho exclaimed while laughing with San.
“Hey Yeosang,” Yunho said. Yeosang can’t see him, but he knows Yunho is speaking with a playful smile on his lips. “I exercised the horses today. They were behaving, but I think it’s just because it was a beautiful day outside. You would’ve loved it. But when I got back from training, I saw San fall trying to carry a stack of hay. He’s hopeless without y- Ow that hurt!”
“Don’t tell him that!”
“You didn't have to hit me!”
“Well, he doesn't need to know that!”
They both fell into laughter.
After a while of more talking, and a lot more bickering, the two of them got quiet.
“Is he going to wake up?” San asked sotto, breaking the silence. “Can he even hear us?”
“I hope so..” Yunho’s voice was rough. “He’ll wake up and get back on the track in no time.”
“You think so?”
Silence filled the room until he hears Yunho take a big breath.
“I.. don't know.”
The next time Yeosang hears voices, they're unfamiliar and a little quieter.
“We’re expecting Yeosang to wake up in the next week or two. When he does, we’ll judge on how long he’ll need to recover from the brain injury based on the symptoms he wakes up with,” the voice was rough and not very pleasant. “So once he’s stable enough, he’ll be transferred to another room and start his physical training for his disabilities. I’m assigning him to you after those weeks are done. Any questions?”
Someone next to the man hummed in response.
“So we’re looking at maybe two or three weeks from now?” The voice was low and quiet, almost difficult to hear.
. “Just about so. He’s around your age actually,” he said matter-of-factly. “I’m sure you’ll get along quite nicely.”
There was a soft laugh coming from the honey tone of voice that Yeosang had decided he really liked.
“Maybe,” he said honeyed. “He’s the youngest patient I’ll be working with.”
“That might be good. The age could help you two form a bond.” The man said with a teasing tone. “I’m going to get going, but feel free to stay to get to know your patient. Here are some of his documents of what’s going on with him, and these are his records.”
“Alright, thanks, Doctor Choi."
“No problem, Jongho.”
When the door closed making a click sound, Yeosang heard shuffling around and footsteps approaching him at a slow and quiet pace. Papers sounded like they were being flipped back and forth and a grunt was heard next to him like he just sat down. “Kang Yeosang,” a paper was flipped. “Twenty-two-year-old jockey involved in a horse racing tragedy,” the young voice clicked his tongue against his cheek. “Well, this is new.” A pen was clicked shut before the sound of a clipboard was being set down on a hard surface beside his head. "You probsbly like country music. Do you like country music?"
Yeosang wants to cry. No, he does not.
No matter how much he liked this man’s voice, he did not want to be known for liking country just for the mere fact of liking horses. The last thing Yeosang would want is to be lying here unconscious and stuck in this state while shitty country music is on repeat.
“I don’t know many country songs, let me think..”
He waited for the boy to play some song like Big Green Tractor by Jason Aldean because for some reason everyone thinks that’s the only good one out there. But instead of hearing Jayson sing about how his girlfriend thinks his tractor is sexy and how they want to fuck in the back seats, something pleasantly unexpected filled his ears.
The honey-like voice started to hum in a slow, melodic tone.
It was a beautiful wordless sound. Yeosang swore he was entering the gates of heaven.
Yeosang didn’t know what song was being hummed, but for the first time in which felt like months, he could see imagery fill his closed eyelids.
He was sitting on a stack of hay at Seonghwa’s stables, eating his favorite orange-flavored jello while watching the sunrise in the East. Wind Anthem is running in the fields chasing San after he tried putting a halter on her, while the other horses are grazing in the blinding green grass fields. The sunlight peeked over the mountains and shined on the farm, making the color pop even brighter than it was before. Yeosang closed his eyes, taking in the warmth shining on his face. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, the euphoric humming was a continuous reminder that he is still alive.
After so long of laying lifelessly, Yeosang felt something.
The humming stopped and there was a soft, quiet chuckle. “You're crying, Yeosang,” the feathery voice said quietly. Yeosang could feel a finger wipe a wet tear from his cheek. He doesn’t recall it being there before. “You’re going to be okay.”