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The wandering wind whirled and whistled, a noisy guest announcing its return to the Frostback Mountains. Its frosty breath kissed Carly's cheeks and chilled her skin, but the prickle of goosebumps on her arms and neck brought a soft smile to her face. In a world where the sky twisted and swirled under the steady hands of change, the trail of winter on her shoulders anchored her in a sense of calm and familiarity.
Carly pulled the woollen shawl closer to her chest and leaned against the balcony railing, lips parted and breath short, to lose herself in the simple but constant magic of the stars that covered the infinite sky. In the eerie stillness of the night, broken from time to time by the wind combing her hair, the stars twinkled in a dance of light she did not understand, but loved nonetheless. From every direction she looked, a star winked at her. Carly tilted her head and looked up, eyes wide, to see them all at once. She stared at the dots stretching across the endless night sky, and their beauty and mystery burned away the ribbons of weariness that weighed heavily on her shoulders.
A soft chuckle escaped her lips as gliding flashes of light turned the velvety darkness of the sky into patches of green. In Skyhold, the Fade was no longer hidden by the Veil, and it blinked back at her as if greeting the beloved of the man who set it free. Six years later, the flashes of change still put a smile on her face. The wonders Solas brought to life never ceased to swell her heart with pride and joy. How he had changed over the years, when another touched his soul and filled the cracks created by bitterness and pain with undiluted love and hope.
No one believed her when she insisted the frost engulfing Fen'Harel's heart could be thawed by gentle hands and an open mind.
Pride wiggled in her mind and she accepted it with the gates of her soul wide open. And how could she not, when she had smashed the mountain of perpetual pride and sorrow threatening to crush Solas' goodness until all that was left was the hollow shadow of the man she loved? After years of patience and love, he allowed himself to shed his stubbornness like an overused cloak and listened to the heartbeat of a world that needed no destruction.
Thedas changed over the seasons thanks to her unwavering trust in Solas' kindness. In return for the struggles she endured and the suffering she conquered, life offered her a loving husband with whom to raise her children. A dream within a dream she dared not believe.
And yet it was real. As real as the man and the two children who snored quietly in the ex-inquisitor's bed.
Tears of joy stung the corners of her eyes, and Carly took a deep breath to make peace with the outcome of her efforts, for her mind sometimes refused to believe she had done it all. A star blinked once, twice, as if to encourage her. This world and the stars above her were as real as she was.
"Ma Vhenan, where do the wings of thought carry you tonight?" Solas' whisper, as soft as the floating seeds of a dandelion, carried the hint of worry. As his arms wrapped warmly and invitingly around her body, she leaned back into his embrace with a hum of delight. His presence hardened reality and anchored her back to the present, where the wind needled her cheeks.
"How did you know I was lost in thought?"
Solas pressed his lips on the top of her head, and his breath tickled her skin, winning a titter from Carly. "You did not hear the sound of my footsteps. And the bed creaked when I moved."
"Attentive as ever, my love."
Solas said no more, burying his nose in her locks as he always did when he gave Carly time to gather her thoughts and share with him what stirred her from the warm embrace of sleep. A wave of gratitude washed over her in the face of his patience, his ability to understand how words sometimes hung heavily on her tongue and refused to be moved. She took a deep breath, and the icy breeze of the mountains encouraged her to speak.
"I've been thinking about this world, about what we've done." Another star blinked, and its light tugged at the strings of her heart. "About the stars above our heads."
"I see." Solas' nose left her hair, and for a few seconds Carly missed the warm touch of his breath. "The stars are quite spectacular tonight."
"They are." Memories of what seemed to have happened millennia ago rolled through Carly's mind, bringing with them a tinge of melancholy. A melancholy she would gladly share with the only man who would understand. "Remember the first time we talked about the stars?"
Solas' palms pressed on her belly when he pulled her even closer, as if the small distance between them bothered him. "Yes, I remember. How could I forget our first moments in the Fade? The delightful and dangerous joy tempting me to move closer to you as we sat on the gritty path of your world. Or the shiver that ran through your body when I spoke of magic and the Fade." Carly caught the hint of his smug smile spread across his lips, but she allowed him to continue. Her body reacted as it had then, and a shiver ran down her spine at the memory of his whispered words tickling her ear. If he noticed, he gave no sign. After a few moments of silence, he continued, his voice touched by what Carly knew all too well: Regret. "And the vortex of sadness in your eyes I have glanced at. The sorrow at being torn from your world and thrown into mine. I was the black hole you taught me about, stealing your light and your joy."
"Gritty path you turned into a mattress," Carly joked to lighten the mood, but the grip of his palms on her stomach didn't soften. "Solas, it wasn't your fault. You're not like a black hole, silly."
Already missing the warmth of his body, she broke the embrace to look at him, to make him understand. The clouds of regret swirled and spun in the grey of his eyes, a storm of emotion she hoped never to see again. "You couldn't have known all that would happen. Don't torture yourself for something you couldn't control."
From time to time, Carly read the glimpses of a question on the lines of his face. A question Solas never dared to ask, but one she understood, even though he pushed it away as soon as their eyes met. At that moment, the question returned, intensifying the amalgam of emotions Carly recognised in his expression.
"Have you ever," Solas' words faltered as he bit his lower lip, but Carly's hands sought his to interlace her fingers with his, a confirmation for him to continue. At last, the question eating away at his soul for so long would soon be spoken. A fear Carly could dispel with an open mind and a touch of kindness. "Have you ever regretted meeting me this way?"
Solas drew back his shoulders and strengthened his spine, as if preparing himself for the impact of her reply. For a moment, his posture reminded Cary of the Solas she had seen on Earth, clad in golden armour, speaking the truth about his identity in a low voice. Never again, she had vowed to herself. Never again would she allow him to turn into the armoured man ready to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders, with only the cold metal of his armour to offer him solace.
"Why should I regret meeting you, my love?"
Solas' right eyebrow shot up, and with it, one corner of his mouth. His expression spoke of a dozen reasons he could offer her, but Carly continued before he dipped his toes into the sea of self-loathing. "I'm not saying we didn't have difficult times or that I forgot our differences, but to regret meeting you-?" She stood on her tiptoes to reach for his cheeks. When she cupped them with her palms, a soft whimper escaped Solas' lips. Closing his eyes, he leaned into her touch, a man in need of her love. "Never. If I had the chance, I'd do it again, just to hold you in my arms again and again until I squeezed the last drop of loneliness out of you."
"You would truly do it again?" he whispered, as if he feared the weight of her words. Carly smiled, and with it came the realisation Solas would always be the man touched by the shadow of melancholy, always ready to plunge into a swirling ocean of self-doubt and depression. For his heart would never quite heal, no matter how much love she poured between the cracks.
"Yes, ma lath. Over and over and over again. I will always love you, in this world or another. As I loved you in my world, and as I love you in this world."
"Carly, I-"
Again his words stopped, but this time it was not regret or sorrow that took his breath away, but her lips. Perhaps Solas was a scarred man,always carrying the wounds of his long life etched on his heart, but the love bubbling in Carly's chest refused to be pushed away by doubt, which stung his self-confidence like poison ivy.
Carly knew the antidote on her lips -perpetual eternal love and care -succeeded once more as Solas pulled her closer and dipped her, his lips never leaving hers. As a laugh tickled her throat, Carly broke off the kiss and let it linger in the stillness of the night while Solas grinned smugly at her, as he had when a cold screen stood between them.
"You're very smooth, did I tell you that?" she beamed at him as he pulled her back up and kissed the tip of her nose.
"I have been told that a few times, yes."
"Papae?" The whimpered whisper of their daughter pinched the bubble of flirtation growing between them. They both turned on the soles of their feet, her hand still clasping his.
"Soufeia, what is the matter?" Solas released Carly's hand to pull their daughter into his arms. The girl giggled when he planted wet kisses on her round cheeks.
"I woke up and you weren't there, Papae! You were telling me a story!"
Solas chuckled and pulled his daughter to his chest, peppering her head with kisses. A riot of giggles and squeaks erupted from Soufeia, as she wrapped her tiny hands around his back. Carly's heart flipped in her chest at the sound of this pure, undiluted love. At times, when their children sought his company, she dared not interrupt him, lost in the mesmerising sight of a man so many feared embracing his children and whispering to them the lost stories of Elvhenan.
Solas had endured blow after blow, betrayal after betrayal, and cried a river of bitter, bloody tears, and yet he had survived.
Together they survived to see their children grow up in a world they could love and explore without the Veil smothering their true nature.
"Papae, tell me the story!" Soufeia insisted when Solas tucked her back into bed. Sulenehn, splayed on the other side of the bed and drooling into the sheets, mumbled in his sleep, unfazed by his sister's loud insistence.
"What story, my darling?"
"The one about the hero who comes from another world and saves the bad wolf!"
From the balcony, Carly raised an eyebrow at Solas, but he grinned at her and held out his hand, an invitation for her to join them on the bed.
"Ah yes, my favourite story," he kissed Carly's knuckles when she sat down next to him on the bed. "About my favourite hero."
