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If it isn’t because Michael’s got a smartphone in his hand which has a map indicating he’s in the right place he would’ve been convinced he got the address wrong. But no, according to Google Maps, that four-floor building is the Take My Paw Shelter.
Another readjustment he has to make: getting used to fact that animal shelters in a big city can be massive. This one is, or at least it is compared to the building that serves as a shelter in Michael’s hometown.
Even if there was still a place for doubts about the location the sign at the entrance of the building that says Take My Paw clears them out.
Michael pushes the front door open and goes in. It’s impossible not to take a couple of minutes to appreciate the indoor decoration. There are stickers in the shape of paws by the door frame. The clock that’s on the wall on Michael’s right has two puppies as background to the numbers. The wall on Michael’s right has a calendar and the month that is on shows a dog playing on the sand at the beach and next to it there’s a metallic figure in the shape of a cat. The wall behind the desk displays over a hundred little photos of people smiling widely next to dogs, cats or even birds and turtles, all of them pets that had been adopted, Michael is sure. The place might be four times bigger but the feeling and the essence are exactly the same as Michael’s hometown animal shelter.
He walks to the desk where there’s a middle-aged woman typing something on the computer. He clears his throat, the woman takes his eyes away from the screen and says “good morning” after having made eye contact with Michael.
“Hello. My name is Michael Clifford. I’m the new volunteer. I was told to come today. You should’ve received an e-mail with my info.”
“Oh, yes. Michael! I was expecting you.” The seemingly sincere smile on her face and the fact that she called him ‘Michael’ instead of ‘Mister Clifford’ or in any other kind of formal way makes him feel at home. “My name is Danielle. You can call me Dani. Thank you for volunteering!”
“Oh, thank you for existing and for what you do. Well, not you you. I meant this place, or the people that created this place, I guess,” Michael mumbles with a hand scratching his nape.
“I get what you mean. You’re welcomed on behalf of all of us. Well, now you’re part of us.”
“Thank you, thank you.”
“I’ll take you to Calum. He’ll explain to you how things work around here and will tell you what you can do today to help us. He’s the one in charge of the rookie volunteers.”
“Sounds great.”
Dani guides Michael through a hall. “He must be in the newcomers’ room,” she says while they are halfway in. “This way.” She points to the double door at the end of the hall.
Dani pushes the door open and they go into a big room.
There’s a dog fence with four dogs about the size of an adult pug. But they look nothing like a pug. Their snouts don’t seem like the dogs ran straight to a wall, instead, they are longer and thinner. Their ears are pointing to the ceiling. Their hair is fluffy and with irregular patterns of colours that go from white, champaign, black, grey, brown to light orange. They must be mixed-race dogs.
Sat on the floor, legs crossed, is a man with a dog from the same litter on one of his thighs.
“Hi, Calum,” Dani greets.
That's Calum?! When Michael was told he’d be taken to the person in charge of the newbies he wasn’t expecting someone around his age. And he was definitely not expecting someone that…, that… captivating. Calum is wearing sports shorts that end about ten centimetres above his knees. Calum has thick legs. Michael doesn’t know if it’s an effect provoked by the fact that Calum’s legs are crossed but, damn, they look so big, and the line that very defined quadricep draws below the skin is beautiful.
He has a tank top that sticks to his chest as if someone just poured water over him. His arms perfectly match his legs, thick and defined, especially that tricep that is tensed in the arm that’s stretched to the back, palm resting on the floor. The skin is so tight there’s no way someone could pinch it.
Michael feels the need to compliment Calum, to say something nice about those muscles. Moulding a body that way for sure took many hours of workout sessions. Michael’s lucky enough to just stand there and appreciate it, the least thing he could do was praise it. But he just met the guy, and he isn’t a creep. Words about his body aren’t the first thing Calum’s going to hear from Michael.
“This is Michael,” Dani announces. “The new volunteer we talked about.”
“Be with you in a sec, Michael,” Calum replies, his eyes still on the dog. “Let me just finish brushing this little guy’s hair,” he says and grabs a brush that’s next to him.
“Alright.” Dani claps her hands. “You’re in great hands, Michael. I’ll go back to the reception ‘cause there should always be someone there. We appreciate having you here,” she says before closing the door and living Michael and Calum alone.
For a couple of minutes, Michael does nothing but watch Calum sliding the brush over the dog’s back. The way Calum smiles every time the dog makes eye contact with him is the most heartening thing Michael’s seen in his life and he knows he’s had the dumbest grin on his face since he noticed that was happening.
“Alright, buddy, you’re done,” Calum says and puts the dog in the fence to join the rest.
Calum stands on his feet, face to face with Michael. It’s the first time Calum looks directly at Michael so it isn’t until then that Michael notices those heavenly black eyes. The irises are so dark that they seem to merge with the pupils, it can’t be told where one starts and where the other begins. Those eyes are like deep voids in which Michael wouldn’t be scared to jump in, at all.
“Well, so, officially, hi, Michael,” Calum says and shakes Michael’s hand. “I’m so glad you decided to volunteer. We never have enough hands here.”
“Yeah, I know how it is. My hometown’s shelter is way smaller than this and we still always went through the same problem.”
“So you recently moved here?”
“Yeah, I’ve been here just for a week.”
“Oh, so you must not know the place yet. I gotta give a tour,” Calum offers. “I mean,” he opens his eyes widely. “If you want to, of course.”
Incredibly cute and incredibly nice. So I get to be around fluffy dogs and him on my very first day here. I’m the luckiest man on the planet.
“That would be awesome,” Michael answers in a tone that hopefully doesn’t sound as overenthusiastic as it sounded in his head. “Thank you.”
“My pleasure, Michael.” Has any other voice ever pronounced Michael’s name with that enchanting tone before?
“Alright, let’s get down to business,” Calum proposes. “Since you’ve already volunteered in a shelter you know how things work in a place like this. I guess it’s pretty similar in all shelters.”
“Guess so, yeah.”
“Yeah. So, we take pets that have been abandoned and we put them up for adoption, right?” Michael nods. “Some of them have gone through a life of neglect and abuse so they might come injured or sick so we take them to the vet. Or we have to work on winning their trust. Some of them just crawl back against a wall showing us their teeth with their tails between their legs. I don’t even want to imagine what they must’ve gone through to be that scared.”
Calum turns his head to the dogs in the fence and his lips constrict. Yes, Michael knows the feeling: anger towards those faceless monsters that made a pet suffer and desolation so big that it takes over the anger and doesn’t let it command your actions. Michael has imagined what those pets have gone through. He’s heard it, he’s seen it a couple of times. He’s sure Calum has too.
“Anyway,” Calum shakes his head and takes his eyes back to Michael. “We need patient people who are willing to spend time showing the animals we bring here that not all humans are cruel. We need people who drive cars to pick them up or take them to the vet or their new homes. One of the most fun things we do is to dress them up all cute and elegant to post pictures of them on our social media. We also do what we call adoption fests.”
“We didn’t have adoption fests in my former shelter but I can imagine what they are judging by the name.”
“I’m pretty sure it is very close to what you’re thinking,” Calum affirms. “People can meet the pets that have been rehabilitated, maybe leave some donations or apply to adopt one of them. We try these activities to be as fun as possible, so we decorate the place, bring lots of food, put on some music-”
“Next fest I could bring my guitar and play something,” Michael interrupts before his mouth gives his brain a chance to think twice before talking.
“You play the guitar? That’s so cool!”
Oh, damn, he thinks playing guitar is cool! So he thinks I’m cool, right? Or at least that me playing guitar is something cool, right? Right?
“Thanks,” Michael says as calmly as possible, pretending that he isn’t just internally bouncing at the possibility of Calum wanting to see him play. “That’s why I moved here. The whole ‘going after your dreams' thing, you know? There are more chances to make a living out of music in a big city with many bars and theatres to play at.”
“Oh, you’re so right. There are like 6 bars just along the closest avenue and, as far as I know, at least two of them have live music nights. I’m pretty sure you’ll soon have gigs everywhere.”
“I already got one, actually.” Michael lets the pride he’s feeling take over his voice and manifest into a smile. Because he is proud. He will be paid to play guitar and sing. He took a leap of faith to see if could live the dream and the dream started sooner than his most optimistic fantasies could’ve visualised.
“On your very first week here? That’s awesome, Michael.”
“I was walking down the boulevard the day after I had settled to get to know this frightening new land and there it was, on the door of the very first bar I saw, a sign that said ‘We’re auditioning bands and singers’. I ran home, grabbed my guitar and went to talk to the manager of the place. She told me she liked what I do and that she’d text me if my services were finally needed. I got the text this morning! Right before coming here.”
Michael realises that he’s just told the whole ass story of how he got a gig. A story that Calum didn’t ask for. He must be numbed by my chattering. But then Michael looks up and sees Calum’s got a smile on his face like he’s genuinely happy, an ‘I believe in you, just because you’re trying’ smile. Michael believes that as long as that smile’s image stays in his head he’ll be able to accomplish anything.
“It suits, you know?” Michael frowns. “The whole musician vibe,” Calum clarifies. “I can perfectly picture you with a cool electric guitar and a leather jacket rocking on stage.”
“I do have a couple of leather jackets and a cool electric guitar,” Michael points out, suddenly finding himself intrepid. Calum raises his eyebrows like he likes the unexpected comment. “But don’t underestimate the power of an acoustic,” Michael clears out.
“I don’t." Calum raises his palms in defence. “I bet you’ll soon become a local celebrity and will go bar after bar breaking hearts.”
“I don’t attempt to break hearts. The goal is to win them by playing their favourite songs. What is your favourite song, Calum?” Michael instantly asks and as soon as the question leaves his mouth he realises it might’ve given the thought that he wants to win Calum’s heart. Does he? “I could know how to play it, or learn it,” he shamelessly adds.
“I have many, actually. Do you promise to play me at least one?”
“As many as you want.”
“Oh my god, I’m so glad you’re here. Talking about being here, just to finish telling about what we do in this place, there’s a part that is not that fun. We have to clean poop, sometimes vomit or other messes these guys do, moving cages…”
“Don’t worry,” Michael voices before Calum’s done. He notices Calum’s worried expression like he’s afraid Michael’s going to back down after the mention of a couple of not-so-pleasant tasks. “I’m not afraid of that kind of work. Do you need me to go clean something somewhere or move some stuff?” Michael quickly asks in order to leave no space for the thought of him quitting.
“No, no, stay with me. I mean,” Calum’s tighten lips shape a smile. “Stay helping here. There are still four dogs to comb their hair and I’m afraid it won’t be quick. This kind of hair needs to be combed at least once a month or it gets knots.”
“And it looks like there are many knots in all of these guys’ hair.”
“Yeah,” Calum says with a downcast tone. “It seems like they were neglected in their previous home. Knots are just the tip of the iceberg. They arrived here after people called the police when they heard sounds coming from one of the houses in the neighbourhood. The owners had moved out the day before and left them there. These little angels had started scratching the doors. That was the sound people heard.”
“That’s horrible! What kind of human being would do that?”
“You have no idea of the things some of the animals that are brought here have gone through.” Calum takes the dog from whom he was combing the hair and holds it in between his arms and chest. “I could tell you hundreds of stories,” he says, not looking at Michael, just the dog’s eyes.
“And we have the chance to change so many of those stories and write happy endings,” Michael declares right after hearing the sadness in Calum’s voice. “Let’s add a joyful new chapter to these guys’ tales,” Michael announces after grabbing a comb and handing it to Calum.
They spend the next hour sitting on the floor, combing the hair of the four remaining dogs, while Michael listens to Calum talk about his experience in the shelter.
The stories are fascinating, but not as fascinating as the tenderness which Calum takes care of the dogs. Besides getting rid of the knots, he scratches their ears, pets them, tells them sweet words and looks at them with those tender eyes that Michael is convinced could take away any kind of pain.
Michael had already noticed the beauty in Calum’s eyes but seeing how they slowly slide over each centimetre of the dogs, like making sure not a single part of them stay uncombed; seeing them getting wet, maybe because he’s still thinking about the horrible things they might’ve gone through, or maybe because he’s very happy to be helping them.
“You have very kind eyes, you know?” Michael feels the need to point out just in case Calum isn’t aware of it. Such a thing has to be acknowledged. “They’re beautiful,” Michael adds just because he saw Calum smile when he heard Michael’s words and, right now, Michael’s priority is to keep that smile on Calum’s face forever.
“Thank you. What a nice compliment. Are you always this good at giving them?”
“Only when I have a muse in front of me.”
Calum’s smile gets bigger, to the point that it makes wrinkles appear on the corners of his eyes. Michael might get addicted to that image.
“Talking about compliments,” Michael says after his eyes go to observe how Calum unties a knot on the dog’s chest. He notices Calum’s hands are big and his fingers very long but he moves them over the tangled hair as if they were knitting needles on a yarn “You were born for this, to take care of animals,” Michael completes the idea.
“I hope so, considering that I go to vet school.”
He’s cute and smart, how am I supposed to come to the shelter every week and pay attention to anything but him. “Wow, what a hero you are,” Michael says with hints of fascination in his voice. Being a veterinarian is such a challenging and interesting profession. “You’ll literally be saving lives.”
“That’s the goal, yeah.”
…
According to Michael’s phone, one hour has already passed. Have minutes become shorter? It seems like it’s only been 5 minutes since he met Calum and they sat on the floor to comb the dogs’ hair. Why does time have to be this cruel thing that moves flying when you want it to go the slowest?
“They look even cuter now,” Calum says after leaving his comb on the floor.
“And happier,” Michael notes when he sees two of them biting their bodies in a very playful way.
“Let’s take them to the sleeping room,” Calum says as both of them stand up.
Michael goes to chase one that’s particularly enthusiastic about running. When he grabs it he sees Calum’s already holding the remaining four dogs between his arms and chest.
Calum’s shoulders really are broad: it takes four dogs to cover the whole area in between them. Michael can’t help to think that his own body would perfectly fit between those shoulders. Calum's definitely hug material.
“You don’t need me for this,” Michael says after a humorous huff, eyes fixed on the dogs in Calum’s arms.
“Oh.” Calum chuckles. “I do, I do need you for this!” he replies rashly. “I can’t open the door. Would you mind?”
“Of course not.” Michael opens it and extends his hand to indicate to Calum he can get out.
…
“So, Michael,” Calum scratches the back of his neck. “Are you hungry?”
Three hours of constant work left no room for food-related thoughts in Michael’s brain but, now that Calum asked, Michael’s back to being aware of his body’s needs. “I am. Very hungry, actually.”
“There’s a very nice cafeteria three blocks away from here. We’re done here and since you told me you don’t know many places in the city yet I thought I could take you there,” Calum proposes. “Unless you have other plans, of course,” he says with his eyes on the floor for the remaining words.
“I’d love to go and have lunch there. With you,” Michael feels the need to add, hoping Calum perceives that what matters to Michael is to do something with him.
“Awesome! My friends Ashton and Luke work there. I could introduce you to them. I guess you haven’t had time to make new friends either.”
“Apart from you, I haven’t made any friends here.”
“Apart from me.” There’s a smile on Calum’s face when he repeats Michael’s phrase like he’s as happy to be called Michael’s friend as Michael is to call him that way. And even when there’s a part of Michael’s heart that feels like ‘friend’ is a small word to represent what he would like Calum to be, he’s more than happy with it for now.
Since the cafeteria is closed they decide to go by walking.
Michael arrived very early at the shelter, when the sun was barely out, so the almost noon sunlight gets him by surprise and makes him narrow his eyes as soon as he opens the door to the street.
He hears the door lock behind him and turns around to face Calum. That’s when Michael realises that the gloomy artificial light of the bulbs inside the building was keeping him from appreciating the beauty of Calum’s skin. It seems like it’s made of tiny golden sparks that reflect an even stronger light than sunlight itself.
It’s June, summer isn’t in its cruel stage yet so the five minutes walk to the cafeteria doesn’t make them sweat much.
Michael’s only two steps in and he hasn’t tried the food yet but he already feels like that’s a place he’ll like to come to too frequently. Maybe is because Good Riddance by Greenday is softly playing on the speakers, maybe is because of the little stage on the corner that makes Michael dream he could have a gig there, or maybe is because any place could feel like the most welcoming place in the world if Calum enters it with him.
“Could I ever get rid of you?” a tall blond guy with golden sparkly nails addresses Calum as soon as he and Michael sit.
“Michael, remind me not to tip the waiter,” Calum asks without making eye contact with the tall guy.
“Michael,” tall guy says in a funny tone that Michael isn’t sure what it means. “Very nice to meet you.” They shake hands. “I’m Luke, Calum’s friend. Apparently, Calum comes to this place over 7 days a week because he thinks just because two of his friends work here he can get extra rations of anything he orders. Calum, Ashton cooks and I wait tables. We don’t own the place. You won’t get double rations of french fries for the price of one.”
“Hey!” Calum squeaks with a little laugh intertwined with the sound. “I’m not here after the french fries. I came here because Michael moved to the city this week and doesn’t know the place or anyone. Sorry for being hungry after two hours of doing shelter stuff and for wanting to introduce Michael to my best friends.”
“Oh, a shelter buddy, nice.”
“He’s mine, so don’t try to take him from me.” Michael knows Calum’s joking, but he still feels the words I won’t let anyone take me from you almost leave the tip of his tongue. “And I know you’ll want to take him from me, you and everyone. Michael sings and plays guitar and already got a gig at a bar. He’ll soon be playing here for sure and he’ll have people swooning over him.”
“I can talk to the manager and see if I can get you to play here,” Luke offers.
“For real?” Michael exclaims. Luke nods. “Thank you so much. That’s so nice of you.”
“Talking about being nice,” Calum interrupts after clearing his throat, “are you going to take our orders or-“
Luke rolls his eyes. “Yes, Calum, I am gonna take your orders. Could you tell your stomach to chill out? I’m just helping a friend here.”
Michael knows this is one of the cases when big words are said with small meanings. He knows there are many things to live next to someone for the word ‘friend’ to have the significant connotation it actually has. But the fact that Luke just used it referring to him makes Michael believe Luke has shown there’s space and time in his life for that word to get to truly represent their relationship.
And that is comforting, calming. A week ago, when Michael was packing his bag the night before leaving home, a rush of panic took over his body. Yes, trying to make a life of his own in an unknown place was daunting, putting his talent on trial to see if he got what it takes to make a living out of that was scary, but having to go through that all alone was terrifying.
At least now Michael dares to think he won’t see vacant spaces when he looks around. He’ll see Calum and Luke.
“Anyway,” Luke addresses Michael again. “Calum can give you my number and I’ll let you know what the manager says.”
“Awesome. Thanks again.”
“So, do you know what you’re having? I’m sure you already do, but Michael hasn’t even seen the menu.”
“It’s alright,” Michael says. What do you recommend, Luke?”
“Oh, I love the veggie lasagna,” Luke suggests in a very enthusiastic tone. “Ash makes it all the time when he visits us at home. He’s about to finish his shift so it is now or until the day after tomorrow when he works here again.”
“Sounds good, yeah. I’m having that.”
“Perfect. And you’re having the veggie sandwich, as usual, right Cal?”
“Exactly.”
“Something to drink?”
“I’ll have a coke,” Calum answers.
“Hot tea, please.”
“Alright. I’ll be right back.”
“Don’t forget to tell Ash that I want extra onions!” Calum says loudly when Luke has already turned his back around.
“I hate you,” Luke replies louder but without bothering to face Calum.
“He loves me,” Calum tells Michael with a giggle and the wink of an eye when Luke is halfway to the counter.
Ten minutes later Luke’s back carrying a tray with their meals and drinks on. “Ash’s already done,” he mentions after the food’s on the table. “Give him 5 minutes to finish picking up his stuff and he’ll come to say hi.”
“Yeah, we don’t mind waiting. I mean,” Calum cuts the phrase, shakes his head and looks straight at Michael. “I don’t mind waiting. You must have stuff you wanna do. Meeting Ashton obviously isn’t one of them.”
“So you’re saying that the new guy in the city doesn’t want to meet people? Are you kidding me? Of course I don’t mind waiting for your friend to finish picking up. Besides, we’ll be here for over 5 minutes for sure, we haven’t even started eating yet.”
“Exactly,” Luke says. “I’ll leave you two to it. Plus, other customers need my attention. So, if you excuse me.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Calum mutters, mouth full right after taking the first bite of his sandwich. "By the way,” he adds, now with an empty mouth, “there are extra onions in here, you bitch. Unlike you, Ashton is a real friend.”
Luke limits his reply to a snort and a roll of his eyes and moves towards another table.
Calum laughs softly, lovingly even, like there’s a fond sentiment behind teasing Luke.
And, as Michael starts drinking his tea, he can’t help to smile against the cup. They seem to love each other, that Ashton guy as well. They have a very comforting dynamic and in just a few minutes they’ve made Michael feel like a natural part of it.
“So,” Calum’s voice interrupts Michael’s thoughts. “Are your cheeks always that pink or do they get like that ‘cause you’re having a hot beverage.”
“Oh,” Michael voices right after swallowing the sip of tea he had taken. He wasn’t expecting Calum to notice that detail. “It can happen when I’m drinking something hot. But it can also happen when the temperature is cold. Or when I spend more than 5 minutes under the sun. Or when I do a demanding physical activity. Sometimes it happens just because.” Michael shrugs. “It’s a function that comes by default with us pale fellows and I haven’t found the settings to turn it off yet.”
“Well, it makes you look very cute, you know?”
“Thank you.”
Michael conveniently forgot to mention that getting nervous is one of the things that makes him blush too. Being thrown a compliment by someone he likes falls in the category of things that make him nervous. At least he hadn’t giggled like a 3-year-old watching cartoons which is another side effect of getting compliments by nice cute guys. He’s sure the colour on his cheeks has almost reached the crimson tonality but he’s glad he could blame it on the tea.
“You know I’m watching you play, right?” Michael frowns. “On your gig day at the BAR NAME?” Calum replies to Michael’s silent question.
“Oh, thank you. That would be awesome.” Michael was sure he was going to practice a lot for the big night and now he knows Calum will be there, that’s the motivation he needs. “It’s nice to know there’ll be a familiar face in the crowd. I won’t deny I’m afraid I fuck up and the crowd be mean to me.”
“Don’t worry, Mike.” Calum reaches across the table and gives Michael what seems like a comforting pat on the shoulder. “I guess it has to be a monumental fuck-up for a non-musician to notice. Also, if you wanna have more familiar faces in the crow, I could ask Luke and Ash to come with me.”
“Do you think they’ll wanna go?”
“Are you kidding me? Those bastards have been complaining that the three of us haven’t gone out together for like a month. You know, being an adult and stuff. This week when we all have free time we’ll fallow each other to the end of the world.”
“Then, yes, yes, please! Ask them to go.”
“As long as you promise to make eye contact with me from time to time.”
Saying that Michael will make eye contact with Calum is an understatement. He will search for Calum’s eyes right before putting his fingertips on the strings for the very first time, before the jitters make him think he forgot how to play. He’s going to look at Calum from time to time, randomly, just to make sure he’s enjoying himself and Michael hopes that on one of those occasions it turns out Calum is looking at him too.
“Your eyes are very nice to look at,” Michael points out and he’s not sure if he should say “I’ve been staring at them for a while now. It’ll be my pleasure to make eye contact with you on the gig,” but he does anyway. Calum’s smile when the words are spoken makes Michael know he made the right choice.
“Now I’m not afraid of no one showing off,” Michael declares. “At least I know I’ll have a crowd, even if it’s a three-people crowd.”
“Talking about three people-crowds.” Calum looks over Michael’s shoulder. “That’s Ash.” He points to a curly-headed man that is just passing the counter and is heading towards them.
“You must be Michael,” are his very first words right after he sits at the table, not even acknowledging Calum’s presence.
“I am, yes.” Michael can’t suppress a chuckle when he sees Calum’s indignated face after being ignored.
“Michael, the musician.” This time, when Ashton speaks, he looks at Calum and his eyebrows are taken to the top of his forehead. Calum makes quick eye contact with him and then looks to the ceiling even quicker. Michael could wonder what’s going on but he’s too busy thinking about how pleasing the words ‘Michael’ and ‘musician’ sound together.
“Oh, my god,” Calum huffs right after talking. “Luke always complains that he barely has time to go to the toilet while working here, but somehow he has time to gossip all about Michael to you. Unbelievable.” Calum finishes his sentence with a dramatic roll of his eyes.
“Calum has a thing for musicians, did he tell you that?” Ashton addresses Michael, ignoring Calum again.
“It’s not a thing!” Calum protests tapping his tighten fists on the table like a child would when they’re not given what they want. It’s cute if Michael’s being honest with himself, especially now that Calum has the most adorable pout Michael’s ever seen in his life. It will be tempting to piss Calum off just for the sake of seeing that plump lower lip at its finest moment.
“I admire people who play instruments,” Calum explains. “That shit’s hard. Isn’t it.” He looks at Michael for support.
“Right,” is the only thing Michael can say. His mind is too entertained by the thought of Calum admiring him.
“So, Michael,” Ashton voices after it seems like he feels that his job teasing Calum is done. “What do you think of my man fluffy-cheeks-Cal?” Well, now it seems like he’s done with the teasing.
“I don’t know why you’re saying that as if it was to make fun of me,” Calum replies before Michael has time to speak, no pout this time. “I take it as a compliment, mate. My fluffy cheeks are damn cute.”
“Gorgeous really,” Michael’s brain makes him say out loud. He instantly takes his eyes to the table, a bit embarrassed by his boldness. But, c’mon! Calling Calum’s cheeks just ‘fluffy’ is the understatement of the century. Michael needed to correct that.
“See, Ash?” Michael hears Calum reply but still doesn’t dare to look at his face.
“Gorgeous, uh?” Ashton says. When Michael finally raises his eyes he comes across a smirk from Ashton and even tho it’s not what Michael would call an aggressive smirk it looks teasing enough for him to move his gaze away from Ashton. “Alright,” he taps the tips of his fingers together. “What do you think of my man gorgeous-fluffy-cheeks-Cal?”
“He’s pretty awesome.” Michael muses a bit before continuing talking. After the ‘gorgeous’ that split out of his mouth, he doesn’t want to risk saying something embarrassing again. “What he does at the shelter is remarkable and he’s studying to save puppies’ lives. Plus, he offered to show me around and introduced me to his friends.”
“And he’s bringing those friends to your gig,” Calum adds. “Speaking of which, Ash, are you coming with me to see Mike’s first gig in the city?”
“Oh, so you already got a gig? Congrats, mate. Of course I’m going. I hadn’t realised I was introduced to a star.”
The temperature on Michael’s cheeks starts raising. He’s sure he’s turning red again. It’s not the fact that he got called ‘a star’ what has him feeling like that. It’s Ashton’s dimpled smile that indicates Michael he’s just made a new friend what accelerates his heart and fills up the blood vessels in his face with happiness.
“I’m going too.” Michael hears Luke’s voice in a very melodic tone and soon realises Luke’s right behind him.
“Mate, where the hell do you come from?” Ashton protests after flinching and putting a hand on the left side of his chest.
“Oh, I just move around. But I have a gifted ear that allows me to listen to the important stuff. I can go too? Right, Mike?”
“Yes, of course you can. I was just telling Calum that if the three of you go I’ll have a mini crowd guaranteed.”
“Well, you’re mini crowd is guaranteed,” Luke says. “When I first heard the conversation I thought only Calum was gonna see you play, as in a date thing.”
Hearing his name, Calum’s and the word ‘date’ makes Michael’s heart start beating so fast. Is there a way Michael can hide his head from Calum for Calum not notice he’s blushing one more fucking time? But then Michael realises Calum is blushing too! And he’s eyes are glued to the table.
“Then you mentioned Ashton was going,” Luke continues, “and I figured out you guys will wait a bit until doing that.”
Dating Calum? Yes, Michael would love to get to know Calum better, to spend more time with him, ideally somewhere nice, maybe while having dinner at Calum’s favourite restaurant in the city. Luke needed to mention the word ‘date’ for Michael to realise that’s what he wants with Calum.
It’s obvious now that the perspective of asking Calum out is what has Michael nervous and blushing. Calum’s blushing too, his cheeks and Michael’s are on their unique shade of red, but red at the end of the day. Is it for the same reason?
“Guys, I gotta go,” Ashton interrupts Michael’s internal search for answers. “Lauren’s finally home for the summer vacation and I haven’t seen her since she arrived yesterday.” Ashton looks at Michael. “Laurent is my little sister, she goes to college in another city.”
“Got it,” Michael says. “You must miss each other very much. Have a nice time.”
“Thanks.”
“Hey, Ash,” Luke talks right after Ashton stands up. “Could you go to the drug store and buy me a couple of condom packages?”
“Mate, why do I keep buying your condoms? I don’t even like to have sex. Why should I buy condoms at all?”
“C’mon, Ash,” Luke begs. “I ran out of them and I’ll be working late today and tomorrow. And the drug store’s on the way to your mom’s home.” Luke ends his statement with pleading eyes that Michael’s sure are not necessary.
“Fine,” Ashton accepts with a defeated tone after rolling his eyes.
“Actually,” Calum’s voice and his hand on Ashton’s wrist keep Ashton from leaving. “I could have a couple of packages too.”
“You could?” Ashton says, one eyebrow raised.
“Yeah. I’m not seeing anyone, but still.”
Calum is not seeing anyone. That’s information that makes Michael happy.
This time Ashton doesn’t fight it, he just huffs and says “That makes sense, the ace guy comes out of the drug store with four condom packages.” Behind his ironic tone, there’s a laugh that’s fighting to go out. Calum and Luke are holding one as well.
“And you,” Ashton talks to Michael now, “do you happen to need condoms too?”
“Well,” Michael says shrugging and after he speaks he can’t help to burst out a laugh. The three of the other guys do it right after him.
…
Working at a shelter is a volunteer thing, Michael doesn’t get paid to do it. He’s even thinking he might be willing to pay to do it. He can’t come up with a better way to spend time than being sitting on the floor, his crossed legs, a fence around him, surrounded by kittens and playing with them. He’s been there for 20 minutes, letting them climb on his lap, rolling paper balls for them to catch and having playful fights in between their pads and his fingers. He could be there for hours.
He hears the doorknob being turned around. His daytime dream is about to be interrupted.
“Dani told me you were here,” Calum says as soon as he enters the room. Michael was wrong, the dream has just gotten better.
“I am,” Michael responds. He can’t see it but he’s aware of the foolish smile on his face. It could be because of the fluffy cats around him. It could be because Calum’s there. Why not both?
“Look at all of you so cute,” Calum comments.
There are 5 adorable kittens in the room and Calum thinks Michael’s at the same level of cuteness. That has to be the best compliment about his appearance Michael’s ever received. The fact that it came from Calum is a plus that pushes the idea of asking him out further in Michael’s head.
“You belong there, you know?” Calum adds. “You’re just another kitten, all adorable and… caressable, with beautiful yet intriguing eyes that makes you want to look at them for hours.” Fuck! Calum has just taken the best compliment of Michael’s life to a superior level.
“Well, you know what?” Michael tells him when he’s done processing what he’s heard. He reaches out, takes one of the kittens that’s on the opposite side of the fence’s interior and puts her on his lap. She has her face, belly and sides white and an irregular line of black coat from the top of her head to the tip of her tail. “When I was 18 I had my hair almost exactly like this little girl,” Michael explains.
“Really?”
“Yeah. I was going for a hard punk kind of look,” Michael admits in a mocking yet nostalgic tone.
“And now do you go for a soft punk kind of look?” Calum asks. At first, Michael thinks is a teasing type of question but Calum’s not laughing.
“Oh,” Michael waves his hand down, “I’ve always been soft. The difference is that my choice of clothing projects it on the outside. Now you can tell right after you meet me. Back in the day, you needed way longer to realise. I don’t know,” Michael shrugs, “like 5 minutes.” He can’t help to laugh at his own words and Calum follows him instantly.
“It’s been such a busy day, right?” Calum notes after both of them are back to a neutral expression. “We haven’t had time to say more than ‘hello’ to each other and I wish I could hang out with you for longer but I already gotta go. I just came here to say goodbye and to at least see you before leaving.”
“A lot of school work today?”
“Not really, no. I’m leaving but I’m still on shelter duty. I gotta pick up a donation at a place not far from my apartment. Some people are donating sheets, pillows, leashes, toys, cleaning products and other stuff. They told me to go any time after three. I’ll keep the donation at home for a couple of days until the storage room is cleared out then I’ll bring it here. Wish me luck ‘cause the donation’s big, I think it even includes a cage so I might have to do two trips.”
“I could go with you and help you.”
“Yeah?”
“If you can wait for a tiny bit, yeah. These little ones’ mom was taken to the vet to check how the c-section wound’s healing but they already call to say she’s on her way back, so probably not more than 10 minutes ‘till I can leave.”
“Alright, yeah I’ll wait. Thank you for offering to come with me.”
“No problem. It’ll make up for the time we didn’t get to spend together today.” It’s been almost a month since they first met and during that time they both have stated on multiple occasions they enjoy each other’s company, whether it’s just the two of them or when they hang out with Ashton and Luke. That’s why Michael doesn’t shy away from saying to Calum that it’s nice the day gave them a chance to compensate for the fact that they barely saw each other.
“Although,” Michael continues, “I’m not sure if you need help. No matter how big the donation is, you might be able to carry the whole thing yourself with those biceps of yours.”
There’s a second where Michael thinks he should’ve shied away from saying that but that fear disappears when he sees Calum looking proudly at his arms and then says “Thank you. I work out really hard. It means the world to me that you notice.”
…
It turns out Calum does need Michael’s help. The donation isn’t gigantic but it’s difficult to carry. The issue is that it includes two cages instead of one like Calum thought.
For the first half of the way, Calum takes them while Michael carries the bags with the rest of the things, and they switch for the second half.
In about 20 minutes they make it to Calum’s apartment.
As soon as the door is open a tiny fluffy creature runs past Michael and goes straight to Calum’s feet. Michael leaves the cages on the floor and when he looks up he sees Calum with it in his arms.
“Hi, boy,” Calum tells the dog that is wiggling his tail with so much energy that his butt swings along with it.
Calum takes a few steps toward Michael and says, “Michael, I want you to meet someone very important. This is Duke, one of my best friends.”
“Hi, Duke,” Michael greets with a bit childish voice but the moment and Duke deserve it. “You seem so happy.”
“Yeah, he’s always like this when he sees me after being out for a while. To be fair, if I had a tail, I’d be wagging it exactly like him right now ‘cause I was as eager to see him as he was to see me.”
Michael chuckles at the thought of Calum with a tail. Although, now that Michael muses on it a bit, a tail wouldn’t look that bad on Calum. It would suit him, actually, with his hair as fluffy as Duke’s, with his squeezable cheeks, his cute flattened nose that invites you to tap your fingertip on it, and his puppy eyes. Wow, it now strikes Michael that Calum looks like a puppy. And he had thought Calum couldn’t get any more endearing. He was so wrong.
“Do you wanna hold him?” Calum asks.
“Would he like that? He just met me.”
“Yeah, no worries. He has an instinct to know who treats animals with kindness and who doesn’t. I think all dogs have it. Here.” Calum holds his arms out with Duke in them and Michael takes him.
As soon as Duke’s against Michael’s chest he starts wagging his tail.
His hair is so soft. Since Calum’s hair looks similar, Michael wonders if it feels as soft as Duke’s. Maybe he’ll get to touch it sometime.
“How come we’re both volunteers in a shelter and I never mentioned I had a dog,” Calum says. “There are dozens of dogs there, it wouldn’t have been hard to bring up the subject.”
“Yeah, but we’re always so busy and focused on what we’re doing, so I don’t think is weird you forgot to mention it.”
“Well, since we are on the subject now, do you have any pets?”
“I do. See? I didn’t mention mine either. I have two dogs. South, a chihuahua that brings out a huge personality to compensate for his small size.”
Calum laughs. “Oh, yeah, chihuahuas are dogs with a strong character.”
“Tell me about it. And I’ve got Moose, a curly-haired gal that loves to sleep in my bed and knows that just ‘cause she’s cute she can get away with it.”
“They all know they are cute and use it to their advantage for sure,” Calum states with a serious voice as if he had just uncovered a conspiracy, but then laughs at his own overacted paranoic tone.
“I adopted them from the shelter where I used to volunteer,” Michael explains.
“That’s very noble, Mike. I found Duke years ago next to a dump when he was a puppy. I don’t know how someone can abandon a living creature to starve to death.”
Michael sees the same sadness in Calum’s eyes he saw when he first explained to Michael what some dogs in the shelter have gone through. But there’s something very close to hate in his eyes, not quite yet but not far from it.
“South and Moose would love to meet you,” Michael says to take Calum’s mind out of people who abandon animals subject. They don’t deserve any thought from Calum, not even a hateful one.
“Oh, I’d love to meet them.” A grin is on Calum’s face now. “What would you say if we go to the park this Sunday and we take our dogs on a play date?”
“They would love that. I would love that!” Michael’s going on a date with Calum! Well, it’s the dogs’ date, and it’s a playdate, but it’s a date, right? They’ll be on the dogs’ date. Michael gladly takes it.
“Great! Calum exclaims. “I’ll take a ping pong ball and my frisbee. We’re gonna have so much fun.”
“Oh, Georgia loved to chase frisbees.”
“Georgia?” Michael realises he said the name out loud after Calum repeats it.
“My dog,” Michael says. He wasn’t planning on talking about her but now that Calum asked he can’t ignore the question. “I had her for a long time. She passed away a few years ago.”
A particular memory pops in Michael’s brain: He’s at a park, in his old town, Georgia’s sitting next to him on the grass, tongue hanging out of her mouth after being running around for way too long. Suddenly, drops start falling over them from the sky. Georgia stands up, her tail wagging as fast as Duke’s when he first saw Calum today, and she starts barking. She loved getting soaked in the rain while running and sliding over wet grass and mud. Michael had to give her a bath afterwards but it was so worth it after seeing her so happy. That specific day she was particularly enthusiastic, barking in front of Michael, calling him to join her. So he did. They ran next to each other in the rain, Michael’s shoes and pants ended covered in mud and Georgia’s curls looking brown. It was the best day ever.
“I loved her so much. I miss her so much,” Michael says when he realises he might’ve been gone for too long. He didn’t expect his voice to sound so weak. He blinks and then feels his eyelashes getting wet. Fuck. He can’t be crying right there, in front of Calum, out of nowhere. He feels a wet trail going down his cheek. Yes, he’s crying. Fuck.
“Shit,” Michael says after rubbing the back of his hand against the wet part of his cheek. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to go all sentimental here. You must think I’m stupid.” Michael huffs out an ironic laugh and can’t help to take his gaze to the floor.
“Hey, don’t put words in my mouth I haven’t said. What I think is that you’re a loving sensible guy. I like that very much.” When Michael dares to straighten his neck and look up he sees Calum is a step closer to him. “You loved Georgia very much,” Calum puts a hand on Michael’s shoulder after speaking. “You still do.” Calum’s fingers bend a little over the skin, firmly, and Michael finds it comforting: he’s trembling to the verge of falling but Calum is the firm stick he can hold to.
“What you’re feeling is normal,” Calum explains. Maybe it’s because of what he’s saying but it’s now that Michael notices how beautiful Calum’s voice is. It’s not a matter of pitch, it’s not because it’s high or low. It’s because it’s soft, Michael can feel it on his skin. It’s soothing.
“You’re just having the natural reaction we have when we remember those that are gone,” Calum continues, “those that we love,” he concludes, picks up Duke and hugs him tight between his arms.
There are still tears in Michael’s eyes, probably more than there were two minutes ago, but now he’s not afraid of taking his wet eyes to Calum’s. Those big puppy black irises are wet too, which just makes Michael cry even more but a smile is tugging at the corners of his lips as well. He let it all out, he finally talked about it with someone, and he knows he chose the right person to do so.
…
Why do you buy a million guitar picks if you can’t find one when you need it? They are small, but not that small. There’s something Michael’s completely sure about: there’s no way in hell he isn’t going to take his guitar to the park. Calum asked him to.
Michael’s taking his guitar with him if he ever finds a fucking pick! He can play fingerstyle if he doesn’t have any other option but Calum said he wanted to listen to Michael’s acoustic version of American Idiot and those power chords need to be played with a pick to sound right.
He finally finds one in the pocket of one of the pants that were in the laundry basket.
Maybe 4:05 PM is a little too early to be doing his hair, considering they agreed to meet at 5:00 PM, but Michael’s hair, even when it looks in a way that pleases him, is the rebel kind of hair that requires time to be combed. His blond strands are among the things Michael likes the most about himself, having them perfectly taken care of makes him feel confident and he surely needs all the confidence he can get before meeting Calum.
As he’s making sure his fringe falls on the right side of his forehead his phone starts ringing on the bed. He doesn’t know the number but he picks it up anyway.
“Hello?”
“Hey, Michael.”
“Calum, is that you?”
“Yeah,” Calum barely says the word. It’s probably the shortest ‘yeah’ Michael’s heard in his life.
“Why aren’t you calling from your phone?”
“I’m at the vet clinic,” Calum explains. “Duke’s having an emergency surgery right now”
“What?! Oh my god!” Many questions can be asked right now. What happened? How bad is it?... But “what vet clinic are you?” is the one that Michael instinctively asks.
“The one where we picked up the labrador the other day. I had to run here so I forgot the phone. That’s why I’m calling from the clinic’s phone. I had to tell you not to wait for me today for the dog’s playdate. Sorry for cancelling.”
“Are you fucking serious? Don’t think about that now. I’m coming. I’ll be there in 10.” Michael doesn’t even give Calum time to reply, he hangs up the phone, grabs his wallet and leaves the house.
…
The vet clinic isn’t big but Michael still is worried he won’t find Calum right away. Calum hadn’t taken his phone with him so Michael couldn’t call him.
But as soon as Michael enters the waiting room he sees a man sitting on the nearest chair to the reception, elbows on his thighs. Michael can’t see his face because it’s hidden behind his hands but Michael would recognise those broad shoulders, that bronze skin and that curly hair anywhere.
He stands next to Calum. “Hey,” he says in a low voice after putting his hand on Calum’s shoulder.
Calum lifts his head and looks at Michael. His eyes are dry but the red pools in which those black pupils are floating are an indication that he had been crying.
“Michael,” Calum says, but it’s less than a word. It’s a weep. It’s like that’s the thing Calum needed to say the most. The instant sound of Calum’s voice, at the very beginning of Michael’s name, was broken, but as the name was taking shape on Calum’s lips, his voice showed some relief, like seeing Michael was something that can make Calum feel better. In a situation where Michael doesn’t know if there’s something he can do to help, realising that his presence has a positive effect on Calum makes him feel less powerless.
“I’m here,” Michael replies. It’s obvious that he’s there, but his physical presence isn’t precisely what Michael’s trying to acknowledge.
Calum throws himself on Michael, his arms wrapped tight around Michael’s back. Michael puts his arms around Calum’s shoulders and hugs him back. When it seems like Calum realises he’s being hugged, he tightens his hold. His body is broader than Michael’s but he had turned himself into a small quivering ball so as long as Michael keeps his arms open wide Calum will fit between them.
“Do you wanna tell me what happened?” Michael whispers close to Calum’s ear.
“Duke.” Calum’s voice is low but Michael hears him perfectly because they remain close, the hug hasn’t ended. “Yesterday he didn’t leave his bed the whole day, not even to bring me his ball to play. He stayed like that today and didn’t want to eat anything. So I brought him here. While the doctor was examining him he threw up, and there was a little bit of blood. Blood, Mike!” He says that last part louder, horror filling up his voice. “They did a radiography and it showed something like a seed. He probably swallowed one of the fruits there are in my sister’s yard when we went to visit her.”
Michael knows the answer to his upcoming question might be one that’s hard for him to hear and even harder for Calum to say, but he has to ask it in order to know the best way to help Calum.
“Is he gonna be ok?” Michael’s voice sounds weaker than he had foreseen.
“He’s going through surgery now,” Calum explains, his face and tone are plain now like he’s trying to hold his emotions down otherwise the information won’t be delivered properly. “His organism will try to digest the seed and it’s gonna end in his intestines where it’s highly likely to cause an obstruction. He should be ok but,” panic has taken over his features and voice again, “it’s a god damn surgery, Mike! He could-, he could-”
Michael doesn’t let him finish saying it, it hurts Michael that the idea even wanders Calum’s mind, so he pulls Calum for a hug and soothes him with a hand sliding over his hair.
“He’s my family, Mike.” Calum’s words are intertwined with weeps.
“Of course he is, Cal. I can tell how much you love him. He knows it too.”
“I really hope so,” Calum says after he lets go of Michael’s hug. A tear comes out of Calum’s eye and Michael traps it with his thumb when it’s halfway down Calum’s cheek.
“Come here,” Michael suggests tilting his head to the seats next to the reception.
Calum stares at them motionless. Michael’s sure Calum’s too tired to stay standing but his brain doesn’t have the strength to coordinate his legs and move towards the chairs. So Michael grabs his hand and pulls him to them.
“There are people taking care of him right now,” Michael tells Calum once they are seated. “People who know what they’re doing. He’s going to be ok.” Michael knows that’s such a cliché thing to say but his rational part genuinely believes those words.
With a long exhale, Calum slides his body up to the edge of the seat and rests his head on its back, eyes on the ceiling.
This isn’t a moment to let Calum spend too long in his head, hurting himself with images of tragic outcomes of the surgery. So Michael decides to ask questions that for sure have been asked to Calum before, questions that he wants to know the answers to but might be considered trivial given the situation that’s been living, nevertheless, questions that could make that uncertain period end faster.
“Tell me about the rest of your family.”
A succession of quick blinks goes on Calum’s eyes as if he had just woken up from sleeping. “What?”
“I already met Duke, tell me about the rest of your family.”
His face displays what seems to be a little smile that’s fighting to go through this intense moment and get to Calum’s lips. He probably knows what Michael’s doing, he knows that’s just a question to distract but he seems to be willing to play along.
“I have an older sister, Mali,” he says after a sigh. “She’s a vet. I’ve loved animals and have wanted to become a vet since I can remember but I probably got that from seeing her doing what she does. My dad’s a football high school coach who probably gets more competitive when it comes to playing FIFA than when it comes to an actual match.” Calum’s eyes stay fixed on the ceiling but at least they’re not soaked anymore. “I get very competitive too when I play FIFA, to be honest.”
“I love FIFA,” Michael informs.
“I love having things in common with you,” Calum says. He keeps his head on the back of the chair but turns it to the side and takes his gaze to Michael. “Speaking of which, my mom plays the uke. I thought about her when you told me you play guitar. She would love you, Mike. So would Mali. And my dad, as long as you don’t beat him at FIFA too many times.” This time, a smile is able to gain a place on Calum’s face. “I gotta take you to meet them some time.”
Calum wants me to meet his family! That has to mean something good.
Calum slides his body to the side of the chair and rests his head on Michael’s shoulder. If Michael could, he would turn himself into a pillow just for Calum to be comfortable. Or maybe he shouldn’t. Maybe the type of comfort Calum’s searching for is not the one that comes from a fluffy surface, is the human kind.
“They will all love you,” Calum whisper and he shifts his body a little closer to Michael. “What is not lovable about you?”
Michael could say many things now. He could say he’s not perfect, that there are parts of him that aren’t that lovable, hopefully not too many, though. He could thank Calum for delighting him with such good-hearted words. Most of all, he wants to tell Calum it will be a pleasure to get to know his family, his human family. But this isn’t a moment for Calum to listen to Michael’s sentimental rambles. This is a moment to comfort and support Calum.
So Michael puts his hand on Calum’s, where it’s resting on the armrest. At first, he only puts his fingers over Calum’s, barely touching them. He doesn’t see any sign that he’s making Calum uncomfortable so he rests his fingers completely on Calum’s.
Calum sinks his head on Michael’s shoulders and rubs his nose a little bit on the skin. Michael allows himself to tighten his hand’s grip on Calum’s. When his fingers close over Calum’s, Michael feels Calum’s shoulders going down and his body relaxing. Then he sees Calum closing his eyes and keeping them like that.
So, for the following minutes, Michael doesn’t say a thing. He doesn’t want any misplaced word to ruin this soothed state Calum’s in. What he does is take a hand to Calum’s hair. Calum responds with a sigh when Michael starts running his fingertips over Calum’s scalp.
“Mister Hood,” a voice calls.
Calum lifts his head before Michael even has the chance to look in the direction from where the voice came.
“Yes, I’m Mister Hood,” he states right after jumping out of the chair.
“The surgery was a total success. Duke is completely fine, and he’ll get better now that he’s got that seed out of his system.”
Tears start filling Calum’s eyes again, at a much faster pace than ever before. Now Michael realises how harder Calum was fighting to keep it all together.
“He’s recovering from the anesthesia,” the doctor explains. “It’ll do him wonders if you go see him. Would you like to?
“Yes! Please, yes!” Calum’s voice is shaky.
“Great, follow me, please.”
“Wait!” Calum says a bit harshly. “Can he come with me?” He’s looking at the vet and his eyes have nothing to do with the tone of his voice, they’re practically begging.
It surprises Michael a bit. He was ready to not be acknowledged and be left there while Calum went to see Duke. He wouldn’t have minded. He’d wait as long as needed and every second he’d spend in the waiting room would go smoothly knowing that Duke is fine therefore Calum’s fine too. But he wants Michael by his side.
“It depends,” the vet responds. “We don’t want the experience to be too intense for Duke. Is he familiarised with…” she looks at Michael.
“Michael. Clifford. Michael Clifford,” Michael informs.
“Yes, yes,” Calum states with a succession of quick short nods. “Duke loves him. Michael’s had him in his arms.” Calum turns his head to Michael. “Right, Mike?” He leaves his hand fall on Michael’s shoulder rather than actually putting it there, seeking a fast confirmation from Michael.
“Yes,” Michael addresses the doctor, “as far as our contact’s gone, Duke feels comfortable with me. I’ve got dogs as well, if that makes any difference.”
“Alright, Mister Clifford, you can go in with Mister Hood.”
“Thank you, doctor, Calum says. “Can I go see Duke now?”
“Yes, of course. This way, please.” She guides them to a room not far from the reception.
Duke’s lying sideways on a table that’s covered with blankets, eyes closed.
“Look how he’s breathing,” Calum whispers, “so softly, so constantly.”
“I’ll give you some privacy,” the doctor says and immediately leaves the room.
As soon as she closes the door behind her, a sob scapes Calum’s throat and he throws himself into Michael’s arms. “He’s alright, Mike, he’s alright,” he says with a shaky voice.
“Yes, yes he is,” Michael replies and wraps both of his arms around Calum’s back. “Talk to him, Cal,” he encourages. “The doctor said he’s getting awake. He might hear you.”
Michael lets go of his grip so Calum can walk to the table. He only takes one hesitating step.
“Duke? Hey, boy,” he calls the dog with a sweet voice that moves all of the strings in Michael’s heart. Duke wags his tail but keeps his head resting on the table.
“He can hear me, Mike,” Calum exclaims with a smile Michael thought he wouldn’t see today.
“Yes, he does, Cal! Keep talking to him.”
“Boy?” This time it’s louder than the previous whisper and his steps to the table are bigger, faster, he’s not doubting anymore, he’s going directly to Duke. Michael follows behind.
Calum positions himself right in front of the table, moves his hand towards Duke’s head and as soon as he makes contact with Duke’s coat he smiles.
When Michael stands next to Calum he sees Duke has both his eyes opened.
“How are you, boy? You scared me. I guess you were very scared too. I’m sorry I wasn’t by your side. They told me to wait outside, I had to if I wanted them to help you the best way possible.” Calum’s voice starts cracking and just when it seems like he’s going to break again he smiles and adds: “but I’m not leaving your side again.” Duke wags his tail as if he’d understood each one of Calum’s words. He probably did.
A tear rolls down one of Calum’s eyes and even when Michael knows it’s a happy tear, he puts his hand on Calum’s shoulder and curls his fingers. Calum turns his head to the side and smiles looking directly into Michael’s eyes.
For the following minutes Calum doesn’t say a single thing, he just keeps sliding his hand over Duke’s head or scratching his ears and chin.
From time to time Michael as well goes to pet Duke. It’s so heartwarming to see that Duke wags his tail when Michael talks to him for the first time. Michael enjoys having that kind of close contact with Duke but he doesn’t overpet him, this is Calum’s moment, it’s Calum’s time to be there for Duke. Michael will have plenty of chances, he’s planning to spend as long as possible with Calum, having Duke close is one of the many incentives.
The movements of Duke’s tail started becoming a bit more energetic. “You’re feeling better, right, boy?” As soon as Calum said that, Duke shifts his position to be lying on his belly. Before any of them have a chance to do anything he stands up but as soon as his four feet are on the table he trembles and falls to the side. Luckily there are plenty of covers over the surface so it doesn’t seem Duke hit himself hard.
Calum looks at Michael with panic but, more than panic, his eyes are asking for help.
“I’ll call the doctor,” Michael says before Calum even try to speak. “Stay here with him.” Calum nods and puts both his hands on Duke.
Michael pokes his head out of the room and spots the doctor by the reception right away.
“Doctor, Duke’s trying to stand,” he voices, not very loud because the reception isn’t far.
“Don’t worry,” she says as she walks toward the room. “That’s a good thing, actually,” she adds once inside.
“Is it?” Calum asks with his eyebrows at the top of his forehead.
“Yes, yes. That means the anesthesia is leaving his system and he feels good enough to try to move. It’s normal that he shakes a bit, the drugs are still in his system. Even when he’s weak, he’ll try to get up and leave because he’s in a place with a bunch of strangers rather than at home.”
“A bunch of strangers that saved his life,” Calum addresses the vet. “Thank you so much, doctor.”
“Seeing Duke and you are fine is enough recompense. Now, he has to stay here in observation for a couple of hours. If everything goes how is supposed to, he can go home after that.”
Calum nods and it seems like the doctor takes it as a satisfying answer because she says “call me if you need anything. If not, I’ll be back in 30 minutes to check on him again,” and then she leaves again.
“Ok, so I have two more hours here,” Calum tells Michael. “You better go-“
“Find you a cup of coffee,” Michael cuts him off. “You really need it. Am I wrong?”
Calum sighs. “Yeah, I do.”
“There has to be a cafeteria somewhere in here. You’ll drink coffee and then we’ll call Ashton and Luke. You haven't called them, have you?”
“No. Everything happened so fast. I called you ‘cause we were supposed to meet at the park. I was gonna call them but that was when the vet started explaining to me about the surgery and then you came and-“
“Relax,” Michael interrupts. “I’m gonna call them and we’ll tell them what happened. I’m pretty sure Duke would love to see them at home.”
“Oh, yeah. Duke loves them.”
“Alright. I’ll be right back. After coffee and calling Luke and Ashton we’ll sit here in front of Duke and you can rest your head on my shoulder while he gets strong enough to go home.”
Calum nods. Michael turns around and when he opens the door he feels Calum’s hand gripping his. He instinctively grips back and Calum tightens his fingers.
“Hey, Mike.” Michael turns around. “Thank you so much.” He hugs Michael right after speaking his words. When Michael puts his arms around Calum he perceives Calum’s relief, gratefulness and happiness and, with them, he feels his own.
…
Michael made sure he had the cookies with him. He can’t leave them at home, after everything Duke went through he deserves to have his favourite snack all the time.
South and Moose have been sniffing at the bag the whole ride to Calum’s home. They’ll have to wait until they get there so everyone can eat, so Michael puts the bag on the backseat, next to his guitar.
Calum doesn’t live far from Michael’s so it’s a short ride.
“It’s me,” Michael voices from the other side of the door. He’s holding the cookies’ bag in one hand, Moose’s and South’s leashes in the other and has his guitar hanging on a shoulder in a guitar bag, so he can’t knock. He hears a few voices talking all at the same time but he doesn’t understand what they’re saying.
After a long minute of Michael wondering what the hell is going on in there, the door is opened in front of him.
“Hey, Ashton,” Michael greets.
“Calum’s a terrible host,” are Ashton’s first words to Michael. “He doesn’t even bother to open the door. He makes his guests do it all.”
“My guests?” Calum speaks. “You guys lost that honorary distinction the day you started taking food from my fridge without asking. In fact, that’s exactly what Luke’s doing right now.”
Ashton rolls his eyes. Michael finds the whole ‘argument’ highly amusing.
“Hi, cuties,” Ashton tells South and Moose, his tone has completely shifted to a high-pitched sweet one. “You must be Southy and Moosy.”
“They like you.”
“Come in,” Ashton invites. “We can get to know each other better in the living room,” he tells the dogs. “Let me help you with that.” He grabs the cookies’ bag and walks in.
As soon as they get to the living room Michael can’t help to smile widely at the view in front of him: Calum’s lying on the couch, a blanket covering him from his feet to his ribs and, looking like a ball of fur, it’s Duke on Calum’s chest.
When Michael takes two steps closer to the couch Duke raises his head and, when he sees Michael, he starts wagging his tail.
“Duke, my little fighter, you look so good!” Michael says when he gets right in front of the couch and then he pats Duke’s head. “I couldn’t wait to see you.” Michael looks at Calum and he sees him smiling. “And I couldn’t wait to see you either,” Michael tells him while patting his head now.
Calum doesn’t move, he just raises his gaze to look at Michael from his comfortable position on the couch. “I’m so glad to see you too. You have no idea. I’m wagging my tail under the blanket.”
“Oh, my god. You didn’t say that.” Michael hears looks voice from the kitchen and then a mocking snort. “That’s the lamest seductive line I’ve ever heard,” Luke says once he’s in the living room, a sandwich in his hand and a dog by his side.
“Giant head, sleepy face, angelic glow,” Michael talks to the dog. “You must be Petunia.”
“Hey!” Luke whines to Ashton. “Stop describing my dog like that!”
“Why do you think it was me?” Ashton defends himself with an offended face that’s not fooling anyone.
“It’s always you, Ash,” Calum replies in between laughters.
“At least I said ‘angelic glow’.”
Luke snorts and has no other option but to laugh as well.
Michael squats to be at Petunia’s height. “You do have an angelic glow,” he tells her while petting her. “And you’re so cute.”
“I wouldn’t call her cute,” Ashton mutters but it’s clear everyone hears him.
Suddenly Michael sees a cushion flying straight to Ashton’s face.
“Dude!” Ashton yells at Luke.
“Petunia is cute,” Luke states firmly.
“Oh, you’re so gonna regret that,” Ashton says, throws the cushion to Luke’s face and runs to the kitchen.
“Don’t hide from me, you coward,” Luke admonishes while chasing Ashton. Petunia goes after him.
Michael can hear both of their laughs from the kitchen.
“They’re gonna stay there cushion-fighting like two kids for a while,” Calum explains. “And then they’ll stay for a while longer eating more of my food.”
“Now I see why you make them open the door.”
“Exactly. It’s the softest punishment I can think about for the big problem they are.”
“But they are a problem you love, right?”
“Yeah,” Calum admits after a sigh and there’s a little smile on his face. “I’m glad you bought the guitar,” he says.
“Well, it seems like you guys had a nice time the other day when you went to see me playing at the bar but I didn’t have the chance to play all the songs that you guys mentioned on the way there. You know how it is, there’s a setlist made to try to please everyone so-“
“Michael,” Calum cuts him off. “Are you seriously explaining why you didn’t play all the songs that we wanted to listen to that night?”
“No, you’re right.” Michael chuckles. “But at least I can play some of them today.” He specifically has in mind ‘I Miss You’ by Blink 182 because Calum mentioned once that the first album he ever bought was the I Miss You EP.
“Hey, Mike, since we’re talking about the bar, when are you playing again there?”
“On Friday. Why? Are you coming?”
“Yeah. But, what do you say if it’s only me this time and then we have dinner at some nice restaurant?” Calum proposes his eyes on Duke rather than on Michael.
“Are Ash and Luke working that night? And, Cal, I usually have dinner before playing a gig.”
“He’s asking you on a date, dumbass,” Ashton screams from the kitchen.
“Oh” it’s the only sound that comes out of Michael’s mouth.
Calum’s turned red by the time Michael looks at him. His eyes are still on Duke but then he moves them and seems like they are the heaviest thing in the world but he’s finally able to take them to Michael.
“Yes, yes I am,” Calum says. “I’m asking you on a date.”
The last time Michael felt as happy as he is now was probably when he adopted Moose. He wants to scream ‘yes’ right away. Why isn’t he screaming ‘yes’?”
“I feel so comfortable next to you,” Calum declares, “free to express my deepest emotions, safe to be vulnerable. We make a great team at the shelter, everything works better when it’s just the two of us. Would you give me a chance to be there for you? Would you give us a chance?”
“Yes,” Michael has to fight the butterflies in his stomach that are trying to steal his words to be able to speak. “I would love to, Calum.”
“You guys are not gonna start making out here, right?” Luke says behind Michael. He enters the room with Ashton by his side and they take a sit.
Calum chuckles, apparently nervously. The perspective of kissing him has an almost suffocating temperature taking over Michael’s cheeks.
“Alright, alright,” Ashton’s voice saves Michael from being the one to do the talking. “Let these two discuss the kissing stuff on the date.”
“Fine,” Luke reluctantly concedes. “When does my private concert start?” he asks after clapping his hands together once.
Michael grabs his guitar. While playing, he takes his eyes to what’s around him: two guys that he now can call his friends, four of the noblest creatures in the world lying relaxed next to people that love them, and Calum. Calum with his captivating smile that displays his gorgeous fluffy cheeks and those tender black eyes that start glowing when they see Duke.
Michael feels comfortable. Michael feels sheltered. Michael feels happy. A frightening new land has turned into the safe place he’s now grateful to call his.