Archive of Our Own

Obi-Wan searched through the halls of the Temple again. He could not find Quinlan anywhere. He had just returned from a long mission on Mandalore a few weeks ago. And Quinlan was avoiding him, he was sure of it. Why was his friend avoiding him?

Quinlan had been there to greet him that first day, and had seemed happy. He'd been around the next few days. Obi-Wan had thought there might be something wrong underneath his usual cheerful persona, but hadn't been able to get the chance to pry.

And now? And now his friend was nowhere to be found. Nowhere in their usual places. Nowhere in the halls, not in his rooms. He'd even had Master Tholme tell him that Quinlan had just left for no reason once. Obi-Wan was getting worried.

There was something wrong, and it had to do with him. Obi-Wan wanted to know what so he could make up for it, fix whatever mistake he'd made. He loved his best friend, and he didn't want to lose Quinlan over this. Especially since he didn't even know what 'this' was.

Obi-Wan entered a meditation room on a whim. The walls and ceilings were decorated with constellations and galaxies. They could be shifted to views from whatever planet a person wanted. It was their favorite meditation room. And... no Quinlan.

Obi-Wan poked at the console to have stars on Kiffu at this time. Kiffu was Quinlan's favorite to look at. Obi-Wan sank onto a cushion and let out a breath as he stared at the stars around him. He didn't really want to meditate but maybe he should.

“What do I do?” he groaned. “What did I even do in the first place?” He put his head in his hands.

There was a noise as someone walked across the room, gently moving cushions out of the way. Then the person sat down in front of Obi-Wan. But whoever it was... didn't say anything.

Obi-Wan composed himself and looked up. Right into Quinlan's uncertain eyes.

“Um... Sorry Obes... I was working through some feelings... not really your fault.”

“Okay... but then... what were you working through? Can I help? Why avoid me?” Obi-Wan asked in rapid succession.

Quinlan shook his head. “I don't want to put it all on you, Obi. It's my thing to deal with.”

“It's something to do with me isn't it?”

“Please drop it,” Quinlan asked quietly. “I don't want to talk about it.”

“Oh.” Obi-Wan slumped. Quinlan normally shared everything so long as it didn't break mission security or whatever. So clearly this was big. And it hurt, that it was too big to share. “Well... maybe we could go swimming?”

Quinlan considered the option. “Yes, I think that could be good.”

Obi-Wan grinned. “Great. Let's go. I haven't had a chance to go swimming since I got back.”

“Alright, alright.”

They took a moment to grab their swim things and then when they reached the Room of A Thousand Fountains, they ducked into the locker room to change. Obi-Wan changed quickly, then realized that Quinlan was putting on his swim shirt. With his psychometry, it was often easier for him to swim with a shirt. At least when he was feeling out of sorts.

But... Obi-Wan caught a glimpse of bruises. He frowned and resolved to ask after they went swimming. That way he had time with his best friend before he ruined things.

Over the course of the time they spend swimming, Obi-Wan noticed that Quinlan winced whenever they hit each other too hard during one of their games. The bruises must be bad.

But otherwise... it was almost like nothing had changed, almost. There were times where Quinlan seemed oddly hesitant. Times where he was about to say something and changed his mind. Obi-Wan decided it was better to leave it alone until they were done.

And so... he watched Quinlan take off the wet swim shirt in the locker room. And stepped closer, seeing that yes, there were some rather nasty bruises on his back.

Obi-Wan put hand on Quinlan's arm. “Where did those bruises come from?” he asked, worried.

“Nowhere. I just wasn't careful enough.” Quinlan was shifting in that way that said he was telling a lie. As he always did when he was safe.

“You're lying,” Obi-Wan stated quietly. “Don't you trust me, Quin?”

Quinlan flinched and looked away. “I do. I just... I'm a senior padawan, I can handle it on my own.”

“Handle what?” Obi-Wan jumped in.

“Nothing, it's fine. I'm fine. Please just... leave it alone Obi. I got this.”

Obi-Wan narrowed his eyes. “If whatever this is gets too bad, you will tell me, right?”

“I will, I will,” Quinlan promised hurriedly, though he didn't meet Obi-Wan's eyes. And then, without another word, he finished dressing and fled.

Obi-Wan slumped once more. What was up with Quinlan? Why didn't he trust Obi-Wan anymore? How could he fix this? He had to respect the boundary Quin had laid out twice, but he was so worried...

.

Over the next two weeks, Obi-Wan observed. He stuck with his friend as much as he could, and started picking out patterns. Quinlan didn't want to be seen with him. Almost all their time together was away from their rooms, and in rooms that were not well known. Quinlan would often hang back to leave after Obi-Wan. There were a few times he felt safe enough to be around Obi-Wan but those were rare instances. And it hurt.

But Obi-Wan was too determined to figure out what was up with the bruises to let the hurt get to him. He'd deal with that later. If it turned out that Quinlan was quietly trying to leave their friendship behind, Obi-Wan would be heartbroken but he would accept it. It really would break his heart. Obi-Wan already felt his heart breaking more and more with how much Quinlan was hiding from him.

And then, two weeks in, he realized there was a pattern he'd missed that could explain it. Every day after lunch, where Quinlan did not eat with Obi-Wan, Quinlan was joined by a group of senior padawans on his way out of the cafeteria. When he thought about it, he realized that every time he saw Quinlan after that, Quinlan seemed to be quieter. He was wincing with movement sometimes.

Obi-Wan was pleased to have figured something out. He followed them at the next opportunity. He didn't want to assume anything. But he had to know what was going on, had to be certain that everything was okay. Were those other padawans causing the bruises? Why was Quinlan not saying anything?

So he followed them, all the way to an unoccupied classroom. He stayed just outside the door, listening. Listening for more information. He didn't have anything to go off of. Yet.

And he was horrified by the things they were saying, what they were telling Quinlan to do. And then, when he protested any of it, they hit him. Obi-Wan could tell by the sound.

Before they could leave the classroom, Obi-Wan retreated to the meditation room, setting it to Kiffu once more. And he started planning. He needed to do more information gathering, but now he needed to make sure he collected evidence as well.

He considered the facts. Quinlan was being bullied. More than that, he was being hazed as he had only been promoted to senior padawan months before. They were telling him he couldn't hang out with junior padawans, he couldn't do this and that. They were trying to tease him about Obi-Wan supposedly being in a relationship with Satine.

Hazing. Obi-Wan had heard about hazing before. It happened all the time. Most of it was just mild stuff, welcoming people to the rank or group with small pranks about what they need to do and all that. At worst, it usually was mildly embarrassing, or even just someone doing more work than necessary with a nice side effect of being more prepared than average and coming off better than they normally would.

But every so often, a group would get vicious. Sometimes it would take generations of hazing before it was caught. It'd start with the mildly embarrassing, then get more embarrassing, slowly over generations getting humiliating and dangerous until finally someone caught them or the person being hazed got them in trouble. Oftentimes, this was because the people being hazed wanted to do what happened to them to the next ones in line. Only they'd do it worse.

Obi-Wan decided his first course of action, besides continuing to gather information was to research how hazing was dealt with in the past, where the line was, what kind of evidence was used short of the victim coming forward, and so on. Once he had that, he'd keep gathering information.

He would get those bullies in trouble. And he would also get them good with pranks. Obi-Wan lit up. That was perfect. He still needed to do the research, but he had the beginnings of a plan and he hoped it would work. He wrote out all the notes he needed on this and then he went to start his research.

After such a long mission, he was due for two class cycles in a row, so he had half a year to sort this out rather than a quarter. He would make the most of it.

.

Quinlan wasn't sure what was going on with Obi-Wan anymore. Obi-Wan had not just backed off of questioning him, he had stopped being so pushy about hanging out. And it hurt. He didn't really want to stop hanging out with his friend. But... he was supposed to. He was a senior padawan after all, and the other padawans kept saying he couldn't join their study groups until he stopped being a baby.

It still hurt. And he didn't think it was accurate. Which was why he had been doing it quietly where they couldn't catch him and Obi-Wan before. He wanted to have those study groups available, but he hadn't wanted it to entirely be at the costs they were demanding. The costs just seemed to keep climbing too. He was always sore.

Sometimes he wondered if it wouldn't be better to just do the senior padawan thing solo. Sure, the classes he was taking now were open to knights and masters as well as senior padawans, but he could do it with little help. Right? He wasn't dumb, just liked pretending he was. But Obi-Wan...

Some of the times Quinlan saw Obi-Wan he saw that scheming face of pranking and he wondered who put that there. Who deserved to be the target of that scheming? But he'd lost the right to know.

Quinlan just hoped this would all be worth it. Obi-Wan would be alright. He would be a senior padawan in two years and then they could rebuild their friendship. Right?

...he knew this was wrong. But it was the only way to get the study groups to agree to let him join. They were right, too. Master Tholme was the only one who would believe him and that ultimately wouldn't get him very far. Because no one would believe him.

Quinlan was just a no good troublemaker, after all. He could not wait until the next proper shadow mission came along instead of all the little investigations they were doing on Corsucant in the meantime. Some so small he was doing them on his own.

One day he would be free of such expectations and could be himself again. Could just pretend that never happened. One day.

.

Obi-Wan's plans were working. He had successfully caught each of those senior padawans in at least one prank. A lot of them were group pranks that caught other padawans, but that was necessary if he wanted to catch them at all. There were more senior padawans involved than he thought. Mostly just the oldest. The ones who were 'in charge'. Obi-Wan bet that if some of their older friends like Luminara or Kit were involved there wouldn't be a problem.

Now, Obi-Wan needed to let them catch him. He had to get a confession out of them, a recorded one. He had a good plan. He told Qui-Gon where to find him if he wasn't back to study and work on homework by a certain time, he had a way to record, and he knew they were all angry about the pranks.

He hadn't thought they'd blame Quinlan, but he should've known they would. Which was why he made sure Quinlan had gotten caught in a couple of the minor ones. They stopped blaming Quinlan after that. Quinlan seemed a bit stunned to have actually been caught in a prank; no one had ever been able to do so, aside from Obi-Wan when Obi-Wan wanted to. Or maybe Quinlan was stunned Obi-Wan was pranking him for no reason.

Obi-Wan set up his prank. He was just getting to the last stages when the group of padawans walked in the door, triggering what he already had set up. It was spectacular, several buckets of paint fell on top of them. Quinlan had been at the back of the group and caught the splashes of the paint rather than the full deluge.

“That's it!” One seethed. “We have to- YOU!”

Obi-Wan's eyes went wide. He had not expected so much rage. Well, at least the act wouldn't be as difficult as he was expecting then. He looked around frantically for a way out, still holding the bucket of glitter he was going to rig to blow on them, then he ran for the vent, tossing the glitter behind him.

They cursed, and now aside from the very stunned and bewildered Quinlan, they were all seething with anger. Perfect. Obi-Wan smirked to himself as they yanked his legs down from where he was trying to pull himself into the vent.

“Junior padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi. You think you can get away with pranking us?” It was Seeshi, one of the oldest senior padawan's currently. Known to have a bit of a temper.

Obi-Wan laughed. It was hard to take her seriously with the blue and green paint dripping down her face. She was a togruta with neither color, so it looked hilarious, especially combined with the glitter. As he doubled over laughing, he slipped his hand into his robe, starting the recording, and then straightened up, still laughing but trying to stop.

Laughing was the wrong thing to do, of course. He let out a grunt when he was punched in the stomach. The air was knocked out of him, and he no longer could laugh at her. Or any of them. He was so busy recovering from the punch that he didn't have

a chance to fight back when they snatched him.

He struggled against them. Three were holding him in place on the ground. One sitting on his legs, one each holding his arms. Seeshi, being one of the main ringleaders, was in front of him, and other padawans were watching. So was Quinlan. His eyes were wide, and he was shaking, ever so slightly.

Obi-Wan hoped Quinlan could forgive him for this next part. Because if he was right, they were about to really test Quinlan. Obi-Wan wanted that to happen. He wanted them to egg Quinlan into hurting or humiliating him. To destroy their friendship. Regardless of if Quinlan gave in or not, Obi-Wan would have the recording of what they were doing. It would be clear that this was hazing, and that this was terrible hazing. Add in all the bruises Obi-Wan already knew were forming and they were all going down. They just didn't know it yet. And every little thing they did... would only make things worse on themselves.

Obi-Wan definitely wanted them to make it worse on themselves. It was going to be glorious, when they realized what they did. And it was going to be worth it. He didn't care if Quinlan actually wanted to be his friend or not. He just wanted Quinlan to stop hurting and be free to actually make that choice for himself.

“Padawan Kenobi. You keep pranking us. Leave us alone.”

“Why don't you leave Quinlan alone?” he shot back. “I saw those bruises.”

Quinlan's eyes widened and he flinched as everyone looked at him. “That was weeks ago. I didn't think he'd remember.”

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes. “I'm not stupid.”

“I rather think you are. Setting up a prank in here, thinking you could get away with it after being caught in the act. You will be punished for this misdeed.”

“Oooh, I'm so scared,” Obi-Wan mocked. “You're not the Council, or my master, or even teachers. You're just dumb senior padawans who like to make others hurt for being younger than you. Maybe so that you forget how you were hazed when you became a senior padawan.”

One of the ones holding him slammed his head into the ground angrily. Obi-Wan bit his lip to keep from crying out, tasting blood.

“You need to learn to keep that mouth shut... Now what to do with you to teach you a lesson, hmm? Let's start by tying you up.”

Obi-Wan struggled as they expected against being tied up. He didn't go all out; he was very advanced at escaping and they were not good at this. Not like those he'd had to escape from in the past were. Now those were a challenge. He was less than impressed when they gagged him so he couldn't talk, but his recording was still going, still untouched. It would be enough, even if they stopped it now.

He glared at them when they stepped back. He was tied to a chair, unable to do anything. Well, he could escape but he was happily pretending that he could not. After all, better to let them dig their grave, and only Master Qui-Gon would suspect he had gone along with it. No one expected him to be able to escape from this sort of thing.

“There we go, quiet and still while we figure out how best to handle you.”

“He's normally pretty modest. How about we take off his clothes? He can wear whatever he can find that's salvageable when we're done with him. It'll look like a prank.”

“I like that idea. Quinlan, you should help them.”

“Wh-what?” Quinlan stepped back. “I can't do that to him.”

“You want to be a part of our study groups?

Quinlan nodded.

“Then you need to do it.”

“But it's wrong. I can't embarrass someone that way.”

“Get over it if it's because you still consider Obi-Wan your friend. Remember he's a crybaby and got involved with someone on a mission recently. And if it's not... Well, you just have to get used to it. Because embarrassing people is something we do as part of our study group. You want the benefits, you have to do the uncomfortable stuff too.”

Quinlan hesitated until he was shoved forward, falling onto his hands and knees.

“Unless you want to join him? Be further humiliated than you already have been?”

Quinlan let out a noise of protest. “Okay, okay, I will do it.” He stood and helped, but didn't meet Obi-Wan's eyes.

Obi-Wan felt horrible for him. Quinlan probably would get in trouble too, for giving in. But it was so easy to give in when they were pressuring so hard, when study groups among the senior padawans was especially important to passing their classes. But hopefully he would get of lighter for being pressured into it.

He shivered at the feeling of bare skin in the cooler air of the classroom, stripped to his underwear. He waited, eyes darting around. This was what he wanted, but the reality of it was a bit more embarrassing than he expected. A bit more panic inducing than he expected, even knowing he could escape if he really wanted to. He still didn't think he could ever regret this.

“Now what do we do? Ideas, Quinlan? Something that will really have an impact.”

“Um...” Quinlan looked around desperately for ideas. Then he spotted a twi'lek padawan. “Uh, Xepo? Aren't you practicing tattooing?”

Obi-Wan's eyes widened, horrified. He did not want a tattoo, why would Quinlan go for that of all things. Something so permanent.

Xepo lit up. “Oooh can I practice on Kenobi?”

“Yes, I think that's a wonderful idea. Start with... a heart and that girl's name. What was it...?”

“Satine,” Quinlan said quietly.

“Yes, Satine, start with that, and then we'll see if we want to do something else.”

“I think I'll put it on the chest, right over his actual heart.”

Obi-Wan squirmed, protesting loudly behind the gag. He did not want a tattoo and he was not in love with Satine. They hadn't even dated!

“It'll take me some time to get ready.”

“Alrighty. In the meantime... how about we just beat him up a bit. Stay clear of the chest, we want to ensure Xepo has the best practice he can... but everything else? Fair game and if Xepo wants to do more tattoos later... oh well.”

Obi-Wan grunted in pain a few times, but mostly stayed silent despite the pain, bracing himself. He stared sadly at Quinlan. Quinlan was getting away with not participating this time. Probably because he had come up with a brilliant suggestion.

Quinlan wouldn't meet his eyes, uncomfortable with what was happening, but not willing to stop it. He hadn't even entirely realized how bad it was until this moment. He hadn't even entirely expected them to go for the tattoo idea. That was a rather extreme idea.

Xepo the budding tattoo artist was ready and got started. He took his hobby seriously and made sure everything was ready before starting the tattoo. Everyone hung out and talked, discussing classes while he worked.

Obi-Wan bore the pain silently. It wasn't that bad. It was like getting scratched by a tooka. Repeatedly. In the same area. But it wasn't too bad. Even if it was starting to bring tears to his eyes. He would be fine. Really. Seriously.

Quinlan kept glancing at him, at the progression of the tattoo as it slowly transformed into an outline, then a proper filled in picture with colored inks. He hated the tattoo, and hated that the idea of the tattoo was his. Where did he even get that from?

“You know, I think it's time you had that conversation with Obi-Wan.”

Quinlan jumped and went wide eyed. “Already? Now?” His voice wavered.

“Yes, already, now. We've told you. You have to give up all friendships with junior padawans until they're senior padawans. They have no room in our study groups and you need to focus on your upcoming Trials, not baby drama.”

“Right... right.” Quinlan fidgeted but stepped up to Obi-Wan, still not meeting his eyes. “We can't be friends anymore.”

“Like you meet it, and actually look at him, see how he reacts.”

Quinlan dragged his gaze to Obi-Wan's face. Seeing his best friend, in pain, pleading, made it harder. “Ob-K-Kenobi. We c-can n-not be fr-friends anymore.”

Someone removed the gag from Obi-Wan's mouth. Obi-Wan took a couple seconds to assess. He would be best off if they didn't know he knew what was going on, that he was playing along. The question was just how to play it. He decided to go with letting his feelings get the better of him.

“Why not Quin?” he asked, teary eyed. “Why can't we be friends? You promised you would always be my friend and you'd never leave me alone?” Obi-Wan sounded close to begging.

“You're... You're...” Quinlan glanced at Seeshi and stiffened at the ropes in her hands. “You're annoying. You're a crybaby and cry over everything. You shouldn't even be a padawan. You didn't even really get a master, he just felt like he had to take you. I was just your friend because I pity you. You're so pathetic.”

Obi-Wan was surprised to find himself crying. It almost sounded as if Quinlan was reading a script, but it was a convincing script and more emotion bled into Quinlan's voice and it just made Obi-Wan feel worse.

“W-What? You lied to me?” Obi-Wan demanded through his tears.

“Of course I did. You wouldn't leave me alone, ever. Even when I wanted you to.”

“You're the one who clings to everyone, especially at night!” Obi-Wan snapped. “You don't take anything seriously and you have a problem with boundaries in that you don't even seem to notice them. You think you're so great because you can do shadow stuff but you're really not. Shadow stuff isn't real Jedi work, and it just puts you more at risk of Falling, I shouldn't be surprised that you ended up with this crowd, giving into what they want you to say and do.”

Quinlan flinched back, hurt, holding back the tears. Now he was lashing out. “I was protecting you! I'm always protecting you! And then you went and started dating that Duchess and that's all you talk about! You're not interested in anything I did. You didn't want to talk about the Temple just about how awesome Mandalore was and Satine is. You love her and Mandalore so much, you should've just stayed there since you're clearly not meant to be a Jedi!”

Obi-Wan froze, tears pouring down his face. Quinlan had gotten the wrong idea. Why? But that was all overridden by the last comment.

“Then why don't you prove how much you hate me, huh?” Obi-Wan said angrily. “You didn't really do anything if not ordered to why not punch me or something, prove you really mean it. I think you're a fucking coward. So scared of failing as a Jedi, of Falling that you're willing to do anything, even break up a friendship just to get some extra help. I can't believe it. This isn't you. Sure you have your problems but I've always loved having you as my friend Quin and now we're both just going to throw it all away over this?”

Quinlan didn't have a response, but the tattoo was finished. Xepo cleaned it off, put the bandaged on it as was required and cheerfully put everything away.

Obi-Wan glared at him some more.

“So how long do we have to take advantage of this? When will Kenobi be missed?”

“Not until after dinner time when he's supposed to be working on homework,” Quinlan responded quietly, once more unable to look at Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan gave him a betrayed look, though part of him was wondering why Quinlan was claiming he wouldn't be missed until after dinner. Qui-Gon preferred he help prep dinner, not just be at dinner. Was Quinlan actually trying to get him in trouble?

(No, Quinlan just hoped Qui-Gon would come looking at that time to get them both out of there and didn't think they would accept an even earlier time as accurate)

The next two hours alternated beating him up and giving him bruises with paints and other ways to humiliate him. They were going so far, Obi-Wan was starting to wonder how they expected to cover this up. How they were expecting to explain away everything about him.

Quinlan didn't always participate and he never initiated, but they were all satisfied with that. Probably because they were having too much fun and he wasn't protesting. Just being silent and rubbing at his own bruises in memory. Rubbing his wrists, remembering being tied up to a chair like that though they hadn't gone that far on him.

“Now what?”

“Maybe we could use him as an example? There are quite a few living in the junior padawan dorms right now. Maybe we could go like, stick him to the wall or something. We'll still be long gone by the time someone comes looking for him. And it's dinner time.”

“No more keeping quiet?” Quinlan asked nervously. “I thought the point of the hazing was that it stayed secret?”

“Well, yeah, but we'll just make a note that it's revenge for all his pranks and it's not even a proper lie!”

Quinlan blinked looked over the almost naked figure of his best friend. “We could paint something like 'No more pranks' next to him? And use duct tape to keep him on the wall?”

Obi-Wan let out a whimper, closing his eyes tightly. He had been having a hard time controlling his emotions up to this point. Only the practice of months on the run and some of his nastier missions kept him from reacting. But the idea of someone else seeing him like that? Of likely having to be stuck there until a Knight or Master got him down? (he doubted a junior padawan would be able to do so on their own based on what they were talking about)

It was humiliating.

Quinlan flinched and looked away, but helped them as they untied Obi-Wan. He pulled Obi-Wan out of the chair.

Obi-Wan swayed in place, blood and feeling coming back to his legs. But he didn't have too much time to worry before they were dragging him away. To the padawan dorms.

Quinlan played one of the lookouts the entire way, using several hideaways he knew about to help them evade notice. Several minutes later, they were in the dorms, and there was no one there to witness it as they expected.

Obi-Wan's eyes widened. They really were serious. He hadn't wanted to believe but... They started with tape over his mouth to keep him from yelling. That triggered his fight or flight response and he started struggling immediately.

And one of them pulled out a knife and stabbed the wall. One of the angriest of the group. Angry about everything. This also meant they tended to be the most vicious.

Obi-Wan shrieked and struggled harder until a slash across his arm terrified him into going still.

“I am so tired of you. Just let us get you on that kriffing wall so we can be done. Consider this your warning to never kriffing prank us again and to leave us all alone.”

Obi-Wan nodded frantically, going limp as Quinlan held him to the wall with the Force. Everyone else got right on the duct tape. They didn't cover him with duct tape, but there were multiple stripes to ensure he stayed in place. The padawan with the knife studied him while others painted the wall.

“Are you sure you've learned your lesson, Kenobi? Or will we need to teach it to you again?”

Obi-Wan's eyes widened and he shook his head, tears coming out of his eyes. This had gone far beyond what he was expecting of them. They hadn't seemed this bad. Most hazing didn't get this bad. But then it was usually caught by this point. Only... something about him and Quinlan seemed to bring out the worst in them. He didn't know why. But... at least he got a recording of it. They wouldn't need to teach it to him again because they would be too busy being in trouble.

“I'm not convinced. Maybe you need more lessons.”

Obi-Wan whimpered, closing his eyes tightly. This was bad enough. He didn't need proper injuries. He didn't need any more of this.

“This is too far, Stav. There's no reason to hurt him. We're Jedi, not sadistic monsters.”

Quinlan was quiet, at the other wall, trying to stay unnoticed. He wasn't sure what to do.

Obi-Wan scoffed. They were sadistic monsters, but just not the way they were thinking. Knife work would make this official.

“Oh please. Like we haven't passed lines like this before.”

“I don't know...”

“He deserves it. He'll tell on us, and you know someone will listen to him at some point. Or at least, rumors will start. I think we need to make sure he won't talk.”

“Ah, yes that is a very good point. Maybe don't actually go too hard though, they might not believe this is about pranks if he's too seriously injured.”

“Don't worry. I want to make my mark but I don't want him to die for it.”

Obi-Wan let out a whimper as he stepped closer, squirming, but mostly unable to move. He froze when he felt the tip of the knife press into his stomach, not too deep, but still painful. He started crying from the pain, with no way to escape it.

Quinlan didn't even register the decision made until he was tackling Stav to the ground. He wrestled the knife away and threw it down the hall.

But that was all he could do before the others were onto him, pulling him off. Then they started removing his clothes. Quinlan struggled against them, panicking, but it was too late, the group had him. Even with Stav retrieving his knife.

“I knew you would never make it as one of us. No study group for you, Vos. You'll never make it as a Jedi if you can't study with people smarter than you.”

“What is it with me? Why don't you like me?” Quinlan asked desperately, still fighting back though his clothes were tossed into the pile under Obi-Wan. “Why don't you like Obi-Wan?”

“Because somehow the two of you are well liked and the ones everyone talks about being the faces of the current generation, while we get passed over.”

“I don't know why!” Quinlan protested. “Because you're right! I'm annoying and chaotic and I don't know how I even made it this far.”

“But you are. And it's not fair.”

Quinlan flinched when they punched him. Started beating him up. This was normal, even if the lack of clothes was not. He dropped to the ground and curled up, trying to protect his head as best he could. He was fighting panic, unsure of what to do.

And then they taped his mouth shut, taped him to the wall like they did Obi-Wan, putting him across the hall from Obi-Wan so they had to stare at each other or keep their eyes closed. It was very much uncomfortable.

Quinlan felt humiliated as they conferred on the time and then they put Xepo in the position to tattoo him, on the thigh. He didn't want to know what they were putting there. And then there were the paints and all the other humiliating things that had had happened to Obi-Wan being done to him, with them occasionally giving attention to Obi-Wan.

All the while they kept up a steady line of vitriol about what there was to dislike about both Quinlan and Obi-Wan.

By the tattoo was finished, Quinlan was in tears too. He had avoided the worst of this by going along with everything, by letting them beat him up, by at least pretending to give into their demands. But now... Now he was utterly humiliated and in pain and had something permanent on his body because there were few ways to completely remove a tattoo without going so drastic as to having a skin graft to ensure there was no sign of it.

And then Stav pulled out his knife, utterly delighted. “We have a few minutes before the other padawans start returning, so let's see what I can do...”

Quinlan cried out when he started with the cutting but tried not to react otherwise. Tried not to cry more. Tried not to let it get to him. It hurt.

And part of him thought he might have deserved it for not stepping in sooner. For becoming a coward and letting them jerk him around. He closed his eyes tightly as they finished and cleared away anything that could be used for evidence. They only left the clothes and anything else Obi-Wan and Quinlan might have had on them at the start of all this.

Obi-Wan stared at Quinlan, also crying but a bit concerned for his friend. His friend who had done ever he could to avoid being hurt, to avoid this, had in the end, found his courage and tried to rescue Obi-Wan in a too little, too late gesture.

And they couldn't talk to each other. Tape over their mouths and all. They just had to wait for someone to find them.

Obi-Wan felt Qui-Gon checking in on him in their bond, wondering why he wasn't there for dinner. He sent back feelings of being trapped, needing help, and a vague idea of where he was, a bit too worked up to communicate properly. Those feelings also probably leaked through the bond as Qui-Gon turned a bit panicked.

Yeah, Qui-Gon would be arriving soon. Maybe the Force would be with them and he would get there before the other padawans started returning and saw them? That would be nice. This was humiliating enough, taped to a wall, covered in paint and glitter, in pain from being punched and kicked, plus the knife... and the there was the tattoo... and the lack of clothes.

Obi-Wan closed his eyes tightly as he heard the chattering of padawans approaching them. Time was up. They were about to be discovered. He was not looking forward to this. Many of their agemates were in the dorms.

Most padawans stayed with their masters, though some would stay in the dorms if there were incompatible needs. Some would stay in the dorms on occasion, if they needed say, a higher humidity than most but only occasionally and otherwise could live at their master's level of comfort. Or vice versa, even. It happened.

Some padawans chose to stay in the dorms for no reason besides just wanting that. They tended to be more independent and have a more distant relationship with their masters, but turned out no worse for it. It just seemed weird to others, especially with those who were close with their masters.

Either way, there were still plenty of padawans in the dorms who would know Obi-Wan and Quinlan. And the rumors would be all over the place in no time. Maybe some of them would take pictures. It was going to be rough for the next few months. And Obi-Wan knew he didn't want to talk about what really happened. He doubted Quinlan wanted to either.

Obi-Wan would share with his master what happened, and the Council, and maybe the healers, but he would not tell anyone else. It was too humiliating. He went in looking to save Quinlan from the bullies, and he had plenty of material in that. But he also got far more than he bargained for. Far more than he planned on. He would not talk about it.

There was a gasp. Obi-Wan cringed internally. They were spotted. He kept his breathing steady, and waited for the whispers to start.

Yep, there they were. The unmistakable sounds of pictures being taken. Padawans scolding others for it. Someone wondering if they should get a knight or master. Some laughter, some padawans scolding them for finding this so funny.

Obi-Wan felt the tears begin anew. He couldn't stop them. He hated this. He wanted his master, now. He wanted to be free of this.

“Obi-Wan?”

He relaxed instantly. That was his master. He opened his eyes and looked to Qui-Gon pleadingly. Qui-Gon looked between him and Quinlan for a moment, stunned, then he hurried over. As he carefully removed the tape from the wall, he called for healers and commed Mace. This was too far, even to stop padawans from pranking as the paint on the wall proclaimed.

Obi-Wan fell forward into his masters arms, sobbing before Qui-Gon even removed the tape from his mouth. “Recording in my robes... I... I was recording them, master,” he whispered.

“Okay, I got it padawan, it's okay.” Qui-Gon wrapped his cloak around Obi-Wan.

Obi-Wan clung to the cloak with numb fingers, watching his master get Quinlan down. Quinlan, unusually, didn't cling, but pulled away to curl up on his own, ignoring everyone around him.

Qui-Gon found his robes and draped them over Quinlan then searched Obi-Wan's for the recording. He saw that it was still recording, and stopped it. He winced when he saw that it was several hours long. He started playing it just to make sure it had all recorded and saved. And it had. He quickly stopped it. He didn't think he could handle knowing anything about how this had happened to his padawan.

By the time Qui-Gon returned to look over Obi-Wan, Mace was pushing through the crowd of padawans, the healers right behind him.

Mace looked over the wall and the padawans and frowned. Nothing ever got Quinlan down, and he was crying. Before he could go to the padawan, though, Qui-Gon pressed a recorder into his hand. Not a comm or anything else, something specifically meant to record and play back only.

“What is this?” Mace asked Qui-Gon.

“I believe Obi-Wan managed to record the entire thing.”

Mace nodded shortly, pleased to have some evidence to follow to figure out what happened. Then he stepped over to Quinlan. He knelt down next to the padawan and placed his hand on Quinlan's shoulder.

“Quinlan, Tholme will meet us at the Healing Halls. Can you let the healers take a look at you?”

Quinlan wordlessly uncurled and let the healers check him over, clutching Mace's hand gratefully when it was offered.

Qui-Gon was holding on to Obi-Wan while the healers took a look. They might be okay physically... but it was clear there was definitely going to be something to deal with mentally. But they would have support.

.

Quinlan avoided Obi-Wan, and kept to himself. He barely talked to anyone besides Master Tholme, sat in silence with the mind healer, and quietly answered questions from those investigating the incident. He didn't talk to classmates, to old friends. He was just quiet and withdrawn in a way that not even Tholme had seen before.

He ended up getting some minor punishment in the form of essays and assisting in the creche for his part in what happened to Obi-Wan, but he got off lightly on account of what happened when he did interfere.

Obi-Wan was also quiet, but that wasn't as unusual. He tended to be on the quieter side when injured. He was healing nicely, and he and Qui-Gon were looking into options to cover up Satine's name, since they hadn't even dated. He just wasn't sure where he stood with Quinlan, and Quinlan's words hurt. He also knew he hurt Quinlan a lot.

He spent a lot of time in their favorite meditation room, keeping Kiffu's sky up. Sometimes he pulled up other night skies they liked to see, but mostly, he kept it on Kiffu's because he missed Quinlan and didn't know how to fix this.

Quinlan wandered into the meditation room, almost two months later and froze when he saw Obi-Wan. He did not want to see Obi-Wan right now. He was still avoiding his friend and had planned to do so indefinitely. But Obi-Wan wasn't meditating, or doing anything. He was just quietly staring at the night sky he had set. Quinlan looked up. Kiffu. Obi-Wan's favorite was actually a tie between Alderaan and Glee Anselm. Kiffu wasn't his favorite.

He bit his lip, looking at his friend. His friend he hurt and may have ruined all chances of friendship with. His friend who was in their favorite mediation room with Quinlan's favorite night sky, not his own.

Another moment of hesitation, and Quinlan stepped into the room, slowly. He walked over to where Obi-Wan was and laid two feet away, so that Obi-Wan had space. He stared at the ceiling, relaxing a bit at the familiar constellations, the stories springing to mind immediately.

“Quin?” Obi-Wan whispered.

Quinlan felt like he might cry. Obi-Wan was still using his nickname. “Yeah, Obi?”

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean anything I said. I... I knew what they were doing and I was trying to get them to dig themselves in deeper. I shouldn't have said any of that. It wasn't fair and you didn't know what I was doing.”

“You might have started out with that, but you were also lashing out.” Quinlan couldn't pull his gaze away from the night sky. “Because I was hurting you. And I don't know how I can ever apologize enough, or make up enough for what I said and what I did. You were right. I was being a kriffing coward. I shouldn't have let them get to me. I should've said something to Master Tholme about every study group I checked out having rules for joining.”

Obi-Wan was quiet for a moment. “Did you actually mean those things? That I'm a crybaby and don't deserve to be a Jedi?”

“No, of course not. Those were just things they were using to try to get me to stop being friends with you. And I didn't act the way I did for them, mostly. Yeah... they were getting to me and I had already heard just about everything you said from them. But I was also trying to protect you. I thought if I pretended we weren't friends they wouldn't target you or make me do anything to you. I thought that if I played along they would leave you alone afterwards but they just kept going.” Quinlan angrily swiped at the tears leaking out of his eyes. He was getting tired of crying.

“Okay. I can believe that. You always try to protect everyone. That's what makes you a good Shadow. I... kind of meant that part though. Shadows aren't like normal Jedi, and a lot of others think they're not real Jedi. I don't believe it. But I do know you. And I know how you struggle sometimes with negative feelings, and with being alone. And I worry about you because I know one of your greatest fears is Falling.” Obi-Wan was watching Quinlan now.

“I know that if you come even close to Falling you'll hate yourself and try to do everything not to... but that will only make things worse. But I would normally never say anything about it 'cause being a Shadow is so important to you, and who you are.”

Quinlan felt the tears start pouring down, hot, across his face. “Oh... Not a judgement call, but a... you get worried about me like Tholme does thing. That... that makes a lot of sense. Only they told me the things and meant it so... it was like you were confirming them. My best friend. And you said I was no clingy and ignored boundaries. I don't mean to...” He tried to wipe away the tears, but they were flowing too fast, too many.

Obi-Wan winced, inching closer. “I know. I'm used to it and you know I'm no good at speaking up about my boundaries. I'll say something once and then never again because I don't want to nag. And most of the time it's fine. I was just repeating things others say, and it's not like they ever tell you it's a boundary. Just because you assume the boundary is further than it is doesn't mean you ignore them and I know that if I desperately need space you'll give it to me.”

Quinlan nodded, still unable to look at Obi-Wan. “Why are you reassuring me? I don't... I don't deserve any comfort after what I did to you, after what I said to you. After... Everything. I should've been punished worse. I should've.... I should've gotten worse.”

“Oh, Quin.” Obi-Wan pulled Quinlan into a hug without warning. “I saw the bruises and I got worried. I figured out about the hazing, and decide the best way to get them in trouble was to record it. I didn't expect it to go so far, I didn't expect to have to play along so far, or for playing along to turn to real rather than pretend. I am so sorry, Quin, I didn't want you to hurt more, and instead both of us got hurt.”

Quinlan stiffened, refusing to accept comfort no matter how much he wanted to. “Oh. You... were trying to protect me? You put yourself in that position on purpose? ...that explains a lot. Like how you got that recording. Huh.”

“Quin... I don't blame you. It hurt, but I'd like to get past this, please? Can... can you explain what I've done? What's the problem with Mandalore and Satine, who I never dated and never had feelings for, by the way I... I don't understand?”

That got Quinlan to move. He turned and hugged Obi-Wan tightly, trying to not to cry even more. “I was just being dumb. It... You were on that mission for like eight months. With most of that being with only Satine for company. Of course you didn't have much to talk about when you first came back, when you were trying to settle back into Temple life. I... I was jealous. That you liked her so much. And it took my thoughts somewhere it shouldn't have. I'm really really sorry. But Obi? Why aren't you asking about everything else? Why aren't you asking for reassurance?”

“I know you didn't mean it. I believe you when you say you were trying to protect me. You've comforted me about not being a crybaby, about how just because how I became a padawan was unusual didn't mean I was unwanted. That's how you knew those would hurt me but it's been nearly two months. I've had time to think. If you had just been pretending, just being my friend out of pity... there are so many memories together we wouldn't have.” Obi-Wan was hugging his friend as tightly as he dared, throughly enjoying having his best friend here with him for the first time in a long time.

Quinlan swallowed and decided to just let himself cry. Obi-Wan started rocking him though he started crying as well. It took them several minutes before either were ready to talk.

At that point, they moved to cuddling, leaning against the cushions and looking at the 'sky' when they weren't looking at each other.

“Obes... where does this leave us? That whole thing... it was humiliating, everyone knows about it. They don't know everything, but they know enough, and I can't always hide the tattoo...”

“I don't know. Qui-Gon and I are looking into tattoo cover ups for me. Maybe that's an option. What did they do for you?”

“Just... something similar to what they had in Xepo do to you. I can't believe how much trouble he got in for that.”

“Me either... I can't believe half the group outright got expelled from the Order. I knew that we don't exactly tolerate such behavior but we do usually believe in second chances... I wonder what they said that made that the best option.”

“Me too... But I'm glad they're gone. The others are keeping to themselves because they got such harsh punishments. And the study groups have been torn apart, looking for the rules they have about joining. I don't know what they're going to do to make it easier for senior padawans to study and make sure we know the material now, but at least they're fixing the problem. And Lumi is some of my classes, and she volunteered to help me out.”

“That's good. I'm glad that we don't have to worry about them anymore.” Obi-Wan snuggled in. “And I really missed cuddling with you, you know. We didn't do much of it after I got back from Mandalore, and then the... whole hazing happened and now we're here.”

“You did miss me being clingy?” Quinlan asked. “You don't mind me being clingy?”

“Best part, honestly,” Obi-Wan admitted. “It means I don't need to ask for cuddling. I don't feel so... childish for wanting to cuddle when you're always clingy. I know you need more touch than most but it's still... nice.”

Quinlan smiled. “Then you get all the cuddles. Unless you say no. Um. In the future, if you're okay saying why, it helps to listen to people saying no or to stop if they say why. Otherwise it doesn't quite click what's going on, doesn't feel... firm enough.”

“Okay. Got it.” Obi-Wan rested his head on Quinlan's chest, sighing happily. Then he paused. “Quin... why were you jealous when you thought I was dating Satine?”

Quinlan groaned. “I'd rather not talk about it? It was dumb. I was dumb. Can we move on? We just got to being friends again.”

“No. We're not going to leave anything unsaid. After what happened we need to sort everything out if we have any chance of fully being able to resume our friendship, and we need each other with everyone either pitying us or laughing at us.”

Quinlan slumped back, staring up at the sky, trying to hide his embarrassment.

“Wait. You were jealous of me dating Satine... Quin? Do you like me?” Obi-Wan was a bit annoyed with himself for not making the connection sooner.

Quinlan just nodded mutely, unable to actually voice his feelings. He resisted the urge to pull away. That would just make things worse, he thought.

He was not prepared for Obi-Wan to kiss him.