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" This won't do... Hm. " Shu sighed as he crossed out another idea. No matter what he did, the choreography for the new dance would not come to him. It was as if something was missing, a crucial element that would make the dance complete... or someone.
No, it would have to be a solo work. As much as he wished for his partner's company, he knew Mika could not come on such short notice, let alone have enough time to practice with him. He'd gotten too used to Mika's presence, to the point where every move he thought of included another individual. It was embarrassing, frankly, and yet he knew he was quite behind on his deadline so something would need to be devised, and quickly.
As if aware of Shu's inner turmoil, Mika picked the worst time possible to call him. Or perhaps the best? Shu wouldn't deny the content he felt upon hearing his partner's voice, not that he would ever admit so out loud.
" Oshi-san! How's yer dance goin'? "
Straight to the point, huh. Shu sincerely hoped Leo or Izumi hadn't gossiped about his inadequacies behind his back. " A hello would have been appreciated. ''
" Ngh? But we talked 'n the mornin'...? 'sides, I'm reaaally worried 'bout ya! 'Nd if we start talkin' normally y'ere gonna distract me with yer silky voice 'nd make me forget 'bout makin' sure ya take breaks! "
" My what voice...? Regardless, I am in peak physical condition, you have nothing to fret over. " A lie, but a small one. Mika wouldn't find out about his lack of sleep or missed lunches as long as Mademoiselle didn't bring it up next time they were in Japan. " In fact, it is I who should chastise you. Did you not skip breakfast today? Really, Kagehira, worrying about me when you can't even take care of yourself! "
" Eh? Howdya even know 'bout that...? Nevermind, yer dodgin' the subject! "
" I am not! I am simply concerned, just as you purport to be! "
" W-Well then we're both concerned! So ya should let m' come over so I can take 'f ya and ya can watch over me! "
" ...What? ''
Mika... Coming to him. It was a topic that had come up many times before, but circumstances made it hard for either of them to arrange an appropriate time. If Mika were to come when Shu felt so... unprepared, would he approve of Shu's living conditions? The new environment? If Mika were to visit, Shu would want everything to be perfect for him to have the incentive to stay, but without time to prepare and plan everything out, would it truly be a satisfactory experience?
" Um, Oshi-san...? Ya kinda went quiet on me, do ya hate th' idea of me comin' that much? "
" Non! I... I was simply surprised, that is all. Kagehira, you cannot just drop an offer of that magnitude into a casual conversation and expect a coherent response! "
" Hehe, sorry~ " He did not sound sorry at all, but Shu couldn't find it in him to get mad. " So if I got 't right, you'd... want me there? "
" I... "
Shu did not like being put on the spot. What was the thinnest line possible between voicing his disturbingly embarrassing desires and acceptable formality? Mika did not need to be privy to all of his domestic fantasies, but he also knew if he didn't sound too enthused the boy would absolutely take it personally and think that he did something wrong. What a dilemma.
" Oshi-san... If ye're really uncomfortable ya don't have t' say yes. "
" That is not it... How should I put this... " Shu took a deep breath. Mika's heard him admit to enough embarrassment already, one more confession wouldn't sully the boy's opinion of him. " I... would love you here. Your presence by my side makes me content. The only concerns I have are of being an adequate host as I am ill-prepared for your arrival. I worry about disappointing you and scaring you away, because... I genuinely would not know what to do were I to make the idea of eventually living with me become displeasurable and unappealing to you. All of my future visions involve you by my side and I... would not know what to do were that fantasy to shatter. "
The only response Shu got was the static of his phone that was trembling in his hands. Had he done it? Truly and irrevocably scared Mika of? " ....Kagehira? Are you still... there? "
" Oshi-san. ''
Mika didn't sound upset, but he also didn't sound happy. There was no emotion in the boy's voice, and the fact worried Shu.
" ...Yes? "
" Oshi-san, y'ere... such an idiot! "
Ah, so he had done it then. He knew he should not have spoken at all, lest his affections be misconstrued-
" Oshi-san! Stop spiralin' s'not what I meant! Ye're an idiot for thinkin' m'gonna care 'bout ya bein' a good host or whether ye're prepared or not! S'not like I'm gonna move there fer the country, I just wanna be by yer side! No matter where that is! Ya gotta be an idiot fer not havin' realized that! "
As shameful as it was to admit, Shu had not exactly... thought of that. This was the same boy who proudly declared that he'd gladly spend every moment by Shu's side, to feel what he feels... Becoming human did not make his unwavering loyalty dissipate, it seems.
" Kagehira... Are you saying that because you still see me as a God of sorts, or is that truly how you feel? ''
" S'not that, I promise... A doll would listen t' its master, but could never love him... I don't want that, ya know? I wanna love ya properly, a-as a human, so if that scares ya then I'd get, but... s'not mindless obsession I have with ya. "
Love, of course. To think that for however long Shu has pondered why Mika would choose to remain by his side, the answer had been so obvious. It was always there, wasn't it? To think, that he'd somehow missed the most human emotion of all.
" Kagehira. "
" Y-Yes? "
" Don't start getting shy now, it is unbecoming after such a bold proclamation. And truth be told, I... share the same sentiment as you. And if you were to come here, it would not be... wholly unpleasant to experience that with you. "
" W-Wait, ya mean...? "
" Yes Kagehira, I love you as well. Now, it seems that our conversation has gone on for longer than expected, so I'd advise you to focus on packing if you wish to be here by the time of my show. "
" O-Oh, right! Hehe, Oshi-san, m'so happy~ M'gonna kiss ya when I get there! "
What an embarrassing declaration, and yet... Shu couldn't help his smile. It wasn't as though the reciprocation of his feelings made all his worries dissipate, but... Mika's presence really did help him calm down. Perhaps he wasn't the best when it came to the subject of love, but who better to learn it with than the one he'd called his partner in every sense but one?