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It was over. It was finally over. He couldn’t believe it.
He didn’t believe it. There’s no way it really ended like this. There was no closure. He still felt a phantom of the hard steps pressing into his back. That’s where he’d taken his final breath; on some insignificant stairs in an insignificant abandoned warehouse on an insignificant day.
It all felt wrong. He was so, so important; to the world and so many people. How could it all crumble in such a pathetic way? He couldn’t believe it. He didn’t want to.
He was standing above his own corpse. His body was still laying on these stairs, lifeless eyes still staring up at the ceiling in shock. Light wasn’t sure if he was a ghost now or if this was a weird type of hallucination or something along those lines that his brain came up with in his dying moments.
When he died, Light would’ve sworn that he saw L standing in front of him. He was so sure that he saw him. Light’s ghost, or soul, or whatever he became how, was standing right were his vision of L had stood.
Fitting. He took L’s place in death, just as he did during his life.
He felt everything and nothing; all at once. He couldn’t really describe it if someone asked him to.
After a while, he tore his gaze away from his old body. He began slowly, hesitantly walking down the stairs again. Just as he’d reached the ground floor, the door to the warehouse was opened.
Members of the Task Force walked in. They were looking for him, it was obvious. He’d fled in vain. They walked right through him, as though they couldn’t see him to look at his corpse. He hurried to get out.
He didn’t want to hear whatever they had to say about him now. He started running again, like he had moments before his death. He didn’t know where he was running; he had no goal in mind.
As he was running, he noticed that he didn’t get out of breath, no matter how long he ran. In fact, he wasn’t breathing at all. Obviously, he was dead; what ghost would need oxygen?
Eventually, he slowed down. He was still walking and he still didn’t have a destination in mind. It was weird. Everything around him felt weird; yet the only thing that truly changed was him.
At some point, he started to recognize the streets he was on again. He’d ended up in Tokyo, right in front of the old HQ building that L had built for the case. He laughed to himself.
Light didn’t know how to feel. He walked towards the entrance slowly. He half expected not being able to enter the building, as the door was closed, but oddly enough he found himself able to just walk through the door.
He really did end up a ghost. It was a weird feeling. He didn’t know how to feel about this.
Light shook his head and decided to focus on the situation at hand. He wanted to look around the building, he wanted to see what exactly had changed since the last time he’d been there.
He expected the building to be empty, and from the perspective of most people, it was. However, when Light reached the floor he used to live in when he was chained to L, he was met with a sight he never would’ve expected.
It was hard to describe, but it was simultaneously like the room was empty and dark, but he could also very clearly see that the lights were on and that L was sitting at his old desk typing away at his laptop that looked both on and off. It was like someone had put two pictures above one another, both with half opacity. He didn’t know how else to describe what it looked like.
“Hello?” He asked into the room. He didn’t know if what he saw there was actually L. He hoped it was, just as much as he hoped it wasn’t. Maybe this was a hallucination? Maybe he was in a coma and this all wasn’t real? Maybe-
“Hm?” L’s voice answered. L himself didn’t move or turn to look at the intruder. Light wouldn’t say he felt ignored, but he very much did.
“It’s been a while,” Light said. He walked towards L. If he was still breathing, it would’ve been fairly uneven in this moment. If he still had a heartbeat, it would’ve been beating fast.
After a few moments of Light silently standing next to L, with neither of them saying anything, L eventually stopped typing. Light didn’t know what it was that L had been working on.
“So, you’re dead, now? Huh,” L murmured. More to himself than really to Light. “You’re right, it has been a while. I have to say, it was entertaining to watch your descend into madness.”
Light blinked twice. “What are you talking about? I haven’t gone mad!” He wasn’t as enraged as he wanted to be, but he wanted to seem like he was. He didn’t know why. Maybe it was his pride.
“I guess that’s subjective. I’m no psychologist, so I couldn’t say for certain, but honestly… You are very different than how I used to know you.” Light felt like he had found peace now, hearing L’s voice. Light wasn’t listening to the words, just L’s voice- the same old vaguely monotone, yet soothing voice.
“Maybe,” Light replied, forgetting to hide how unbothered he really was by L’s previous comment.
Never in a million years would he admit it, but he hadn’t been this happy in years. Probably since L’s death. He had missed him so, so much. It was ridiculous. He shouldn’t have missed L at all, yet he did. He had felt as though life had lost its meaning without him. He had felt as though he himself had lost his meaning, his purpose.
L noticed the slight smile on Light’s face. Ghosts could do many things living humans can’t, but they are still unable to read someone’s mind. However, L had a sneaking suspicion that he knew why Light was smiling.
“It really has been a long time. How do you feel now that you’re dead?” L asked. He didn’t know why he asked. He wanted to keep the conversation going, yet couldn’t think of anything meaningful to say. He’d gotten rusty, it had been years since he really talked to anyone.
Light’s smile didn’t waver. “Odd, honestly. I don’t know. It’s weird not to breathe and not to have a heartbeat. I’ll hopefully get used to this soon.”
“That’s understandable. I found that weird as well, when I died.” L wasn’t looking at Light as he spoke, he was staring out of the window. It had started to rain about half an hour ago; the window was already littered with raindrops.
“It’s all so empty,” Light said. “You’re the only person- or I guess, ghost- I’ve encountered who could see or hear me at all.” Light didn’t feel lonely, but he was worried that eventually he would, if there was no one else around. However, he didn’t really worry about that. He had L now. Back when he was alive and had everyone else around him, they didn’t matter; only L did. So why would they matter now?
“Most ghosts move on from this plane quickly. Very few actually stay for a meaningful amount of time after their deaths. The ones who do stay, usually only want to tie up some loose ends.” L’s answer sounded like one from a textbook, almost as if he’d rehearsed this multiple times.
Light took a few seconds before he replied. “What exactly do you mean by move on?”
“I don’t have personal experience with this, as I obviously haven’t done it, but it just means going to MU. It’s the permanent place for us. I don’t know what it’s like, as ghosts who move on to MU can’t return to this world.” L’s voice almost sounded sad. Light wasn’t sure, it had been so long since he last heard it.
“Why are you still here? Where is Watari? Do you know if my dad moved on?” Light asked question after question. “How does one move on?”
“I don’t know why I’m still here. Maybe this is the reason, maybe I was waiting for you. I don’t know. It just didn’t feel right to leave.” L paused before he continued, “Watari and your father have both moved on. Watari left on the same day, your father the day after his passing. As for how to do it,” L was thinking. “That’s a good question, it appears as if one just has to be certain that that’s what they want.”
“What exactly is this MU you’re talking about?”
L laughed. Light felt like he just got a taste of heaven. “How would I know? As I said, I haven’t been there, Light.”
“Yes, sorry, you did say that.” Light sat down on the bed in the middle of the room. It was the one they used to share. “What do you think it’s like?”
“Well, MU meanings nothingness, so I assume it would be like a dreamless sleep you never wake up from? That or maybe you’d be floating in some kind of void. Maybe like a meditative state?” L’s answer sounded still a bit amused. Light was more curious than L had expected. He didn’t mind answering his questions.
“I don’t want to go there. Why would anyone want that? It sounds incredibly boring.”
“Maybe,” L almost hummed, “but it could also be like a paradise. My answer was just a speculation, I can’t tell you for sure. I don’t know it either.” L turned on his chair to face Light. “You know, I haven’t had a conversation in years. You’re the first other ghost I’ve seen who didn’t leave almost immediately.”
“That sounds lonely.”
“Oh, it was. That’s why I kept following the Kira case, it was a source of entertainment to me.”
Light laughed. “It got really boring after your death.”
“Obviously,” L joked, “I’m the only reason it was ever interesting.”
Light laughed at the joke, but internally he actually agreed. L’s death was the sole reason that Light lost interest. Sure, that didn’t make him stop, but still.
For a bit, they were both sitting together in silence, when eventually L asked, “Light, do you want to explore the world of Nothingness together?”
Light knew fully well that L didn’t mean this as a love confession, but that’s still exactly how it felt like. Light smiled and grabbed L’s hand. “There’s no one else I’d rather do that with.”
L gave Light a half-smile in return.
At that moment, both of them started to feel sort of weightless and the room they were in was starting to blue around them. The only thing they could still feel was the other’s hand they were still holding.
After what felt like both an eternity and instant, they found themselves in… The exact same room they were just a moment ago.
“What just happened?” Light asked, bewildered. He was still holding onto L’s hand as it was a life line.
L shrugged.
Light noticed something. The room was different. Previously, it had looked both dark and bright, both empty and not; now it only looked bright and not empty. It was like the glitch was patched, like the weird filter was removed. Light didn’t say anything, but he was certain that L could tell that he had something on his mind.
The room’s door opened. Watari walked in. “Hello, L. I’m glad to see you’ve finally moved on.” Watari greeted L happily. He only acknowledged Light with a simple nod. Light understood the reaction, he nodded back.
“Watari, why does this room look the same as in… the normal world? If one can call it that,” L sounded puzzled. Light could only agree. They both didn’t have any particular expectations about what this MU would be like, but they hadn’t expected… it to be the exact same?
“This world is almost like a replika of the world of the living. It’s far bigger and the societal structures are different, as near every human who’s ever lived is in this realm.” Watari explained. Both L and Light found it almost uncanny to hear his voice again after such a long time. L smiled, almost subconsciously.
Light couldn’t help, but feel happy for him. It was unusual for him, to feel happy for others. But he didn’t mind; this was L after all. He had missed him so much, he could allow himself to feel something unusual when it came to L.
As Light was lost in thought, he came to a realization. According to what Watari just said, it would mean- his father would also be somewhere in this realm. Light felt a weight drop off his shoulders as he realized that this meant he could make things right with him again! Light could only hope that his father would forgive him for the things he did as Kira. But still, Light didn’t regret his actions. He felt oddly content; more than he would’ve expected to feel after dying.