Chapter Text
Red didn’t really care to get in between his … ‘cousin’s’ love life. It didn’t involve him, so why should he intrude?
But MY GOD. It is so sickening to see Blue and the neighbour tip toe around each other as if they’re not heavily smitten with each other. It’s frustrating, honestly. He was starting to feel bad for the pair.
The way they spoke so naturally, they both bounced off each other’s energy as if someone had duplicated Blue’s passion and formed it into a human. It was crazy to see, but yet every chance they had to obviously confess, one of them would back out. Either Y/N suddenly had left the tap on or Blue remembered a bet he needs to suddenly win. Red saw it all and he was tired of their playing. They’d laugh as if they were old friends. They’d go on adventures to go find those ‘cryptic’ things that Blue is adamant are real and whenever Y/N came up in conversation, Blue suddenly gets all hyped up and very eager to participate. Yet, Blue is too scared to make a move.
That’s not even to start with Y/N, a brilliant individual with a brilliant mind; apparently not brilliant enough because why the hell has it taken them so long to muster up any damn courage? They were friendly, nice and pretty damn helpful. So, why on earth are humans so complex? Hm, looks like Red’s gonna have to fix things. Like he always, constantly has to. Hmph..
“Blue, open up. I’ve got to talk to you.” He gruffed after knocking on the door that lead to Blue’s room. A little bit of shuffling was heard and after a moment, the door swung open with great intensity. Blue stood, a curious look on his face,
“What’s up?”
Red sighed heavily before forcing Blue back into the room slightly and closing the door behind him as he entered. He at least wanted to spare Blue’s pride because this conversation was going to be embarrassing for both of them.
“Okay, so. What do you think of Y/N?” Red crossed his arms, narrowing his eyes sternly at the skeleton before him. Blue blinked in response… what?
“Uh, they’re great. I really love to hang out with them.” Red immediately noticed the change in tone, he sounded happier just by speaking about them. Gross, this dude was so oblivious.
“You seriously think they’re just great?” He questioned. Blue’s face contorted a little before realisation dawned on him. A mighty blush covered Blue’s face, before frantically shaking his head.
“No no! They’re a wonderful friend, nothing more..!” He waved his hands in a immediate denial. Shut down, of course. Red expected nothing more, Blue never really liked to talk about his emotions. Especially very sensitive ones such as romance. But Red knew this goofy gumdrop better than anyone in this house… maybe besides Stretch of course.
“It’s not my place to pry, but I heard Y/N has the hots for you.”
“And where, pray tell did you learn that information?” Blue huffed, he wasn’t buying Red’s bs. It wasn’t funny either. There is no way Y/N ‘had the hots’ for him, not Y/N.
“Are you kidding me, Blue!? The way they always make that annoying little laughing noise whenever they’re around you. They laugh at our puns but never like that! Not to mention the way they squirm to be partnered with you in every single game we play.” Red listed off. His ‘cousin’ gave him a rather unimpressed look, flustered don’t get me wrong, very unimpressed.
“And these are just the few examples I can think of the top of my head! Blue is it so fucking hard to imagine?” He threw his hands out exaggeratedly.
“Come on, now. This isn’t funny! I don’t know who you think you are trying to pry on Y/N and I’s.. friendship. But,-“
“Blue, if you don’t ask them out I will, god damn it!”
…
Silence fell upon the two.
Fuck, now Red had truly thrown himself into the mix. This is what happens when you say shit before thinking. Well done, Red. Everyone, let’s give a round of applause for the moron right here.
The cyan themed monster stood with a look of.. almost betrayal on his face? His oddly hurt confusion quickly transformed into heated anger.
“Y-you can’t do that! Y/N and I-“
“And why not!? You clearly don’t care about them enough to ask them-“ Red was just stalling, he knew they were getting loud and that was apart of his wonderful and definitely not made up on the spot plan.
“Because there is no way Y/N will want to be with a skeleton as big of a let down as me!” Blue’s voice cracked out slightly louder than he intended, being more of a yell than a slightly raised voice.
Silence fell again.
Bingo.
“Oh, yikes uhh.. I did not sign up for emotional intimacy.” Red was suddenly put on the spot, scratching his neck awkwardly. Blue’s anger hadn’t faded, but now his face was a flushed turquoise.
“Get out of my room, Red.” He scowled slightly, his voice unusually low. Red tsk’ed irately but slammed the door behind him. Oh but, now he had some information.
Blue didn’t think he was good enough for Y/N, Red knew that Blue had always hated being honest about his emotions; but he could use this information to finally get these two moronic mules to cut it out with the whole ‘longingly-stare-from-across-the-room-only-to-look-away-last-second’ act.
Maybe it was because he liked drama, or maybe he cared for Blue; Red was going to be a good friend and land Blue a date with the pretty bum next door.
Because if not, he’d kneel over and die from their cringe asses.