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He stares at the offending piece of paper.
It is an envelope, with a small sticker heart on it. The envelope is pastel pink, and there is no name on it, no record of who left it.
Bakugou knows what it is. He scowls.
It must be a damn death threat from fucking Deku.
The idiot must finally be showing his true colors. See, after all this time, Bakugou is right. Deku really was being arrogant and has been looking down on him all this time.
He throws it in the nearest trash can without even looking at it, stewing. He’s going to kill that nerd. He should probably hide Deku’s body in--
A girl runs past him.
Now, Bakugou is not dense.
Not at all.
He can tell when someone is crying.
...But he just doesn’t care who or why. He doesn’t spare the random chick a second thought, opting to think about murdering Deku instead.
Right, so he’ll hide Deku’s body in…
<3
Two envelopes come tumbling out of his locker.
Deku sent two this time?
The nerd is getting pretty gutsy. Bakugou hates it.
The last time he tried to beat Deku up the nerd had denied all claims of ever sending him death threats.
“Oi, was it you who sent me those death threats in the pink envelopes, Deku?”
“Um… Kaachan… Th-- That sounds more like yo-- you’re describing a love letter than a death th-- threat?”
“DON’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO DEKU!”
“But… I wasn’t telling you what to do--?”
“STOP TELLING ME WHAT TO DO AND BE QUIET!”
“Um-- Kaachan-- I--"
“YOU WERE ALWAYS SO ARROGANT, THINKING YOU WERE BETTER THAN ME.”
“...Am I the only one who sees the irony here?”
<3
There are seven death threats that come tumbling out of Bakugou Katsuki’s locker.
Most of them are various shades of pink or red, and are covered in hearts.
He doesn’t think they’re death threats anymore.
In fact, they must be…
Challenges.
Someone is asking him to fight, but Bakugou has been ignoring them. He curses. He probably seems like a coward now, and if there’s one thing he is not, it's a coward. He is Bakugou Katsuki after all.
He angrily tears the letters open, scanning the letter inside equally as angry. It reads:
I really like you… Can we go out?
Bakugou blinks. A little weird way of phrasing it, but what the fuck ever. They didn’t even give him a time, just their name. If they want to fight, why didn’t they give him a goddamn time and a place, damnit.
He looks at the other letter he got.
Meet me on the rooftop during lunch tomorrow, I have something to tell you.
Bakugou scowls. Yeah, no way. Eating lunch is important, and they’re just dumb if they asked him to inconvenience himself and fight them during lunch. He moves on to the last one.
I know you threw away the first note I sent… And I had to take a little time to gather up the courage to send you another note… But, I won’t give up so easily! Can you see me at the boba shop that just opened after school?
Now there’s a fight Bakugou can fucking do.
<3
When he gets there, there’s some delinquent looking kids ganging up on a girl from… UA. Fucking hell.
He looks down at the letter, and looks back up at the bullies several times.
So those punks sent him a challenge and have the nerve to harass another UA student? He doesn’t know how they got even remotely close to his locker, let alone the gates of UA, but he’ll ignore it for now in favor of a fight. Honestly, it seems pretty much impossible. He’ll have to ask them how they did it. Aggressively ask them, of course.
Jeez, that UA girl is just letting herself get walked over. What a doormat. He rolls his eyes. Sometimes people are just useless.
“Oi. Are you the fuckers who challenged me?” He approaches them.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
Bakugou pulls out the letter, and shoves it to the delinquent’s leader. She lets out a soft grunt from the force of it.
The girl looks at it, then looks back at the other UA girl, who looks mortified for some reason. “Isn’t this you..?” The leader asks the UA chick.
UA girl shakes her head rapidly, face looking more and more red by the second.
Holding the note, the delinquent leader spins back around on Bakugou, saying, “It wasn’t us who asked to take you out on a date, you dense idiot. Honestly, I was making fun of that UA girl over there, but I gotta step up for her, ‘coz you’re blind apparently. These levels of obliviousness only exist when someones pretending they don’t get what’s going on, and that’s not cool, jerk. We’re not in some shoujo manga. Stop being an asshole.”
Wait... Date--?
Wait.
Did. This. Wannabe. Bitch. Just. Call. Him. An. Idiot? Jerk? Asshole?
“You wanna die, fucker?” Bakugou cackles madly, sparks already igniting in his palms.
“Like you could even kill us. Do you want to get arrested, future hero?” Upon seeing Bakugou’s explosions only getting bigger and him only getting closer, she changes her tune. ”Holy hell wait a minute.”
The whole group’s cries for their mothers can be heard several streets down by Kamui Woods, who decides he really does not have the energy to deal with whatever villain is making some civilians scream. He quietly retreats and wishes them good luck and goodbye, instead choosing to ponder over what flavor of ice cream he’s going to have for dinner.
“Not even worth my time.” Bakugou mutters, once the harassers-turned-good-guys-turned-name-callers have all gone silent. Whether they’re dead or have just passed out, Bakugou doesn’t care. They should have been prepared from the very moment they planned to challenge him.
Admittedly, it had been pretty nice to bash their sorry skulls in though.
He storms off, notions of dates forgotten and leaving not one, but two love-struck people in his wake.
Yes. Two.
See, the girl from UA realized that Bakugou was kind of violent and maybe was not a good person to have a crush on, so she decided to respect him as an individual because of fear and hey, he’s hot. She instead spots the guy working a part time job at the boba shop and falls in love with him right on the spot.
On the other hand, the guy working at the part time boba shop saw Bakugou practically murder those people, and had already seen him multiple times on some interviews and when watching the sports festival. Honestly, he thought Bakugou was kind of a jerk. Except, when you’re hot you get excused. So the part timer at the boba shop fell in love with Bakugou.
Then, through the eyes of the almost-murdered delinquent leader who was beaten the most... Maybe it was the adrenaline, maybe it was a newfound admiration of his fighting. With hearts in her eyes, she muttered faintly, “His obliviousness… is completely and totally realistic…”
<3
There are sixteen letters the next time he checks, yes he counts them, and he decides that he won’t even bother anymore. The last time he’d actually followed whatever a letter said, the fight was boring and a waste of time, and doing literally anything else probably would’ve been a better use of his time.
Something catches his eyes though, a paper that is not in a pink or rainbow or some random pastel colored envelope. It’s just a piece of paper. He reads it. It’s a tutoring request from someone, and he figures he might as well. They say they’re willing to pay, and quite frankly it seems a little much, but hey, he’s willing to take advantage of whatever poor person scams themselves. Oh well, he’s the motherfucking best of the best, why wouldn’t anyone want him to tutor them?
After that, several other tutoring requests pour into his locker, but the fighting challenges don’t cease. In fact, he got more and more every day.
When he is back at home and starts cooking dinner, he hears from the news on the TV in the living room...
“Breaking news! The UA grade average has risen from 87% to 95% A’s in midterms this year! We have an interview with the principal of UA to hopefully tell us what he’s done to get such amazing rates! Hi Nedzu! What are your secrets to success?”
Huh, that’s weird, Bakugou shrugs it off. He gets distracted and doesn’t hear Nedzu’s response.
“Bakugou. Just Bakugou.”
<3
Among fighting challenges and tutoring requests, he’s started to get a lot of chocolates. Someone even left him a hand warmer the other day with a note saying that he “looked cold.”
Bakugou blanches.
There is an entire fucking basket of fruits, arranged in an obviously purposeful manner, on the ground next to his locker.
He steps around it cautiously, but spots his name on it.
Why did he get a whole fruit basket? Who the heck is giving him these things? He just carefully walks around it, ignoring it.
He knows what’s going on.
Someone is trying to kill him with poison.
He won’t fall for it.
<3
“Bakugou Katsuki, please report to the principal’s office.”
“OHHHH BAKUGOU’S IN TROUBLE.”
“What’d you do this time, Blasty. Oooooooooohhhhh.”
“Shut the fuck up, extras.” He annoyedly walks out, wondering what he could’ve done to get him called out, in the middle of class no less. He tended to accidentally-- totally accidentally-- make people extremely annoyed at him and his attitude, so maybe he unintentionally-- totally unintentionally-- annoyed someone important. Either way, he definitely isn’t the one in the wrong.
When he sits down in Nedzu’s office, it is for a far different reason than he expected,
“Bakugou, we’ve called to tell you that your locker can’t fit the sheer amount of things being shoved into them on the daily, so we are giving you two lockers now. It’s a necessary measure.”
“Hah? Why aren’t you doing anything about the extras trying to poison me with food?”
Nedzu blinks once, twice.
More importantly… “You called me in the middle of class just for this?” Bakugou rages.
The look he gets from Nedzu is one of utmost confusion.
<3
Though he shouldn’t be shocked-- obviously someone would like him-- he kind of is.
Someone sent him a love letter.
It’s the first one he’s gotten at UA.
The very first.
Of course, he actually had gotten a lot more in middle school. He probably hasn’t gotten any at UA because no one has time to worry about trivial crushes. Not that he himself is trivial, just the idea of liking someone. Who cares about that, when you were training to become the number one hero?
He eyes Deku and Uraraka blushing around each other with disgust.
He returns to inspecting the love letter. It’s pretty obvious that it is one based on the excessive amount of hearts on the envelope, and the pink color of it. Nothing like the fighting challenges he’s been getting more and more of every day that are also all pink and have an excessive amount of hearts.
He opens the love letter with a bit of curiosity. He’s interested to know who likes him, but it doesn’t go much past that.
haha u thought - Pikachuwu
Fucking Kaminari.
Bakugou turns around, and stalks off to Class A. He is a man on a mission, and that mission is to absolutely beat the shit out of one Kaminari Denki.
The first love letter he’s ever received throughout the entire year, and it’s just a prank from that dumbass?
The very first love letter?
Why did it have to be the very first?
The very very first?
Bakugou seethes while Todoroki, Kirishima, and Iida try to pull him off of Kaminari to no avail, this is a crap very-first-ever-in-his-whole-high-school-career love letter.
<3
Everytime he opens both of his lockers, they’re overstuffed with fighting challenges and tutoring requests. Things have really gotten out of hand.
They have a school wide assembly that day.
“Bakugou Katsuki, please come up to the stage.”
He goes, every step a rebellious stomp piercing the quiet that has settled over the school.
Nedzu hands him a notecard, saying, “Please read this.”
Bakugou walks up to the mic and reads robotically off the card. “I, Bakugou Katsuki… Am not receiving any love letters to my lockers at this time. If you have any for me then please send them to Shouta Aizawa’s mailbox in the office, thank you.” Bakugou pauses, then looks at Nedzu. “Hah? Why the hell did you ask me to read this? I haven’t been getting any love letters, just tutoring requests and fighting challenges in weird colored envelopes with hearts all around them.”
You can literally hear a pin drop.
<3
There are only a few fighting challenges now, so he supposes that Aizawa is getting flooded with all of them instead. That’s fine, he doesn’t intend to ask Aizawa about them anytime, he can do whatever the hell he wants with them.
Originally, he’d entertained the fighting challenges, but there were so many requests that it was just too fucking annoying to look through all of them anymore. He’d rather spend his time being productive than sorting through illegible handwriting and trying to puzzle out just exactly who left the challenge because ninety-nine percent of the time no one left their names and instead just told him to meet them somewhere. It wasn’t worth it to go all the way somewhere only to be met with someone weak.
It happened once. He met someone at the back of the school and she had tried to speak to him. He asked her if they were going to fight or not, and she just stared blankly at him. He walked out, muttering angrily that she wasted his time. He could hear her crying after, but he shrugged. Weak ass bitch. If she was going to ask him to fight she should at least be a little prepared about it.
Despite him not taking challenges anymore, attempts on his life are still made every day. Somehow food keeps making its way into his locker, whether they’re heart shaped candies, heart shaped chocolate, or heart shaped anything really. Whoever is trying to kill him isn’t very sneaky. It’s obvious that the fifty-seven various heart shaped foods he’s counted today are all definitely from the same person, because they’re heart shaped. The killer is very determined to kill him with poisoned heart shaped food.
It really doesn’t seem like thee shitty nerd’s doing, though he can’t drop him from the suspects list completely… Somehow Deku always ends up getting involved in his business-- which is very annoying by the way-- so it’s still plausible it could be that piece of crap.
At least with Aizawa managing things he’s free of fighting challenges for a while. Or at least that’s what he thinks until Aizawa stands at the UA entrance gates with a megaphone, yelling at everyone who enters. “For those of you that send love letters to Bakugou Katsuki into my mailbox from this point forward, I will either shred them or give them to Midnight to drool over, read out loud in class, or read out loud to the faculty. Stop. Sending. Me. Love. Letters. For. Bakugou. Katsuki.”
Bakugou wonders why they keep calling the fighting challenges love letters, but whatever.
Later, his locker is stuffed full of letters and food yet again.
<3
There is another school wide assembly.
“Bakugou, come up here and read this.” Nedzu looks done with the world.
There's an image of the local shipping company being projected on screen, with a map and an address listed.
He is handed another notecard to read off of monotonely. “I, Bakugou Katsuki… Am not receiving any love letters to my lockers at this time. If you have any food, tutoring requests, love letters, fighting challenges, or any other various letters and/or items for me then please send them to private mailbox forty-seven at this location. Point to screen projection.” Bakugou decides to add some of his own words onto the weird speech, because what Nedzu just made him say makes zero sense to him. “Okay, listen here, whoever keeps trying to poison me with heart shaped food-- I’ll find you. And if any of you extras want to send me fighting challenges, put your damn name on it!”
There’s various screaming around the entire student body.
At the end of school, Aizawa hands him the keys to the mailbox and says, “Good riddance.”
<3
When Bakugou finally goes to open the mailbox, fighting challenges pour out of it and there is food surrounding the area, all labeled with his name.
He sighs, and carries as many as he can, looking for the nearest trash can.
When he throws out everything, someone approaches him. They look defeated, like the energy has been sucked out of them, leaving them hollow and lifeless.
“Excuse me, are you the owner of mailbox forty-seven?”
“Yeah, what’s it to you?”
“Please, I will literally pay you to return the keys to us, just stop using this mailbox-- I can't take being interrupted for the umpteenth time because some guy or gal asks where the hell mailbox forty-seven is. Please.” The man begins sobbing, and pulling out his wallet, shoving Yen into Bakugou’s hand. “Here, take one-thousand, one-thousand more, ten-thousand. Please. Leave.”
Bakugou forks the key over after refusing until the man has nothing left in his wallet, feeling one-hundred-thousand Yen richer and cackling madly.
<3
Everyone has come to the conclusion that Bakugou is too shy to call them love letters or anything of the like, so he calls them fighting challenges. They’ve also come to the conclusion that he’s allergic to all the food they’ve tried to send him thus far.
Some people are confused by everyone’s conclusions though. They had genuinely been sending him fighting challenges.
In any case, Bakugou is startled when he opens his locker to find anything but chocolate hearts. There’s random food like meat skewers and jello, all still heart shaped though, and probably still just as poisoned.
He still won't fall for it.
<3
They host another school wide assembly.
Nedzu smiles. “We. have. No. Solutions. Left. If. You. Like. Bakugou. Katsuki. Just. Tell. Him. Right. Here.”
And so, all the girls and boys in UA enter a telepathic stream of communication. No, it’s not anyone’s Quirk. It’s just happening.
They all collectively think: If one of us shares, we all share. If none of us share, everyone stays quiet. If I go down, you go down with me.
In the end, the entire school stays silent.
“What did I tell you," Bakugou says, "love letters my ass."