Chapter Text
Every morning the maple leaves.
Every morning another chapter where the hero shifts
from one foot to the other. Every morning the same big
and little words all spelling out desire, all spelling out
"You will be alone always and then you will die".
When Kara first arrived on earth she hated it.
She hated how different from Krypton it was. Earth was loud, too loud, too bright, too much. It was harder than they anticipated and she was thrust into it without any previous preparation, without any warning as to how it would’ve actually been to live on a planet whose central star made her body act weird and dangerous.
She felt weak, vulnerable and powerless. Contrary to the truth that she was one of the strongest beings living on earth, she felt like she could crumble and break at any given moment. Left alone in a world she knew nothing about, with a cousin who rejected her and powers she didn’t ask for, having lost her whole planet, her whole family.
She never expected to find comfort where it wouldn’t last.
It had been ten months since Kal, err, Clark left her with the Danvers and Kara could say with eighty percent certainty that she was adjusting well to earth.
She didn’t break as many things anymore; she didn’t burn as many holes on the walls with her heat vision anymore. The noise was diminished with the help from the eye glasses Jeremiah got her, which helped with her x-ray vision as well, overall she could say she was “nailing” at being a human, not so much for a normal human, but in the overall she could pass.
The Danvers were a very nice and welcoming family. The parents, Eliza and Jeremiah, made sure that she was always comfortable and had everything she needed even though their appliances and mannerisms were so different from her Kryptonian costumes and utilities, so basic and outdated. The Danvers daughter was a different story, she started off being pretty cold towards Kara, sometimes she wouldn’t even direct a word towards the young blonde barely sparing her even a glance; but after a while she started warming up to the younger girl.
She also learned the house dynamics pretty well. She learned that when Eliza had a big work project they wouldn’t see her for more than a few hours during breakfast and dinner until she finished and then all she would do is fuss about them, making sure they ate and where well. She learned that Jeremiah used to travel a lot for work, even though she didn’t know exactly what his work was, all she knew was he was a scientist like Eliza, and that he took as much time to be present and funny, he was funny by human standards, she learned.
But in the eventuality of ever being alone in the house with Alexandra who preferred Alex ( Alexandra sounds like mom is scolding me - said the teen the first time Kara addressed her), she learned that Alex had some “particularities” to her that sometimes would require Kara to help her, and she didn’t understand why, they never explained it further, just said she would know eventually and rushed to work.
Alex always looked fine.
Sure she was a bit moody and angsty, and sometimes too cocky in Kara’s opinion, but she liked the smug look and that somewhat arrogant smirk the older girl seemed to wear all the time, it made her look even more attractive, in Kara’s innocent opinion.
But she always seemed fine, like she was moving with the wind and the ocean waves. Sure Alex acted like she had no care in the world sometimes, but that was what she came to understand as typical human teenage behaviour from some of the movies she’s seen. Maybe she should start seeing other movies than the ones Alex shows her.
That’s why she didn’t understand what happened that Saturday morning, it started like every other.
When she woke up that morning Alex was still in bed sleeping, which was not a surprise, Kara was an early riser, she liked getting up when it was still dark, just shy into five in the morning and sat on the sand watching as the sun rose up to the skies.
She was mesmerised with the colour palette that always painted the skies, it was so different from Krypton's constant red-orange. Many a day she’d sit there with her easel and a blank canvas and would paint the scenery, the light pink hue that sometimes managed to catch the skies before the orange and bright blue could was her favourite, she had made many paintings of such.
Today however she didn’t feel like painting nor sitting on the sand, so she walked to the deck and sat on the comfortable couch that Jeremiah put there for her, apparently they barely used that space of the house and so it was never given much attention, until she appeared.
She sat there watching, mesmerised as the sun started peaking out under the horizon line and the spectacle of colours began to take action, she observed quietly committing every single detail to memory in the eventuality of her wanting to paint it sometime later on.
After the spectacle of colours finished, she stood and perched her upper body on the railing wanting to catch sight of Alex running down to the beach for her surf session. She waited a few minutes but after not seeing the older girl she went back inside and to their room.
Normally Alex would already be down on the beach “catching waves” like she always did every weekend, and Kara would go down, if she wasn’t already there, and watch her until Eliza yelled that breakfast was ready and they would go inside to eat, Alex would linger for more minutes until Eliza went out to get her.
She walked to Alex’s bedside and moved to touch her shoulder when a quiet voice stopped her, making her jump in surprise with a yelp, her heart pounding in her chest.
- I’m awake… - Alex said, voice hoarse and sounding breathless, like when she’d run after Kara on the beach - Just go downstairs… I’ll be there… Any moment…
She said between breaths, like she was struggling to get the words out and it was physically painful for her to do so. Kara worried, she didn’t know what was wrong, she never saw Alex like that.
Alex always looked ALIVE, like she could reach the moon and catch stars, in those ten months she’s been living with the Danvers, she’s never really seen Alex look that pale and frail, even her heartbeat was slower, her breath came in ragged pants, like she’d ran a marathon. Even when she had quiet days it wasn’t like this, they became closer in those quiet days, when all Alex would do is pull a blanket and turn on a random movie and they would cuddle on the couch.
Kara’s eyes widened. Now that she thought about it, Alex’s quiet days looked a bit like this. She always had a little difficulty breathing, talked very slowly and even laughing sounded painful. Kara learned to not talk much when Alex was like this, she’d just let the older girl use her as a pillow and the next day Alex would be back to her normal bouncing off the walls and overly cocky self.
- Do you feel sick? - she urged, worry colouring her words - Should I call Eliza? Or Jeremiah? Do you need anything? What can I do? - she started pacing the length of Alex’s bed biting the tip of her finger in clear concern.
Alex moved slowly, too slowly, lacking her usual energy, Kara moved to help her sit up and recline against the headboard, gaining herself a weak smile from the brunette. Alex patted the bed beside her, a clear invitation for the blonde to sit with her, so she did, deciding to lay her head on Alex’s lap instead, the brown haired girl loved to play with Kara’s blonde mane claiming that it had a silky texture and was calming.
They stayed like that for a few minutes, minutes that spiked Kara’s worry to the roof. Alex’s breathing kept coming out short and ragged, her heartbeat was slow and she was turning even paler. She sat up and helped Alex settle on her bed again before she shot out the room in pursuit for one of the parents.
She found them both in the kitchen, Jeremiah was finishing a batch of his famous and delicious blueberry and chocolate chip pancakes while Eliza squeezed the juices of a few oranges. She dropped in front of them, denting the floor a little and not even caring about it, all that was in her mind was that Alex needed help.
- Alex can’t breathe, she’s pale and her heartbeat is slow! - she rushed out, eyes big and shiny with tears of concern.
Before she could utter more words, both the adults bolted out of the room and up the stairs in record time, faster than she actually thought they could. Following them up the stairs she watched from the doorway as Eliza pressed her ear on Alex’s chest, probably to confirm her heartbeat, and Jeremiah secured an oxygen mask on Alex’s face.
She was scared, they were moving frantically and talking to and above each other, sometimes not even noticing the other as they worked on trying to find out what was wrong with Alex, she assumed. The latter, on the contrary, barely moved, she laid prone on her bed hardly breathing, Kara could clearly hear the struggle that was happening in the brunette’s lungs for air; she was so focused on Alex’s broken figure that she didn’t even noticed Jeremiah addressing her nor the tears that were falling down her face.
She couldn’t really process what he was telling her, what he wanted her to do, or what exactly they were trying to do. Her heart was beating wildly in her chest as Jeremiah picked Alex up from the bed and took fast strides towards the door, she moved out of the way and followed after them as they entered the car and journeyed to the hospital.
Scared wasn’t enough to describe how she was feeling. She was petrified, afraid to lose the reason she was starting to feel at home on earth.
The car ride to the hospital was a blur to her, all she could see, hear and feel was Alex’s heartbeat slowing down at every minute past and her lungs struggling for oxygen in a never ending fight. It felt like it lasted forever until they arrived at the hospital and Alex was whisked away by an army doctors and nurses.
And they had to stay back and just watch her go.