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"shhh, shhh calm down,"
"i fucking hate you!" gerard kicked, frank holding him from behind and gently running his hand up and down his arm.
tears stained gerard's cheeks through his anger, and hatred.
it was so very jarring the first time gerard had a breakdown like this, it was unexpected and it was almost like nothing triggered it.
"gee, gee, can you breathe, please?" frank hummed to him; knowing he was the brunt of this meltdown.
"fuck you!" gerard spat, desperately trying to escape from his grasp.
"alright." frank sighed.
his breathing was rigid, and it went silent for a moment; before gerard slowly fell to the floor as a sobbing mess.
his hands covered his face to muffle his cries as frank lowered himself down with them; and leaned against the wall behind him.
"there it is, thats it," frank ran his hand through his hair.
"im sorry, im sorry– frank im—" he gasped, "—im so sorry."
it wasnt unusual for gerard to have a meltdown like this. they had suffered with borderline personality disorder for years now, and frank being the one who was around the most, he was always the one who caught the force of his splitting.
"i dont— i dont hate you im sorry im s—" they sobbed harshly, choking on their own tears. "—i love you s—so much i didnt mean it, i promise i–i didnt mean it,"
"i know, i know, its okay, shh," he rocked them back and forth whilst trying to calm him.
"baby its okay, ive got you, yeah? i dont hate you," he reassured him. "youve done this before and its normal, i promise you this is okay."
his reassurance used to be when he asked for it, or, well, begged for it after his forgiveness. now it came as a second nature for him.
"promise?" gerard's voice was hoarse from his sudden episode.
"i promise, i really do. i promise on my life."
they sat there for a while, as frank prepared for the next unexpected episode to arise once again.