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Marinette shivered harshly from within her little cocoon of blankets, feeling tears roll down her cheeks as she listened to each sound throughout the night. Raspy and helpless coughs could be heard, children screaming and crying for their mothers about the blood that no doubt covered their clothes and hands from the plague that was quickly taking over their city. It hurt, all of it hurt. Not her, she wasn’t contaminated. Not yet, and hopefully not ever. But it hurt seeing her city in shambles like this, her city crying for help that she could not get. Even if she could, it would be far too late.
Mr. Ramier and Ivan had the worst of it, Chloe and Lila following closely behind. God, if there was another reason to hate Hawkmoth it’d be the sickness that he had unknowingly cast upon the entire city, slowly shriveling it down to nothing but a cesspool of desperate families and hopeless citizens who sat and cried their goodbyes to loved ones, unsure of when the time would come.
Marinette considered calling up friends, family, anyone. Anyone outside of Paris to help her. Tom and Sabine were in no place to help, they could barely run the bakery and she couldn’t risk anyone coming to help her from outside the city in case they too became possessed by the deadly akumas. She was at a stalemate, wishing for help that should never be granted to her. She was condemned to this cursed city, similar to how her father was cursed with saving Gotham. It was hopeless in both cities, villains ran amok without a care in the world and while the heroes did all they could, it was the small things that made everything so much worse. Paris, the City of Love, was far too similar to Gotham. It wasn't a good sign.
It got worse. So much worse. There was no cure, well, not any known cure at least. No cure, no hope, and of course school was still a thing throughout it all. Marinette just wanted to be hopeless in silence, without having anxiety about her class and her grades. It did bring a little sense of normality to the day but that would quickly sour if anyone had a little coughing fit. They would be hunched over their desk for the entire day if they weren’t sent to the nurses’ office for a temporary remedy. It was the one disease Lila couldn’t lie about and it was slowly killing everyone it touched. Anyone who was unfortunate enough to have their negative emotions turned and twisted against them to do the bidding of Hawkmoth. It would touch anyone. Mostly the youngest of the children or toddlers, poor things were so emotional and teenagers weren’t the best with things either.
It was sickening to see just how quickly things had turned around against the city. Things didn’t get better after Cat Blanc, sure, she’d been able to purify her boyfriend but that didn’t stop his mistrust of his father. That didn’t make her pain go away. She hated being confused with her emotions. She loved the blonde dearly but after realizing that he only dated her because she was Ladybug and not because she was the girl who loved him without a mask didn’t make it better. She supposed she shouldn’t be talking like this, she fell for Adrien, not Cat Noir. She fell for the sad mask of a boy and not the real dorky him, but she at least didn’t trick him into dating her. She at least didn’t only date him because of who he was, she fell for who she thought was the real him and it backfired severely when she was blackmailed into breaking his heart.
And yet, the love never went away. It should have, Marinette wished it had. It would make everything easier to forget about it but every time she saw him she was reminded of what they had been and who she had loved. She couldn’t just stop loving him, not after what they’d been through both as a couple and as partners. It was wrong of her.
Of course, her little brooding session was interrupted by her phone blaring wildly in her ear. She reached over, feeling her shoulders relax when it was just Alya.
She answered, obviously, and flinched when she heard the girl trying to cover up her coughing.
“Alya, it’s three o’clock in the morning, get some rest.”
Marinette could feel the glare that Alya sent her through the screen before she yawned.
“We all know it, girl. Nothing is going to get better. Ever. May as well make the most of it to tell you you’re my bestie at every chance I get.”
Marinette could feel bile rising in the back of her throat at that. She really didn't want to turn in a snotty and puking child right now. Not with Alya listening in. Not with her siblings who had likely hacked her phone listening in.
“But at three in the morning?”
“Yes, you were awake anyways.”
“Because I’m used to being awake at this time. It’s one of the only times I can call my family right before dinner.”
Alya sighed, and Marinette could just see her massaging her temples as she sat in bed.
“Listen girl, I get it, you’re nocturnal but seriously, I have no idea what I should do. My mom’s the only one who hasn’t shown any sign of the sickness and I know I promised you I wouldn’t tell anyone the true cause of it but everyone’s suspicious of it anyways. I just, I want to hug my mom without her worrying about it being contagious.”
Marinette squeezed her eyes shut and took a few calming breaths. “Alya, there is nothing more than to tell everyone not to worry about getting others sick, that it's all because of Hawkmoth but then nobody will like me or trust me and things have already been awkward between Cat Noir and I.”
“Don’t you already know Hawkmoth’s identity? Just go for it.” Alya growled on the other end and Marinette curled in on herself at her best friend’s harsh tone.
“It’s not that simple, these things may take days of planning and preparation and I’ve already tried once and it ended with Cat Noir being akumatized and almost destroying the planet and turning it into a toxic wasteland. That’s without considering the fact that we can barely look each other in the eyes anymore. It’ll be difficult to work together.”
Alya coughed harshly and Marinette held her phone away from her ear for a few seconds so it wasn’t as loud. Not as real. Not as undeniable as her sick parents.
“So call the Justice League, the Mayor just did it a few hours ago, I’m sure if the hero themself or even a young civilian also did it they’d at least investigate.”
Yeah, like having her Dad or Clark or Diana come here was a good idea. Even Hal was a bad decision.
“And if one of them gets akumatized? Then what?”
Alya was likely getting exasperated at this point and Marinette could do nothing but whimper in her silence.
“Fine, okay, you know what? I get it, I don’t know what’s going on between the two of you but you guys better sort it out so that there’s a chance of us getting better.”
“Okay, I’ll see what strings I can pull. See you later?”
“Yeah. Whatever. See you in class.”
Marinette did not in fact see her in class. She woke her up that morning and coughed up a storm before rambling and Marinette shook her by the shoulders, telling her to calm down before she got worse. Alya closed her mouth, eyes wide as she stared at Marinette with a look akin to horror. Tears began streaming down her friend’s face and Marinette couldn’t help but gulp at the foreboding feeling radiating from everywhere.
“It’s Ivan! Mylene was just telling me about how-how he was admitted to the hospital last night. He’s in a coma now but-but they don’t know if he’ll ever wake up again.” Alya blubbered out, wailing and sobbing as she gazed around Marinette’s room.
Marinette froze, feeling her panic rise at the thought of the soft giant going through that, let alone not waking up again. If they pulled the cord on him, if they deemed it useless, Marinette didn’t know what she’d do. The boy had been nothing but kind to anyone.
Ivan was by no means small and Marinette hated the implications that if that happened to him, what would happen to someone smaller or weaker. Like August, the poor baby never got a break. If something happened to August, well, it might just be worse than being in a coma.
Tears were welling up and all Marinette wanted was a break. A break from the Hawkmoth and Mayura, a break from school, and a break from all the bad news. She quickly texted her father the details before asking if she could go back to Gotham for a visit. She quickly muted her phone, not looking forward to the lecture that she was bound to receive about not informing anyone sooner.
Alya looked at her questioningly before she covered her mouth as another onslaught of coughing broke out. Alya seemed dizzy, woozy and nauseous and it wasn’t hard to figure out that she likely had a fever. They usually didn’t last more than a few minutes but it was still worrisome.
“Alya, I promise I’ll get you guys help. I just ordered a ticket to see my family in Gotham,” Alya’s eyes widened at that one, “I’ll see if I can find one of the vigilantes there.”
They were definitely going to try to help and Marinette’s only solution to that was allowing them to do their thing but out of Paris where they won’t be touched by the influence of Hawkmoth’s akumas.
“I didn’t know you had family in Gotham. I thought that they were from New York or something.”
“No, just scattered throughout New Jersey. Mostly just Gotham but my brother lives in Blüdhaven.”
Alya’s head tilted to the side curiously and Marinette quickly got up and waved Alya out so that she could change. Things never were like they used to be, not with the pain or the lingering thought that someone you cared about may be affected. It was strange, a year ago her only thought was reporting what was happening to her family and keeping them out of the city. It didn’t take a genius to know that they weren’t the most emotionally stable people on the planet and them being in Paris would make everything even worse.
Marinette made her way downstairs with Alya, linking their arms for some sort of stability as they walked the short distance to the school. Immediately, Marinette noticed the fearful glances. Suspicious glares greeted them too and she flinched at the reminder. Their entire class was known for being akumatized or being a major cause of them and it only added to people’s stress. Of course they wouldn’t like her, not many people even knew she existed before Alya. Only Chloe had and back then she’d been her little punching bag. Now, people either didn't like her or were in complete awe while in her presence, the only person in her class that had yet to be akumatized and who spent their time doing charities and didn’t lie like Lila did.
It felt like everyone had it out for her at times and she just wanted to zeta tube her way back home. It would solve her problems. Maybe not Paris’ but at this point the city had less hope than anything Marinette had ever encountered. It was dying, they all knew it and they all stayed for some unknown reason. She just wanted to leave. She couldn't though, not with people still living here being targeted by Hawkmoth.
Marinette looked up, a shadow making its way into her peripheral vision and she glared at the black and purple butterfly fluttering its way through a window. She sighed tiredly when she saw it just sit on the windowsill. Of course it was just here to watch and spy for Gabriel. Of course it was. She couldn’t tell if the man was targeting her or watching her. Knowing him, it was both.
She hated that man more than anything. She’d be able to focus on translating the grimoire and finding a good spell or something to find a cure since Master Fu was busy not doing anything so he didn’t attract Hawkmoth. Smart but stupid. It was weird.
She saw Adrien as she walked by and promptly turned away, forcing the tears back as she saw his disappointed expression. She knew he was only visiting. She knew he now attended a school in London after he moved in with his aunt soon after he got away from his father. She didn’t know why he came here to this school of all places when most students were only after fame or money and the few who weren’t were busy ignoring him.
It was nice knowing that her friends did care after they pieced together that something bad happened to their relationship. Marinette just hid the details, which was everything, from them but they pieced things together in a way that made her proud of them.
It’s why her throat seemed to constrict as her class slowly dwindled down to a few students, so few that they were placed in other classes as the others tried to recover in their little hospital rooms. She tried visiting every day but without having relations other than being a friend she was unable to see them.
And there was Adrien through it all, every time she glanced at him her heart broke. Noticing his cracked smile even as he coughed violently from his own exposure knowing full well what was bound to happen in the future. He never urged her to pursue a relationship with him like he had in the past. He just stood there with a small knowing smile. She watched slowly as he slowly got worse. So much worse.
Eventually, she got around to stopping Gabriel with Diana, Hal, and Kaldur at her side, seeing as they were the only ones who really knew what the Miraculous were.
And then with Hakmoth’s identity came the reveal of the sickness. With that came deep rooted grudges and a break in.
No human with the last name of Agreste was left alive and Marinette finally let the tears she felt roll down her face. And there was no cure.
It wasn’t supposed to end like this. She knew it wasn’t. This wasn’t supposed to be what her life led to. She knew it wasn’t. There was something or someone playing the strings and they were obviously against her. She hated them. She hated the little deity watching over her. If they were bad, they were doing a great job at making her miserable. If they were good, they should be fired.
“He didn’t deserve you anyways.”
Marinette looked up briefly from where she stood looking at the last thing she had of Adrien. She stuffed the charm he gave her away months ago, it hurt too much to look at it. But now, she stood above his grave, rain pouring down on her and Marinette scoffed at the irony of the situation.
Damian put his hand on her shoulder and Marinette was reminded that she wasn't alone. She glared at the ground as she shuffled her feet awkwardly.
“Yeah, well, he didn’t deserve death either. And yet here we are.” Marinette said through the tears. The only thing keeping her from hiding them was the cursed umbrella above them. Her umbrella. Adrien’s umbrella that she had hid away in her closet and hadn’t told anyone in her family about it. Until they found it.
Marinette stared up at her brother angrily. He wasn’t supposed to be here. He was supposed to be with Dick on a mission with the Titans or with their father back in Gotham and leave her alone to properly mourn.
And yet he never left her side, not when she begged him to go and certainly not when she begged him to stay. Eventually he did have to but only because Master Fu decided to make his presence known, a mistake on the man’s part and Marinette could do nothing as her brother switched between languages to curse the man out.
Weeks passed blindly and Marinette thought that they’d all merged together. The Mayor gave up, Chloe wasn’t getting better and Audrey didn’t care about her daughter enough to give a damn. Marinette could do nothing but sob as one of her trusted allies was given the death sentence because of her.
“Star Eyes? You wanna go grab some ice cream? That usually cheers you up.”
Man did that hurt. It felt like everything she felt anymore was pain. And this time it was something that used to make her so happy. Now, it just brought up the memories of dates or hangouts she used to have where they’d hunt down Adre the Ice Cream man.
And now, she hurt so much that even that brought her pain.
Marinette shook her head, muttering something incoherent under her breath as she stared up at Jon who merely pulled her into a tight hug.
“I promise I’ll do anything to make all the pain go away, you deserve it even before all this happened.”
Marinette sobbed, clinging tightly into Jon’s shirt as she shook within his arms. She buried her face into his shoulder and hoarsely whispered how she didn't need it. And really, she didn’t. She hurt everyone in her failure and even after she had rectified it the people she cared most about weren’t able to be there with her. Another mistake of hers.
Jon merely kissed the crown of her head, a frown playing on his face as the flickering fairy lights in her room turned off with a switch.
“I’m serious, you need a break. Wanna go back to Gotham?” Jon looked at her with those sparkling sky blue eyes of his as he seemed to stare into her soul.
Marinette felt her shoulders relax despite her best efforts because only God knew just how relaxing that sounded. She nodded tiredly as she pulled herself away from the embrace and she smiled a bit despite everything.
“That sounds nice actually.”