Archive of Our Own

Disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to me in any way shape or form.

Note: Just a little one-shot of Haku's past. I felt like writing this, I'm sure its not accurate but it's how I see it happening.

First person point of view(never done it before, and just wanted to try something diffrent and see how it turned out)

The End and a New Begining:

Snow fell gently through the sky, swirling every so often as a gust of wind hit it. The air was cold, and the ground hard, almost frozen. A few rays of sunlight managed shine through the clouds but it did very little for warming up the area. I had been outside since sunrise, helping with chores but since I had finished those, I had a bit of free time. After contemplating what to do, I'd decided to go to the small stream that ran next to the family property.

With a little excitement, I made my way over to it, making sure that my Oto-san didn't see me. He'd put me to do some other chores if he saw me running across the courtyard by myself. A sound to my left made me pause, and I held my breath. It was my father going out of the house, probably to talk with one of the neighbors.

Careful not to make any noises, I scooted further out of sight in case he looked over towards my direction. After looking around for a moment, he left, and I waited a few seconds to make sure he wasn't coming back.

I finally let myself breath when I was sure he wasn't returning, and as sneakily as I could, ghosted over to the stream that was behind the other side of the house. As soon as I was hidden from view, I knelt down by the stream.

With a happy sigh, I plunged one of my hands into the water, watching as it parted around my hand before meeting again as it passed by.

If only it would do that in the air instead of just falling like it usually did! It would be so fun, dancing in the air.

With another sigh, I cupped my hands together and brought them up. Water slipped through my fingers. How I wished that it would stay in the air. For a moment, I thought that the droplets slowed before hitting the stream.

I tried it again, bringing another hand full of water up. Concentrating hard, I wished the water to stay in the air. Slowly lowering my hands, I held my breath.

The water swished into the air, and I couldn't help but let out a squeal of delight escape my lips.

I tried it, again and again, the water swirling around my body, circling, twirling.

The smile on my face couldn't get any wider.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo

The breeze cut through my clothes, but I didn't care. I was warm enough. Besides, I'd found something interesting that I could do. Something that I'd never done before.

"Kaa-san! Look what I can do!" I giggled happily at my Kaa-san, tugging on her arm to lead her to the backyard where I could show her my special trick. I couldn't wait to see the look on her face when she saw the water, she'd be so proud that I could do something like that!

"What is it?" My Kaa-san smiled down at me, easily keeping up to my paces.

"Look!" I grinned u at and made sure that she was paying attention before turning back to the water. I waved my hands above the stream and water rose up, dancing in the air. After a few seconds, I looked up at my Kaa-san.

I didn't see what I'd thought I'd see. She wasn't smiling.

Scared.

My Kaa-san looked scared.

The slap came out of no where. Immediately, tears welled up from my eyes and I brought my hand up to my stinging cheek.

Kaa-san had hit me.

I whimpered, stepping away from her.

"Haku, I'm sorry." My Kaa-san had tears in her eyes. "I'm sorry." She reached out to me and hugged me close, kissing me where she'd slapped me. "Never do that again. Please, you mustn't ever do that again!"

I sobbed, burying my face into her neck. Kaa-san had never hit me before. Never before. I must have done something bad for her to hit me.

"Promise me." She made me look her in the eyes. The fear was there. She was afraid. Kaa-san was afraid.

"I promise." The flying water was what I'd done bad. It's what scared Kaa-san. I never wanted to scare her ever again. "I promise.

OoOoOoOoOoOo

There was a roaring silence. Then came the explosion of screams, of fear, of hate. So much hate.

Hate for Kaa-san. For me.

The look in their eyes... there was fear and anger.

That day, Oto-san killed my Kaa-san. It was the day that my entire world collapsed around me. All I saw was blood, and a look of stunned disbelief on Kaa-san's face as she collapsed almost gracefully to the floor.

Then there was blood.

So much blood.

Kaa-san's blood.

It dripped down the pitch forks and knives that those monsters held. The crimson liquid oozed out of her lifeless body as I watched, paralyzed in fear. My body was shaking, I was shaking. I couldn't blink, I couldn't think. Every second of my Kaa-san's death was etched into my eyes, replaying over and over again. Never would I be able to rid myself of that sight. That horrible sight as the life left her eyes, leaving behind nothingness where there was once warmth and love.

Blood.

Why was blood such a beautiful color?

Why did it mock me? My mothers essence, her life's force... Splattered all over the ground, seeping into the earth beneath my knees.

If my monster of a Oto-san felt remorse for what he'd done, I did not know. I could not see it for I was frozen, staring at Kaa-san's dead face.

Pain.

There was just so much pain on her face, so much hurt, so much betrayal... It had ripped me apart.

Why? Why, Oto-san? Why did you...? I though you loved mom, loved us... So, why...? Is it all because of me? Because of what I showed her so happily earlier that day?

I-I shouldn't have showed her the dancing water. I really shouldn't have... It was a mistake, a horrendous mistake. A mistake that would haunt me for the rest of my life.

The water...

Because of the water, Kaa-san had been murdered by Oto-san. My monster of a Oto-san.

As they turned their attentions towards me, my water just... exploded into ice, impaling every single person. Oto-san first. There was just blood and death. Everything was quiet, still. Not a breath, not moan, not a grunt of pain. Nobody survived.

Oto-san killed my Kaa-san.

And in turn, I had killed him. Killed him and those with him with what had been my beautiful water that turned to ice. Now, that same water that I had thought so breathtaking, that water had turned into deadly ice.

From then on, blood stained my once lovely water.

It was dripping ever so slowly down the length of the ice, pooling below, the puddle growing ever bigger by the second. I didn't know how long it was that I stayed like that, hoping that it was all just some dream. A horrible nightmare.

I finally moved when they fell with loud thuds as the ice retracted from their bodies. Holes riddled throughout their arms, stomachs, legs, their faces frozen between anger and fear.

Now the monster was me.

I couldn't look at them any more, instead, I turned towards my Kaa-san for the last time. I reached for her face, picking her head up. I stayed like that, holding her, then with one hand, gently closed her eyes as tears streamed down my own face. They landed on her, making it look like she was crying too.

My chest heaved, sobs wrenching from my throat. Pain, it was painful. My fault, this was all my fault.

"I'm sorry." It wasn't enough, it would never be enough. "I'm so sorry."

Brushing a stray piece of hair off of her cheek with trembling fingers was the last thing I did before gently placing her head down on the ground again.

Then I ran.

I ran, I did not know for how long. I did not see where I went, I just kept running, on and on. Each step taking me farther and farther from my Kaa-san. I ran so far that by the time I finally stopped, it was only because my feet collapsed under me.

Hurt, everything hurt.

The words that kept revolving around my head were 'monster, monster, monster', because my Oto-san had killed my Kaa-san.

But I killed him and the rest of my Kaa-san's killers. That made me a monster too. A monster because only monsters killed.

The darkness followed me from that day on. I missed my Kaa-san but I would never see her again. I even missed my Oto-san. Not the father that had killed my Kaa-san, but the Oto-san that had loved us, cherished us. That Oto-san was the one I missed, not the one that had stabbed my Kaa-san with no mercy.

If only I hadn't shown Kaa-san the water.

If only... I was just stupid.

So stupid.

A little kid wanting their Kaa-san to be proud of him, showing her something he could do. A stupid little kid.

The day he found me, was the day that I found someone like me. I thought now I won't be alone. We have the same eyes.

We were both monsters.

He looked at me and wanted me. Said I was useful.

I could see the look in his eyes, assessing, determining, and finally something. Something that made me want to do everything I could to help him. To be his tool. A good tool. And I wanted it, so bad. I want to be his tool because he's just like me.

I'm not alone.

And I will do anything to be the best tool for Zabuza. The only tool he would ever need.

A/N: Thank you for reading! I'd love to hear what you tink!