Chapter Text
Going to the park was one of Nao’s favorite, if only, hobbies. He liked the fresh air, the people, the smiles he always received. Usually, students like himself wouldn’t take walks in the park. That seemed to be something for young children or for seniors with too much time on their hands. Young people had much more important things to do; homework, part-time jobs, or hanging out with friends. Well, Nao was not like the other students or anyone else he met in the park.
He was a cat. At least most of the time.
Every day, the park was filled with people of all ages. Businessmen and women taking a break after their work, high schoolers unwilling to return home to their studies, children supervised by their parents. Nao loved the atmosphere and the noise, the murmurings of conversations interspersed with the laughter of the kids. His tail swished up in the air as he trotted along the path, looking around the relatively empty space for his next acquaintance. He had become something of a mascot for this park: the ginger tabby cat that was very affectionate but impossible to catch. He had heard about it from his friends; they had even come to this park once to try and find it, and it filled him with something close to pride.
He loved being a cat. There was a special smile he could always coax out of even the most heartbroken visitor and making others happy made him, in turn, very happy. One of these days, he would also figure out a way for Ken and Yo to see him in this form, to make them smile like this as well. For now, it was enough, though.
His paws stilled when he spotted a lone figure on his usual bench: He knew his name was Kou and he had been visiting for a few weeks now. Excited, Nao started running towards him. The first time he had seen this person sitting entirely alone and gaming on a handheld console, Nao’s first instinct had been to approach him. His face looked still, like an undisturbed pond, and he didn’t even seem excited by his game at all. If he could make that person smile, it would be even more rewarding. Nao had also been extremely curious to see which game he was playing. He was usually cast into the role of the observer when others gamed, and he couldn’t resist the opportunity to see what this person was playing.
This was why Nao had approached him and he kept sticking around, because, well… it was very nice to be smiled at. And Kou smiled every single time he saw him, and he talked, too. It was such a contrast to how he usually conducted himself. He did feel a little bad for knowing this person so well by now, since he clearly didn’t know that Nao could understand him. On the other side, he didn’t want to stop showing up either. It had only been a few weeks, but Nao was convinced that he was Kou’s only friend. Well, as much as a cat could be considered a friend anyway. There was no way he would take that from him, no matter what his conscience had to say about that.
Yo had seemed very amused when Nao had first inquired about Kou on his college campus, when he saw him sitting alone in the cafeteria, not even bothering with anything but his game. “That’s Sakuragi. They are a gamer and never hang out with anyone. Probably a solo player, you know how those are.” Nao did know, of course. His brother Hirotaka had never had any friends, either, and would probably rather play on his console until his fingers bled rather than have a single instance of small talk. Even Ken had something to say about Kou after remembering they had been in the same class in school: “Yeah I don’t think they are interested in having friends.”
The thing was, though, that Nao had been pet by him the first time when Kou had said: “At least I can talk to you.” His smile had been very different from the smiles the kids or elderly gave him when he approached them. Was it possible for a smile to be sad? He couldn’t really explain it, but the next time he saw him, Nao went straight towards Kou again and felt relief when his smile seemed a lot more open this time.
Now, Kou’s smile was almost dazzling, and Nao couldn’t deny the self-satisfaction of that. Yo had been wrong when he had talked about Kou being a gloomy loner – just seeing a cat like himself brought Kou out of his shell. He even put his gaming console away. Nao couldn’t imagine his older brother doing anything of the sort; he would probably even still be gaming while being evacuated from a natural disaster. And yet, Kou, upon seeing him, immediately closed his game.
“Welcome back”, he said. Nao hopped onto the bench next to him and meowed, being immediately scratched behind his ears. By now, Kou knew all the good spots. And then he pulled out snacks that he must have purchased just for him! That was mostly the reason he kept coming back, even though he usually tried to not show any favoritism. Well, and because Kou didn’t have any inclination to adopt him. He couldn’t help but start purring and stepped onto Kou’s lap.
It was their routine by now. “Do you want to watch again?”, Kou asked, without waiting for a response because, obviously, Nao couldn’t answer. His friends and brother usually also allowed him to watch them game, but it was different with Kou. Whatever he was playing, he always made it look so easy and effortless. It made Nao feel like he might also be able to play those games, even though he knew that was delusional. He was too bad to ever come close, but just watching Kou play made him feel hopeful.
When Kou started the game, one that Nao hadn’t been brave enough to try (by) himself before, he again watched happily. If only he could also play like that. If only he could actually talk to Kou for once and tell him how great it was to watch him. But, once again, it felt wrong to start befriending him in his human form when he already knew so much about him that he wasn’t supposed to know. And telling his secret to anyone was also strictly forbidden. All he could do was be a cat and enjoy their time like this.
And it was enough.
Today, something seemed to be bothering him, though. Kou didn’t even try to challenge the harder bosses and his movements weren’t nearly as quick as usual. He did win every battle, but Nao glanced up to his face with worry. He wasn’t smiling any more.
Had something happened? Or had Nao somehow lost his ability to make him smile? Worried, he sat up from his crouch and caught Kou’s eyes. He smiled again, but only with his lips. “Oh, it’s nothing,” he said unconvincingly. Maybe Nao should do something to help him but what could he even do in his form? If he was a human, he could at least have said something, but as a cat? His gaze flicked to Kou’s lips, but no, that wasn’t an option at all.
“I guess I’m just having a bad day”, Kou said and Nao’s chest hurt. He wanted so badly to comfort him because he was the only one who could. Maybe if he got closer to him, it would cheer him up. Carefully, Nao placed his front paws on Kou’s shoulder and licked his cheek. He could feel him tense and wondered for a second if this had been a mistake. Then again, he was a cat right now and personal space was something different for them. Right?
Kou hesitated another moment before suddenly hugging him. His face smushed into his cheek uncomfortably, but Nao didn’t mind for once. “Thank you for always being here to cheer me up”, he heard whispered in his ear. Kou’s voice was shaky and small. Was he crying? Worried, Nao turned his head to check and completely, utterly forgot the situation they were in.
See, his special condition of being able to shapeshift into a cat had one big drawback. He couldn’t do it on purpose, and he couldn’t stop it if a transformation was triggered. Usually, it didn’t matter too much, because the trigger for his transformation was a kiss on the lips and something like that barely happened to him. Even when he did encounter people who loved kissing his cat form, they typically didn’t go for his mouth and instead just kissed his head. He was careful to not let anyone close to his face otherwise. Usually.
This time, he hadn’t been careful and accidentally touched Kou’s lips.
Well, whoops. It only took him a second to transform and then he was suddenly back to being a human, kneeling awkwardly on his lap, staring into Kou’s terrified eyes. He hadn’t been crying, Nao noted, before he realized that maybe he should do something else but stare with his face far too close to his.
Nao cleared his throat and stood up quickly, unsure how to start. He almost wanted to say something stupid like shout “ta-da!”, but he had the distinct feeling that humor was not appropriate in this situation. Even someone like him could see that. “This was not supposed to happen”, was the first thing he could think of, and then he realized how that sounded. “I mean – no, I’m sorry. My name is Naoya Nifuji. I, uhhh, I can turn into a cat when someone kisses me, like you just saw. I didn’t mean to… well, I’m not allowed to tell anyone about that, so could you please keep this a secret?”
Kou still seemed too shocked to react and Nao could feel for him. This was not exactly a daily occurrence. He saw his eyes flicker around, yes, maybe he should also check that he hadn’t been seen. Today it was cloudy, though, and not many people were around. No one had been looking, which was good. When Nao finally looked back to Kou, he seemed to have come back to his senses.
“I… um, of course I won’t tell anyone. Please… please excuse me”, Kou said and grabbed his almost forgotten console and bag. With more speed than he had ever seen him use, Kou practically ran away and left Nao standing alone, looking after him. This was… not ideal. Nao couldn’t help but feel a little disappointed – now he finally had the chance to actually befriend Kou as a human! But of course, why would he want that? After all, he hadn’t seemed eager to be in his presence now. He hadn’t smiled at all.
Nao felt useless, but there was nothing to be done now. He had accidentally revealed his secret and now he had to face the consequences. As he made his way home, not very willing to get himself turned back into a cat after all this, he thought about Kou’s shocked expression. It had been plenty naïve to assume that Kou would simply accept something as big as this and then continue treating Nao the same as before. He wasn’t entirely sure what had made him run, but Nao felt like he might have made his day worse. What if he had made him angry? Upset that his only friend wasn’t what he had been pretending to be?
But maybe, just maybe, Nao could still fix this with an apology.
Unfortunately, the next day was a Saturday. Nao couldn’t exactly go to his university to look for Kou; he didn’t even know which classes he was taking. The only thing he could try was go to the park and hope to find him again. Hope that Kou would also want to talk and come back. Was that again too naïve?
Nao’s rules for transformation had a loophole, which he exclusively used: kissing an animal worked just as fine as kissing a person. This was how he usually turned into a cat and back. There was another cat living in his street that seemed to like him in both forms and it always came when he called.
Once he was back to being a cat (surely, Kou wouldn’t be mad at him when he could use his big kitten eyes on him?), he made his way to the park. It was still early, but he was willing to wait the entire day for the chance to talk to Kou. Well, maybe he could visit the children on the playground while he waited. They were always here in masses on the weekend and as soon as they saw him, a group of squealing children ran towards him.
Nao’s senses hurt a little from the shrill noise, but he didn’t want to disappoint them. It was so easy to make children smile, but they tended to be a bit rougher. One time, a girl had even pulled his ear very hard and to this day he hadn’t figured out why anyone would even think to do that. He still made sure to avoid her whenever she came around.
After he had been petted and carried around for a while, Nao finally looked back to the bench where Kou usually sat down. His heartbeat shot up – he was sitting there! Expertly, Nao squeezed out from between the cooing children and made his way forward. He stared at his target the whole time – it would be terrible if he got up and left again without Nao having a chance to approach him. When three people stepped onto the path before him, Nao wanted to sidestep and ignore them with a flick of his tail, but then a looming shadow fell on him.
Alerted, he looked up. The people in front of him were a family of three: The mother was carrying a large box, the father was bent over him, and the kid – it was the girl that had pulled his ear before. Uh oh. Nao quickly walked backwards and flattened his ears. “Is this the one?”, the father asked his daughter and she nodded, grinning wildly. This, combined with the box, was not a good sign.
“It doesn’t look like a stray”, the mother ventured, but still opened the box. Nao turned around to run, but the father seemed to have anticipated this because his hands shot out just as quickly and lifted him up. With no ground beneath his paws, Nao struggled to find purchase. He did have claws, but he didn’t really want to hurt this misguided man.
“No, it really is a stray. It comes around the park all the time”, the daughter said. This wasn’t Nao’s first experience with well-meaning families. He couldn’t blame them for wanting to take in a seemingly homeless cat. The problem was just that he was definitely not homeless. He didn’t want to go with them.
He let out a loud “meow!”. Sometimes, people saw him struggle and decided that they didn’t want a wild cat as a pet after all. Not this family, though. “I got it”, the father said, holding Nao’s chest firmly, but with outstretched hands so that Nao couldn’t reach his torso which could have helped him propel himself to safety. No matter which way he turned, Nao couldn’t get out of his grip. He saw the box appear in his view. This wasn’t how he had imagined this day to go at all!
“Uhm… please excuse me”, he suddenly heard a new voice. His heart lifted. This was Kou! He was standing next to the woman with the box, holding his bag tight to his chest, not quite making eye contact with anyone, but clearly speaking to them. “I’m sorry, but this is actually my cat. He usually runs away from home, so I was looking for him, and, uh…”
Was it just Nao’s precarious position or were Kou’s hands shaking slightly? The father still didn’t relinquish his grip on him, but he said: “Oh! Is that the case? We are very sorry, we thought this cat didn’t have any owners.” And he held him out to Kou. Nao was carefully transferred to Kou who almost dropped his bag and then held him awkwardly on his hands. What a relief. Nao realized his tail was fluffed up and he quickly wrapped it around Kou’s arm so no one would notice his distress, because that was a little embarrassing. It‘s not like he couldn’t have handled this situation.
The girl looked very disappointed, and Nao felt bad for a few seconds before he remembered how painful it had been when she had previously showed her affection to him. “Thank you and I’m sorry.” Kou bowed to the family, which almost made Nao lose his balance. He reflexively used his claws to hang on, but just barely avoided sinking them into Kou’s skin, only using his clothes to hold on. Then Kou started walking away and Nao relaxed into him. This had been a close one.
After a while, Kou looked around and stopped in a deserted area of the park. He looked down at Nao. “I hope you didn’t mind”, he said in what sounded like apology. Nao stretched up to kiss him so he could turn back before he remembered – now that Kou knew he was a human, the human personal space rules applied to him. He couldn’t just randomly kiss someone else.
Kou nodded. “Oh, yes of course.” And, after considering for another moment, brought him up to his lips. This was better. Kou immediately dropped his hands and stepped back while Nao was transforming. Nao smiled to show his gratitude and paused quickly. He hadn’t realized that Kou was shorter than him. He had always seemed so tall when they had interacted before.
It wasn’t that important, though. “Thank you so much for rescuing me”, he was relieved to say. It felt good to be able to talk again. “I’m very sorry for not telling you that I was human all along. It felt wrong, but it is supposed to be a secret, so I didn’t know what to do.” Kou’s eyes widened as Nao talked and he worried again. Had he somehow said something wrong? He tried to move on, hastily now, as if he could run his apology fast enough so that Kou’s negative feelings wouldn’t catch up to it. “I usually don’t approach people like this because I don’t want to use my cat form as an advantage, but I couldn’t help myself when I saw you playing this game. I’ve always wanted to learn how to play it and I wanted to be friends, but it was wrong of me to pretend to be only a cat. I’m really sorry for being so intrusive.” Now he was out of breath.
There was a moment of silence, in which Nao was unsure where to look. He couldn’t figure out Kou’s panicked face at all and averted his eyes, unsure. Then, Kou surprised him: “No, no, I meant to apologize, too.” He quickly continued talking without even taking a breath, just like Nao before. “It was rude of me to leave like that yesterday and I did not mean offense. I understand that this was a mistake, and I am sorry for letting it happen. You did not do anything wrong, and I will not say anything about your secret.” He looked at the ground, as if waiting for a verdict.
Nao couldn’t help the relief lighting up in his chest. That sounded like he was forgiven. Smiling, he asked: “Does this mean you would like to be my friend?” Maybe he had been too hasty to assume that Kou might have been hurt by him? Maybe there was still hope.
Kou still didn’t look up, but his cheeks started to turn pink. “Well, if you would not mind… I can add you to my friendlist”, he said, though his voice was closer to a murmur. And then he pulled out his handheld gaming console from his bag and turned it on.
Happily, Nao took a picture of the complicated game ID and thought to himself that he should quickly make an account, but all was well. Maybe his secret being revealed was not nearly going to be as bad as his family had warned him it would be. “I’ll send you a friend request, Kou-kun!”, he said while putting his phone away.
“Y… Yes. I will look forward to that”, he said, again averting his eyes. Nao was still smiling when he went home after that, finally having a new friend – and someone to play games with! Despite having friends and going to the arcade with them a lot, this time it felt far more exciting. He had a friend who knew his secret now. It should have been scary, but Nao only felt a sense of possibility when thinking about it. Finally, he didn’t have to hide anymore.