Chapter Text
First bell rings, another new day is upon them. Thirty students wait with anticipation for their Sensei to arrive, anxious sweat dribbling down their skin as they watch the door like hawks. Sensei is normally so punctual, but that’s not why they feel trepidation in this moment. No, they were the new generation of Class 3-E. The Second Generation, one could say. Freshly enrolled as of last month.
Koro Mountain Academy. That was the official name for this institution, but it’s fair to say ‘academy’ is a misnomer. For one, they’re the only class of students on this newly opened campus; they have no upperclassmen or underclassmen in this neck of the woods. For two, it’s more like this is an affiliate Cram School… Years ago, this place had ties to Kunugigaoka Junior High, but then it was abandoned when the Chairman at the time was tried in the Court of Opinions for his harsh, cruel teaching methods.
Surprisingly, this place became a satellite campus again… for the Asano Cram School. That may seem like history repeating itself, but there’s a distinction between Koro Mountain Academy and what it used to be: in the past, this institution served as a symbol of failure and shame. These days, however? Students who didn’t make the cut getting into the Asano Cram School’s main campus were sent here. Not as punishment, not with the intention of eventually returning to the main campus… If anything, Koro Mountain Academy was an appendage to the Asano Cram School. Equally rigorous in every way, the same quality of education that the main campus boasted.
… At least that’s how they advertised to parents when Koro Mountain Academy officially opened its doors, with Gakuho Asano’s full backing. One of Asano’s staff who had been teaching there for seven years possessed aspirations to branch out, to strike out on his own; but Principal Asano managed to wrangle a compromise out of that passionate teacher, seeing as how his Cram School was booming with parents knowing of Asano’s track record as a reformed educator. The young man was all too happy to take on some of Principal Asano’s backlog of applicant students, since he needed to start somewhere and he did genuinely respect the Principal.
And that brought them to the here and now… Thirty baby-faced Junior High kids that were going to be in their Third Year, prepping for high school entrance exams. Of course they didn’t want to be here… It was summer. But their parents demanded they sharpen their academics so that they could get into first-pick schools when they graduated Junior High.
Sensei offered them a carrot for their frustrations. If they could ‘kill’ him, they could skip class for the day (well, the four or five hours that they had together as a class). That’s the rule E-Class lived by… though there was a bit more to it than that. A lot more. Each of them had three maximum attempts to attack Sensei each day; Strike Three, and they had to rein it in until the next day, and they were responsible for marking down their attempts on a board near the entrance to the room so that Sensei and the class could know at all times how many attempts each person had left. Cheaters were given… extra homework. Sensei was a beast with challenging each of them with homework problems personally tailored to them, and no one wanted extra homework…
The final rule to this absurd game… They could attempt to assassinate him as a class, and if they succeeded as a unit then they got to ditch for a solid week. Only caveats were that they couldn’t endanger anyone else, only him; that meant no hitting bystanders, and no taking each other hostage. High risk, high reward… But that meant each of them only had two attempts remaining if they failed to do him in as a group. … Obviously, they had not succeeded as a unit yet. Everyone was too new to each other, so it was hard to coordinate thirty different people. They could cooperate in groups and clusters, but if that group succeeded they would only get the one day off, not the whole week.
Today would be different, however. Today… victory would be theirs…!
They could finally hear the sound of approaching footsteps from outside. That’s the thing about Sensei – you had to keep your senses peeled for him. You wouldn’t always manage it, the guy was just someone that you dropped your guard around without thinking… But if the class was motivated and determined to this extent, then yes, they could make out whether it was his footsteps or not. Sensei had the size of a mouse and moved like one, that’s why it was crucial to be as quiet as possible, so that they wouldn’t miss his ominous approach.
A few moments later, the door to the classroom slid open. A short blue-haired man wearing beige dress pants, a navy blue vest, a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and a black tie with a yellow crescent moon on it came strolling into the classroom with a peaceful, easygoing smile on his face as he made his way to the podium at the front of the room. The man carried a simple rectangular white bag with him, his teaching materials stored within, and he dumped the bag on the floor at his feet. He gazed out at the class, seemingly on the watch for something before he finally greeted them with a pleasant expression as he leaned over the podium excitedly, both hands firmly planted on the podium.
“Alright, people~… Let’s get started, shall we? Class Monitor, would you do the honors?” His eyes glinted with nostalgia and mischief.
A boy of about the same height as his Sensei nodded firmly, sitting on the far right side of the room, a couple of desks back. He had short brown hair with an ahoge on top, and wore dark jeans and a green hoodie.
“Right! Ready?!” As the boy shouted, every single student shot up out of their seats, aiming guns at the teacher from every angle they could muster. They weren’t quite the efficient killing machines that the blue-haired man’s class had been, but he had to give the kids credit for their preparedness and moxie. “Aim…! Fire!!!!!”
Oh, and fire they did. A hail storm of BB’s was headed Nagisa Shiota’s way, and his only response was to bend down… and when he came back up a moment later, he was carrying a simple circular trash can lid, much to the kids’ dismay. He grinned and giggled mischievously as the hail storm didn’t let up; if anything they tried moving around to get past his makeshift shield, but that came with its own problems as they had to keep an eye out and make sure they didn’t shoot each other. They knew the rules, and Nagisa was keen to rub this reality in their faces.
“Oh~! Oh my~…! Welllllll… Why don’t I just call roll while you kids wear yourselves out?! Ishimaru?”
“Here…!” A raven-haired boy called out from somewhere in the mess of flying bullets.
“What’s that?!” Nagisa held a free hand up to his ear mockingly as he grinned impishly. “I’m afraid I couldn’t make that out over all the gunfire~!”
“HERE!!!!!” Ishimaru responded more boisterously.
“Oowada?!” Nagisa called out next.
“Here!!!” Another boy called out from somewhere in the back.
“Ariana?” Nagisa called out.
“Here…!!!” An orange-haired girl answered back.
“Koizumi?” Nagisa called out.
“Here!!!!!” A redhead fired back.
“Kuzuryu~?” Nagisa called out.
“HERE, YOU FUCKING BASTARD!!!!!”
“Language~!” Nagisa teased before continuing the roll call. “Kotoko?”
“Here~!!!” A pink-haired girl called out.
Nagisa continued rattling off names and getting responses back. Five minutes after everyone was accounted for, the kids tuckered themselves out as they couldn’t keep up the spray of BB bullets any further, and really, Nagisa just countered their attempts so easily, ‘cowering’ behind that trash can lid. He smirked as he lowered the shield, detecting the exhaustion in the air as his kids panted and glared at him in frustration.
“Excellent~… All present and accounted for! Man, thanks for the blast from the past~… I remember being in your shoes and pulling that same reckless stunt! I’ll even give you the same advice that was drilled into me. What do you think it was? Numbers are no substitute for inventiveness, perhaps? That any hack can point a gun and pull a trigger? Some of Column A, some of Column B? I get that you’re trying to cast a net as widely as possible, but your approach lacked originality~… Trust me! I’m no world-destroying octopus that can travel at Mach 20, but even I can handle a few BB’s~! I’ve had this bad boy ready to go since Day One.”
The bluenet chuckled as he held up the shield again, patting it a few times proudly before storing it away… wherever he had pulled that out from. His students glared at him incredulously.
“Seriously, does that podium have a secret compartment?! We checked around that stupid thing to make sure you had nothin’ to protect yourself with, and you still got the drop on us!!!” Oowada grumbled sourly.
Nagisa nodded slowly, making a dubious blank expression as he stared out at their stunned faces.
“I know this mountain like the back of my hand, boys and girls! If you want to get that day off, you’ve gotta work for it~! Our time together is short, but I’m gonna treasure every moment I have with you guys!” He placed his hands on the podium again as he stared out at them all with a passionate expression. “… Now, why don’t you clean up these BB’s off the floor and put away those guns, and I’ll go stash my stuff away~?”
The students groaned before they huffed and nodded begrudgingly. Nagisa grinned innocently as he slung his bag over his shoulder and strolled back out of the classroom, sliding the door closed behind him. The students shared grouchy, deadpan expressions with each other, and some of the more responsible ones rose up to fetch the brooms and dustpans from a corner of the room while others got up to retrieve discarded guns off the floor.
This wasn’t a typical school by any stretch of the imagination… But what teacher wanders to class just to call roll, take his class’s attempted assassination of him like a champ, and then waltz back out, casually telling them to pick up their mess?
… It was fair, sure. But the passively smug way he carried himself… It pissed them off, just a tad. Unfortunately for them, Nagisa-sensei was so gentle and kind that they couldn’t stay mad at him. It’s only when they tried assassinating him to get out of class that he got prideful. And that was weird as all hell. Almost like he was bipolar.
And don’t get them started on his ramblings of some insane octopus. No one believed the myths. Just ‘cause the moon was smaller than it used to be, that didn’t mean there was some squid or whatever that could have obliterated the Earth if he lived. It was all some giant hoax or hallucination on their parents’ parts, believing everything they saw on TV and the internet. Yet Sensei seemed obsessively insistent that there was any truth in the rumors…
Right. As if a superbeing capable of world destruction would waste time, teaching a Junior High class. Tell them a better bedtime story.
~*~
Nagisa breathed a sigh of relief as he stopped by the faculty lounge, unceremoniously dumping his bag on the floor again and flopping in one of the seats as he fished out his phone to check for messages. He did say he’d give the kids a few minutes to clean up, and he wasn’t gonna breathe down their neck. Besides, he’d needed to jump across roofs to make it here on time after he missed the train today, his usual daily routine was disrupted.
“Hey, Ritsu? Did you manage to record that?” The bluenet grinned eagerly as the AI popped up in a window on his phone.
“Sure did~!” The pink-haired AI chimed in with a cutesy salute. “Itona’s cameras captured every second! I posted the video to the Group Chat for you, and everybody’s going nuts over it~!”
Nagisa nodded a little in thanks. It’s not like the school building needed to go high-tech… The bluenet could handle just about any emergency or assassination attempt this pack of kids could throw at him. But still, extra security for the kids’ protection never hurt. Any malicious person travelling this far up the mountain to lay a trap or lie in wait for him or the kids was going to be incredibly rare, but they were covered thanks to the technological genius, Itona. The cameras were state-of-the-art and so small that the kids never noticed them, and they served as Nagisa’s Third Eye. Nagisa typically used the footage to review the presentation of his lessons, and to see how kids responded to the material. Koro-sensei could have analyzed each and every one of these children on the spot and adjusted the lessons midway through, but Nagisa didn’t have that superpower, so he had to rely on his friends to back him up. The bluenet was profoundly grateful that his friends were still so tight and supportive… Even after they followed their dreams, E-Class remained a well-oiled unit. Nagisa getting to use this building was always the masterplan; they’re just glad the time had finally come to make the most out of their home.
Nagisa sweatdropped as he pulled up the Group Chat and scrolled through the massive wall of back-and-forth comments. There was no way he had time to read everything here, not until class was over. But still, he noted that even Karma graced the Chat despite the redhead having a full plate of meetings and interviews today.
“Leave it to Karma to say using a ‘shield’ is cheating…” The bluenet grumbled, before mashing out a rapid response to the bureaucrat, asking what the hell he was supposed to do in that situation. And he wilted as Karma replied back with a devil grin, asking if Nagisa was ‘man enough’ to dodge that hail storm like Koro-sensei. Wasn’t travelling at Mach 20 just part of every teacher’s bag of tricks? As if the redhead didn’t already know the answer to that. Nagisa deadpanned and heaved a sigh, deciding to just let Karma have the last word for now. He skimmed through a few more random comments, noting the varying reactions and threads going on; some were impressed with his ingenuity, others were hedging bets on what other episodes of their history would be repeating themselves in this new E-Class. This incident pretty much proved anything was on the table.
Some people called him out on plagiarizing Koro-sensei, claiming he’s too much of an herbivore man to act cool like that. Others fired back that they liked the trip down memory lane. Oh yeah… He saw that Yuji was in the Group Chat. … And Gakushu. Apparently, Ritsu had not been exaggerating when she said that the Chat was blowing up with keen interest in the video; even their friends and acquaintances outside of E-Class were permitted to join in the fun whenever they felt like it. And for Gakushu, that was typically when he thought the bluenet hadn’t been aggressive enough in ‘fighting back’ against his students, or if he’d gone easy on the academics, though there was a begrudging respect, nurtured over years of bonding with their former rival. On the flipside, Yuji was always amazed at the shenanigans E-Class got up to, and always gave the bluenet a thumb’s-up when ‘cool stuff’ like this came up. Nagisa closed the Group Chat for now and went back to his personal messages, having seen that there were a few items.
“Rio…!!!!!” A fierce blush flared on his cheeks as he had to instantly close out of the lewd shot she sent of herself in a sexy white bikini, lounging about on some beach in the UK. That was not a school-friendly picture to be caught staring at, and he had to tug at his collar when the room suddenly felt like a sauna, and he shook his head wildly to clear it. He then hammered out a quick, typical response to the freelance interpreter’s shenanigans. “I still can’t do anything about that…!!! If you’re horny, just come home already!!”
Oh, the blonde had been sending a ton of lewd shots over the years. It’s clear why she kept sending them, Nagisa’s relationship situation wasn’t exactly… run-of-the-mill. Rio was out there, working towards being a diplomat; it would still be a while before she came back home, or at least that’s what she kept saying. But no matter how much the years kept piling up, Rio’s words felt more and more hollow, and it was only a matter of time before she cracked and came back. Rio was homesick – not just of Japan, of E-Class, but of him. As expected of a long-distance relationship, the blonde needed frequent, consistent reassurance that he still had feelings for her. That she still had a home to return to…
Of course she did. Nagisa always took a flabbergasted selfie, courtesy of Ritsu, whenever lewds were sent to him, and he sent those selfies to Rio to prove she still had that effect on him… But he really couldn’t do anything about her… needs… until she came back.
Now, Yukiko and Akari, on the other hand… They were his more immediate concerns, since they currently lived with him. His flustered expression melted into a soft smile as he nodded at Yukiko’s message, which said that she’d pick up milk on the way home, and anything else they needed, just let her know. If Nagisa was anxious about entering a polygamous relationship with three girls – who happened to be his three childhood crushes – Yukiko certainly made the whole experience easier on him with how kind and helpful she was.
… Seriously, though. His Junior High self would balk at dating three girls. And probably outright faint. He scratched his cheek sheepishly as he still remembered some of their… adventures before Rio left to globetrot as a translator. They got married a month before Rio left; the reason being that she empathized with Yukiko and Akari, who would have held off their own happiness with Nagisa otherwise. Plus, this way Rio had to come home someday… This was nonnegotiable.
Yukiko was like the polar opposite of Rio. Not to say that the dark-haired beauty didn’t get… clingy, or that she never had dirty thoughts. However, she was the most similar to Nagisa in her friendly, loving nature. Nagisa and Yukiko didn’t have flashy jobs like Akari and Rio; they were interested in helping people, and that same passion was extended to their relationship. Chores, shopping, Nagisa and Yukiko were the most on top of things when it came to the nuts and bolts of a marriage, the daily and weekly necessities. That’s not to say Akari never chimed in, or Rio when she was here, but Nagisa and Yukiko definitely cut those two some slack because their jobs were that much more intensive. Nagisa and Yukiko were the homemakers of their family, and the bluenet was grateful to her.
“Just a few more pudding cups for Akari, and bread, cereal, and sushi…” Nagisa muttered, quickly sending out that response, too; he was pretty sure they were stocked up on everything else, and if not Yukiko had likely sent the same message to Akari, who’d let her know of anything else. He knew that it was about time to get back to his students, but the bluenet paused to skim the third and final personal message he received that afternoon, and squinted at it in confusion.
“I’ll be there in 5~! n___n” Akari had texted.
Nagisa’s brow furrowed. The actress must have sent that message to him on accident… As far as he knew, Akari was still on a filming session, and even if she wasn’t, Akari knew that he was busy teaching the kids. Or would be, as soon as he decided how to reply here. Nagisa sweatdropped and decided to just go with simplicity. It was likely a mistake, anyway; the context just didn’t make sense to him, otherwise.
“?????” The bluenet knew he was being a tad on the rude side, sending a text of just that, but he’d make it up to the actress later, even if it was just a small gesture.
Nagisa got up and stretched, pocketing his phone and fishing out the materials that he’d immediately need from his bag, and set aside some other materials to easily access them later. He then casually cradled the papers and small books under his arm as he stuffed his hands in his pockets and wandered back to the classroom.
His brow furrowed as he heard some hubbub from within the room. Not that the kids talking amongst themselves was out of the norm, but this sounded… different. He could make out squeals and shouts of joy for some peculiar reason, a lot of disbelief and shock, too.
Sliding open the door, Nagisa opened his mouth to get to the bottom of what was going on.
“Hey, guys, what’s u…” The bluenet trailed off as his eyes bulged at the sight of the new dark-haired woman at the front of the room, being fawned over by his students. Some asking for autographs, others wanting to shake her hand and ask her questions. Nagisa could only stare incredulously, and rub his eyes with his free hand. When the actress was still there, and clearly not a figment of his imagination, he could only muster her name. “Akari…?”
“Nagisa~!” His third wife chirped, clapping her hands together as she beamed pleasantly at him. “I wanted to surprise you. Mister Asano requested my help a few months back, having an extracurricular project in mind for the kids.”
“A project…?” Nagisa echoed before he blinked owlishly. Nothing immediately sprang to memory for him, but then he dialed his memory back to staff meetings a few months ago… and his eyes bugged out in astonishment. “Th-That drama festival thing…? H-He wants me to take part in that, too?!”
Nagisa gulped. That was one of the reasons he’d wanted to get around to starting up a school here. To ‘get out of dodge’, as the saying went. Not to badmouth Mister Asano or his ideas, but Nagisa struggled enough trying to motivate the kids to keep up with their normal studies. Getting them to write and perform a play that wasn’t part of their main school curriculum, that was just for fun to share some art and entertainment with the other classes that they rarely interacted with… Well, it sounded good on paper, but they weren’t going to like all that memorization and stage direction. Nagisa and Akari’s E-Class were proof of that.
Not to mention, this was a Cram School. They were already pressed for time as it is, just getting to the main material. Nagisa could only imagine the unholy havoc this would bring to his lesson plans.
Akari nodded, seemingly oblivious to the inner turmoil her husband was going through.
“Mmhm~! Mister Asano figured that you might have been skimping out on that… So he reached out to me, knowing that I could prepare the kids in the couple of weeks you guys have left until the festival. You don’t mind, right? It’s just something fun to spoil the kids with, and give them a bit of a summer break~! Mister Asano says he can help you tweak your lessons later to cut out some of the filler stuff. He loves reviewing your overall performance, anyway~!”
Nagisa’s eyes were dilated as his right eyebrow twitched slightly. Poor, poor Akari was missing out on so much context… The bluenet enjoyed learning under Mister Asano as a novice educator learning from a Master, but now that he had seven years of experience under his belt, he could safely say that having Mister Asano looking over his shoulder was one of the most stressful things he had to endure as a fledgling teacher. The man was a hard taskmaster, even after he’d gone through a transformation of sorts, courtesy of Koro-sensei. Mister Asano didn’t expect perfectionism or anything silly like that, but he certainly made Nagisa perform very thorough reflections on the examples he selected and the ways he reached out to students; the biggest thing was that while Mister Asano did applaud Nagisa’s efforts to make tailor-made lessons to each of his students, his senior did point out that he needed to apply himself more in challenging his kids to go outside of their comfort zones.
… And you know what? That was fair. But Nagisa could readily admit that every time Mister Asano got his hands on one of his lesson plans, the bluenet suffered a heart attack from waiting for the man to give his evaluation. Seven years on, and the last thing he ever wanted to be stuck doing was a ‘last-minute strategy meeting’ with Mister Asano. Nagisa was going to shave another ten years off his life from this setback alone…
But as he gazed at Akari and the kids… how happy they looked with each other… Nagisa could only slump and rub the back of his neck in defeat, expression going blank.
“W… Well… This came outta nowhere, b-but sure. It’s what Mister Asano wants… and you already set aside some time, obviously, so…” He trailed off as the actress giggled cutely at his reaction.
“I lied about the filming, Nagisa~! I’ve got the next month free, so we’re going to be very busy ‘off the clock’~…” She sent him a smug, demure expression, and Nagisa could only gulp fearfully again.
And tense up in horror when Oowada made a smartass remark.
“So in other words, you’ll be ‘off the cock’ when you’re with us.”
“Didn’t expect Haruna Mase-sama to be shameless like that.” The pink-haired Kotoko added without a second thought, a blank expression of disbelief on her face.
… Did the classroom suddenly become a freezer? Akari was still beaming pleasantly, but Nagisa could tell that they had pushed a wrong button with her. A button that should never, ever be pushed!!!!!
The actress just seemed to nod sagely, as if she’d expected such immature antics. But he could tell a mask was in place… Uh-oh.
“Oowada-kun, was it~…? I think somebody just signed up for prop maintenance duty. That means you do all the lifting, and all the cleanup~!” Akari nodded sagely again, turning to Kotoko next. “And Kotoko-chan~… Since you’re so wise, you can be the one to write the stage play~! I expect great things~!”
The aforementioned students cringed at being assigned duties right out of the gate; Oowada seemed to accept his role, even if he wasn’t happy… But Kotoko… She seemed heartbroken at being tasked as the writer, and not one of the actors. Nagisa nervously chuckled, supposing he could have a chat with Akari later about Kotoko, since the pink-haired girl had aspirations about getting into the field of theatre.
Yet, he dare not say anything now while Akari was just settling in as the main teacher of this curriculum, getting an idea of where everyone else was at in terms of what passions they had for acting, costume/makeup designing, and other ins-and-outs of drama. He reminisced that the last time E-Class did a play – their E-Class – Akari had taken a more modest, unassuming role; but now that she could be real, she could really strut herself as the star actress that she was. The bluenet just knew that Akari and the kids would hit it off; he didn’t even mind taking the supportive role on this one. If he did have one regret, however… Nagisa stared down at the materials in his hand, lamenting that they’d be worthless now, and was preparing to take them back to the faculty lounge when he heard a student suddenly speak out.
“Are you kidding?! Who even cares about this acting crap? We’re gonna suck balls anyway!! Half these guys can’t memorize worth a damn, and some of these floozies just abuse the fact they have huge knockers!!!” Saionji griped.
Nagisa froze as he heard some of the angry, frustrated mutterings of the blonde girl’s classmates, who had to put up with Saionji’s scathing tongue on a regular basis. He didn’t have to look back to see there was a proud smirk on Akari’s face as she gushed over another girl with Boob Envy. Someone that “understood her pain”.
… Of course, that all took a one-eighty as Saionji ran off her mouth on “Mase-chan’s lackluster bod” next, and Nagisa darted out of the room as he felt the freezing temperatures return. Yep, yep, yep… He was just gonna step out and consult Ritsu for a few minutes. Nothing major~… Nagisa just needed to know what the chances were that they’d get through these next couple of weeks without kids suddenly going mysteriously missing.
It’s not that Nagisa was suspicious or anything… He just, um… He needed to know. … For science.