Chapter Text
No one knew what triggered Bucky. One minute he was sitting in the lounge with Steve and Sam, and the next he had vanished. Steve and Sam had sounded the building’s alarm and became more and more worried the longer they searched for Bucky.
When they found him in a panic room with Darcy Lewis and Jane Foster, holding yarn for Darcy’s latest project while Jane scribbled on a dry erase board, they didn’t even realize he had been triggered. Until they noticed that he and Darcy were speaking in Russian.
“What do you mean you don’t speak Russian?” Darcy asked incredulously when Bucky and Steve came to talk to her the next day. Well, Steve really since Bucky would only mumble while looking at the ground. She turned to Steve. “Well?”
“ Bucky doesn’t speak Russian. The Winter Soldier speaks Russian.” Steve said making sure to emphasize the difference. Darcy frowned as Bucky flinched and then she looked incredulously at Steve.
“So, you’re telling me, that the most prolific assassin of the 20th century spent two hours in a panic room with me unraveling yarn?” She asked.
“Yes.” Steve replied earnestly, glad that she seemed to be catching onto the danger that she and Dr. Foster had been in. He frowned when he realized that Ms. Lewis was looking at Bucky (who was still fascinated with the floor, but the blush on his neck indicated he was aware of her scrutiny).
“Ok.” Darcy said with a shrug, moving to go back into the lab and start collating some data Jane had just sent over.
“Ok?” Bucky asked, shocked. His head shot up to stare at Darcy. She merely blinked at him before smiling and reaching out to pat his arm. He tilted back and her smile faltered as she let her hand drop.
“Yeah. I mean, Yasha or whoever,” She waved her hand in front of Bucky indicating she meant whoever was driving his body, “He was really helpful. And competent. And it was nice to talk to someone in Russian. I haven’t been able to really do that since my yaya died.” Darcy shrugged and moved towards the lab again.
Neither Bucky nor Steve stopped her. They could only stare in disbelief as they watched her sit through the lab's glass walls. She seemed incredibly unruffled by the information they had shared with her.
“Yasha?” Steve asked. Bucky made a weird choking noise.
“I- when the Soldier was out of cryo for too long he started to call himself Yasha.” Bucky said at last. The words seemed to break whatever spell he was under and he moved away from the lab to beat a hasty retreat back to his quarters. Steve cursed and followed his friend. He would help Bucky work through this latest setback. Afterall, these flashes had been happening less and less often. What were the odds that they would happen around Darcy Lewis again?
*~*
The second time he was triggered, it was obvious what had caused it.
Darcy had been out on a coffee run and had been kidnapped. Again.
The Winter Soldier had glowered his way onto the rescue team with Jane’s help. When Steve had tried to insist that Bucky, erm…Yasha…stay behind, Jane had yelled at him that he was wasting time and Darcy was in danger. Then, she had turned to the Winter Soldier.
“You’re not going to be a danger to the team, are you? You’re not going to hold them back from getting Darcy?” She had snapped. His only reaction was a slight downward tilt to his mouth before he inclined his head in agreement.
“I will retrieve Darcy and will not harm anyone who is not a threat to her.” He replied once he realized that he had to respond aloud to get this team to stop wasting time. Jane had nodded and, with a resigned sigh, Steve led the team up the ramp to board the Quinjet.
The Winter Soldier did not participate in the discussion on the way to the facility where his handler’s tracking device showed her to be. He wordlessly checked his weapons and reviewed the building’s floor plan. And when the plane landed, he made for the interior cells, trusting that this team would cover his infiltration.
Exactly five minutes and thirty-two seconds after leaping from the Quinjet, he located his handler’s cell. It took him seventeen additional seconds to dispatch the two guards left outside and precisely three seconds to use his metal hand to rip the throat out of the man who he saw standing over Darcy with a knife. She looked up at him in gratitude and he moved to release her from where she was shackled to the wall.
“Bucky?” She asked, her voice trembling. He couldn’t help but frown. Didn’t she know who he was? “Yasha.” She said and he nodded, breaking the shackles with his bloody, metal hand.
He chanced a look up at her face and was pleased to see that she was smiling at him. He was less pleased that she was bleeding.
“Come. You are injured.” He said and she nodded, taking hold of his hand, giving him an affectionate squeeze.
“I knew you’d come for me.” She replied and he was slightly alarmed when she fainted. He quickly scooped her up and hurried back to the Quinjet. There were medical supplies there and he could make sure she was stable before they returned to the Tower.
But when Darcy was in medical, the Winter Soldier retreated and Bucky Barnes was horrified. He told himself that he had probably terrified Darcy by ripping out someone’s throat with just his hand in front of her. He couldn’t face her; he couldn’t bear to see her look at him and be afraid. So Bucky Barnes avoided Darcy Lewis.
In theory it should’ve been easy for Bucky to avoid Darcy as their paths didn’t naturally cross. But the Winter Soldier did not like being kept from his handler.
*~*
The third time it happened, Steve had started to see a bit of a pattern. It all seemed to center around Darcy Lewis. He brought his theory up with Bucky and Bucky admitted that Steve was probably right. He told Steve that he was already avoiding Darcy as much as possible. However, it seemed like the Winter Soldier took over more and more the longer Bucky continued to avoid Darcy.
After Darcy dropped a heavy spectrometer on her foot in November, the Winter Soldier followed Darcy around the Tower, sleeping on the floor outside of her bedroom door for seven nights.
When Darcy returned to the Tower after leaving to visit her family for the holidays, the Winter Soldier dogged her every step. She put her foot down at him carrying her places, but they eventually compromised that he would always stand between her and any door or potential threat. It took a few days to convince him that some of the Avengers were not a threat. For some reason, she could never change his mind about Bucky's best friend and Yasha never let Steve get close to her.
The Winter Soldier spent the whole month of February running her errands and generally helping her in the labs. He still slept on the floor outside of her bedroom, refusing any kind of cot or cushions…even though it pleased him that his handler cared for his comfort.
After an entire month of being displaced by the Winter Soldier, Bucky resolved to do more therapy to try to regain control of his life. As a result, it wasn't until May that the Winter Soldier made a brief appearance, bringing Darcy her favorite type of coffee and apologizing for his long absence. She had merely hugged him until he became stiff in her arms and she realized Bucky was back. She stepped back and nodded at him as she went back to work. Bucky tried not to feel upset at the tears in her eyes.
Later that summer, one afternoon Bucky came back to himself and found that he was sitting on Darcy’s couch. She was leaning against him, her head on his shoulder as they watched some sort of animated movie on TV. She must’ve felt the change in him, because she moved over to the other side of the couch so they weren’t touching. Bucky felt a pang in his heart.
“I’m sorry. I know you don’t like that.” She said, not making eye contact.
“I’m just not used to it.” Bucky said, softly, feeling horrible that he, Bucky, only seemed to make her sad. Darcy looked at him and looked away quickly. “Do you really like him so much? Yasha, I mean.” Bucky asked and then fidgeted under her gaze. Darcy gave him a small smile and Bucky could feel his heart rate pick up.
“He’s good to me.” She replied and Bucky’s frown compelled her to continue. “He explained, after the kidnapping I mean, that he wanted me to be his new handler.” Darcy shrugged, looking baffled. “I asked why and he said that he had observed how my current asset was well cared for and happy.”
“Your current asset?” Bucky choked out.
“He meant Jane.” Darcy said, rolling her eyes. Bucky sat back on the couch and thought about it for a moment. He could see how the Winter Soldier could interpret their working relationship as an asset/handler relationship.
“And…you weren’t mad?” He asked tentatively. Darcy snorted.
“Mad at Yasha? No. I was sad that it’s the only way he could make sense of what I do for Jane, but, I don’t know, I like talking to him and trying to make him happy.” She shrugged a bit embarrassed.
“You do. Make him happy.” Bucky said quickly. She blinked at him owlishly and Bucky rubbed the back of his head self-consciously. “I’ve been remembering a lot more from him. Since February. I think…I think he’s trying to tell me something.” He tentatively put his hand on the couch cushion between them.
“Yeah?” Darcy asked, moving her hand so it was right next to his.
“Yeah.” Bucky replied, taking her hand in his and giving her a gentle squeeze. Darcy gave him a blinding smile and at that moment, Bucky decided that he was done avoiding her.
*~*
Steve Rogers had been in DC for the past three months on a special assignment. He had hated to leave Bucky behind, especially since his friend was still regularly being taken over by the Soviet assassin that seemed to want to have a permanent place in his head. Steve moved quickly through the Tower towards his and Bucky’s shared apartment but stopped abruptly at the sight in the Common Room.
Bucky was sitting with Darcy Lewis watching some sort of television show. Not only sitting together…he had his arm around her! He was stroking her shoulder! Steve felt himself slump in defeat. It looked like Bucky had transitioned to become the Winter Soldier in his absence. Or Yasha as Darcy called him. Frowning, Steve stepped closer.
“Ms. Lewis.” He said, expressing his disapproval at her continued dismissal of his concerns in his simple greeting. He was annoyed and frustrated with the girl; he had explained to her again and again how harmful it was that she kept bringing out the Winter Soldier. And not just for Bucky and knitting together his psyche, but for herself; the Winter Soldier was dangerous.
“Oh, hey Stevie.” Bucky said, smiling at his friend, before turning his attention back to the TV.
“Bucky?!” Steve asked incredulously. Darcy sighed.
“I’ll let you two talk a bit. Pause that though.” She before moving out from Bucky’s arm. Steve watched amazed as Bucky was resistant to her leaving; only allowing her to go once she had blushingly kissed his cheek.
“Cap.” She acknowledged on her way to her apartment.
“What’s going on, Buck? I thought that we agreed it wasn’t good for your recovery to be around her.” Steve asked as a soon as Darcy was in the elevator. As he sat on the couch, Bucky bristled a bit.
“Steve, a lot has happened in the three months you’ve been gone.” Bucky started and held up his hand when Steve looked like he was going to interrupt. “I think that he , I mean, the Winter Soldier or whatever, was trying to, I don’t know, tell me something?”
“Tell you something.” Steve repeated skeptically. Bucky took a deep breath and remembered what he had talked about with his therapist. He and Steve didn’t have to agree on everything. He was his own person.
“Yeah. He was trying to tell me how swell Darcy is. How she’s everything that I’d ever wanted.” Bucky felt encouraged by the dumbfounded look on Steve’s face. “She’s smart and kind and she takes care of people around her. She’s funny and not afraid to stand up for herself or those around her and…” Bucky looked down bashfully. “She’s so beautiful Steve.” He whispered.
“But Buck, being around her brings out…you know…” Steve shrugged and Bucky looked up and Steve was startled by the look of certainty in his friend’s eyes. Bucky hadn’t looked that sure of anything since the 1940s.
“I love her, Steve. And as much as he’s capable of caring about anything, so does he. ” He took a moment to center himself. “I talked about it with my therapist and we met with Darcy a few times and well…the doc thinks it’s good for me.” Bucky had a small smile on his face and Steve, even though he didn’t see how this could possibly be good for his friend, couldn’t object. Bucky seemed different, more at peace.
“Alright. Well, I guess I’d better go get cleaned up.” Steve said and stood up to go back to their apartment.
“Come back and watch a movie with us.” Bucky replied, pulling out his phone and texting Darcy. A ping in response had him smiling. “She says she’s coming back to bake us something and she’ll help us pick something if we can't decide.”
“Alright.” Steve said, moving back towards his apartment as he heard the ping from the elevator and saw Darcy walk over to Bucky out of the corner of his eye.
“How about those raspberry vanilla cupcakes we made last week? Think Steve will like those?” He heard Darcy ask Bucky as he closed the door to their apartment. He couldn’t hear Bucky’s exact response, just the happiness in his voice. Steve had to admit that maybe they had gone around this all wrong. Maybe they should have been encouraged that the Winter Soldier, Yasha, would want someone like Darcy as his handler. Darcy was more likely to smother someone in affection and baked goods rather than order him to go on some sort of murderous spree. If the Winter Soldier decided that was what he wanted…why couldn’t Bucky benefit too?
Besides, Steve loved raspberry and vanilla cupcakes.