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"You don't know what it's like," Those words came like an eightball being pushed out of her throat. Air barely touching her lungs. Hurt is blazed across her mind clouding over her betrayal. In the driver's seat breaking their minimal eye contact Jonathan slumps harder, whispering, "Neither do you."
"I'm proud of you," Her mother said sitting opposite of her on the counter, "I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself." Bravery. It's about knowing what to fight for and who to fight to protect it. She obviously doesn't get it from her father, who Robin has oh so lovingly described as the best bootlicker in all of Indiana, she's more like her mother. Unlike her Nancy has yet to be defeated.
Marrying her first boyfriend and settling down in the nowhere town she was raised in was a crushing defeat. She lost the battle and the war in one fell swoop, but she refuses to let her daughter go down the same path. That's bravery.
With phone in hand Nancy's dialing the one number she knows will expel the last vestiges of her lingering doubts and troubles. Two rings before she hears a deadpan, "Scoops Ahoy, ice cream, just like the public education system we'll scoop your brains and serve 'em back to you! This is Bernadette." A happy smile etches onto her face. Tucking the receiver close she starts twirling the phone cord, "Hi, Robin."
"Nancy!" An excited hum wafts through the speaker, "How's the story going? Did you totally one two punch them with that amazing brain of yours?!" Robin's voice becomes clearer the sound of noisy patrons disappating considerably. Probably cupping mouthpiece for maximum privacy. Nancy's good mood for a spell drops, "I, uh- I got fired. They fired me Robin."
"Those shitbirds! I'll pedal down there right now and shove my foot so far up their asses they'll taste my laces! Just give me the go ahead, baby, they won't see me coming!" Nancy can almost picture her bouncing up and down on the other side, balling her fists in a mock boxers pose, like an engine working it's way to full capacity. It's cute, one of the million and a half reasons why she asked her out at the end of sophomore year, and she has no doubt Robin will keep her word. Shaking her head she clears, "No there's no need. I'm pretty sure my mom's half-way there as we speak."
"You sure? I'm scrappy you know-"
"Do I make you uncomfortable?" Nancy was trying so hard to not interrupt her, but the words spewed forth like a broken faucet. Face pinched and uncertain. She clarifies, "I know you guys barely scrape by, and my family has more money than we know what to do with. Just does it make you uncomfortable?"
"Nance, baby, it's okay. What brought this on?" Robin placates never actually answering. The lack of an answer is still sounding the panic alarm in the back of her mind, but she's holding out for the fact her girlfriend likes to keep people in suspense. Nancy tells her everything starting from the night before until about an hour ago. Tears threaten to fall again. A soft silence tells her Robin's thinking of an answer.
"That's Jonathan Byers for you. He's always been cagey about his money. Ms. Byers, the angel she is, always gave her kids top bill in priority. They might not have the money to buy twenty yachts, but she gave them the best childhood she could afford. Never once did she ask him or need him to go out of his way and earn extra money. It's okay. That's just how he is. It didn't come up because of you or your dad." Robin's voice is low like she was still in deep thought.
"But what about you? Because I really don't want to be talking about stupid boys. Especially when I'm home alone." Nancy can feel the tears in her voice and Robin definitely hears it. Answering, "Me? I'm more uncomfortable spending six to eight hours a day with Steve Harrington. I'm certain the chemicals radiating from his hairspray has halved my life expectancy."
"Trust me baby, I could never feel self conscious about the gap between us. If anything I'm proud! I have a sugar mama-" "I'm only five months older than you, Robin." Nancy interrupts, but it only bolsters Robin who's now like a mine cart rolling down a steep tunnel. There's barely a beat for breath before continuing in French, a sign of being truly excited, she's able to keep up somewhat after three years taking French. There's one phrase that makes her melt, 'Ma raison d’être.'
Gently guiding her back to English Robin emerges in middle of a sentence comparing the sun and the moon. It's fitting, yet tragic. Two lovers who can only admire each other from afar. One who reigns the day and the other who reigns the night, she'd rather believe Robin is the sun despite the vehemence that Nancy is, nevertheless their love grows in the brief moments of dawn and dusk. Some days it's hard to keep love in the shadows, but one conversation with Robin any lingering doubts are dispelled. She is the sun.
"My mom, oh my god, she would be over the moon. Nance, it would be like the Queen of England personally invited her for tea. God-damn Queen of England. The King of Hawkins High, star baseball player, Ted 'Eagle-Eye' Wheeler and his wife Karen Goodwinn 1964 prom queen! Royalty! I'm marrying into royalty!" Robin sounds gobsmacked like she's seen a miracle, a constant since their relationship started, it's so infectious Nancy's almost forgot why she called in the first place.
Married, the word sounded like a curse when she was with Steve especially near the end. Her head was so scrambled with the new found trauma settling heavy on her shaken mind. Jonathan's betrayal certainly didn't help when he took candid photos of her when she was vulnerable with her boyfriend. Being with a woman, with Robin, has been a much smoother ride with the added bonus of having someone who actually believes her makes the idea of marriage somewhat less bittersweet.
If they didn't live in a world that was so outwardly hostile to people like her and Robin, both politically and worldly, the idea would eventually cross her mind somewhere down the road; however, they must stick to a relationship in the shadows. Not like that matters she would wait a million lifetimes for that if it meant she spent each one with Robin.
"Thanks, Robin, you're not so bad yourself." Nancy can't help putting a purr to her voice, "Maybe tonight I could show you how good you are." A shocked squeak jumps through the speaker. Nancy takes a small victory in flustering her girlfriend. There's a blush in her voice, "Sorry, baby, I have an adventure straight out of a Tintin comic. I'll tell you everything after you go back in there and show those smug assholes what a real story is. The world deserves to know your brilliance Nance."
From somewhere in the haze she hears another voice calling Robin's name like a mother at the end of her patience. Her response tells Nancy that their time is up, "Gotta go baby, love you!"
Robin loves her.
The momentary resounding clack of the phone hanging up followed by the dull drone of an awaiting call fades. They made sure to keep their relationship slow to avoid all the reasons her last relationship crashed and burned. Nancy was a lot of things, but a liar wasn't one of them. She's been pulled by the magnet that is Robin Buckley. Her sanity, her safehouse, her anchor. When the world comes crashing down all around her a single phone call, a trip to the band room, or an ice cream run could give her the hammer and rebuild it all the same.
Maybe she's beginning to understand love poems after all. She could write hundreds of volumes filled with poetry about Robin's eyes. Cheesy love songs on the top forty charts sound a little brighter. If her hands knew how to play guitar she's more than certain she would never stop singing of her Robin. It hits her. Nancy whispers, "I love you too."