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Shinonome Ena was not a patient person.
But in the five years that her dear friend has been asleep in, she refused to give up. Everyday, just like clockwork, Ena would visit Mizuki, waiting for the day they would open their eyes and give her the usual teasing remarks that irritated her. She would watch over them for as long as she could, talking to them about everything they’ve missed for the day. The world around them may have changed, including Ena, but Mizuki stayed the same, and Ena felt like it was her task to keep her sleeping friend up to date.
Shinonome Ena wasn’t patient, but she would wait for Akiyama Mizuki to wake up, no matter how long it takes. After all, it had been Ena’s fault that Mizuki ended up like this in the first place.
If Ena hadn’t run away that day, Mizuki would’ve been able to live five years of their life in the real world, and not in a dream. It truly felt unfair for her to continue on and live her desires, while her best friend, who had so much potential to become someone great and give back to those who deserved it, remained dormant.
She wanted so badly for Mizuki to catch up to the times they’ve lost.
The rest of Niigo, as well as the friends they had in high school, surely thought the same, though not to the extent that Ena did. No one visited Mizuki as much as she did, though it was simply because it was something she owed her friend.
She once again followed the integrated routine she had had ever since graduating college and becoming an artist. Heading out to the hospital just a bit before noon just to spend time with Mizuki before going out to the atelier for the evening. This time around, she carried a small canvas to the room. Ena took a breath, smiled, and walked in.
“Hey, Mizuki,” she greeted, and as usual, got no response back. Ena looked around the room, noting the presence of a designer bag sitting by the bedside table. “Oh, it looks like your big sister’s here too, huh?”
Ena instead rounded the hospital bed, assuming that the chair had been taken by Mizuki’s sister. Yet in approaching Mizuki’s bedside did she only manage to see those amaranth orbs that she hadn’t seen in years.
The canvas dropped from Ena’s arms.
“Mizuki…?”
In a daze, Mizuki’s voice through the oxygen mask muffled and echoed. They sounded strained and incoherent, unable to use their vocal chords properly after five years.
On cue, Mizuki’s sister walked in with a bottle in hand, noticing that Ena was inside, and yet before she could acknowledge the young artist with a smile, Ena interrupted her. “M-Mizuki… Mizuki’s awake…!”
Ena could hear Mizuki’s sister drop the bottle she held, before the softening sound of quick footsteps and her voice in the distance calling out for a nurse.
The only thing Ena could do was hastily, yet carefully, grab Mizuki’s hand, tears uncontrollably streaming down her face as she strained a grin for them. She sobbed harder when she could see Mizuki’s eyes slowly, but surely, shift to meet hers, telling her that they were really awake. She managed to croak out a greeting through her sobs.
“Good morning, Mizuki…!”
Ena didn’t dream all too much, but whenever she did, it’d always be about what happened that day.
It made her sick to the stomach seeing how the whole thing transpired, and for her brain to constantly show her this gruesome event just to trigger her guilt had been far too cruel. I didn’t mean to run away. I didn’t mean to corner Mizuki like that….
If only Ena could convince herself that it hadn’t been her fault to begin with. That it had been the pesky, nosy upperclassman that tried to tell her about Mizuki’s secret when it had been none of her business. She was from the morning class, but other than that, Ena never bothered to remember anything else about the girl.
A few days prior, Ena noticed the small differences in not only Mizuki’s mannerisms, but also their appearance. Small bruises on their skin that no amount of concealer could hide, their outfits becoming less flashy and more dull by the day, and soon enough the eyes of pure exhaustion stared back at her. Every time Ena tried to ask what was wrong, Mizuki would dismiss it with their sickeningly dead smile. The one she had witnessed one too many times after the mystery tour.
She wanted to confront Mizuki about it, yet Ena could never catch them at the right time. They seemed to know how to dodge the illustrator perfectly even when at Sekai, and a confrontation at school was out of the question considering Mizuki rarely went to school to begin with.
But on that day, Mizuki went to school.
Ena decided to come early, perhaps because of her surprisingly accurate intuition. Considering Mizuki’s track record of skipping school, she figured that they must be taking supplementary classes which usually ended before the night classes started, and if Ena was lucky enough, she could even catch them before they could leave.
Instead, Ena was met with a 3rd year student finishing up club activities. “Sorry, but you’re Shinonome from the night classes, right?” Ena answered with a sharp nod. The older girl only continued, in a rather condescending tone that Ena absolutely hated. Completely different from the monotonous yet slightly self-important tone that Mafuyu would give her at times. “So you must be Akiyama’s friend.”
“And what of it, senpai? If you don’t mind, I have other matters to attend to before class,” Ena shot back, having no time to deal with a rude girl possibly seeking to throw some gossip, or even slander, about her friend. The girl only stopped her, blocking the way.
“You know, you’d be the right person to tell Akiyama to get their shit together. If they keep dressing like that, the bullying’s only going to continue.”
Bullying?
It made sense. The bruises were clear evidence of it, and she had an inkling that Mizuki avoided school right from their first meeting, for a reason similar to that, which she chose not to pry on. Why Mizuki was being bullied, however, was beyond Ena, until the rather nosy upperclassman decided to butt in. When Ena showed nothing but confusion, she only continued her tirade, clearly feigning concern for the person in question yet clearly being sarcastic. “Oh? Don’t you know? People have had it with Akiyama dressing up like a girl when they’re not really one. The second years have been pretty brutal about it, you know?”
The words took a few seconds to process in Ena’s head. Not a girl? Mizuki’s not a girl? In those moments, Ena could have sworn she heard footsteps from behind, getting closer.
Suddenly it made sense to Ena.
The fears and worries that Mizuki had were pertaining to this.
Before the upperclassman could say anything more, Ena bolted, not realizing that Mizuki had approached her and heard their conversation. Her legs took her to the rooftop, in hopes of finding Mizuki there, but there was no sight of the pink-haired cinematographer anywhere. Ena cleared her head, putting all the pieces together and using this opportunity to figure out what to say to Mizuki when she had the chance.
She remembered Kanade mentioning a unique feature of Mizuki’s voice once, and Ena wasn’t daft enough not to pick up on it either, as lacking as she was in musical knowledge. It had been quite evident in the way they used to talk, back when they first met through Nightcord. She also remembered the time when Mizuki had once asked Niigo about their opinions on how they looked, and the only thing they could do was answer honestly. Mizuki appeared cute, which was their truest form as far as they all knew.
Just thinking about all of this made Ena want to talk to Mizuki about this, but she could not find them.
Until the door behind her opened, revealing that very person.
“Mizu—“
“Hey, Ena.”
Mizuki had a smile, as empty, if not more, as Mafuyu’s during the first time they saw one another in Sekai. Not only that, but the bruises they tried so hard to conceal with make-up had been completely out in the open, appearing worse than Ena thought. It sent a shudder down her back, but she had to stand strong and confront Mizuki about this. “Mizuki…. There’s something I have to talk to you about.”
“No need,” the cinematographer only returned, heading closer to the fence that held the edge of the rooftop at a distance. “Sorry you had to find out about my secret that way. You must think I’m pretty scummy for approaching you the way I do, even though I’m not a girl, right? That’s why you ran away like that. That’s okay, though. I’ll get out of your hair so you don’t have to be associated with a freak like me anymore.”
Stunned, Ena was left speechless, only watching Mizuki as they snuck past a small gap in the fence. The rattling of the chains snapped Ena out of it, and the surge of energy caused her to nearly slam against the fence to try and reach Mizuki. She knew what Mizuki was trying to do, and she refused to let them continue. Not when they still had to talk about the underlying problems. Not when Ena has yet to understand how Mizuki truly feels about this.
Not when Ena hasn’t helped Mizuki yet.
But the Mizuki she so desperately wanted to help now teetered at the very edge of the rooftop.
“Mizuki, wait!” Ena could only say, unable to reach out to them. Mizuki’s smile dropped, now only glancing at Ena with the scariest look she has ever seen them muster. The usually mischievous, childish, yet kind Mizuki, only showed just how tired they were.
Just how much they wanted to disappear.
“Hey, Ena,” Mizuki repeated, looking at Ena dead in the eyes. “I’m tired. I’m tired of it all. There isn’t a point in me being here anymore, right?”
Ena frantically shook her head, now rushing to find the little gap that Mizuki fit themself through. “That’s not true, Mizuki! You think I’m just going to leave you alone even after that?! You’re not a freak!”
Mizuki only threw out an empty, forced laugh. Ena couldn’t find the gap. She couldn’t reach Mizuki. That laugh had been the last thing she heard from Mizuki as their body tipped over, descending…
…fading from Ena’s view.
Ena screamed Mizuki’s name at the top of her lungs, cries and sobs mixing in with her voice, as everything dimmed.
She didn’t have much recollection of what happened after. There had been too much noise, from students growing rambunctious to the teachers frantically rushing to call an ambulance. Ena could have sworn that one of Mizuki’s friends, whether it was that Shiraishi kid or the Kamishiro guy, or even Akito, rushed to the rooftop and only witnessed her pathetic state, weeping without a sound. All she remembered clearly enough to be distinguishable was being taken to the hospital, where she hid and headed to Sekai to inform the others of what happened to Mizuki.
As days passed, turning into hopeless months of waiting, the guilt sank in, and Ena found herself unable to face anyone.
The one who eased Ena’s guilt had been Mizuki’s sister.
Ena was truthfully—and rightfully— fearful to face the woman Mizuki looked up to. Scared to see the woman that pushed Mizuki into becoming a part of Niigo, and the reaction that she would give when she finds out that Ena had been the cause of their dear sibling’s fall into deep slumber. She has met Mizuki’s parents before, and as kind as they were, they never blamed Ena for anything, even going as far as telling her that Mizuki held nothing but compliments for her whenever they would talk about Niigo with them. They weren’t able to visit Mizuki everyday, but they trusted Ena enough with their child.
But upon catching wind of Mizuki’s sister’s return to Japan, Ena became scared. She’s only heard stories about her from Mizuki, and Ena wasn’t so sure about how she’d react.
Ena walked into the hospital room one day, half a year into Mizuki’s comatose state. Neither one of Mizuki’s parents were around, nor were any of their school friends despite it being a weekend, yet she found a rather fashionable suede jacket draped over the bedside chair. Before she could even mouth a question to herself, the door behind her opened.
“Oh, are you one of Mizuki’s friends?”
An unfamiliar voice, yet so similar to Mizuki’s. Ena snapped her head in surprise towards the tall pink-haired figure standing by the door. Features resembling Mizuki, albeit aged, yet holding more poise than her rather childish friend. No, she thought. This woman that now walked towards her had the same comforting, but melancholic aura that Mizuki had.
“M-Mizuki’s…sister?” Ena blurted out in fear, and the woman only chuckled. Even their laughs sounded the same.
“And judging from that braid, you must be Ena-chan, right? Mizuki always talks about you in our messages, and they’ve sent me pictures of your little music circle. I’m Akiyama Leah.”
Ena bowed in response, feeling a pang of sadness in her heart knowing that she had been very important to Mizuki, and she took their precious time together, away from her. “… I’m sorry, Leah-san.”
The woman, who had now closed the door behind her, only tilted her head in confusion. “What for? It’s not like you can’t visit when I’m around, you know?” She gave Ena another chuckle, as if to ease the strange, gloomy tension between the two of them in the stuffy hospital room. However, it did nothing to soothe the guilt that started to eat Ena up the more she spent time in that room with her.
“That’s not it… I just…. It’s all my fault that Mizuki ended up like this….”
She only heard a small hum in response. Ena averted her gaze, but Leah made no advance towards her. Instead, she chuckled once again. “You know, I don’t think any of it was your fault. Mizuki…they just like tackling everything by themself, without wanting to rely on others because they don’t want to worry or burden anyone. That’s just their annoying trait, and I know you find that annoying about them, too.”
Finally, the woman approached Ena, only placing a hand on her shoulder even as Ena flinched in both surprise and fear. “You tried to stop them, right? I believe I owe you my thanks instead, Ena-chan.”
“Huh?”
“Yesterday, one of your circle members…. Hm, Mafuyu-chan, I think? She stopped by yesterday and told me what you did. She said that out of all of them, you were the only one to take a step into trying to help Mizuki out. You tried to stop them from jumping, and even visited them everyday in my parents’ stead. So for that, thank you, Ena-chan.”
Ena was left speechless. Leah only showed her a bright smile, akin to that of her friend’s.
She had never realized just how much she had already done, as she was too hung up on the guilt. Yet she also felt relief in that moment, her fears of being hated by the woman Mizuki talked so highly of now slowly dissipating.
The next thing Ena felt were the woman’s arms around her, followed by the sound of a sigh and a few soft sobs. “It’s not your fault, Ena-chan. Mizuki’s just…stubborn,” she whispered, voice laced with nothing but gratitude for Ena even if it did sting. “But you cared for Mizuki when no one else wanted to. I feel that I owe it to you for doing everything I couldn’t for my dear little sibling.”
Those were the words Ena needed to hear, even without realizing so. She felt the importance of the woman’s gratitude, without an ounce of malice laced in it. At that moment, Ena understood where Mizuki’s pacifist behaviour came from.
As Leah pulled away, she showed Ena another smile. “I guess I also owe your music circle my thanks, too! Since you guys had to deal with my troublesome sibling.”
Ena couldn’t bite back a sad smile herself, eyes quickly glancing at her sleeping friend. “Mizuki truly is troublesome…. Troublesome, observant, helpful…. To the point where doing all of this probably isn’t even enough to make up for all the times they’ve helped me.” The two of them exchanged smiles, having calmed down a fair bit.
The rest of that visit was, for once, filled with conversations, many of which about Mizuki and their relationship with their older sister.
It may have taken another week or so before Mizuki could form coherent sentences after waking up, but Ena was more than patient.
She’s already waited five years for her friend. Another few days of waiting to be able to converse with them is not a problem. Though as to not overwhelm Mizuki, and following the advice of their attending physician, she refrained from asking anything about that day to prevent any relapses during the first stage of recovery, and instead opted to having the meaningless conversations they would have years back just to help ease Mizuki back into the comfort of talking.
Ena wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but she had failed to hold back tears through her smile when the very first words Mizuki uttered to her had been, “Your hair is longer, Enanan.”
It might have been a pointless comment, but to Ena, it meant the whole world. For her dormant friend, who had been stuck in the same dream for five long years, to be finally taking a step forward into the future they deserved, it had been everything Ena could’ve asked for. She wished to no longer rob them of this, because she knew Mizuki also deserved to see how the world has changed around them.
While Mizuki remained confined in bed, far too early to start their rehabilitation process, Ena decided to fill the days with conversations. She filled her friend in with what they had missed the last five years which she also began to reminisce about. In the past five years, Kanade’s father had seen signs of promising recovery and had recently been discharged for the first time in years, and she had managed to save Mafuyu during the process. Mafuyu, on the other hand, found a way to finally speak up against her mother as she started to realize her own feelings, throwing away her good girl image for good. She talked it out with her mother, being able to forgive one another while Mafuyu went on to medical school. Both of them had shown tremendous improvement, and the Empty Sekai’s inhabitants had been just as proud.
As for Ena…. She was able to finally draw something she could be satisfied with. As cruel as it was, it had been this whole incident with Mizuki that caused her to jump into painting after painting, trying to get rid of the void that would usually be filled by the cinematographer as well as the guilt of letting Mizuki slip through her fingers, and before she knew it, she had submitted one of her paintings to an art contest at the suggestion of her art teacher only to win first place. Now a college graduate, Ena moved out of her home and lived in an apartment closer to the atelier.
Ena told Mizuki all of this on a day where they could finally sit up with some help, and she could now clearly see the bitter smile on Mizuki’s face.
“You guys are amazing,” they began, with a lonely expression as they turned away from Ena. She could immediately tell of the jealousy and regret behind the smile. “You guys were able to move on forward these last five years, and all I’ve been seeing is the same ideal dreams of the past over and over again.”
“That’s not true, Mizuki,” Ena interrupted. What she now wanted more in the world was for Mizuki to move on forward with her. With the rest of Niigo. Ena was going to make sure that Mizuki had every opportunity to catch up.
“Now it’s your turn. We didn’t just leave you behind…. We all moved on forward for your sake, so that you have a path to take when you wake up. Kanade has written songs with you in mind, and Mafuyu’s hard at work with her studies so she can help you in your recovery. I may have not done much for your sake, but I choose to stay by your side no matter what.”
Mizuki paused. Eyes lingering towards Ena’s focused, determined brown orbs. Their body started trembling, knowing full well that Ena never backed down on a statement no matter how inconvenient it was for her. For the first time in five years, Mizuki’s eyes brimmed with tears, yet it had only been the first time since they’ve met that Ena’s only witnessing this.
“… Will you really stay by my side…?”
Ena sighed. “Mizuki,” she started, and Mizuki could tell that Ena was about to give them an earful just as she usually would. “I visited you everyday for five whole years! You really think that I’ll leave now that you’re awake?”
The tears finally fell, one by one, with Mizuki unable to return Ena’s almost playful retort in an attempt to lighten the mood.
Ena let them cry. They needed this after five years.
Her expression softened, prompting her to gently pat the crying Mizuki’s head. “You’re just like a child, you know that? So maybe act like it for once and rely on us, instead of thinking you’ll never take a step forward while pretending everything is fine.”
Mizuki could only manage a weak, understanding nod, letting themself loose as they cried more. Ena pulled Mizuki into a gentle hug, not caring if her shoulder got wet with Mizuki’s tears. “E-Ena…. Ena….” They could only mumble through their growing sobbing, weakly returning the embrace. Ena responded by rubbing circles on Mizuki’s back, soothing them as much as she could. “I…. I want to be with Ena, too….”
They cried for a fair bit, the silence of the hospital room being filled with Mizuki’s sobs.
But even as they shared such a sentimental moment, Ena felt glad deep down. She had waited for so long to catch a glimpse of what was in Mizuki’s heart all along, and she felt as if all her waiting had been rewarded for once.
Mizuki pulled away from the embrace once they calmed from their crying and shifted their attention from Ena to the IV drip stuck to their arm. They traced it gently with their free hand as they searched for the right words to say. “Ena….” They finally spoke up after another moment of silence, a small, genuine smile now gracing their face. “Thank you.”
Those words of gratitude held so much weight, more than Ena could imagine, but it was as if she could feel what Mizuki was thanking her for exactly. She reached over to pat their head once more.
“You’re welcome, Mizuki.”
Mizuki later revealed that same day that they remembered everything. All the events that transpired for them to end up in a five year-long comatose state. The regret rose in Ena’s heart, but one apology from Mizuki spiralled down into a long conversation full of apologies and clearance, as well as promises to always rely on one another.
Thus Mizuki was able to take that first step into recovery, and move on to the next.
Ena watched Mizuki’s slow progression into rehabilitation, and after several weeks, Mizuki had started up on some of their old hobbies once again. She felt delighted watching Mizuki sew alterations on clothes with their usual finesse, as if they hadn’t been out of practice for five whole years.
She could tell that Mizuki struggled with walking, though they did their best no matter what. This had been a side of Mizuki she never knew they had—the determination to move forward instead of giving up like they usually did. In a sense, Ena felt proud, overthrowing the remaining guilt in her heart. Ena simply looked forward to seeing the stupid happy grin on Mizuki’s face whenever they managed to walk for a long period of time without giving up, but, of course, this was something she would never admit to her friend.
On days where Mizuki felt like relaxing from their many hobbies and rehabilitation, however, Ena would take them to the hospital’s open field, sitting them on a wheelchair and taking them out for a walk while they conversed.
Admittedly, Ena liked those days a lot more. It felt like such a nice change of pace from sitting around in the hospital room all day long.
“I still can’t believe you found out that my sister got engaged, before I found out!” Mizuki declared one day, with a childish pout that only made Ena teasingly laugh. They headed to their usual spot in the field, where Ena parked Mizuki’s wheelchair beside a bench she sat on. Mizuki continued their ramble. “And she got engaged to a French guy! Agh, it’s too bad she left before I could even pester her about it.”
“Well, maybe if someone didn’t play Sleeping Beauty for five years, we wouldn’t be having this discussion,” Ena flatly responded. Though she meant it as a lighthearted joke, they had only recently become comfortable with joking around Mizuki’s situation. Ena knew that the talk they had did them good, and joking around like they used to would only help them in moving forward. Even if it was a slow process, Ena was willing to accommodate whatever Mizuki needed to keep on going.
Mizuki laughed, pretending to be hurt.
Every time Mizuki laughed from the bottom of their heart, just like in that moment, Ena could only feel nothing but relief. She couldn’t bite back a small smile, once again thinking about how it was worth waiting the five years to be able to hear Mizuki’s laugh. “I missed that,” she unconsciously said out loud, only realizing too late when the grin on Mizuki’s face shifted. She was about to get it now.
“Oh? What was that, Enanan?”
Shit .
“You heard nothing.” Ena kept her straight face as intact as she possibly could.
“Wow, Enanan! I didn’t think you loved me that much!”
“Shut the hell up,” Ena retorted, glaring at her wheelchair-confined friend who only held their stomach laughing. Tears were beginning to form in Mizuki’s eyes, as they futilely wiped it away with their arm. “Just because you haven’t mentally aged in five years doesn’t mean I’ll let you get away with your stupid teasing.”
But Mizuki only smirked, causing Ena to burn up to the top of her head. “Sure, Ena. Didn’t you just say you missed me, though?”
That earned a light smack on Mizuki’s shoulder, followed by Ena’s own giggles.
“But…. It’s true, though,” Ena whispered, enough for Mizuki to barely catch through their own laughter. Perhaps it had been at the spur of the moment when Ena decided to finally spill her thoughts honestly. “You’re insufferable but it’s better than you being asleep. I missed that stupid laugh of yours. The way you’re able to fix up clothing like it’s magic. Even just the way you talk. I missed it all.”
“Ena?” Mizuki’s laugh died down, taking note of how serious Ena was at that moment. But Ena only smiled.
“I’m truly glad you woke up, Mizuki.”
The breeze picked up, and Mizuki smiled in return. A smile that Ena loved seeing.
“Thank you for waiting for me, Ena.”