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Norton is lost.
For a long, terrifying moment, he can't see, can't breathe. Everything is dark, and his throat and lungs are on fire, and he wonders dazedly if he's back under the rocks, bones pounded into dust and flesh crushed into smithereens. Then he thinks of the glow of red eyes, knives and axes and hooks driven deep into his body to rip his spine out.
Norton sits up, hands flying out behind him to prop himself up. As he breathes rapidly, his eyes adjust enough for him to make out the glow of the small oil lamp on the nearby bedside table. He follows the glow of its soft rays to plastered walls and rumpled bedsheets. Real bedsheets, not the scratchy sort they used to have. His throat loosens up just a little bit. He can breathe again.
Norton scoots up until his back is propped against the headboard of the bed. A real bed too, sturdy and wooden. He should know; he carved it out himself- though to be fair, he was following detailed and slightly confusing blueprints. Pine for the frame and oak for the headboard. He curls his hands into the bottom of his shirt and exhales. It's fine. It's fine. He's fine.
. . .
God.
He's really fucked up.
Norton swings his legs over the side of the bed and buries his face in his hands. He's not supposed to be doing this anymore. He should be grateful to still be alive. Each day a fucking blessing, right? What kind of blessing? He spends half of his time in mental pain and the other half in physical. He wonders if perhaps he's better off dead anyway. Shouldn't have fought so hard to survive. What's waiting for him at the end of it?
"Norton?"
Ah, shit. He really is selfish. Norton smiles into the darkness wryly and answers without turning around. "Yeah?"
The sheets stir behind him. Hr can't see Luca, but he can feel him, slender fingers gently pressing into his shoulders. He hadn't realized how tight they were, but as Luca runs his knuckles across them and pushes, he feels some of the tension release and groans in spite of himself, relaxing into the touch.
"Another nightmare?" Luca asks, clicking his tongue. His hands settle on either side of Norton's neck, smoothing up and down over the bones that protrude down the base.
"No," Norton lies.
Luca sighs. "It's normal, you know. After everything. Physiologically, even-"
"Physiologically my ass, I told you I'm fine," Norton says roughly. "Go back to sleep, Luca."
For a long, terrifying moment, Norton thinks that Luca really will go back to sleep. He knows the inventor would never have forgiven him for speaking that way at the start of the relationship. He turns around to peer over his shoulder but finds only a grey eye staring back at him, stained gold by the lamplight.
Norton's heart twists. He looks down. "Sorry."
Luca sighs. "Look at me."
He slides a finger under Norton's chin when the prospector doesn't obey, running over the thin layer of stubble forming at his jawline and tilting his head back up. "Norton."
"I know." Norton tries to get away, but Luca holds him still.
"Norton," he repeats. "What did you see?"
Norton bites at his bottom lip and tries to look away again. This time, Luca lets him.
"Don't remember." It's only a half lie. He knows he saw something for sure, but what it was remains a mystery. Norton's sure he doesn't want to remember.
"Did you take the medicine?" Luca reclines back against the wall, eyes slipping shut for a moment before shooting open again.
Norton thinks about lying again, but the little spark that Luca sends up his arm is enough of a reminder. "No."
"You know, it's really supposed to help," Luca points out.
"With what?" Norton laughs scornfully. "C'mon, Luca. It might knock me out, but it doesn't help the real problems."
Luca purses his lips, and Norton feels a flash of guilt as he remembers Luca shared some of the experiences with him, knows too well how it feels. It isn't the same, because he wasn't in the mines, but the rest is still awful as it is. It piles up and up and up. He tugs at his hair, winding the curls around and around his finger till his scalp stings. "Face it," he says at last. "We'll never be normal."
"I don't want to be normal. Why should we care about that?" Luca turns up his nose with a huff. "I don't recall normality being a necessity for life. Besides, I'm much too smart to be normal, and you're much too handsome."
Norton pushes him half-heartedly, laying back down next to him. Luca pulls him closer until his head is on the inventor's chest, fingers running through his hair and soothing the spots he tugged at moments earlier. "I just..." He hesitates. "I want to be normal sometimes. Just you 'nd me doing normal things, living normal lives."
"Such as?" Norton can practically hear Luca raising a brow, and he snorts into his chest. "I don't know. You're the genius here. You tell me."
"Normal people talk to each other," Luca tells him helpfully. "When something is wrong, they talk about it. They help each other."
Norton buries his face until his nose is shoved up against Luca's sternum. "I'm trying."
"As am I." Luca's fingers falter against his hair. "Norton..."
Norton shakes his head. "Don't," he says quietly.
Luca falls silent again, resuming his rhythms through Norton's tufty curls. Norton closes his eyes again and breathes in Luca's scent, sharp like sparking metal and much more welcome than the tang of blood. As he drifts back into vague slumber, it seems to him that Luca's arms tighten around him, ever so slightly.