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He's falling.
He's falling, and there is no one to save them. No one to get him out of the hell they call his karmic debt. No, there's no one at all, and there's nothing he can do.
It's clawing at him; they notice and feel the stinging fresh on their skin as he's bound by the tight ropes of his debt, holding on as though their' life' depended on it.
Maybe this time, he's willing to let karma do its job and end him. End what they call a pathetic life and returns home with his siblings. Liyue is safe, they deem. The contract is long fulfilled, he thinks. Maybe it is time to let go of what he has become. The end seems better than trying to keep living as something he is not.
He had lost track of time, thinking it had been a few hours since he's been bound to the debt and now finally losing the energy to fight back against it. They don't remember where they were, considering he was out fighting the demons that roamed around. Maybe they were in a cave or deep underwater, which would be some miracle, maybe even on the tallest point of Liyue Harbor's mountains.
Xiao stared, letting the karmic debt slowly wrap around his body more than before. He had no energy despite all that, the effects of being dormant for so long coming in waves one at a time. There was no point in saving himself, and he readily accepted that fact.
Albeit, deep down, Xiao knew there was more he could have done, and they could have stopped this all if they wished to. He could have long returned to Wangshu Inn, where his lover resides, possibly waiting for their return.
I apologize, Aether… if I could, I would be there for you. But now, I have long given up what one would call a life.
Aether waited. He waited and waited, worry and anger growing inside him bit by bit as the days passed without a single word or sight from his lover. He had gone out to do his daily cleanups, they said. Do not wait upon them and sleep, he said.
It's been nearly six days since Xiao last came back, and Aether had barely slept those days. At most, he is likely running on a total of twenty hours, mainly because Paimon had made the traveler sleep on the third day Xiao wasn't back.
"Traveler, you should eat something! Paimon knows you've barely eaten, especially because Xiao isn't here!" The fairy spoke, her voice softer than its usual high-pitched tone one would say is annoying.
He sighed, tiredness coating his every bone once again as he walked away from the balcony in the room. Paimon was right, Aether hadn't been able to do much because of Xiao's sudden disappearance, and he didn't think he would be able to until he saw his lover again.
Anger was rising in him again, but not at Xiao, at himself. He was stupid, really, for letting the other leave alone when he knew that Xiao was more likely to enter a depressive episode. They came to Xiao often, three times a month at best, but it's been happening more often than both of them can manage.
The blonde didn't understand, he could go to some extent, but he couldn't fully understand no matter how hard he tried. Did Aether do something? Was he that overbearing that Xiao began to stop telling him things?
He tried to be there for Xiao as his lover and best friend, but it was nearly impossible to do so if Xiao never opened up. And it bothered Aether, it irritated him to no end, but he also knew that the blue-headed male could handle himself, albeit not in the best ways.
It's not like I can be mad at him; he's had his problems even before I came along... I just wished he'd open up more quickly.
Aether sighed, looking at Paimon before speaking up; "I'm going to go out and look for Xiao; stay here."
It was all so painful. The ropes began to burn, the air smelt of smoke, and Xiao still felt so dormant. They guessed this would have happened all those decades ago if he had let the debt overrun him.
All Xiao could see was red, a dark-blooded red. Maybe this is what he deserved, to be burnt like some piece of meat that others would probably not eat.
The burning continued, probably already causing marks to form on his pale skin. Old and new scars also began to hurt, stinging here and there but not enough to cause even more pain to Xiao.
How long has it been already? Maybe, if Xiao had to guess, it would have been three hours at best. Three hours since he decided to let the karma consume him. Three hours since he saw moonlight. Four hours since he went to do his duties and leave Aether.
Aether…
His beloved lover, the other a practical ray of sunshine in Xiao's darkest moments. Even with all the things they had done, Aether still managed to love Xiao.
They never questioned it, at least not verbally anyway. All questions would always stay in his head; no need to ask why Aether would ever love someone like him.
Alas, he had fallen for the blonde and vice versa, that was established.
"Aether.." Xiao mumbled, his eyes dull as the once-burning pain began to die, and the stinging stopped. Was this how peace felt? Is this how Xiao finally leaves the face of Teyvat, consumed by his karmic debt?
Liyue is safe. Zhongli, the retired Geo Archon, is now living as an immortal mortal. Ganyu could proceed with her life as she wished. Aether… would Aether continue his journey to find his twin sister?
Xiao would hope so. He wouldn't wish to be an unforgiving burden on Aether, knowing that the other has his travels to continue and end.
Xiao sighed and eventually began to fall. The pain went away, the feeling of numbness overcoming the male came quickly, and he fell.
He would not regret letting himself fall into what he thought would be a void. The feeling is nice….
" XIAO!"
Aether was sure he'd check every part of Liyue at this point. Yet even with his efforts, there was no sighting of Xiao anywhere.
Where the hell are you? Aether wondered as he searched Dunyu Ruins once again. Even with his elemental sight, Aether could not get a trace of Xiao, so it mostly led to him using his skills.
Aether groaned, finding his lover was more irritated than he had expected for it to be. His patience has begun to wear thin, and he's pretty sure he would have snapped had he brought Paimon with him.
There was only so much that Aether knew he could do before he got lost in his heavy emotions and did irrational things, purposefully or not.
Opening his map, the blonde looked at the places he marked before looking at the one unmarked area — Mount. Aozang
Using the teleport waypoint, Aether teleported to Mt. Aozang and began looking around. The air felt tense as Aether looked around and called for Xiao's name. There was something wrong here, and the blonde couldn't tell what it was.
Cloud Retainer seemed to have sensed Aether's presence because she had appeared behind Aether and spoke, "If you are looking for your lover, I would suggest climbing to the top of the mountain. He has been dormant there the past few days."
Her voice was as fair as ever, but Aether could also sense unease. Nodding, he thanked her before beginning his climb up the mountain the Adeptus calls her home.
From there, something was wrong. The air was dense in only this part of the mountain, and one could see that some grass was burnt as well. Looking a bit, Aether saw his lover. He seemed to be sitting at the very edge of the mountain.
His eyes were closed, his face looking peaceful but in pain. Aether could see marks on his skin, burn marks, to be exact. Fear began to eat at Aether, a shiver running down his spine as he saw just how… strange Xiao looked.
"Xiao? Xiao, are you there…?" Aether asked. He felt dumb, really, asking the question, knowing that there was a possibility Xiao was not there mentally. Deep down, he knew there was a possibility Xiao was dealing with his debt once again.
Looking away, Aether tried to see if there was anything he could use at his disposal to possibly wake his lover. Though, when he turned back around, Xiao wasn't sitting on the ledge anymore.
"Xiao?" He looked down the cliff,
"XIAO!"
Xiao opened his eyes, and a sense of tranquility set into his soul as he looked around his surroundings. There was grass surrounding him, Qingxing flowers surrounding him as they sat up and looked around.
Where was he?
"Xiao? Is that you?" A feminine voice spoke, a familiar aura surrounding Xiao as he looked behind them.
"Bonanus?" Xiao said, his eyes growing wide as they saw their dear sister stare at him with happiness and sadness built into one.
He stood up, his legs feeling slightly wobbly as they made their way to their sister. "Bonanus, is that.. really you?"
"Oh Xiao.. what are you doing here? It's not your time to be here, especially not alone," She said, her voice soft as Xiao had remembered it all those millennia. Her eyes, blue and radiant as ever as she looked at her brother with such tenderness, he was sure he could cry then and there.
"Alone? What do you mean by that?"
"Xiao now is not your time to be here… especially when you have your lover to be with. His grief is strong enough to cause a war if it wanted to." Bonanus stated, "I know you wish to be here with me and the others, but you are needed in the mortal world."
"I do not need to be there… no one needs to be there, Bo; I have given my all; I am no longer needed," Xiao said, voice low and rough, but it was enough for the blue Adeptus to hear.
"No, Xiao, you are needed. Mayhaps not by the people of Liyue, but by Aether ."
"How do you…."
"Alatus, listen here; you are not a burden nor unneeded. You have people that care significantly about you, just as you care about them. If not them, then him."
Bonanus grabbed Xiao's hand, put something in it, and closed his hand into a fist. It was a cold feeling, but Xiao knew it was one of Bonanus's many hand-crafted hair clips. She always had a habit of making things when she could.
"Promise me, Xiao, that you will always stay with the traveler. Although he is not of this world, I can tell he makes you happy. May you promise me this?"
Xiao nodded, his words no longer forming as he reluctantly hugged their sister. It was a silent thank you from him, unsaid words in that single action, and the Hydro Adeptus could think as she hugged the Anemo Adeptus back.
"Tell the others I say hello for me, please. This is… a see you soon, correct?" He asked, and he could see that his sister smiled and nodded before a bright light took over his sight.
"See you soon, Xiao."
"Xiao! Xiao, wake up, please! You can't leave me like this, Xiao!" Aether yelled, heavy sobs racking his body as he held onto Xiao tightly, shaking him now and then to hopefully wake him up.
Aether had teleported the two somewhere more closed off and hidden, hoping to get some time with the Adeptus before he went out to find Zhongli or anyone that could help the two. Grief was overcoming him, the anguish of possibly losing his most precious lover.
Fear was also clawing at him; nothing seemed to have been going well for Aether. He finally found his lover, only for them to be possibly dead in his arms. "God damnit, Xiao, please, wake up! You can't just leave me for six days and try to die!"
"Aether…?" A rough voice spoke, raspy on some ends from not being used for nearly a week.
Xiao was awake. He was finally awake.
"Xiao! You're awake! You dumbass, why would you do that? What made you think it was a good idea?" Aether nearly yelled, tears streaming down his face as he hugged his lover.
Xiao stared at him, holding onto the crying male by his waist as the latter cried into his shoulder. They weren't sure what to say, words driven away once again as he absorbed just how terrible Aether's emotions were.
"Aether… I've only been gone for three hours; why are you so upset…." Xiao asked, confusion seeping through as he pulled Aether back to wipe his tears.
"Three hours- Xiao, no, it's been six days since you left! Six! And you dare to tell me that was three? What did I tell you, Xiao? I need you. I need you to be honest with me, I need you to stop running from your issues, and I need you to confide in me more. You could have been dead if I couldn't catch you as you fell down the cliff-" He took a quick breath before going on, "I could have lost you, Xiao, and I don't think you would have cared. Would you? Are you so stuck on thinking that people don't care about you that you forget I am right here , your lover ?!"
Xiao gaped at the blonde, knowing that if he said anything else, it could anger the other more than he already was. Waiting til Aether calmed down, Xiao spoke up,
"I'm sorry, Ae… I didn't think it would matter-"
"And that's where you're wrong because it would matter. It would matter to me, to Paimon, to Zhongli- It would have mattered to everyone you know. Please, Xiao… I can't see you suffering from your karmic debt when I'm here to help you…."
There was a lot Xiao could say, but he couldn't. The words stayed lodged in his throat against their own will. Regardless, all Xiao could do was hold onto Aether until he knew they were ready to make their way to Wangshu Inn. Silently and quickly, Xiao put the hair clip in Aether's hair, the windwheel aster design going well with his hair.
I'm sorry, Aether…