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For once, Hizashi is having a quiet evening. All his students’ English papers have been graded, the next playlist for Put Your Hands Up Radio is done, their cats Melonpan and Mochi are both well fed and resting on his laps. Shouta is visiting his grandma, which means he doesn’t need to worry about his safety, no patrol tonight!
He chose a cooking show. While being very fond of them, his skills on the matter are not improving, so he ordered noodles from Haru’s. Maybe that’s because the show focuses more on spectacular techniques and competition drama than actual cooking… Shouta is more a fan of the Gordon Ramsey show. His evil grin widening when the angry chef starts yelling.
Mochi, the younger cat, suddenly raises his head, staring at the door. That usually means the delivery man is about to knock! Hizashi gets up, but before he can reach it, the door opens, and a soaked Shouta comes in. He squats in the entrance, his back resting on the door, and stares at his shoes, but won’t untie them. His wavy hair is dripping on the blue and white tiles. His civil clothes, simple jeans and black T-shirt, are also soaked, like he walked the whole way from Nahurata to here.
- Shou?... I don’t know if you are not talking, or if I cannot hear you.
Hizashi had been hard of hearing since his early childhood, as his quirk activated at birth, while his eardrums were not ready for such a shock. Shouta’s bass voice is usually easier for him to hear, and his diction is impeccable. So the Voice Hero usually puts down his hearing aids when he gets home to have some rest from the parasite noises and buzz. Plus, Shouta started to learn JSL as soon as his first year at UA, shortly after meeting his soulmate.
- I… (then he remembers to raise his head and look at Hizashi), I’m sorry. I’m coming. I think I had a bit of a panic attack… and I kept walking as fast as I could instead of taking the subway home.
- Alright then, just classic Shouta behavior. I was afraid you got hurt on your way home. Naruhata is getting weird those days…
Rumors about a new drug gave Eraser Head and Tsukauchi extra work those last few weeks. But the investigation gave no result so far.
Shouta slowly gets up and rid of his wet clothes. His blond partner moves toward the kitchen and puts the kettle on. He brews herbal tea for himself, and a black coffee for Shouta with the French press. For some reason this man cannot go to bed without his evening coffee… And French Press is the system that liberates the most caffeine in a single cup. Is it the reason French people are so angry all the time?
Shouta reappears in the living room wearing his favorite pajamas: pink track pants and an oversized black tank top. The last one, showing a lot of shoulders, usually drives Hizashi a bit crazy. But tonight, Shouta looks like he’s been hit by the metaphorical truck. He crashes on the couch with a heavy sigh. The blond comes to him with both cups, and attempts a kiss on the chick, that’s welcomed by a low grunt.
- One of those nights, I see…
- No cuddles, I fear… I kinda… I almost had a fight with Nona…
- I beg your pardon?
- Oh, we used to fight a lot, when I was younger… and dumber…
- Yeah but… I thought things were better now?
- It was… But you know how some topics are off limit.
- Just tell me what happened then.
Shouta’s hair hides his face as he leans toward his coffee, both hands wrapped around the mug, eyes closed, to enjoy the smell of freshly grounded beans. He always had a hard time speaking out about conflict and feelings. Hizashi learned to give him time, and, as hard as it is for him, let the silence set in. After a while, Shouta raises his head again:
- She was talking about neighborhood gossip. Mostly about her friends’ children and grandchildren, what they do for work, who they date, who is getting married. I just let her speak, I genuinely thought she just wanted to chat about it. Then her voice changed, and she asked, “what about you?”
- Ho…
- I asked, “what about what?” and maybe it came out rude, I don’t know… but she sighed and threw her hands in the air like I said something stupid. She said, “You’re still living with a roommate, when are you going to grow up and find a nice girlfriend?”
- Well… she didn’t bring up this topic for a long time…
- And that’s why we were happy and not fighting anymore!
- That couldn’t last for long… You’ll eventually have to come out to her…
- I don’t understand why she would need me too! She won’t like it anyway!
- But right now, she thinks you are lonely, that’s why she keeps talking about it.
- Only because her definition of “happy” is doing the same things the children of her friends did. Anyway, why do you take her side?
- I don’t! You said you didn’t understand her, so I come up with what I think are her reasons… I don’t say she’s right! She just has a different perspective… plus she doesn’t have the whole story!
- Right! And that’s why I seriously considered telling her. So I can cut out with all the secrets and bullshit “roommate” situation.
- Oh dear…
- And then I wondered about her reaction… and then I wondered what would happen if I did. And… suddenly I couldn’t speak at all. But she kept talking and talking about this neighbor, this cousin, someone else’s wedding… She always talks about what everybody else is doing. She used to be proud of me you know?
- I guess she still is…
- She has a funny way to show it. For a while, she was happy to have bragging rights about me getting into UA, and getting into the hero course… She was not that happy when I chose to become an underground hero, it’s hard to brag about that…
- I guess right now all your former schoolmates are getting married, or having kids…
- Right, everyone but me. And I don’t know what would hurt her more: thinking I chose to be single for life, or knowing I’m gay.
- I don’t know either… she never said anything hurtful in front of me, and I’ve been openly bi for a while, on live TV and radio.
- Because you are not her only grandson. She’s not like one of those awful anti-lgbt activist who try to make everybody miserable. But she’s not exactly an ally either. The things she’s said while watching tv with me… when the news talked about the Pride, or when there’s a gay character on her tv shows… She wouldn’t dare say that in someone’s face. But I know her true colors know. And they are not freaking rainbow!
- … so, what do you want to do?
- What I want, is not to lose her. She’s my only family.
- Ignorance is bliss, they say…
- What happened to being proud?
- I cannot tell you how to deal with your family. I have supportive parents, and a gay uncle who always supported me. I have no idea how things would have turn out without them…
- Maybe you would be all gloomy, smoking too much, and fighting with your grandma…
- And I would use coffee as a therapy, and use a capture weapon as a blanky?
Hizashi’s tea is resting on the table, cold. Shouta clings to his cup. The cats, acting as stress detectors, are glued to his side, purring to their maximum capacity. When it comes to his family, Shouta tends to avoid conflict, make himself scarce or straight up disappear for months. His grandma basically raised him, and there’s no way Shouta will ever confront her on that topic. That would be opening Pandora’s box. He would have to deal with the reality he has been wondering about for years. “Would she still love me if…”.
Shouta’s lids are fluttering, but his mind keeps him awake with anxiety.
- Shou… we are not finding a solution to this problem tonight… you need to sleep.
- I need to have a solution to this problem SO I can sleep.
Hizashi keeps an eye on him for the rest of the night. When Shouta slightly leans on a side of the couch, he puts a heavy blanket on him. 5 minutes later, he can hear him snoring. It was a logical ruse! There’s no reason Eraser Head would be the only one to use them!
A few weeks later, Shouta decided that it was not logical to cling to a conditional love and came out to his grandma. He didn’t let Hizashi accompany him in case she would be mean. He later described the conversation that followed as “a shipwreck”. She cried, yelled, had a one-way conversation with God, yelled more, asked what she did wrong… Eventually Shouta found 3 seconds of silence to interject that he’s happy as he is, that he’s not sick, has a loving partner and… Nona yelled some more.
After a few hours of yelling, Shouta decided that it was not logical to try to speak with someone unwilling to listen.
Hizashi planned a sweet escape vacation with Midnight and Tensei acting as emotional support friends. It showed that brooding over one’s Mojito on the beach is healthier for Shouta than brooding over his coffee at 3 in the morning on the couch.
After a few weeks of acting like the sky fell on her head and Shouta didn’t exist anymore, Nona Aizawa decided it was not logical to lose her only grandchild over something none of them can change.
It took a long time, finding her an LGBT-supporting church, watching 5 seasons of One Day at a Time, long talks over high quality coffee…
She ended up admitting Shouta and her are far more alike than she would admit. She left her family at 16 over a fight about the man she would marry. She took typing lessons so she could get a job, while it was frowned upon at the time. She refused to come back home without an apology from her mother.
- You found him, your soulmate, right?
- Yes, I did.
- Nothing anyone could say would change that, right?
- Nothing.
- I loved your grandfather, you know that…
- I do.
- I… won’t make things more difficult anymore. My mother made the mistake with me, then I drove your mother away…
- She did make some decisions herself…
- You are kind…
- Don’t tell that to anyone, I have a reputation to maintain!
- What about my reputation as an old-school catholic grandma, now that my grandson is engaged to a flamboyant DJ?
- Well, are you going to harass us about adopting many grand kids?
- Of course, I will!
And then, the EraserMic family adopted many, many problem children.
The end.