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“Spirits, I missed you.”
Toph rolled her eyes and shoved Sokka off of her as she bit a smile back. “Yeah, yeah. I guess I missed you too.”
“You did.” Sokka nodded, shrugging his bags back onto his shoulders. “I can tell. You missed me. There’s no guesswork to it, Beifong. You missed me just as much as I missed you, if not more, so come off it.”
“If I did miss you, you’ve already ruined it, so.”
With a hearty laugh, Sokka pulled Toph into his chest again and she didn’t hesitate to wrap her arms around him and melt into his embrace this time around. After nearly a year of not seeing each other, only communicating via staticky radio and impersonal letters, it felt right to have her in his arms.
It felt right to be back.
He couldn’t resist pressing a kiss to the crown of her head before they started walking toward her apartment. She’d so graciously offered him the World’s Comfiest Couch after he found out that he was going to return to Republic City and had nowhere to stay. He’d been renting out his own apartment, but when he left for the South to help out his father’s successor get a handle on the title of chieftain for the better part of a year, he had to turn it in.
Katara had offered a room in the fire palace to him, but he didn’t much feel like going off to the Fire Nation for some reason. That reason being Toph.
While he missed his sister, he really didn’t want to spend any more time away from his best friend if he could help it, and Toph seemingly felt the same way, though she’d never actually tell him that unless they were on death’s door.
His chest was warm as they walked in silence to her place, his arm around her shoulders and hers around his waist. The physical reaction to her was confusing him, and he wondered why it was that he was feeling this odd swirl in his stomach. The only other times he’d felt this around Toph was years ago and he accepted that they weren’t going to be anything. Ever. So he put it all out of his mind and he thought he was over it—he valued their friendship more, of course.
Quickly, he shook it off and concentrated on catching up with her, despite knowing most of her goings-on. He never tired of hearing her talk to him, he never would.
She told him about Lin and little Suyin and the way they’d grown so fast. He could tell that she was trying to keep her pride and affection for her two daughters at bay as she spoke, and that made him smile. It was evident how much she loved her kids, no matter how much she’d complained about anyone under the age of fifteen. Those girls were her everything and it made him so happy to see that they made her happy.
Lin was nearly seven years old already and Suyin—who he had seen just after she was born before he had to leave for the South Pole—was just on the edge of a year old. This wave of giddiness washed over him as the anticipation to see them again grew stronger as they neared Toph’s apartment. They must have grown so, so much from the last time he saw them.
Toph made sure that Lin spoke with him whenever she could, and it touched him that Lin was excited to do so. Whenever she got home from school, she would pick up the radiophone, tune to the channel Toph and Sokka communicated on for the most part, and would loudly yell into the receiver, “Uncle Sokka, it’s Lin! I’m bored!” or something of similar flair. At that, he would drop everything he was doing to have a chat with the Beifong girl, and then, when she was all talked out, he and Toph would chat for hours just as they did every other day.
Despite not having been around her for months on end, he felt himself closer to her than ever before, even closer than they had been after everything they’d been through together.
Absence made the heart grow fonder, he supposed.
They were beginning to close in on her building and it took them no time to step into her apartment. He could hear how the girls’ sitter hummed as she finished up in the kitchen and he saw the way she startled when the door shut in Toph’s wake.
“Oh Miss Toph—”
“Lane, please.”
“Um, Toph,” the sitter, Lane, corrected. “The girls are in bed right now, but I anticipate they’ll be up soon to see you. Lin, particularly, was asking after you.”
Sokka glanced at Toph, who had a small smile on her face at the information as she nodded and bade the sitter a good night. But not before slipping her a payment that Lane tried to refuse.
Once they were alone, Sokka grinned and sped over to where he remembered Lin’s bedroom was, Toph right behind him. He entered the room quietly, his grin widening when he saw Lin splayed out on her bed, her hair a mess, and one of her legs outside of the blanket while the rest of her body remained covered.
With no pause, Sokka walked up to her bed and crouched next to her. She was drooling and he almost—almost—felt bad for repeatedly and obnoxiously poking her plump cheek to rouse her from her clearly deep slumber.
She was groggy for a few seconds until she sat up with a grumpy look on her face and rubbed her eyes. When she focused on him, her sleepy eyes widened and she threw herself on him, making him topple over onto the ground, laughing.
“Uncle Sokka!”
He closed his arms around her tightly as he sat up with her still clinging to his neck. “I take it you missed me then?”
“I did miss you! So much,” she admitted. “I thought you were never coming back.”
Her words, though light, made him feel this pang of sadness deep in his gut. The fact that he made her feel that way brought him a great deal of regret and even though he knew that he had to go back home for a good reason, he still felt bad for leaving them.
One of the reasons he wanted to return to Republic City before the year was up was because, after he spent most of his time longing to be around them and his family, he realized how much he needed them. Toph had been such a significant part of his life from such a young age that he didn’t know how to function without her anymore. And Lin came around and then Su and they became just as important to him.
The girls—Lin, specifically because Su was barely holding herself up when she’d met him—began to look up to him and he found that wanted to be there for them; he found himself missing them as though he himself had fathered them both. There was this overwhelming love he felt for them and he couldn’t bring himself to be away from them and from Toph and from his family any longer.
So he came back. For them.
And selfishly, for himself. He needed them.
“I was always going to come back,” Sokka finally replied, hugging Lin more tightly, his voice betraying the emotion he was feeling. He cleared his throat. “Can’t be away from you guys for too long.”
“If you leave again, you better bring me with you.”
He chuckled, hearing Toph stifle her own laugh behind them. “Deal.”
For a while, the three of them sat on the ground as Sokka listened to Lin go on about her time at school and what she’d done throughout the year he’d been away. He knew all of this already, but it was refreshing to him to hear it all in person, to be able to see how animatedly she spoke, how similar to her mother she was. It made his heart swell.
They left the room after much protest from the seven-year-old to leave her to her slumber, which despite her objections came fairly quickly, then Toph led Sokka into her bedroom, where Suyin’s crib stood beside her bed.
As he approached, he was able to hear the nine-month-old’s soft snores and he almost cooed aloud. He peeked over the rails to find the tiniest human he’d encountered in a while and tiny though she was, she had grown so much in the months he’d been away that his breath caught in his throat at the sight of her.
He resisted the urge to pick her up and carry her around because she was so sound asleep, and unlike Lin, Suyin wouldn’t knock out the way her sister had just done moments ago.
“I know what you’re thinking,” Toph said quietly from behind him. “You’re not waking her.”
“I’m not!” he whisper-shouted. “I wasn’t!”
“You so were.”
He sighed and turned to her. “I was.”
“Mhm,” she hummed, then laughed. “If she wakes up in the middle of the night asking for a bottle, you can do the honors of feeding her.”
“You think it’s a punishment, but I’m happy to do it, you know that,” he told her sincerely. When Su was born, he stayed with her for a few days to make sure that she got enough sleep, so he would tend to Su overnight whenever she woke up. It wasn’t a chore for him; he enjoyed it, seeing her drink her bottle and her little eyes flutter shut as she fell asleep.
Toph just hummed again and sent him to the bathroom for a shower, claiming that he smelled like shit. Sokka furrowed his brows, taking offense to the comment until he lifted his arm and took a whiff. With a face of disgust at his body odor, he stepped into the shower, cleaned up, and emerged refreshed.
“Do you have any sheets I can use?” he asked her as he towel-dried his drenched hair. “And that really fluffy blanket. You know the one.”
She scoffed. “You’re not sleeping on the couch, Snoozles, come on.”
“Huh?”
“I love fucking with you, but I would never make you sleep on a couch after traveling. Sleep with me. It’s fine.”
Sokka gulped, finding himself nervous to a degree. “Are—really? You sure?”
“Of course I am. It’s also not like we haven’t shared a bed before.” A snort. “So yeah, sleep here… just don’t snore. If you wake Su, I might kill you.”
“Sounds like a plan, Beifong.”
Toph smiled winningly at him before socking him on the arm and disappearing into her bathroom to get herself ready for bed.
He sighed, running his hand through his wet hair and depositing himself hesitantly onto the right side of her bed, crossing his legs at his ankles and staring up at the popcorn ceiling. His mind was quiet, the fatigue that had been building up all day falling over him at that moment. He let his eyes flutter shut and it wasn’t until Toph threw herself on the bed next to him, flicked his forehead, and wished him a good night that he noted the hot tightness in his chest.
He fought all night to ignore it.
They fell into an easy routine after a month.
Sokka was happy to be sharing an apartment with Toph, and he believed that she felt the same way because she didn’t complain, and he knew that she would’ve had she minded his stay. But she didn’t and he was grateful.
He even suggested that he should probably go elsewhere, likely to the palace with Zuko and Katara or to Air Temple Island, but she shut him down with a shake of her head and a dismissive hand, telling him to not be stupid, that she didn’t mind the company and the help with the girls.
Still, he promised her that he would try looking for a place of his own. When he told her, she rolled her eyes and said, “Don’t do it on my account.”
He didn’t want to leave, and Toph was making it easy for him not to.
A part of him wished she wouldn’t, just so he could have an excuse—a good one—to take off and ignore the warmth and pangs in his chest whenever he thought about her or looked at her or was near her in private, without the worry of her somehow discovering his inner conflict.
But again, he was fine where he was. He just wished that he didn’t feel this way.
It didn’t help that he was, after thirty-three days, still sleeping on the right side of her bed. He’d wake up with his legs tangled with hers and her head settled comfortably on his chest, her hair tickling his nose.
It really didn’t help matters.
One day, he’d returned to Toph’s place from paying Katara a visit after he’d finished out his day at City Hall. He’d managed to get his position and title back because the person they’d put in his place kind of sucked at his job. The council people were elated to hear that he’d come back a month prior and he was happy to see them groveling when it came to negotiating the terms of his employment.
He was exhausted, but he was happy to realize that Toph was already home along with the girls. When he walked in, he saw Lin laying her head on her mom’s lap as Toph held a sleeping Su in her arms. The smell of their favorite takeout filled his nose and he sighed contentedly as he dropped his messenger bag and plopped down next to his favorite girls.
Toph’s hand was stroking her eldest daughter’s head as she spoke in hushed tones about her day at school when they greeted him. Lin immediately sat up to hug him and make herself comfortable on his lap, which he didn’t mind in the slightest bit.
“I got us Kwong’s; our usual,” Toph told him quietly so as to not wake Su. “I’m just going to get this one down for the night and we can eat.”
It warmed Sokka how different she was with the girls, so sweet and tender and so naturally motherly. At first glance, one would look at Toph and think that she’s not the mother type, but anyone who knows her—really knows her—would be quick to shut that down. She was the best kind of mother, the one that was their kids’ friend but that also knew how to separate the friendliness from the motherhood of it all. It was evident how she loved her kids and it was one of the reasons why he loved her so.
His eyes widened a bit at the thought as he watched her stand up with Su asleep on her chest, and make her way out of the room to take the baby to her crib. His heart swelled, this all-too-familiar warm and fuzzy feeling taking residence in its favorite place in his chest again.
No. No, no, no. Simply no.
He shook his head. Toph’s his best friend. That was it. She had kids and she had a whole job and life and will probably have someone else to fall for eventually. If she ever decided to let anyone in and get back out into the dating pool that is.
She wasn’t someone Sokka could ever let himself fall for, despite the whirling in his stomach that he feels when they were together that he’d been feeling since he returned. He’d been trying to snap himself out of it—having suddenly seen her in this New Light as if he’d never seen her in that way before then—but it wasn’t working.
Nothing. Was. Working. And he was being driven to drink.
He knew that he’d been feeling this way for a bit, but it got worse when she told him how invaluable he is to her—and to the girls, as she had added in haste—a few weeks ago. It was as if he had some kind of a desire to be praised and she’d answered it and he couldn’t get it out of his head.
And he also couldn’t get the idea of them being more than what they are out of his head either.
It wasn’t as if she’d never told him how much she appreciated him and whatever else, but it kind of hit him differently that day.
It was in the way she said it.
Admittedly, he’d ventured to imagine what a relationship with Toph would be like. He’d thought about how much sense it would make for the two best friends since childhood to end up together and be a family and whatnot. He’d also thought about what comes with it, such as the time they would spend together, what they would do, their intimacies.
And oh, had he thought about their intimacies…
He scolded himself whenever he got that far, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t fantasize about it. About her. About them.
He shouldn’t have, but he did.
None of that mattered, though, because what she really needed was a friend. Someone she was able to lean on, and that was what he’d always been to her. It was all he’d ever be, and he supposed that he was okay with it because he just wanted her in his life, even if it wasn’t at the capacity he was making himself believe he wanted her.
Very suddenly, a wad of wet parchment hit him straight in the face, startling him out of the daze he was in for the past five minutes at least.
“You’ve been staring into space for, like, ever, Uncle Sokka,” Lin said with an eye roll that rivaled her mother’s. “What good are you to me if you don’t play with me?”
Sokka had to purse his lips to keep himself from laughing at her sassiness and nodded at her. “You know what? You’re right. How will you ever forgive me, Lady Lin?”
She brought her finger to her chin and tapped as she thought of a response to him, making him have to resist the urge to smile. Then, she gasped. “Mama said that she’s going to be busy this week and that she was going to take me and Su to NaiNai’s house, but I don’t want to go. Can I stay with you?”
“You’d—you’d rather stay with me than with your grandmother?”
“Mhm!” Lin exclaimed, crawling up into his lap again. When had she left his lap in the first place? “Mama said we would have to take the train there for her to drop us off, and I don’t like the train. Too many people.”
To be honest, Sokka loved the idea of spending the weekend with Lin, but he wouldn’t want to if Toph didn’t. And she hadn’t even approached him about it, which kind of stung, but he didn’t take it too personally.
He was sure that she’d be fine with it either way, but he still said to Lin, “Clear it with Mama and we have a deal.”
Lin’s face brightened before she hugged him and ran off in pursuit of her mother, giving him more time to be alone and think.
He didn’t want to think; he’d done enough thinking that day.
Quickly, he stood up to find something comfortable to wear and strip himself of his work clothes. Toph wasn’t in her room, but Suyin sure was—laying in her crib with her soft snores sounding out. Sokka smiled fondly as he grabbed his clothes out of his bag and slipped into the bathroom to change.
It didn’t take him too long, but when he returned to the sitting room, he found Toph bringing the large bag of takeout to the couch, two beers in her possession.
“The girls are asleep and I think I deserve this after the day I’ve had,” she told him with a groan as she popped the glass bottle open with ease and took a swig of the drink. Then, she handed one over to him before pulling a container of food out and chowing down.
Sokka swallowed, watching her every move and becoming mesmerized, and as much as he tried to stop himself from practically ogling, he couldn’t help it. Still, he cleared his throat and said, “Right, uh, before you get into that, Lin told me about you taking her down to Gaoling.”
“Mm, yeah,” she said with her mouth full, then smirked at him cunningly. “I was going to ask you about keeping an eye on her for a few days because I’ve got this huge stakeout coming up, but I forgot you were employed for a second there.”
“Gee, thanks, T.”
She howled in laughter, then sobered. “I just didn’t want to bother you. You seem busy enough as it is and I wasn’t about to dump my kids on you while I paraded around the city for two nights straight.”
Nonplussed, Sokka shook his head. “Bother me? You think—you think you and the girls bother me?”
“I mean—I know we don’t, but I can handle things. I don’t need you to do these things for me when I can find a solution to them, especially when you’ve got stuff to do.”
“No. No, I want to be here, I want to help, and I know you don’t need it, but I want to. I love—I love Lin and Su and I would do anything for them. You don’t even have to say the word because I’m already there… the same goes for you. You know that.”
Sokka watched her face transform, her jaw bouncing a bit—the way she did when she was trying to not cry in front of him—and she let out a huff. “You didn’t have to say all that—I would’ve said yes to you babysitting, regardless.”
The way her cheeks were tinted with just a bit of red made his heart soar and he finally decided to allow the warm feeling in his chest to settle where it desired.
She was his best friend.
And he was in love.