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In Your Eyes (and it all makes sense)
The universe, Sarah Reese thought as she stood in line for food in the hospital’s cafeteria, was laughing at her. It had to be. Otherwise, her mother wouldn’t be sitting in the same cafeteria talking to Sarah’s soulmate. Along with Cornelius and Claire Rhodes of Dolan Rhodes, that also happened to be Connor’s father and sister. Her mother caught her eye, stared at her for a heartbeat, and then waved her over.
Scratch that. The universe had to be paying her back for something she did in another life. She thought with a grimace, hesitating before she made her way over to the table. Her garden salad and orange juice were in her hands. But she forced her mouth into a tight smile as she approached the table. Inclining her head, she addressed her soulmate first, “Dr. Rhodes.”
Then she looked at the woman who had given birth to her. Addressing the woman less warmly than she had the man beside her, “Mother... I didn’t know you were in Chicago.”
“Mr. Rhodes is trying to open a Dolan Rhodes department store in New York and you'd know if you had answered the phone last weekend.” Her mother informed her with a mirror of the tight smile she wore. Her voice was singing in that way that grated on Sarah’s nerves. Her smile was probably just as fake as Sarah’s. Then she turned to the older man, “This is my daughter. Sarah,”
Sarah watched as the name registered with Connor’s father. Shifting in his seat, Cornelius Rhodes’ eyes darted between his son and her. Then he addressed her. “I’m assuming your last name is Reese as well?”
She nodded as Connor shuffled a little so he was slightly in front of her. He seemed to be acting as a human shield from his father. Once again coming to Sarah’s rescue like he had been doing all day.
Sarah bobbed her head up and down. What was the point of hiding it? Of course, Connor’s family would recognize her name. It was a part of his soul mark. Not that Sarah had been looking, but she just happened to see it when he changed his scrub shirt last week.
“I feel like I’m missing something here. Does that matter? That her last name is Reese?” Andrea Reese asked, now looking from her daughter to her client.
“It doesn’t,” Connor intercepted quickly before his father could get a word out. “Look, we were talking about Russell-”
“And now we’re talking about your soulmate,” Connor’s father said, almost cheerfully. It unnerved Sarah. Then the older man turned to Andrea Reese and explained, “It seems our kids are soulmates if your daughter has his words. But it seems my son didn’t care enough to introduce me or his sister.”
“Dad,” Claire started, sounding appalled as Connor flinched back. She felt it because his broad shoulder knocked into hers before he caught himself. But that wasn’t right. Her soulmate wasn’t trying to hide her. She hadn’t felt that. Instead, Connor Rhodes, pulling her into every case he could, tried to get to know and build a relationship with her. It was actually her who was pulling away from him.
Sarah watched her mother’s eyes nearly identical to hers zero in on her right wrist. Even though she couldn’t see it through the sleeves of Sarah’s lab coat.
“Oh,” Andrea Reese said in a bored tone as she rolled her eyes, “At least the move was good for something then. Then just wasting four years in Chicago. Not that soulmates are the sure thing everyone makes it out to be.”
Sarah felt herself stiffen at the words. It was an apparent dig at Kelly, her, and Connor. But she wouldn’t take the bait because it wouldn’t help to go off on her. Not here where she could potentially lose her spot at Med. No matter how much she wanted to defend her brother. The one person that had shown up for her when he had no obligation to. And continued to show up for her, despite their parents no longer being married.
Or her soulmate for that matter. Sarah had found, to her shock, that she wanted to defend him. No matter how many times she tried to push him away, afraid of being hurt, he simply moved slowly, never pushing, yet continuously breaking down her walls, pulling her closer with each one.
As for defending herself, well the curly-haired young woman had already decided a long time ago, that was a lost cause. It was no use. It was better to bite her tongue.
So Sarah shot Andrea a sarcastic smirk, “You know what Mother, I’m not doing this with you. You’ve proven that water is thicker than blood time after time. So I’m done. Let’s do this again in another four years. Because that’s how long it’s been since we’ve last seen each other right? Or better yet, since I’m such a disappointment, why don’t we never see each other again? How about that?”
Then she spun on her heel, and left her mother, Connor, and Connor’s family there, with their mouths slightly agape. But Sarah didn’t glance back; she had given her mother enough chances in the past.
It only took her soulmate ten minutes to find her hiding spot on the roof. Sarah said nothing as he took a seat beside her in the tucked-away alcove. She stabbed at her last piece of lettuce harder than probably necessary.
“I’m sorry,” Connor said quietly as she finished chewing the bite. Sighing Sarah set aside her trash, tilting her head back some to look up at him. “What are you apologizing for?”
“For my dad outing us as soulmates.” He started. But Sarah shook her head, cutting her soulmate off, “I should be making one to you. Because of how I acted down there. I should’ve walked away when my mother waved me over. I knew nothing good was going to come out of it.”
Sarah fell silent for a moment. Then she asked, “Shouldn’t you be getting ready for surgery?”
“We’re waiting on some surgical theatre images,” at Sarah’s look of confusion, he shrugged and clarified, “Halstead put me on to it. Some kind of three-dimensional images.”
“Oh SNAP. Northwestern has one. I’m not even planning on being a surgical resident. But even I can admit it’s really amazing, revolutionary even.” Connor cracked a smile at the excited tone his soulmate took on in her voice. And as much as he hated to end it, his curiosity had gotten the better of him.
“So can I ask, what the ‘wasting four years in Chicago’ comment was about? Does your mom not approve of you being a doctor?”
Immediately Sarah’s gleeful smile morphed into one of rue. “Caught that, did you? No, it was more about being in Chicago in general. She hates that I’m still in contact with my brother.”
“Why would that bother her?”
“Because technically he’s my step-brother or he was. I’m not really sure what he is now that they’re no longer married. But it doesn’t matter to me or him. I still call him my brother and treat him like he is because he is the one person who’s shown up for me since I was ten and he didn’t have to and still continues to show up for me. Even when our parents announced their divorce, he still showed up to my high school graduation. When my mother couldn’t, I should mention.”
She paused wondering if she had shared too much. But then Connor knocked her shoulder gently with his. So the curly-haired woman continued. “When I graduated from NYU, another thing he showed up for when my mom didn’t, he convinced me to come back here for medical school, and here we are four years later. ‘Wasting my time in Chicago.’ ”
Connor looked like he wanted to say something, but his pager beeped before he could get the words out.
“Looks like your images are ready. Go,” she said when he hesitated, “I’m fine. Besides, your friend needs you more than I do right now.”
Her soulmate nodded once at her reassurance. Then reaching out to squeeze her shoulder, he propelled himself to stand up. Then he was gone. Sarah sat there a little while longer, gathering herself before she made her way back down to the ED.
After leaving Maggie to deal with a patient that needed an I.V, and setting a kid’s broken arm back then leaving him with an ortho resident, the charge nurse found her again.
“Goodwin wants to see you in her office,” Maggie said in a soft tone. A look in her eye that Sarah knew didn’t bode well for her. Still, she questioned the other woman, “It’s not good is it?”
Maggie shrugged, “I don’t know what it’s about. But Goodwin rarely calls anyone into her office with good news.”
Shit. Shit. What had she done? Is this because she still couldn’t properly stick a needle? Chicago Med was the top hospital in Chicago and she was at the top of her class. But what good was that when multiple doctors and nurses had to help her with such a simple procedure?
Sarah hadn’t been performing up to Med’s standards and she knew it. She sighed, shoulders dropping. “Yeah, okay. Thanks, Maggie.”
It turned out, Sarah had only been half right. She was losing her spot but not because she wasn’t performing up to the hospital’s standards.
“Ms. Reese. Come in,” Mrs. Goodwin was seated at her desk when Sarah knocked on the door. But she wasn’t alone. Connor was sitting in one of the two seats in front of the desk. When their eyes met, she could see her confusion mirrored back in his blue eyes. She took a step into the office, closing the door behind her.
“Please sit,” Goodwin said, gesturing to the seat next to the trauma surgeon when Sarah remained rooted to her spot. Hesitantly, she moved forward then the back of her knees was hitting the fabric as she sank into the seat beside her soulmate.
Mrs. Goodwin sighed, linking her fingers together. “Now before I start. I want you to know that this isn’t coming from me. Essentially it’s just my job to be the messenger. But Ms. Reese, I’m afraid we have to revoke your spot here at Med.”
Sarah had been expecting this. But even so, hearing the words out loud made her stomach drop. She nodded, her eyes downcast. Accepting it.
“Wait, what?” Connor questioned looking at his soulmate, who was still looking at her hands, then he faced the head of the hospital. “Then why I’m here?”
The older woman sighed once more. “Are you or are you and Ms. Reese not soulmates?”
Sarah picked up her head to stare at the head of the hospital. She swallowed tightly, not liking where this was headed. “We are. But what does that have to do with anything? We’re not together like that.”
The older woman sighed as she peeled off her glasses. “Med has a strict policy about residents and above, dating medical students. And that includes soulmates. That’s why we ask everyone to disclose their status regarding soulmates.”
“But we’re not even in a romantic relationship…” Sarah started to protest again. Meanwhile, Connor was shaking his head. “Mrs. Goodwin, with all due respect, this is complete bullshit.”
“Be that as it may, you didn’t disclose your soulmate status and it was brought to the attention of the board-”
“We didn’t know until the train derailment! You can’t predict when you’ll meet them!” Connor jumped in, saving Sarah from having to say anything, anger clear in his voice. “How the hell were we supposed to disclose it? Furthermore, what good would that have done? What incentive is there for us to tell you? There’s more incentive for us to hide it for fear of losing our jobs.”
“You’re not losing your job,” Sarah pointed out reluctantly when the head of the hospital remained silent. Sarah hated that she had to be the one to point it out to him. Because she wasn’t mad at him. It wasn’t his fault that the hospital valued him more as a trauma fellow than her as a medical student. Connor turned to look at her. His blue eyes were drawn together in confusion. Sarah sighed, “I am.”
Her soulmate whipped his head back to the older woman so fast, “Wait, so we’re soulmates but only one of us is getting punished here?”
“The board believes-”
“Who told the board?” Connor cut off their boss. His tone went from disbelieving to angry in the span it took to blink. “No one knew but us.”
“And our parents,” Sarah told him quietly, toying with her curls. Her soulmate faced her and she shrugged, dropping her eyes down so she wouldn’t have to see his face when she said, “I wouldn’t put it past my mom now that she knew. It would be another one of her tantrums because I’m in Chicago.”
“Yes, well Med is prepared to help you find another program.” Mrs. Goodwin addressed her once more. Sarah nodded, “Anywhere but Lakeshore please.”
She didn’t think she could handle walking into that hospital without Hailey there, especially given her history with that hospital. Goodwin nodded, making a note with a sigh. “I am truly sorry about this Ms. Reese,”
“If she’s removed from the program,” Connor spoke up in a calm and self-assured tone, “Then I’m walking out right behind her.”
“Connor,” Sarah’s eyes widened at his words. She wasn’t worth him forfeiting his job over. “It’s okay.”
Her soulmate turned and pinned her look that made his blue eyes look like steel. Sarah didn’t know it yet, but this would be the look he gave her when he wasn’t about to let something go. He shook his head, “No, it’s not.”
Then Connor turned back to face Sharon Goodwin. Challenging her. “If the board wants to call my bluff? Go ahead, because I can assure you, I’m not. And there are plenty of other hospitals that would take one look at my resume and love to hire me.”
The curly-haired young woman held her breath, waiting for a dismal. But instead, the head of the hospital smirked at them. “And that’s exactly what I told the board when they informed me of their decision.”
“How’d you know?” Sarah asked, looking at their boss. Sharon’s smirk turned into a soft smile as she shook her head, almost fondly.
“I didn’t,” Ms. Goodwin said simply. It was then Sarah noticed the black letters weaving themselves up and down the older woman’s ring finger. “But I’ve been married to my soulmate for the last thirty years and it’s been in my experience to bet on soulmates than against them.”