Chapter Text
It started when Cassie was six. Falling into step with her father as he navigated through the endless halls of the hospital, it rose first as a dull tingle at the nap of her neck, a weird buzz in her fingers. Every time she walked past a nurse or a doctor, she felt her body grow heavier and heavier, as if boulders rested on her shoulders. And when she glimpsed at patients in their rooms, either asleep or reading mindlessly, a churning sensation would twist in her belly. Nausea would sweep through her, flashes of piping hot flames dancing across her face. She would grip her father’s fingers tighter, nearly dragging him. But, the worst feeling of that fateful day was when the pair had finally found the room they were searching for.
Underneath cotton hospital sheets, with sunken cheeks and hallowed eyes, her mother’s ragged breath shifted ever so slightly. Cassie had let go of her father and climbed haphazardly onto her mother’s bed. No one, not even herself, had said a word as she did. Her mother simply opened her arms and allowed her little girl to burrow herself into the crevice of her shoulder.
Cassie had tried then not to think about the dull beeping of the heart monitor that seemed to drag in between each beep. She tried not to think about her mother’s cold hands pressing against her shoulder blades, and she tried not to think about the echoing silence that filled the room as her father took his seat next to the bed.
However much she tried, though, she could not ignore the sharp, almost unbearable dagger that shoved its way in between her jugular and her rib cage. Her tiny fists gripped the rough blankets and her lungs gasped for breath against her mother’s chest.
“It--It hurts,” she whimpered. Cassie squeezed her eyes shut and held on just a little bit tighter. The cool, calming hand of her mom labored its way to the baby hairs at the end of her scalp, gently spinning the fine threads.
“Take a breath, little one. It will pass,” her mother whispered. Her dad huffed and hid his eyes beneath his palm.
“It will not, Meleth nîn, ” he mumbled. Cassie never understood what the funny-sounding words meant, but her parents always said them. Sometimes whispered, sometimes yelled when the other couldn’t hear. It was sacred to them, she thought.
“We can’t,” her father began. “- I can’t do this without you.” His voice broke and his green eyes peaked over the barricade of his fingers. Red and threatened with tears, his eyes lulled over the visage of his wife. This too, Cassie wished to not think about.
Her mother, with great effort, reached out to her father, who grasped her hand with equal parts desperation and impatience. He folded her nimble fingers in between his own and pressed the back of her hand against his forehead.
“You will have to teach her. Show her…tell her,” her mother said. Cassie raised her head and slanted it upwards towards her mother's gaunt face.
“Tell me what?” She had asked. Her mom smiled and pressed a loving kiss to her forehead.
“You will soon know,” she replied quietly, her voice not above a whisper.
Suddenly, her mother’s eyes seemed to cast off, hands stilling on top of Cassie’s head. Something arose deep within Cassie, something that she couldn’t understand. It was vile, repulsive, and tar-like. It devoured her gut and made her hands tremble, wreaking havoc on her pulse.
“Momma?” She whimpered. Her father’s eyes snapped forward, lurching from his seat.
The ink creature wound its way behind Cassie’s eyes and suffocated her breath and her thoughts. The heart monitor to her right let out a steady, decrepit beep. Her dad rushed from the room yelling for nurses and doctors alike. Cassie gripped harder onto her mother’s blankets and leaned deeper into her mother’s chest.
“Mom!” She cried, wailing and screaming. The demon only crawled deeper within her bones, cold and burning white-hot all at once. Her father raced back into the room, followed by a small army of nurses. Her father and a nurse tried to pry her dainty hands from her mother’s hold, but she resisted.
“Please! Don’t take her away from me!” She screeched, she pushed away from her father’s iron grip and held on even tighter.
“Cassiopeia! Let go!”
“No! You can’t take her away!” Her father ripped her small body away and hauled her outside of the room. More nurses poured in, but Cassie couldn’t see anything beyond the vignette clouding her vision. The black monster raged within her and she was swept away by her father’s arms.
“Shh! You’re okay, you’re okay,” her dad soothed. Collapsed onto the floor, the man took his daughter into his arms and shielded her. His chest trembled and shook, hands like steel cuffs around her wrists.
“You’re okay,” he repeated. His words were empty and deaf. “You’re okay.”
“She’s my mom,” Cassie sobbed, burrowing into her father. Tears ran rampant down her face and had she dared to open her eyes for more than a second, she would have found her father in a likeness.
It had only been years later that Cassie understood what the monster had been, that feeling that overcame her: It was death—It was her mother’s death.