Chapter Text
Jeonghan knows that their relationship is a lost cause.
He had met Seungcheol when they were both in high school. It didn't take long for them to become one of those popular cliche couples in teen movies.
He had naively thought that he would have his fairy tale ending. Seungcheol had promised him a dream life, that they would get married and have a nice family.
They soon had a son, who was a source of joy in the large house they shared. At least it was for Jeonghan, who didn't know that his partner's sudden marriage proposal was almost forced by his ‘in-laws’, who wanted their grandson to grow up with married parents.
However, the ceremony was never held.
Perhaps it was because he was blind with love that the younger hadn't noticed the signs and red flags that came from his partner. Seungcheol took everything Jeonghan was willing to give him, even more than that.
He used him as he pleased, and maybe Jeonghan understood that, but he played dumb because he loved him.
He really loved that ruthless being who only treated him as a mere whim.
He also pretended not to know when Seungcheol showed up drunk after midnight, smelling like someone else's cologne.
Like him, he likewise turned a deaf ear when he clearly called other people "Love" on a call.
He couldn't complain about anything from Seungcheol, because he was afraid of losing him, and he preferred to live like this.
Loving him and having him by his side, even if it hurts.
It lasted like this for ten long years, in that same routine that both he and Seungcheol were getting tired of.
The oldest because he considered his life with him boring, and Jeonghan because his fantasy was becoming more and more of a nightmare.
When he got a second positive pregnancy test, this time there wasn't the same joy as with Hansol, he didn't even want to tell his... partner about him, but he had no choice.
Seungkwan was greeted by him with a smile, but deep inside him, he couldn't help but cry.
It was in the same week of the birth of his second child that he dozed in bed next to both of his children. This without being aware of how the other occupant of the room silently packed their bags, without even giving them a glance as they left.
*******
Five years ago Jeonghan felt his world collapse when his ex-fiancé made it clear to him that they were over.
It was five years ago that he neglected himself enough to end up in the hospital.
But all that had already happened.
He stood his ground and went ahead with his two sons.
What did it matter if Seungcheol got bored with him and what they had? He did too.
Now the only thing that mattered to him were his children, Hansol and Seungkwan.
This does not mean that he got rid of the older man completely from his life. This was still the father of his children, whether he liked it or not.
He honestly did not understand the man's insistence on wanting to be part of their lives, after having practically abandoned them, but he had reintegrated into their daily lives.
At least in Seungkwan's, who was so young and didn't quite understand everything that had happened.
Hansol for his part had matured somewhat, and was aware of how much he suffered when his other father left. He refused to have any kind of contact with Seungcheol after that.
He no longer wanted him, nor did he need him in his life.
"I already told you no," he said with an annoyed voice into the phone, while he was preparing his kid's lunch for that day. "My children will not set foot in that house."
"They're his grandparents, Jeonghan!" Seungcheol refused from the other side of the line. "They deserve to see them from time to time, just like yours."
"At least I didn't abandon my family," he claimed between clenched teeth, frowning even if the other couldn't see him, but he ended up sighing, "And I'm not talking about going to your parents, I mean to your new house, asshole."
There was a pause as his children got out to get their things, ready to head to the car.
"I'm almost done, wait for me in the garage" he told them with a smile "Kwannie, take your brother's hand, okay?"
"Okay!" The five-year-old mimicked, taking the eldest's hand, who had the headphones almost glued to his ears "Come on, come on, Sol hyung!"
Hansol allowed himself to be pulled on, with a neutral expression, but in his eyes all the affection he had for his little brother was harbored.
Jeonghan looked at them for a few seconds, before returning to his call.
"That was them? Where are you guys going?” His ex asked gossipy.
He let out a sigh, massaging his brow.
"To school, and Seungkwan to daycare" He replied, thinking carefully about what he was going to say "And don't try to change the subject, Choi. You will not take my children with you, period."
“It's only for a few days!” Seungcheol insisted, and he could almost, almost, visualize his pout and see him stomping his foot.
He had always been immature.
"I already told you no" He finished, checking the watch on his wrist "Now I have to go, so if you don't have anything important to say, I'll take my leave."
He did not expect a response, he simply hung up the call and headed to the car, ready to take his children to their respective schools and then head straight to work.
*******
His afternoon had been completely quiet, that is, until his boss called him out of the blue, asking him to report for a case in a neighboring town that same night.
Being one of the most sought-after lawyers in his firm had its drawbacks.
"Quick, Seungkwannie, I need you to look for the toys you want to take" He told his son, while he packed his suitcase to stay a couple of days at the grandparents' house "Hansol! You're ready?"
"Yes!", his eldest son answered from his room, "The doorbell rings!"
"Go see who it is, please!", he told him, as he finished arranging Seungkwan's clothes, "Is everything ready?"
"Yes, everything is ready, dad" The little boy replied, and he couldn't help but laugh when he noticed that he was willing to carry another bag exclusively for his toys "What? Why are you laughing?"
He shook his head, simply grabbing both bags to carry to the car.
On his way down the hall he bumped into Hansol, who had a frown on his face and slammed the door to his room as he entered.
"But what...?"
“Dad!” The other boy's joyous cry caught his attention, focusing on the man in his living room who was holding Seungkwan up with a smile.
He winced at the scene.
“What are you doing here, Seungcheol?” He asked, now understanding his eldest son's behavior, “It's not a good time"
"Why?" The elder asked, raising an eyebrow.
Before he could reply that it wasn't his business, Seungkwan answered for him.
"Dad has a meeting," the boy informed, kicking slightly, "So we're going to grandma's house."
He knew from Seungcheol's smile that he had better not say anything.
“Why don't you stay with me instead?” he asked, and Seungkwan's eyes widened, clearly excited by the idea.
"Can I go, dad? Can I stay with daddy Seungcheol?" The boy begged, getting down to reach him and hug his legs "Pretty please?"
A glance at the younger's excited eyes made him falter.
Not that he doubted that Seungcheol would take good care of Seungkwan, he knows that he is capable of doing so. It's just that he doesn't want the elder to get close to his family again, but there is very little he can do about it.
In itself, the elder did not do anything "wrong", nothing else than breaking his heart, but that is not a reason to ask for a restraining order.
Seungcheol just got bored with them, and he was at peace with it, but he didn't want his kids to get attached to him and end up disappointed when the inevitable happened.
For Seungcheol to become completely bored with them as well.
"Okay," he finished, accepting, sighing at the two exclamations of joy from the others. "But you better take good care of him, Choi."
"Yes, yes, yes, who wouldn't take care of this cutie?" Inquired, the oldest, squeezing the little one's cheeks, and while that, Hansol came out with his backpack ready in hand "And you, Hansollie? Do you want to go with us to my house too?"
"I'll wait for you in the car to go to grandma's, dad," the teenager said, looking directly at Jeonghan and completely ignoring Seungcheol. "Excuse me."
He waited until Hansol left the house to turn around and give Seungkwan's things to his ex-partner.
"I think you have your answer."
*******
Seungkwan looked curiously at the front of his other dad's house.
He never imagined that his father Seungcheol had a house. He just thought he got to his, and never thought he had one too.
"It's pretty, isn't it, Seungkwannie?" Enquired the eldest, taking him by the hand to lead him inside "You'll have your own room, what do you think?"
“Yes!” He replied enthusiastically “Hey, daddy, why don't you live with us? Our house has space."
He heard a sigh, but when he looked back at his dad he just smiled.
“Not for me, Seungkwan."
He didn't ask any more.
He played for a few hours with his dad, and got acquainted with his new room.
It was bigger than the one he had at home with his dad Jeonghan and Hansollie hyung, but not as nice because he didn't have his stuff.
"What do you want for dinner, champ?" The eldest asked him, leaning on the door frame. "We can order a pizza."
“Pizza!” he exclaimed with a smile, arranging his toys on the shelves.
Seungcheol laughed, and went back to the living room.
It wasn't that long before he heard footsteps in the hallway, so he looked up, surprised to see a young stranger pass in front of his door.
Since his presence was not noticed, he cautiously approached the figure, who was rubbing his eyes as he went to what seemed to be the bathroom.
He followed, intrigued.
Who was this boy?
He looked young, but not as young as his brother.
It wasn't until he was directly behind him that he brought himself to lightly touch the other's arm to get his attention, accidentally startling the boy.
"Are you my dad's friend?" He asked innocently, smiling at the eldest, who seemed surprised to see him. "What's your name? I am Seungkwan."
The stranger was still looking at him with wide eyes, but he quickly snapped out of his astonishment to smile slightly at him.
"It's nice to meet you, Seungkwan, my name is Jihoon..."
Jihoon, what a nice name.
“Do you want to play with me?” He asked out of nowhere, taking his hand to lead him to his room. “Dad's busy ordering pizza, so I'm alone."
He didn't notice, but he received a more genuine smile from the older man.
*******
It turns out that Jihoon was not a friend of his father.
That was explained to him by his own father at dinner, after having found the two playing with his stuffed animals.
“Jihoon is my…partner, Seungkwannie."
That he understood. His dad Jeonghan had explained to him about that, and how he and his dad Seungcheol used to be together, but not anymore. He still didn't quite understand why the latter, but at least he already knows that his father Seungcheol is not always alone.
He now had Jihoon.
This one suited him very well. He was playing with him and they had a lot of fun today. He even sang to him before going to sleep, which he felt like he was being hugged in a warm blanket.
He enjoyed those two days at his dad's house, mostly because he made a new friend.
"Dad's house is very nice" he innocently told his father when he returned home on Monday afternoon "I had a lot of fun there, especially with Jihoon hyung."
His dad Jeonghan had frowned at the comment.
"Jihoon hyung?" Enquired the eldest, raising an eyebrow "Who is that, honey?"
"Oh! He's daddy's partner" He explained with a big smile, not realizing how sour his father's gaze turned "Jihoonie hyung lives with daddy now. He is very cute and funny! He sings beautifully, and..."
He stopped talking when he noticed that his dad was no longer there.
*******
Jeonghan kept a frown on his face as he worked from his computer at his home office.
He was acting irrationally, he told himself.
Little should he care about what Seungcheol did with his life, much less who he shared it with.
This 'Jihoon' was surely another one of his whims, he thought cruelly, but after thinking better of it he scolded himself.
He hoped that Seungcheol had changed, and that he didn't make someone else go through what he did to him.
But still, this stranger had been close to his son, and he didn't know him well enough to be comfortable with the idea that he was there.
He sighed, trying to focus on his work instead of his ex's new boyfriend.
*******
As Seungkwan insisted on wanting to spend time at his father's house from that day on, he had reached an agreement with the elder; Seungkwan would stay with him on weekends, but Seungcheol had to commit to really taking care of him.
And that's how they made the little boy happy.
Jeonghan didn't even have to look at Seungcheol's face for more than five minutes when he picked up his son to take him away or bring him back.
Everyone was happy with that arrangement.
Well, everyone except Hansol.
"I don't understand why you let him take Kwannie away," the younger muttered, sitting on the couch while he pretended to watch a movie. "What can you expect from that man?"
"He's your father Hansol" He scolded reluctantly with a sigh "And although he's not the best person in the world, Seungkwannie is very excited to spend time with him. You understand, don't you?"
He bit his lip lightly when Hansol frowned at him.
Seungcheol left them when his oldest child was ten. At that age he was already able to understand certain things, such as what a breakup is and his father leaving them. Even years ago the one he considered as the person he admired as a child treated him more and more coldly.
Hansol cried a lot the day he went to sit waiting for his dad at the entrance of the house and Jeonghan had to explain to him that he wasn't coming back.
Which was not entirely true, because when Seungkwan turned three he reappeared in their lives, wanting to 'make up for lost time' but it was too late now, at least on his and Hansol's part.
"Not that I have to like it," the young man huffed, to which he let out a light laugh, approaching to ruffle his hair lovingly.
"I know, I know. But make the effort, okay?” He asked, sighing, “Your dad may have been a jerk to you and me, but so far he hasn't been to Seungkwannie. And I hope it stays that way."
Resignedly, his eldest son nodded, so he leaned down to leave a resounding kiss on his forehead, laughing at his complaints.
They stayed in silence for a few minutes, looking disinterestedly at the movie, with the younger's head in his lap while he ruffled his hair.
"And... who is Jihoon?" Hansol asked out of nowhere, to which he looked down at him. "Seungkwan doesn't stop talking about that name. Do you know them?"
He let out another sigh, only this is more tired than the others.
"I only know that he is your father's boyfriend," he replied, shrugging his shoulders. "I've never seen him, and I hope I don't."
"Hmm…”
They continued to watch the movie, inadvertently falling asleep in that position.
*******
"So you're a teacher?" Asked the boy in astonishment, while accidentally and without realizing it pushing the tower of little blocks that had cost him so much to put together. "Like the ones from kindergarten and school?"
"Something like that" Jihoon replied, smiling at the little boy "Only that I teach music."
Seungkwan gasped in surprise.
"Hansollie hyung likes music too" He commented out of the blue, pouting curiously "You guys would get along, if only he came here."
This last was said with a groan, which surprised him.
“And why doesn't he come here?” he asked, genuinely interested.
He didn't know the eldest son of his partner, he had never seen him, and he didn't talk much about him or his other family either.
He didn't want to intrude, but he was curious about the other people that he was sure were still important in the older man's life.
Seungkwan was a sweetheart, and even though he was young, he was good company.
"Hansol hyung doesn't like daddy" The boy replied simply, looking around the room "Whenever he sees him he frowns, and doesn't even speak to him or… OH NO, MY TOWER!"
Apparently that was the only thing he was going to get, for now he had to keep Sungkwan from crying over his crashed construction.
"Hey, we can put it back together," he assured, helping the boy to sit next to him so that together they could put the tower back on its feet.
"But it won't be as pretty as before," the younger complained, crossing his arms and he noticed how little tears accumulated in his eyes.
He thought for a moment, gently stroking his hair.
"It's true, it won't be like before," he accepted, smiling as he passed his thumb over the boy's cheeks to dry the tears that were slipping down them. "But now you have the chance to make it even better. Starting over..."
Apparently that was enough for the boy to stop crying, now giving a determined expression.
"Then we'll make the tower much more beautiful than before" The boy declared, smiling broadly "Come on, Jihoon hyung, we have to make it even taller!"
He smiled at the little boy's excitement, and they both kept playing, or well, that is until Seungcheol came running into the room, apparently getting ready in a hurry.
"Seungkwan, go get your things," he ordered, trying and failing to put on his tie correctly. "I'll take you home."
"What?! Why?!” The boy demanded, frowning and crossing his arms again. “I'm supposed to stay until the day after tomorrow!"
Seungcheol sighed, apparently not too happy about the sudden change in plans either.
“Cheol, what's wrong?” He asked him too.
"Something happened at work," the older man replied, rolling his eyes, "I have to go now. So come on, Seungkwan, you have to go home."
"No!", exclaimed the boy, suddenly hugging Jihoon's torso, "I want to stay with Hyung!"
He smiled slightly at the boy and turned to his boyfriend.
"I can take care of him for a few hours if you agree," he proposed.
"Are you sure?" Seungcheol asked, clearly hesitating. "Isn't that too much trouble, Jihoonie?"
"Not at all, Seungkwan is an angel" He assured, hugging the boy too "Isn't that right, Seungkwannie?"
"YEAH!"
The older man thought about it for a bit, but he ended up nodding.
"Okay," he agreed, to which the boy was thrilled, "But you behave well."
The five-year-old hugged his father tightly before running off to get more blocks for the new tower.
"Are you sure you can handle him?", his boyfriend asked, and as he noticed that he was still struggling with his tie, Jihoon took pity on him and got up to help him, "I don't want to leave you in charge of who I should take care of."
"Hey, it's okay," he assured him this time, smiling at him and standing on his tiptoes to kiss Seungcheol softly on the lips. "Now go to work relaxed, I'll take care of it."
"Thank you Jihoonie."
"I love you," he said before the older man walked out the door.
He just smiled at him with a nod.
And when he was no longer in sight, Jihoon let his smile fade.
He loved Seungcheol, he really did. But he couldn't help but feel hurt every time he tried to prove it to the elder.
Seungcheol only paid attention to him when he needed him or he was in a good mood.
He did not feel truly loved.
At first he hadn't taken that feeling so seriously, but right now he just felt that Seungcheol was getting... bored of him.
He changed his expression to a more pleasant one when he heard small footsteps coming from the hallway.
"Ready to rebuild our tower, Seungkwan?"
*******
"Hansol, don't you remember if I put Seungkwan's pajamas in the suitcase?" He asked his eldest son, who just shrugged. "I don't remember, and I see that I left two folded on the bed, but I don't know if it was because I put them there a while ago or if I left them there by accident."
Hansol seemed to think about it for a few moments, and he ended up sighing.
"I don't like the idea at all, but why don't you mark Seungcheol and ask him?" Proposed the younger, going to his room. "Maybe that way he'll finally be useful for something"
He rolled his eyes at his son's behavior, but didn't blame him.
He also behaved like this when he had to maintain the minimum interaction with his former partner.
He called Seungcheol's phone but he didn't answer, so he began to worry, but then he decided to call the landline at the other's home.
About three rings passed before they finally picked up, only it wasn't the voice he expected.
"Yes, hello?" A sweet voice asked from the other end of the line. "Hello?"
He snapped out of his reverie to clear his throat.
"Excuse me, I think I have the wrong number" He apologized, ready to hang up "Good night..."
"Wait!" Interrupted the other voice. "Are you trying to reach Seungcheol? This is his number."
He frowned slightly at that.
Ah, this sure was Seungcheol's new boyfriend.
"You must be Jihoon" He commented listlessly "I'm Jeonghan, Seungkwan's father."
"Oh! Mr. Yoon, yes, I'm Jihoon" The other clarified, to which he rolled his eyes "It's a pleasure to finally talk to you, I..."
"Just pass me Seungcheol, please," he interrupted with a sigh, massaging his forehead, "I need to ask him something."
There was a slight pause.
"Seungcheol... he's not here," the other explained hesitantly, to which he got alarmed. "They called him from work about an hour ago."
At the news he was slightly startled.
“And Seungkwan?” He asked with concern, “Where is he?
"Oh, don't worry, he's here with me." Said this 'Jihoon' with calmness. "If you want, I'll pass the phone to him and..."
"I'm going there" He interrupted him again, cutting off the call to quickly look for his keys "Hansol, I'm going out! I'll be right back!"
He got into his car and went straight to the address that his former partner had told give when they made the agreement.
Agreement that he was fully prepared to break.
How could that idiot think of leaving his son alone like that?
He should have notified him to go for it, not leave Seungkwan to just anyone.
In less than twenty minutes he was already in front of the house. He got out of his car and knocked loudly on the door, totally impatient.
When it was opened, his eyes caught those of a pale young man, who looked back at him with a smile.
"You must be Jeonghan, I'm..."
"I don't care," he declared, allowing himself to enter the house, knowing the other was right behind him. "Seungkwan, where are you?!"
"Dad?" A little brown head called from the couch, smiling broadly, "Dad! Are you coming to play with me and Hoonie too?"
He frowned at the nickname, and just took his son's hand to lead him outside.
"No, Seungkwan, we're going home."
"What?! NO!" The boy tried to let go, but he didn't allow it, he just kept walking "I want to stay here with Jihoon hyung!"
"Don't throw a tantrum," he scolded, throwing him a warning look. "Come on, obey."
Seungkwan kept resisting, which frustrated him.
"Mr Yoon..."
"You stay out of this!" He yelled at the other, who clearly didn't expect that reaction from him "And tell your boyfriend that Seungkwan won't come back here anymore."
Regardless of the boy's cries, he took him to the car, making sure he was well seated in his seat to get out of there once and for all, leaving a boy at the entrance, clearly still shocked by the situation.
He tried to calm down as he drove, but his son's whines made it difficult for him.
"Seungkwan, enough" He asked, sighing "I wasn't serious about that you wouldn't go back there, okay? It was just the heat of the moment"
"NO!", the boy yelled at him, to which he was surprised, "I didn't want to leave, I was having fun! And you treated Jihoon hyung badly!" The younger scolded him, and in the rearview mirror he saw him with a frown and tears running down his cheeks "I don't love you anymore!"
He pretended that claim didn't hurt, concentrating on driving and nothing else.
Perhaps he had exaggerated a bit. He shouldn't have acted so rough with Seungkwan like that, he got carried away by his anger and made his son cry.
He would apologize to him once they got home.
*******
"And this is the last time you leave my son with a complete stranger, Choi Seungcheol," he warned on the phone the next morning.
“Jihoon is not a stranger, Jeonghan!"
"He is for me!" He reiterated, totally frustrated "Seungkwan won't come back for now, he will only do it when I can really trust that you won't leave him alone again."
"But he wasn't alone!"
“We'll talk later, bye!” He finished, cutting off and groaning.
He glanced at the closed door of his son's room.
He really could just go and open it with no problem, but Seungkwan had made it clear that he didn't want to see him.
Jeonghan had already apologized for yelling at him the night before, but the little boy kept insisting that that was not the reason for him being upset.
It was rather the way he had treated his ‘dear Jihoonie hyung'.
What an empathic child he raised, huh?.
“Hasn't he forgiven you yet?” He jumped slightly at the question, turning to see Hansol, who was leaning next to him on the wall, “I'm sure he'll get over it soon, you know his anger doesn't last long."
He nodded, but something inside him told him this was not the case.
Perhaps four days passed in which his youngest son did not dare to speak to him, which made him sad.
So he decided to let his pride break at dinner, and go fulfill his son's whim.
"I'm sorry for treating Jihoon like that, okay?" He apologized to Seungkwan, who finally turned to see him "I didn't think it was that important to you..."
Seungkwan sighed, as if he led a life of only problems, which was funny because he was only five and had always had a good life.
"You treated him very badly," the boy said with a sad pout, "And you yelled at him. Jihoonie hyung doesn't like yelling, it makes him cry."
At such a comment, he frowned at him.
“How do you know that?” He dared to ask, “Did he tell you?
But Seungkwan shook his head.
"One night daddy Seungcheol yelled at him, and he ran away while he cried" The boy commented innocently, tilting his head "I was going to the bathroom, but I heard them from the living room."
Oh...
Well, it seems that the relationship was not as smooth as he first thought.
"I see..." he really didn't know what to say "You like that boy, don't you?"
"Jihoonie hyung is very good to me" His son replied, forming a smile, the first since he went to pick him up that night "He always plays with me when I ask him, and he is also very caring... I like spending time with him, Dad, I love him very much."
He felt something stir inside him.
It wasn't a nice feeling, that his son spoke like that about a person he hadn't known for a long time. That even for defending him in a certain way he did not speak to him, his own father...
He didn't like that Jihoon at all.
He had won Seungkwan's affection very quickly, and was the current partner of his ex with whom he lasted more than ten years...
Yes, Jihoon wasn't really one of his favorite people, he had literally only seen him once, but even so, he felt a certain pity for him.
He didn't want to see him again, but he didn't want to take away the apparent happiness he gave his son either.
He sighed, taking the phone, ready to make a call.
"Jeonghan?"
"Seungcheol, give me Jihoon's number, please."