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Donnie couldn’t sleep. Not that it was unusual for him. More nights than not, he spent his nights in his lab, developing whatever improvements or new technologies came to mind. But after the Krang incident, innovation wasn’t the only reason he couldn’t sleep.
He could still recall with perfect clarity the fight against the eldest Krang, the long moment spent in free fall as he and Mikey were thrown off the Technodrome, watching from afar as Leo sacrificed himself to send the Krang back to the prison dimension-
Donnie had felt a void he hadn’t expected as his older twin was trapped in another dimension. He’d found tears trailing down his face, but he was too empty inside to be surprised. He knew Leo had made the only call he’d thought he could, but… it didn’t lessen the hurt any.
So yes, Donnie couldn’t sleep, and yes, it was because he couldn’t stop thinking about the Krang, but that wasn’t what was important right now. What was important was that Leo was not in the medbay recovering like he was supposed to be. Not that it really surprised Donnie. For all Leo’s duties as team medic, he was a terrible patient.
So, with a sigh, Donnie turned away from the medbay doors and headed to the training hall in search of his delinquent brother.
He heard Leo before he saw him, recognizing the familiar noise of his brother’s blades slashing through the air and thudding into the solid wood of a training dummy. As the team’s backup medic, and the only one with any common sense, Donnie knew that Leo should have absolutely not been doing that. But, he had to play it cool, or Leo would continue to do it just to spite him.
As Donnie entered the room, Leo turned to him, letting his katanas hang loose in his hands. His brother shot him a sheepish smile, acting like he hadn’t just been caught breaking bed rest for the third time.
“Hey, ‘Tello. What’s up?”
“You are, despite our repeated orders for you to stay in the medbay,” Donnie snapped, but there was no heat behind his words, only exhaustion. He ran a hand over his face. “Listen, ‘Nardo, and I realize you’re not going to listen, but you really shouldn’t be training in your condition.”
“I’m fine, Donnie. Sure, a little sore, but nothing I can’t handle-”
“Broken ribs, punctured lung, cracked shell, concussion, fractured tibia…” Donnie glanced at the readout on his gauntlet, but he didn’t really need to. Leo’s wounds were burned into his brain, cycling on repeat whenever he let his mind drift to them. “I can go on. Need I remind you that you almost died?”
“Everyone’s been doing that plenty,” Leo groused. “Really, I’m okay. You guys don’t have to worry.”
“Well, forgive me if I don’t just take your word for it.” Donnie’s digital readout beeped, but he didn’t need it. He could read his brother well enough to know he was hurting. “Why don’t you sit down for a minute, get your weight off that tibia?”
“I’m gonna have to pass on that.”
Donnie raised an eyebrow. “And what do you mean by that?”
Leo shrugged with practiced ease, but he couldn’t quite hide his wince. “I’m not done training yet.”
“Leon…”
Ignoring him, Leo turned back to the training dummy, splinters of wood flying off of it with each strike of his blades. Donnie sighed. He debated for a moment calling Splinter or Raph, but ultimately decided against it. They’d been beating themselves up enough for what had happened to Leo. Unfortunately, that left Donnie to handle this himself. Joy.
He waited until Leo pulled away from the dummy again, breathing hard with a sheen of sweat on his skin, before pulling out his bo staff and twirling it in one hand. Leo studied him for a moment, a smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth.
“You looking for a fight, ‘Tello?”
“Only if you’re in the mood for one, ‘Nardo.”
Leo chuckled. “Bring it on.”
Donnie let Leo lead the fight, opting to pass the time defensively and spend his energy analyzing his brother. From the sloppy form and gaps in his defenses alone, he knew Leo was exhausted and in pain. Not that it was surprising. Still, there was dogged determination in his brother’s attacks. He wasn’t going to back down, regardless of how bad of an idea that was.
But Donnie wasn’t going to back down either.
He let Leo continue to exhaust himself with slashes that were never going to connect before making his move, sweeping Leo’s legs out from under him. Leo fell to the mats with an oof, twisting himself as he fell so as not to land on his cracked shell. Donnie pointed the tip of his staff at Leo’s throat, and Leo groaned, one arm coming up to cover his eyes.
“Yeah, yeah, you won, you don’t have to gloat about it.”
Donnie released a huff of laughter, but rather than offering a hand down to his brother, he took a seat on the mats next to him. Leo propped himself up and stared at him, one eye ridge raised.
“You feeling alright, Donnie?”
If Donnie was being honest, the answer to that – and other questions in the same vein – was no. He was exhausted. Every time he let his mind wander he could feel the Technodrome’s slimy tentacles slipping into his shell and reaching into his brain-
A tremor ripped through him, and some of what he was thinking must have shown on his face. He felt Leo grab his shoulder, a firm and constant pressure, and tried to focus on that to pull him from his own mind.
“Donnie?” Leo asked, concern in his tone.
“I’m not. Feeling alright, that is.”
“Wanna talk about it?”
“No,” Donnie sighed. “But I probably should. We all probably should.” He shot a pointed glare at Leo with that last part, which, judging by Leo’s groan, did not go unnoticed.
Still, he didn’t take the hint, and Donnie sighed. It seemed he would have to set an example for his brother, as usual.
“I don’t feel comfortable in my own skin sometimes,” he admitted, with no small amount of reluctance. “All I can feel are the Krang’s tentacles slithering through my shell and in my mind.”
“I’m…” Leo paused, took a deep breath, and started again. “I’ve been sneaking out of the medbay to train because I want- need to be able to protect you guys when something like the Krang happens again.”
“I can’t sleep, not when any time I close my eyes I run through all the what ifs. Especially what if we never got you back from the prison dimension.” Donnie took a shuddering breath. “Until the portal closed, we could hear what the Krang said to you, we knew what it would do to you and I can’t help but imagine all the ways it could go wrong-”
Leo squeezed his shoulder, and Donnie placed a hand on top of his and returned the gesture.
“I can’t sleep either, but it’s worse than the usual insomnia,” Leo finally confessed. “I’ll have dreams of the prison dimension, of the Krang torturing me, but sometimes, they’re torturing you guys, and I can’t stop them, and-” He cut himself off. “I feel like everything’s my fault and maybe I deserved being stuck in the prison dimension.”
And there it was. Donnie glanced over at Leo to find that his older twin had ducked his head, staring at one of the holes in the mat that Mikey had patched over with rainbow duct tape. Though not one for physical affection himself, Donnie knew his brother desperately needed it. So, mindful of his brother’s injuries, he leaned into Leo, trying to offer his support. When Leo reciprocated, he knew he succeeded.
“Deserved or not, I’m glad you’re here, ‘Nardo,” Donnie murmured. “After all, you are my favorite brother.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Leo chuckled. “I’m just happy you finally admitted it.”
Donnie huffed with amusement. “Don’t tell Mikey or Raph.”
“I won’t. Scout's honor.” Leo paused. “But, I’m here for you too, ‘Tello. I know it’s been assumed, but you can always come to me if you need me, whether it be nightmares or sensory overload.”
“I know, Leo. And thank you.”
The two of them sat on the training mats in silence for a while, the only sound the ambient flow of water and air that was ever-present in the sewers. If Donnie strained, he could swear he heard Splinter snoring, but that wasn’t here nor there.
Beside him, he caught Leo trying and failing to stifle a yawn and glanced at his wrist gauntlet. Wow. It was far later – or really, earlier – than he’d thought. He stood, wavering slightly, before offering a hand down to Leo.
“I think it’s about time we both turn in.”
Leo stared up at Donnie for a moment, then nodded, taking his proffered hand and pulling himself up. He followed Donnie back to the medbay, but paused before entering, turning to face him.
“I… don’t really want to be alone right now,” Leo admitted, and Donnie knew his brother well enough to know that saying as much took a herculean effort on his part.
“Alright. Your room or mine?”
Leo seemed shocked Donnie had given in without so much as a fight. “Mine’s got a bigger mattress,” he finally decided.
Donnie nodded. “Lead the way.”
Arriving at Leo’s room, Donnie found it to be more of a mess than usual. Comics littered the floor, his weapons were haphazardly thrown in a corner, and his clothes were balled up at the foot of the bed. Though, considering the state of his own lab, he supposed he couldn’t judge.
Leo picked his way over to the mattress and began to situate himself. It took him a moment to get comfortable, then Donnie slipped in beside him. Leo shuffled himself so his head rested against Donnie’s shoulder, and Donnie loosely wrapped a hand around Leo’s wrist. He could feel Leo’s pulse, constant and steady, and some tight part of his chest loosened.
Leo yawned, closing his eyes. “Night, ‘Tello.”
“Goodnight, ‘Nardo.”
Donnie drifted off quicker than he had in a long time, lulled by his brother’s steady breathing. A dreamless sleep awaited him, awaited both of them, a welcome respite from the nightmares. The effects of the Krang attack were far-reaching, but he knew they would get through it.
After all, they always did.