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When Dan's girlfriends inevitably came over, there was always this jealous tension. And every time one of those bubble-heads came over, it became more clear that it wasn't just about Dan.
It was concerning, to say the least. Herbert West had never been truly in tune with his emotions. But now, he was sitting in his lab taking notes on everything those women did that made him jealous. And the weird thing?
It wasn't just the way Dan held them, it was far more. From the way they walked to the way they talked, it was always something.
At first, he thought he loved these girls; watching these attractive women tuck their long hair beyond their ears.
But it wasn't what he felt for Dan. No, it wasn't love it was...something different, something tried and tested that Herbert didn't think he'd ever be able to explain.
He wanted to ask Dan, but he didn't want him to get mad. He didn't want him to leave over something so trivial.
But as the experiments went on, he began putting body parts together, just to see if it could fix the missing piece inside of him.
But it never filled that hole. That whole that got deeper when he heard anybody talking about him. He didn't know what it was, but dammit, he was gonna find out before this disgusting feeling took over his life.
But they were all just parts. All just a bunch of different parts messily scraped together to try to explain what was wrong with him.
The worst part? Sometimes it got so bad that he couldn't even work when Dan and one of his girlfriends were there. He just felt so sick.
He guessed that was why Dan decided to leave when he asked him to bring them over less.
He understands that Dan wants a partner, but he can't keep doing this to Herbert.
The straw that broke the camel's back? He cried after seeing a photo of one of Dan's women because he couldn't deal with the envy he was experiencing.
He just wanted to look like that. To still look like a woman, even in shorts and a tee shirt.
And that realization was horrifying.
He refused to look back at those notes, and instead chose to ignore the feelings.
Because emotions and science never go well together.
But then when Dan told him that he was going to move out; And he couldn't let that happen.
So he let Dan take girls home again; no matter how much it hurt.
Then he got an idea, something to fix both of their problems.
So he presented his idea to Dan, and Dan agreed.
He began to find the perfect parts for the perfect woman. And those feelings came back, but now he was making Megan what his ideal woman would be. Or at least, what he thinks a woman should be.
Every part carefully handpicked with his very hands. It was beautiful. She was beautiful. This project made him feel more alive than he'd ever felt.
He wished Dan would talk about him like he talked about her. No matter how cold he was. He just wanted that.
He didn't really know what that was, but alas:
He wanted it.
As Herbert picked his parts, he looked over his notes. Picking out all the best parts of womanhood. The parts that he wanted.
And as he kept going, he became even prouder of his work. His creation. His statement to the world.
He wondered how much of this woman stuff was about sex. Because it seemed like that was what Dan always brought it down to. He hoped it wasn't all of it.
Cause he wanted to bemake the perfect woman for Dan.
So he got his parts and built her. Another Megan. Another Miss Halsey.
Sometimes he'd wondered what it would be like to be called miss.
And in the end, in the end she was beautiful. She was all Dan could ever want, ever need. And all Herbert wanted to be.
He ignored most thoughts during this project. He hadn't slept in a while, and the reagent was the only thing keeping him going. Even if she'd felt sick everytime she forced them back down.
And as he continued, the feelings got even worse. He got more jealous of that woman upstairs, Francesca, but he knew that he was making something that would be so much better than her bland attempts at femininity.
And the day came. The day Herbert showed Dan their work.
And he'd fallen to his knees in front of her.
…Then immediately rejected her.
For a real woman.
" But-but she's a woman, Dan! Isn't-Isn't this what you wanted? A woman?" He pleaded.
" You just did this to manipulate me!" Dan screamed. " AND I WANT SOMEBODY REAL! NOT JUST A MESS OF BROKEN PARTS. NOT A FUCKING CORPSE, HERBERT!"
" J-just because it's a mess doesn't mean it's not a woman, Dan!" Herbert yelled, trying to speak over the raging storm.
" Oh, and how would you know? A textbook? Watching me and my girlfriends? Oh yeah, and I can tell when you do that you little stalker–" Dan taunted, standing up above him in a way he knows that Herbert hates.
" That was for SCIENTIFIC PURPOSES!" Herbert screamed, failing to keep himself calm as tears started to pour down his cheeks.
" You're not a man, Herbert. You're a fucking coward who won't own up to his mistakes," Dan said, wrinkling his nose in disgust.
And Herbert smiled. Herbert smiled because that was how they felt. And as sobs tore through their throat they smiled because they knew it was the closest they'll ever be to feeling complete.
" Herbert, are you-are you crying?! God, maybe you should be the woman. You sure are doing a better job than the woman who just ripped her own heart out and is dead in our fucking basement!"
Yeah. Maybe she should be.
And as she gave in and let the emotions and thoughts flow freely through her mind, blood, heart, and soul. She finally figured it out.
" You're right, Daniel," She paused for a moment. " I'll fix this. I…I can figure this out. Then, then we can talk. We can have this argument. Just don't go, I'll destroy the evidence. Then we can figure this out," She looks up at him with pleading eyes.
And the tears streaming down her cheeks proved quite useful, as Dan agreed. " Fine, but twenty minutes and I'm leaving,"
Herbert smiled as Dan trekked up the stairs. Her work had almost been found out many times, so cleaning up was quite fast.
Then she picked up her notes on Dan's girlfriends. Just to explain.
She walked up the stairs and sat down across from him at the table, notes in hand.
So he opened up the notes and began reading, purposely skipping the parts entailing his feelings about Dan.
" From March 26th of this year, to now. I was studying your girlfriends in an attempt to explain what I was feeling about myself. It happened when I started to question why I hated them so much…It wasn't just me being jealous over your attention, Dan," She cautiously eyed him, face still hidden in her notes.
" What does this have to do with anything?" Dan muttered, inches away from slamming his fist on the table and calling it quits.
Herbert ignored Dan's comment and kept going. " I studied them, Dan. I needed to know what they were doing to me,"
" Oh? And what does you wanting to have sex with my girlfriends have to do with this?" Dan furrowed his brows.
" It wasn't about sex, Dan!" She yelled, her voice cracking as she looked Dan in the eyes for the first time after what had happened.
Dan raised an eyebrow, " Really? Cause that's sure what it sounds like,"
Herbert pursed her lips as she tried to ignore the tears in her eyes. " I wanted to be like them. I wanted to..." She trailed off.
" You're in love with me?" Dan flinched backward at the revelation. It's not that he didn't love Herbert, it's just–now? Definitely manipulation. " Herbert, sto–"
" BE QUIET!" Herbert screamed. tears running down her cheeks. " I wanted to be able to talk like them, walk," a sob escapes her throat, " walk like them. I–I always felt incomplete and I just. And when we built the bride I could build what I wanted and she could–she could be a woman. She could fill that hole," She wiped away some tears, took off her glasses, and did her best to ease the shaking in her voice, " I was trying to fix both of us, but I've only made it worse. I wanted it to be better. To fill that hole in both of us,"
" But she didn't," Herbert choked out.
Dan looked at him–no, her, with wide eyes. " Are you saying…you're a…"
" A transexual," She paused to let it sink in. " And when you were yelling at me about how I'll never be a man it clicked. After all my research and hours upon hours of studying, you explained it in seconds,"
" You're a transexual?" Dan asked with wide eyes.
" And I thought I could fix it. I thought the bride, Megan, would fix it. I thought you would approve of my idea of…a woman. What I, without realizing, wanted to be. What I wanted you to think of me," She looked up at him again.
" I…" Dan wanted to keep arguing, but he had to get something out of the way first. " Do you want me to call you anything different?"
Herbert took a moment to think, but nothing came to mind, " I don't enjoy this name but…" Then it clicked. " Doctor West,"
" Doctor West?"
West smiled and nodded, " Very good, Daniel,"
Dan smiled back before returning to his distressed expression, " So, Doctor West, why did you make the bride?"
" So that you would stay, and I could fill the hole in myself. I just explained this, Daniel," She furrowed her brows back.
" Why would you want me to stay?" He asked. " You could just…find a new assistant. Find somebody else to work with you. I was barely even allowed to work in the hospital with you after the massacre. I don't have what you wanted when we started. Why not move to California? Find a new assistant, let me go,"
Doctor West took a deep breath, " Because I care about you, Daniel,"
" So…you are in love with me?" Dan asked again.
" Yes, you could say that," She forced out. " Please don't go. I–I don't care if you don't feel the same. I just need you here, I need your help,"
" Herber–shit, sorry. West, I'm not gonna go anywhere. I love you too, we just need some boundaries and communication. Okay?"
West smiled, feeling more care and support than she'd felt since Gruber's death.
" Alright," She nodded.
" Now, I think we should hit the road. I know that I'm gonna get angry at you again. And I don't want to leave you just in a stupid heat of the moment rage," Dan said.
“ Let’s, let’s go,” Doctor West smiled, standing up and starting on her way outside.
And Dan walked with her.
Because he cared.
“ Hey, wait,” Dan said.
“ Yes?” She turned on her heels to look at him.
Dan put West’s glasses on her, “ You almost forgot your glasses,"
" Ah, thank you, Daniel,"
And finally, after so many years of confusion, she had her answer.
" We need to go, Doctor," Dan said, his words holding more respect, love, and care than he could ever comprehend.