Work Text:
When Two Wrongs Make A Right
“Oh, you’re here, too,” a quiet voice grumbled, seeing the normally calm man who would always refuse to indulge in anything that could get in the way of productivity down a shot. From how settled in he was, it was safe to assume that he’d been there for quite a bit already. “I’m guessing that means you’ve heard it too?” A short nod responded.
“Can’t believe it myself,” the man already at the bar muttered, pulling his scarf back over his mouth. For a moment, his intoxicated brain had grabbed at his scarf instinctively, ready to fight even if impaired. He hadn’t recognized the man’s voice until the second sentence. “Maijima, have you ever considered quitting?”
“Can’t say I have, Aizawa,” the man shrugged, taking a seat right next to him on the faculty couch. “How long you been here?”
“Since whenever Present Mic told me about the news,” Aizawa gave a heavy sigh. “That was about an hour ago?”
“And you?” Power Loader pointed an accusatory finger towards the man on the opposite side of the couch. “Why are you giving him a drink in the first place?”
“It’s time to celebrate!” The man jested, holding his own glass up. “After all, it isn’t too often something like this happens!”
“My downfall, you mean?” Aizawa huffed. “You’re just lucky that you don’t have him for class, All Might. Then you wouldn’t be celebrating so hard.”
Power Loader snorted, taking a glass for himself. Besides, it was after school already, so it wasn’t as if he had a ton of meetings to get to or students to take care of at the moment. Hell, even his greatest source of worry was occupied right now, over the current subject, no less!
“As if. He’d probably be showering the kid in congratulations as we speak if he happened to see him,” Power Loader hummed, feeling nothing but sympathy for the homeroom teacher. “Just call him your son already, Yagi.”
All Might chose not to respond to that. Besides, that wasn’t even the point here!
He only remembered when Present Mic burst into the faculty room about an hour ago, regaling them with a tale of what he had witnessed transpiring. Right afterwards, he had sent the staff that hadn’t been there a text message three essays long about what had gone on, filled with at least ten lines of key spamming.
~~~
Just over an hour ago…
Present Mic had just been running through his hall duty after school, all that teacher stuff. Sure, he did spend quite a bit of time with his headphones on, and probably missing a few things here and there, but a little bit of music never hurt anybody! Besides, it’s not like Nezu could somehow find out that he had been listening to music in the first place!
The beast sure did.
Anyways, he wasn’t even wearing them right now! He was doing his patrols very normally. He had, this time, been assigned to the support hallway.
And, oh, BOY, did he hear some good old gossip today!
He’d just been walking quietly, resisting the urge to whistle, when he passed by 1-H’s classroom, when he heard something quite peculiar.
“THAT’S IT!” He heard Hatsume Mei gasp, a hopeful tone in her voice. “Oh my god, THANK you, Izuku! I COULD KISS YOU!”
Present Mic blinked, but his gossip instinct, carefully learned from Midnight over the years, quickly activated. He stood right outside the door, doing what absolutely nobody should be doing, let alone a teacher, and completely eavesdropped on their conversation.
“E-Eh?!” Izuku sputtered, turning red already. “Y-You don’t n-need to do that right now, M-Mei!”
Present Mic noted how Midoriya never got flustered at the fact that Hatsume suggested kissing him, but instead that she didn’t have to do it then .
Hatsume shushed him by putting a gloved finger on his lips, a light giggle escaping her, “So?! I love you! Just ‘cause I don’t need to doesn’t mean I don’t want to!” She removed her finger, and Izuku stuttered for just a moment more–
Before Hatsume planted her lips right on his, and despite being the shorter one, she was the one to wrap her arms around his waist while Midoriya awkwardly placed his on her back.
And boy, oh boy , was Present Mic ready to tell Eraserhead of the news that would bring him nothing but pain.
~~~~~
“Why are we still here?” Aizawa muttered. “Just to suffer?” If anyone was going to recognize this reference, it would be Present Mic, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to kick his best friend while he was down. Or maybe he would.
Actually, no, he totally would.
“Aw, c’mon, Shouta!” Present Mic guffawed. “You gotta celebrate!”
“Celebrate what? The imminent destruction of all my brain cells?” His best friend sighed after putting down his glass. “There is no way, and I repeat, no possible way for this campus to survive when the two of them are together. As. A. Couple.”
Midnight, ever so convenient, burst into the door at that moment, “Oh, I just heard about the newest instance of love-filled, passionate youth!” She was holding her own glass, having heard from Present Mic that Aizawa was already drinking.
“More like my 13th reason why.” Aizawa had given up at this point, knowing full well that not even blacking out would save him from future suffering.
“Don’t worry about it, Shouta!” Midnight hummed, taking a seat right next to Midnight. “Besides, All Might, you’ve gotta be happy that you’re gonna be getting a new daughter-in-law soon, and who knows, maybe grandkids in the next few years!”
This time, the symbol of peace sputtered, his drink mixing in with his blood as he coughed into his handkerchief.
Midnight continued, “Besides, I’m willing to bet any amount of yen that the two of them will actually help each other improve as time goes on!”
Aizawa and Power Loader raised their eyebrows, both provoked with the same word, “ Any ?”
Midnight nodded.
Aizawa hummed, “How about…if they show any signs of improvement within the next month, I’ll give you my entire month’s pay.”
Power loader agreed, “That works for me. If the average amount of explosions in the workshops decreases within the next month, I’ll ALSO give you my entire month’s pay!”
Midnight licked her lips, feeling like she hadn’t made a bet, but rather made an investment into something.
~~~~~
“Wait, is Midoriya here?!” Mina shrieked out, as she avoided yet another icicle from a villain that’d escaped police custody. Apparently, the villain was A-Rank, and Mina, Mineta, Todoroki, and Uraraka were holding him off at the moment.
Uraraka responded, using her quirk on another piece of debris to help provide an escape route for any civilians still within the vicinity, “Yep!”
“So that’s why we were suddenly attacked by a villain!” Mineta chirped in, earning nods of agreement from everyone fighting.
“Wait, isn’t that Midoriya coming over here right now?” Todoroki remarked, melting the ice that the villain produced.
As the green blur dashed onto the scene, the A-Rank villain hissed, “You!”
Midoriya blinked, though kept his guard up, “What did I do to you?!”
“There’re many bounties up and running for the kid they’re calling All Might’s son!”
Todoroki sent a knowing look towards Midoriya, who refuted it with a slight stutter, “I’m n-not his son!”
Todoroki allied himself with the villain for a moment, “Sure you aren’t.”
After a few minutes…
“Hey, Midoriya,” Mineta clicked his tongue, as the medics tended to their injuries, “You avoided that icicle that was headed straight for your arm, right, even though you could’ve taken down the villain if you just took it?”
Midoriya nodded, sighing, “Yeah, I could’ve…I’ll admit, the thought came to my mind for a moment before I decided against it.”
Mineta snorted, “You shoulda.”
Uraraka furrowed her eyebrows, smacking Mineta on the back of the head, “Mineta! You want Deku-kun to get injured?!”
Mineta shook his head, holding out his hands in defense; Uraraka could really be scary when she wanted to. Not even Bakugo would choose to mess with her if she was furious enough.
“No, no, Midoriya’s my bro!” He defended himself, and Midoriya nodded–it was still unknown how Mineta of all people managed to become friends with the literal definition of sunshine–before he elaborated. “It’s just, you know–Midoriya gets hurt all the time! I haven’t seen him break a bone or two in ages!”
Midoriya pouted, feebly putting up an argument, “It’s been twelve days! That’s not ‘ages!’”
Mina butted into the conversation, having been cleared to leave, “No, that’s definitely been a while. What’s the record, Todoroki?”
“Four.”
“Wait, that’s a new record!” Uraraka whooped, and Midoriya only further pouted, seeing the others join in on the celebration, even Todoroki who only did it to tease Midoriya. At least he’s learning how to read social cues, Midoriya took the only win possible for him in that scenario.
“So, Midoriya,” Mina teased, punching him lightly in the shoulder. “What’s with you? Not only are you avoiding breaking your bones, you’re avoiding injuries entirely!”
To their surprise, Midoriya only blushed, laughing sheepishly and looking away. A soft smile came to his face, and his entire demeanor had become lighter.
“W-Well, Mei d-doesn’t like it when I get really injured, and she gets really concerned for m-me, so I-I promised that I would do my best to keep myself in good condition,” Midoriya admitted. “I-I don’t wanna break my promise t-to her, especially not after how much she showed that she cares about me…”
He kept blushing, and while he was losing himself in his mind, Mineta was running through the most efficient ways to murder somebody and get away with it. On the other hand, Uraraka smirked and let out a wolf whistle.
She put her hands on her hips, and lightheartedly taunted him, “Oh, sounds like someone’s on Hatsume’s leash!” Well, it’s not like she’s too wrong about that…she is really assertive, Midoriya pondered before trying not to let out a smile at the thought. But I really love that about her.
Mina smirked an equally large and toothy grin, instantly shaking him, “Ooh, so it’s ‘Mei?’ Not ‘Hatsume’ or anything like that?” That’s what you’re focused on? Midoriya wondered. I’ve been calling her Mei for a while!
Todoroki hummed, and with the same deadpan tone he used for anything out of combat, asked, “Does that mean that you and Hatsume are going to get married within the year?”
Midoriya’s face started steaming, “T-T-Todoroki!!!” HE’S NOT LEARNING HOW TO READ SOCIAL CUES!
Uraraka and Mina started cackling. When Midoriya gained the composure to look at Todoroki and see him with a soft smile on his face, he wasn’t so sure that his friend was as socially inept as he just presented himself to be.
Midoriya muttered, stuffing his face back into his hands, “You’re evil.”
“And you’re almost married,” Todoroki responded.
“GOD DAMN YOU, MIDORIYA!” Mineta cursed out to the heavens. “WHY IS IT ALWAYS–”
“Can you four please quiet down?” A medic called out to them. “There are still patients that need to be tended to.”
~~~~~
“Be careful, Uraraka!” Iida hissed at her, already wary. His danger instincts had been sharply honed; not from Stain or encounters with actual villains, no. His danger instincts had been sharply honed by one thing.
A single metal door.
Uraraka, for her part, only snorted at Iida’s paranoia, “Oh, it’s fine! What’s the door gonna do? Punch me?”
“Yes!” Iida hissed, harshly gripping her shoulder and trying to hold her back. “With all its weight!” There was nothing he feared more than the dull metal door and what chaos it held within. He could have actually come across All For One himself again and feel less fear than what he felt seeing this door in front of him.
Uraraka only shot him a knowing grin, completely confusing Iida. Is there something she knows that I don’t?
She confidently walked towards the door, and Iida could do nothing but pray for her. He’d wondered, Has she gone insane? He could have sworn that she, too, had seen the absolute hell that had come from that door, and the completely suicidal choice to willingly approach it without ten different layers of armor.
She only knocked on the door, and Iida had to force his eyes to still look at her. If she was going to die an honorable death, he couldn’t allow himself to just watch a fellow hero-in-training die without a witness.
Despite everything, though, Iida couldn’t trust his eyes when the door simply opened without absolutely atomizing Uraraka, and a cheerful voice went, “Oh! Pink cheeks! How’re ya’ doing?!”
“Pretty well, Hatsume!” Uraraka responded with just as much pep, her eyes glancing at Iida for just a moment, and Iida could see the absolute shit-eating grin, not on her face but her soul. “You mind helping me out for a bit?”
After a few more minutes…
“This…this can’t be!” Iida gasped, having a veritable meltdown in his mind. It was as if everything he had learned up to this point had been a lie. If this was the result of a coma that All For One had put him in at the Battle of Kamino, and he just didn’t know it, he would believe it.
Yes, the workshop was messy. There was grime and materials lying about, and it certainly didn’t live up to the expectations of cleanliness that Iida would normally hold, but then again, nothing did. You could make it so something had literally no bacteria on it and Iida would still deem it too dirty for his liking.
Either way, the workshop was messy. But it was a far cry from the actual battlefield that it used to be. Shelves were still on the wall. Table bits hadn’t been embedded in the walls. Even more so, the smell in the air was filled with what you’d expect out of a workshop, but there wasn’t the distinct smell of gunpowder or…
Explosions. In fact, there wasn’t any single marking of an explosion in the entire workshop. No black chars. No after smell of one. Hell, even as Iida looked at the rest of the workshop, the people working in it were completely carefree. There were no hints of fear for one’s safety nor any safeguard against explosions that would cause more damage than every nuke on Earth being dropped onto Britain.
“Surprised, Legs?” Hatsume smirked, still tinkering on Uraraka’s gear. “Nothing here’s burnt up into ashes!”
“But…how?!” Iida sounded genuinely flabbergasted, as his voice portrayed an emotion that he didn’t even know he had deep within him. It seemed nigh impossible, this situation he was experiencing. Had he been trapped in some alternate universe? Was he experiencing some genuine form of genjutsu?
“Ah, that!” Hatsume snapped her fingers. “I’ve been working on some gear for Izuku, but the thing is, he’s been gettin’ real worried about me hurting my body from being flung into walls so often by my own explosions!”
She walked over to another toolbox–she had to have extra ones, because some tools just had that magic feeling within them that she couldn’t just ignore–and opened it up, before smiling a little softer and a little less manic than either Uraraka or Iida could remember her ever smiling, “And I can’t just stress my precious little peanut mutter cup out!”
“M-Mei!” Izuku whined, having just walked in with his boots. “I-I thought y-you said y-you wouldn’t call me that!”
“It’s a good pun!” Mei defended herself with a lighthearted smile, giggling as she kept working. “Peanut mutter cup instead of peanut butter cup? I think I’m pretty good!”
As he walked over to the table, she booped his nose with her gloved index finger, “Besides, I promised that I wouldn’t call you that while we’re together ! Who said I couldn’t call you that with other people?!”
Izuku only cutely grumbled, prompting Hatsume to kiss him on the cheek, leaving Iida absolutely mind-boggled, “Aw, you’re so adorable! Love you~!”
Izuku turned red, before stuttering with a squeaky voice, “L-Love you too, Mei!”
Iida was caught aghast, “Midoriya! I cannot believe you would do something so egregious as fornicate on school grounds!” His definition of fornication was clearly different than it should be.
“I-IIDA!” Midoriya turned nuclear red, this time from embarrassment; there was that feeling of wanting to dig himself a hole, hide himself in it, and never emerge into civilized society ever again. “W-WE HAVEN’T D-DONE ANYTHING LIKE THAT!” Hatsume, to her credit, seemed to be completely unfazed by Iida’s words.
“Ah, calm down, Legs!” Hatsume waved a wrench in his general direction. “I don’t plan on having any babies outside of my babies until I’m well into being an adult! Even if it is with Izuku!” She gestured to both her most recent work and Izuku at the same time. “I got a ton of people to save with my work before I can focus on raising future me!”
Izuku’s flustered expression let out a soft, affectionate smile towards Mei, and Iida was caught off guard yet again.
He would’ve said, Who’s to say you two will be together and safe at that time? But he was pretty sure he would’ve met his end if he said that while both Midoriya and Hatsume were there in front of him.
Besides, he really couldn’t have when Power Loader walked up behind him and whispered in his ear, his hand grasping onto Iida’s shoulder tightly, “Just…don’t. The workshop has been so much safer ever since the two of them got together.”
Iida grimly nodded, feeling a chill run down his spine from Power Loader’s voice. This was a man who had been pushed to the brink, and he had been facing an opportunity to come back from what was certain death.
But why did he also sound like a man who owed a painful amount of money…?
~~~~~
“BAHAHAHA!” Midnight cackled, kicking her legs up in the air as she leaned back against the couch. “You two really messed up this time, didn’t you!”
In front of her was both Aizawa and Power Loader, holding checks out to her containing, wouldn’t you know it, their month’s pay.
“I didn’t expect that Problem Child could actually make it a whole month without breaking his bones,” Aizawa scoffed, extremely pissed, his first time being angry that a student had actually made progress and growth. In fact, it wasn’t even just that Midoriya had stopped breaking his bones and running into injuries; he’d been able to use the time he’d normally used recovering for more training! He’d suddenly gone from 25% to 40% just because he learned to actually control his power willingly!
“And I didn’t expect that Hatsume could make it a whole month without exploding a single thing…” Power Loader grumbled, but he felt the same sentiment. Ever since Hatsume focused more on reducing explosions, she’d been able to spend less time cleaning up messes (Granted, Power Loader usually had her clean them up in the first place) and use it to invent more stuff! It may have been at a slower pace than before, but she was still head and shoulders above every other student at U.A. when it came to working hard at the workshop. Not even the third-years could stand a chance at her productivity.
Granted, her productivity had dropped by roughly 6 hours per day–Midoriya had actually been able to get her to sleep for more than 2 hours per day–but she was still far above anybody else.
“Well, that’s all the bet was supposed to be, anyways!” Midnight snickered. “Not like either of them are going to stop training or stop being in the workshop for even an hour if they can help it! I’d pay you two back if that’d ever happen!”
Just then, however, a few voices popped up, their footsteps loud while coming alongside them.
“I can’t wait for our date, Izuku!” Hatsume giggled, a pep in her step. “Though, I kinda wanna keep working…”
“Well, two hours wouldn’t hurt, right?” Midoriya hummed, holding up two tickets. “We are heading to the Japanese Support-Tech History Museum, after all!”
The footsteps came to a halt instantly, and Hatsume whispered, “That museum…?”
Midoriya nodded, “You were talking about looking for a few sources of inspiration, so I thought a trip there would be good for both of us. We get to spend time together, and you can find your inspiration!” He brightly smiled at her.
She brightly smiled back, planting an exaggerated kiss on his cheek, “I cannot WAIT for it to be legal for us to get married!”
As the two walked off, Power Loader and Aizawa held out their hands expectantly towards Midnight, who had frozen stock still.
After a few seconds, she emotionlessly, and wordlessly, put their checks back in their hands and quietly fell back into her seat, completely deprived of the boisterous laughter she had just a minute ago.
Instead, only a single whisper came out of her mouth, “God damn it…”
Aizawa shrugged, “I guess two wrongs do make a right.”
Power Loader smirked, “You said it.”
~~~~~
Omake: oh no izuku why
Midoriya: *lying on the ground, eyes closed, relaxing, enjoying the grass and the light breeze and the warm weather*
Hatsume: Oi, Izuku, get up!
Hatsume: *steps on him*
Midoriya: *eyes still closed* Harder…
Hatsume: Eh?
Midoriya: Eh?