Chapter Text
“WELCOME LADIES AND GENTLEMEN TO ONLY THE BEST FIGURE SKATING COMPETITION IN THE WHOLE OF TEYVAT, THE FONTAINE CHAMPIONSHIPS, OVER THE NEXT SEASON THE TOP MALE FIGURE SKATERS WILL COMPETE TO EARN THE TITLE OF NUMBER ONE FIGURE SKATER OF THE SEASON ALONGSIDE THE TOP MIXED PAIR SKATERS.”
The crowd was ecstatic. Perfect. Just how he liked it. The way they would all chant his name as he entered gave him true purpose. That’s just what happened when you happened to be the number one solo skater in the world.
“HERE HE IS, THE MAN WHO HAS SET MANY NEW WORLD RECORDS AND REAWAKENED THE TRUE BEAUTY OF SKATING, THREE TIME JUNIOR FINALIST, REPRESENTING INAZUMA, PRINCE OF THE ICE, KUNIKUZUSHI”
There he was, centre of attention, adorning a black turtleneck and tight fitting leggings, complementing his notorious hair, something online blogs described as unfashionable until he arrived.
All eyes on him. The crowd was deafening. Fangirls, young children, tired college students. The whole audience was there for one thing, him.
Smile
Wave
Turn
Smile
Wave
Maintain your grace.
There was a reason he was the number one, years of hard work and the fact he had never once fallen during a competition, instead maintaining a perfect grace.
In Inazuma he was nicknamed the divine grace however opposing teams called him destroyer of dreams, easily overpassing their skaters and leaving them feeling as if their best wasn’t enough.
He couldn’t care less about anyone or anything else, this was the real world, not some fantasy where everyone drew and shook hands, he was here to win. If winning meant being completely selfish then he would happily oblige. After all, his only goal was to prove to her that he was worthy, good enough, he could achieve something with his career. Many would argue he already had, being crowned the figure skating king at 18 and maintaining the title until 21, his current age. He however disagreed. The passion burning to prove to the woman he would become more than she ever expected, wanted, needed burned so harshly his chiropractor told him if he didn’t retire in the next three years he would probably do so much damage he would never be able to skate again.
He did not care.
No one told him what to do except himself. If he could not be worthy then he was worthless. He trained for hours as a kid and yet nothing was good enough for her. Even as an adult he still heard her demanding voice as he took position. He still heard the screaming the time he failed her in the under 16s, shouting about how he wasted her money on such a useless hobby. He would push himself as far as physically possible to make that woman regret what she had said.
After finishing his skate around and show the fans what they want to see he took a place in the and waited for the other competitors to follow.
First to follow was Inazuma duo skating, two of the wealthiest brats in Inazuma. He had to hand it to the girl, she was incredibly graceful but her routines were incredibly similar, far too flowy for his liking and her brother… how he managed to get so far was anyone's guess. He could not do any sort of spins or jumps and had the grace of a literal brick. He had never dropped his partners throughout his career which was impressive yet reliability did not equal success in the skating world.
“AYATO AND AYAKA KAMISATO ALSO REPRESENTING INAZUMA IN THE PAIR SKATING”
The crowd cheered yet it was evidently quieter, Kunikuzushi had to hide his grin from the crowd, instead pretending to do his laces.
Success was definitely going to be his.
The rest of the skaters were mediocre at best.
Two idiots from Mondstadt that looked like they would kill each other before the competition even begun and a young boy who could barely stay upright, he must be their soloist but quite frankly he still looked like a junior, a kid, perhaps he had only turned seventeen recently but quite frankly Kunikuzushi did not care, this just meant an easier route to the top of the podium for him.
“KAEYA ALBERICH AND DILUCRAGNVINDR REPRESENTING MONDSTADT IN THE PAIR SKATING AND BENNET FOR THE SOLO SKATING”
From Liyue there was a short man, he remembered him from last season's final, the crowd was torn between him or this man, Xiao was it? He did not care for the names of those below him. They were very similar in fashion sense, skating style and height yet he looked so much taller as he stood above on the first place podium, looking down at the second place winner with a charming smile as described by the audience. This was an example of a good opponent, easily beaten but worth the stress.
The pair skaters for Liyue could hardly be called skaters, instead they were way too childlike, gliding around the ice together and giggling like lovestruck fools. How disgusting. Love was a useless emotion. It would get these two idiots nowhere in life. They should focus on the competition not on stupid crushes.
“TWO NEW AND PROMISING SKATERS, XINGQUI AND CHONGYUN REPRESENTING LIYUE FOR THE PAIRED SKATING. JOINED BY XIAO HIMSELF, THE ADEPTUS OF THE ICE, WINNER OF ALL HIS JUNIOR CHAMPIONSHIPS AND A WORTHY OPPONENT OF OUR CURRENT KING”
Oh as if
Natlan… Fontaine… Sumeru… none of the other skaters really stood out, sure there was one well built Sumeru skater but his posture and body language looked far too aligned to an ice hockey player. He should be none of Kunikuzushis worries.
Snezhnaya on the other hand…
The two pair skaters could only be described as beautiful. Although neither were originally from Snezhnaya they were both accepted into the Tsaritsa’s harbinger skate group, the most renowned figure skating group in the entire of Teyvat. Kunikuzushi knew them to be up to their title by the fact he had spent his junior years at the group training under none other than the skater next to him. Zandik and Rosalyne were as graceful as they came, despite his appearance, Zandik was an incredibly precise skater, timing and landing jumps and catches in a way that seemed impossible and Signora… She knew how to utilise any rink or scenario or routine to fit her perfectly. Together their skills were unstoppable, That is why they were the current world number one paired skaters.
“HERE THEY ARE, THE WINNERS OF LAST SEASONS PAIRED SKATE COMPETITION, THE DOCTOR AND THE FAIR LADY, ACCOMPANIED BY NONE OTHER THAN TARTAGLIA, A NEW ADDITION TO THE FIGURE SKATING WORLD”
ah so that’s why he hated them so much, the duo insisted on using stupid titles when in competition.
Seriously, how could people be so pretentious?
Quite frankly he was oblivious to himself whilst thinking this statement but he was quickly drawn out of such thoughts as he remembered the last skater.
A ginger, youthful looking skater, tall lanky and well built, by the way he had been introduced he could only assume he had been a hockey skater the season before, he definitely had skill but his agility was more forced, as if he was used to lunging around after the puck instead of gliding with ease. Another notable feature was how one specific group of about fifteen people, pretty much all with the same ginger hair, most likely family, went absolutely wild as he entered, leaving him a blushing mess. He looked like a high schooler. How pathetic.
For whatever reason, he knew damn well the reason, this man annoyed him a profound amount. Just one glance at that freckled face was enough for him to want to punch him.
You’re annoyed because he has something you can never have.
Why would this stupid ginger have something he could only dream of, he was the most famous Inazuman in tevat and most eligible skater too. He had everything.
He has a family, people who care. You do not.
Enough
The loudspeaker blaring through the arena was blocked out by a ringing in his ears.
Not again
His mind was replaying those words over and over again.
They stuck to him like a plague.
Shortly after the introduction there was a break, like many others he headed to the bathrooms.
He didn’t actually need the toilets though, he just needed a calm environment to collect his thoughts.
“Привет мама”
Perfect
Just perfect
Just as he went to find a peaceful space it was interrupted by this idiot ginger, given the thick accent and language change it had to be him.
What kind of psycho actually called people whilst on the toilet. It’s vile and disturbs the peace.
After about five minutes, in which Kunikuzushi attempted to not even make breathing noises and sat patiently as not to startle the man, the conversation came to an end.
“я заставлю тебя гордиться”
Yes that was definitely the call ending noise. It was finally safe.
And then came the tears.
What the fuck was wrong with this man.
Giving up on trying to stay somewhat hidden, Kunikuzushi loudly opened the door and started washing his hands.
Soon enough the dishevelled looking ginger exited his stall.
“Sorry about that… I didn’t think anyone was in here because it was so quiet”
What the fuck?
Why did he sound so wrong?
That was definitely not a Snezhnayan accent, it was as if he was forcing it to sound Fontainian or something and failing miserably.
“Your accent sounds fucking stupid.”
The man next to him looked incredibly shocked at the fan favourites attitude.
He was probably thinking something along the lines of whoever he was working for must be giving him hell to make him act perfect around fans, maintaining a smile at all times.
That was partially right, he hated his manager, the absolute bitch hardly skated yet his mother insisted from a child that he must do her every will. She was an incredible coach, he would give her that much, being able to give him the exact advice and tips and constructing his award winning sequences.
He had to cut her some slack though, she was the only person he knew that had communication with his mother, if he could impress her enough she promised to send word to the woman he desperately wanted to please. She was however a manipulative twat so whether or not she was telling the truth was a fifty fifty chance, he couldn’t risk it though, he couldn’t get rid of the last chance to prove his worth.
“Oh yes sorry I just thought maybe it would seem more natural, not many people appreciate such a strong accent.”
“Focus on skating not speaking.”
“I will do just that, thanks for the incredible advice Kuni.”
“What did you just call me?”
“Ha you look so angry, I called you Kuni, a nickname, something friends have for one another but considering your temper you probably don’t have any.”
“We are not friends and never will be, you call me Kunikuzushi or preferably don’t speak to me at all.”
“Alright kuniku I’ll see you around.”
If he didn’t punch that stupid smirk off that gingers face now then he would do it later without a doubt. How he was going to survive so long with this man he didn’t know.
“Wash your hands you fucking pig, you’ll be easy to beat if you’re so forgetful, I bet you’ll end up crying to your mommy on the phone about how you overslept and missed the first round. You are pathetic, everyone here was selected for their skills so grow up and prove you deserve a place here or go back to your overprotective mother and cry yourself to sleep, unable to stop thinking about how you wasted your life chasing someone else’s dream.”
He had never met someone more unpredictable than this man.
Within seconds he was being pushed against the wall and choked.
Maybe he had touched a nerve but this was most certainly an overreaction.
“I’ll prove I deserve a place here if it’s the last thing I do, I can’t wait to see your expression when I’m smirking down from the top of the podium you fucking pretentious cunt.”
As the hand around his throat began to squeeze harder, his vision becoming patchy, the door swung open and the short figure stood in it gasping.
“Shit I’m sorry I didn't mean to interrupt, don't hurt me please!!”
The figure was shaking in fear, arms raised above his head in a shielding manner. It was clearly that young kid, he must be pretty good to be in a competition for the over seventeens whilst looking so well… young yet right now he looked unstable and terrified. To be successful in the skating world you had to be fearless and poised with grace.
Poor kid, his first ever big competition and he probably thinks he’s about to get jumped in the bathrooms.
After being rather rudely dropped, Kunikuzushi gently massaged his neck and spoke up, attempting to reassure the kid.
“Nothings going to happen to you so don’t worry, we’ll be leaving now anyway”
So he left, slamming the door behind him, filled with the most venomous rage he had ever experienced.
That ginger fucked better lose the first round or he would personally kill him in his sleep. Or he could sabotage his skates, make him humiliate himself in front of his family and have them turn their backs on him just like his mother… oh
The whole atmosphere around him had gone silent.
The ringing in his ears was back again.
He was back at the junior championships, his final performance after making it to the finals. Everything had to be perfect.
His sequence was something even the experienced seniors would be hesitant to try.
His program consisted of many jumps and spins, many triple axels but one thing he had been forbidden to do was a quadruple axel. It was far too risky for someone of his age.
So what did he do during his final program?
A quadruple axel.
Did he nail it?
Of course
But as he looked into the crowd for his mother, a smile of pure joy plastered on his naive and young face he was met with an expression devoid of proudness, instead an uncontainable fury.
After his program ended she dragged him into an empty room without getting the chance to receive his final score or anything really.
“I HAVE FUCKING HAD IT WITH YOU KUNIKUZUSHI”
“Did I not make you proud?”
“PROUD?? PROUD?, YOU HAVE BROUGHT NOTHING BUT SHAME ONTO ME, THINK OF WHAT THEY'LL SAY ABOUT ME, RECKLESS TO INCLUDE SUCH A HARD THING IN MY OWN SONS PROGRAM? THAT COULD'VE ENDED YOUR CAREER KUNIKUZUSHI, A CAREER I WORKED TIRELESSLY TO BUILD AND PAY FOR”
“ILL SHOW YOU SHAME, IVE DONE NOTHING BUT FOLLOW YOUR STUPID RULES MY ENTIRE LIFE, WHY CANT YOU LET ME DO SOMETHING I WANT TO DO FOR A CHANGE. YOU HAVE DONE NOTHING BUT TAKE MY FREEDOM AND I'M SICK OF IT”
In return for his outlash, he revived a harsh slap to his cheek, a reminder of his position in comparison to her.
“I should’ve trusted her, she told me this would happen from the very start. You, Kunikuzushi have never and will never make me proud, I wish no longer for you to be my son. You will finish your training with Miko and I will only see you again when I deem you worthy of my love. This is what happens when you refuse your own mothers kindness. You’re a spoiled, disgusting brat”
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN? WHERE ARE YOU GOING? YOU CAN'T LEAVE ME, I'M JUST A KID WHERE ARE YOU GOING, COME BACK, I'M SORRY JUST COME BACK, CAN'T WE TALK THIS THROUGH?”
And then the doors shut, his mother had gone.
True to her word she still had not returned, hell she could’ve been dead by now and he was still living to prove something so stupid in a naive unawareness.
He remembers staying in that room for an hour. Screaming and begging, waiting for her to return and for the opportunity to laugh, laugh about how gullible he was and how she loves him, she cares enough not to leave. It was probably one of those funny pranks.
But that never happened, instead he was dragged out by security and frowned upon by Yae Miko.
He remembered the pledge he made to himself that day, as he cut his hair and stared into the mirror. He would do anything in his power to make that woman regret, to make her love him again. He did not care for consequences, he could deal with them afterwards.
He learned not to care, not to care for those around him, not to care for the careers he ruined. He learned how to isolate himself from society in order to succeed.
He was obsessed with the idea of being worthy, it became such a major part of him that his psychologist, Dr Kaedehara, would give him pills every three months and despite him claiming to not need them, he would return on the three month mark with no pills left to spare.
He honestly couldn’t remember when he was prescribed so many but he was taking all different types of medication daily, antidepressants, anti-anxiety pills, natural mood stabilisers, zolpidem before bed and something else he genuinely couldn’t remember the use or name for.
At certain points the doctor had advised to lower dosage or stop taking certain onesbut the pills had become such a major crutch for Kunikuzushi he was unable to go without them. The doctor had also banned Kunikuzushi from drinking caffeine, his daily coffee. He did not listen. This may (definitely) added to his problems but he couldn’t go without it anymore.
He was a man on the edge, yet he couldn’t stop, these drugs made him numb, unable to feel the burden of his past instead focusing on the future, a drive to success.
“ Kunikuzushi ?”
“Yeah… sorry I zoned out there.”
Rubbing his temple he turned to face the woman, despite still wearing his skates she was much taller than him.
“You need to check in at the hotel, I’ve emailed you the documents so go sort it out, and do us all a favour and stop seizing up like a baby and making everyone's life harder when you think about her.”
“How did you know?”
Not why would you say that, he knew how he would be such a burden at certain times, he knew how hard he was to manage.
“Because it’s all you ever think about, will she ever love me? If I push myself hard enough maybe she will care. If I do stupid things maybe she’ll regret the decision. Kuni, she’s not coming back, deep down you know this so please stop telling yourself she will, you’re only doing more harm on your body.”
And harm leads to injury and injury leads to inability to skate and the inability to skate leads to a failed career, a waste of money.
She only ever cared for money, not him and his dreams. If anything he was just an object to her, a toy she invested in.
“I see, I’ll work on it.”
As he turned to find the hotel he was stopped by her sickening fake voice.
“Oh and Doctor Kaedehara wanted me to tell you he’s going to stop prescribing your meds, all of them.”
He swung back around faster than Miko could blink, twisting his neck and nearly falling in the process but the information she had just dumped onto his back was far too much for him to care for temporary pain.
“What did you just say?”
“Well you’ve got competitions coming up so you’ll be sleeping fine and the adrenaline will be enough to satisfy your anxiety, it was the doctor's decision not mine Kunikuzushi, he deemed you ready to stop.”
Up until the last bit she had been able to convince him it was the truth but despite his doctors pleas for him to lower the dosages and take them in intervals, he had never even suggested Kunikuzushi should stop taking a single one. This fucking horrible woman…
“You’re lying, he knows I’m not ready, even if he thought I was he would do it gradually, he’s a good doctor, he knows exactly what i need and when, you do not. He wouldn’t do this, Miko I don’t know what you’ve done but it’s too far, you’re depriving me of something I need goddamnit.”
“You’re foolish, I can see why she left you, hell if I could’ve gone with her I would’ve, in your head you are still a little boy Kunikuzushi, you can’t move on past your childhood because of your own stupidity, if anything I’m helping you so shut up and learn be grateful.”
He could barely breathe at this point.
“How is this helping me if anything you’re-“
Slap
He didn’t remember even telling it to but his hand was gently touching the area she had slapped, it stung, it really stung. It was probably red and angry looking, she sure did have some strength.
“Kuniku?”
Two pairs of eyes immediately went towards the thing that had interrupted them. That fucking ginger bitch. This time however he was holding some sort of baked good, specially wrapped in a brown paper bag.
“I’m sorry for earlier, my mother always advised me to give back a gift as a gesture of true repentance so here, please take it.”
Regretfully he took the bag and opened it, inside was a sugar cookie made to look like a cat? It was a bit dodgy looking, having an uneven amount of whiskers.
“Sorry if it tastes weird or anything, I made it myself.”
Despite his hatred for that man he couldn’t help but smile, he could breathe again now and wasn’t shaking as much.
“Thank you… what was your name again?”
“It’s… Ajax but people call me Childe or Tartaglia sometimes, hey do you mind helping me find the hotel?, we’ve all been assigned the same one, think of all the parties we can have, but I genuinely can’t find it.”
“Yeah I suppose.”
With that he was dragged away from the scene with no more words exchanged, the man having an iron grip on him.
“Why are you in such a hurry? You seem to know exactly where it is by the way you’re dragging me, get the fuck off me.”
There goes kind Kuni.
“Who the fuck was that woman.”
“Just my manager.”
“Why did you let her hit you like that, it’s literally abuse and you could get her fired for it.”
“Its not like that… just mind your own fucking buisness ok? Stay away from me and I’ll stay away from you.”
“We’re competitors Kuni, we are going to be stuck with each other for a long time, I can’t go on to see that woman treat you like that if it’s going to be a common occurrence, if you don’t do anything then I will.”
“STOP ACTING LIKE YOU CARE. We just met and I don’t know you and she was trying to help, yeah… I was struggling to breathe and so she slapped me to make me focus on something and set my head straight, she’s doing what she needs to do to make my career successful, don’t fucking speak to me again or I’ll fucking have you Tartaglia.”
“I do care, so just let me help, you’re the best skater here by far and I want to make sure you stay healthy so just let me help!”
“We are here to compete. The whole point is to be against each other, you will lose if you cling onto friendship, this isn’t about being friendly this is about winning, if you came here to make friends then so be it but I didn’t so you do you and I’ll stick to myself and be the successful one.”
“We all have motivations for being here, don’t let yours get to your head, God I can see why you need those pills now.”
In a look of absolute betrayal and anger the ginger was met with Kunikuzushis death stare.
“How much did you fucking overhear?, that was a private conversation you moron, you… you… you’re ruining everything.”
In some sort of fit he began punching the ginger who proved not to be at all affected, looking curiously at the shorter man and guiding his shoulder to the nearest door.
“That’s your room, I’m across the corridor and left one of you need me.”
“I’m not fucking finished with you stop being a pussy.”
He was probably thinking something along the lines of this man really had no chill,
To be fair he did not, just earlier he had first hand experienced the strength in those hidden muscles and even now his neck still felt bruised.
“Calm down Kuni, if any arena staff come up here to check on us or competitors we could get reported and either you or both of us disqualified.”
That did not stop the fury ablaze in Kunikuzushis heart. Why he was doing this he honestly couldn’t say but he just felt a desire to express his emotions on this poor guy. A punchbag if you will.
“Do you want me to speak to that lady? Ask her to reconsider the whole thing?”
That got the man’s attention
“What do you mean?”
“I mean I saw the slap, I can use it against her, make her ensure you get the meds you need and I’ll not tell anyone about her behaviour. You might not think it but I’m really good at the whole manipulation thing.”
“That isn’t something to be proud of.”
“You act nice around your fans and yet have such a big superiority complex it’s sickening, I’m sure that’s not something to be proud of either.”
“I don’t need your help stupid kid, leave me alone for fucks sake.”
“I tried but you kept hitting me.”
“YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.”
The other man looked incredibly startled at the sudden outburst.
“Are you ok?”
“This is a skating competition not therapy please just leave me alone.”
“Ok but please let me know if you need anything.”
Fine he had won.
“Ok ok I will.”
“Get some rest now, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
This fucking bitch. Acting like he hadn’t screamed at him just minutes before.
He supposed a rest would be good…
Tomorrow was the first of two days of practice, he needed to make sure his routine was perfect, it may only be his short program but even a few points could be what it takes to win.
He needed to stop stressing and take his pills and sleep…
He’d taken them two hours ago, he wasn’t falling asleep for some reason. Maybe it was the extra release of adrenaline or stress his body was experiencing but either way his pills seemed to not be working.
He couldn’t just lay in bed all night though.
He needed a distraction…