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“Yuuji. Hey. Yuuji, come on.”
A not-so-gentle shove brought him back to reality, all details coming into focus with a sharp pang as Yuuji blinked and looked up into the eyes of his twin who wore an annoyed look on his face.
“Fucking finally, daydreaming again?”
Sukuna stood over him, bent at the middle to inspect Yuuji who was lying on the bed, a magazine on his stomach as his phone kept quietly playing music. It had been one of those rare afternoons that neither of them had any work to do and they had just been lazing around. Nothing out of the ordinary, just that Sukuna had been acting weirdly recently.
“Mhm, not really… just dozing off,” Yuuji replied with a hum, not bothering to stop his brother from snatching up the magazine. “Haven’t had a chance to nap in ages.”
“Yeah well, and whose fault is that?” Sukuna had no mercy with him, skimming over the article as his features darkened with each word. “Ever since you started hanging out with them, you’ve hardly been able to keep up–”
“Ugh not again! Come on, I’m just trying to make new friends!”
“What for?! We’ve been doing fine, just the two of us–”
“We’re siblings, it’s not the same.” Yuuji sat up and was ready to leave the room. They’d had this argument over and over during the last three weeks and it had never resolved in anything favourable. On the contrary, he had felt that Sukuna was slipping away from him but… he also didn’t want to lose the first friends he’d ever made. Living in a golden cage with public scrutiny around the clock wasn’t easy, making friends was even harder because people did not see the person you were but only the personality you stood for. Therefore, meeting Kugisaki and Fushiguro who hailed from similar backgrounds and were used to others trying to use them... It was nice.
Yuuji also felt less like a loser because he didn’t hang out only with his brother anymore.
That didn’t mean he didn’t like spending time with his brother! It wasn’t anything like that, he loved his brother, more than anyone in the world. Nobody would ever be able to replace Sukuna or steal his spot in Yuuji’s heart but he still thought it wasn’t too bad spending some time apart.
“Of course, it’s not the same! We are a team, it’s you and me against the world, have you forgotten that promise?” Sukuna’s eyebrows knit together, and the familiar anger settled into his gaze as he tried to stare down Yuuji like their fight was just a simple staring contest and whoever held out the longest would be in the right.
“I haven’t,” Yuuji tried to defend himself. “But don’t you think there’s something for us to learn from others as well? You’re still my favourite person in the whole world.” He softened his voice at the end, trying to convey his feelings this way but the hurt in Sukuna’s eyes didn’t vanish. It also didn’t stop him from turning on his heels and storming out of the room, leaving the door wide open and for Yuuji to close.
—
“Hello, good morning, angel!” Gojou’s voice rang through the open-plan kitchen, echoing off the chrome surfaces of the cabinets. It was only 6:30 and while Yuuji usually was a morning person and the easiest to be won over by their manager’s antics, today was an exception.
Sukuna hadn’t come home the day before.
He had not answered any messages or calls.
In fact, he hadn’t even read them. He had either turned his phone off completely or blocked Yuuji. Neither of these options sounded particularly thrilling and left a bitter taste in Yuuji’s mouth.
“What’s that? Anything happened?” Gojou stopped in his tracks, blinking over the rim of his black shades. The man looked absolutely ridiculous with his baby blues peeking down at him and Sukuna would always be the first to poke fun at that fact. And yet, he wasn’t here now to share this moment. “By the way, where’s your twin? Finally bit the bullet and went to Getou?”
The legendary rivalry between the two managers was one of the tabloids’ favourite topics, always pitting their latest protégés against each other to compare the men’s finesse. Outside their circle, nobody knew the two were actually married and just enjoyed the splash they made. Both of them being attention whores, they basked in the headlines and used the media for their own desires, giving exactly those people the spotlight that needed it the most at the moment. It was a beautiful display of puppeteering and marketing, but not even that could lighten Yuuji’s mood today.
“He left yesterday and hasn’t come home yet. We fought.”
“Of course, you fought, siblings always fight.”
“Aren’t you an only child?” It was all too easy to fall for Gojou’s traps on a usual day, but today he wouldn’t let his worries be dissolved with a wave of his hand. He was worried after all.
“Well yeah, but isn't it just like a marriage? Sometimes you have to fight to find common ground and make sure you’ve really given it your all.” Gojou shrugged before he sighed: “But I guess if you’re that worried, it won’t be much use going over your lyrics. Go, find your bratty twin and give me a call when you’re ready.”
Yuuji hadn’t counted on getting out of his practice session that easily but apparently, Gojou wasn’t in much of a mood either. Just the better for him and his mission: find Sukuna and drag him home from wherever he had gotten himself into. He just knew his brother needed help since he attracted trouble like nothing else.
—
After some careful deliberations, Yuuji decided on calling in the cavalry. Kugisaki accepted his request easily enough, rapping on his door just a little later.
“You know I have a doorbell, yeah?”
“Yes but this called for kicking your door in,” she simply declared upon entering before she stopped dead in her tracks. “Where the fuck is Fushiguro? I thought he’d be here by now.”
Yuuji rubbed the back of his neck, trying to find the right words but he couldn’t. So he simply went for the truth: “Couldn’t reach him, phone’s turned off.”
“Ugh, one of those days,” Kugisaki groaned, rolling her eyes wildly. “Seriously, I don’t know why I keep spending time with him when he just drops off the face of the earth whenever there’s an emergency.”
This didn’t sit right with Yuuji, after all, he just knew his twin was probably in some trouble, it wasn’t a full-blown emergency just yet. He simply wanted to defend his new-found friend: “Wait a second now, I’m just they’re both fine. There’s really no need to disturb Fushiguro if he needs some alone time. I guess the paparazzi got bad again–”
“You have no idea! They just get more annoying each day. ‘Fushiguro, look here. Fushiguro, is it true your uncle got in trouble with the law? Fushiguro, what about your father? Fushiguro, Fushiguro, Fushi–”
“Alright, that’s enough.” With a practised motion, Yuuji simply put one hand on Kugisaki’s mouth, stopping the imitation of the yellow press hounding their friend at every chance they got. “I don’t even want to imagine what it must be like.”
“Don’t worry, he’s been in the limelight all his life, that’s what being a Zenin means, even if you’re not even an official member of the clan.” She shrugged before her look turned businesslike. “So, let’s forget about him and get started with your problem. Your twin. Where have you seen him last?”
“Well, over there… we fought and then he just left. He has ignored all my calls and messages. He hasn’t contacted Gojou either.”
Kugisaki stalked towards the door leading to Yuuji’s room, turning back to him. “So, I am Sukuna now, I am upset because we fought–”
“Nah, he’s… he doesn’t mind fighting. Sometimes he just provokes a fight so we can make up.”
“Well, then what did you fight about?”
An awkward silence settled over them as Kugisaki looked at him expectantly, waiting for his reply but it felt wrong. Would it be rude to just state the truth? Saying that they had fought about her and Fushiguro? Yuuji didn’t want to blurt that out. He didn’t want to jeopardise their blooming friendship because of a sibling spat. But then, she wanted to help him–
“So?”
“Uhm, just… stress and free time and stuff,” he mumbled, not even persuading himself. Yuuji was sure he couldn’t fool Kugisaki of all people but she seemed so absorbed in her investigation that she didn’t even question his answer. Now he was the one to feel guilty. Great.
“Of course, we know it. So, I am Sukuna. I am upset that we don’t have enough free time to spend together. I am high strung from our approaching concert in front of thousands of people, our duet is just not as perfect as it could be because you’re not practising hard enough. I need to clear my head, just get out of this restrictive place.” Her latest words seemed a bit dramatic given the very open and generous layout of the apartment, not leaving much to be desired in a shared living space. But she just sounded too convincing that Yuuji didn’t dare to intervene. He simply followed her out the front door and to the elevator, retracing his twin’s footsteps.
—
Even after hours of walking through the city, taking taxis and getting crowded by fans eager to take a snap with their favourite actress and singer together, Yuuji and Kugisaki hadn’t been able to find Sukuna.
His twin remained missing.
It didn’t help that Yuuji’s heart skipped a beat every time he received a message and it turned out to be someone else. Sukuna’s phone stayed stubbornly offline.
—
At 5:30 pm, Yuuji wished he hadn’t heard from his twin.
Well, not directly from Sukuna, but slowly, news outlets had picked up on a story of the night before and within minutes it was a big thing.
Fushiguro Megumi and Itadori Sukuna seen together on the way out of a bar .
Fushiguro Megumi and Itadori Sukuna getting into a taxi together.
Itadori Sukuna’s hands possessively all over Fushiguro, shielding him from cameras the way he usually only did it for Yuuji.
—
Two hours later, Sukuna finally made it home. He wore a black hoodie that obviously wasn’t his own.
Yuuji looked up from his glass. It had long been empty, only filled and emptied once. He hadn’t trusted his stomach to hold anything else, let alone more liquor. He had never been good at it, always Sukuna’s strength.
“Where have you been?”
His voice sounded hollow to his own ears. Would Sukuna pick up on it? Or would he ignore it?
“Out,” Sukuna huffed, pulling off the hoodie and revealing the black shirt he had been wearing the day before he had left. “Isn’t that what you wanted? Getting out there, up and close with other people?” He didn’t look him in the eye, he simply threw the weirdly offensive piece of clothing on the sofa instead, before he swaggered around the kitchen island, stopping at a safe distance from Yuuji.
“That’s… not like that. Not with…”
“Fushiguro? Why not? He’s a nice enough guy.” Sukuna chuckled and simply shrugged before he stopped himself: “Actually, no, he isn’t. He’s pretty ruthless, more like someone I’d get along with. You know–”
“Stop!”
He didn’t want to hear it anymore. Yuuji didn’t remember when exactly he had jumped from the bar stool but sure enough, he was standing with clenched fists. Something wasn’t right, breathing became difficult and his heart felt like it wanted to jump right out of his chest.
“He’s my friend! And you… you are… you , I–”
“You what ?”
Yuuji wanted to jerk back when Sukuna was suddenly right in front of him, a glowering look on his face. But as always, his older twin was faster than him, one arm barring his exit route, the other grabbing his arm so there was no running away. They were left to stare at each other instead.
Sukuna wanted an answer, it hadn’t just been a rhetorical question. He knew that much. But how could he reply when he didn’t even know what he was thinking, what he was feeling?
Yuuji’s body was switching from hot to cold and back to hot, sweat trickling down his neck as heat crawled up his cheeks. Despair clawed its way up, up, up his throat only to choke off any words that could have made it out. He felt like a man in the desert, thirsty for freshwater but all he got was a mirage of a reality that couldn’t be–
“What is it, baby brother?” Sukuna leant in, his eyes sly like a serpent but his voice, his voice was as smooth as velvet, existing to soothe any ache that could ever threaten Yuuji. It had always been like that. It had always been a tone reserved for Yuuji only, never making it into one of their songs no matter how much he begged and pleaded. Right now, he was glad for his brother’s stubbornness on the matter. This was his piece and his alone, that one part of his twin he’d never share with anyone. Except… had he used that voice with Fushiguro?
White hot anger set in and for a second, Yuuji saw red. His hands landed on Sukuna’s shoulders and pressed him back against the kitchen counter.
The surprise in his eyes was new; enough to have Yuuji stop for a split second. Not new enough to stop in his tracks completely though.
“I don’t want to see you with others. I hated seeing you with him. You had no right… he doesn’t deserve…”
What exactly?
His own thought brought him back and Yuuji felt like a bucket of ice-cold water had been emptied over his head. What was it that Fushiguro didn’t deserve? To see his brother the way he saw him? Wasn’t he just being the worst brother of all right now? After all, maybe Sukuna and Fushiguro had hit it off well, maybe they were more than just a one-night stand and maybe Yuuji was just making a giant scene over something that meant a lot to his twin.
Before he could lift his hands off Sukuna’s shoulders, he was pulled into a tight embrace. Warm breath hit his neck and tickled the tiny hairs there. It felt so familiar, exactly the way when they fell asleep next to each other. This gesture alone felt like a heavy weight being lifted off him. He couldn’t just have ruined everything between them if that was the reaction.
The following whisper was confirmation enough when Sukuna sighed: “Fuck, that’s all I wanted to hear from you, baby brother. He got nothing on you, it’s always been you.”