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Lumine has been awfully busy these past few days. Scaramouche doesn’t ask why – she had told him she’d be at Liyue Harbor and asked him if he wanted to join her, to which he said no. Despite the fact they would go their separate ways during the day, they would always meet at the teapot at night, and sleep in the same bed, cuddled up under the blankets and sharing warmth. Lumine would ask him how his day had been, and Scaramouche would answer vaguely; if he asked the question back she’d just do the same.
At the very back of his head, an annoying voice kept telling him foul words. It would taunt him, like a sharp-tongued spoiled brat, incessantly repeating how “she’s getting tired of you”, “you’re useless to her now”, “she’ll soon discard you just like everyone else”.
Scaramouche tried his best to ignore those words, but the more the days passed, the more they would pester him. He was afraid of falling asleep alone, and find himself haunted by those ideas in his worst nightmares.
Lumine was well aware of the tension on his shoulders, and the stronger grip around her waist when they were cuddling in bed at night.
“How was your day?” Lumine asks, lips pressed against the softness of his hair.
“It was… Decent.” Scaramouche answers. “You?”
“Tiring.” she makes a brief pause. Thinks about her next words. “Is there anything bothering you lately?”
Scaramouche hates how much she easily sees through him.
“No.” he answers, a twinge of annoyance in his voice.
“I see…” Lumine mutters, holding him tighter, closer. She has learned not to try and pry information out of Scaramouche. He’ll talk to her, right? If not now, maybe later, tomorrow.
“Why do you think that?” he hears himself asking.
“No idea.” Lumine says gently. “Maybe I’ve been too tired lately.” she decides. She knows she’s not wrong; there’s definitely something wrong with Scaramouche.
They fall into silence once again. Despite the tiredness, Lumine doesn’t feel like falling asleep.
“Kunikuzushi.” she calls. The meaning of the name is heavy, but her voice always sounds so soft and soothing as she says it. Like it’s a prayer, or her favorite tune.
“Hm.” he mumbles.
“Have you heard about the Lantern Rite Festival?”
“Yeah. I guess. Why?”
“It’s happening. Soon.” she says, thinking about how busy her last few days have been. “I’ve been helping out with it.”
“Is that so.” he mutters.
“The highlight of the festival should happen in a few days.” she reminds, and she sounds genuinely excited about it. “Do you wanna come with me to watch it?”
Scaramouche’s first thought is ‘why do you need to watch it with me out of all people ’, but he decides not to voice it.
“No.” he shuts the idea down. “There will be too many people.” and he closes his eyes, as if he’s already going to sleep (he only sleeps after he’s sure Lumine is asleep, however).
Lumine sighs.
“Alright.” she mumbles, and she sounds genuinely disappointed. Scaramouche tries not to think too much about it.
She has so many friends, it’s not like he’ll make a difference, right? She can find someone else to make her company. The thought makes a bitter taste settle in his mouth. He suddenly misses the sweetness of Lumine’s Tricolor Dango.
Scaramouche is dumb. He knows this. He’s painfully aware. Yet, he can’t help but follow after Lumine like a dog who loyally only follows one master.
She doesn’t know it, however. It’s the most important day of the Lantern Rite festival, and she’s hopping around the streets, greeting friends and helping with the last minute preparations for the night. Scaramouche lingers in the shadows (where he belongs, the annoying voice in his head tells him), watching over her. Under the golden lights of the lanterns scattered all over the city, Lumine shines even brighter than usual. The voice tells him that someone as dark as him could never stand so close to a light so bright as her. Scaramouche wishes it would shut up.
There’s something wrong, however. Her eyes aren’t as bright as usual, and her smile, despite being genuine, doesn’t reach her eyes. It’s like something is missing. Scaramouche tells himself it’s because she’s too tired (there’s no way she’d ever miss you, the voice tells him); she has been helping with the festival preparations for weeks now.
Luckily enough, Lumine isn’t as dumb. She knows he’s watching; she’s tuned to his presence like it’s the only thing she’s ever known. From the corner of her eyes, she can see his bitter expression, no matter how much or how hard he tries to hide his face under his wide hat.
She can’t smile brightly, not when she knows he isn’t happy. She tries to get her tasks done as fast as possible so she can chase after him and talk to him.
“Great! Now we only have one more…” Paimon celebrates. Lumine throws a sidelong glance to a building to her side, noticing a shadow looming over it.
“Is it too hard?” she asks, urgency present in her voice.
“Hm? No, not really. Just deliver these bags to…”
“Can you handle it?” Lumine asks. She seems so antsy it’s like she’ll blast off like a lit firework at any given time.
“Yes, I can!” Paimon nods. “Why? You got an upset tummy?”
“No, I just remembered a last-minute errand I have to run.” Lumine reassures. Paimon notices how her smile is different from how she’s been smiling all night long.
“Okay, go ahead! Paimon can handle this!” she reassures.
“Okay, thank you!” Lumine says profusely. “I’ll make you a very tasty dinner afterwards.” and she all but dashes away as fast as possible.
“You better not forget about that promise!” Paimon yells after her, then goes back to the task she has to do.
Lumine chases the shadow around, through the buildings and streets of Liyue Harbor. She doesn’t know if the shadow is purposefully avoiding her, or if it’s just that good at staying hidden, but she doesn’t give up.
“Kunikuzushi.” she calls, breathless. Her chase has brought her all the way up to Yujing Terrace. Despite the festival going on, the place is awfully empty; most people are at the docks, where most stalls and events are.
Scaramouche freezes. He wasn’t expecting her to find him. He hesitantly turns around, face contorted into a frown.
“How long have you known?” he asks.
“A long time.” she smiles. It’s a genuine smile, one that reaches her eyes and makes her glow even brighter. “You can’t fool me.” she concludes as she walks closer.
“Very well.” he crosses his arms over his chest. “You’ve done it. You found me. Congratulations.” he says bitterly.
Lumine stops one step away from him. She takes one of his wrists and brings it closer to her, uncrossing his arms. The act is far from being rude or demanding; it is actually very gentle and soft.
“What is wrong, hm?” she asks, holding his hand between hers, playing with his fingers like it’s the only thing capable of soothing her storming thoughts. “I know you said there’s nothing wrong, but you can’t fool me.”
Scaramouche sighs. He really can’t hide anything from her.
“There’s a voice in my head telling me you’re going to discard me soon.” he blurts out. Despite the mocking smirk and the bitter tone, he sounds exhausted.
Lumine immediately looks up, eyes wide.
“I’m going to beat you up.” and she frowns, like she’s offended at the voice for ever saying such outrageous things to him.
Scaramouche chuckles.
“Please do.” he agrees.
Lumine looks down, one of her hands holding one of his hands while the other plays with his fingers mindlessly. She often does that before kissing each knuckle, which is one of the punishments of Scaramouche’s “time out”.
“I’m sorry.” she suddenly blurts out. “I… Have been distant these past few days, I know.”
“Don’t be.” Scaramouche says. “It’s… You have your own life to live, after all.”
Lumine looks disappointed at the words. She brings his hand closer to her lips then quickly kisses his knuckles as she thinks about her next words.
“I’ve been… Holding back.” she confesses.
“During our sparring matches?” Scaramouche asks, seemingly offended.
“No.” she deadpans, looking up at him with determined eyes. “I’d never hold back on those.”
“Good, you better not.” he answers with a similar expression.
Lumine takes a deep breath. Scaramouche has never seen her like this. It’s almost as if… She’s scared.
“It’s complicated. It involves feelings. Feelings that… I don’t want to push onto you. Not yet. It’s too early for that.” she says. The entire time, she doesn’t look at him.
Scaramouche feels like pulling his hand away. The touch is warm, and he wants to indulge in it for a while longer.
“What… What kind of feelings…?” he asks, afraid of the answer. He can feel something in his chest sinking to his stomach.
“They’re not negative feelings.” Lumine states, like she’s sure of what goes on his mind. “They’re feelings that are often shared, but… I don’t want to push them onto you.”
“Why not?” he asks. He’s confused.
“Because I don’t want to lose you.” she concludes, looking up at him. Their eyes meet, and Scaramouche feels a shiver going down his spine.
“What? What makes you think…” he doesn’t know how to word his thoughts. “That’s stupid, Lumine.”
She laughs. Scaramouche revels in the sound, despite his confusion.
“I know. Certain feelings can make you act in a very stupid way.” she says. He frowns.
“I don’t understand.” he states.
“It’s okay.” she nods. “One day, you will.”
“No, not that.” he shakes his head. “I understood the part in which you said certain feelings can make you act stupid. I mean- I’m acting stupid right now. I followed you around thinking I was being sneaky when I wasn’t- but that’s beside the point.” he rants. “I don’t understand how that ties to the sharing thing, and how it ties to you losing me.”
Lumine blinks. Once. Twice. She really wants to kiss him, but she knows it’s not the time yet.
“Then, tell me.” she starts, feeling some sort of hope blooming in the deepest part of her chest. “Tell me why you came all the way here to spy on me.”
Scaramouche jolts, then looks away. His cheeks are fiery red.
“I… I…” he stutters. “I don’t know! Can’t I just follow you around to make sure you’re not dead?!” he argues.
Lumine laughs. He’s way too cute; he just doesn’t know it yet.
“Is that all there is to it?” she tilts her head to one side. She still holds his hand just above her heart.
Scaramouche is sure she trusts him way too much (joke’s on him – he trusts her just as much).
“No.” he answers bitterly. He’s angry at himself. “There are these funny feelings and stupid thoughts haunting me.”
The penny finally drops. Lumine’s eyes widen again.
“Oh… Don’t tell me… You’re jealous?!” she says in an amused tone. Scaramouche looks at her, noticing her lopsided grin.
He wants to punch it. Softly. With his lips. And then bite, just because he likes to pretend he’s tough (he isn’t, and Lumine knows it).
“Wha-!” he protests, although it is just a garbled sound. “Why do you think I’d be jealous of you?!”
“Oh.” Lumine pouts. Scaramouche feels the sinking in his chest again. He wants her smile back. “Then, yeah, it’s definitely too early for that-”
“No.” Scaramouche interrupts her. The hand she’s been holding now grips her hand back, and pulls her insanely closer. “You always insist that I have to talk about my feelings and shit- it’s time we talk about yours .” he argues. “Spill it.”
Lumine stares at him. Scaramouche knows the height difference between them is non-existent, but now that he’s this up-close, he’s painfully aware of it.
“But-” she tries.
“No buts. You say it. I know I suck at being… Well, like you, but I’ll listen.” he decides. “And I won’t run away, like how you think I will.”
Lumine sighs deeply.
“Alright.” she looks down, at the hand now strongly gripping her own. She presses a chaste, long kiss on the closest knuckle. “To put it simply… You’re special to me.”
“Special?” he questions. “Special how?”
Lumine looks up into his eyes. There’s a faint blush across her cheeks.
“Special like… Well, every person is unique. I love all my friends in their own way.” she explains. “But you’re different. I love you, in a special way.”
Scaramouche frowns, like it can distract him from the warmth spreading across his cheeks.
“You’re- You’re making no sense.” he stutters.
“No, hear me out.” Lumine insists, holding his hand tighter. It would be romantic, if only it didn’t look like they were about to start a physical fight. “You’re… Important to me. And I often think about holding your hands, and going on dates with you-”
“We already do that.” he points out, rolling his eyes.
“And kissing you.” she completes.
“You already do that.” he repeats.
“On the lips.” she says. There’s definitely a blush on her cheeks, Scaramouche thinks, hyper aware of the warmth across his own cheeks.
“Wha- What’s wrong with kissing me… On the lips.” he stutters. He can’t help it anymore, looking away from her.
“That’s what they call ‘love’.” Lumine says in a low voice. Scaramouche feels like something inside him just burst, flooding him with a warmth he has never felt before. “Of course, it isn’t only kissing and going on dates and holding hands… It’s…”
“It’s being afraid that you’ll lose them.” he blurts out, like a bad memory has just flashed through his brain. Lumine freezes. “And… Hoping they’d spend more time with you… And being jealous when they’re not with you…” he says, voice getting lower and lower.
Scaramouche finally lifts his eyes up to look at Lumine again.
“So you know what love is.” she deadpans, like she’s genuinely surprised.
“I’m not as stupid as you think I am.” he argues. He tries to frown to look a bit more intimidating, but he just looks like an angry cat to Lumine. “Although… You were the one who made me realize that…” he adds in a low voice, lowering his head and trying to use his hat to hide his face.
Lumine is fast, however, moving closer so she can stand under the shadow of his hat as well.
“Realize what? That you’re stupid?” she teases with a sly smile. Scaramouche frowns and pouts harder. The urge to kiss him is becoming unbearable at this point.
“No.” he answers. “I meant… What I said before…” and he looks away.
Lumine laughs, and something inside Scaramouche melts. Maybe it’s his brain. He is, indeed, going insane.
“I’m glad.” she says in a soft voice, releasing his hand so she can hold his face between her two hands. “You deserve to be happy too, Kunikuzushi.”
“I know.” he pouts, looking into her golden eyes. They’re warm, just like her. He doesn’t exactly know what he’s feeling, but it’s good. It’s way too good; and he wonders what he has done to deserve such a good thing in this life.
“And I’m honored I get to be part of your happiness.” she adds. His hands hover in the air uselessly, like he doesn’t know what to do with them (and he really doesn't).
“Sappy.” he berates. “Disgusting.”
“I know.” is the last thing she says, as their lips finally touch. If what Scaramouche felt before was a dam of warmth breaking inside him, this is a sublimation of that warmth, as it becomes a fog that makes him dizzy. He doesn’t understand how something physical can bring him so many crazy feelings and blissful happiness.
The kiss doesn’t last long – or maybe it does, Scaramouche doesn’t know. He only knows that Lumine pulls away way too soon, and he chases after her.
She laughs.
“Oh, did you like it that much?” she teases. Scaramouche pouts.
“No.” he retorts. “It was disgusting.”
“So I take it that you don’t want another one?”
“No.” he says as he leans in and presses their lips together once more. He doesn’t quite know what he’s doing, but he supposes Lumine does. He tries to pull away, but she just kisses him once again, her hands moving to hold him by the back of his head. The touch feels good, and he melts into the embrace as his hands automatically go to her waist. She chuckles against his lips, and when Scaramouche opens them to protest, she kisses him once more; and this time her tongue slips into his mouth.
His brain short-circuits for solid ten seconds. He grips Lumine’s waist tighter, a wave of new feelings crashing within him. He stands still, and lets her guide him (so that, one day, he can get back at her).
When they pull away from each other, it feels like way too much but way too little time has passed.
“Um. So.” Scaramouche stutters.
“That was good.” she decides. “Was it your first kiss?”
“No.” he immediately answers.
“I’ll take that as a yes.” she teases, and he frowns and looks away. Just then, he notices a shadow on the floor approaching…
“Oh!” Paimon exclaims. “Is… Is Paimon interrupting something…” she asks, ready to fly away as soon as the answer came.
“No… Maybe.” Lumine answers.
“Paimon is done with the errand… They’re about to release the lanterns…” and she gestures vaguely, avoiding to look directly at the scene before her.
“Ok, thank you.” Lumine says. “I’ll see you there.”
“S-See you!” she stutters, then flies away at a speed Scaramouche has never seen before.
Lumine looks back at him. He’s still pouting like an angry cat, blush spread over his cheeks.
“Then…? Wanna come with me?” she proposes.
“Only if you make me Tricolor Dango afterwards.” he negotiates.
Lumine laughs, the ripples echoing through his own body. He thinks he’s not worthy of it, but he accepts it.
“Deal.” she agrees, then immediately grabs his hand to drag him to the docks, where the main event will take part.
At the back of his head, Scaramouche sneers at the annoying voice that is now sulking because things did not go its way.