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It was an especially windy day out at Starsnatch Cliff. The grass undulated in waves under its power, almost hypnotizing. The cecilias that grew at the top of the slope swayed with it, surprisingly sturdy little things despite their fragile appearance. On days like these, their soft scent was carried all the way down the slope and into the valley below.
Kaeya walked just behind Albedo, canvases held under his arms. They had come to the cliffside with the intention of painting, but he wasn’t sure how well that would work out with how the weather was. Albedo was carrying their paints, brushes, and various other supplies. They were heavy, Kaeya knew. He had offered to carry them, but Albedo simply handed him the canvases.
Pale blond hair was tied in a ponytail, a wise choice with the wind. The way the sunlight was shining, it made Albedo’s hair appear almost white. Like starlight.
Speaking of.
“Hey, starlight,” he called. “Are you sure we’ll be able to paint with all this wind?”
Albedo paused and looked back, his hair flying wildly about his face. He attempted to blow it out of his eyes, to little success, “The wind will settle down soon.”
Kaeya looked towards the trees down where they had left the horses. Not only were the trees swaying more than usual, but the horses had their tails towards the wind. He frowned.
“Are you sure?”
Albedo rolled his eyes, “Yes. Trust me.”
They walked all the way up to the point. The day was nice and clear, the visibility so good that even Dragonspine could be seen with only minimal haze. The ocean breeze was slightly chilly, but the sunlight more than made up for it.
Albedo placed his supplies down and stretched before laying down in the grass. Kaeya followed suit, sitting next to the alchemist and watching him curiously. Albedo noticed and patted the grass, inviting Kaeya to lay down as well. So he did.
Two knights on their off day, laying down in the grass and absorbing the sun as they watched fluffy white clouds pass high overhead. There was something nostalgic about it. In the depths of his mind, he could see days from so long ago. From before everything fell apart. Kaeya knew that the feeling was a dangerous one. It made it so much easier to pry the past from his lips. He tried to shake it away, but it lingered.
Maybe you should tell him , his inner voice said. He ignored it.
There was a tap on his forehead and he opened his eyes to see Albedo hovering over him.
“The wind stopped,” the alchemist said with a self-satisfied smile.
Indeed it had, or at least it had calmed down to a much more gentle breeze. The wooden cases were opened and supplies organized. Albedo created simple easels for them to use with alchemy. Kaeya had always wondered how exactly it was possible to create objects from drawings. Watching Albedo as he did so did nothing to help him understand.
Kaeya took a seat facing down the slope and out into the valley. His canvas was set up just off to his side. He picked up a brush and twirled it in his fingers for a moment.
“Now that I’m here, I’m not entirely sure what I should paint.”
Albedo took up a seat nearby.
“Paint what you see. Or, paint what you don’t see,” he said, already beginning to mix his paints. “Either way, you should paint whatever calls to you.”
Kaeya couldn’t see the colors he was using, but it seemed that the alchemist already had something in mind, “Do you already know what you’ll be doing?”
Teal eyes betrayed nothing, “I have a few ideas.”
Albedo picked up a thin brush and began, moving it with a clear purpose. Unfortunately, the canvas was angled in a way that Kaeya couldn’t see what was being painted.
Paint what you see, or what you don’t see, he thought. Albedo was oriented towards the valley, with Dragonspine looming in the distance. Was he doing a landscape? Or something else entirely?
A landscape didn’t seem like a bad idea. It wasn’t as if Kaeya had never painted before, but it had been a long time. He began to mix his own colors, varying shades of vibrant greens and stone gray.
He approached the canvas several times, but each time he tried his brush didn’t touch. Albedo noticed his struggle.
“How’s it going for you?” he asked.
Kaeya gave a weak laugh, “I’m afraid I don’t know where to start.”
Albedo put down his brush and walked over, kneeling by Kaeya’s side. A glance at the colors on the palette and then down at the scenery in front of them was enough to guess what Kaeya wanted to do.
“You want to paint the valley and Dragonspine?”
The knight shrugged, “I would like to try.”
Albedo smiled, “Ambitious, but I suppose that makes sense for you.”
“You know, most people think I’m actually quite lazy.”
A look was thrown his way, “Do I look like most people to you?”
Kaeya returned it with a teasing grin, “Not at all.”
“Hmmm…there’s so much here,” Albedo absentmindedly slid the brush out of Kaeya’s hand. “Start by defining your borders, what do you want at the edges of your canvas?”
With a few simple lines, the general edges of the coast and Dragonspine began to appear.
“Then fill in the big shapes next…,” Albedo said, and was about to do just that when he snapped out of it, “…ah, sorry.”
He handed the brush back.
“Haha, don’t worry,” Kaeya smiled at him. “I appreciate the help. I think I have some ideas now.”
The alchemist nodded and returned to his own spot. Kaeya began to fill in the general shapes of the land before him. The first few strokes were tentative, almost cautious. They appeared as random colors against a white background, its nature unclear. The more paint he added to the canvas, the more emboldened he became, until the brush seemed to flow naturally. After that, it didn’t take long for the picture to start to form.
Kaeya felt relaxed. There was something so calming about painting, something almost mindless about it. He was so transfixed that he didn’t notice Albedo had moved to watch him until the alchemist spoke.
“You’re full of surprises,” Albedo said, causing Kaeya to jolt and nearly swipe paint across his canvas. “It’s turning out quite nicely.”
The painting really did look surprisingly like the landscape before them. Kaeya had started filling in the details, starting with the darker details and slowly working his way to light. He fought the need to fidget at the praise.
“Thanks,” Kaeya said sheepishly. “I used to paint a bit when I was younger.”
“I figured,” Albedo nodded. He seemed to observe the painting for a moment. “Your style is reminiscent of Crepus Ragnvindr’s.”
Kaeya froze.
“You have a lot of his paintings in your house,” Albedo continued. “In both your living room and guest room.”
It was at that point that the alchemist noticed Kaeya’s distress. The knight had a death grip on his brush, for a moment Albedo wondered if he might break it.
Albedo sat back down at his canvas and returned to his own painting. A few moments later he added, “I won’t pry, but if you want to talk about it, we have plenty of time.”
On any normal day, and with any normal person, they would have to pry that information from him. Even then, he would hold on tightly. But not today, and not with Albedo. Kaeya was hit with an overwhelming need, a desire, to explain everything.
A silence stretched out, only filled by the rustling of grass in the wind and brush on canvas. Kaeya dabbed his brush in the paints, beginning to put detail to the trees.
“Master Crepus was my father,” the words slipped out with alarming ease, almost shocking him. Out of his periphery, he saw Albedo pause. “Adoptive father.”
Kaeya was grateful when Albedo simply acknowledged the information with a nod and continued painting.
“He was a busy man, but he always enjoyed painting,” he continued, trying to ignore the tightness in his throat. “He painted all kinds of things, but he preferred landscapes. Sometimes, he would bring Diluc and me out with him when he did.”
“Diluc liked to practice with his sword most of the time. Sometimes I joined him. Or we’d go climb trees, chase birds. Dumb kid things,” Kaeya gave a little laugh. “And sometimes, Father would have us paint with him.”
He let out a shaky breath, “Then, we’d put them all up on the wall in his office.”
It had been a long time since Kaeya talked about his past with anyone. He realized that pretty much everyone he was close to already knew, even if some of the specifics weren’t clear. But Albedo didn’t.
The alchemist was essentially a clean slate. His presence was refreshing, eyes unclouded by prior knowledge. Albedo was possibly the only person that Kaeya could look at and not be reminded of the past.
“Father was a good man,” Kaeya nearly whispered. “He took me in without complaint, a mystery child who showed up on his doorstep during a thunderstorm. He raised me like I was his own. He loved me, and I…”
Everything looked blurry, the colors before him melting and blending into each other. Kaeya felt a hand come over his own and he turned towards its owner. Albedo looked so warm despite how cold his hand was. Warm and inviting.
Thorny vines had a death grip on his heart, and now they crept up his throat. He knew the next words would cause something inside of him to shatter, but Kaeya needed to say it.
“I watched him die.”
Then he was pulled into a hug. Even with recent events in mind, it was still a rare thing for Albedo to initiate physical intimacy. Kaeya must’ve looked like a mess.
Tears flooded over and the already blurry world became simple blobs of color, like a painting made by a child.
They stayed embraced for a long time. Kaeya simply let the tears fall silently. When was the last time he’d cried over Crepus’ death? He couldn’t recall. In fact, he wasn’t sure he could recall the last time he cried over anything. He’d been under the impression that his tears had completely dried up sometime after Diluc left.
Eventually his breathing evened out. His eyes were still glassy, but not actively tearing. Albedo pulled back when he sensed that Kaeya had calmed and wiped away the stray tears that hadn't quite dried. The alchemist leaned in and placed a kiss just above his visible eye, butterfly light.
Kaeya let out a long sigh and leaned his forehead on Albedo’s shoulder, “Thank you.”
“I’m not sure why you’re thanking me, I didn’t do anything.”
A smile cracked on his face, “You’re here with me.”
“I am.”
When they finally separated to continue their artwork, Kaeya felt like all the bones in his body had melted. High emotions were incredibly exhausting, and yet he felt lighter. There was one less thing haunting him now.
They called it quits when the sun began to dip low enough to cast the sky in gold. Kaeya watched Albedo wrap his canvas, and realized that he never figured out what the alchemist had decided to paint. When he asked, Albedo had only told him that it was unfinished.
Albedo was holed up inside his lab for a few days following their outing. Kaeya hardly spotted him during that time, much to his disappointment. He only knew the alchemist hadn’t collapsed when he found the door to the laboratory open and lacking the ‘do not disturb: experiment in progress’ sign that Klee had made.
Kaeya peeked his head inside to find that no one was there. Instead, he spotted a canvas set up on the far side of the room. He looked up and down the hallway, checking to see if anyone was coming. He snuck inside.
When he got close enough to see what had been painted, he felt his heart squeeze.
On a vibrant, grassy slope covered in cecilias sat Kaeya. He was smiling with an expression so soft that it was almost foreign. He looked happy .
Paint what you see, or paint what you don’t see.
Was this how Albedo saw him? Or was this how Albedo hoped to see him one day?
Kaeya wondered what was going on in the alchemist's mind when he painted it. He wondered what Albedo had thought about the things he had said that day. He stood there for a long time, taking in every little detail hoping that it could somehow tell him.
Watching from just outside the door, Albedo smiled to himself.