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“Oh, no, it snowed,” Sirius said, looking out of his flat’s window, inwardly feeling gleeful while outwardly putting on a face pretending he was actually upset. “I can’t go now.”
The end result—Lily Evans smacked him on the back of the head, which made him turn to look at her, eyes wide, his mouth dropping at the sight of anger on her face, confused by the tears in her eyes.
“Oh, come on,” he said. “I don’t want to see the brat.”
And that resulted in a slap across the face and Lily storming off to the kitchen, fuming. James lifted an eyebrow at Sirius, folding his arms. “Oh, come on. You get a message from Lily that you should go and see your brother, that it is important that you go to where he is, and this is the crap you pulled?”
“Why? Why is it she’s the one getting a message from my twat of not-my-brother?” Sirius said.
“You know,” James said. “I’ve always been jealous that you actually got to have a sibling.”
“Hey, don’t pull that one on me,” Sirius pointed his finger at James. “You know I’ve good reason to hate my family, but rumor has it the brat joined up now that he’s seventeen and can’t be traced. I want nothing to do with that.” An owl tapping at the window as the snow continued to fall made Sirius go over and open it, regretting it the moment he saw the owl carrying a Howler. He took a deep breath. “Her.”
“Your mother?” James asked, curious and stepping over.
“She is not my mother!” Sirius snapped. “But, might as well get this over with.” He opened the Howler, bracing himself.
“SIRIUS ORION BLACK! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, YOU NASTY, FILTHY BLOOD TRAITOR!” the Howler screamed in Walburga Black’s voice, making Sirius roll his eyes while he wondered what was his fault this time. “YOUR BROTHER IS DEAD BECAUSE OF YOU!”
“What?” Sirius was startled and confused, knowing Lily had gotten a message to go and see his not-my-brother that he didn’t want to see.
“YOUR FATHER SAW IT ON THE TAPESTRY THIS MORNING AND KEELED OVER! WHICH MEANS HIS BEING TAKEN TO ST. MUNGO’S IS ALSO YOUR BLOODY FAULT AS WELL AS US NOT HAVING A BODY TO BURY, YOU HORRIBLE BANE OF MY BLOOD! I WISH I’D NEVER GIVEN BIRTH TO YOU. YOU FOUL GOOD FOR NOTHING! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, AND DON’T FORGET IT!”
The Howler turned to ash while Sirius stared at James, confused. James was equally confused. He turned, calling into the kitchen. “Lily!”
“What!” Lily snapped, scarf wrapped around her neck.
“Sirius just got a letter saying his brother is dead. Are you sure it’s not a trap, the message you sent?”
Lily frowned. “He’s dead?”
“That’s what the Howler said,” Sirius said. “They saw it on the family tapestry, so it must be true.”
Lily punched him hard. “And this is why we should have left when I said, rather than you hanging around until it started snowing to try and use that as an excuse for not going! I mean, you ’re a bloody Wizard, Sirius, so why is it that stopping you! You could have had the chance to say goodbye.” She wrapped the scarf tighter, trying to hold back her tears. “Well, I’m not going to leave him there.”
“Lily,” Sirius tilted his head.
“Don’t Lily me,” she said. “You’re supposed to be his brother.”
“He’s a bloody Death Eater.”
“I know he’s a bloody Death Eater, you moron! He showed me the mark while we were still at Hogwarts!” Lily said. “And I’m still going!”
“Wait,” Sirius said. “Regulus didn’t turn seventeen until this summer. Why would he have the mark when he’s still under the trace?”
“How should I bloody know!” Lily said. “I don’t know what Voldemort was thinking, marking a sixteen-year-old boy, but then….” She took a deep breath. “Regulus was smart, brilliant even.”
“And what’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means I’m going whether the two of you come or not!” Lily said. The door slammed.
James sighed. “You do realize that she didn’t tell us where Regulus was before he died? That we have to go with her, right? ”
Sirius let out a deep sigh. “Fine. But not without me saying I bloody hate this.”
…
“I’m confused,” Sirius said. “Why are we taking Muggle transportation?”
“St. Paroisse is a Muggle town,” Lily said, looking out the window. “I do hope the snow doesn’t prevent us from getting there. I told the lady we’d be there to see Regulus….” Her eyes closed, and a hand reached up to wipe away a tear. When she opened them, she glared right at Sirius. “How could you do that to such a sweet kid, Sirius?”
“Sweet? Regulus?” Sirius shook his head.
“We’re getting close to St. Paroisse now,” the bus driver said.
“And the clinic?” Lily asked.
“Don’t know. Ask some of the locals. They may very likely know.”
“Clinic?” Sirius asked.
“The Muggle clinic,” Lily said, low so the bus driver couldn’t hear her.
“You’re kidding, right?” Sirius said. “This has to be a trap. I mean, what would Regulus be doing at a Muggle clinic.”
“How should I know,” Lily snapped. “But I do know….” There came a pause as she bit her lip.
“What?”
“She contacted me as next of kin, Sirius.”
“But you’re not blood-related to the git,” Sirius said his throat tightening. And there was no denying the feeling of jealousy that arose.
“She knew. She admitted she knew we weren’t blood-related, Sirius, but Regulus insisted I was his family. His sister,” Lily said, her tone of voice sharp.
“Why? Why would he do that?”
“Perhaps because his actual brother wanted nothing to do with him?” James suggested.
“But she’s Muggleborn!”
“Oh, thanks,” Lily looked out the window, getting up as the bus stopped and the bus driver said they’d arrived in St. Paroisse. In the back of Sirius’ mind, he tried going over the French that he remembered to figure out what the name of the small English village meant,
“I mean, I don’t understand why he’d turn to you. He’s a Purebloodist, Lily,” Sirius said.
“And you have a definite idea of what that means,” Lily snapped before disappearing, going to talk to a complete stranger, who pointed in a specific direction. When Sirius and James got off the bus, she barked an order out. “This way.”
And she was off, leading them down the road, making a turn, and they were there. She headed for the clinic and—
“Sorry, but the clinic is closed for the day,” the woman said.
“Lily. Lily Evans.”
“Oh. Our little rabbit’s sister,” the woman said. “And who are these two?”
“James is my fiance, and…” Lily paused, frowning. “Sirius. He’s Regulus’ actual brother.”
Sirius watched the woman tense, glaring at him for some reason he didn ’t understand. “Oh. Yes, well, based on what Olivia told us about our little rabbit’s family, I don’t see why I should trust you.”
“Our family?” Sirius said. “They’re not….”
“Sirius ran away from home at sixteen,” James said. “He and Regulus. They’ve not been on speaking terms, but….” He looked at Sirius. “I guess Regulus didn’t think Sirius would want anything to do with him since he’s still with the family?”
“Not if we can help it,” the woman said.
Which was a confusing thing to say. Sirius frowned. “Wait. Isn’t he dead?”
The woman ’s eyes widened. “Now, why would you think that?”
“Because…” He didn’t know how to explain that to a Muggle, and the three looked at each other. He swallowed.
The woman ’s eyes blinked. “Oh. Of course. You must be like him?”
“Like him?” Lily asked.
“Yes, well,” the woman frowned. “The clinics closed because we’re trying to prevent the rest of the village from finding out.”
“Finding out what?” Sirius asked, his confusion growing.
“How our little rabbit came to be at our place last night,” the woman said. “He didn’t exactly appear on our doorstep, as we plan on telling people.”
Sirius sucked on his breath. “Wait. What did Regulus do? ”
“What do you mean? What did he do?”
“Um,” James cleared his throat. “I’m guessing the way Regulus showed up last night? It wasn’t what you’d call normal?”
“No. Crash landing on our coffee table bleeding all over the place is far from normal,” the woman said.
Sirius closed his eyes. “Did he say anything about how he’s not supposed to do that in front of people who aren ’t able to—um, do the things we’re able to do?”
“My dear. Our little rabbit isn’t able to say much of anything, really. He’s still, in all honesty, in a rather touch-and-go place, but he is responsive.”
“Our little rabbit,” Sirius frowned.
“Oh. That’s Olivia’s nickname for him. Something to do with his initials, but it seems to fit,” the woman said. “But why did you think he’s dead?”
“Because,” Sirius took a deep breath, shaking his head.
“Sirius got a letter blaming him for his younger brother dying. That it was on the tapestry,” Lily said. She turned to Sirius. “What is with that tapestry?”
“It records the births and deaths of everyone in the family,” Sirius said. “It had to have recorded his death, so it doesn’t make sense.”
“No,” the woman said. “I think it does.”
Sirius felt his jaw drop while James said what he was thinking. “Excuse me?”
“We almost lost him three times last night, but by that, I mean his heart stopped three times last night while on our operating table as we patched him back together the best we could,” the woman said. “Oh. And it’s Dr. Granger, although my husband is also called that.”
“I…” Sirius looked at the woman in confusion.
“Muggle equivalent to a Healer, Sirius,” Lily said. “And what she means by his heart-stopping is that Regulus died three times last night, but they resuscitated him.”
“Hold on. You can’t be brought back from death,” Sirius said.
“What are you talking about?” the doctor said. “We doctors do it all the time.”
“I guess,” Lily frowned. “Muggle medicine, Sirius. They can’t mend broken bones the same way we do. Of course, I do have to admit my knowledge of healing magic is very limited.”
“The only one I know to ask,” Sirius shook his head. “I’d rather not talk to him. I doubt Regulus would want,” he closed our eyes. “I doubt he’d want our grandfather to know he’s here at a Muggle clinic. I doubt he’d want anybody to know. Well, except perhaps Andromeda, as she’s not a part of that lot anymore. Like me. She married a Muggleborn, to clarify.”
“I don’t follow, but I know our Olivia is attached to him. She’s the one who told us our little rabbit considers Lily his sister.”
“Oh?”
“You were very kind to him at school? Of course, what he told Olivia is limited. He’s…”
“Hold on,” Sirius sucked in his breath. “Did my brother? Did he say anything about being a part of a group? A group that….”
He couldn ’t finish the sentence. She turned her head, and Dr. Granger did, frowning. “The wrong crowd, you mean?”
“I’m not sure if that’s the right way to put it,” James said.
“Really?” the woman said.
“They torture and kill Muggles, ma’am,” Sirius said.
Dr. Granger looked at him. “And do you believe your brother would do such a thing? I don’t because Olivia doesn’t.”
“Wait,” Lily sucked in her breath. “You know?”
“Limitedly, to be honest. It’s more of something Olivia discerned, that our little rabbit thought he was doing the right thing, not realizing what they were doing.”
“How could he not?” Sirius said.
“Because that’s just the way rabbit is,” Dr. Granger said. “Now, he’s this way, but please be calm around him. He can scribble words with his right hand, which I suspect isn’t the hand he normally writes with. The other…” She took a deep breath. “Well, you’ll see.”
Sirius swallowed, heading into a room that reminded him of the infirmary at Hogwarts but behind one of the screens. He let out a gasp, turning away. His eyes were closed, so he didn ’t see the person who squeezed his arm but saw Regulus lying on his stomach, his backside bandaged up all the way down, and his left arm. And then he felt the tug. “Sirius, Regulus is awake.
He turned to see Regulus was awake, slightly sweaty and agitated for some reason; he didn ’t hesitate to sit down in the chair on Regulus’ right side, smiling as he did so. “You’re actually alive, you twat.”
He saw his brother ’s face twitch slightly, his right arm lifting, hand reaching out but then freezing. Sirius frowned, then held out both hands and waited. He watched Regulus slowly reach out, still hesitant, until Sirius could take his brother’s hand into his own. He gently ran a thumb across the back of his brother’s hand, swallowing, fighting back the tears.
“Why?” Sirius asked. “Why didn’t you come to me for help, Reggie?”
He felt Regulus ’ hand tense, and then Regulus tried pulling his hand away, only he didn’t let him.
“No. Don’t. I don’t want to let go.”
There came a sigh; then Regulus looked up at a pad of paper. The next thing Sirius knew, Lily took Regulus ’ hand from Sirius and gave him the pad and pen. Lily’s number was scribbled at the top, the words “ sorry ” and “ I was wrong . ” He watched his brother slowly write the term “hate me.”
“Wait. Do you think I hate you?”
Regulus let the pen down, making a fist with his hand, and nodded with the fist at Sirius.
“I don’t, you idiot,” Sirius said. But then, he ran a hand through his hair. “But then, I did tell you that a lot growing up.”
The fist nodded again.
“I don’t hate you,” Sirius said.
The fist shook this time; then Regulus formed a hook with his fingers.
“No? As in no, and then a question mark?” Sirius asked.
Another nod of the fist.
“You can’t talk?”
“No,” Regulus said with his hand. He then pointed to the word “Sorry.” He then pointed to, “I was wrong.”
“About Voldemort?”
“Yes.”
“Reggie, why didn’t you come to me?”
“Hate me.”
“No. I don’t,” Sirius said, watching his brother bury his face into his pillow. He reached out, taking Regulus’ hand, feeling him pull away. “Okay. I get why you’d think that, but I don’t. I love you very much.” He squeezed his brother’s hand. “And I should have been there for you, but never was, was I.”
He watched Regulus move his head while keeping his face buried in the pillow.
“No?” Sirius asked. “But I wasn’t. I should have….”
Regulus pulled his hand out, turned his head, and wrote, “ stop. ”
“Stop what?”
“Blame,” then, “my fault.”
“Reggie, don’t.”
“How about we talk about this later? When Regulus can communicate better?” Lily asked.
“We should contact Dumbledore,” James said.
“No,” Sirius said, not wanting Regulus thrown into Azkaban, particularly in his condition.
“Sirius…”
And then, because he ’d not been paying attention, “ Yes. ”
“What?”
“Dumbledore.”
“No. You’ll get thrown in Azkaban.”
“Know something.”
“Regulus.”
“Important. Trust Dumbledore.” Then, “Keep Olivia safe.”
“Olivia?”
“Please.”
Sirius was startled, realizing Regulus had managed to get a word out.
Then, “Please, Siri.”
“Olivia is.”
“My daughter, his girlfriend,” Dr. Granger said, reminding Sirius that a Muggle was there.
“His what?” Sirius said.
“Yes.”
“You do realize they’d kill you?”
“Yes.”
“To clarify, I wasn’t referring to the Death Eaters there, Reg, even though that’s true.”
“O.”
And then …
“Family.”
“Yeah. She’ll kill you if she finds out.”
Regulus pointed to, “ Keep Olivia safe. ”
“We’re going to keep all of you safe,” Lily said firmly, “Right?”
“Yeah. Yeah,” Sirius said, closing his eyes. “And don’t you do something stupid like this again. Whatever stupid thing you went and did, Reg.” And he took Regulus’ hand, still not wanting to let go, breathing in deeply as the snow continued to fall outside.