Chapter Text
Don't put me in the basement,
when I want the penthouse of your heart.
- "Bejeweled", Taylor Swift -
James Potter
okay
so
bear with me
Lily Evans
If you're trying not to freak me out, you're not exacty doing a great job of it.
James Potter
yee of little faith
Lily Evans
Ye, not yee.
James Potter
really?
huh
all right
ye of little faith then
Lily Evans
I feel like - over the years - I have proven that I have plenty of faith in you. Wasn't I the one who first said you should just say "fuck it all" and do what you love?
James Potter
technically yes
but also
you always assume the worst of me and say things like "if you're trying not to freak me out"
which shows that you do not have that much faith in me after all
Lily Evans
Shouldn't you be practicing, by the way?
Don't you have a game coming up?
James Potter
a game, she says
as if it isn't going to either make or break me
Lily Evans
Hence my question: shouldn't you be practicing?
Or having tactical meetings with the manager or whatever you do on any given day as a super important football player, the hero of the nation, scorer of the last match's hattrick?
James Potter
keep listing my achievements please
it's doing things to me
wait
fuck
not like that
i meant it's doing things to my EGO which is good because i need some self-confidence for the next match
i wasn't trying to imply that you do things to me otherwise
not that you wouldn't
because objectively speaking you are beautiful of course
but we are best friends
so
yeah
obviously you wouldn't do things to me like that because you are my friend and i am yours so
Lily Evans
Are you done?
James Potter
you just let me sweat on purpose right?
Lily Evans
Just a little.
James Potter
as if i don't do that enough in this desert already
Lily Evans
You complained about the air conditioning in your room for half an hour last night, talking about the arctic conditions you have to withstand.
James Potter
you do not get to throw every single conversation we have once had at me like that
think about my delicate nerves
Lily Evans
All right, Mrs Bennet.
James Potter
shut up mr bennet
Lily Evans
Was there a point to this conversation or did you just want to distract yourself from your muscle ache?
James Potter
my muscles do not ache
i am a machine evans
Lily Evans
I'm sorry for emasculating you.
James Potter
that word alone would do the job
but seeing as you asked for a point to this all
there is one
Lily Evans
Okay, let's hear it then.
James Potter
so
i know you said that you would only come over for the final and while i understand that was your way of trying to motivate me into winning every match between the start of the tournament and the end of it
Lily Evans
You figured out my masterplan then?
James Potter
i certainly did
you are the mastermind lil
but i kind of realised that it doesn't work for me
Lily Evans
My masterplan?
James Potter
exactly
which is why i bought you a ticket to qatar
you are flying tomorrow morning
first class
no expense has been spared
so what do you say?
Lily Evans
What do I say?
James!!!!!!!
I can't just fly over!
I've got my job.
James Potter
i already called mum and dad and they wholeheartedly agree that you need to come over to support me
Lily Evans
Of course they agree!
They love you and they would give you the world.
James Potter
right back at you evans
Lily Evans
I really can't just drop everything and leave.
Besides you told me you needed me to babysit your penthouse.
James Potter
evans
please
i beg you from the very bottom of my heart
come over
i swear i'll make it worth your while
Lily Evans
Worth my while?
James Potter
yeah
i'll score a goal and then i'll run up the stands to find you
shouldn't be too hard because of your hair
not to mention that you're always on my radar so i don't even have to try very hard i think
but yeah
i will score, find you, point my finger at you and everything, do some silly dance that is inevitably going to have me end up on strictly an x number of years into the future
Lily Evans
What kind of move are we thinking here?
Would it be more Mick Jagger or Elvis Presley?
James Potter
i see you
you'd like to see my hips gyrate wouldn't you?
Lily Evans
Only because it would be the absolute funniest thing ever.
James Potter
nah evans
don't put me in the basement when i want the penthouse of your heart
Lily Evans
All right, Swiftie.
I'll come over if you say: "It's me. Hi, I'm the problem, it's me!" on camera during your next interview.
James Potter
better pack your bags evans
you'll be on a plane in no time
best believe i'm still bejeweled
i wait patiently
she's gonna notice me
it's okay
we're the best of friends
Lily Evans
You better make sure you've got the moves like Jagger, Potter.
I'm not going soft on you just because you can quote all of "Midnights" to me, because you know I'm a sucker for that album.
Also: if any media outlet calls me a WAG I'm out of there.
James Potter
i'll try to keep the adoring staring to a minimum
Lily Evans
You would be so lucky to call me your wife or girlfriend.
James Potter
don't i know it evans
don't i know it