Work Text:
not again.
i can't do this again. i gave up my love. i gave up my children. i led to one of them dying, freezing to death! and this will haunt me for the rest of my days, into my grave, for eternity as i'll sit in starclan, never being able to fade away into nothingness.
i don't want to believe this is what awaits me. it is a curse. if i deny it enough times, maybe i can numb myself to truely stop believing starclan exists out there.
maybe what i did was right. maybe prophecies are meant to be interpreted? fireheart has already done so much for me, for the clan. his heart is full of energy and he has this spark. do i see what i want to see in him?
i need him to be the fire saving us all. he saved us from tigerstar, didn't he? he saved ravenpaw from death, didn't he? he is a good diplomat, he will do well as a leader, won't he?
won't he?
i may have ruined his entire life.
putting a burden onto him just because i was too fragile to do this again. i may have lived, but water did destroy the flame that i used to be. it took everything from me. i chose to hand the fire on to someone else, even so far as to choosing.. this name for him when he joined. it fits too perfectly.
are the other's seeing through my plan?
i am just tired.