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It hurt Marisa, hurt her greatly, that she had had to use a chloroform soaked handkerchief on Lyra.
Desperately, she wished for Lyra to stay with her of her free will.
But she knew Lyra never would. When she brought Lyra and Pan somewhere safer, and would need to worry about them trying to escape, then she would stop drugging Lyra. But Marisa knew that she couldn’t until then.
When Marisa had closed in on Lyra, behind that rock and had spoken softly to Lyra, she certainly hadn’t wanted to continue to drug Lyra but she’d had to.
So, she continued to drug Lyra, feeding Lyra in her sleep and occasionally changing Lyra’s clothes.
She had bathed Lyra, as well. It was selfish and greedy, but some part of her thoroughly enjoyed being able to take care of Lyra like this. She wished that Lyra would have allowed her mother to take care of her.
But she knew that Lyra would never.
Then the boy, Will, arrived.
Marisa came back through the passageways, aware that Will likely had someone watching out for her on the front of the house.
Marisa announced her presence to Will, watching as he kept his distance, keeping an eye on her. She offered him tea-not drugged tea.
Will didn’t drink it and Marisa tried not to snort at his paranoia. Then again, since he knew that she was drugging Lyra, she supposed his paranoia wasn’t entirely baseless.
Will, in all his self-righteous conviction, said that Marisa couldn’t keep drugging Lyra.
Marisa sat down and faced Will. She told him everything she could, that she hoped would sway Will’s decision.
Marisa had known that people would arrive. She’d known that the Authority would come. And some part of her had hoped that Asriel would arrive.
But Will being here? That perhaps was the most convenient of them all.
Will, with that knife?
Was perhaps the best protection Marisa and Lyra could have.
Marisa, knowing that, knew that she would have to sway Will to her side. Somehow.
She spoke deeply about the bond between children and their mothers. That mothers needed their children too. And that there would be people that would be after Lyra, to kill her.
She watched with relief and triumph, as she could see Will realizing that she was right. that Lyra was safest here with her.
And he then began to leave.
Marisa tried to get him to stay. If he left, he would be leaving Lyra to die.
She watched as Will’s steps slowed down, at that.
So, Marisa pressed her small advantage. She asked, “What has Asriel done for you? What has his army done for you? Who is most important to you in this world-in any world, besides your mother? What do you care for Asriel’s supposed noble pursuit?”
That got Will to stop walking. He stopped right in the doorway.
Will slowly turned around and faced Marisa again.
Will thought about what Marisa said, staring at her.
He couldn’t quite believe that he had already decided that Lyra might actually be safe in Marisa’s care, but he had. Because well, wasn’t Marisa actually doing something to protect Lyra? Which was more than what a lot of people were doing.
And now this? He couldn’t quite believe he was listening to Marisa’s persuasions again.
Because, well, as much as Will tried to tell himself that he would join the noble cause that the witches and the angels both had tried to pull him and Lyra into. And he was sure that Lyra probably would be onboard with it. But hearing what Marisa had to say, he couldn’t help but find himself wavering.
Because what exactly did he owe Asriel? Or the angels? Or the witches? Or anyone who wasn’t Lyra?
And if what Lyra had told him about Asriel was true, then Asriel wasn’t the type you’d want to trust.
Then again, Marisa Coulter clearly was the same.
But unlike Asriel, it appeared that Marisa, however misguided her actions, was actually trying to keep Lyra safe.
And this war that Asriel was involved in, that the angels wanted Will to get involved in, Will couldn’t find it in himself to actually want to involve himself in it or care about it.
All that mattered to him, was the promise he had made to the angels.
But was a promise worth giving Lyra up?
Will already knew the answer.
No.
Nothing was worth giving up either his mother or Lyra.
And Asriel, from what Will could tell, couldn’t care less about Lyra. And neither did the angels. The witches probably didn’t either. Him and Lyra? They were just cogs in the machine to all of these supposedly “noble rebels.”
But Marisa, screwed up as her actions were, as wrong as they were, her one priority, appeared to be Lyra.
Will’s expression must have spoken volumes, because Marisa smirked, understanding that her words had hit home.
Marisa nodded to the chair next to Lyra’s bed. “I’ve been sleeping in that chair,” she said, “There’s a bedroll that you can use that I found in the back of the house. I’ll show you where it is.”
Will nodded, but then said, “I need to go tell someone everything is fine. I’ll come right back.”
Marisa watched him suspiciously as he moved from the main room to the hall. And she heard quiet talking.
Will reached the window where the girl who couldn’t speak, was watching and he touched her shoulder.
The small blonde girl turned to Will, startled, and smiled. Will smiled back, but was worried. He didn’t know how to use sign language. So, he hoped that the girl could read his lips. He leaned down and spoke to her, making sure she could see his mouth move as he spoke.
“It’s alright now. I found my friend. And the woman’s gone. You can go home now, it’s fine. I swear. Okay?” He said, and watched as the girl’s eyes widened and she nodded.
She gave a few hand signs, and while Will didn’t understand what she was saying, since she was smiling at him, he had to assume that she was saying something nice.
She then left the house, going out the door. Will breathed out in relief, and went back to the main room, where Marisa was. He faced the still suspicious woman and said, “That girl, the one that can’t speak? She knows. Just think you should know that.”
Marisa nodded and tried not to growl. And she thought she’d been so careful about not being seen.
Will said, voice careful, “I don’t think we have time to sleep here. As I said, I thought I was going to be joining some army. The person who wants me to join Asriel’s cause, an angel? He’s outside. He’s waiting for me to join him. If we want to leave. We have to now.”
Marisa stared at Will, watching him, trying to read any lie that might be there in the youth’s eyes.
There was none.
Marisa nodded and it was only then that that damned golden monkey walked out from behind Marisa and her chair, causing Will to instinctively back away, eyeing the daemon.
The monkey climbed up onto Lyra’s bed and scooped up Pan, holding the sleeping ermine daemon in his hands.
Marisa began shoving her things into a bag and when she was done with that, she moved over to Lyra’s bed, leaned down and began lifting Lyra up in her arms.
Will half asked if the woman wanted help, but didn’t. As much as he wanted to be of help, he knew he wasn’t that muscular and was only a bit older than Lyra.
So, instead, he went about putting the fire out that had been under the tea kettle.
They might be leaving, but Will didn’t want to start a fire. It was dangerous and he didn’t know how close that little girl that had brought him here, lived.
Smothering the fire with a cloth on a table, he moved away from the now extinguished flames.
He noticed the golden monkey watching him. It was difficult to see, with the limited moonlight spilling in through the window, but he still saw the monkey watching him. Will glanced at the daemon, worried.
He didn’t think that the monkey was glaring or trying to threaten him. Just understand him. Study him.
At least, Will hoped that was all it was.
Carrying Lyra in her arms, Marisa brought the unconscious girl to where Will stood and the monkey hopped off of the bed, carrying Pan with him to where Will was.
Marisa nodded to Will. “Use the knife,” she said, “Get us out of here.”
Will sucked in a breath. Was he really doing this?
He understood to a certain extent that this was probably wrong. That if there was a war between a side that would oppress everyone else, he was under obligation to help stop it.
But what was right about leaving your loved ones to potentially die?
And all for some “greater good.” Will liked to think of himself as a good person, but he also was educated. He knew that the “greater good,” wasn’t always the type of good that was actually needed.
Often, historically, people who tried to depose others tended to simply do so, just so that they could get their hands on power, themselves.
So, Will supposed it made perfect sense that he go with Lyra and Marisa, instead of joining Asriel, the angels and their side.
Especially if it meant that it might protect Lyra more.
If this ended up being a hilariously bad idea, which Will was almost positive it would, he remembered that plant that the blonde girl had given him that had grown in her garden. The plant that woke people up from a deep sleep, and was at the moment, stuffed away in his pocket.
He would keep it in mind, should all this go sideways and Marisa turned out to try to hurt Lyra in any way.
Will reached into his pocket, pulled out the knife, and focused himself, blade slowly slicing through the air.
Gradually, a thin slice appeared midair, and Will opened it up.
The landscape up ahead, was vast and green. And it was daytime in that world. Will scouted the area. It looked safe. With many cottages around. Hopefully it would be safer there for Lyra, than here.
Then again, who was Will kidding? Anywhere would be safer than this world. Or almost anywhere.
Looking back at Marisa, he said to her, “I’ll take the front. If anyone attacks, I’ll try to protect us.”
He meant his words. More strongly than he had meant any promise to some angels who he barely knew.
At Marisa’s nod, he sliced wider and opened the pocket up more, stepping through, armed with the knife.
The monkey followed after him, carrying Pan. Then Marisa came through, carrying Lyra. As soon as both woman and girl were through, Will turned to the opening in midair and reached out, closing the slice up, closing this opening between Lyra and Marisa’s world and this new one.
Will turned his back to Marisa as he searched the area. “What now?” He asked her.
“Now,” Marisa said, and Will turned to her, watching as she leaned down and kissed Lyra’s forehead, “We find a place for us to stay. And we get some sleep.”
Will would have responded, but he couldn’t help but watch Marisa and Lyra. Was this really the woman that Lyra had told him cut children’s souls from them? The same woman that was a monster?
He knew that people could be complicated, but it was difficult for him to imagine that this was the same person that Lyra had described to him.
Marisa then began walking, holding Lyra, and the monkey, holding Pan, followed her.
Sighing, Will followed, and started walking alongside Marisa.
He kept his eyes peeled, holding the knife close, making sure that there weren’t any threats nearby.
As they walked, Marisa and her monkey conversed. The monkey asked Marisa mockingly, ‘and what will happen when Will proves that he can keep the girl safe? What happens after we finally let her stay awake? Will you give the girl to this boy, as a gift for protecting her?’
Marisa fought the urge to kick the monkey. Between Will being with them and the monkey holding Pan, she was able to stop herself.
She ignored what her daemon said.
Marisa had far from not contemplated what exactly Lyra and this boy’s relationship was. Whatever it was? Even if Lyra chose to be with Will, Marisa would have to decide whether or not Will was right for Lyra. Well, never mind. That was getting ahead of everything. Right now, they would need to get somewhere safe.
She was glad at least, that Will had joined them and that he had the knife. As long as he had the knife, he was of use to them.
Will, who kept walking, couldn’t believe that he was doing this, but he had conviction. He would protect Lyra, no matter what. And hopefully get back to his mother.
This way? He would have far more of a chance of keeping Lyra safe and getting back to his mother, than he ever likely would have with Asriel or the angels’ army.
There was a thought in the back of his mind that said, (You know, Lyra's going to kill you for this, right?)
But Will dismissed it. She probably would. But he had the alethiometer. Lyra could use it soon, as soon it was time for her to stay awake. She could see for herself, if he had done it just to protect her or not.
Besides, even if she hated him for this? He knew he'd do it again, for her safety.