Chapter Text
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Someone once told me that if you truly love someone you’d do anything for them
I didn’t believe them at the time
But even then I couldn’t deny it
From the moment I first met you I felt something
Love
Hatred
Fascination
If I’m being honest with you I don’t even know
But whatever it was it spread
Everytime I caught your eye
Everytime I heard the band you like
Everytime I smelled even the smallest hint of strawberries
My thoughts always ended up back to you
I made up excuses
I’m too sick for school
Classical music is better for the mind
Watermelon is the best smell
Drowning in these lies I thought it’d pass
But it didn’t
You wouldn’t leave my mind
My friends were worried
You aren’t acting the same
This isn’t like you
Why do you hate him
Why do you hate him
I couldn’t hate you
Not even if I tried
But they were right
I was changing
You didn’t care
Not at first
Slowly
Ever so slowly
My thoughts took over
I knew you didn’t like me
You called me King
Not your king
A king
A tyrant
I hated it
But it was the closest we’d gotten
So I let you
I swallowed my suffering
King was my title
Ruling was my job
It was my own game of sorts
Hide who I really was
Be who you think I am
No one saw how it was destroying me
I wanted to hold you
But I had to push you
Because that’s what you did to me
Some days I wanted the feeling to end
It was killing me
You couldn’t see my pain
You didn’t care about my pain
You didn’t care about my feelings
You didn’t care about my love
So here I am
Writing this letter
Crying
Suffering
Praying that you’ll see me for who I am
I fear for the day you see what I’ve done
My emotions
My letters
My love
But as time goes on I hope you find someone you love
Someone who you’ll do anything for
I realize now that I do believe in it
Cause I will do anything for you
Even if it means disappearing
Just for you to be happy
This is where our story comes to an end
Of the King who loved the moon
But the moon worshipped the stars
And when the stars loved the sun
The moon struck the King down
Not killing the King’s love
But knocking the final piece free from the King’s mind
A planet will never be able to love a person
Farewell my moon
I wish you find someone who isn’t hundreds of thousands of miles below you
Someone who can match you
Because I’m clearly not the one
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I heard from the sun you were looking for me
Chasing him around the sky for clues
The stars watched
Telling me how you were
Do you care now?
Is this an act?
Are you playing with me?
Again?
I still love you
You see me a tyrant
But now
I’m not there to rule
The King is gone
But the kingdom lived on
It’s been two weeks since I last saw you
Handing you the letter
Crying under the night sky
As I’m writing this my phone is buzzing
Your name is flashing up
Click
It hit voicemail
Where the hell are you
Skipping school isn’t helping your grades
You’re already dumb enough
It stings me
Even after the letter you hate me
I love you
But clearly
It’s not shown back
I want to see you
To tell you all of this in person
Give you a light kiss
Before I’m shipped off
Someone knows all my secrets
And tried to warn you
Of the danger you put me in
But still
My father found out my secrets
He told me
No son of mine will love that type
For they are a man
And it is not allowed
He found a center
I’m being sent there
I don’t want to go
I don’t want to leave you
But I’m going next week
Will you visit me?
Can you face me after these letters?
The quote still rings in my head
I’ve done everything for you
Because of my love
My only kin thinks I’m mental now
Am I?
I yearn to answer your calls
But I’m afraid
Of what you’ll think
Of what I’ll say
Of what else my father will do to me
Maybe he was right
Loving a man is foolish
It can never be returned
All that will happen is pain
When you get this letter
Tell yourself to forget about me
I’m sorry for how this turned out
Really I am
The stars will guide you again
As the King lays his head down to rest
But in my final moments of joy
I’m happy I spent them with you