Chapter Text
It would be fine. Kathrine would be fine. At least that’s what she told herself while standing at King’s Cross Station, Platform 9, and looking at the wall that would bring her to Platform 9¾. It had been fine before, actually all four years that she had already completed had been completely uneventful for the most part and pretty enjoyable all around (apart from the last few weeks of last year), but somehow this year felt like it wouldn’t end well, and it hadn’t even started yet. Kathrine watched a few families with kids cross the wall, among them some fellow students she knew by face, but no-one with which she was really acquainted. She thought about waiting for another few minutes but a quick glance to the clock looming a little bit to the right above her head told her that she was running out of time. With a small sigh she gave her cart a push and made her way towards the wall, exhilarating her speed the closer she got, she crossed and suddenly found herself amid a dense crowd. Over their heads she could vaguely make out the train to Hogwarts and the sign that labelled this as Platform 9¾.
The people around her pushed towards the end of the train where a train conductor stood and ushered students to quickly hand over their luggage before entering the train. Kathrine followed the direction of the people around her, all the while looking out for familiar faces in the crowd without any luck, till it was her turn to give up her big trunk. She took it off the cart and put it with the rest of the luggage, keeping her smaller duffle bag and Persephone’s carrier to take with her onto the train. When she finally made it on, she realized her mistake with hesitating outside for so long. The train was crowded, most cabins already filled to the brim, with just a few seats remaining amongst students she didn’t know. Letting out another sigh she pushed through the people standing in the corridor, looking out for a space or two for Persephone and her to sit down on, but it seemed like a futile endeavour. She was coming close to the end of the third carriage when she saw them. Stephanie, Eleanor, Daphne, Chloe and Helen, huddled together in their usual cabin, giggling and talking amongst each other. Kathrine pushed open the door and gave them a friendly smile. “Hi guys, there you are! I was looking for you outside, but it seems like we missed each other.” They had seized their conversation the moment she walked in and looked up to her standing in the doorway with a look she knew just too well at this point. Each one of them gave her that slight friendly but pitying smile, putting just enough sadness into it to make it look genuine.
She swallowed down the knot that suddenly formed in her throat. Helen was the first to speak up, giving the others a side-eye glance before starting with a tone too friendly to feel genuine in this more than awkward atmosphere. “Hi Kathrine, long time no see! Ya, it seems like we missed each other, we thought you were already inside, so we didn’t wait up. I was actually surprised you weren’t in here already, uhm…” She threw another glance to the side, to Stephanie specifically this time who looked like she had just been waiting for her queue to chime in. “Yes, actually since we thought you were already inside and found yourself another place, we promised the last seat to Abigail, I hope you don’t mind.” Her apologetic gaze did nothing to soothe the anger welling up in Kathrines stomach. Pushing it down as best as she could she let out a small breath to steady herself before thinking about how to respond. She didn’t mind that they had given Abigail a space in the group, Abigail was a perfectly nice and chipper Hufflepuff Kathrine had gotten along with pretty well so far, but what she did mind was the fact that she didn’t occupy a new space of her own in the group but had instead completely replaced her. In a cabin for 6 people 7 was a crowd, and it was clear who that 7th wheel was.
With impeccable timing Abgail showed up behind Kathrine right at that moment, her sweet smile almost making her angrier. “Oh, hi Kathrine, I hope you had a nice summer!” she said with a more genuine and friendly tone than all of Kathrines so-called friends combined, which immediately made her feel bad for being angry at the Hufflepuff. It wasn’t Abigails fault Kathrine had become an outcast among her own friends. She decided to admit defeat and count her losses, gave Abigail the nicest smile she could muster among these circumstances and answered: “For sure, had a lot of free time to catch up on some of the reading I didn’t have time for last year. I hope you had a nice summer as well.” While speaking she slowly made way for Abigail so she could step into the cabin. She quietly thanked Kathrine and took her seat like it had been hers for the last four years. The Kathrine awkwardly waved goodbye, not trusting her voice enough to bring out another word, before quickly continuing down the corridor. She got halfway through the next carriage when she went by the Marauders’ cabin. The group of Gryffindors was fairly well known amongst the students of their year, and even more popular with the younger students who looked up to them and revered their stories of mischief and adventures as if they were legends of old, which often lead to the Marauders being revered like heroes or living legends.
Kathrine didn’t have much of an opinion on them nor did she care much what they did, besides her admiration for James’ skills as the Gryffindor seeker. Funnily enough though most of the girls she knew or were friends with had had at least a small crush on one of the boys at some point in time, with James and Sirius being the most popular. Stephanie especially had had it bad for Sirius last year, almost constantly telling her about the latest endeavour the Marauders had been part of or the newest gossip surrounding them. Back then Kathrine didn’t have the heart to tell her best friend about the definite attraction she picked up on between Sirius and Remus, but she hadn’t held back as much when things had come to a head at the end of last year. Kathrine screaming at Stephanie that her favourite bad boy probably already had a boyfriend wasn’t something she was especially proud of, but now that she walked by their cabin and saw Remus’ head resting comfortably on Sirius’ shoulder while the latter was deep in conversation with James across from him, she couldn’t help but feel like it had been justified. She was about to continue onward, not sparing the group another look, when she noticed an unexpected face among them. To the left, next to James who had taken up the window seat, sat Lily Evans. Kathrine only knew her fleetingly but from the few sentences they had exchanged Lily had seemed pretty sweet and friendly. She was smart and the girls had a few similar interests, so naturally they had met in the library a handful of times. Seeing her with the marauders of all people surprised Kathrine to say the least, since she never had had the impression before that the boys and her knew each other very well, let alone were friends. At least it hadn’t been among the gossip she had picked up from her friends, she was pretty sure. Besides being in the same house, Kathrine couldn’t find many similarities between them from what sparce knowledge she had. After a moment of contemplation, she simply shrugged and discarded the mildly interesting observation, not particularly interested in finding out more. She passed the cabin with quick steps, her quest of finding a seat becoming increasingly urgent as the train would leave the station any minute now.
By this point most people had disappeared into cabins, making it possible for Kathrine to move quickly and without much shoving despite the bag and carrier she had with her, but it also made her goal more difficult since most seats were being filled. She was about to give up, not even wanting to check the last two carriages, when she came to the very last cabin of the carriage she was in and found it curiously empty. Not entirely empty, though the fact that it only had a single person inside felt almost just as unlikely to her. It wasn’t someone she knew or was acquainted with, but she had seen the boy’s face before in the hallways and in class, so Kathrine knew he was in the same year as her and only felt slightly shy and awkward knocking and carefully pushing open the door. “Excuse me,” she began, “is it alright with you if I occupy a seat or two in here?” The boy looked up from the book he had been obviously deeply engrossed in, giving the newcomer a surprised and slightly warry look. She watched him slowly scanning her form from head to toe, probably taking note of her hastily braided brown hair, the slightly old-fashioned blouse and baggy jeans she was sporting, his gaze wandering over the worn-out duffle bag that looked like it could give up any moment and spill all it’s contents over the floor of the train, to the pet carrier in her left hand that was covered with a grey blanket to give Persephone more privacy, all the way down to her simple brown boots. When he was done with his assessment, he seemingly classified her as not much of a threat to his peace because he gave a slight nod of approval. Kathrine let out a relieved sigh, put the carrier down in the seat closest to the door, put her bag up into the overhead storage and closed the door behind her before sinking into the middle seat on the left side.
Persephone had apparently registered that they had finally reached their destination for the time being and started to call attention to herself with slightly muffled but insistent meows. Kathrine threw a quick look to the boy in the window seat across from her and said with a slightly apologetic tone: “I hope it’s alright with you if I let her out? She’s been cooped up inside there for quite a while now.” He didn’t even really acknowledge her, but she took the slight tilt of his head as agreement before taking the blanket off the carrier and opening the door. Almost immediately Persephone in all her blue-grey beauty came bouncing out, leaping on her owner’s lap and purring contently before continuing to explore the rest of the small space. Kathrine got out her own book and paid the cat no more mind, happy to have found a peaceful cabin amongst all the chaos in the rest of the train. She had sat down just in time for the train to start its journey, slowly rolling out of the station. Neither Kathrine nor the boy seemed to have someone to wave goodbye to, so they just sat in tranquil silence, both engrossed in their literature, respectively. They stayed like that for a while, each minding their own business, and she had just begun a new chapter in her book when a quiet voice caught her attention.
“Excuse me, “the boy said, with a voice a little deeper than she’d have expected from his rather scrawny appearance, “but what is her name?” He pointed to Persephone who, unbeknownst to Kathrine, had found her place on his lap, rolled up and purring happily with closed eyes. Kathrines eyes widened a little surprised upon seeing her cat this content with a stranger. Normally it took her a little while to warm up to new people, and even then, she was rather wary around most people, only really nice to a select few. “Her name is Persephone.” She answered with a kind smile, “and she seems to really like you. She normally isn’t that cuddly with strangers.” Her words seemed to satisfy him, and Kathrine could swear that she even saw the ghost of a smile play around his lips when he looked down on the cat in his lap, carefully and a little hesitantly starting to stroke her, maybe a little scared of startling her. She decided to take the initiative and introduce herself as well, mentally preparing herself and repeatedly reminding her brain that the worst he could do was ignore her or be snarky about it, two options she thought she could live with.
“My name is Kathrine.” she said a little timid. She didn’t quite understand where her sudden nervousness came from. He seemed slightly surprised for all of two seconds, raising one of his eyebrows, but it was gone again so quick that she almost thought she had imagined it. He took a moment before answering her with a short and slightly gruff: “Severus Snape.” She nodded in understanding. “You are a Slytherin, right? I believe we had herbology together last year.” He nodded in agreement but didn’t give her any more as an answer, and she couldn’t help but to start feeling a little discouraged. Her thoughts drifted to the countless hours she had spent effortlessly chatting and having fun with her friends, and how they most likely were doing just that right now, but this time without her present. Severus must have seen her face fall a little because he cleared his voice a little before starting another sentence, his voice a little unsure. “Uh, you are a Ravenclaw, correct? You play keeper in their Quidditch team if I’m not mistaken.” Suddenly a little happier, Kathrine gave him a bright smile. “I am! I didn’t know you’re interested in Quidditch; I don’t think I’ve ever seen you around the field.”
Severus contemplated how to answer her for a second before simply sighing. “I’m not really interested in it, but I’m friends and roommates with the Quidditch captain of the Slytherin team. I’ve been to one or two games, usually when he drags me with him.” Kathrine was almost stunned by the fact she had gotten more than a short sentence out of him and continued to smile happily. “Oh, you mean Lucius? Ya, he’s pretty good! Gave our team a run for their money last year. But nothing beats playing against the Gryffindors, with Potter being such a good seeker and all.” She meant it as a simple comment and hadn’t paid it much mind, but the second she mentioned Potters name she saw the boys face fall suddenly. He drew his eyebrows together, scowling at her with a look bordering hateful, filled with so much rage she almost wanted to run the moment she saw it. Through gritted teeth he hissed “Oh, so you’re a Potter fan, huh?” And Kathrine couldn’t do much more than hastily shake her head for a moment before coming back to her senses. “No, I think you misunderstood me! I uhm… don’t really have an opinion on him? A lot of my friends like him though and I see him from time to time because of Quidditch, that’s all.” She wasn’t really sure why she was justifying herself towards this boy she had just met not even an hour ago, but it seemed enough to soften his rage and make him turn his gaze from her back to Persephone, still gently stroking the small creature. “Potter doesn’t deserve to have fans, he’s a bellend.” He murmured, still visibly agitated. Kathrine was unsure what to do for a moment before settling on trying to be sympathetic. “I’m sorry if I made you angry, I wasn’t aware you didn’t like Potter and his friends. Let’s talk about something else maybe, if you’d like?” She tried to give him a reassuring smile, but he didn’t give her a second glance. “I’d prefer to read.” He simply said, his tone now cold and distant. Feeling discouraged she took a moment to contemplate if it was worth pushing further and finally settled on leaving him alone.
They read in complete silence, only the sounds of the train being audible, till they almost reached the school. Kathrine excused herself to change into her uniform and Severus did the same, the two of them not exchanging more than a handful of words, and Kathrine felt increasingly more deflated by the lack of interaction. Maybe a small part of her had hoped that this was the start of her making new friends, of her proving that she didn’t need those girls she had spent most of the last 4 years with, but her first attempt at making a new friend had failed completely and horribly. Even if her and the Slytherin seemed like a rather ill-fitted pair of friends, having not much in common and failing even at a simple conversation, she had had a moment of hope that maybe this was exactly what she had needed. When they arrived the two of them left the train together, heading in the same direction, and eventually shared a carriage up to the castle all in complete silence. At this point she had almost completely suppressing the uncomfortable thought of the cold and awkward atmosphere that had settled between them, choosing to ignore it and instead focusing on the thestrals pulling their carriage. Kathrine had liked the scary looking creatures ever since she had first seen them in her second year at Hogwarts. Back then she had wondered why she was seemingly the only one able to see the huge black creatures in front of the carriages, but after they had learned more about thestrals in care of magical creatures they had become a fast favourite for her. Their unique look and secrecy had drawn her to the horse like creatures. She was almost entranced watching them diligently pull their carriage, which is why she jumped a little when Severus suddenly decided to talk to her again.
“You can see them, can’t you.” He didn’t really say it like a question, but she nodded non the less, a soft smile on her lips. “I think you are the first person I’ve seen who can see them and smiles at them.” He continued, his tone a little incredulous. She just shrugged. “I like them. I think they are fascinating creatures. You can’t see them?” She asked, looking towards him. He simply shook his head. She turned back to the thestrals then. “I guess that makes it hard for you to understand. I believe it’s a different experience for everyone, since thestrals are so deeply entwined with something that is very traumatic for a lot of people. I understand why some people break down crying every time they see one, or get a panic attack, or can’t bear to look at them without throwing up. I guess I’m lucky that it didn’t affect me like that.”
There was a short pause in their conversation while the carriage continued to roll towards the castle, the big front doors slowly coming into view. Finally, Severus asked: “Do you want to talk about it?” Kathrine looked at him surprised and saw that he seemed a little uncomfortable himself after asking such a question. For a moment she wasn’t sure how to respond to him, to the way he obviously had tried to be a little compassionate even though it made him feel uncomfortable, and she couldn’t help but feel like it was his way of apologizing for his sudden outburst earlier. So, she decided to shake her head, give him a warm smile and a simple answer. “No. This isn’t something I talk to people about. I appreciate you asking though.” She saw how he visibly relaxed and turned away to hide her little hopeful smile. Maybe the idea that her and Severus could be friends wasn’t as far-fetched as she had originally thought.