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In Ryuji's experience, being a vampire was not as cool as it sounded on paper.
Okay, technically speaking, he wasn't a vampire, he was a dhampir, but same principle.
For one, the appetite of a teenage boy and a thirst for blood were an annoying combination, especially since his mom was only able to afford so much red meat. Plus, she needed to feed too.
That meant the scent of blood tended to make him pretty hungry. A scent he happened to be very sensitive to. Whenever anybody nearby had some kind of cut or scrape... Yeah, he could smell that. And it drove him nuts.
(The best solution, he had found, involved a lot of snacking. Good thing he was an active guy.)
However, since joining the Phantom Thieves, he had come to appreciate the utility of his heightened senses. He was often the first to know when one of his teammates was injured, and with a bit of effort he could often pinpoint where they needed healing most.
It was especially helpful when some people happened to have a habit of throwing themselves into dangerous situations with little regard for their own health and safety.
(Sure, maybe he was pot calling the kettle black there, but still!)
Case in point:
Ryuji was the first to arrive at LeBlanc that day. The Phantom Thieves were planning to continue their infiltration of Shido's Palace. They had been making steady progress through the cruise ship, collecting the letters of introduction they needed to gain access to the Treasure.
"Heya, Boss!" Ryuji greeted Sojiro in his usual manner.
"Good to see ya, kid. Ren's upstairs."
"Cool, thanks!"
Ryuji jogged up the stairs, but a strong scent made him stop in his tracks.
"Hey, Ryuji. What's up?" Ren said. He was sitting on the edge of his bed. His face didn't betray a trace of pain, but…
"Dude. One of your wounds is open."
Morgana, who was lounging next to him, jumped up on all fours, fur bristling. "What!?"
"Yeah, let me…"
Ryuji got closer. The smell of blood was overwhelming, and he had to fight the urge to sink his teeth into Ren's neck (it was always harder with Ren, for some reason), but luckily, he had a lot of practice restraining himself. Sniffing his friends had definitely been awkward at first, but they had all gotten used to it at this point.
"Right here. On your abdomen. Mind if I…"
"I got it…" Ren muttered, rolling up his hoodie and undershirt. Ryuji flinched at the sight of his friend's bruising. A dark crimson was seeping through some of his bandages.
It brought back unpleasant memories. Memories of when they first reconvened after their grand plan. How Ren struggled to stay awake, how beaten and bruised he was. Ryuji had been able to smell the drugs in his bloodstream. The artificial scent made him seriously nauseous, and he had to fight not to throw up during the whole meeting.
"Do we need to get Dr. Takemi?" Morgana asked, anxiously pacing across the floor.
"Dunno, I'll go get Boss."
According to Sojiro, it wasn’t a particularly deep wound. Ren simply needed fresh bandages and rest. After Ren was convinced to lay down (only thanks to Morgana, Sojiro, and Ryuji pressuring him at the same time), Sojiro returned to the shop. Ryuji sat down on the couch, pulling out his phone.
Ren's phone buzzed, and he raised an eyebrow.
PTs Chat
Ryuji: Infiltration canceled guys, one of Ren's injuries opened up
Ryuji: Boss said he'll be fine but shouldn't be movin around for a bit
Haru: Oh no! I hope you feel better, Ren!
Makoto: Thank you for informing us, Ryuji.
Ann: Dang, that sucks. Get better, Ren! <3
Futaba: F u_u
Yusuke: I also wish Ren a swift recovery. I suppose I'll do some people-watching in Shibuya instead.
Ren: Guys I'm fine, we don't have to cancel today's infiltration
Ren: Taking down Shido is the priority right now
Haru: We can't do that if our leader overworks himself!
Makoto: We have four of the five letters we need, and plenty of time until our deadline. We can afford to take the day off.
Makoto: Haru is right. You shouldn't overdo it, especially in your current condition.
Ren: But I'm fine in the Metaverse, remember?
Futaba: yeah, but you won't make it there if you keel over irl!
Ren: Fine, fine, you guys win…
As he kept tabs on the group chat, Ryuji dug through his backpack. He always made sure to keep it well-stocked with snacks. The scent of Ren's blood was muted now, but still present, and it was getting to him a little bit.
"You want anything?" Ryuji asked Ren.
Ren didn't say anything.
"Someone's sulking…" Morgana muttered, shaking his head.
Ryuji tossed a bag of barbecue chips towards the bed anyway. He opened up some sesame crackers for himself and started snacking.
"Geez, now I'm hungry, too. I'm gonna see if Boss has anything for me," Morgana commented, trotting downstairs.
The two boys quietly munched on their snacks. However, Ryuji could tell Ren was upset. Eventually, the silence got to him.
"Hey. You still mad about the infiltration? I guess I shoulda asked you before tellin' the others, but I knew you'd try to push yourself even though you shouldn't. You kinda have a habit."
He heard Ren take a sharp breath. It didn't seem to be due to pain, though. "It's not just the infiltration."
Ryuji walked over and sat at the foot of the bed. "You wanna tell me what it is, then?"
Ren was quiet for a moment. Ryuji could see the conflict in his face.
"C'mon, dude. You're always listenin' to our problems. Let me listen to yours," Ryuji said, "Can't promise I'll be great at it, but I'll try."
Ren sighed. "Ever since the… interrogation… I've just felt kinda… useless, I guess. I can't move around as much, I have to limit my time outside so I don't get recognized. There's so much I want to do but can't. The only time I don't feel that way is in the Metaverse. It's just so nice to have all the stiffness and pain melt away, to be able to take on Shadows like nothing ever happened. I feel like myself again."
"Ren…"
Against his better judgment, Ryuji laid on his back next to Ren. The bed was definitely not made for two, and it was a tight fit, but somehow it felt… right. Ryuji stared up at the ceiling, doing his best to ignore how warm Ren's body was or how tantalizing he smelled.
It's just the blood, he thought to himself, Just the blood…
"You know, you aren't worth less just cuz you can't do as much, right? I get how much you like to help people. But sometimes I think you let it get in the way of takin' care of yourself." Ryuji chuckled. "'Course, I think all of us have been guilty of that at some point. Guess that's why we're Phantom Thieves."
Ren let out a quiet laugh. "Geez, Ryuji, when did you get so insightful?"
Ryuji shoved him as gently as he could. "Aah, shuddup, man." He tried to ignore the blush spreading across his face.
"But seriously. We're not just your friends, we're your teammates. Just cuz your the leader doesn't mean you hafta keep it all to yourself. If anything's bothering you, you can let it out!"
Ren hummed. "Anything, huh…?
"Y-yeah, anything." Ryuji wasn't totally sure why he stammered.
"There is… one thing. That I've been trying to hide," Ren whispered, "But I'm scared of falling apart. I-I… I just can't, you know? Not with everyone depending on me."
Ryuji turned to face Ren. He took one of the boy's hands in his own. "It's okay. I got you."
Ren stared at him. His eyes were filled with several emotions. Hesitence, anxiety… But more than anything else, appreciation. With a shuddery breath, he began to speak.
"Being in police custody… It was bad. I mean, I know you saw my injuries and everything. But that only tells part of the story. Whatever they injected into me, I couldn't think straight. Could barely remember what was going on, that this was part of the plan. It was terrifying, waking up thanks to a bucket of ice-cold water, handcuffed to a metal chair. One of the officers kicked me to the floor the moment he saw me struggling. None of them gave a damn about what they did to me. In there, I wasn't the leader of the Phantom Thieves. Just… just a defenseless teenager. I-I seriously thought I might die before Akechi ever showed up."
Ren paused. "...They threatened to break my leg, if I didn't sign the confession."
Ryuji was already feeling equal parts sympathetic and angry, but that in particular made his heart ache and his blood boil. That was a pain he knew, one he wouldn't wish upon anybody. He gently rubbed Ren's hand. He could feel the boy shaking.
"Sae wasn't that bad, in hindsight, but I was still so confused and cold and scared… Everything hurt, but I knew if I screwed up something terrible would happen so I just kept going… It felt like I'd be stuck there forever. It was only when she left that I really remembered what was at stake. But even before she came back to get me, I was relieved. Because either our plan worked… Or I'd be dead. And honest to God that sounded nice at that point."
The weight of that final sentence hit Ryuji like a truck. It seemed to break Ren as well, because tears began to stream down his face. He tried to pull away from Ryuji to wipe them away, but Ryuji threw an arm around him and held him closer. Part of him was scared his friend would disappear.
"S-sorry," Ren said, choking on a sob, "I-I don't… I haven't felt like that since then. B-but… It still hurts so much. And n-not just physically. That fear still- it still haunts me! But I'm not s'posed to be afraid, I gotta look out for everyone. E-even if I have nightmares, or the thought of g-getting caught a-and a-arrested again makes it hard to b-breathe…"
Ren was openly sobbing into Ryuji's chest now. Ryuji could feel his shirt getting soaked, but that was the least of his concerns right now. Never had he seen Ren so vulnerable. He wondered when his leader had last let himself be vulnerable. He grimaced at the thought. But he kept it to himself, gently rubbing Ren's back. After a few minutes, Ren managed to catch his breath a little.
"I never used to be this afraid. I-I hate it. I just wanna be how I used to be. That's why I always want to go into the Metaverse," he muttered.
"I see," Ryuji said, "Sorry I didn't realize how much this was eatin' at you."
Ren shook his head. "Of course you didn't. I didn't want you to know. Didn't want anyone to know."
"Well, now I do. And it's okay to be afraid. 'Specially after going through that much shit. None of us would look down on ya for that."
Ryuji took a deep breath. He had never been good at compelling people. His mom said it just didn't suit the kind of person he was. But in this case, it didn't really matter if it worked. He just needed to get through to Ren. Gently, he adjusted their positions so he was looking directly into Ren's eyes.
"You are safe. I'll never let anything like that ever happen to you again. So will the rest of the team. You can depend on us. You can tell us anything."
With how red and puffy Ren's eyes were from crying, Ryuji struggled to tell if his words had any kind of magical influence behind them. For a moment they just laid there, staring into each other's eyes.
"...Has anyone ever told you your fangs are cute?" Ren said.
"W-WHAT!?" Ryuji sputtered, nearly falling off the bed, "W-where did that come from!?"
Did I break him!?!?
"You said I could tell you anything," Ren said. Ryuji could see a little bit of Joker in the small smile that had crept onto his face.
"W-well, I, uh…"
Ren snuggled in closer. "Relax, Ryuji. That's been on my mind for a while."
"For real!? Why say it now!?"
Ren shrugged. "Just wanted to break the tension, I guess. It was good to get that off my chest, but I'm kinda exhausted now."
Ryuji huffed. "Guess that's fair…"
"Do you mind if we stay like this for a bit?" Ren asked.
Despite how flustered he was, Ryuji had to admit, it did feel nice. "Yeah, 'course."
When Morgana finally returned to the attic, he found the two of them fast asleep. He sighed and shook his head, but he was smiling. He supposed he could wait until they were awake to poke fun at them.