Chapter Text
“Hey Kris,” Susie said. “Wake up.”
Kris had been sleeping through class like a goddamn zombie. Again. But the new algebra material was killing her, so she was trying to get them to get up.
“Kris.”
No response. They breathed slowly.
“Kris.” She poked them lightly. “Get the fuck up already.”
They continued sleeping, head in their arms.
“Kris, wake the fuck up or I’m going to make you get up.”
Kris mumbled something inaudible. Susie sighed, got up, walked up to their desk to face them, and shook them roughly by the shoulders.
“God fucking dammit Kris, get the fuck up already! ” she hissed.
They muttered something again. It sounded like, “But I don’t feel like getting up.”
She stopped shaking them for a moment. How the fuck do they sleep like this when everyone’s so damn loud? she wondered. She checked to see that Alphys wasn’t watching, then slapped them on the side of their head. “You fucking zombie. I need help with algebra two shit.”
“Ask Noelle,” they mumbled.
She pulled them up by their hair to look at the asshole in the eyes. “You’re closer, though. Too lazy to walk over there.”
“…She’s literally one desk over…And anyway…” they said. They pinched her cheek. “You’re close enough to me as is.”
She turned away, stuttering out a few incomprehensible syllables in flusterment.
“Sure. I can help you.”
…This is gonna take a while, isn't it?
—
“We already know how to solve an equation which is already a perfect square, right?” Kris asked, their voice already less rough.
“Okay, yeah, I get how to do that,” Susie said impatiently. “But I still don’t get how this ‘completing the square’ shit works.”
“Chill out, hot stuff. I’m getting there. Let’s say we have a quadratic we can’t factor. For example—how about number one on the worksheet? So x-squared minus four-x plus six equals three.”
A tiny part of Susie’s mind wondered how on earth someone could be so calm with her constant complaining and lack of patience. A significantly larger part of her mind was concerned with the fact that Kris had just called her “hot stuff.” Wasn’t that flirting? Her best friend? Flirting with her? Were they insane? Was she insane?
“…Susie? Hello? Are you okay?” Kris was waving a hand in front of her face. She jumped. “What’s wrong, pretty girl? You’re looking a bit red there.”
She was blushing again, and she hated it.
“Kris…” she whined.
“What is it, dear?” Kris asked innocently.
“STOP FLIRTING WITH ME AND JUST TELL ME HOW TO DO THE DAMN PROBLEM!”
Everyone in the room turned at that. Then to each other. Back to them. Susie opened her mouth to say something.
“But it’s so adorable seeing you like this.”
Susie dropped her face into her arms on the desk. She missed and smashed her face into the wood, letting out a weak groan. It hid her red face, though, so the pain didn’t matter.
Their classmates were whispering now.
“Are those two together?”
“Probably not…”
“Dude, Snowy, what are you talking about? They disappear into the storage closet every day!”
“They do?”
“You haven’t noticed?”
“Yeah, but to do what?”
“Isn’t it obvious?”
“Yes, to cuddle—“
Susie groaned again.
“C—class?”
“—or to make out—“
She died inside a little more.
“Class…”
“—or to have—“
“CLASS!”
Silence.
Nobody had ever heard Ms. Alphys yell like that before.
“Um…c—can we get back to work n—now?”
People started talking again. There was a general shift in conversation back to homework.
“Come on, Sooz,” Kris said above her, ruffling her hair gently. “It’s okay to be embarrassed.”
She mumbled, “Sh—shut up,” and raised her head.
Nobody noticed Noelle clutching at her desk, on the verge of tears.
—
“This equation doesn’t look like a perfect square right now.”
“Uh-huh.”
“But we can make one side a square.”
“How the fuck—?”
“Susie, I love you, but you need to chill. Do you think you can figure it out by yourself? That’s the best way to learn.”
She was blushing again , and both of them knew it.
“N—no,” she said. “C’mon Kris, can't you just tell me?”
“I believe in you.”
Their monotone voice somewhat detracted from the value of that statement.
“Fiiiiine,” she groaned. She landed a friendly punch on their arm. “You little fucker.”
Kris just cackled to themself.
—
After much staring, fidgeting, muttered curses, and restless glances at the clock, Susie finally gave up.
“KRIS! Come on! Just tell me how to solve the goddamn problem! I don’t fucking get it!”
Kris, who had now finished their worksheet, turned to face her.
“Okay, dearest Susie. Sure.”
—
Can you take over for now? asked Kris, internally. I don’t completely understand it either.
Sure, Kris. I can help you too, their soul answered. Later, though.
Thaaaanks! You’re the best!
Their mouth spoke of its own accord. “We’ll use the first problem. Same one, right? Let’s take a look at the x-squared term and the x term. If this was a perfect square, what would the constant be?”
Well that never fails to be creepy , they joked.
Their soul chuckled. You need to get used to it at some point, Kris.
After taking a few seconds to think, Susie said, “Four.”
“That’s right. So we can subtract two from each side to make one side a perfect square and the other a constant.”
Susie’s eyes boggled. “Huh?”
“Look.” Kris’ pencil pointed at Susie’s worksheet. Their hand brushed against hers, before it started writing by itself. “We do…x-squared minus four-x…plus four…equals one. Now what can we do?”
They could feel the scales on their skin. Rough, rude, and radiating pure warmth, just like Susie herself.
“I—I—I dunno. Square root both sides?”
Kris’ brain was repeating the same thought over and over and over, like a broken program. Susie was stuttering too, and probably flushing again. Flirting was all fun and games; but this was actual physical contact . This was too much, too far, too fast for them. Both of them, they were sure.
The only thing preventing them from going absolutely scarlet or stuttering like an idiot was the soul controlling their body.
“Yes. Try now.”
Their arm moved off hers.
Oh my god, Kris. You sounded like you were screaming there.
Shut up, you.
Don’t tell me you have a crush on her.
Sh-shut up.
Did you just stutter? In your thoughts?
No reply. Their cheeks steadily warmed, though, with the soul’s receding influence.
Some minutes passed. Schoolroom chatter and the scratching of Susie’s pencil were the only thing to be heard.
“I got x equals three.”
“Wrong,” their soul said for them, taking over again. “You forgot to add the plus-minus.”
She stared at them. “Huh?”
“Here.” Kris’ finger pointed. Their arms brushed again, and Kris panicked internally. “When you took the square root.”
“Um. What?” Susie’s mind went blank with the contact. “Oh.” Another few seconds of scratching. “One and three?”
“Correct.” Their arms separated once more.
Susie paused to think for a moment. “That’s cool, but why should I use this shit and not factoring?”
“When we can’t factor with nice numbers. For example, fractions.”
“Okay…” she said slowly, nodding her head. “What about when the x-squared number thing isn’t one?”
“It’s called a coefficient. And Susie,” they said, with not so much as a trace of irritation. “How about we discuss this at home today or tomorrow at school? Your choice.” Kris took back over, and said, “W—we can get Noelle too. She’d love to help you.”
Noelle’s ears perked up at that. Their eyes met. Kris gave her a reassuring nod.
“Okay,” said Susie.
They turned back and flicked her on the snout. She blinked. Bared her teeth. “Dumbass,” Kris snarked, back to their normal self. “You need to tell me what you want to do.”
“Tomorrow. With Noelle.”
A glint of hope shone in Noelle’s eyes.
“You just wanna procrastinate.”
“Y—yeah, what the fuck else?”
Her cheeks told a different story. Kris wanted to tease her more about it, but settled on, “Sounds good to me.”