Archive of Our Own ^beta

Bright rays of sun shone over Jake as he placed the last box of his belongings into his mother’s car. Well, the last that would fit today. Stretching his limbs in relief from the straining of moving boxes to and fro all morning. He was glad most of his things for now were packed and ready. He could always come back if there was something important that suddenly slipped his mind. He figured he would have everything moved by tomorrow night.
He wasn’t bringing much with him, he wasn’t sure how much to bring. It was his first time moving out after all. That was already difficult enough to grasp.

The nerve wrecking reality that he would no longer be living in his home of 3 years set in. Jake wasn’t fond of changes. He wasn’t fond of moving from his comfy hometown back in Australia to an entirely new country, continent, where he could hardly speak the language. Having to relearn a culture from scratch and adapt to everything from weather, people, everyday life and language was hard.

Now here he was, making a new change again, turning back to his house for the last 3 years, getting ready to move away from his parents for the first time. Let alone, moving in with someone he had never even met! It would be impossible to be able to live alone in this economy, Jake certainly didn’t earn enough to fend for himself. Refusing help from his parents, he didn’t want to be known as the rich boy who got everything from them.

“I don’t need your money! My job provides enough.”

And well, that wasn’t the only reason he didn’t want to live alone. The Australian was very aware of his high anxiety of being alone, the irrational fear that something tragic may happen or a bad accident when he was by himself. With no one to support or help him. No, no, he had no tragic incident happen, because that’s what his phobia was, irrational. It was completely irrational to have a severe, anxiety-building fear that someone was going to break into his house at night, or that he may fall in a fatal way with no one to help. The panic attacks he would endure when he realised he was alone in his house. Completely irrational! Jake knew full well that there was nothing to fear, but due to the disorder he couldn’t help the anxiety. He could never seem to get over the fear.

After sessions and evaluations from his therapist on the issue, he was diagnosed with autophobia, also known as monophobia. The extreme fear of being left alone, physically or mentally. For the Aussie, it was both. It causes him to obsess over being alone and what could happen while he was alone.
Jake sighed running a hand through his dyed, honey, blonde hair as he reminded himself on what he knew about this future roommate to soothe his nerves.

He wasn’t a complete stranger, they had mutual friends and connections. He had learnt the boy was named Sunghoon. Jake’s best friend, Jay, assured him that Sunghoon was a relaxed and nice guy. Sharing a course with said male. However did also warn he was pretty icy and awkward at first. The Aussie always questioned what he meant by icy, he assumed it was just Jay being his usual over complex self. He would soon figure it out, as he would be meeting the said ‘icy’ guy today.

They had exchanged numbers through Jay, and spoke on their plans about moving out for a fresh start, arranging money and housing plans. Both not having much issues with living together due to the mutual friend group. It was better than a complete stranger who they knew nothing about. The two had visited the small apartment on different occasions, never having the time to match up.

Jake didn’t have much of a problem with that, while being known as a social butterfly, he too was pretty shy and awkward at first. It soothed his anxiety that their meeting had gotten postponed. He was praying to every god above that his irrational phobia didn’t make much of an issue living with someone new. He had no idea how his mind was going to react or how he’d cope, but he was sure he’d figure it out! It’s better to stay optimistic rather than wasting time overthinking.

He sighed, finally turning to the car and getting in the drivers seat. The apartment wasn’t too far away, but still a boring drive. He had never been fond of driving either, hence why he didn’t own a car himself. As the journey began he became increasingly anxious of meeting Sunghoon for the first time, hoping he was as nice and relaxed as Jay and Heeseung had told him. Tapping his fingers over the steering wheel in a random rhythm as he drove through the busy streets.

___

Before dragging all his stuff up the flights of stairs, Jake wanted to check if anyone else was currently at the apartment. This theory was proved right when he saw various boxes laying outside, and the door wide open, signalling his roommate had already begun unpacking.

He hesitated for a moment, nerves getting the better of him. Taking a deep breath he mentally slapped himself.

Get it together Jake, It’s just a person, who’s apparently nice!

He carefully took a step inside the apartment, before heading to the main living room, more boxes lay across the floor of the completely empty rooms, his footsteps echoing slightly due to the lack of furnishing. It would take a while to get this place homely.
A voice behind him suddenly echoed, startling the blonde. He immediately turned to the direction of the source.

“Uhm, can I help?” A tall boy says, in a deep monotone tone.

Jake’s brain circuited for a second as he looked over at the other, he was incredibly handsome. Now, he had seen Sunghoon from his profile on social media, but nothing would prepare him for how breathtaking he looked in real life. He noticed how fair and pale his skin was, which greatly suited his complexion and jet black hair. Moles laid perfectly situated across his face. He had a nose which could only be described as perfect. And to top it off, he was tall, definitely reaching into the 6ft or taller.
Realising he had yet to reply, Jake panicked a little before bowing.

“Oh, hi I’m Jake, nice to meet you. Sunghoon, right?” He introduces himself, a little embarrassed, before looking back up and meeting his roommate’s gaze again. Said boy politely bowed back before answering.

“Yup that’s me, I didn’t realise you were coming yet, sorry for startling you.” He sheepishly apologises.

“Ah, no it’s fine, I’m a little jumpy.” He shyly replies looking down to the floor. Jake had never been too good at socialisation since he moved to Korea, always weary of his accent after countless teasing and pestering by classmates when he first moved here. A silence overcame them for a minute, causing the Aussie to tense up. “Uhm, I’ll go start bringing my stuff up.” He states, before starting to make his way back out the apartment.

Sunghoon only nod as a response, eyes following as Jake left. The same neutral expression plastered his face. He had to admit, he was a little intimidated in the taller’s presence. He had a pretty intense resting face causing a stern atmosphere. He was sure he’d warm up eventually, but for now, he passed Sunghoon down the stairs to the car to begin moving up his boxes.

His brother had agreed to come along and help tomorrow if he needed, which Jake greatly appreciated. He was already exhausted from dragging boxes to the car from his house. It was only 12pm yet he already felt like passing out in bed! Talk about low energy. Groaning as he grabbed the first few boxes, with much more to collect tomorrow, he made his way back up.

___

Hours and hours passed as the two boys moved boxes in and arranged their personal belongings in their previously claimed rooms. Suddenly, Jake severely regretted leaving his mattress for tomorrow, staring at the blankets and pillows on the floor for a makeshift bed. Sighing, he knew it would be an uncomfortable night.

He hadn’t exchanged many words with Sunghoon throughout the day, only small talk as they passed eachother. Such as the ravenette offering to help Jake with boxes he was struggling with, his exhaustion painfully obvious. He had never been the strong type. As much as he wanted to accept the kind offer, he felt like his pride was on the line, refusing it each time.

Thankfully enough, his phobia had yet to kick in as it was still light outside and there was a second body in the house subconsciously keeping him company. He hoped, it would stay like this.

Leaning down to finally open the last box for today, he came across glasses and cutlery. Picking the semi-heavy box up in his arms, he made way for the kitchen. To the blonde’s surprise, Sunghoon was already in there, leaning against the counter casually while looking intently at his phone screen.

From where he stood, Jake got a perfect view of the boy’s side profile, to which he could only feel envy. The perfect slope of his nose, and hair that hung just above his eyes. Sunghoon turned to him at the sound, examining the contents in his arm.
Jake placed the box on the kitchen counter.

“Hey perfect timing.” The other boy began talking, catching the attention of the shorter one. “I’m assuming you haven’t eaten, well, as we don’t have food in the apartment..” He began, a little awkward and hesitant in his speech. Jake couldn’t help but smile a little though, glad to know his roommate wasn’t some overly extroverted, perfectly social person. Now that, would be truly intimidating for an introvert like him.

“I was gonna order in just for tonight, do you want anything?” He questioned, meeting Jake’s eyes for a second, before the Aussie flickered his gaze away. Never able to maintain eye contact. He thought about the request for a second.

Would it be rude to say no? After all he’s just being nice. It’s just a meal, what’s the harm? Okay, but what if it gets awkward….

He replied before allowing himself to overthink such a simple thing.

“Yeah sure, that would be nice. What are you you getting?” He replies casually, as he began unpacking the plates and glasses from the box he had brought in.

“Is a Chinese good?” Sunghoon questions, a little anxious as he kept his eyes on Jake to spot his reaction. He turns back to him, nodding.

“That’s fine with me.”

The two spoke on what they were going to order back and forth, as the raventte confirmed and paid their order. Which was debated and argued by Jake. However he of course lost that debate. Sunghoon eventually came over to help him unpack the items into the cupboards. Which he was grateful for, a small smile still on his face as they spoke back and forth about random, small, things to erase the awkward silence. Getting to know one another a little.

In the short conversation, he had learnt that Sunghoon was a semi-retired figure skater, previously full time but wanting a break to focus on studies at university instead. However still went to the ice rink in free time. Jake admired him for that, amazed at the talent, his mouth dropping a little at the discovery. He suddenly, really, wanted to see him ice skate.

Sunghoon chuckled quietly at the other’s reaction, showcasing his sharp fangs that peaked through whenever he would smile.

How was this guy so perfect?

The two finished up with putting things away, still talking casually between them.
In return, Jake had explained that he was Australian, and had moved to Korea around 3 years ago due to his parents work. Sunghoon seemed to find it nothing but cool.

“Woah, that’s why you have an accent. You must speak English well then, right? That’s cool, I wish I could speak English.” He indulged in him. Jake couldn’t help but smile widely at that. Rather than making fun or belittling him, the taller seemed genuinely impressed by his Korean and English speaking skills, even asking the Aussie to say a few sentences in English. In his flustered state he refused, brushing the other off saying he would ‘another time’.

A sudden harsh knock at the door interrupted the peaceful conversation. Jake immediately tensed, eyes opening wide as he looked towards the direction of the door. He felt his anxiety kick in, the churning feeling in his stomach. Who would be here at this time? Why were they knocking so harshly?

Completely forgetting about the food they had ordered, Jake remained nervous until Sunghoon spoke.

“Ah that must be the food-“ He cut himself off, as he noticed his roommate’s tense state. “Hey are you alright man?” He questioned, concern in his eyes as he scanned over Jake.

It’s just our food, what’s wrong with me?

He cursed himself out as he let the anxiety get the better of him. Coughing awkwardly, he relaxed again. “Yeah sorry, the sound scared me a little is all…” he semi lied, while the sound was indeed the cause of his startling, it was not the main factor. That being his irrational fear that someone was politely waiting at the door to kill him. He knew this fear would die down after a while of living here. As long as he wasn’t alone. That would be a different story.

“You really are jumpy, huh?” He joked back, sending a small smile towards Jake before walking to the door to retrieve their food.

He sighed to himself, brushing his hands through his hair and down his face, pulling himself together.

You’re 19, Jake! Why am I scared of such minor things?

He chose to brush past it for now, turning to the plates and cups he just put away and putting two onto the counter for them to put the food on. They’d have to eat in here anyway, with no table or chairs yet put into the apartment. It seemed both parties were moving the larger stuff in tomorrow. As well as having to go furniture shopping soon as well. Jake was no good at picking things that matched or that looked good, so he sure as hell hoped his roommate did. He seemed like the type to.

Sunghoon happily walked back into the kitchen, placing the takeout down as the two sorted out the dishes between them. Jake repeatedly thanked the boy, still insisting that he pay for his half. The offer was only sweetly declined with a smile and reassurance that it was okay, the taller brought a hand up to pat his shoulder too.

Ultimately, Jake gave up once again as the two ate in silence. It wasn’t awkward, luckily. Both allowing themselves to enjoy the meal instead of trying to maintain a pointless conversation.

He was glad Sunghoon was as nice as he was told. However he definitely did understand the icy and awkward characteristics as Jay would describe. The raventte had an intense resting face, with sharp features, coming across as ‘icy’ you could say, as well as being shy and reserved with his speech when asking questions. Jake could relate to the second part only, being told often that he had a friendly and comforting presence. A ‘puppy’ he had heard before. He was grateful at times, it made him seem more confident and social than he really was.

It wasn’t all perfect, the two still struggled to make conservation at the start of the day, and a minor awkward tension still remained in the air. But that was only natural for two people who had just met. He felt like he could warm up to Sunghoon in no time, praying that the other felt the same way too.

As they finished their meals, Jake insisted on doing the dishes in repayment for the food. Sunghoon accepted after pressing his lips in a firm line and a small refusal. Bidding Jake goodnight, as he headed to his room for rest.

The sudden exhaustion from the day hit Jake all at once as he finally returned to his room after the long, draining day. A few boxes of clothes and other random things remained scattered around, not yet having his desk or wardrobe to put them into. Sighing loudly as he retreated to the ‘bed’ which was nothing but a few layers of blankets, a pillow and a duvet on the floor. But hey, it was better than nothing.

It was no where near homely yet, causing a slightly unsettling feeling to arise in his stomach and he sat anxiously on the blankets now changed into his nightwear. A natural pout formed on his lips as he longed to return to his own room just until he got a bed here, but knowing it was too late to head home now. Wrapping the duvet around himself, he stared at the ceiling above his head.

The exhaustion from mere minutes had suddenly gone, as usual when he wanted to sleep. His mind not adapted to the new environment, as predicted, it was going to be a difficult night.

Footsteps from outside in the corridor cause Jake to tense up, sitting up straight, almost as if he were a dog on alert when they heard a sudden sound. The creeping feeling of anxiety trickled into his chest per usual.

The Aussie reminded himself that Sunghoon was right next door, that he wasn’t alone in this new place. He had someone there with him, even if he didn’t know the boy well yet it was still better than no one.

It’s an apartment building! Of course there is going to be people outside, they live here too dumbass.

Scolding himself, he shook his head and began to lay down instead. It would also take time to adapt to the sounds from neighbouring people, and hell, apparently knocking on the door too!

As if a burglar is going to knock on the door and ask to steal my stuff. There’s nothing to steal anyway!

He wondered what he could’ve possibly done to gain such an irrational fear. Sure everyone was scared of being alone, someone breaking into your house, it’s only natural. However, maybe not to the degree that sends you into a panic attack at just being alone in your house at night. Or having high anxiety at just the slightest sound outside.

Time continued to tick slowly, Jake chose to finally respond to the messages in his phone.

From: Jay 🇺🇸🦅

‘hey hows hoon been? Not being too hostile is he’

The blonde couldn’t help but scoff at the question, hostile? He has been nothing but kind towards him. Was he usually hostile to other people? He had to admit, it wouldn’t be hard to picture with his presence.

‘Nah man he’s nice I was just paranoid for no reason🤦♂️’

He shot back the reply, nice, was probably an understatement if he’s being completely honest. Not everyone would just order and pay for someone’s food on their first time meeting. He was suddenly regretting not getting introduced to Sunghoon sooner. They had the same circle of friends, yet had never came into contact. Unlucky, Jake thought.

Still feeling a severe lack of tiredness as time continued to tick devastatingly slowly, he chose to get up and get a drink. Pulling the duvet off himself, as he trudged to the kitchen. Not enjoying the darkness at all. He felt a little relieved as he reached for the light switch.

He propped himself up on the counter after taking a drink, scrolling on his phone to pass time a little bit and keep his mind distracted. Amiss this, he heard footsteps approaching and sure enough Sunghoon came round the corner, hair much dishevelled compared to earlier, wearing a loose shirt and sweat pants.

Jake immediately panicked, jumping to the conclusion that his quiet laughter at his phone had awoken the boy.

“Oh- I’m sorry did I wake you?” He asks, a small pout appearing on his lips as he looked over to Sunghoon worried. Thankfully, he shook his head.

“No, I couldn’t sleep, I didn’t know you were in here. Sleep issues too?” He asks softly, going to the fridge to get out a half drank bottle of water from earlier. The basic necessities in the kitchen were all they had at the moment.

Relief washed over Jake, he definitely didn’t wanna cause issues and wake up his roommate on the first night here. Not a good impression.

“You could say that.” He hummed in response, kicking his legs a little as he placed his phone down. Hell was he going to explain his embarrassing phobia to him yet. He watched as Sunghoon came closer, propping himself onto the counter opposite Jake.

“Seeming as we’re both not tired, get to know each other more?” He softly suggested, peering towards Jake with a nervous stare. The blonde smiled smally, he liked how Sunghoon always knew how to keep the conversation flowing when he got anxious. Rather than immediately shutting away and not bothering as most people did, he persevered.

He nodded his head, looking up and matching their eyes for a second as he responded.

“That would be nice.”

Jake was very happy to have the company as they spoke back and forth about basic things once again. The anxiety from before long forgotten. They Learnt eachother’s birthdays. Both were thrilled to know they were 02’ liners and only 3 weeks apart in age, Jake proudly being the elder of course. He pouted furiously when the younger teased and assumed he was definitely older from his height and appearance. Which resulted in a sulking Jake.

“I’m not short! You’re just a giant.” He demanded.

Sunghoon snorted in reply as they threw jokes back and forth. It was weird to think, they had only met today yet clicked so well. Their personalities seemed to agree with eachother’s a lot, and there were definitely similarities between the two, Jake began to notice.

However, Sunghoon was a lot more firmer, trying to maintain eye contact as they spoke, easily moving the conversation to different places. The shyness from his voice faded the longer they communicated. The shock on his face gave Jake a turn to snort when he found he was studying physics AND maths. The younger was adamant that it was some kind of self torture. He found out that Sunghoon was studying psych and dance along the side. It made sense with his figure skating background after all. He was definitely the athletic type.

As the night progressed to the early mornings, Jake was so surprised with how easy it was to talk to someone new. He felt like he had never clicked so fast with a person, he absolutely had no complaints about such things. The younger of the two let out a yawn after a while, hopping down from the counter he had been perched on for the last hour or so. He wasn’t sure how long It had been.

“I think I’m finally tired now, I’m off to sleep. Goodnight, Jaeyun-ah.” He said for the second time tonight, tiredness lacing in his words.

Ah yes, Jake had also informed Sunghoon on his Korean name, telling him he didn’t mind what he called him. He mainly went by Jake with most people, as it was his most common name, especially growing up in Australia. Yet he didn’t mind his Korean name either.

“Goodnight Sunghoon.” He bid to him in return, as he watched the raventte stroll back into his own room, the door closing with a quiet click.

Jake too decided he should try sleep once again, the calming conversation with Sunghoon had definitely eased his nerves, maybe with that resting over his mind he would manage a few hours sleep before he needed to collect more things back home.

Luckily, the exhaustion of the day finally caught up with him as he fell asleep in his makeshift bed.

____

The morning soon came around, as Jaeyun, unwillingly, pulled himself from the comfort and warmth of his blankets to change and get ready to bring the first few pieces of furniture into his room. He definitely wasn’t looking forward to driving backward and forwards, there was no point in hiring a moving service not wanting to pay the money as well, he wasn’t that far away from his home. He was just being dramatic per usual. It would be nice at the end of the day to have his desk in his room and a mattress to sleep in. He assumed he and Sunghoon would go furniture shopping soon, opting to get the rest such as a new bed then. For now, he was happy with his desk and chair rather than having to sit on the cold floor.
Stretching his limbs and groaning about the day to come, Jake left his room after changing into appropriate clothes.

Sunghoon was already awake by the looks of it, his bedroom door wide open, boxes still scattered inside. However it seemed to be a bit more organised than Jake’s. He shrugged it off and walked to the kitchen to find his roommate. Once again, said boy was resting against the counter, eating away at some snacks he had brought with him.

Jake greeted him and explained he was heading home to collect more things and informing the younger his brother was coming to help with the moving. Sunghoon nodded in understanding, he too was doing the same for the most part. They bid eachother goodbye, as Jake headed back outside to his mother’s car he was borrowing for the time being.

Time went slowly as they drove back and forth from the house and apartment, endless teasing and jokes from his brother, which seemed to never stop.

“Awh my little bro is all grown up.” Jaehyuk expressed dramatically, wiping an imaginary tear from his face as the two were carrying Jake’s desk into the apartment.
Jake cringed and shot his brother a disgusted glare.

“Shut up you’re so annoying. I’m three years younger than you, you moved out last year!” He exclaimed, peering at his brother’s ‘stupid’ face. Laughter erupted from him as they continued to navigate through the apartment and finally placing the desk inside Jake’s bedroom, putting some parts they broke apart back together.

He sighed in relief, having gotten everything he wanted to bring over in the apartment. Even if it was tiring hours with a break. He could relax now, having everything he needed until he went shopping for more, whenever the two would do that. He hoped soon. Not liking how plain and boring his room looked.

The brothers stepped out the room, Jaehyuk getting ready to head home for the day, when Sunghoon had finally arrived back, carrying something heavy into the apartment, momentarily putting it down against the wall to greet the two. Jake physically cringed seeing his brother act so polite and kind to Sunghoon while he had relentlessly been bullying him all day.

“Hey man, let me help you with that.” Jaehyuk kindly offered. As much as Jake wanted to help. (He didn’t.) He was sure the two could manage it on their own. Moving away and resting against the wall as he watched the two carry what seemed to be a desk into Sunghoon’s room. Pulling out his phone and opting to scroll through that instead for the time being. Immersed in his phone, he hardly noticed his brother pull back Sunghoon for a moment as they stepped out the room.

Talking quietly towards him about something, the voices out of range from him to hear. Out of the corner of his eye, he swore he saw Sunghoon glance over at him, lips formed in a tight line. Butterflies swarmed in his stomach as he worried what on Earth his brother was telling his roommate about. An uneasy feeling as he begged it wasn’t anything embarrassing or weird.

Why did Sunghoon look so concerned? Gosh I hate siblings.

He saw his brother shoot a smile at Sunghoon and a nod, before walking over to Jake and immediately pulling him into a headlock, ruffling his hair aggressively. The Aussie immediately complained and yelped at the contact, shoving his brother off him with a scoff. He heard Sunghoon stifle a laugh from behind them, before walking back into his room.

“What shit were you telling him about me?” He questioned accusingly in English to his brother, who just had a smirk playing on his lips. That only made his anxiety worse!

“Just how annoying you were growing up.” He teased, before Jake could protest and call out bullshit, his brother had began rushing out the door.

“Come on slow poke, I wanna get home, I’m exhausted!” Exclaiming loudly, stretching his arms above his head. Jake just rolled his eyes at his unbelievable brother before following him out, mentally reminding himself to ask Sunghoon later on. After taking this man baby home that was!

__

After finally arriving home from dropping his brother back to his own apartment, Jake trudged up the stairs, the muscles in his arms straining from moving heavy objects all day. Oh boy, how he looked forward to doing that all again after the two roommates had bought new furniture.

The sun was setting as the day came to an end, Jake unlocked the door to his apartment and immediately headed for his his room where he collapsed on his soft mattress. Atleast there was something comfortable now! There may be no bed, but hey, a mattress is just as good. Sprawled out across it, he rested his eyes for a little, finally being able to stop moving for the first time today.

Well, that didn’t last long sadly. After around 10 minutes there was a soft knock at his bedroom door as Sunghoon called out he was coming in. As the door opened he quickly sat up from his awkward position, hair a mess and looking sheepishly towards Sunghoon. The raventte smiled at the other In amusement.

“Sorry I didn’t know you were resting.” He apologised awkwardly with a chuckle, a blush forming on Jake’s cheeks as he ran a hair through his hair to make it look semi presentable. “We should probably get some food, so I’m heading to the shop if you want to come…” He offered, glancing over at the elder boy for his response. “If you want free choice at what you get I guess.”

Jake internally groaned. No not at Sunghoon, he could never be upset with the boy’s polite actions. However he really, really wanted to stay in his semi-bed and sleep away the aching in his joints. But the boy knew he was no where near ready to be left alone in the apartment, let alone as the sun was setting and it would be dark before Sunghoon got back. The thought of being left alone in an empty cold apartment, chilled him to the bone. He could already practically feel the paralysing fear and he wasn’t even alone! So, he didn’t have much of a choice here.

Go to the shop or, have a panic attack!
He chose the first option.

“Yeah sure, I haven’t really eaten today anyway.” He accepted, pulling himself up from the bed and stuffing his wallet into his hoodie pocket. Definitely was not letting the other boy pay again today.

Sunghoon nodded back, the two putting on their shoes before walking down to the local shop to pick up things for the next few days. They spoke quietly or let a comfortable silence overcome them in the beautiful evening. The sun was setting, skies painted with beautiful oranges, pinks and whites. Creating the prettiest parade of colours. The sounds of birds tweeting and drifting through the sky above. Jake’s eyes practically sparkled as he stared aimlessly at the aesthetically pleasing sight. Not noticing Sunghoon beside him, admiring the twinkle in his eyes with a soft smile.

It wasn’t cold by any means just a gentle breeze, it was still summer after all. The boys arms brushed lightly against eachother’s on the narrow path, neither seemed too bothered by it to move. Jake enjoyed the company, he always enjoyed company. Forgetting all about his exhaustion, as he continued to walk with Sunghoon by his side.

As they were about to enter the shop, Jake remembered to ask his roommate about his conversation with Jaehyuk earlier. Still needing to know that his brother didn’t embarrass him to Sunghoon.

“Hey, what was my brother telling you earlier? When he pulled you aside?” Jake questioned, removing his gaze from one beauty to the one next to him instead.
Sunghoon smiled at the question, as he opened the door to the shop, allowing the shorter boy to walk in first.

“It wasn’t anything bad don’t get worked up about it.” He chuckled at Jake’s painfully obvious worried expression. “Just told me to watch over you, mentioned it was your first time staying away from family.” He explained, the elder peered at him, feeling like he was leaving something out. He dropped it though. Jake still felt rather embarrassed, blushing a little that his brother was treating him like such.

Still treating me like a little kid! He probably thinks I’m immature now.

He huffs out loudly and nods, pouting his lips a little per usual. Sunghoon had picked up on the little habit, finding it admirable.

“Hey it’s only natural, it’s just eldest sibling mentality.” He joked, nudging Jake a little bit to reassure him. “They’re always going to be protective, even when you’re 40!” Sunghoon explains, Smiling down towards Jake.

“Are you the eldest siblings by any chance?” He raised an eyebrow and shot a glare back up to the raventte, who proudly nodded in response.

“Yeah got a little sister. Let’s say I can get overly protective.”

“She must be lucky to have you.” Jake speaks with sincerity. While not knowing Sunghoon for long, he knew what a caring and kind guy he was already. He scoffed in response however, scanning through the selection of ramen as the two filled the basket with easy foods to make.

“You should tell her that! She definitely doesn’t think so.” Rolling his eyes, as he shoves more food into the cart. Jaeyun chucked, patting his shoulder. Understanding the sibling rivalry as the youngest. “All I do is try to help!” He scoffs.

“She’ll appreciate you one day, I promise.” He reassured, smiling to himself.

The two returned to a comfortable silence and small talk about what food to buy, and to Jake’s relief, he managed to convince Sunghoon to let him pay. Insisting that it made sense for repayment for the meal the other night, it wasn’t even as expensive either!

“Thanks Jakey.” He says, the nickname taking the Australian off guard. A wide smile appeared on his face though, let’s say he had no issues with being called Jakey by the boy.

Making their way back out the shop, the sun had almost completely disappeared, the pastel colours still visible on the horizon though. He adored sights like this. Anything pretty became an interest to Jake, he felt the urge to take a picture but frowning when he had left his phone his room. Oh well, he was sure there would be many other pretty sights to capture soon.

The trip was short, the two quickly returning back to the apartment and unpacking their items. Resulting in making ramen together in the kitchen. As it drifted into the peaceful night.

Jake slept easier that night, with the comfort of a mattress making it more comfortable and the calming presence of Sunghoon next door, he got a fulls night rest. He was glad Sunghoon became his roommate. Time seemed to fly fast with him.

_____

Hell, he was right, time did fly fast.

Before he knew it, the moving process was pretty much complete, over the course of a week or so. While a few minor things still needed to be bought, the apartment was looking nice. Thanks to Sunghoon’s visual eye and taste that was. He was very thankful to have someone with a good vision and knowing what colours looked nice. Otherwise this apartment would’ve been a complete mess.
His room became furnished for the most part, only small personal additions now needed. The living room and kitchen remained completely furnished, the echoing and hollow feeling from before now completely gone. The two boys had worked non stop for the last week to get everything done as quickly as possible, they did have to return to work and uni soon after all.
The two had moved in during summer break, as they had the most free time from their jobs and studying.

Speaking of the younger. The two had only grown closer through the course of living together. Already on terms of joking and teasing, Jake could say for sure he enjoyed the presence of Sunghoon a lot. Extremely grateful to get along so easily with him. Being together for most of the week as they shopped for furniture and food, and other minor things, he was comfortable with the taller already. Feeling like they had been friends for a long while, when in fact, they had only met over a week ago.

Sunghoon sure was charming, knowing how to keep a flow of conversations. And he was surprisingly funny too. He never failed to make Jake smile and laugh if he wasn’t feeling too great. Despite this, he also knew when to be serious and when to give the shorter boy space. It was strange how observant he was. Jake passing it off as the psychology student within him. It made sense In reality. Or perhaps he was just very easy to read.

He always made sure to check on Jaeyun, whenever he would be leaving for the shop or elsewhere, he always offered the Australian to come with him. It made the blonde suspicious if he had managed to snuff out his phobia already. Was a psych course really that good that you can just spot mental illness!? (No definitely not.)

As the two had been pretty inseparable over their time together, Jake’s anxiety had been rather tame. Never getting too high, as Sunghoon was always nearby if a sudden sound or event shocked him. Reminding him again and again he was safe just by his presence.

He was caring and very comforting, through the next further week the two continued to stay together for the most of it. Still progressing and getting to know eachother, trying to get out the phase of awkward silences now and again. Jake could definitely say the ‘icy’ side of the figure skater wasn’t there anymore.

But hell, Park Sunghoon sure loved to tease a lot ,however. The boy would continuously drape an arm around Jake’s shoulder, or simply rest his arm upon the shorter boys head. Suggesting he was a good ‘arm rest’. Which always resulted in a pouting, sulking, Jake and an over the moon Sunghoon who would laugh loudly at his distress. If anyone were to look at the two, they’d assume they’d been best friends for years.

Jake had always been a touchy person, his habit of naturally falling onto someone when he laughed, resisting the urge to always hug his adorable friend Jungwon whenever he saw him. (He infact, never resisted the urge.) Pinching Sunoo’s cheek. (Apparently Sunghoon also did that too.) So he minded no care as Sunghoon would place an arm around his shoulder, ruffle his hair, or subconsciously place a hand on his waist. He enjoyed affection and physical touch a lot, always taking comfort in it.
He was clueless that the taller boy was hardly ever touchy with anyone else, something unique to him.

The two weeks and abit seemed to pass smoothly for the pair, not running into any issues yet. Well, not yet.

Unfortunately, Jake always knew that at some point his ridiculous phobia was going to kick in. Sunghoon had a life after all, he wasn’t going to be with Jake all the time. Especially as the boy worked till the night rather than morning, unlike the Australian himself. It was just a matter of time till Jake realised the sun had far vanished, and he was alone in the apartment for the first time.

_____

Jake opened his eyes to darkness, blinking multiple times to rid of the usual blurry vision. He groaned sitting up from his awkward sleeping position. He definitely didn’t mean to fall asleep, nor did he recall it. Sighing, he leant over switching on the lamp on his bedside table, to yknow, be able to see.

Upon opening his eyes he noticed his laptop, in which he had been binge watching a new series, was closed and placed neatly onto the table too. Suddenly hitting him he had fallen asleep while aimlessly staring at his laptop.

A blanket he was sure he didn’t have earlier was draped over him lightly. And now that he thought about it, he definitely did not turn his own light off. He furrowed his eyebrows upon noticing it mustve all been done by his ever so sweet roommate, Sunghoon.

The boy couldn’t help but smile a little to himself, knowing he had cared enough to make sure he was comfortable in his slumber. Yet, feeling very embarrassed that his roommate had witnessed him falling asleep in a bright room with a Netflix series right in front of him.

Shaking his head, Jake stood up from the bed and stretched his limbs. Shifting out of the room to go check on his roommate too.

Weirdly enough, he wasn’t sat in the living room as he usually was on his laptop doing assignments or whatever game he would play on there. Pursing his lips together, he walked and noticed he was not in the kitchen either. The bathroom door was slighting open so he definitely assumed he wasn’t there.

He felt a little bit of anxiety grow inside him, before heading to the boy’s bedroom and knocking on the door. Once no one answered he gently pushed the door open into the dark room with all the light switches off. However it was clear that Sunghoon wasn’t in there either. Switching on the light to make sure, Jake’s eyes scanned the room.

Unlike his, Sunghoon’s room was a lot more simplistic and definitely more organised. It had only been 3 weeks and he already had things absolutely everywhere. He glanced into the room, walls a light greyish tone, a pinboard with pictures and assignment lists organised neatly on the wall. The bed that was in the centre of the room was properly made, however definitely had more pillows than necessary. They were the same in that respect. A white desk was pushed against the wall, his laptop sitting neatly in the middle while plugged in charge, as well as stationary pots on the left hand size. A window resting infront of the desk, a view to the outside which was pitch black by this time.

Wait, pitch black?

Jake double checked, and coming to the conclusion that his roommate was not here either. And it was completely dark outside.

“Hoon?” He called out worryingly, hoping that he was elsewhere in the apartment. There hadn’t been a night since they moved in that Sunghoon wasn’t with him. The tense feeling in his stomach arose as he swallowed down harshly.

I’m fine! I’m literally just in my house why am I scared??

He tried mentally scolding himself to rid of the pointless anxiety. Quickly walking back to his room and picking up his phone. To no surprise a message from Sunghoon, 3 hours ago, highlighted on his screen.

From: Hoon

‘I saw you fell asleep and didn’t want to wake you ):
I got called into work, it’s a short shift tho I’ll be home soon so don’t worry!’

‘Also don’t fall asleep with a screen in front of you. It’s bad for your eyes‼️’

Well it most definitely too late for both of those things. He was definitely worrying and definitely fell asleep with a screen in front of his eyes. Roughly taking his bottom lip between his teeth, he slung a blanket around himself, phone still in hand as he made his way to the living room for the antagonising wait for Sunghoon to return home.

He really did hope he was truthful when he said the shift wouldn’t be long, it had already been 3 hours so he couldn’t be gone that much longer could he? It was already getting late.

Sitting down on the couch he tried to distract his mind for a bit, playing soothing music while playing small mind focusing games he had downloaded specifically if his anxiety was playing up. However, they only worked if it was just a minor worry. By the second he was becoming overly conscious that he was the only one here.

Jake physically flinched and turned to the direction of the door as he heard noises from outside, biting further down on his bottom lip.

It’s probably just the neighbours. Calm down.

He forced himself to look back towards his phone. He really, really, prayed his dog, Layla, was with him right now. She often followed Jake around the house, completely inseparable. Sleeping In his bed, she gave Jake a sense of security, like a little protector. He knew if anyone was around she’d bark. Yet she wasn’t here to do that, leaving him to figure it out himself. There was no form of security blanket.

Footsteps from outside continued to sound and cause the boy to freeze up each time, his heart beat not resting as his chest turned tight. The only thing he could hear was a ringing in his ears and the pounding of his heart. Phone now disregarded on the coffee table in front of him, as he gripped tightly to the blanket around him till his knuckles went white.

He hated this uneasy feeling that would come across him, for just being alone. He hated the emptiness it made him feel, scared that he would be alone for long. He hated the way he could feel his throat have that feeling after you had cried for hours straight. Blocked and hard to breathe through. Suffocating you.

He pulled his hands aggressively down his face, as countless irrational situations on what could occur when he was alone flashed through his mind. Knowing he was not going to feel secure until someone was here with him. Anybody.

The sudden obsession to have someone here with him was strong, yet he couldn’t get himself to reach for his phone or move at all, as the trembling of his limbs began. As much as he wished for someone to come over, he didn’t want to bother anyone. He didn’t want to bother his brother, or family, who already didn’t think he was capable of living alone. All worried for him knowing his symptoms. It would be shameful. He didn’t need a baby sitter. Nor did he want to call a friend, everyone was unaware of severe phobia.

The past few months, his anxiety had never been triggered often. Finally thinking he was getting better, feeling secure at home and alone. He hoped moving in to a new environment, a public apartment building, would help battle the anxiety further. However, it seemed it wasn’t that simple after all.

The continuous obsessing of needing someone here with him, wanting to walk out the apartment just so he could be safe in public was tempting. Yet he couldn’t move as his breath became uneven, legs rapidly shaking up and down. His body felt numb, as drops of water splattered over his legs. He was crying.

Begging Sunghoon to just come home he closed his eyes and forced himself to take deep breaths. One benefit he guessed, is that right now he felt no shame of his roommate coming home and seeing him like this. All he wanted was someone, to help put his heart at ease and the numbness in his body to go away. If he was thinking straight he would definitely be embarrassed out of his mind. It had only been almost 3 weeks since he met his roommate after all, any normal person would feel ashamed. Yet that was the least of his worries.

Breath still coming out unevenly, he felt like this had been going on for a century, tears still continued to flood his face and all his senses became incoherent. Continuing to curl up himself, he chocked between breathes and sobs. Awaiting his roommate to finally come home and put an end to this futile panic attack.

He despised himself for such a pathetic fear, wishing he could be like any usual person. Perhaps some people are glad to be home alone, having a whole house or apartment to themselves. How he begged that’s how he could act. However, he allowed himself some kind of excuse as it was his first time being alone here, unexpected too.

Too caught up in the paralysing anxiety that was eating away at him at the second, chest so tight he felt like he was going into a heart attack, the ringing in his ears too loud that he didn’t notice the sound of the keys in the door. Nor did he notice the person in front of him, putting a gentle hesitant hand on his shoulder.

Finally being able to see through the tears, he did pick up on the presence in front of him. However in that moment, it only erupted more panic. Flinching harshly away, he felt like he was drowning. Until he realised he recognised the muffled, soothing voice.

“It’s me Jakey, it’s Hoon.” He assured. As Jake looked down, he saw both his hands tightly grasped between two others, a thumb running over his skin. As the voice continued to sound through his half functional senses, he finally clocked that it was indeed Sunghoon crouched before of him.

Coffee table shoved to the side aggressively, instead replaced with the younger boy. Moving his gaze, which was clouded with tears, he looked toward the other. Concern and panic plastered over his face.

He was obviously clueless on what to do, how the hell was he going to explain this to him? The fight for breath only continued, the younger noticing this he stood up, and pulled Jake towards him. Wrapping his arms securely around Jake’s smaller frame continuing to whisper into his ear.

“You’re okay, I’m here. I’m sorry for leaving.”

The honey laced voice calmed Jake down slowly, and continued to do so as he kept talking. Bending forward to keep him close. Jaeyun hid away into the boy’s chest, taking in the scent and everything around him as best he could, to soothe himself, and remind him he wasn’t alone anymore. Sunghoon was finally home. The calming scent of his perfume flooding his senses.

“Sunghoon?” He spoke between breaths, just wanting reassurance.

“Yeah, it’s me Jaeyun-ah.” Oh, how sweet his voice sounded. A hand moved to Jake’s back and rubbed various patterns through his shirt. The other arm still firmly wrapped round his shoulder.

“Breathe slowly, Jakey.” He ushered with care into the elder’s ear, taking deep breaths with him. “You’re not alone.”

The two stayed like that for a while, the worst of Jake’s panic attack coming to an end, yet tears still fell idly from his eyes. He basked in the current comfort, the comfort that soothed him so well. Breaths now coming out more evenly, allowing his lungs to fill with oxygen again. The tightness in his chest no longer felt like burning.

Finally at peace.

However, as Sunghoon shifted away, arms retracting from around Jake he became alert. Gripping tightly at his wrist, hands still shaky.

“Please don’t go.” Cracked and broken, his voice spoke.
Sunghoon smiled softly in response, placing his other hand over the shorter’s smaller one.

“I’m not going anywhere, I’m right here.” With the reassurance, Jake hesitantly removed his hand. Sticking to his word, the raventte immediately sat down on the couch instead, next to Jake, once again pulling him closer. Snaking his arms tightly round his waist. To which the other gladly accepted, leaning forward into the crook of his roommate’s neck. Basking in his friend’s touch.

As they stayed like that, Sunghoon continued to move one hand up and down his back, the other having a firm but gentle hold on his waist. All of a sudden, a softer feeling arose in Jake. Similar to anxiety, but this anxiety didn’t take his breath away, nor made his chest hurt. He felt warm in his hold, butterflies fluttering, not thrashing, in his stomach as Sunghoon continued to consume all his senses.

He was so comfortable, in the hold, feeling nothing but pure bliss. Contrasting significantly to the worst panic attack he’d had in months just mere minutes ago.
Closing his eyes, he allowed his body to finally relax and melt into the warmth. Almost like he was being lulled to sleep, a gentle, relaxing feeling overcame him as he felt like something was running carefully through his hair. The touch making him nothing but sleepy, Jake eventually fell asleep in Sunghoon’s arms.

“Sleep well, Jakey.” He whispered sweetly.

____

Jake awoke the next morning, sprawled out on the couch, his blanket comfortably laid over him. Groaning, he buried himself back into the bundles of warmth. As he casually relaxed, he remembered the events from last night coming back to him all at once.

Eyes widened, his vision still not used to waking up, he sat up quickly. Sunghoon wasn’t on the couch with him where he fell asleep last night.

Oh fucking hell he saw me have a panic attack and I fell asleep on him.

A furious blush burnt his face as he remembered how stupid he acted. Chasing after his roommate’s hold, let alone falling asleep in his arms!
Gosh, he probably felt so awkward. He was never going to redeem himself after this.

Placing hands either side of his face, squeezing his own cheeks, he collected himself. Trying to think of reasonable explanations as to why he had a sudden panic attack in the middle of their apartment at that time of night.

Speaking of which, he suddenly realised that Sunghoon was no where in sight. Dragging himself from the comfort of the soft couch, he did the same routine with checking the apartment. Going into an internal panic once again, upon noticing his roommate was gone, again!

Not again, not again!

He exhaled, keeping himself calm. Ain’t no way was he letting another pointless panic attack overcome him first thing in the morning.

Oh, but there was so, so, so much to worry about! The embarrassment. What if Sunghoon thought he was weird? What if he was creeped out by his touchiness? They had only known eachother 3 weeks! What if he felt entitled to take care of him? He probably soaked his shirt with tears last night- And he was alone in the apartment for a second time!

Today was not off to a good start. Tears began to prick his eyes before he could even comprehend his emotions. His mind a jumbling mess.

However, said internal panic came to a quick finish when he heard the keys turning in the door, and the cause of his dilemma walked in, gripping a shopping bag in his hand.

Sunghoon’s eyes widened a little upon seeing Jake’s frantic state yet again, easily noticing the glossiness of his eyes. Quickly rushing over he placed his free hand at the nape of Jake’s neck.

“Hey, what’s wrong? I’m sorry, I thought you would be out cold for a few hours longer, you seemed exhausted.” He pursed his lips, eyes shaping in concern and worry. Tone soft and calming.

It always seemed to be with Jake.

Jake contemplated on what to say. No idea what excuses he could come up with, or how he’d either begin to explain his phobia! Sunghoon was probably lost as hell, having no clue why he was like this. Hold on- actually-

He doesn’t seem confused, at all.

Jake furrowed his eyebrows, did he know of his condition? He was pretty certain he had never had the conversation with his roommate before. I think it would be pretty memorable if he explained.

“Yeah just, can’t be alone. I’m a whole 19 years old. But leave me in a room alone for like 10 minutes? Whole mental breakdown.”

Yeah. He would’ve definitely remembered that.

Deciding to put that in the back of his mind for the next few minutes, he functioned an answer to the worried boy infront of him whos eyes were flickering over him for a response.

“I’m fine, I’m sorry.” He whispered out, too embarrassed to speak louder, and the fact his throat was still store from sobbing his guts up last night.

Jake suddenly became ,very, conscious of the hand on his neck as Sunghoon subtly ran his fingers over the smooth skin and hair that was getting too long. The same fluttering butterflies from last night appeared again, making him feel warm inside. He gulped down nervously.

“Don’t apologise, you have nothing to be sorry for. I got your favourite ramen and snacks.” He reassured, pulling his hand away from his neck to ruffle Jake’s hair instead, before making his way to the kitchen to put away the food.

He blushed lightly as he followed Sunghoon to the kitchen, missing the contact but the warm feeling still residing inside as he watched his friend pull out all his favourite snacks. All of a sudden, he felt like crying. So grateful to the male infront of him, for everything he’s done for Jake the last 3 weeks.

He was definitely going to kill his friend group from keeping this guy from him!

Before he could even think about it, he walked over and wrapped his arms around Sunghoon, stuffing his face into his neck. Overwhelmed by emotions.

“Thank you Hoon. You didn’t need to do that, really.” He says softly, pulling away from his neck a little afterwards. About to part away until arms were wrapped around his waist in return, a strong but gentle hold. His face burnt at the close proximity, he was sure Sunghoon could probably feel the heat on his neck! that’s how hot he was getting.

“It’s no problem, I wanted to treat you.” He says, running a soothing hand through his bedhair, making it more neater with gentle touches. The two pulled away, Sunghoon offering him a sweet smile.

He felt so grateful for his friend, lacking the words to be able to tell him. He nodded his head in response, the two ending up moving back to the couch, Jake having some of the snacks he had been bought in his hand. He was definitely hungry after all this stress. Continuing to eat away, as the two remained in a comfortable silence, while Sunghoon browsed for things to watch on the TV.

Building up the courage to ask, Jake took a breath placing down his food.

“Hoon.” He says, gaining the attention of the other male who turns his focus towards him. “Do you know?” He nervously says, catching his bottom lip between his teeth. Sunghoon raised an eyebrow in response.

“Know what?” He questions, looking more intently now.

Realising how dumb he sounded, Jake blushed a little and tilted his head. Yup, he was totally gonna know what he was on about from ‘do you know?’.

“Well, last night..you didn’t question or anything about what had happened. Or why I was scared. You just, seemed to know it was okay cause you came back home. And earlier when you apologised for leaving- you didn’t seem phased at all that I was panicked again. Yknow, normally people would be a little confused.” He explained, stuttering a little, biting further on his bottom lip. He was sure it was going to bruise at this rate. Sunghoon let out a sigh at this, adjusting his position a little bit before responding.

“Can you promise not to hate your brother if I tell you?” He questioned out the blue, causing Jake to send him a puzzled look. Sunghoon couldn’t help but chuckle a little at his expression. “When we were first moving in and your brother pulled me aside, he was explaining that you had anxiety about being alone. Specifically in the house or apartment too. Asked me to watch over you. So I briefly knew, but I didn’t think it was, uh, to that degree. If I did I would’ve definitely woken you up to tell you before I went to work.” Sympathy and a little guilt coated the words. It was obvious he felt bad for leaving Jake alone and causing that panic attack, when he was warned about the phobia too.

Jake was surprised, and a little upset that his brother didn’t even talk to him about telling Sunghoon. However he knew in reality he had told him because he was worried for Jake. In some ways it’s benefitted him too, Sunghoon stuck close the last three weeks and had an idea of what was happening during his panic attack. He nodded his head in understanding.

What seemed to strike him the most though, is how there was no judgement in Sunghoon’s words. He didn’t act like his condition was dramatic or stupid. The boy seemed genuinely concerned, and wanted to help. Jake felt his heart warm up, appreciative of his roommate yet again.

“It’s okay, it would’ve happened anyway if you did tell me.” He explains, taking a breath. “I’m sorry for not telling you, I was just scared you’d think I’m weird or dramatic or something.” He shrugged, flickering his gaze away from Sunghoon.
The younger boy frowned at this, shifting forward so he was closer to Jake.

“I’d never think you’re weird, or dramatic. You’re neither of those things, if anything you’re so strong. Living with this must be difficult.”

Jake officially had the greatest roommate and friend. No one was convincing him otherwise. The urge to cry once again appeared.

“I think you’ll need to explain it more to me though,” he starts again, slowly reaching his hand for Jake’s. Placing his own over the smooth skin of the blonde’s. Thumb slowly tracing over. Jaeyun felt himself heat up yet again. “So we can both work together to help you. I don’t want you to get more panic attacks when I might not be around to help.”

So he did. Jake explained the in and outs of autophobia, and how he was going to start back up his therapy again, he had stopped it for the last few months upon thinking he had somewhat recovered. Quickly learning that was not the case. Sunghoon encouraged him to keep talking, hand never leaving Jake’s own one, occasionally squeezing in reassurance.
Jake assured he wouldn’t have a panic attack to that degree again unless it was unexpected and sudden, however would still suffer anxiety if he was alone.

The two knew it was hard to not get times where Jake wouldn’t be left in the apartment, due to Sunghoon’s part time shifts being in the evening till night. So they opted to keep communicating throughout text when the raventte would be at work, when he could of course. Jake explained with time, his anxiety would ease up and hopefully feel secure in the apartment at night alone. He was grateful he had a few more days before he would be alone again.

The conversation soon drifted to lighter topics of assignments and their uni time tables as they were going back just next week after the long break. Their time tables often clashed, as well as their departments being significantly far away from each-other, explained how they had never managed to meet before despite their mutual friends. Jake was closer to Jay, Jungwon and Niki (his child, as Jake would say) while Sunghoon remained closer to Heeseung and Sunoo. By awful luck, the two had met and hung out with everyone in the friend group aside eachother.

“I wish I had met you sooner Jakey.”

His sudden words caused the said boy to blush shyly, agreeing with him. He too, wished he had met Sunghoon sooner.

____

On the discussion of their chaotic friends, Jay had insisted on coming to visit their new apartment a few days later. A house warming party! (There was going to be no party.) No one in the group had yet to see their apartment so Jay demanded on being the first. The others agreed they’d stop by in the evening too.

“What the fuck!? Why is this so much nicer than my apartment?” The American loudly exclaims, in disbelief as he roamed around the living room and kitchen of the two boy’s apartment.

“Maybe cause Sunghoon knows how to furnish and you don’t?” Jake mockingly yells after him, plopping himself on the couch beside the mentioned boy. The raventte laughing loudly at the comment.

“Oh I don’t wanna hear you talking, if you were in charge this place would look worse than mine. Have you seen your room? It’s been like three weeks dude.” Jay snickers, looking as a blush spread across the Aussies face. Sunghoon chuckling at the two bickering between eachother.

“Shut up! It’s not messy, it’s just unique. I know where everything is, that’s all that matters.” He whines, naturally sulking again at the complaint. Now it’s not like his room was unclean. There was no clothes or rubbish laying around, instead he just had various open draws, compact walls of posters and polaroids. It was eventful! Not everyone wants a boring simplistic room.
The boy beside him naturally consoles him by ruffling his hair for a second before letting his arm stay resting on Jake’s shoulders. The blonde happily embracing the contact, as he shifted slightly closer to Sunghoon.

“Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night man.” Jay replies, waving him off with a hand. He couldn’t lie, watching that interaction between Sunghoon and Jake confused him. Raising an eyebrow in their direction. The tall boy was known for being rather distant and not so much affectionate. He had been around Hoon many times, known him for years, and had hardly seen the boy be touchy with anyone. But since he’s been here alone, in the last 20 minutes, he’s ruffled Jake’s hair twice, had an arm round his waist, and now round his shoulder. He opted to asking Jake about it later on.

Not that he had an issue with it of course, he was glad the two were getting on well. Especially with how anxious Jake had been, the last thing he wanted were for the two to clash and for his best friend to become a miserable puppy whenever he saw him.

The three lounged around for a while, watching some movies that interested them, but mostly lost focus and resulted in teasing and joking around with eachother instead. Jay getting one too many pillows thrown at his head.

As the door knocking startled Jake, jumping up a little, Sunghoon laughed at the boy before getting up to answer. Jay taking this as his chance to ask Jake. Quickly slipping next to him, as he heard the door open. Sunoo and Ni-ki could be heard already loudly bickering about what number their apartment was as they entered.

“I told you it was this one, dumbass!”

He knew those two would keep Sunghoon occupied for a while.

“Hey bro, is there something going on between you and Sunghoon?” He casually asks. In response, Jake practically chokes on air as he stared in shock at his friend. Raising an eyebrow in confusion. Red painted his face.

“No? Why the hell would you think that.” He exclaimed. Jay shrugged, a little surprised at the answer. It seemed like it.

“I’ve known Sunghoon for years and never seem him be so affectionate to someome is all.” He innocently replies, slouching down into the couch taking a handful of crisps as he did. The blonde was puzzled by this, he assumed he was equally as touchy with everyone else as he is him. He began to feel the familiar warm feeling inside.

“What, really?” He questioned back, shock evident on his lips. “He’s usually normally like this with me.” Before Jay could get a chance to reply, Jake was crushed by the tallest 16 year old he’s seen in his life.

“Jake Hyung!” He yelled, practically tackling the poor 5’8 boy who was peacefully minding his own business. Groaning at the contact, arm being crushed and all. Jay had ,by the looks of it, succeeded in moving away before the vicious attack. Now laughing loudly at the two.

“Niki get off me! Or I’ll ban you from eating boongeobbang!!” He exclaimed loudly, despite his ‘suffering’ he still had a wide smile on his face, as his friend sighed loudly and rolled off him to the empty section of the couch.

“Why’s your face so red?” The maknae innocently asks, the blush still there from a few moments ago. He peered over at Jay, who once again barked out a laugh in response.

“No reason.” He dismisses it, as Jay scoffs. The American swore for a second, he saw Sunghoon shooting a glare his way.

As Heeseung and Jungwon soon later joined, the 7 boys gathered in the living room, talking amongst eachother and getting up occasionally to raid the poor homeowner’s fridge and cupboards. Sighing, Jake knew the two would definitely have to go shopping tonight. It was weird that it was the first time the group had gathered, all 7 of them. Jake and Sunghoon adamant they had intentionally kept them apart. As the other 5 all defended themselves with their life.

Per usual, the two roommates had gravitated towards eachother like second nature. After entertaining the youngest enough, Jake collapsed onto the couch, nudging into Sunghoon who was unphased. Simply basking in the contact of his friend, placing a hand to the back of his neck. Before gluing his eyes back onto the screen infront of him.

While the other two had been off, doing whatever riki pleased, the group decided to begin on watching ‘Alice in borderland’. Upon noticing the Japanese from the television, Riki perked up his head, sitting comfortably on the floor to watch the series, grateful he didn’t need the subtitles to understand. Jake couldn’t help but quietly laugh at how quickly the maknae had changed his focus from pestering to being completely engrossed in the series. He really was so cute.

He had proudly taken on the title of Niki’s parent when his own weren’t around. The group we all aware of how smitten he was to the youngest, doing everything in his power to make sure he enjoyed his childhood and youth. Even if he himself was still technically in his youth. Wherever Niki wanted to go, a simple request to Jake and the rest was history. He was one of the other people in his life he got on so well with, despite the age gap. He was like a little brother he’d never had, speaking more realistically.

Sunghoon had glanced over at Jake’s endearing stare towards the younger, and felt himself smile too. He found both of them adorable.

As the evening progressed, the 7 had made more plans to all hang out together. On top of creating a group chat for them all to communicate plans, rather than having to Dm everyone. Now that Sunghoon and Jake had met, it was more easier to have all 7 of them in there.

The group were full of so many different personalities and ages that just seemed to click so well with eachother. It was a comfortable cozy group, where conversation never seemed to stop flowing. Playful banter and teasing, they all felt like it was fate to be together. There wasn’t a pair that you could say weren’t close friends. Jake felt like he had a different relationship with each one of the boys, none of them bad.

One by one they began heading home, after all teasing Sunoo for almost crying at the series as it played it’s brutal scenes. The boy had claimed the rest of them were just ‘heartless!’ As the last to leave closed the door, Jake let out a contented sigh. He hadn’t seen his friends in a while due to the chaos of moving in and everyone busy with work and assignments. It was nice to have gathered again after a long while, it made him feel really appreciative for the group, fortunate enough to have such amazing people in his life.

One of those amazing people made his way back over after seeing Heeseung out, picking up some bowls and trash that were left on the coffee table from earlier. He suddenly felt a pair of eyes on him. Turning towards Jake and raising an eyebrow.

“What’s up with you?” He questioned to which Jake giggled.

“Nothing, I’m just happy.” Sunghoon met his eyes, the elder’s contagious smile spreading to his own face.

“Yeah, me too.” Replying, as he began taking the things he collected to the kitchen. Jake soon sitting up and helping the other tidy up too, skipping his way into the kitchen. Ending the night on a good note, content with eachother. Jake was starting to think, that this amazing person was becoming his favourite.

____

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” Sunghoon worriedly asked, a firm hand on Jake’s arm as he stood at the door, waiting to head to work. Well, hesitating to go to work.

Unfortunately for Jake, the few days of relaxation had ended. The two had returned to uni 2 days ago, and Sunghoon officially back at his part time job this night. Meaning he was going to be left alone in the apartment for the second time. While he certainly was nervous, he knew it wouldn’t be as difficult as the first night. Having spoken to his therapist again for coping mechanisms, and that he and Sunghoon had agreed to message as often as the younger could.
He smiled reassuringly, placing his hand over his.

“Yes, I promise.”

Still not totally convinced, Sunghoon frowned, worry in his eyes. Paranoid he’d come home to Jake in that state again. While he seemed calm and content the first time, internally he was panicking a lot, terrified on how to help his roommate. Dread climbed through his heart at the possibility of Jake being in that state again. Because of him. However he knew he couldn’t skip his shift, no matter how much he wanted. Thankfully, today wouldn’t be long either. Only 4 hours.

“Fine, call me if you need me to come home, okay?” He asks, finally detaching his hand from Jake’s arm. He nodded enthusiastically in return.

“I will!” A bright smile to try convince Sunghoon he was okay. “Have a good shift.” He scoffed in response.

“I’ll try. I’ll message you when I can.” He told him, before walking out the apartment, the door closing with a click.

Upon being left alone, Jake took a deep breath, trying to trick his mind in thinking that Sunghoon was just next door or something. He needed to work on new physics homework he had been assigned already. Jake found it incredibly upsetting he had already been set an unbelievable amount of work to do, on just the second day back. Picking up his laptop and work sheet, he shuffled into the living room, setting up the temporary work station. He felt most comfortable alone in the living room. It was the place he and Sunghoon mainly spoke, well here and the kitchen. The two meet there a lot, weirdly enough.

It was comforting, feeling as though his presence was still there. The two had found themselves sitting here close together through the recent nights, watching movies or just casually talking. Sometimes no words needed to be said, they just basked comfortably knowing the other was nearby. The two were definitely magnets, somehow always gravitating towards eachother.

He felt a little on edge knowing that, and knowing there was no one in the house with him right then. His chest feeling a little tight as he opened up his question sheet and calculator for his awaiting physics homework, which was staring at him to get done.

Around 15 minutes passed before he heard the ping on his phone, he smiled to himself as he saw the message from Sunghoon display on the screen.

From: Hoon 😊

‘its only been 5 minutes and my manager has yelled at me somehow! I wanna come home already 😐
are you okay?’

Typing his answer, he felt much at ease as he could practically hear Sunghoon’s tone through the message, chuckling to himself.

’Awh why did she yell at you? ):
Im doing okay!’

They conversed for a while before Sunghoon was about to get his ‘ass kicked’ when his manager caught him on his phone, typing a quick goodbye with typos, Jake managed to make out what he was saying. He shook his head at his roommate, smiling dumbly to himself. While the sense of feeling unsafe was definitely still present, it definitely wasn’t as bad as before. Clearly. No panic attack tonight, masochists!

Time progressed semi smoothly. It would be a lot better without the underlying fear that something awful was going happen, but beggars can be choosers! Unfortunately enough though, the uneasiness was enough to keep his mind occupied as he tried his best to focus on answering questions. His brain somehow always drifting due to paranoia and noises that might’ve all been in his head anyway. He groaned frustratingly as he lost his train of thought yet again, checking his phone as the notification sound echoed.

From: Hoon 😊

‘I’m leaving work now, I’ll be home soon but can’t text ):
Wont be long <3’

Heat rushed to his face, noticing the heart at the end of the message.

He tried to get himself to focus on his assignment upon reading it, knowing that Sunghoon would be home soon. Keeping in active contact through out the night by texting had certainly soothed his nerves a lot. While being physically alone, it removed his obsession of feeling alone. As Sunghoon messaged stupid or random questions, or complaining about how rude customers were, or how annoying his manager was. While feeling bad for the boy, he was glad he had so much to complain about at work, helping soothe his anxiety. Most of all, he felt relieved as Sunghoon would mention how badly he wanted to come home almost every text. It gave him a sense of security and calmness that he wasn’t going to be abandoned.

As Jake stared blankly at his question paper, mind not being able to focus still due his creeping anxiety, keys in the door could be heard, echoing through the room. Turning his head in the direction, in came Sunghoon. He looked exhausted already, hair a little disheveled, and clothes creased. He exhaled loudly as he closed the door behind him, shoving off his jacket and shoes.

Immediately upon seeing the boy, Jake’s anxiety eased up, feeling much more relaxed than he had minutes ago. The light at the end of the tunnel. The raventte made his way over, greeting his roommate as he did, sitting down closely next to him, legs brushing together.

Jaeyun was a little taken aback as Sunghoon rested into his side, an arm naturally snaking round his waist. Placing his head against his arm, letting out a tired sigh.

Not that he was complaining at all. His breath had certainly been taken away though, heart picking up in pace.

“How you feeling?” Glancing up to him, Sunghoon asked, obviously referring to his anxiety. Voice so gentle and comforting. Jake smiled down to him.

“Much better now you’re here.” A bright red coated the Australians face as he said those words, not really knowing what compelled him to say it. It was almost like instinct! He wasn’t lying of course, he felt much more content now his friend was cuddled up to him. The younger smiled widely, looking away instead to Jake’s laptop with his assignments on the screen, before whispering out a quiet ‘cute’. The Aussie felt his cheeks heat up.

“What you doing?” Eyes scanning over the bundles of work. Narrowing at the first question, not understanding a single thing in that sentence full of formulas and symbols. Jake groaned, leaning back a little, careful not to shift too much for Sunghoon’s sake.

“Trying to do my physics work. I’ve got absolutely nothing done in the last hours.” Sighing, still peering annoyingly at his empty answer boxes. Sunghoon hummed in response, moving away from Jake a little as he shuffled forward to pick up a work sheet. How the hell Jake understood any of this was beyond him. Furrowing his eyebrows, he got a headache just looking at all the formulas.

“I still have no idea why you would take maths AND physics! That’s surely some type of self harm. Are you okay?.” He groans, placing the paper back down. The blonde laughed at the statement. It was definitely a lot of work, but he was naturally good at the subjects and excelled at them greatly compared to everything else. Especially now living in Korea, where his writing and reading wasn’t that good, subjects with a lot of literature would be very difficult.

“It’s fun when you understand it.” He shrugged.

The reply earned a scoff from Sunghoon, falling back onto the couch back again, the twos shoulders now meeting. His heart rate continued to increase.

“Okay, nerd.” He joked, a grin appearing on his lips. Jake pouted, playfully whacking his friends arm.

“I’m not a nerd!” He sulked, although couldn’t help a smile from breaking out on his lips as he watched Sunghoon laugh. The sound always made him smile, loving the way his roommate’s face lit up. Displaying his perfect set of teeth and fangs.

“Jakey, anyone who can understand this is a complete nerd.” He said between breaks of laughter, earning yet another whack on his arm, this time much harder as he whined in pain.

“You’re talking to a future rocket scientist, you know! I’ll shove you onto the rocket and send you to space without a helmet if you’re not careful.” He threatened, still giggling as his friend who seemed only more amused.

He wrapped an arm round Jake’s shoulder, pulling him into a side hug again. This time, Jake’s head rested on his shoulder, as the taller placed his own ontop. Soon calming his laughs, grinning at the pout on the blonde’s lips. Who’s heart was currently doing laps around his body, he was certain Sunghoon could see the blush on his cheeks!

Gosh why did he have to get so flustered at everything Sunghoon did, he didn’t act like this with the others. And Jake was always touchy!

After a moment, Sunghoon’s voice was semi serious as he questioned.

“Do you actually want to be a rocket scientist?” Pulling away a little, staring towards Jake who met his eyes. He practically wanted to start cackling at the seriousness in Sunghoon’s eyes, that he had taken his joke to heart. He was so adorable.

“God no Hoon, I was just getting you to shut up.” He said, breaking out into giggles as the other sheepishly looked away. “Dumbass.” He whispered. However there was no malicious intent, his tone even making it seem like an endearment, a light hearted jab at the other.

“Yeah that makes sense, the nerd and the dumbass.” Sunghoon replied. “A great duo.”

“YAH! Shut up I’m not a nerd!” He yelled in protest, getting ready to practically tackle Sunghoon into the floor.

Laughs and giggles continued to erupt from the small apartment, as the two joked and teased eachother endlessly throughout the night. Jake’s cheeks hurt from practically smiling for hours on end. The warm and fuzzy feeling was so comforting, a feeling he only got with Sunghoon and a feeling he wished would never stop. He was endlessly happy he had got to meet his roommate, who knew how long it would’ve taken them to cross paths if they didn’t move in. He really didn’t want to know the answer to that question. He almost felt complete while with the other.
It was only their 4th week of living together, yet Jake felt like he had known the younger for years.

He would trade this for nothing, as he stared at the boy next to him, eyes crinkled and a stunning smile on his lips.

This was definitely home.

_____

Stress and worry had consumed Jake’s mind as he stared outside his window. No, he wasn’t left alone. Just the usual worrying that everyone went through. Fear about assignments and grades, fatigue from busy schedules. His energy had been low, not even bothering to reply to Sunghoon as he greeted him today. He felt bad about it though, even though the latter didn’t seem to take it to heart. However, he still felt guilty. He didn’t like when he got distant to people. But he needed the break every now and then.

Sighing to himself, he watched the busy streets below, and above the beautiful sunset was perfectly in sight. Being on the 3rd floor maybe wasn’t so bad after all. The views were calming and peaceful, Jake eyes followed as people went on with their daily lives. Alone, or walking and laughing with friends. Stern business men, elderly couples with their arms linked, mothers with their children skipping along side.

He smiled, the last one reminding himself and his original home in Australia. Suddenly, he longed to go back, an empty feeling in his stomach.

He missed skipping down the hot streets, as his mother would walk him back home from his soccer practices when he was only 8 years old. Telling him to slow down and watch where he was going as he would crash into almost anyone that was in his path. The familiar streets he grew up on, where everyone seemed to know eachother.

His mind was interrupted with a gentle knocking at his door, Sunghoon entered, shoes on his feet and the hood of his jacket over his head. With a slight smile he asked.

“Care for a walk?”

And that’s how he found himself on the streets he was idly staring at minutes ago, hand brushing against his friend’s beside him. Their paces matched, the only sounds being the bustling sounds of the city around them.

Once again, Jake was left completely star-struck by how well Sunghoon knew him. Knowing what he needed, and knowing right now he didn’t want to talk. He appreciates his presence, the bumping of their hands and arms setting a gentle reminder he was still there.

He wasn’t sure where they were headed, opting to just mimic the younger’s steps as they passed through the now calming streets. Many people already arriving home after the busy day of work or school. The fresh smell of street food being packed up for the night, flooded his scent.

Glancing upwards, the beautiful paining of the sky on full showcase. Clouds had the beautiful tint of orange and yellow from the setting sun. Pinks blended so perfectly into the mix. This was definitely one of Jake’s favourite sights, eyes lighting up in admiration.

Far too distracted by the pleasant sky, he was pulled gently to the side by Sunghoon as he was about to crash into a passbyer. Face flushing a little pink, his apologised to the person and thanked Hoon shyly. Who smiled and laughed sweetly in return.

The worries from earlier evaporated like nothing.

As the two continued to walk, their hands continued to etch closer. Resting against eachother’s for the majority of the walk. Jake felt his heart beat subtly, as Sunghoon cautiously linked their pinkies together. Glancing up to the other, he smiled softly as the taller kept his gaze straight ahead, cheeks dusted pink. Matching Jake’s.

The pair soon entered what seemed to be a public park, colour flower beds resting on the floor, large plains of semi-empty grass, an occasional person or two sitting down. He followed Sunghoon, who casually sat down a good distance away from anybody else. He took a seat next to him, pinkies still latched together. A peaceful silence remained, knowing the moment didn’t need any words right now. It was just the comforting echoes of birds above and gentle gushes of wind through his ears.

Butterflies flew around his stomach, as Sunghoon now instead placed his hand full in Jake’s. He took it upon himself, to lace their fingers together. A breathtaking smile never leaving his lips, as he continued to gaze at the beautiful sky above him. It got darker around them as the sun passed further down the tall city buildings. Lights from apartments, neon signs, logos all flashing calmly in the new darkness. It was strange, how every small light in the distance belonged to someone else. A different story and person, with different experiences and lives.

Euphoria.

Jake felt as his hand was tightly intertwined with the boy’s next to him. In complete adoration for the view before him. He naturally leant his head onto Sunghoon’s shoulder, eyes still fixated infront of him. Clueless that the boy beside him spent the whole time, admiring a different beauty instead, stars in his eyes.

The light soon vanished to complete darkness, the only reason for sight being the lampposts near by. Stars now coated the midnight sky, twinkling like they were the protectors of Earth. The two began to steadily head back home on the near-empty streets.

He glanced beside him to see Sunghoon offering him an earbud to which he happily accepted, a large smile as he placed in it his ear. He indulged in Sunghoon’s music taste. The songs not being ballad or sad, but not upbeat or extra. He seemed to pick ones that perfectly fit the mood. The slow yet mind stimulating vibes, with gentle and soft vocals. Pure bliss.

He almost didn’t want to go home, to stay wandering the quiet streets with his friend forever. Unfortunately his job and sunghoon’s lectures prevented that from happening. He still remained impossibly appreciative though, glad he got to experience this with his roommate. Glad he managed to rid him of his nerves once again, he always did.

Much to his dismay, their hands sadly disconnected as Sunghoon had to reach for the key inside his pocket to open the door. The warmth inside contrasting to the cold breeze of outside. Jake felt a wave of tiredness wash over him as the two stepped inside. He paused at his door, which was first to pass.

“Thank you, Hoonie.” He said the nickname with certainty, offering said male a grateful smile. Sunghoon smiled widely at the name, bringing his hand up to ruffle his hair. His usual type of affection.

“No problem Jakey, I thought you could need a distraction.”

The usual giddy feeling was even stronger, listening to his words. He couldn’t begin to express his gratitude to his friend.

“I really did.”

“I’m glad it helped. Sleep well, goodnight.” Sunghoon bid, the usual affection laced in his words. Before he began to retreat into his own room. Jake smiled to himself, as he opened his door and fell backwards onto his bed. Hands on either side of his flushed face. He felt warm.

He rested well that night, the best rest he had gotten since he moved here.

____ (I feel like I’m jumping around so much but I’m so bad at transitioning😭)

Movie nights every now and again seemed to become the regular between the roommates. Somehow finding themselves flushed against eachother as they watch the screen infront of them, making random comments or jokes about the show. A lot of the time they seemed to fall engrossed into the movie. Jake definitely being the more vocal one as he expresses his anger, sadness or happiness at certain characters actions. Flailing his arms which resulted in Sunghoon being hit one too many times for his liking. Each time Jake apologised, it was clearly very insincere as he would be holding back his laugh. But it was the words that mattered not the actions! Hold on-

Anyway, per usual routine, the pair were sat on the couch. The blonde leaning onto his friends shoulder, while Sunghoon had an arm wrapped round his neck. The elder’s mind was currently distracted, as the words from Jay he heard previously rattled in his mind. It was weird to think that Sunghoon wasn’t touchy with anyone else like this, Jay sure seemed mind boggled. The two had acted like this between one another practically since they met. Furrowing his eyebrows, the sound from the movie had now completely blurred out into the background.

He assumed the other just had a change in heart! Everyone can adapt after all, it only seemed natural as Jake was a touchy person. He was probably just catering to him, Sunghoon was a selfless guy after all. Yet now he thought back, the previous two times the pair had been round their friends, he was never affectionate unlike himself. Brushing it off once again, he probably just never had the opportunity to!

Oh how oblivious he was.

Trying to focus back on the movie, Jake now had absolutely no idea what was going on as he shifted a little. He wasn’t enjoying this much anymore, there wasn’t enough fast scenes to be stimulating his brain to focus. Accepting that he was utterly lost, Jake’s eyes darted around the living room.

He really liked how it looked, the colours of everything was pleasing to look at it as they blended nicely together. He felt even more thankful to have his roommate all of a sudden. While in his mind, he looked over to the mentioned male, face sternly concentrated on the TV. Jake assumed something important was happening yet had no care in the world as he stared at the more amusing sight.

While examining Sunghoon’s sharp features, his eyes naturally fell down to his plush lips. They were full and pink, much like the rest of his face, they were perfect too. They seemed soft, much contrasting to Jake’s own chapped ones due to his bad habit of continuously biting on them. As he stared in a daze, the sudden urge to kiss him overcame Jake’s mind. He hated to admit, but he had definitely had that thought before. It wasn’t his fault his roommate was godly attractive, it was only natural. He thought. He hoped it was natural. Maybe it definitely wasn’t- Pink painted his face again, trying to rid his mind of the stupid thoughts. The hell was he thinking of kissing his friend!?

However, realising that Sunghoon was indeed right next to him, he caught onto the piercing gaze from the boy beside him, feeling holes being drilled into his face, he turned his eyes to Jake. Said male immediately looked away, cheeks flushed completely red. He felt that if they got any hotter you’d practically see steam coming from them. It was obvious to Sunghoon’s amusement that he was flustered.

Great now I just got caught staring, how fun!

The feeling of eyes on him still remained as he glared with a new found passion at the TV, not daring to spare an eye at Sunghoon for the rest of the night. After a few seconds, he heard a subtle chuckle next to him, he could practically hear the shit eating grin across his roommate’s lips. He couldn’t feel more embarrassed then right at that moment, heart beating loudly. Mentally preparing for the bombardments of teasing.

However, Jake thanked every god in existence as Sunghoon didn’t mention the staring for the rest of the night. Sparing Jake of the relentless teasing for one day. Despite this, he became extra clingy though, he wasn’t sure if that was a form of teasing or not. He often got pulled closer to his roommate, his heart not catching a rest as he ran his hand over his arm.

He practically sighed in relief as he escaped to his bedroom after finishing the movie and bidding his roommate goodnight. Crashing down into his bed at last, he stared blankly at the boring ceiling above his head. Various thoughts muddled through his brain as he tried to comprehend his own feelings for once. Something he was never good at, or thought was never important enough to think about.

How he ended up getting flustered at everything Sunghoon did was causing a big internal issue within Jake’s mind. How his heart beat faster when the taller boy would wrap an innocent arm around his waist. How his heart hammered not with anxiety but something else as Sunghoon held him close after he suffered an anxiety attack.
Shying away and blushing at every compliment Sunghoon flew his way. How he secretly adored their height difference despite complaining about it. How he so badly wanted to see how his lips would feel against his.

The utter euphoria he felt as they two held hands while star gazing as the sun descended above them. That day was special to Jake, his heart swelling at the thought. The beautiful fresh night, Sunghoon’s shoulder brushed against his. Comfort he had never felt with anyone before. Soft echoing of his roommate’s favourite songs in the shared ear buds as they walked home, still hand in hand. The grasp soft but firm.

It was ridiculous he hadn’t noticed it sooner, he knew what all the signs meant. He wasn’t stupid by any means. As his heart was still rushing in his chest, he finally admit it to himself.

Fucking hell I have a crush on my roommate.

On some level he probably always knew. Just never having the time to sit down and properly think over his emotions till now. With Sunghoon, it wasn’t sudden and unexpected. Now he thought back, it seemed like this was always meant to happen from the day they met. The two had immediately clicked and only became closer since then. The subtle touches turning frequent, Sunghoon’s sweet and attentive nature. He never failed to take care of Jake. Unfortunately, he was now only going to fall deeper from here, into the loop and heartbreak of unrequited love.

Sexuality was always a struggle for the Australian growing up. Who didn’t struggle with such a thing? Always feeling out of place and awkward. Not wanting to be different and battling waves of internalised homophobia. Standing out, is something he’s never wanted to do. Begging to always fit in and be unnoticed by everyone around him. To go on with life uninterrupted, It was more peaceful that way. As time progressed though, it became harder to deny who he liked. He didn’t know exactly what he was, but he knew with everything inside him that he was definitely not straight.

Jaeyun laid in bed frustrated, roughly placing his hands on either side of his overheated cheeks, hoping to cool them down with the cold touch. There was no way in hell he was catching feelings for Park Sunghoon. Well, it’s not like liking him was a bad thing. He wasn’t a trouble maker by any sorts. In fact he was responsible, caring, he definitely gave the best hugs….His smile was so pure and he charms everyone wherever he goes! The little things he does to make sure he’s okay and secure. He’s never held judgement against Jake. He would definitely be a good boyfr-

Agh shut up!!!

Jake frustratingly rose from his bed, needing to clear his mind of these thoughts. He couldn’t like Sunghoon! He was his roommate, it would only make things more difficult and awkward between them. The last thing he wanted to do was cause an unsettling tension between the two, for god knows how long they’ll be living together! Worst of all, he didn’t want to ruin their friendship. He had never gotten on so well with someone before, he truly felt like he and Hoon were really meant to be together in some way. A friendship way, of course.

His sudden outburst to the kitchen where he went to aggressively drink water, mustve caught the attention of Sunghoon in the next room, because before he knew it, he too was standing in the room a metre away from himself.

“Are you alright Jakey?” His voice spoke in a soft tone.

Damn you Park Sunghoon.

The fact that Sunghoon was clearly, extremely, handsome and extremely kind, was not good for Jake’s heart. At all. Especially not now, as he felt the raventte’s strong glare right on his face as they stood in the kitchen. Gosh, he was practically peering daggers into him! He came in here to escape those thoughts of having a crush on his attractive roommate, that clearly failed.

He suddenly wanted the ground to swallow him up whole, as he felt the cause of his issues to step ever so lightly towards him. Yup. He definitely wanted to leave this situation right now. He wondered if jumping out the window would be a good idea. Despite the three story drop.

“Jakey?” He said again soothingly. He was so close, too close, arm brushing against Jake’s own which only increased his body temperature.

“Uhm- yeah I’m fine, sorry, you can go back to bed.” He stuttered, firmly keeping his gaze to the half empty glass of water infront of him. Water had never been so interesting before.

He heard a small chuckle bedside him, his heart being sent into a beating frenzy.
Then a gentle touch to his cheek and chin, as Sunghoon tilted Jake’s head towards him, catching his eyes.

The elder was internally panicking, questioning what the hell was happening as he swallowed harshly, gazing idly into Sunghoon’s eyes. He couldn’t quite describe them, dark yet still glittering despite the lack of lighting right at that moment. He couldn’t figure it out.

He blushed furiously as Sunghoon was mere inches away from him, holding his face ever so gently. He fought every urge inside him to not look down to his lips.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He whispered, sincerity lacing in the words. Jake remained silent, completely taken aback. Noticing Jake’s crisis, he spoke again.

“I really make you flustered, don’t I?” He asked, a playful smirk on his face, those adorable fangs peaking out too.

Jake hardly even processed the questions, he could feel his heart in the back of his throat, and was way more concerned about the non stop burning of his cheeks. At this rate they were going to burn off! He remained silent, unable to form a response to the younger as he diverted his gaze away, refusing to meet his eyes.

Sunghoon laughed, before finally removing his hand and taking a step away.

“Hey, what’s so funny!?” Jake yelled after him, as the boy began walking out the kitchen.

“Nothing, you’re just cute, Jaeyun-ah.” He called back teasingly, raising his hand as he retreated back into his room, leaving a dumbfounded and extremely flustered Jake in centre of the kitchen. Questioning what the hell just happened. He almost wanted to chase after Sunghoon, but what would he even ask him?

Now knowing the answer himself, he gulped down the rest of his water to hopefully cool himself down somewhat. He could feel the traces of Sunghoon’s fingers on his face as he slapped his own hand over his cheek. Groaning to himself, he waddled back into his room, to now contemplate his crush on his friend once again.

After a few hours of internal stress, Jake had agreed to lock his feelings up in a box and deal with the ever growing issues when it all explodes. The greatest coping strategy of all! He knew he had been obvious with his flustered state but not to the point where Sunghoon himself would point it out. He really hoped he wouldn’t catch onto his crush.

He managed to fall asleep after some time, relaxing into the comfort of his bed sheets, trying to keep his mind clear of distractions. He was sure he’d get over Sunghoon eventually.

The night went quick, Jake getting the relief of sleeping in as he was free of work and lectures on Saturdays. The only day of the week he could relax fully. After a well deserved lay in, he pulled himself from bed, aiming for something to clench his hunger. Stomach rumbling at the thought of food. As he stumbled out his room, blanket still wrapped round his shoulders to shield from the cold, his roommate sat on the couch. Laptop placed infront of him as he seemed to be working hard on an assignment.

Sunghoon always woke up before Jake, seeming much more of a morning person than the blonde. He always preferred to stay up late and wake up later, something comforting in the silent hours of the dark hours. No one to bother or disturb him as he slept or worked on his piling homework. He could never manage to stay on top of it these days, which was very unlike him. He proposed, it had something to do with the male who now turned back to look at him after noticing Jake enter the room.

He smiled softly towards him.

“I made you a coffee, it’s in the kitchen.” Gaze returning to his laptop.

Okay, maybe I’m never getting over him.

Smiling at the considerate action, he thanked Sunghoon before making his way to the kitchen, taking a sip of the carefully made coffee. The perfect amount of milk and sugar. Not being bothered to cook anything, he resulted in eating cereal. Quick and easy, perfect for lazy uni students. Bowl in hand, he sat down next to his friend, remaining silent as he worked on his assignment. He assumed the boy had been awake for some hours, many paragraphs already completed on the word document.

Sunghoon acknowledged his presence, bumping his leg into Jake’s. A simple gesture, but was enough for the moment. Jaeyun should definitely be spending the day catching up on his work too, yet feeling the motivation to do none of that whatsoever. He would be alone tonight, so it would be pretty hard to get it done then. Yet he seemed too engrossed in doing nothing. For now, he pulled his phone out his sweatpants pocket and scrolled on social media after finishing his food.

Sunghoon groaned aloud, eyes narrowing frustratingly at his screen. He tapped his fingers on the side of his computer, stuck on what word to use.

“You alright man?” Jake asked, glancing from the laptop back over to his friend.

“Every word in existence has left my mind.” He sighed, eyes not leaving the screen full of text, the typing cursor blinking at him mockingly. The elder snorted, leaning back into the couch, phone automatically switching off.

“Maybe cause you’ve been writing for hours non stop,” He observed. “take a short break, I’m sure it’ll come back to you.” He reassured, waving a hand towards him. The raventte sighed, running a hand through his hair and holding it out his eyes for a few seconds. Displaying his ethereal side profile as he leant forward to save his current progress of work. Jake felt his heart skip a beat at the small action, quickly looking away, refusing to let himself get flustered again.

He literally just pushed his hair back, what’s wrong with you?!

He hated to admit how down back he was becoming for his friend.

“I guess you’re right Jakey.” He agreed, turning to face the Australian, shifting his body a little to his direction. “Sleep well?” He asks, resting his head onto his hand.

“Yeah, thanks…” He answered, fiddling with his hands in his lap shyly.

As well as I could after you decided to tease the hell out of me! You have any idea what you do to my heart?

Oh, how he wished he could say that right to his friends face. However not really wanting an awkward conversation first thing on his weekend. Only a night after his semi-realisation of his crush. He was still dumbfounded as to how he didn’t think about that sooner.

Upon hearing his roommate chuckle, he glanced back over to him. Tilting his head in curiosity into what was so entertaining. Sunghoon’s eyes only seemed to crinkle more at that, smiling sickly sweetly.

“Have you been told you look just like a puppy?”

For a matter of fact he had been told that. On so many occasions that it didn’t seem to phase him anymore. A ‘golden retriever vibe’ people would say. While Jake kind of understood what they meant, he also didn’t. How did he resemble a dog?! Was it even a compliment. Yet as the words escaped from Sunghoon’s lips with so much endearment, he felt his cheeks heat up, red rushing to his neck. It surely felt like a compliment now.

“I have. Many times, I don’t see it!” He pouted, trying to keep his face away from Sunghoon’s line of sight. He laughed is disbelief, bringing a hand into the blonde’s fluffy hair. Dark roots coming through the dyed blonde. The colour of his hair definitely added more fuel to the golden retriever agenda.

“How do you not? I can practically see your ears flopping right now.” He joked, peering closer to Jake. The wide smile not leaving his face, hand continuing to stroke through his hair. The elder felt himself melting into the touch, however still pouting. Sparing Sunghoon a glance for the first time.

“That’s not funny! Is it even a compliment?” He questioned aloud. He suddenly felt a little upset as Sunghoon removed his hand, still giggling at his misery.

“It’s definitely a compliment, Jake, don’t worry, it’s cute.”

Cute. His heart skipped another beat as the red travelled to his ears in embarrassment, now fully turning his head away from his roommate.

“You’re such a tease.” He mumbled with a scoff, sulking at his friends unfair actions. This only caused another cackle to erupt throughout the room.

“Yeah.” He said, voice hushing down now into a softer tone. “I think you’re my favourite to tease.”

Jake’s heart had definitely stopped.

Sunghoon had began to get back working on his assignment, despite how much his mind wanted a rest, Jake knew he should work on his own homework too. Heading back to his room to study there instead. As much as he’d love to work side by side Sunghoon, Jake was very aware of his own mind. And knowing his mind well meant knowing it would get distracted at every little thing the younger did. He would get absolutely nothing done!

After hours of non stop working on equations and formulas, Jake’s brain was fried. Feeling himself get a pulsing headache after staring at his computer screen for hours. Hand to his head, he finally exit the room. The living room was empty as he crashed down onto the couch, hand still firmly on his forehead to reduce the ache. He didn’t bother to look up as the sound of Sunghoon’s door opened and shuffling around him. Eyes still scrunched tightly together in discomfort. He knew his roommate was probably getting ready to go to work again, making him sigh aloud.

He removed his hand and opened his eyes as he felt a presence hovering above him. The younger was perched over the back of the grey sofa, hand coming to press at his forehead where his own hand had been resting. Pushing his hair away from his sight too.

“There’s tablets in the cupboard.” He hummed, feeling how hot Jake’s head was at his touch. Burning up worse the longer he kept it there. Despite the kind gesture, he was only increasing the blonde’s body temperature instead. Who could only nod timidly in response. Sunghoon pulled away his touch, pushing himself off the couch’s back. “I’ve gotta go now, you’ll be okay?”

Despite this being the third time Jake was going to be alone after his panic attack, Sunghoon remained anxious to leave him all alone at home. Especially as he would gets scared from Jake expressing his paranoia as he awaited him to come home. Eyes filled with solitude, he scanned over Jaeyun’s face.

“Mhmmm”. Humming, not being bothered to say much else. Sunghoon not impressed by the vague response as he furrowed his eyebrows towards him. “I’ll be okay Hoonie.” He reassured when he noticed the other’s solemn expression. Rolling his eyes, he leant over to mess with Jake’s hair one more time.

“I’ll message you like normal, call me if you need me.” Shooting a sad smile before leaving the house, Sunghoon leaving Jake to himself all again.

Whining about his still pestering headache, Jake still couldn’t be bothered to get up and get medicine. Far too submerged into the fluffy cushions and warmth of the blankets. He closed his eyes again, hoping he would be able to drift back into sleep. Despite the pain and mental strain he was just about to receive as his safety net had left the apartment. He swallowed nervously as little sound around him became extra loud.

The wind from outside lightly banging on the windows, the agitating tick of the clock on the wall he never seemed to notice until he was alone. He assumed his hearing got heightened the moment he was alone, due to his severely high paranoia. Heart beat also painfully obvious in his ear drums, crawling up his throat.

Sudden frequent vibrations from the table next to him distracted his mind for a second, not only seeing his messages from Sunghoon, but more coming through in a group chat he was.

The elder guys in the friend group had their own group chat. Consisting of Heeseung, Jay, Jake and Sunghoon. After replying to the check ins from Sunghoon, he opened up the messages from Heeseung in the group chat.

From: Heeseung Hyung 👴

‘Party at xxxxxxxx on Thursday, who’s coming? Seems like it’ll be fun👍👍
Messaging here, not letting the youngins attend this one’

Jake audibly laughed at the message, Heeseung had such an old way of typing it was almost endearing.

‘Man a Thursday night? I’ve got work early morning Fridays, no can do ):’

Despite the frowny face he just used, he was more than delighted he wouldn’t be able to attend. A large room full of sweaty, drunk teenagers wasn’t really his thing. Often feeling overwhelmed by the masses of people. While Jake didn’t like being alone, it surely didn’t mean he liked to be completely surrounded in a hot, overcrowded room with music so loud he’d be deaf at the end of the night.

From: Jay 🇺🇸🦅

‘I’ll be there, been craving something exciting and I’ll drag Sunghoon along wether he likes it or not’

From: Hoon 😊

‘Hey! I didn’t sign up for this! this is against my personal rights. C’mon dude arent you from the freedom country?’

Jake snorted at the message, placing a hand over his mouth.

‘LMAOOO’

From: Jay 🇺🇸🦅

‘Dont remember where I asked 🤣
You’re coming , you haven’t had fun in ages’

From: Hoon 😊

‘fine whatever 🙄🙄👎👎’

‘Shouldn’t you be working Hoon? Get off your phone !’

From: Hoon 😊

‘Wow way to snitch Jakey 🤧🤧
ohfuckthe manager ijlbrbgusy’

Shaking his head, he smiled. Closing off his phone and placing it on his chest as he retorted to zoning out. Nothing right now was entertaining enough. Not wanting to turn the TV on incase the sound covered up something important. By important he means the ridiculous scenario that someone was trying to break into his house. Not that the sound of a TV could possible block the vibrations and crash of a door being broke after all. But, this was irrational after all.

Unfortunately, with nothing to stimulate his brain from his thoughts, the frightful dread began catching up to Jake. Chest returning to an all so familiar scene of feeling compressed. He thought he felt like this so often, it was basically becoming his default. In fact he couldn’t remember the last time his heart wasn’t beating like crazy, wether that was due to his anxiety or the effect of his roommate. The latter was definitely more bearable though.

He wasn’t in an active state of panic or having difficulty breathing at this stage, but the intense feeling inside of him wasn’t pleasant either. As he began to long for Sunghoon to come home and make it all go away. He placed his hands on either side of his head, harshly closing his eyes. Moving his fingers in circular motions to try ease the pounding headache which seemed to be increasing to a migraine instead.

Overwhelmed by the now boisterous sounds around him. The soft ticking of the clock was now blaring in his ears instead. As the distress continued to chip away at him. He feared, Sunghoon hadn’t been long at all. Probably hardly breaking an hour since he left for his shift. Nor did he know how long his shift was going to be today. The fact he had reached this stage of uneasiness already, he wasn’t sure how he’d cope for the next long hours.

Opening his eyes with apprehension, he sat up. Taking deep breaths while reassuring his mind he was safe and okay. Reaching for his phone with a slight tremble in his hands, he opened his direct messages to Sunghoon. He didn’t plan on writing anything, not wanting to concern him. Just keeping it open to reread the sweet messages, and to be there as soon as new ones came through.

Against his intentions, backreading only made Jake feel the urge to have him here even more.

What If he wasn’t coming home?

I’m going to be alone here for hours.

What was that sound?

Why is it so noisy outside?

What if someone is there?

Roughly biting down on his bottom lip, he didn’t even realise he desperately rung Sunghoon’s contact, until his ever so gentle voice echoed through the line.

“Jakey? Are you okay?” He asked, before he could reply there was muttering along the line, Sunghoon seeming to be talking to someone, an annoyed tone in his voice before it went back to silence, just the slight cracklings from the call. “Jaeyun?”

“I’m.” He tried to speak, not sure what to say. He wasn’t fine, yet he felt himself etching at saying that. He didn’t want to drag Sunghoon home from work, he’d probably get scolded by his manager for it, and missing out on some of his pay. “I’m okay.” He whispered, trying to stabilised his shaky voice. It seemed to no avail though.

“Are you sure?” Jake felt his heart ease a little upon hearing his voice in real time, voice alleviating and calm.

“Are you coming home..tonight?” Ignoring the question, he let himself ask the question that was causing such distress in his mind. He heard a soft chuckle sound across the line.

“Of course I am. I hope this isn’t you calling to tell me I’m kicked out.” He joked, which made Jake smiley subtly. Appreciating how lighthearted Sunghoon made everything. Even while feeling nothing but dread, he managed to subdue that, even a little.

“No it’s not…” He whispered back, he cursed himself as his voice cracked through the speech. He felt himself tearing up for some reason. Which was ironic as he felt himself calming. There was silence for a moment, shuffling could be heard in the background before Sunghoon spoke again.

“Jake, do you need me to come home?” This time, his voice was firm. He didn’t seem annoyed if that were the case, purely just wanting to make sure his roommate was okay and safe. Tears began to trickle down Jake’s face, sniffling before replying.

“No, it’s okay- it’s fine, I’m fine.” He lied, speech fast and uncertain. He really, really, wanted Sunghoon to come home. Not sure how much longer he could take with the feeling of nothingness. A quiet sigh could be heard across the line. The phone going silent as the mumbling from before sounded. Jake couldn’t make out what any of the voices were saying as he anxiously bit his lip.

“I’m coming home, I won’t be long, okay? Don’t worry.”

Before he could have the time to protest, the line went dead as the beeping hit his ears. He looked down at his phone, ended call screen in his face. He felt guilt as he caused Sunghoon to come home from work, yet, the relief overpowered that by a landslide. Internally grateful for all the things Sunghoon had done for him, wether that was catering to his anxiety or simply being kind.

The times he had taken Jake to work or university when he had free days off. Memorising his sleep schedule and making a coffee for him multiple times just as he had woken up. Buying his favourite ramen from the store when Jake had complained they ran out. Sitting in silence when he knew Jake needed space. How his eyes never seemed to leave Jake the few times they went out with their friends, joint to his hip. From planning to take Jake ice skating when they had free time, upon knowing how much he wanted to see him skate in person. To just smiling at him when he felt down.
He felt undeserving of the care and attention.

Jake’s heart swelled, his body becoming lax as he pieces together all the things he adored about Sunghoon. All the things he could to make up for his care. He pieces together his emotions.

Even right now in that moment, as he hurried to open the door and make his way to Jake. Who’s tears seemed to stream and stream everlastingly. This time not in fear, but pure gratification to someone who’s done so much for him.

No wonder he was falling in love.

He stumbled his way over to Sunghoon, in the middle of the room, as he hugged him tightly. Strong, firm arms immediately held him back. Not even resisting for a second, like it was nature. He gripped tightly back, before backing away a little, looking into his friends eyes. Heart breaking a little as he knew that’s all they’ll ever be. He hoped, the younger’s future girlfriend appreciated him as much as he did right then.

“I don’t think I’ve ever thanked you enough, Hoonie.” He ushered, cheeks heating up as Sunghoon wiped away the oncoming tears on his face. Gently holding his face, smiling down at his roommate. Eyes turning to the prettiest crescents he’s ever seen.

“You don’t need to thank me. I’m home now, don’t cry, you’ll make me cry.” He laughed gently, removing his hand from his face and pulling Jake into a hug once again. Nuzzling into his hair, exhaling in relief. Glad that Jaeyun was content in his arms. He always wanted him to be there, where he could protect him from everything that hurt the fragile boy. Jake’s heart beat steadily, warmth spreading throughout him.

It’s been 5 weeks, but I think I’m already almost in love with you, Park Sunghoon.

After a few more moments, the raventte led the two onto the couch, switching on the TV and placing a series the two had been watching together. Jake was resting atop of the other, head placed on his chest as he semi-watched the screen. The other half of his focus being on the hand playing with his hair gently. However, he hated how he knew he would never be able to stop himself from resisting these touches. As much as he needed to, to stop his feelings from escalating too far. He didn’t want to aimlessly wait around for heartbreak. Certain that Sunghoon would definitely have people pursuing him. Who wouldn’t?

Yet as he was engulfed into the trance that was park Sunghoon, he never wanted to leave. Cause he still made him feel special, and treated him better than anyone else had before. He was reassured that Sunghoon would always come home to him. He knew this now, for sure. As he laid in his embrace, he felt like he could finally overcome his phobia. Knowing that his roommate would always be the light after the tunnel. No matter how much anxiety he went through, he was worth the wait and more.

He felt himself smiling, as for the first time he felt some certainty, that his anxiety wouldn’t continue to ruin his life forever. With Sunghoon by his side, he’d break through it all. Nuzzling into the said male’s hold further, he closed his eyes.

Maybe loving him wasn’t so bad after all. He would cope with the heartbreak when it came to it. Right now, he didn’t seem to care.

_____
(am I skipping time again? Yes 😭)

As the days continued to go on, Jake’s speculation that his anxiety would ease up was definitely right. Of course it wasn’t drastic, it’s not like his phobia magically disappeared. He would still feel on edge and fidgety, yet he felt a lot more at ease. Knowing Sunghoon would soon be coming home to him. Actually physically able to get on with his work while left alone, always feeling better at Sunghoon’s frequent messages. Telling the most random stories of his childhood or crying about his manager, it ranged from absolutely anything that Jake always anticipated the next text. His cheeks aching from smiling so often.

He had also met Sunghoon’s little sister, on the one time that she came to visit. Insisting that she just wanted to snoop around her brother’s room, not at all that she missed him at home. She resembled Sunghoon a lot, moles even in the same places. They even acted the same in their stubborn behaviour and teasing. He laughed as they bickered throughout the day, usual sibling rivalry. He got on well with her, the night even ending with her insisting. “Why couldn’t Jake be my brother instead.” In to which he had to comfort Sunghoon about it. Laughing at his reaction, knowing he’s said the same thing about his elder brother many times. “She doesn’t really mean it, Hoonie.”

Things began to run smoothly again, and he couldn’t be more relieved about it. Even as Thursday night came round the corner quickly. Normally we would freak out that he was being left alone for even longer than usual. With the fact that Sunghoon was going to the party with Heeseung and Jay. Yet he didn’t feel too fearful, knowing he would be okay. However not looking forward to a drunk Sunghoon waltzing through the door and whatever time he planned to come home.

Jake’s heart had practically stopped beating once he saw Sunghoon’s outfit for the night, having to stop his mouth from falling open and gaping at how attractive he was. He was suddenly devastated that he couldn’t attend the party. Certainly wanting to look at this Sunghoon all night. His face flushed as he looked over at him.

He wore a white dress shirt, the top few buttons undone. Resting ontop was a black jacket, a blazer like look, with graphic letters on the sleeves. While they were rolled slightly to showcase the shirt underneath. Which had the sleeves folded over too. A pretty belt secured on semi-fit black trousers, and combat boots on his feet. To finish the look off, a chain necklace hung from his neck, while another with a cross in the centre rested across his neck instead. A silver earring dangling from his ear.

Jaeyun was for sure dead, and for sure wanting to ending it all knowing he couldn’t come due to his early shift. Jungwon would actually have him dead if he bailed. Or turned up with a hangover.

“What, do I look bad?” Sunghoon questioned upon noticing his roommate ogling him from across the room. Jake immediately stuttered, tearing his gaze away in a panic to reassure the other, he looked the complete opposite of ‘bad’.

“Nono! Not at all, you look really nice.” He answered quickly, feeling incredibly flustered as he heard his friend come closer, doing his usual thing of leaning against the back of the couch.

“Thanks Yunie, I’ll take your word for it.” He grinned, and Jake felt himself levitate at the nickname. The fact it was a play on his Korean name, and no one else had called him that before. While Jakey was a pretty generic name most people called him. It only enhanced his emotions of feeling special to Sunghoon.

“The others are outside so I’ll head out now, please still call me if you need me.” He pouted, leaning further over the couch to poke Jake’s heated cheeks. Who only shyly batted the hand anyway.

“I’ll be fine Hoon! Go enjoy your night.” He reassured, however it didn’t seem like enough for Sunghoon still, pout still on his pretty lips.

“You said that the last time.” He observed. Jake sighed, running a hand through his own hair.

“I say it everytime. I know I had a bad day a few days ago, but I’ve been fine for, what 3 times now? I pinky promise I’ll be just fine.” Raising a hand, pinky extended as he waited for Sunghoon’s to connect his own. Said male laughed at the childish gesture, latching their fingers together and squeezing.

“You’re the cutest, Yunie.” He spoke, pulling his hand away and enjoying the sight of his flustered friend, face painted red. “I’ll see you later.” He bids goodbye before finally leaving the apartment. Allowing the tension in the air to die down and Jake to actually breathe!

How many times has he called me cute now?

He contemplated, falling backwards onto the couch and sighing. Sunghoon was surely going to be the death of him. Placing his cold hands on either side of his hot face. Something he noticed he always did whenever he was flustered, or shy. It seemed to check him back into reality.

Jake closed his eyes, allowing himself to rest for a few moments. To his surprise, he managed to drift off into a light slumber. The first time he’d ever been able to sleep while alone in the house. He had been exhausted the last days, busy with work and assignments he had hardly caught a break to rest or nap. With Sunghoon still fresh in his mind, it allowed him to nod off easier.

—

A continuous knocking at the door woke up Jake from his rest. Groaning as he pulled himself up from laying down, reaching for his phone to check the time. Hours had passed since he had passed out. Forgetting the cause of his sudden awaking, loud banging on the door caused his heart rate pick up. Biting his bottom lip as he glared at the door, now fully awake. And confused to who it could possibly be. Surely Sunghoon wouldn’t be back this early from a party? Plus, he had his own key, so why would he be knocking? He furrowed his eyebrows, anxiously looking at the door as it continued to knock. He hoped to himself that it would stop if he simply didn’t answer. Maybe the people getting bored of pestering his home.

However, his theory from before was proved wrong when he heard the loud voice of Heeseung yelling outside, followed by a mumbling which definitely sounded familiar to Sunghoon when he was tired.

Rising from the couch, he hesitantly opened the door, to see his hyung struggling to hold up a slouched Sunghoon who had an arm round his shoulder and was practically pulling him down. His eyes widened a little as he glanced to Heeseung for an explanation. Confused as hell to why his crush was looking like he was gonna pass out already.

“Hey mannnn…” He began, dragging on the word in awkwardness. “So he’s gotten absolutely hammered already- And I do not think it’s a good idea to keep him there much longer so we agreed to bring him home. He was drinking like everything.” The elder boy explained. “Could you take care of him?” He asked anxiously, eyes meeting Jake’s own.

Before he could reply, Sunghoon glanced up.

“I do not need looking after! I am a full grown man..” words slurred he scolded his hyung, peering at the male. “I’m not even that drunk you’re-“ he took a pause as he seemed to lose his train of thought. “You’re being dramatic!” He proudly stated, however the struggle to form a full sentence and slur in his voice definitely contradicted that statement.

His outfit from before was much scuffled up, collar not as neat and defined as earlier, hair a mess and blazer partially falling from his shoulder. Despite his current state, he still somehow managed to look extremely handsome.

Jake rolled his eyes, but chuckled at his crush’s ridiculous antics.

More like love of my life, but crush works.

“Yeah I’ve got him don’t worry, enjoy the rest of your night, Hyung.” He kindly said, shooting a smile towards Heeseung who seemed very grateful. Jake’s sudden voice however, seemed to wake Sunghoon a little from his daze, head whipping up as he looked at the male infront of him.

“Yunie!” He exclaimed, pulling away from his hyung and crashing into his roommate’s arms instead. Jake yelped a little, staggering back a few steps as he stabilised Sunghoon in his hold.

God, how drunk was he? The hell did he drink so fast?

“Thanks hyung, I’ll see you another time.” Jake bids goodbye, assuring his Hyung he could take care of the male who was currently testing all the muscles in his arms. (It wasn’t a lot!) closing the door, he turned all his attention towards the younger, bringing a hand to brush his black hair out his eyes with care.

All of a sudden, Sunghoon brought him into a firm hug. Arms wrapping around their usual home on Jake’s waist, as he shoved his face into the crook of his neck.
Stunned by the action, the blonde took a few seconds to comprehend it, before returning the hug. A hand running through the boy’s messy hair. His heart beat fast, as it always did around him.

“I missed you.” Sunghoon whispered out. Jake felt a shiver run through his body as his rooommate’s hot breath came in contact with the skin of his neck. Face heating up at the feeling, hairs standing up across his body. Closing his eyes for a minute, he indulged in his drunken state.

“I missed you too.” He replied, as the two stood still at the entrance of the apartment, right in eachother’s embrace. Jake tried not to think too much of the words, he was drunk after all. After a few minutes, he spoke again.

“C’mon you, let’s get you to bed.” He sighed, pulling away and beginning to escort the man who was unable to stand on his own.

“I’m not tired.” He whined like a child, yet still continued to walk with Jake towards his room. He scoffed, knowing he would probably immediately crash once in bed.
The two entered the room, Jake struggling to open the door for a while as Sunghoon had a tight grip around him and was practically pulling the much smaller boy down.

After the minor difficulty, the younger shuffled onto the bed, immediately melting into the familiar comfort. Jake stood close, watching the boy. Whispering in a sweet voice.

“Take your jacket and shoes off Hoonie, I’ll get you some water.” He tells him, hoping the male would be able to in his drunken state. As he was about to leave the room, a grip on his wrist pulled him back closer. He met eyes with Sunghoon’s, who seemed to worry. He had sat up now, staring at him confused. He couldn’t help but feel a little sad at the boy’s solem expression. He brought up his free hand to his hair to neaten it up again.

“Where are you going?” He asked, despite being just told. Alcohol messing with his brain.

“I’m just getting you some water, Hoon, so you can sober up, okay?” He says soothingly, reassuring the boy. Suddenly, he felt a strong sense of deja vu. This situation was awfully familiar to when he had his panic attack, and worried that Sunghoon was leaving him in his vulnerable state. He tried to react the comfort he provided him that night. He owed it.

He seemed to have clocked what he said from earlier as he let go shyly, Jake smiled at him before walking out the room. He’s so cute. Opening the fridge he grabbed a bottle of water and appreciating the cold air that hit his overheated face. He ran a hand through his much overgrown hair.

This was going to be a long night.

He felt his heart break at the thoughts of what his friend could’ve been up to at the party crossed his mind. It was natural to find a stranger to cling around to at a party, an innocent touch of a chest turned to a kiss to making out-
He felt his chest physically hurt. Who knew love was such a strong emotion. It ruined his mood Immensely just beginning to imagine that. He sighed to himself, pushing the intrusive thoughts of the friend he was in love with getting touchy with someone else away.

Knowing he shouldn’t take too long, he walked back into Sunghoon’s room, who had removed his shoes and jacket. Sprawled across his bed, his face flushed a little red from the effect of alcohol. He passed the water to him, insisting he needed to drink it. After a little refusal, he ended up drinking most of it, putting the rest to the side for now. He returned to his position of lying on his side, eyes not leaving Jake. The same sad look on his face.

“You feeling okay?” He questioned, bringing the back of his hand to Sunghoon’s forehead. Who only nodded in response.

After a few more moments of silence, the elder retracted his hand. “Call me if you need me, get some rest Hoonie.” He began, fully expecting the other to accept and fall asleep for the night. But an obvious deeper frown formed on his face.

“Can you lay with me? Until I fall asleep s’all.” He whispered, his voice was still pretty slurred and incoherent. Jake figured it would be quite some time till he actually sobered up. “I don’t feel good.” He felt compelled to say yes, not wanting to leave an upset, drunk, Sunghoon alone for the night. Especially when he wasn’t certain if he was feeling well. He could practically throw up at any minute.

He nodded his head, hesitantly walking to the other side. He climbed into the bed, resting on his side too, eye level matching Sunghoon’s as the two innocently stared at eachother. They stayed In silence for minutes, Sunghoon letting his eyes rest before opening them.

He felt more blood to his face as the ravenette’s gaze flickered over him gently, like he was assessing all his features. From his hair, eyes, nose, lips. He gulped down subtly under the stare, heart trembling.

“Have I ever told you how pretty you are?” Voice nothing but a whisper, but a surprising amount of sincerity for someone who had drank so much. Jake’s heart raced faster, unable to respond for a little while as he looked away from the other’s eyes.

“Have you seen yourself?” He spoke back, watching as Sunghoon smiled a little, cheeks flushing the tiniest bit pinker.

Gosh, how he wanted to see him blush more.

“I really mean it though.” Sunghoon spoke again. He brought a hand up, reaching with such care, he placed it over Jake’s face and jaw. Thumb lightly caressing the apple of his cheek. He blushed impossibly more. He couldn’t remember a time where his cheeks weren’t burning at the bone around his roommate. “I feel like you don’t get told it enough. It makes me sad, you’re really pretty Jake.” Frowning once again, lips even pouting a little. He seemed genuinely concerned that the elder didn’t get complimented enough, brows furrowing in confusion.

The elder’s heart was melting. However he quickly tried to stop himself from feeling too much effect. Sunghoon was drunk after all, he was probably saying whatever random thought occurred in his mind. There were pauses and he stumbled with words, setting a reminder he wasn’t thinking straight right now.

“Thank you, Sunghoon.” He smiled, grateful for the sweet words. He was happy to see the male wasn’t frowning anymore. As the younger still continued to caress his cheek lightly. More peaceful moments of silence passed. Subconsciously, the two had drifted closer together. The Australian felt himself getting drowsy at the tranquillising feeling of Sunghoon caressing his cheek smoothly.

“You make me feel really weird, Y’know?” Sunghoon suddenly confesses. Thumb stopping his ministrations. Jake stared worriedly as he waited for the male to elaborate. Paranoid it was a bad feeling. It took some time, since he was still trying to form words steadily. “I always want to be around you, more than anyone else. Be close to you. I don’t hug anyone else cause I don’t wanna. With you it’s different, s’nice. You’re cute.” He explains further.

The beating in Jake’s heart began to get louder. Feeling the pounding in his chest. He just stared back, unsure on what to say. Surely he was just spouting nonsense, right? However there was always that saying.

That drunk people would say things they’re too scared to say sober.

The revelation that his feelings might be returned caused an overwhelming emotion to hit Jake all at once. Feeling giddy and light at just the mere possibility, he had a chance with Sunghoon.

All of a sudden, he followed Sunghoon’s gaze down, his body heating, heart stammering impossibly faster as they resided at his lips. A gentle touch over his bottom lip, made Jake feel like his whole body stopped functioning. Stopping himself from taking a sudden deep breath, not wanting to move and interrupt the tense atmosphere.

His lip was gently pulled out by Sunghoon’s thumb, which brushed over it once again, keeping it there as he spoke.

“I have really, really, wanted to kiss you.” He admits, slowly raising his eyes back to Jake’s own. Finally taking a breath, he swallowed down nervously. He didn’t know what to make of the situation.

“Tell me this when your sober Hoon-ah, then we’ll talk.” Calmly he explained, and felt a pang of guilt as the frown on the taller’s lips returned. As much as he desperately wanted to kiss that frown away, he wasn’t going to act on feelings that may not be real. He wanted to hear it from Sunghoon, in the right mind. He sighed sadly before replying.

“I don’t wanna tell you sober.” He admits, flickering his eyes away in shame.

“Why not?”

“Because I get too scared.” Whispering in such a fragile voice. Small parts of the elder’s heart was breaking away.

Jake brought his own hand up, placing it over Sunghoon’s that was holding his face. He gripped the bigger hand languidly.

“You have nothing to be afraid of, I want to hear how you feel. You told me yourself, you’d never judge me. The same goes for you.” Squeezing the male’s hand in reassurance.

“Even if I like you? S’much more than a friend.” He slurred out, the tiredness in his voice evident, eyes becoming hooded as he struggled to keep them open.

Jake had never felt so rigid, his body was uncomfortably hot, heart hammering at his chest. Majorly confused on wether he should take these words sincerely. What if it all meant nothing, and by the morning this whole conversation never happened to Sunghoon. While he remained heartbroken as he was hopelessly falling for his roommate more and more. There was no way he liked him back. He felt way out of his league. But here he was, spilling out how much he liked Jake. It was hard to believe, it would still be hard to believe even if Sunghoon was sober.
A trait that came along with autophobia was the feeling of aloneness so often. He felt like he wouldn’t be worthy of Sunghoon’s love. Like he would be stopping him from finding someone who truly made the male happy and wouldn’t be a burden upon him. It hurt his chest to think of, the hopeless feeling that you were born to be alone. Everyone else aside you gets to be happy. Before he allowed the tears pricking at his eyes to fall, he took another deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment.

For now, he chose to try worry about it tomorrow instead.

“Even if you like me.”

Sunghoon smiled, moving his hand away and instead pulling Jake close to him, securely wrapping them round his waist, his favourite place to hold the smaller boy.

“Tired, go sleep.” He mumbled, nuzzling into Jake’s hair, his scent of vanilla shampoo relaxing him.

Jaeyun chose not to refuse, opting to push everything in a little box to open tomorrow. For now, he focused on the comforting embrace of his roommate. Closing his eyes and allowing exhaustion to engulf him. Being in the others arms always made him feel better. He was sure the boy was going to be confused as hell tomorrow. But not wanting to worry about that now, he knew he wouldn’t escape the strong embrace anyway, even if he wanted to.

Smiling, he felt the gentle press of lips against his head, as he drifted off into dreamland.

Jake groaned as he woke up, wanting to stay in the warmth that currently surrounded him. Naturally nuzzling into the embrace he was currently in. Content in the peaceful atmosphere until the events from last night flashed through his head, and he realised he was still trapped in Sunghoon’s arms. Heart beating fast as all the words from his friend repeated themselves again and again.

Pulling away a little, he peeked his eyes open. His roommate thankfully seemed be out cold. As expected, he was going to have a killer headache when he woke up. Due to this, he would be able to move out of the boy’s arms without waking him. Hopefully. If this were any other day, he’d gladly remain in the hold forever, his mind and body very satisfied whenever he was in Sunghoon’s arms. Unfortunately for Jake, he had work in the morning before his lectures in the afternoon.

Internally crying at his schedule, he carefully removed himself from the taller who stirred and complained a little at the lack of something to cling to. Jake held his breath for a second or two until he watched Sunghoon go completely lax, soft snores filling the room once again.

Chucking, he head for his room for clothes and a towel to clean up before leaving. As the warm water hit his body, Jake finally allowed himself to think over his predicament, you could say. Still being completely unsure on the real stance of Sunghoon’s feelings. He knew the simple solution would be to just ask. But well, Jake certainly wasn’t a simple guy. His high functioning anxiety made that severely more difficult. And his crippling obsession of thoughts that he wasn’t worthy of romantic love, made that severely more difficult. Hence why he had been single the last 19 years of his life.

He hoped, Sunghoon would come to him first. It was selfish to ask that, as Hoon was mainly the one who had initiated things throughout their friendship. However, Jake felt like he had a pretty valid excuse.

He finished up quickly in the bathroom, changing into his clothes, and slinging the towel round his shoulder for his still damp hair as he went into the kitchen for something to eat before he left for work.

To his surprise, Sunghoon was there, downing what seemed to be tablets and a glass of water. Seems like he’s woken up happy, he laughed to himself.

“Feel like shit?” He suddenly asked, walking round the corner into the same room as Hoon. Startled by the sudden appearance, he jumped a little and placed a hand over his head as he felt a pang of pain. Jake now chuckled aloud. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s no worries…” he said, brushing it off. The blonde watched a red tint dust over the male’s cheeks. He assumed it was just from the embarrassment of getting spooked. “Yeah you could say that. My head feels like it’s gonna explode.” He groaned, bringing up his hands to massage at his temples. Eyes shut firmly, a pained expression on his face.

Jake wondered, if he had remembered their conversation from last time. Praying that he did, he didn’t think he could live without finding out if those words were genuine or not. Actually scrap that, he could definitely live without being told that it meant nothing to Sunghoon. To say the least, he wouldn’t be able to explain the heartbreak If that was the case. That all those words spoken, that seemed so sincere were just the mill of the moment, and an intoxicated mind. He felt sick, a frown on lips he couldn’t control.

However, if it was the other option? He definitely wanted to know.

He hummed, reaching out and getting a breakfast bar from the cupboard.

“You were completely out of it when you came home, you weren’t even gone that long.” He teased, trying to change the focus in his mind, he glanced over to the younger. The pink hue on his face only seemed to turn red. Awkwardly smiling.

“Sorry, I didn’t expect to drink so much.” He apologised, glancing down towards his feet. Jake definitely enjoyed seeing a shy Sunghoon for once. This must be how he constantly feels seeing Jake get flustered at everything he does!

However, he felt a pang in his heart as he realised the boy probably didn’t remember much from the night before.

“You’re fine Hoonie, don’t be sorry.” He said, dropping the towel into the wash basket nearby. “I’ve got work, I’ll see you later. Get some rest, Hoon-ah, message me if you want me to get you anything.” He shot him a sympathetic smile with the kind offer. Beginning to walk out the kitchen until he got interrupted.

“Wait- Jake.” He turned back to Sunghoon, glancing over in curiosity. The said male was holding the back of his neck, a trait Jake noticed, that he did when he was anxious. He hesitated for a minute, silence filling the room like there was uncertainty in his thoughts. “Actually never mind, have a good day at work.” He backed out. Jake sent a concerned glance, pouting at the younger.

“Hoon, what is it?”

“Nothing! Well, I’ll just speak to you when you’re back home.” He explained, leaning onto the counter, diverting his attention elsewhere. Thoroughly confused, but knowing he wouldn’t budge in talking, Jake sighed before bidding him goodbye for the second time. Sunghoon was stubborn, he was very aware of that, not bothering to question his friends odd behaviour. He would figure it out after work he guessed.

Walking out the apartment he exhaled, not looking forward to the long day of work, lectures and assignments.

____

The day had passed antagonistically slowly, Jake even practically falling asleep in his maths lecture as the professor went on and on about the same topic, he swears they’ve been doing for a year! He wanted nothing more than to go home and spend time with his friend. He was still concerned on to what he was going to say earlier, the thought had been boggling his mind all day. Making Jungwon constantly pull Jake out of a daze during their morning shift at the café.

He could tell he was getting on Jungwon’s nerves. While being 17, the feline like boy could be very scary sometimes if you get on his bad side! A shiver ran down his spine. The Australian definitely didn’t want that to happen. So he shoved his endless worries away for the rest of the shift which went surprisingly smoothly.

However as he now pulled himself up the stairs of his apartment complex, he looked forward to crashing down on the couch, and making himself a third coffee today. Turning the key in the door and throwing off his shoes and coat, he flopped down onto the ever so comfortable pillows on the sofa.

The sound must’ve caught the attention of his roommate, who came out and laughed at his friend’s state. Leaning over the back of couch and ruffling Jake’s hair softly.

“Long day?” He questioned. He only hummed in response, not having the energy to form a verbal reply. Sunghoon seemed to have gotten the hint, smiling towards the boy before disappearing into the kitchen round the corner.

Jake felt a wide smile as he heard the sounds of the coffee machine sounding through the apartment. (He had insisted on buying a coffee machine to fuel his caffeine addiction.) Sunghoon always seemed to know him so well. He was so observant of his wants and needs, he couldn’t help but feel all fuzzy inside as he heard the boy making him a coffee. Such a small yet sweet gesture. It motivated him to get up from his worn out state on the couch. Happily making his way to the kitchen, a metaphorical tail wagging behind him.

Just in time, Sunghoon slid the glass to him over the counter, watching Jake happily drink it. The raventte chuckled, he had such endearment for his roommate, such small things would cause a whole 180 shift in his mood. One second he lay flat out across a couch, not wanting to even talk, and now he seemed like a hyper dog who was at their favourite park. He found him adorable, as he admired.

“Thank you, Hoonie.” Smiling brightly towards Sunghoon, whos eyes were already resting on him. Giving a simple nod. He placed the cup down, leaning onto the counter next to him as he remembered to ask the other what he wanted to talk about. Nerves building on his stomach as he asked, he had a feeling it would be about last night.

“What did you want to tell me earlier?”

Sunghoon looked away for a second, almost as if he were pulling himself together. Before he walked towards Jake, raising a hand and gently placing it at the nape of his neck. The shorter of the two nervously looked up, heart already racing a little. He felt like he was being examined, the taller’s eyes darted all around his face. The silence was practically killing the shorter, stomach churning inside him. The soft feeling of the boys fingers on his neck making him resist the urge to shiver.

“You’re really pretty, Jakey.” He says softly, his hand playing with the stray pieces of hair at his nape. Jake awkwardly laughed at the odd behaviour, the sentence very familiar from last night.

“Are you drunk again?” He joked, shooting Sunghoon a teasing glare, yet was only met with a serious expression.

“You said you wanted to hear everything when I was sober, right?” He whispers, there was a wave of nervousness between his words. Jake picked up on how fidgety he was, body not completely still. The Aussie felt his cheeks heat up from the conversation and close proximity. The hairs at the back of his neck stood up as Sunghoon kept his touch there.

He remembered everything?

“You remember?”

“Most of it.”

Jake looked down, anxiety and anticipation mixing together in his chest. Does that mean he remembers the confession? He meant all of it? Surely he could’ve played it off as being drunk and stupid if he didn’t, yet he seemed so serious.

Scared to ask the ask the question, yet Jake was dying to know. He needed to know the other boys feelings once and for all.

“Did you mean everything?” tone cracked, he ushered, biting down on his bottom lip to soothe his nerves. He could hardly comprehend that he was really having this conversation right now. He was scared, terrified of the response. This was either going to break their friendship, or…He wasn’t sure what else. He had never got to the stages of confessing to someone. Let alone his feelings being returned. He had no idea what it would lead to. He scraped the thought.

You don’t even know yet! Shut up!

Sunghoon suddenly moved his other hand, this one coming up to cup at Jake’s jaw, tilting his head up to catch his eyes once again. The same feeling of tenseness from last night repeated itself. Maybe this time even more as he knew the boy infront of him was certainly sober, and serious. The tension was so much you could pierce it with a knife.

Jake felt his eyes widen and heart beat uncontrollably as Sunghoon dipped his head down, the two mere inches apart.

“I meant every word, Jake. Every word.”

Looking into Sunghoon’s eyes, he saw the sincerity. There was passion, and desire sparkling in them. Most of all, he was so serious, not a hint of teasing or joking. It wasn’t all some big prank. Jake felt so small in his hold, so overwhelmed by the tiny amount that had been said. He stuttered through his thoughts. Park Sunghoon, liked him. Him! Oh my god he liked him back- Internally freaking out, he couldn’t help but shyly smile, heart fluttering when Sunghoon matched it.

Is there where I tell him I feel the same?

“You like me?” He couldn’t help but ask through his disbelief. Sunghoon chuckled at his words, thumb stroking over his cheek.

“I told you, I meant every word.” He reassured. Yet Jake still couldn’t help but find a slight reason to doubt it all. It all felt too good to be true!

“Wait.. so that means, you want to kiss me?” He stuttered nervously. The taller smirked playfully at this, his fangs peeking through. They were Jake’s favourite feature. The atmosphere suddenly went thick again, as the raventte moved in even closer. Their noses bumping together. Face completely flushed, Jake was freaking out that he could feel the younger’s breath on his lips. Eyes widened again he tried to compose himself while he waited for an answer.

“How about I just show you instead?” His voice was so quiet, so enticing and soft it had Jake physically melting. He was so in with love with this guy. However the words hit him and he felt his heart beat right in his ears.

Oh my god, Park Fucking Sunghoon just asked to kiss me, and I’m standing here like a fool!

He had waited weeks far too long to get what he wanted, he definitely wasn’t going to miss the opportunity now. Longing so desperately to know what Sunghoon’s lips felt like. He brought up a hand and clutched at the male’s shirt, before whispering out.

“Please, yes.”

Sunghoon stared with one final smirk as he watched Jake flutter his eyes shut, he closed the gap between them, finally. Both of them yearning for the contact for so long. And wow, it felt better than Jake could’ve ever pictured. Grip on Sunghoon’s shirt tightening as his lips moved against his slowly.

His whole body felt warm, so so warm. There were definitely sparks in his stomach, but it was nothing compared to comfort he was feeling. Everything felt so right. Sunghoon’s lips were as soft as he imagined and hoped they were, as he tried to follow the taller’s movements. This was the blonde’s first kiss after all, he didn’t lie about being single his entire life. Sunghoon took his time, full patience as he guided Jaeyun’s lips with his.

They fumbled a little, before getting into a consistent rhythm with one another. Lips dancing sweetly together, like they were made for eachother. Sunghoon gently tilted Jake’s head to the side with the tips of fingers, giving them better access to kiss more. The younger tasted the hints of coffee over his lips, yet he was so sweet, only making him want to take more.

Jaeyun was on cloud 9, he felt like he was in a dream and nothing was real. Mind so hazy. How he went from sprawled across a couch, to kissing his roommate in the matter of 10 minutes was beyond him. He embraced it, moving closing and wrapping his arms around Sunghoon’s neck as the taller snaked his own round his slim waist. Nothing else mattered in the world to them, aside the touch of their lips.

The two pulled apart from the messy kiss, it definitely wasn’t perfect, but it felt like it was it. Because it was them. No fairy tail or flawless confession. They rested their foreheads together, both heaving for breath with shy smiles on their faces. Feeling the heat radiating from eachother, cheeks matching a shade of red.

Jake allowed Sunghoon to peck his lips more times, smiling against eachother’s lips. Before he finally decided it was time to confirm his feelings back.

“I like you so much.” He whispered. The raventte grinned widely, not stopping himself from placing pecks everywhere over his roommates face. His cheeks, nose, eyelids, forehead, chin and finishing with his lips. Leaving a giggling Jake, trying to shove him away to stop the ticklish feeling. After he finished, the taller rested his chin ontop of the blonde’s head, hands moving soothingly over on his waist.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.”

Jake giggled, moving his head so he could look back into his eyes. Rubbing their noses together again.

“I wish you did it sooner.”

“Yeah, me too.” He replied, taking that as his queue to dive back in and reseal their lips into a second breathtaking kiss. The blonde trying to stop himself from smiling to respond to the feverish movement of their lips. Small laughs interrupting it every now and again from both sides, entangled in eachother’s embrace.

It was weird that their confession was done nowhere else other than their simple kitchen. Their first kiss being there too. But really, it was unnecessary for it to be anywhere else. Nothing extravagant was ever needed between the two, as their relationship built slowly but surely. It wasn’t sudden, and everyone saw it coming from a mile way. There was no requirement for some huge confession. Some fancy restaurant that didn’t suit either of their styles. It’s strange, how this small kitchen seemed to hold so many of their firsts. On their first day of meeting they held their first conversations here. Ate the same meal Sunghoon had ordered. Even on their first night together, the two propped up on counter, as they spoke for hours. Everything was easy, so simple and so small. It’s why Jake fell head over heels, smiling widely against Sunghoon’s lips as they repeatedly dove back in for more kisses. Addiction already starting, addiction to his feelings being requited.

Oh what a great day it was to be alive.

“I’m so glad you talk so much when you’re drunk.” Jake joked as the two had migrated to the couch, still as close as they could possibly be. Sunghoon threw his head back and laughed at that.

“Yeah me too to be honest. However that would’ve sucked completely if you didn’t like me too. I wouldn’t be leaving my room for the next month.” Chuckling, he intertwined his hand with the smaller’s. Jake scoffed in response, turning his gaze from their enlaced hands to look at him instead.

“You knew I liked you, there was no way you didn’t.” He accused, eyes narrowing towards Sunghoon who laughed aloud again, giving their hands a squeeze.

“Maybe on some level….I had a little guess as you got flustered all the time around me. But I wasn’t sure! You’re always clingy with people.” He spoke shyly, stroking his thumb over the soft skin of Jaeyun’s hand.

“I’m never as clingy to them as I am you. I don’t do half the stuff we do.” He confessed.

“Yeah, I would hope you’re not kissing our friends like you just kissed me, baby.” He teased, a dumb smirk plastered over his face as Jake physically lagged at the comment. Firstly at the comment itself, he was DEFINITELY not kissing anyone else. Secondly, at the nickname that just got blurted out. Blushing furiously he looked away, turning his head in the complete opposite direction.

“Shut up! Of course I’m not, I hate you.” He sulked, heart hammering at the petname. It seemed Sunghoon was fond of nicknames, giving Jake one on their second day of meeting and now giving him a different one just 30 minutes after they confessed!

Sunghoon giggled, placing a hand on Jaeyun’s chin to turn his head back towards him, pressing a kiss to his cheek as he did.

“What, you don’t like the name?” He fake frowned, tracing a finger over the plush bottom lip of Jake. The lip he had dreamt to kiss and it was definitely worth the wait. “I can give you another if you want, honey.” Smirking, he kept his hold on his chin still. Said male was completely freaking out, placing his hands over his eyes in dismay as he got relentlessly teased. He felt like a 13 year old girl had just a love letter from her crush.

“Stop!! Let me breathe Park Sunghoon.” He exclaimed, no malicious or actual intent for him to stop. The younger laughed, however pulling his hand away from his chin and giving him mercy. He couldn’t think the elder could possibly get more flustered.

“Alright, alright I’m done.” He breathed out, reaching out to atleast interwine their hands together again. Jake noticed, that was something Hoon always liked to do. Leaning onto him and resting his head on his roommate’s shoulder, he finally allowed his heart to calm down.

“I want to take you on a date.” Sunghoon spoke after a few minutes of a comfortable silence. Before Jake could send him another death glare, he quickly interrupted, laughing at his reaction. “I’m serious this time! No teasing.” Resting his head onto the boys beside him.

“Okay, I’d like that.” He whispered, pulling away and looking towards Sunghoon with a precious smile. The taller couldn’t help himself as he leant in and kissed his lips, again. Happy couldn’t begin to describe Jake’s emotions, feeling so elated and gleeful. Star struck to be kissing the Park Sunghoon, knowing the other felt exactly the same way as they spent the night brushing lips for god knows how long.

—

A few days had passed since the two’s confession. Let’s say they had become even more inseparable. If that was even possible. Jake not even sleeping in his own bed for the last 4 nights, much preferring to be cuddled to sleep in Sunghoon’s arms instead. Who always dragged him into his room anyway, not wanting to be apart.

Jake groaned as his loud alarm sounded next to him from his phone, the blaring sound obviously waking up Sunghoon from his slumber too as he shifted, whining at Jake to turn the alarm off. He reached over, switching it off before checking the time. He began hating working morning shifts as it interrupted his comfort in his roommate’s arms. Whos arms were currently round his waist, head resting against the nape of Jake’s neck. Despite every part of his body willing himself to go back to sleep, he’d rather not arrive late for work. Dragging his body to sit up, which only caused a complaint from the male clinging onto him.

Sunghoon strengthened his hold on the Australian, mumbling in his drowsy morning voice. The voice that never failed to give Jake chills down his spine. As it was deeper and hoarse compared to his natural tone, driving him crazy.

“5 more minutes.” He muttered, keeping a firm hold on Jake, who sighed unable to escape the iron grip.

“I have work, Hoon-ah. I’d rather not get killed by Jungwon.” He replied, turning around in his hold, face to face with the stunning boy. Eyes still clamped shut, hair unkept and messy. He thought that this Sunghoon was his favourite one.

“Fine.” He gave up, not before leaning forward and pressing a kiss onto the blonde’s forehead. Finally retracting his arms.

Jake smiled as he got up, having showered last night not needing to worry about it this morning. He stretched his limbs as he grabbed his uniform from his own room and changing. The usual routine of heading to the kitchen. While waiting for his coffee to be made, a familiar pair of arms wrapped round his waist. Sunghoon’s chin resting on his shoulder.

“Why are you awake, go back to bed, grumpy.” He chuckled, turning his face to look at the taller for a second who smiled softly. Detaching himself a little before glancing to Jake with a cheeky grin.

“Wanna see something cool I found?”

Jake definitely did.

The two making their way up the further stairs of the apartment building, hands tightly clutching onto one another. Jake was a little confused on to why they were climbing steps in the ungodly hours of the morning. However it all making sense once he saw the door to the roof left wide open. The two had never been all the way up before. Well, Sunghoon apparently had, having discovered this somehow.

The crisp morning air brushed past Jake’s cheeks as he stepped outside, however it was refreshing. Not cold enough to be uncomfortable, just a small bit chilling. As he looked at the view, he saw the sun rising over the bundles of buildings and sky scrapers. The usual pretty colours dotted in the sky.

He had watched two sunsets with Sunghoon, but not a sunrise. Until now. The latter seemed extra proud of himself for his discovery, Jake smiling softly towards him. He walked to the building edge, perching himself up at the wall. He felt his heart flutter as Sunghoon stood next to him, arm brushing against his.

He remained by his point that the sun was one of his favourite views, even more so as he stood high up on the roof of a building, a perfect sight of the beauty of nature before him. Grateful that Sunghoon had taken such an interest in his fascination, that he brought Jake here so early in the morning. Creating yet another memorable experience with the younger.

Sighing in content, Jake observed the pretty sky, as the sun began to shine its light over the earth. It’s subtle beams gently casting over his face, creating the most beautiful scene Sunghoon had even seen, as he stared at the shorter. Watching in a daze as the sun brought out the golden glow of Jake’s sun-kissed skin, and beautiful dark eyes becoming brighter.

“It’s so pretty.” Jaeyun whispered out, staring longingly at the sky.

“You’re prettier.” Sunghoon retorted, adoring as a pink tint then coated his breathtaking face. Jake rolled his eyes jokingly, shyly smiling.

“Okay, dude.” He replied, chuckling at Sunghoon’s dumbfounded expression, he shot a glare at Jake before reaching forward and pulling him close. Still admiring as the golden streaks of the sun’s rays hit his face.

“Don’t dude me.” He huffed, head dipping down to Jake’s. “I’m definitely not your dude.” Firmly speaking as he raised an eyebrow to the smaller boy who chuckled, staring back. A subtle breeze blowing past the two, making Sunghoon’s hair blow subtly.

“Are you not?” He teased, wrapping his arms around Sunghoon’s shoulders. “What else are you then?” He whispered, grin playing on his lips.

That was when the sudden realisation than the two hadn’t actually discussed what they were hit Sunghoon. It was obvious they passed the friends term. Sunghoon wasn’t sure that friends admit their feelings to eachother, go on dates and kiss. The younger smiled, leaning forward and pressing a chaste kiss to his cheek, letting it linger for a few seconds.

“What, you been waiting for me to ask, baby?” He teased back, loving the way Jake’s entire face flushed red, even the tips of his ears. It was so adorable. “You should’ve told me you’d been waiting.” Voice in such mockingly seductive tone, Jake audibly groaned, bringing a hand to whack at his chest.

“Sunghoon.” He whined, dragging on the letters with a pout. Hoping that acting cutesy would help him with the situation. And oh indeed it did. Sunghoon smiled widely, laughing at his adorable unofficial partner. Stopping himself from cooing aloud at Jake. He cupped his face gently, leaning forward and pressing a couple pecks onto his lips.

“Sim Jaeyun, will you do the honours of becoming my amazingly, pretty and smart boyfriend.” Jake blushed harder at the question, whining aloud again as he hid into Sunghoon’s neck for a second, trying to compose himself and his beating heart. He pulled away, although still shyly not meeting his eyes with the taller’s. Sunghoon was practically cackling at the whole 180 in the situation, from teasing him to being completely flustered.

“Yes, I would want nothing more.” He whispered. He had never felt himself feel so light and happy in his life. He was finally, finally, the love of his life’s boyfriend. Sunghoon tilted his boyfriend’s head up, eyes meeting eachother’s again. Adoration and love.

“I’m so glad.”

He spoke, before leaning down and connecting their lips into the softest kiss Jake has ever experienced in his life. Savouring the taste and feeling of their lips together as they ever so gently moved together, to then only grazing against eachother’s. Sunghoon was so tender, always, so tender with Jake. Like he was the most precious piece of china in the world.

The sun rose behind as the two kissed on the roof, shining over them. The bright star marked the signal of a new day. A symbol of a new start, hope, faith. As Jake and Sunghoon began their new start together, officially, as boyfriends.

Jake arrived late to work that day. Not a single care in the world as he got scolded by Jungwon for punctuality. He was far too excited that he was dating Park Sunghoon instead. Unusually happy all day, Jungwon stared at his hyung in disgust, face cringing as he continuously clinged to him. His hyung was definitely going insane. The only thing to in that situation? Call Jay and ask him to fix his best friend.

Feeling his phone go off while on break, Jake opened the notification, feeling himself laughing at the message.

From: Jay 🇺🇸🦅

‘I have no idea what you’re doing but whatever it is you’re scaring Jungwon’

‘I’m not doing anything ! D:< Can’t a guy be happy anymore????? 🥰🥰🥰’

From: Jay 🇺🇸🦅

‘Something happened with Sunghoon didn’t It? He’s been acting weird asf lately too.’

‘I have no idea what you’re on about 😨😇😇😇😇😇’

Jake snorted as he left the messages there, not bothering to reply to the bundles of notifications Jay was bombarding him with. Smiling to himself as he clocked back into his shift.

_____

“I’m serious! I liked you from the day we met!” Sunghoon called out, propping himself up with one elbow from where he was resting on his side.

“No you did not! You’re just trying to one up me.” Jake laughed loudly, eyes full of nothing but love as he gazed up at his rooomate, laying beside him. They were currently sprawled out across Sunghoon’s bed, indulged in random cliché conversations. Right now they were having a debate on who liked who first. Cliché, like I said.

“Hey, I’m not lying. Why do you think I was staring at you so much for the first few days?” He hummed, reaching out a hand and flicking Jake lightly on the head. Who placed his hand where he had hit, glaring up to him.

“You were!? I didn’t even notice, I was a little intimidated by you then.” He sheepishly admits, cheeks flushing pink. It was strange to think he was intimidated by this absolute softey. However, Sunghoon seemed to take nothing but offence, dramatically gasping.

“You found me intimidating?!” He shouted, placing a hand over his heart as if he’d been shot. Jake practically cackled at that, watching in amusement. “Wow I can’t believe this, here I was admiring how pretty you were and you were intimidated by me! My heart is breaking.” He continued with the monologue as he acted like he was in a high school play. Jake struggled to breathe watching it all unfold. Reaching over and pulling Sunghoon closer between breaths.

“Alright, pack it in, Shakespeare.” He sniggered after the two had calmed down. He wrapped his arms around Sunghoon’s neck, tugging him closer. The younger placing a hand on the other side of Jake’s body, hovering over him. “I was only intimidated by how handsome you are.” He whispered, smiling brightly at his boyfriend who blushed beautifully above him. He giggled, leaning forward and rubbing their noses together affectionately.

“Yeah?” Sunghoon hummed.

“Yeah.” He confirmed.

The two stared at eachother intently, admiring eachother. The blonde feeling himself etching to kiss his boyfriends soft lips again. They were so addictive.

Jake’s eyes flickered from his eyes to his lips in the peaceful moment.
“Kiss me, please?” and Sunghoon wasted no time in leaning down and capturing their lips into a passionate kiss. Jaeyun gasping at the fast pace yet having zero complaints, pushing his body flush against his boyfriend’s. Clothed chests pressed together.

Feverishly, their lips moved, like it was the last thing either of them would be able to. Jake felt his body heating up, as he ran his hand through Sunghoon’s hair, lightly tugging at the soft strands between his fingers. Heart pounding in his chest at the positive response of light groans. Trying his best to follow along with his boyfriends movements as the kisses became more open mouthed. He felt as the younger shifted, his legs now either side of his own body, enclosing him into the passionate moment.

He felt himself gasp, as together Sunghoon’s hands slipped down to his waist, gripping it tightly and a gentle bite to his bottom lip as he playfully tugged at it. Jake was going crazy, tilting his head to the side to give his boyfriend better access to do as pleased. Hand in his hair becoming more firm.

He held himself back from letting a sound as Sunghoon swiped his tongue over his bottom lip and entered his mouth. He couldn’t help but let out a tiny whimper as their tongues came into contact, pushing against eachother’s. His boyfriend moved a hand from his waist up to his face, moving their faces to help him lick into Jake’s mouth. He continued to whine as he felt his boyfriends tongue explore every inch of his mouth, not leaving a place untouched. Moans muffled in between. His mind was was completely fuzzy, feeling too good as they two kissed hungrily. How he never wanted this to end.

Finally, needing to take a breath the two pulled apart panting for air. Yet Jake felt himself throw his head back, as Sunghoon’s lips came in contact with his bare skin of his collar bone, travelling up all the way to his jawline as he left open mouthed kissed everywhere. The pleasure made the boy moan softly, hand coming to cover his mouth in embarrassment.

Sunghoon pulled away from his skin by just a little, hot breath still touching, hand coming up to remove Jake’s own from his face. Gently pressing it down beside his head. “Don’t hide, baby.” Tone raspy. The blonde was so embarrassingly flustered at the name, as he audibly whined. Feeling way too good for his heart. It was difficult to believe this was all real, not just some crazy dream. He keened for his boyfriend.

He could feel the other grinning against his skin, continuing to kiss along his neck, before finding a spot that erupted a gasp from his boyfriend and focusing there. He ever so slightly grazed his teeth across the area, pointy fangs hitting first. His tongue swirling around the area. Jake bit down harshly on his bottom lip, trying to stifle his noises.

“I like you, so so so much.” He suddenly confessed as he finished up his work on his neck. Jake smiled, intertwining his hand with Sunghoon’s that was pinned next to him. Not trusting himself to talk in the moment, but hoping it was some sort of answer. He got the hint, capturing their lips into a heated kiss again. “You’re so stunning.”

Just as Sunghoon was about to slip his cold hand under his boyfriend’s shirt, knocking sounded through the apartment. He groaned, loudly. Upset by the interruptions as he stopped him finally feeling his baby’s bare skin under his shirt. Making Jake laugh a little under him. Finger tips grazing at his warm skin under the fabric. He was surely coming back to that another time.

He sighed as the door continued to bang, leaning up to capture his boyfriend’s lips in a sweeter kiss, clearly not impressed with the interruption. Furrowed eyebrows, a stern look on his face.

“I’m gonna kill who ever that is.” He mumbled against his lips, Jake giggling at his words, removing his other hand from Sunghoon’s hair as they still pecked and kissed at eachother’s lips. The raventte admiring how pretty Jake looked under him, a blotchy blush on cheeks, tips of his ears red and hooded eyes.

“Maybe if we ignore it they’ll go away.” He suggested, trying to dive back in to capture the elder’s lips again. Sadly getting blocked.

“Those are our friends, Hoonie. Y’know, the ones who arranged to come here today?” He smiled, placing a hand over his boyfriends mouth to prevent a second make out session. His eyes widened a second as he seemed to remember, sheepishly pulling away.

“Go answer the door, moron.” Jake teased, flattening out his his boyfriend’s hair after he had messed it up in their moment. Sunghoon pecked his lips a final time as he sadly began walking out the room.

“I like you more, by the way.” Jake called after him, still sprawled across the bed, lips red and swollen, yet smiling widely. It only made him look more beautiful in Sunghoon’s eyes. Emotions running on a high, the swelling in his heart increasing. He replied, in such a gentle and sincere tone. Glancing at his boyfriend with doe eyes.

“Yeah. Well I love you.” He grinned, winking at Jake before going to answer the knocking at the door. Leaving him dumbfounded sitting up on the bed. He was well aware he was in love with Sunghoon, yet for some reason the sudden confession from his boyfriend felt so huge. He had to stop himself from squealing, kicking his legs like a little girl. Trying to come down from his high of being kissed so lustfully and yet told he was loved so sweetly. He was effected so hugely by everything Sunghoon said and did. He never thought he could love someone so much, it was basically consuming his life. He gladly let it.

He heard all his friends entering the apartment, complaining about what took Sunghoon so long. And mumbling some other things he couldn’t hear through the walls. Getting up after a few minutes of calming himself down, he was about to walk out the room till he remembered the faint feeling of his boyfriends teeth grazing against his skin. Not trusting that Sunghoon didn’t leave a mark, he opened his phone camera to check. To no idle surprise at all, a blotchy red mark was straight bang noticeable on his neck.

Mentally cursing his boyfriend out, the friends didn’t know of their relationship yet. Well, he was pretty certain Jay had put together the pieces. And if Jay knew that also meant Jungwon knew.

Brushing it off, he reached for one of Sunghoon’s plain hoodies, slipping it over himself, making sure the hood was situated to cover the forming bruise. Due to their height difference it was a few inches too big. The sleeves causing sweater paws to form and the end resting on his thighs. It would do though, he thought before finally leaving the room to greet his friends.

Jaywon seemed unphased, almost tired, as the boy walked out the raventte’s room, while Sunoo raised an eyebrow over to him.

“Isn’t that Sunghoon’s room?” He questioned, watching as Jake took place on the couch next to him. He paused for a second, not sure on what to say. Luckily his boyfriend seemed ready with a lie, peeking out from around the kitchen, able to hear the conversation.

“He came in to help me with my laptop, I almost lost all my data. He was sorting it out while I got the door.” Jake gaped a little at the well thought out lie, before quickly nodding his head, humming in agreement. Sunoo found the answer unsuspicious just ah’ing as response as he scrolled on his phone.

Sunghoon sent a wink his way as the others remained distracted with eachother. Jake rolled his eyes, knowing he was going to get teased later for almost outing them to everyone already.

Music sounded through the speaker as the friends took turns in playing their songs. Keeping a steady background noise as they messed around in the apartment. All voting on skipping most songs Niki played as he repeatedly queued ‘meme’ tracks which only got him banned for ever having control of an aux. He complained in retaliation, flailing around false accusations. ‘Is it because I’m Japanese?!’ As the rest of them laughed, loving to annoy their maknae.

The peaceful conversations turned loud, it always did with the 7 of them in one room. A group of so many different personalities that blended so well together. Yet always creating chaos.

They watched as Sunoo frustratingly chased after Niki after he had stolen his snacks he specifically asked the roommates to buy. The youngest using his much unfair height advantage above the smaller man, continuing to tease him. “You’ll get them back when you get tall enough.” Sniggering. Jake watched in amusement, a smile never leaving his face as he watched the two play cat and mouse through his living room. However not enjoying as he got used as a human shield against the fuming pink haired boy.

“Y’know your apartment is just gonna end up being the permanent Hangout space.” Heeseung commented throughout the chaos, a smirk on his lips as this was the 3rd or 4th time some of them had gathered here, Sighing Sunghoon replied, leaning back onto the back of the sofa.

“I think it already has.” He admitted, looking around at his strange bunch of friends. Despite how loud and obnoxious they got all be sometimes, none of them would trade eachother for the world. Sunghoon felt his eyes gravitate towards Jake, who had an adorable heart smile on his face. As Sunoo and Niki raced round him in circles. Definitely wouldn’t trade this for the world.

The 7 boys gathered firmly around the small coffee table for hours as they played various games throughout the night. Charades to karaoke. Which Heeseung and Jungwon soloed in. Hitting the best scores out of everyone. Sunghoon was surprised they didn’t got a noise complaint! They now sat, all bunched together, eagerly fighting for their life in a board game. Niki pulling Jake onto his team, which he had no issues with, loving to spend time and indulge in the youngest and his antics. It was always fun, he laughed the most with him. However the game resulted in Niki being tackled to the floor in his dumb judgement that lost them the entire game, losing to Jungwon and Sunoo who so happily rubbed it in their faces. The blonde was furious.

“RIKI YAH! SERIOUSLY YOU HAD ONE JOB.” Jake yells, hitting at the giant boy repeatedly as the group erupted into laughter at the pair. Dumbest and dumber, they had been nicknamed after the play fighting. Neither of them enjoying the nickname at all, Jake pouting at Sunghoon who laughed the most. Who stared back with sappy eyes.

After Jake had calmed down from his frustration with Niki, he began picking up some of the empty bows to refill with snacks, smiling softly as Sunghoon helped him. Picking some up himself as well. The two heading for the kitchen, where they were alone just for a few minutes.

“You okay?” Sunghoon asked, as the two replenished the bowls, Jake shoving some popcorn in his mouth while nodding. The group had chose to finish the night with a movie marathon. An ongoing theme with the 7.

“Mhm! Very okay.” He beamed so brightly, Sunghoon definitely needed sunglasses from looking at him. He giggled, placing a hand on his boyfriend’s arm and pulling him slightly closer. Rubbing his hand down the soft fabric. He was truly his sun.

“You look cute in my hoodie by the way, you should keep it.” He teased, smirking as he watched Jake blush adorably. The Australian smiled back at him, like he was just told the greatest news of all time, leaning further into his boyfriends touch.

“Thank you.”

If Jake was the sun, Sunghoon was definitely his moon. Completing each-other so well. Without one, the other couldn’t exist.

A sudden ruckus from the living room caught the twos attention as they walked round the corner, watching with wide smiles as Sunoo had finally successfully fished his snacks back. However resulting in Niki tripping and dramatically acting like his arm had been hurt. Holding it with fake agony. Jake wasn’t sure wether Niki had got that trait from Sunghoon or vice versa. You would think by now, Sunoo would’ve learnt of his friend’s mischievous deceptions. As he leant down in a panic to check on the youngest, an arm round his neck tugged him down as his snacks got stolen yet again. The room filled with laughter and arguing between the friends.

Jake felt himself shift into Sunghoon, chuckling as he scanned his eyes over each one of the group with appreciation. His boyfriend wrapped an around round his shoulder in return, pressing a kiss to his temple. He knew the others weren’t paying them any attention then. Jake shifted his gaze up to Sunghoon, nuzzling into his neck, pressing a soft kiss to the skin. So comfortable, so content. His closest friends right infront of him, his boyfriend as close as possible. Home, he was home.

And it wasn’t because he was at his apartment. It was as Sunghoon stood right next to him, keeping him near. He could be living in a cardboard box, on the streets, in a shed, it didn’t matter. It would still be home if he was with Sunghoon.

He had a long way to go with battling his anxiety, yet it all felt possible now. An attainable goal. He had already come so far in fighting it, defeating what he used to think was impossible. He felt tears prick his eyes, as he stared lovingly at his beloved boyfriend.

Tugging on Sunghoon’s hand to gain his attention, he finally spoke.

“I love you too.”

He smiled, leaning forward to bump their noses together.

“I know.”