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“Papa, I’m gonna marry that boy!”
Dai’s head swung to the side as he looked down at Gai, who was puffing his chest out proudly. The pair was standing just outside of the academy, ready to head home after Gai’s long day at school.
“Oh?” A note of amusement slipped into Dai’s tone. Gai was only six, much too young to even consider dating, not to mention marriage. Yet, he couldn’t help but smile at his enthusiasm.
“Mhm, mhm!” Gai nodded, crossing his arms. “And we’re gonna eat curry. And you’ll walk me down the aisle. And we’ll invite the Hokage as well! It’ll be epic!” He grinned, showing off a few of his missing teeth. Dai chuckled at him, rustling his hair affectionately.
Dai didn’t have the heart to tell him that lord third would be less than pleased about going to a wedding, especially one featuring two men. Konoha as a whole had always been…prickly about the subject, but Dai wasn’t about to crush his kid’s hopes of a perfect wedding. Maybe by the time he was old enough to get married, things would be different. He could only hope.
Dai instead turned his head to where Gai was intensely looking, toward his supposed future spouse. The only person he spotted was Sakumo’s child, Kakashi Hatake. He was playing with a kunai, drawing random things in the dirt. His face was covered with a mask, and his unruly hair fell in front of his eyes.
This was the boy Gai wanted to marry?
Dai didn’t know much about Kakashi, as the child tended to keep to himself and Sakumo had been very busy recently. What he did know, however, was that Kakashi was quiet, easily annoyed, and preferred things to have a pattern to them. Gai was the opposite in every sense of the word.
“Kakashi-kun? That boy?” Dai knelt down and whispered into Gai’s ear, who started nodding vehemently.
“That boy!” He yelled, forgetting that his father was so close to his face.
“Have you two even spoken before?”
“Nope, but I’m gonna marry him anyway!” Dai laughed again.
“Alright, alright.” He turned toward Kakashi, who was watching them with narrowed, curious eyes. Dai waved at him, and he huffed and turned away, pretending like he was never watching at all. “Why him?”
“Well he’s smart, and pretty, and talented, and pretty, and cool–like, look at that scarf! Only people worthy of marriage wear such hip clothing!” Gai had sparkles in his eyes, and he was gazing at Kakashi like he was the only person that mattered in the world. He was right, Dai supposed, his scarf was very fashionable. He sighed.
“Hey, look at me.” He patted Gai on the cheek gently, trying to get his focus back on him and away from his crush. “When you love someone that much, enough to marry, you keep an eye on them. You watch out for them, protect them.” Such was the case with everyone, but Dai couldn’t help but emphasize the fact with Kakashi. The boy worried him, being such a talented shinobi so young. He knew Konoha was going to work him until there was nothing left. “You find that special person, and you keep them close.” Gai nodded slowly, taking in Dai’s serious tone but not fully understanding the depths to his words.
“Does this mean I have your blessing, then?” Dai smiled, letting the tension ease as his shoulders relaxed.
“Yes. Yes you do.”
***
Though it was a rare feeling, Kakashi could say with certainty that this moment was a happy one.
He was sitting at the counter in front of Gai’s kitchen, watching him cook. He hummed a soft tune as he drifted from the refrigerator to the pot on the stove, adding a little bit of anything and everything. Kakashi himself was rocking back and forth on the chair, something he never let himself do until he knew he was properly safe.
A drop of boiling water splashed Gai, making him shriek and jump back. Kakashi laughed.
“For a shinobi, you have bad reflexes,” Kakashi taunted, continuing his rocking.
“For a shinobi, you talk a lot of crap,” Gai responded, as he tried not to let his laughter seep into his voice. “I am just tired from our challenge–that I won, might I add.”
The challenge was supposed to be a simple race, but Gai was Gai and Kakashi was Kakashi, and things were never as simple as they were supposed to be. After many scrapes, bruises, and pig bites [they had known that Tonton was a force to be reckoned with, but they did not expect his teeth to hurt so much], they returned to Gai’s apartment with him crowned the winner.
“Yeah, yeah, whatever helps you sleep at night.” Gai smiled and shook his head, returning his focus to the stove.
For a while, there was nothing but the sounds of good food cooking and Kakashi’s fabric rustling as he swayed.
“Here,” Gai placed the bowl of rice and curry in front of Kakashi and smiled at him. Not one of his big, overexaggerated grins that could rival the sun, but a soft, genuine smile that showed nothing but love.
“Thank you for the food.”
“Thank you for letting me cook for you.”
Kakashi felt blood rush to his face and a traitorous thought rush to his head.
‘I want to marry this man.’
He shoved it down instantly, warmth and affection replaced by the chill of anxiety. Marriage was no place for a shinobi, especially for two people in the field. It wasn’t illegal, of course, but the toll that it took on both partners was enough; the ever present worry that the other wouldn’t come home, the amount of separation, the thought of living the rest of their life without their spouse. Not that Kakashi hadn’t had those thoughts about Gai before, but marriage was different. Marriage was real and dangerous and an acknowledgment that he would never be okay without him.
Gai squeezed his hand gently, pulling him out of his spiraling thoughts. When Kakashi came back to himself, came back fully to the apartment full of dog hair and the smell of curry, Gai let go. He sat down next to Kakashi and gave himself his own filling of curry, with significantly less vegetables.
Oh how painful it was, to be known and to be loved so much. To be seen in a way worthy of affection, instead of feared. It made Kakashi want to rip his heart out, and it made him want to burst into tears, and it made him want to hug Gai so tightly he would never let go.
Well, ripping his heart out wasn’t exactly a reasonable option, and he had cried far too many tears in his life, so he wrapped his arms around Gai as tightly as he could.
“I love you,” he whispered, wanting so desperately to repay him for everything he had done, for the curry.
“I love you too,” Gai responded without question, without hesitation.
Kakashi decided that if he were to spend an eternity in that room, it wouldn’t be enough. So, he ignored the rest of the outside world, ignored his doubts and fears, and existed in the quiet bubble they created for themselves.
He pulled back because the curry was getting cold and the least he could do was not put it to waste. He pulled down his mask and flapped his hands up and down slightly, as he couldn’t remember a time where he felt so safe and happy and loved.
He caught Gai’s eye, who was smiling at him.
“What?” He tilted his head, unable to keep the defensiveness out of his tone. He knew Gai wouldn’t judge him, but after years of being scrutinized for his strange habits, he couldn’t help but pause.
“It makes me happy when you do that. I like that you know that you’re safe here. Also, it’s very cute!” Kakashi sputtered at that, despite the smile creeping onto his face.
“Cute?! I’m not cute, Gai.”
“You have a dog named Biscuit.”
Instead of conceding, like a rational person, Kakashi instead chucked a fleck of curry at Gai’s face. Gai laughed loudly, tilting his head back.
“Fine, not cute, then. Adorable.”
“That’s even worse!” But Kakashi couldn’t suppress the laugh that escaped his mouth. Gai grabbed his hand and kissed his knuckles.
The thought came again; ‘I’m going to marry this man,’ and this time, Kakashi didn’t push it away.
***
The coil of anxiety was back, and it tore its way through Kakashi’s nervous system. He couldn’t push it away, as much as he tried. His mind kept racing with thoughts of the future.
‘What if he says no? What if he hates me? What if, what if, what if…’
The thud of the tiny ring box inside his Jonin jacket brought him back to reality. He and Gai were walking along a path, hidden from the rest of Konoha. It was the midst of sunset, blazing oranges and pinks dusted the sky, making the entire scene look like a faded daydream. More specifically, one of the many daydreams Kakashi has had about this moment. His palms were never so sweaty in his mind, though.
Gai was also strangely quiet, not helping Kakashi’s anxieties. He seemed deep in thought, and his hand kept reaching into one of his pockets, trying to appear causal but failing miserably.
They finally arrived at their destination, a cliff face that allowed them to look at the entirety of their village, facing the row of Hokages. Kakashi steeled himself with the amount of courage it would take to fight an army, and closed his eyes.
He couldn’t bear to see Gai’s face full of shock and disappointment as he sank onto one knee, couldn’t bear the inevitable conversation that would have to happen after. He pulled out the ring box and opened it.
However, when he opened his eyes, he didn’t see anger or hatred or sadness. Instead, he saw Gai kneeling in front of him, mirroring his pose, with a ring in hand. His eyes were bugging out of his head, mouth agape in his typical over exaggerated way.
“Gai, what…?” Kakashi mumbled, too frightened he would break the illusion if he spoke louder. That was what it was, right? An illusion? Gai would never…
Gai broke out of his shocked stupor and started laughing. It was loud, boisterous, slightly hysterical as tears spilled down his cheeks.
“So it’s a yes?” Gai choked out, throat tight from tears and joy. Their choked silence shattered, and all Kakashi could feel was relief.
“Yes.” Kakashi nodded rapidly as he was finally able to breathe again. He started to laugh, and a few tears welled in his eyes. “Yes, yes, yes.” They both stood up, and Gai caught Kakashi as he stumbled toward him.
He cupped Kakashi’s face with his hands, and was suddenly overcome with the intense urge to spin him around in a circle, like in those cheesy movies where the guy gets the girl and everything turns out perfect in the end.
While their life may not be a movie, and while everything was certainly not going to end perfectly, nobody was watching and nobody cared, so Gai scooped up Kakashi and spun him. Kakashi made a noise of surprise, and laughed once more as Gai put him down.
“You are such a dork.” Kakashi shook his head, looking at him with all of the affection in the world. His Tears dribbled down onto his mask and Gai reached to brush them away.
“You love me anyway.” Gai kissed Kakashi’s forehead, his cheeks, the tip of his nose, and Kakashi pulled down his mask to kiss him on the lips.
When they parted, when they calmed down, when their tears ran dry, they sat intertwined at the edge of the cliff.
“I can’t believe we proposed at the same time,” Kakashi said.
“I guess that means it’s a tie, then.”