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Miss Pauling, after a long conversation with Scout and the other team members, sat tiredly on the edge of a concrete cliff among the ruins, somewhere away from the center of events. She wanted to explain everything to herself.
Everything seemed to be clear. The administrator did not speak. She wasn't sure if the engineer's words were true. Could the administrator actually have died at such a moment? What if it was because of her and her failure to fulfill her mission? She had a flurry of similar thoughts that blended together. Her actions and their consequences never gave her peace of mind.
In a few hours, a plane should arrive to pick them up. She had nothing to do with herself. All she could do now was wait for some miracle. Or for another call from the engineer.
Scout, too, was lost all over the place as well as in the situation, not knowing what to do with himself and tingling all over the robotic debris, back and forth. He ran away from the medic as soon as he found out what kind of pen he had created. Until he finally spotted Miss Pauling alone.
He figured this was his chance to have a longer conversation after all this traveling. He never knew when their contact would break off again and they would end up on the phone talking about the whole mysterious mission, the next steps and all her orders which he would never disobey.
He approached her quietly. He sat behind her, looking ahead at the starry sky mixed with the last rays of the sun. He put his hands in his pockets and enjoyed the view.
“Eyyy... how's it going?” He said.
Miss Pauling raised her head slightly.
“Ah. Hey Scout.” She replied in monotone.
There was an awkward silence which was promptly broken by Scout's concerned voice.
“H-hey are you all right Miss Pauling? Because I'm so, well I think eh.”
Miss Pauling quickly turned her head, interrupting him and said nervously:
“No no no I'm fine, it's fantastic, it's just what I need right now. It's great. I can handle it.”
Scout unsteadily, with one step, approached the end of the concrete bridge and swayed on its edge.
“Oh well. I thought you needed some help or something.”
“I think you need the Medic's help more with that big wound.” She said pointing to his bandage.
“Ah that... I'll be fine if you're so worried about me.” He said laughing quietly at his outstanding joke.
Miss Pauling pinched her forehead with one hand, resting her elbow on her knee as she squatted a short distance away. Already she was beginning to feel a latent migraine from him talking.
“I just wanted to say that… I wanted to ask…” He began to stammer, “It's nice to see you again Miss Pauling.”
“Yes yes, Scout. It's nice to see you too.” She replied with reluctance.
She clearly didn’t want to talk anymore. Especially with Scout, who comes up with new pick-up lines every now and then. He never left her side, even in her thoughts. She still has his goofy smile in front of her eyes. She seems to remember every silly compliment he’d said to her. Was it genuine sincerity from him? Or is he just doing the same thing he does with every girl he meets?
Rubbish and nonsense, she thought. Miss Pauling adhered to the principle that she could not socialize with team members to this extent. Why should she care why he behaves this way toward her? Once again, she addressed what she had addressed before. On what they all actually have in common - work.
“Heavy told me that you care a lot about Australium and all that. I myself don't understand what's going on here, but don't worry, I'll do whatever it takes. If you give me such an order, of course.”
She just looked with sparkling eyes in his direction and looked down again. She wasn't the only one who had this feeling. She had completely forgotten that she was not alone in all this. The whole team could suffer the consequences of her choices. This depressed her even more.
In that spare moment, he moved closer. He hesitated while extending his hand to her. He felt a little guilty, by the expression on her face. He thought it was because of him that she was disappointed. He took a deep exhale and changed the subject to something more neutral.
“Hm. You know what, I'm starving, how ‘bout you? The last meal I ate was in Siberia, at Fatty's. Besides, the Pyro made a bonfire not far away. I think the guys are planning to fry up something.”
He paused to look at her. Confused, she didn't respond or turn around. She was so calm, soiled in crimson blood along with her ruined hairstyle. She had something that took his breath away. He had never met a woman like her in his life, and he valued that above life.
“And aren't you hungry? When did you last eat something? You know, if you are hungry.”
“Are you going to try to feed me chicken?” She asked with irritation in her voice.
“Ehh… Actually, I didn't mean that.”
He fell silent for a brief moment to quickly think over his next sentences so as not to ruin the exchange completely.
“Rather, maybe something more celebratory. You know, to celebrate the victory and so on. All in all, forget about it, there's no point anyway.” Scout, embarrassed, turned his gaze away.
“Out of sheer curiosity, can I ask what you and Spy were on about for so long?” He said with the most acting hunger he could muster now through the pain in his chest.
“Nothing in particular. Well, you know, he gave me some valuable advice.”
“Oh ok, that's good.”
He wanted to ask something already, raising his index finger but refrained by closing his mouth. Already thoughts were coming to him that the Spy might have told her some mischief or worse, picked on her. He even had his fist clenched tightly at that thought already. For a moment you could see the grimace on his face.
“It was a pure business conversation, you don't have to be jealous about it. I had a lot to do.”
She smiled slightly at him.
He only sighed. She had him at a fork. Small, cocky and jealous. However, he had an idea how to slip out of it gracefully.
“I'm not jealous, what should I be jealous of when you're focusing your attention on me now?”
“You reminded me that I shouldn't. Thanks.”
“So you're saying you've been busy?” He said interrupting this thread.
“Well, yes. I had to struggle to find a sniper. But fortunately we got along but then.”
Miss Pauling interrupted. She remembered the Australium which was now flying somewhere in space. A rocket along with a drunk woman inside. Her face looked dazed and stiff. She quickly corrected a strand of black hair and cut herself off as quickly as she could.
She herself didn't know why she didn't want to explore the subject further. Maybe because Scout wouldn't understand it anyway or maybe she didn't want to interrupt the flow of this pleasant conversation? Maybe she didn't want to lose his sweet voice which was now tuned like strings. Maybe it was a radical thought but she wanted to continue this conversation. Listening to his voice like in an opera.
“Then what was happening in Siberia? Were there any problems?” She said with interest.
“So. In Siberia. It was cold. I think that was the only problem. And yes, the Soldier was a problem. He didn't take any warm clothes and told us to go through the mountains on foot. The idiot still made me eat several dozen jars of honey. Pyro fortunately did not cut off anyone's hand except for killing one bear.”
“This is. Very interesting.” She was still surprised at what Soldier comes up with when he is alone, even though she knew him inside out.
life.
“Well, tell me honestly, wouldn't it annoy you if he always squatted flat on the air at the first best opportunity?”
“Maybe a little?”
“Well, that's right. We don’t even need to mention what he did today. That image will be burned into my brain for the rest of my life.”
They both flinched in disgust at the same moment.
“It really was an experience.” She said.
“In addition, he did it while still in Siberia. From such a way he sat in the kitchen of a fat man smeared in honey, wasn't it disgusting?”
“It was out of place but…”
“So you don't like him either?”
“What, no I didn't say anything like that.” She replied.
“No kidding, no one likes him.”
“But he's a soldier, what can we do about it?”
“I don't pay attention to such things. For me, he will remain an idiot anyway.”
“It reminds me of another person…” She replied tartly.
“I may be stupid, but I am certainly better and sweeter than the whole team put together.”
“So clear. You always have the best opinion of yourself.”
“What can I say, I’m a gift from God. I even talked with him.” He said proudly.
He started waving his legs with happiness, when she just shrugged her shoulders with a wry look on her face.
“I think they were hallucinations.” She answered coldly.
“Hallucinations?”
“You’ve been in a bad state, your brain’s playing tricks on you.”
“So what? Is Tom Jones not real either?”
“You saw him too?”
“Oh yes, Miss Pauling, do I have to tell you he’s my father, freakin amazing right?”
“I don’t think it’s possible, but I’m really glad to hear.” She said, recalling how she had to intervene to save a soldier from the police. again.
“It’s just unimaginable, right? Such a wonderful man is my father. I think I already see a connection between us.”
He ignored the reasonable answers and did not want to come to the obvious conclusions that surrounded him lately. He wouldn’t even point out that the snake fucked him and played a big prank. And even worse, being his father. He couldn’t let that thought get to him, even though he could tell her about his fears. But he moved the subject to another conversation.
“Do you remember the last robot missions? Six months ago? Or what happened a few years ago?”
“Yes certainly, I did not at all flip millions of copies of files and documents throughout the year.”
“And with one day off, I still remember that bread monster, the stupid Soldier and his teleporters.”
“Ah, that incident.”
She smiled lightly at the thought of the adrenaline rush that accompanied her then. She recalled it as quite good entertainment. She loved experiencing such adventures. However, in the context of an important mission for her, she could not afford to enjoy such moments. At any moment she could be murdered by robots and she was completely out of rhythm. To make matters worse, she didn't have a concrete plan with her.
“You were wowed then.” He sighed with relief in his voice.
“Yes. It was nice but it ended too fast.”
“Your busy time is over, which means that–”
“We are still in the middle of this mess so you still have to wait.”
“Haha, you are always so clever Miss Pauling, are you reading minds?”
“I've known you for 6 years now, I guess that's enough time to draw simple conclusions from every conversation with you.” She said mischievously.
“Your life would be much duller. Without me.”
“Maybe.” She said.
“Your life was boring anyway because of the paperwork so…”
She didn't speak but still had a smile on her face. Scout took this as a good sign and that his conversation was helpful. His heart started beating faster and blood was pumping. He felt as if heat was gathering on his face.
Suddenly there was a loud bang that shook them both up. They turned behind them toward the sound. They could hear Scottish curses and the bell-strong voice of an australian.
“What are they doing out there?” Miss Pauling asked.
“Wait wait wait, they’re just making a bonfire, don't go anywhere ok?”
“Actually, I don't plan to go there, I have too much of a headache.”
“Right, you don't have to worry about them Miss Pauling, you have done enough for us today, I appreciate it. You deserve a rest.” He sounded concerned and scared.
“Em, well, thank you.”
He didn't hear a word from her about the fact that he should walk at least two miles away from her. No buts. It calmed him down enough to take a breath again.
“Nice night, feels somehow lighter.”
“Yes, it is nice.” He replied.
He still had this strange pain in his chest that did not let up. His rapidly beating heart didn’t make it any better. Until a rather dangerous and risky thought assailed him.
“You know what. I've noticed that things have changed terribly.”
“It's hard not to notice.” She confirmed with sadness.
“Jeez, so many things have happened in such a short time. I was just about to be hanged but you saved me. Then some wild Siberia and still that stupid mountain in Australia. Now we are still in the middle of-”
“Nothing.”
“Yeah. There's nothing here. There are these robots pounding everywhere.”
“And all this in a few days. I've pretty much lost track of time.” Leaning his palms against the concrete surface, he continued talking. “But you know. I don't just mean these days but. I think I have also changed over the years.”
He looked away waiting for her reaction in concentration. His heart was beating in such a way that he could power an entire power plant with it. He felt as if it was about to jump at the thought of what might happen if he ran it right.
Miss Pauling rose slightly and corrected her strand of hair by putting it behind her ear. Unconsciously, she forgot all her work - Induced despondency. With a calm, innocent smile, she replied.
“Why do you think so?”
“I just. Eh, I don't know how to describe it.”
He moved his hand closer to her flat palm. He wanted to try to touch the top of it with his index finger but hesitated when she started to straighten up.
“I think it's because of you. Well, because you see, you are really a wonderful, smart, beautiful woman and also whenever I say this I am not joking.”
Miss Pauling curiously did not interrupt his speech. She thought he looked silly now, which made her laugh quite a bit, but still, she wanted to hear the end of his dialogue.
“I think you are special and when I am next to you.”
“Continue.” She said, slightly leaning sideways to hear him better.
He began to panic. He thought for a moment "Is she really implying something?" "Is she making fun of me?" "Or does she want to hear it for real after all?" Well, it was clear that her pose was ambiguous. In addition, she did not react to where his hand was going. The rush of his thoughts was so strong that he began to stumble over the vowels.
“I. When. When I am next to you I feel something inside. And in no way is it my wound, don't worry about it.”
She only laughed while covering her mouth with her hand and turning away from him. Miss Pauling excitedly couldn't believe the silliness of the situation. She herself could not believe what was happening now. It wasn't her.
He only became even more confused, her laughter was an unusual rarity. He didn't know whether he was supposed to take it as encouragement or as proof of his theory about how Spy was groping him behind his back.
“Are you sure you want to hear this Miss Pauling?” He asked just to be sure.
“Yes I am sure of it. And rest assured I won't laugh about it.”
“Then why are you laughing when I'm serious?”
“No it's not because of you, not at all.” She said immediately.
He scratched the back of his neck with his hand and bit his lower lip through the tension between them.
“Damn. I know you don't have time to meet with me but no matter what I do, I'd like to be with you as long as possible.”
He decided to deftly and imperceptibly move his fingertips toward her laid back hand. Miss Pauling looked away and seemed to be in tune with the turn of events. Internally, she was increasingly amused by his helplessness and already wanted to help him out as usual.
“I've had enough of this waiting. I would like to tell you that. I. I. I really like you. This is something like what I feel for my Mom but this. It is much stronger and clearer.”
Miss Pauling looked at him with a wry smile, refraining from laughing. Scout reciprocated this with a blush that appeared on his face from ear to ear. Looking at her, his mouth was open, unable to choke out a single word or letter.
Without restraint he fully placed his hand on her flat hand. He was clouded by her beautiful, dirty face which she focused on him for the first time in a long time. Scout couldn't see the world beyond her. He couldn't for all his travels stop worrying about her. They would get stuck in that feeling, and for good.
Miss Pauling, despite his stupid actions which he always caused and which she had to control, thought of him. She had no words for him. He was silly and annoying, and at the same time had that boyish charm about him.
It had been so long since they had seen each other. She decided she had to give him this one chance. For the rest, she herself felt that she wanted to hear it, even from him.
“What is it then?” She asked with a strange note in her voice.
“I think it's… I-”
Scout slowly approached her face trying to take a step. He wanted to gently brush back her hair, fix her glasses and feel the feeling fully along with her dry lips. No one was around. Just him and her. It looked like the perfect moment.
Unfortunately, at that moment the phone started ringing from the engineer who had been next door the whole time.
The phone call immediately blurred that dream and took Panel Pauling down to earth. So did Scout's hope, deep underground. She rose immediately from her seat and grabbed the phone nervously. She walked away for a few steps saying only.
“Wait a minute, I'll be right back.”
Then she started talking to the engineer and her nerves and fears returned, giving her a small ray of foolish joy to forget.
Scout sat like a beaten dog giving his eyes behind her as she disappeared towards the team. It was too late to tell her. He had already lost his tongue to the end.
She left him alone. He sat as if turned to stone in the background of the dark night. He felt as if his warmth in his heart was drastically sinking.
Now he really hated the waiting tactic.