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suho is waiting patiently after knocking on the door, holding his helmet under his arm. when the door finally opens and reveals a tired sieun, he steps inside without saying a word and drops his helmet on the floor.
at this point it's a habit to stop by sieun's house whenever he works part time as a delivery. suho thinks those few minutes where he clicks on pause in his life for a moment and chats with sieun about nothing important in particular, are one of the best moments. he doesn't want to admit it but he's just as lonely because of his busy life. sieun is his only friend and he wouldn't change that for anything.
he doesn't even notice something is off as he's about to open his mouth to ask for a glass of water - when all train of thoughts leave him speechless as he sees sieun staggering a bit and the empty glasses of soju on the table behind him.
sieun reaches for the wall, never leaving his eyes off suho and taking deep breaths as if to calm himself and suho frowns because sieun's expression is a mix of sadness and shock, like he can't believe suho is here for real.
suho doesn't remember seeing sieun drunk ever, he's the type that can drink well and this time it's not any different. he might be tipsy but suho knows he doesn't overdo it because he doesn't like not remembering what happened in the next morning.
sieun closes his eyes and shakes his head like a dog getting wet in the rain and suho has to stifle a laugh, sieun is so cute.
"where the hell have you been?" is what he finally says to break the silence and suho is left confused again.
he tilts his head, "what do you mean?"
"i'm going to fucking punch you."
sieun looks at his face then, as if he wants to carve every single detail onto his brain. suho feels his face heating up under the intensity of sieun's deep gaze and it's not fair because sieun's eyes are his favorite thing in the world. suho could swear sieun can make anyone fall in love with him with just a simple eye contact.
suho brings his cold hands up to his warm cheeks, suddenly feeling very hot despite it being chilly outside. "ah, where is my glass of water? my throat is so dry." he says, attempting to lighten the tense atmosphere and looking at everything and everywhere besides sieun.
sieun still doesn't reply but suho can still feel his eyes on him. luckily, he disappears a short while after and suho feels like he can breathe again. he fans himself, feeling stupid and trying to make his heart beat in a normal rhythm. resting his head against the wall, he exhales loudly.
of fucking course he has to have a crush on his only one friend in his life out of everyone.
sieun returns with a bottle of water soon after, this time not bothering to bring a glass which suho won't use anyways.
suho smiles appreciatively at him, reaching for the bottle. but sieun doesn't allow him to, he takes a step back and the bottle out of his reach. suho thinks the alcohol must be getting to him.
sieun brings the bottle to his lips and takes a few sips while suho just stands there awkwardly, watching him. he notices sieun never gulps when he puts the bottle down and closes the distance between them in quick strides. sieun is all over his personal space suddenly, standing up on his tiptoes, pinning him up against the wall and kissing him.
kissing him? suho can feel the water on his own mouth now, the way it drips from the corner of his mouth down his neck and he squeezes his eyes shut, grabbing at the hem of sieun's (beloved) oversized gray jacket.
he suddenly wished sieun punched him for real instead. nothing could prepare him for this outcome.
suho tries to blame the unusual behaviour of sieun to the alcohol, but he knows that's not the case. he knows sieun always remembers. he knows sieun would never do something he doesn't want to.
and want he does. sieun doesn't even let him breathe, tilting his head to deepen the kiss and capturing suho's bottom lip between his lips, sucking and nipping at them. suho opens his mouth to kiss him back just as hungrily and he's glad he's pushed against the wall or else his legs would completely give up on him.
as soon as he opens his mouth, sieun teases him with the tip of his tongue, swirling them around suho's own. he doesn't think twice before exploring his mouth completely, sucking on his tongue and suho can taste the bitter taste of soju and sieun's own taste that's making his head spin. sieun has one hand on his neck and the other in his hair, pulling lightly. suho lets out an embarassing noise at that which sieun swallows down.
suho never expected a kiss could make him feel all kinds of things. he thinks this is his proper first kiss, because he finds out it's entirely different doing it with someone you love. he finally understands the description of fireworks in romance novels.
sieun breaks the kiss to catch his breath and suho finally opens his eyes. he knows they are hooded though and feels even more crazy seeing how flushed (not only from drinking) sieun's face is and how he still has his eyes closed.
suho is the one leaning in this time but he changes the pace entirely, kissing sieun slow and deep as their lips meet in a soft and gentle caress. suho cards his finger through sieun's hair as he breathes him in, hoping his passion and all the feelings he can't form in coherent sentences convey through his kiss.
suho lets their foreheads touch after coming down from their high and sieun caresses his still wounded lips from one of the many fights they had lately with his thumb. he feels something salty and hears a sniffing sound and immediately opens his eyes.
sieun is crying. and he looks like he could break down any minute. suho feels his heart breaking into a thousand pieces.
"never leave me again. please."
there it is again. suho doesn't understand as much as he wants to.
"i'm begging you. you're the only one i have in my life... i can't lose you." sieun tries to wipe away his tears but it's no use, they keep on falling. he seems used to it, though.
suho wants to answer, say something, anything. but his voice seems to be lost. it won't come out. he wants to make the pain in sieun's eyes and voice stop, wants to burn down the whole world for taking away sieun's precious smile.
"don't leave me, suho. i love you."
sieun kisses his eyes then, and it's the last thing suho remembers before he blinks and opens his eyes to a room too light, too different from where he just had been.
he feels his fingers twitching, his head pounding and trying to make sense of his surroundings but he can't. he feels a tear slipping down his eye.
"the patient opened his eyes. call the doctor immediately!"
there's a soft beep, beep sound coming next to him and suho realises.
he can barely see his grandmother smiling through her tears, holding his hand tightly and running her hands through his hair.
but all he can think of is the void he's feeling in his heart.
"sieun..." he whispers weakly, all strength seeming to left his body.
it's his first word after being in a coma for a year.