Chapter Text
Ponyboy was confused.
Sitting in the dirt, cold, wet and shivering. The smell of vomit not too far, along with a still body. He felt numb, he felt scared. Had Johnny really killed that boy?
“You really killed him, huh, Johnny.” His voice was trembling, similar to his hands. What was it they called it? Going into shock? Ponyboy didn’t doubt that's what was happening to him.
Johnny stood, not too far away from Pony (or the dead soc). He was fidgeting with the switchblade in his blood covered hand, “Yeah.” Johnny sounded so hesitant and sure at the same time. As if he couldn’t believe it himself.
“They-” Johnny stuttered, inhaling a breath of air as he dropped to his knees, digging a hole in the grass. “They was gonna kill ya Ponyboy! I couldn’t- I told myself if they-… I couldn’ let’em kill ya, not you.”
Ponyboy processed the words, stealing himself. He breathed in a few shaky breaths. Digging his fingers into his arms. Looking up from under his bangs of wet hair, he saw Johnny burying his switchblade. He was real twitchy-like while doing it too, nervous.
Standing up slowly, Pony walked over to Johnny and crouched in the dirt near him. “Johnny, hey, Johnnycake,” Pony called, trying to get the boy’s attention. He was all over the place, eyes frantic and blown wide.
Johnny hesitantly looked at Pony’s face, avoiding his eyes. “Listen Johnnycake, we gonna get through this, but we gotta go. We gotta get goin soon, before the fuzz show, a’right?” Pony did his best to be comforting, his hand finding Johnny’s shoulder. The older boy’s breath seemed to even out as he thought.
“Dally,” was all Johnny said. A look in his eyes that Pony couldn’t quite place at the moment.
“…What?”
“We gotta find Dally. He’ll know what’ta do, won’ he?”
‘He would know what to do,’ Ponyboy thought as he nodded and stood up, helping Johnny up with him. “Ok, ok, let's go find Dally. ‘m sure he’s at Shepherds”
Johnny nodded and led the way, his and Pony’s pace quickly speeding up to a run.
And as they ran, maybe for a moment, even just a second. Pony could pretend they were ok. That they were running from a shop, rather than a dead body. After Two bit got caught trying to snatch something and the owner chased them out. The three of them would be laughing as they ran as quickly as they could. Two bit grinning as he flashed what he could nab before getting caught.
And he almost believed it. Almost.
Because they weren’t running from a shop. They were running from a dead soc. Running from the fountain that was now a pale red. Where Ponyboy would’ve drowned had it not been for Johnny. Johnny murdered a boy.
And, oh- Ponyboy could barely believe it. Johnny, the scared kicked puppy. The pet of the gang. He ended a life. And wasn’t that funny?
Before Pony could continue down his spiral he and Johnny were at Tim Shepherds. The sounds of a party blasting. Loud music, and red light streaming through the windows.
Banging at the door loudly, Pony breathed in deeply. Tim came to the door and Johnny told him they needed to see Dally. Tim didn’t put up much of a fight but he reluctantly shut the door and moments later came the shirtless Dallas Winston.
“What is it,” he drawled, voice scratchy. Then Pony remembered what it was exactly that happened in the rooms of these parties.
“We need your help- we- I,” Johnny stuttered, still shaken up. Dally pursed his lips as he grabbed the two and shut the door behind them. Dragging the two younger boys up the stars, Dallas turned to Pony.
“Jeez kid, why’re ya so wet? It‘s freezing out there! You catch hypothermia n’ Darry’ll have my hide,” he said. Pushing Pony on the bed and fishing for a (probably) clean shirt. He threw it at the boy, “Put this on.”
Pony did as instructed as Dally looked at Johnny with a pointed gaze. “So? What happened that y'all two need my help with?”
“Uhm,” Johnny collected his thoughts. Pony noticed the patience Dally had for the boy that he had for no one else. “We- me and Pony- were at the park and- and these Socs, some of the same ones that- that jumped me that time.”
With the clean, dry shirt on, Pony too also looked at Johnny. Curious how he’d tell the story. He was sure Dally knew where it was headed, or at least a vague idea, considering he had literal blood on his hands and clothes.
“They was- they was holdin’ Pony under the water and he- he was gonna die, Dal. They was about t’ kill ’em so I… I stabbed him. He- he’s dead now and all the others ran,” he explained.
Dally had a blank look on his face. “Ok, how long has it been since they ran?” Dally asked, turning and rummaging through drawers. Finding a wade of cash and a gun that glinted in the low light of the room.
Johnny thought for a moment. “‘m not sure, fifteen-twenty minutes?”
“Good. C’mere Johnnycake,” Dally said, sitting next to Pony on the bed. Johnny came over and Dally handed him the gun. “Here’s fifty dollars and a loaded gun. There's an abandoned church on Jay mountain in Windrixville. I need you two to take the train there, buy a week's worth of food and supplies. then go into the church. Don’t so much as stick your nose out the front door, ya hear me? You’ll have some time, but not much, before the story gets out.”
Pony and Johnny nodded at the words, taking them all in and committing them to memory.
“I’ll be down in a few days. The fuzz’ll think it was me first so that’ll buy you some extra time. Now scram,” Dally ordered. Pushing the wad of cash into Pony and pushing the two out the door.
Walking out the house, Ponyboy turned to look at Johnny as they walked toward the train. He returned the boys gaze and Pony couldn’t help but notice that there was so much hidden in those dark eyes of his. Giving his friend a strained smile that didn’t reach his eyes, Pony hoped things would blow over quickly.
Finding the train, the two friends sat beside each other. Unoticingly snuggling closer for heat. The engine growled to life as the train slowly picked up speed, the beginning of a journey they didn’t have much choice in. Before the first three miles were over Pony’s head had found its way onto Johnny’s shoulder and his eyes grew heavy with exhaustion. He was quickly asleep.
—☆-☆-☆—
Johnny looked down at the head of his best friend, now on his lap after something in the track jostled the car. His hair looked soft and puffy. Johnny felt the strong urge to pet it.
He looked so peaceful, and a lot like his brother, Soda. His features all relaxed and handsome. Johnny’s face screwed up as reality came crashing down onto him.
He killed someone. It was to save Ponyboy, but he killed someone. He hardly felt regret for it though. If he had to choose between another soc and Ponyboy, he was sure he’d make the same choice.
Johnny knew he’d do anything to protect the younger boy sleeping peacefully in his lap.
Still staring at his peaceful features, Johnny frowned lightly. “‘m sorry,” he mumbled to the sleeping figure. And he was. He didn’t mean for this to happen, he was sure the last thing Ponyboy wanted was to be stuck with him for lord knows how long.
But as long as he’s safe. As long as Ponyboy was still breathing, Johnny would risk anything. Even his own life.