Chapter Text
The doctor massaged her throat, feeling the lump wedged in her windpipe.
“Eh, it happens to the best of us,” Psychopomp said with a shrug. “I’m sure you’ve got questions, bub. I’m here to listen if you wanna ask.”
“Shinigami,” she asked despite the shrimp in her larynx. “Do you ever feel upset at what you do?”
For once, Psychopomp didn’t breathe in the smoke of their cigar.
“You take away billions, don’t you feel sad about it?”
They smacked the cigar with two fingers, knocking off the ashes.
“...On occasion.”
They let the cigar fade into mist, instead conjuring a bottle of beer from the void, cap already popped.
“When I take the last of a species. Tasmanian tiger, dodo, little beetles and frogs, brontosaurus…”
They paused to take a sip. Their burning eyes were focused on the charm that dangled from the rearview mirror. It was a little black arthropod, with two antennae, ovular in shape, segmented like an armadillo.
“The one I can’t stop thinkin’ of, though, is the trilobites.”
They were still pretty new to all this, when you took it into perspective. This planet was still in its mewling infancy, in terms of life, and Psychopomp spent more time stumbling around in the water than ferrying souls.
Not like there was much conversation to be had, anyway.
In their hands they held millions of little souls, squirming single celled organisms in a pool of otherworldly water. The endlings of Rafatazmia chitrakootensis, all gathered in their hands.
“So that’s it for you, huh?”
Tears fell from the burning compound eyes of the guide.
“I’m so sorry. You did so well.”
They sobbed, their ichor tears dripping into the little pool.
“I’m so proud of you.”
Gently, carefully, they poured the pool into the eternal sea, its water evaporating before it touched the salt water. The souls of the bacteria evaporated away, to whatever was next.
Even they didn’t know, at least not right now, of where they were off to.
“Take care.”
A strange little being nuzzled up to their bare foot.
“Oh, hey.”
Psychopomp picked up the little creature. It was covered in a hard chitin, squirming its many little legs and wiggling its antennae.
“You’re a new one.”
Carefully, they placed the little beast under their arm.
“Let’s get you on, then.”
Psychopomp walked along the water’s surface, the waves splashing around them.
Behind them, a procession of strange animals, some spiked and some swimming in the sky. Some with compound eyes, some with no eyes at all. One in particular sat in their arms, another little chitinous beast.
“So, you all haven’t been up here, have you?” They asked to the little parade.
As expected, no response.
“I wonder how hard it is to comprehend a world like this. One without water, where you stay on the flattest surface.”
The sun broke over the horizon.
“Looks like it’s time for you all to go on.”
Gently, they placed the arthropod on the water’s surface. It crawled towards the sun, the congregation of animals following behind.
“Safe travels, you lot!”
It was like this for a long time, a few million years or so.
Taking beings that succumbed to the law of the jungle on to the sunrise.
It wasn’t a bad gig.
The sun set with Psychopomp standing on dry land.
Tears, more than they’d ever cried, streamed down their face as they looked at today’s job.
It was all of them.
Everything.
So many at once had died.
Millions, perhaps billions, of beings stood with them now, unspeaking.
And Psychopomp remained still and wept.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, all of you,” they sobbed, their knees giving out.
Their burning eyes couldn’t take all of the gazes at once.
“You didn’t deserve that, none of you did.”
Another little one, a tiny chitinous beast, felt for their hand with an antenna.
“I’m so proud of all of you. You did such a good job,” they pet the arthropod’s head with one hand, wiping their tears with the other.
The sun rose behind them as they continued to weep.
Tens of thousands of species leapt past them, going into the sun.
All but one.
The little bug.
Psychopomp’s ichor tears dripped down to the dry land.
“You… you’re not gonna go?”
The beast crawled, gently, into their lap.
Psychopomp only laughed through their sobs.
“You gotta go on sometime, little guy,” they scolded without malice in their heart.
Sometime would come, eventually - but the little trilobite could stay, for a while.
Their breathing shook as they finished their tale.
“Shinigami…”
Psychopomp breathed in, and sighed. They tapped the little trilobite charm dangling from the rearview mirror with the lip of their bottle.
“Little dudes were the first ones to really look at me. To see me and think, that’s someone safe.”
Their bottle was empty, and had been for a while.
“I don’t know where all those early beings went off to. I like to think it’s somewhere nice. But…”
The bottle changed into a cigar once more.
“Where do you go when you exist before the concept of ‘somewhere else’?”
The doctor did not answer.
Psychopomp took a long, slow drag of their cigar.
“Oh, well. I’m sure wherever they went, they weren’t in pain.”
They sighed out the purple smoke and gently pressed the brake, bringing the taxi to a stop.
“Kinda defeats the purpose, doesn’t it?”
The door opened for the doctor, and the shrimp evaporated in her throat, freeing her airway.
“Let’s get you on, then.”