Work Text:
Kaveh moved out of the house when he was finally able to pay off his debt and find a new house. Alhaitham stared at his retreating back, hands hidden behind him, tightly clutching onto the keys that once belonged to Kaveh.
He will come back, Alhaitham thought with a hint of desperation. He will come home.
Alhaitham could not understand the itch he felt whenever he thought of his former roommate. It burned his chest and it hurt a lot. Alhaitham didn't like this kind of pain, where it might never heal like any other physical wound. It would stay there at every ticking moment until the young Haravatat addressed it. However, addressing the issue would mean having to accept the fact that Kaveh was gone. He left. He walked away from Alhaitham, again. Just like the day of their fallout back in their Akademiya days. Often he wondered if the reason why people left him behind was that he was cursed to be unlovable for the rest of his life. Marked a month after Kaveh's moving out, Alhaitham opted to write things down. Every night he would write in his book about anything that came up to his head about the blond architect.
Day 1: 'Kaveh's favourite food is pita pocket.'
Day 2: 'Kaveh is cute when he is angry.'
Day 3: 'Kaveh has a brilliant mind. Debating with him is always an enjoyable activity.'
Day 4: 'Kaveh is the most beautiful person I have ever met.'
Day 5: 'Kaveh has the biggest heart. Often a fool but he is the kindest person to walk this land.'
Day 10: 'Kaveh once wanted a cat but I told him no because no one would be able to care for it since we are two busy individuals. I hate his sad face. From that day onwards, I vowed to never deny him anything (within reasonable negotiation).'
Day 20: 'The house is too silent without Kaveh. He is the light that brightens up my day and... he is no longer here... I miss him.'
Day 30: 'The Wanderer had a sad look in his eyes today. He and I had grown close lately. He told me I'm breaking. I have no idea what it means. I'm fine... Aren't I?'
Day 31: 'I can no longer recognise myself when I saw my reflection earlier. I always pride myself to be Kaveh's mirror... I am no longer able to be that. Maybe The Wanderer is right after all.'
He brought Kaveh's keys everywhere with him, even to the office while he was still the Acting Grand Sage. He would stare at it when there was no one in his office, thumbing the lion gently with a small smile. Every day he hoped that Kaveh would come to him and tell him that he missed Alhaitham just as the other had missed him, and come back so that they can go back to the way it was before. He didn't dare to pray to Nahida. Instead, he prayed to King Deshret. At least, the dead could not hear him. He prayed that Kaveh would come home. He prayed that when he returned to his house, Kaveh would sit there by the door, waiting for him to open the door. He prayed that Kaveh missed him the way he did. He prayed that Kaveh loves him just as much as Alhaitham did. He prayed. He prayed until he drove himself to the brink of insanity.
He didn't know what happened except from the fact that he was kidnapped on his way home and that it had been a few days since that happened. And also, the fact that he was in the middle of the desert. He was held down by some Eremites and a scholar was talking about something that Alhaitham didn't bother to listen to until he took something, dangling it to his face. "How dare you didn't listen to a single word I say!" the teenager barked. "Maybe I should destroy this useless thing. That will definitely be interesting."
"No!" Alhaitham screamed, struggling against the strong arms of the Eremites. He couldn't move to save himself. His body felt sluggish and heavy as if drugged. The scholar from Liyue whose project Alhaitham rejected because of the improper research that hired the Eremites, Zayin, laughed as he stood in front of Alhaitham tauntingly, where the Acting Grand Sage was forced onto his knees. In the Eremite's hand were Kaveh's keys, Alhaitham's precious item.
"I noticed you keep bringing this with you everywhere even though you have your own keys. I watched you, Acting Grand Sage," Zayin spat. "You made so many enemies during the time you become the Acting Grand Sage" he tsked. "I found out that this once belonged to your roommate, yes? That Light of Kshahrewar guy? He has a pretty face, I have to admit. Maybe I should try him-"
"You touch a single strand of hair on him, I will end you!" Alhaitham roared, all logical reasons vanished in the midst of his fury.
"Not if I end you first, pet. Watch and learn, Alhaitham. Watch. And. Learn," Zayin grinned and to Alhaitham's horror, he placed the keys on the flat stone and smashed it to pieces using a hammer. He watched as if in slow motion as the keys along with the lion keychain Alhaitham had gifted Kaveh shattered and his spirit... shattered with them.
Alhaitham sat there, shaken and pale, in the arms of the perverted Eremites. He barely listened to what Zayin whispered in his ear, barely feeling the hands of the Eremites on his numbed body. "Have fun, pet," the Liyuen chuckled darkly and kissed Alhaitham's wet cheek.
He hadn't realised he was crying until one of the Eremites forcefully kissed him. It was revolting. It was repulsive. The kiss Zayin left on his cheek burned as if someone had poured acid on him. The hands roaming his body left thousands of ants crawling on his skin. He's not coming home, Alhaitham said to himself in his head subconsciously, succumbed to the hands that belonged to anyone but Kaveh.
Kaveh wouldn't be able to go home, Alhaitham thought brokenly, barely feeling the pain due to the aphrodisiac they had forced him to swallow sometime ago. Kaveh wouldn't be able to get in the house. What if it rains? What if it's cold and Kaveh had to wait outside for him to come? It's cold. He'll have a fever, the man whined softly when he felt a graze to his prostate, pulling him out of his thoughts. He looked around blearily, barely processing the feeling of his body being used for others' sickened pleasure. He didn't know how many days passed but it didn't matter. None of it mattered anymore.
Kaveh won't come back, he realised with a sense of horror once the information truly processed in his head. He felt like he was having reality dysphoria in his head. The cold splashed against him like a wake-up call, jolting him out of his reverie. The dysphoric feeling crawled from his chest to his throat, making him choke and cry. He cried the way he never cried before, wailing and sobbing. The dam had broken, leaving Alhaitham shaken once again. The man that was fucking the broken young man forced him to ride his cock. He felt his chapped lips being kissed roughly and he...
He kissed back.
Kaveh won't... come home... he thought. Why bother with anything anymore? No one is waiting for him to come home. He had no friends.
No one... cared.
I'm all alone.
He's gone.
He doesn't love you.
He didn't stay.
He left.
He walked away.
He-
I give up.
You won, Zayin.
I gave up.
Alhaitham felt himself drowned with the feeling of overwhelming despair. He didn't notice how his mind, that once prided at remembering things, was starting to forget a few memories little by little the more he enjoyed being so cruelly, horrendously dehumanising. He whimpered, unable to move a single muscle when the Eremite whispered filthy things in his ears, licking his sensitive earlobe and biting them. "So beautiful like this, wrapped around my cock. Aren't you a whore?" he laughed, pinching and pulling Alhaitham's nipples, toying with them until it hurt so badly. He nodded, taking everything that was given to him.
Sounds of terrified screams and battle cry suddenly echoed the entire place. The Eremite didn't even ceased his fucking, instead increasing his pace, making Alhaitham mewled until he came inside his loose hole and the other on his own chest.
The tent was ripped open at that moment and Alhaitham heard his name yelled with such emotion that he was unable to comprehend. Horrified? Maybe. The Eremite was killed without hesitation and Cyno's face came into view as he cradled him gently in his embrace. Alhaitham screamed when he felt Cyno's hands on him, sending a wave of nausea through his body. He struggled against those arms that hugged him tight despite him being covered with grime, sweat and cum.
"I found him!" Cyno shouted and almost immediately, Tighnari, Madame Faruzan, Layla, Nilou, Dehya, Candace, Traveller, The Wanderer and Nahida came inside. Spooked, Alhaitham weakly scrambled out of Cyno's arms to the corner of the tent in a poor attempt to hide himself, curled his body from the shame that swallowed him whole. He waited in tensed silence, terrified.
"Alhaitham," Nahida looked at him, as if her heart had been shattered. "You may rest now," she said, trying to soothe him. "It's okay. You're safe. No one will hurt you anymore."
Alhaitham wailed when Cyno tried to touch him again, prompting him to passed out from the choking sense of panic attack.
Kaveh stared at the man laying on the bed blankly. He didn't know what to think. He wasn't there but Cyno said... He said it was so horrible that it couldn't be described. All he could say was that it shattered them all to see... such a sight. He was... He was away in Liyue with his new boyfriend. He wasn't there to save Alhaitham from such tragedy.
Tighnari sat with him, accompanying him and his self-blame throughout the days. It had been 16 days and Alhaitham had yet to woken up. He had returned as soon as possible when he received the news that the Acting Grand Sage had been kidnapped. He only arrived in Sumeru after a few hours the rescue team arrived with Alhaitham.
Cyno was right about being shattered at the sight of Alhaitham.
Burn marks and slashes littered his once unblemished skin.
He had grown skinnier from barely a week of being kidnapped.
And the signs... it was clear that he had been raped nonstop.
Kaveh couldn't look anymore.
It was the day Alhaitham would be woken up from his coma, anesthesia being cut off. They all waited for the moment to come, tensed and stressed out.
The Wanderer suddenly frowned and lightly touched Alhaitham's forehead before moving away with a dark look. "What is it?" Nahida asked, worried, not wanting to look into Alhaitham's mind without consent. "You will see," The Wanderer said simply.
As soon as he said that, Alhaitham's eyes snapped open.
Nilou, Madame Faruzan, Candace, Dehya, Nahida, Layla stared with wide eyes. The Traveller and The Wanderer shared a look with the latter nodding, making the Traveller looked heartbroken.
Cyno, Tighnari and Kaveh... The three of them were too shocked to even say anything or move. They were best friends. They considered themselves best friends. They had occasional dinner at either Tighnari or Alhaitham's house. They had meet ups at Lambad's Tavern once a month to play TCG with one another. They soothed each other's pain; helped each other's problems. Nothing could ever prepare them to lose Alhaitham in such a way.
Alhaitham's eyes.
They're dead, Kaveh thought in blatant terror.
It was a clear sign that whatever horror he faced during his kidnapping broke his spirit to dust, never to return to the way he was before.
The said male caught sight of them and he froze, tensed like a string about to be snapped. He clutched onto the bed sheets and scrambled to the wall, terrified and shaken out of his mind. Alhaitham moved his hands painfully slow and signed, "Who are you?"
The three men burst into tears, grieving for a man that was still alive and yet dead at the same time.
Kaveh entered Alhaitham's house to grab some clean clothes for the man when he found it by accident. Alhaitham's... diary of a sort, placed on his bed, next to Kaveh's feather that he thought he misplaced. The feather that Alhaitham himself had gifted to Kaveh.
Against his will, he sat on the bed and opened the book with curiosity. The first thing he saw in Alhaitham's beautiful cursive handwriting was,
'Kaveh is nice.'
Startled, he stopped, wondering what this was about as he flipped through the pages. Day by day, the entries had gotten longer and longer. He was shaking by the time he reached the last page of the diary, clearly it was the day before Alhaitham had been kidnapped. It read:
'I have regrets. Kaveh had gone to Liyue with Farouj and I could not stop the pain in my heart every time I hear... Is this it then? A story of the one that got away? I have regretted that I did not tell him I have loved him for so long. Can you believe it? I had fallen in love with him since the Akademiya days. Beautiful beautiful Kaveh, my Paradisaea. I am sorry for everything I have said and done throughout the times we have known each other. I suppose it is too late now. Everyday I kept wishing that this was just a nightmare and that when I wake up, he would be there as usual, yapping at me for not cleaning up. I know it is wishful thinking. I broke my own heart. All these years, I kept people from entering my heart, not wanting to be left behind and hurt again. But in the end, the one that broke my heart is myself. How laughable. I suppose the saying is right after all. You never realise you had the world until you lost it. Kaveh, I love you. I love you and I am sorry. Please come home. Your keys... I kept them. I have them with me. I never left without it. Just in case you came to me wanting to stay in my house once again. You left me behind again for the second time but it's alright. I forgive you. I will wait for you to come home, Kaveh. Do not be late. - Your Hayi'
"I'm home," Kaveh cried, clutching the book desperately to his chest. "I'm home, Hayi. I'm back, see? I'm here. I'm home, Hayi but you're not here. You're not here anymore. I love you too..."