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Saturday seemed like the perfect day for a skating competition.
Mikey had thought of the idea first, pumped after a successful week of fighting crime. Draxum and his other goons had been perfectly punked by the work of Mikey and his brothers. His adrenaline was kicking far more than usual, which was saying a lot, since Mikey had a lot of adrenaline. Mikey, Raph, and Leo stood with their skateboards tucked beneath their arms, standing next to their ramp in the middle of the sewer. They had decided that they would try and attempt the craziest, most epic gravity defying stunts. Whoever could do the most would win, and whoever lost would grab pizza for the night. Mikey didn’t mind pizza runs, but rained slapped against the sidewalk outside of the sewer, and Mikey had no intentions of getting soaked.
“Alright, brochachos, let’s get this started, shall we?” Leo said, stretching himself out like a cat. His version of warming up. “I wish you all luck against me.”
Mikey rolled his eyes as Leo struck a model pose, like he was posing for the cover of Sports Illustrated. Raph snorted, playfully shoving Leo and knocking him to the floor. “Yeah right, Leo. You’re going down.”
Leo glared up at their older brother from the floor, a look of vengeance in his eyes. “I will get you back for that.”
Mikey jumped from foot to foot like the professional runners he had seen on TV. It made him appear more professional, if he did say so himself. “Ah, come on, we all know who here is the best,” Mikey claimed, not so subtly pointing at himself. Mikey was confident in his skating abilities that he would win and earn himself bragging rights and pizza. Not that he would do much with the bragging rights. That was a Leo and Donnie thing. Pizza was his main motivation. Pizza was always the main motive.
Speaking of…Mikey scanned the room. Leo and Raph were squabbling, but they lacked an important figure. Donnie was nowhere in sight. “Guys,” Mikey asked, “where’s Donnie?”
The brothers fell silent. Leo swiveled his head left to right. “Uhhhh, he must be in his lair.” Leo glanced at Raph. “Didn’t he say he had tech to work on, Raph?”
“Oh, uh, yeah,” Raph said, smiling at Mikey. “He’s busy right now, Mike.”
“Well, he’s not too busy for us!”
Ralph frowned, rubbing the back of his head. “I don’t know, Mikey. He’s been really deep into that thingamajig he’s making.”
“But you always force Donnie to play with- ohhhh.”
Mikey laughed at his brothers’ obvious fear. They were scared of Donatello being a part of the competition. Mikey had to admit, Donatello scared him sometimes too when he was aiming to win. Like the time he had stayed up all night to beat Leo’s score on Dance Dance Revolution. Donnie had somehow managed to get two times Leo’s score fueled on coffee and his competitive nature alone. That was a feat. “Aw, come on guys. I know Donnie has a tendency to want to win and always be right and he’s always clashing with you two, but you don’t have to worry.”
“I’m not scared of Donnie,” Leo scoffed, staring at the floor. “But he’d never take a break to join us, Michael.”
Raph nodded. “Yeah, there’s no way you’ll get him out of his room.”
“Oh yes he will, and he will because he wants to win! Plus, I’m the cutest.” Mikey turned away from his brothers, headed towards Donnie’s lair. His brothers were a couple of wimps.
Mikey would show them.
Mikey knocked on the door of Donatello’s lab, politely drumming a little rhythm. Donatello’s lab used to creep Mikey out as a child, the distant hum of machinery behind the steel metal door. It remained the same after all those years, and Mikey could remember how Donatello used to tease Mikey that little robot droids would attack him if he tried to enter when Donnie was working. Mikey was sure that Donnie was lying, but just in case, he never attempted to go inside without permission. “Donnie! We’re playing skate games! You should come out and play.”
From inside the lab, Donnie released a dramatic sigh. “Mikey, I am a little busy right now. And by a little, I lied. I’m a lot busy.”
“But…skate games! Don’t you want to play with your favorite brother?” Mikey giggled. “That’s me by the way, if you didn’t guess,” Mikey whispered to the door.
“Listen, Mikey, while you pose a compelling argument with your pulling of the favorite card, I am far too busy with my technology. Why don’t you play for me?“
Mikey pressed his cheek against the door, sliding down miserably. “But it’s not the saaaaaame,” he complained. Donnie was not only the brains of their operations, but the most stubborn.
“It is virtually the same. Play in my honor. You want us to win, don’t you?”
“Of course I do!” Mikey frowned. Wait a second. Donnie was using his compelling tone of voice, his secret weapon against Mikey. “Wait, you’re trying to trick me….”
“Now why would I ever do that? I am simply trying to compel you to skate on the behalf of the both of us so I can work on my tech in peace, and win the challenge against my siblings at the same time. Wow, I am a genius!” Donnie cleared his throat. “Um, anyways, why don’t you run along, Angelo?”
Mikey sighed, defeated. “Alright, I will win for the both of us!” He pointed an accusing finger at the door. “But I will get you to come out eventually, Don Don!”
“You can try, my dear orange brother, but I’m afraid you shall find that you cannot best me that easily.”
“I have no idea what any of that means, but thank you!”
Mikey strutted back to his other brothers with a smug look on his face. He was determined to get his brother out of his lab one way or another.
“And that is how you do it!” Mikey boasted, lifting his muscles into the air, flexing for Leo and Raph who lay in a breathless pile on the floor. Mikey had won their skate competition, and was feeling ever so pumped up.
Leo rolled his eyes playfully. “You only won because you messed up that one time and used puppy eyes on me and Raph to let you try again.” Leo sighed dramatically, throwing his head back. “Your puppy eyes are far too convincing.”
Mikey snickered. “I had to win for me and Donnie! Speaking of…I’m going to go tell him I won. Excuse me, we won.”
“You go do that,” Raph said, picking himself off the floor. “I’m gonna go grab us some pizza. You earned it, Mikey.”
Mikey gave his brothers a thumbs up, heading to Donnie’s lab. Donnie could resist many things, and though his refusal to show up his brothers had surprised Mikey, Mikey knew the one thing Donnie could not refuse. Pizza. The most glorious invention of all time.
“Donnie,” Mikey sing-songed, tapping on the door. “Donnie, guess who has six fingers and won the skate comp!”
“From your overtly loud voice and the fact that there’s only three options, I’m going to assume you,” Donnie said, his voice muffled by the sound of what Mikey assumed as a blow torch. “Am I correct?”
“Yes!”
“Figured.”
“And Raph is getting pizza to celebrate! Don’t you want to get some pizza?”
“Tempting, but I’m very busy. This invention is a pain in my shell. And I mean that quite literally, I have been poked and hit several times.” Mikey heard the beeps and boops from some kind of tech inside. “Pizza later, tech now.”
Mikey frowned. Donnie would skip out on a lot of things, but never pizza. Donnie loved pizza. Donnie loved being around Mikey. Why was he being so stubborn? Mikey tried to wave away the darker thoughts that clouded his mind, the ones that told him Donnie was tired of them or upset. Instead, Mikey just assumed Donnie was ultra-focused on his tech. Maybe it was a surprise? Yeah, definitely. “Alright, fine, but you better come out later! I have a surprise for you.” Mikey flushed at his lie. Okay, well it wasn’t totally a lie. Mikey would just fix something up for Donnie that would have to spark Donnie’s curiosity. “Okay?”
“Alright, little Angelo. Try your best but I’m not going out.”
“We’ll see!”
Mikey looked down at his creation with the eyes of a mother to her newborn baby. After an hour of cutting paper, pizza breaks, and a few bandaids in between, Mikey had created his surprise for Donnie. It was a little origami turtle, complete with a purple bandana drawn with Mikey’s favorite crayons. No doubt Donatello would have to leave his lab for such a masterpiece. Before he could show it to Donnie, however, he decided he wanted to get the opinions of his brothers.
“Raph! Leo!” Mikey called, waving Raph and Leo to the table where Mikey currently sat. “What do you guys think about my creation?” Mikey proudly held up his origami turtle in gently cupped hands, holding it high in the air. Raph and Leo glanced at each other, their expressions unreadable. Oh no. Did they think it was bad? Now that Mikey looked at it again, he could see some parts of the turtle looked oddly disproportionate. Was that so bad? It added charm, right?
“Mikey, that looks great,” Raph finally said, offering Mikey a thumbs up. “What’s it for though?”
“To try and lure our brother outside of his cage,” Mikey answered, flashing a smug smile. And they thought Donnie was the full brains of the operation. Watch out, Don Don, Mikey thought, because I might just outsmart you. “Donnie can’t possibly stay inside after he realized I have crafted him a creation.”
Leo poked at the turtle. “I mean it’s cute but is it really awe-inspiring material?”
“It was made with love!”
“I’m messing with you, Michael. It looks great. But to get Donatello out of his lair? Not gonna work.”
Mikey stuck his tongue out at his brothers, turning away from them and heading to Donnie’s lair. “I’ll show you! Donnie’s gonna love it!”
The noises coming from Donnie’s lab were a clear indication that Donnie was in full tech mode, but Mikey had no doubts that his precious creation would lure Donnie out. Mikey knocked on the door, not too loud but not too quiet either. “Oh Donnieeeee, your favorite brother is back! And I’ve brought you back my surprise!”
A sound like a drill sounded from inside the lab. “Oh gee, Michael, what did you make?”
“You’ll have to open up to see. But just know it’s very cool and exciting and made with love.”
“Michael, I already told you, I am deathly busy. This tech is being more stubborn than usual and requires my ultimate focus and attention.” More sparks and drilling. “Now, if you leave your object at the door I can take a look at it later.”
Mikey kicked at the door. “Donatello Hamato! I made this creation with love… and blood from paper cuts but that’s besides the point. You better open this door!”
“Little Angelo, are you lecturing me?”
Mikey crossed his arms, turning away from the door even though Donnie couldn’t see him. Now Donatello was getting on his nerves. “Maybe I am. What if I told you this is the greatest thing I’ve ever seen in my life?”
“Sounds like a stretch to me.”
“Okay, what if I told you it is one of the best things I’ve ever seen in my life? Like…top three!”
“What about that group of puppies we found that one time we went to get pizza? The ones with the big eyes and fuzzy brown fur?”
“Ohhh, they were sooooo cute,” Mikey squealed. No! Mikey mentally slapped himself across the face. “Hey! You’re distracting me! Ugh, you’re good at this.”
“I’m good at most things, Angelo. Now, go on. I will pick up your creation later.”
Mikey groaned, staring at the small turtle figure in his hand. He placed it on the floor in front of the lab’s door, his face gone slack. Okay, so things didn’t go all according to plan. That was okay! It was totally fine! Mikey would try again later!
It would all go as planned.
That night Mikey dreamt of a white room, with Donnie on one side and Mikey on the other side. At one point, Donnie disappeared, fading into the white atmosphere, as Mikey screamed out his name, stumbling blindly. “Donnie! Donnie!”
Mikey woke up gasping for air. He hated nightmares.
“Morning, Pops,” Mikey chirped, emerging into the kitchen where his father rummaged through the fridge. Splinter wasn’t much of a cook, so they usually took to breakfasts of cereal or microwave burritos. The television droned in the background as Leonardo and Raph sat on the couch watching Jupiter Jim 3, munching on cereal. Mikey turned back to his father, reaching for a banana on the counter. “Sleep well?”
Splinter muttered something to himself as he fished out a carton of milk. One that was most definitely expired. “Oh, uh, yes yes. Pass me the cereal, will you?”
Mikey grabbed the cereal from off the counter, handing it to his father. The room felt off, Mikey noticed. There was still a lack of purple amongst them. “Hey, Pops, where’s Donnie? Is he still working on his tech?”
Splinter shrugged, pouring his cereal into a bowl. “You know Purple. He’s very focused on things. I’m sure he’ll be out soon.”
“Oh, give it up, Mikey,” Leo called out from the couch. “Donnie’s not coming out.”
“I talked to him multiple times yesterday! It’s been a full day! He has to come out!”
Raph shook his head, getting up from his spot on the couch and walking towards Mikey. “Mikey, you know he’s not coming out.”
“You don’t know that!” Mikey thought of his dream. Of Donnie gone and Mikey trying to find him. What did Mikey do to deserve this? Why was Donatello trying to hide from him? The thought made Mikey tremble with rage. He balled his fists, turning away from his family and storming towards Donnie’s lair. Mikey had enough with Donnie. If it was a game, it wasn’t funny anymore.
“Mikey! Where are you going?” Raph called out. Mikey ignored him, too preoccupied with how he was going to get Donatello to stop whatever he was doing and come outside.
The origami turtle still sat at the doorway, untouched.
Mikey stared at the door looming before him, the sound of machines roaring in his ears. It grew louder and louder, and the door felt like it was getting bigger. Mikey could sense Donatello inside of the lair. Why would he not respond? Why wasn’t he listening?
“Donnie needs to come out!” Mikey said to himself, more angry than upset. Donnie wasn’t listening to him. His face grew red. Mikey knocked on the door. “Donnie, please come out. You’ve been cooped up in there forever!”
There was no answer. Mikey knocked again. “Donnie! Donnie! Please stop ignoring me.” Mikey’s voice cracked as he began to bang on the door with both fists, his eyes watering. Open open open. “Donnie! Donnie!”
“Mikey!” Ralph’s arms wrapped around Mikey’s waist, pulling him back. Mikey didn’t want to stop. He needed to keep banging on the door. Donnie couldn’t stay cooped up forever. Mikey needed Donnie.
“Stop it, Raph!” Mikey screamed, trying to free himself of his older brother's grip. He needed Donnie. He needed his brother. “I need to get Donnie! He’s in trouble!”
“Mikey!” Raph yelled. “Mikey, Donnie is gone!”
Donnie is gone.
Gone.
“No. No he’s not….”
“Mikey, please, stop pretending he’s still here. He’s gone. We lost him.” Raph turned to look at Leo, who stood behind him, tears streaming down his face. Raph began to cry too, and Mikey felt his chest hurting. “The battle…he saved us all. Mikey, you can’t pretend he’s still here.”
Mikey let out a sob, dropping to his knees. He didn’t want to think about the battle. About the way Donnie had jumped into action as Mikey and their brothers were knocked to the ground, barely able to fight back. Donnie had jumped at Baron Draxum, his staff raised high, and…. Mikey couldn’t finish the thought. He had seen it over and over again in his nightmares, never the same way, but always the same outcome. Sometimes it was pitch black and Mikey could hear Donnie’s cries. Sometimes it was just the two of them in the lair, with Mikey unmoving, unable to help.
“Mikey, it’s too hard to pretend he’s still here,” Leo whispered. “We can’t do it anymore. You have to let go.”
“But we need him…. I miss him.”
Leo and Raph both sat next to Mikey, wrapping their arms around him, burying him in a hug.
“I miss him too,” Leo whispered through tears. Leo, who had been the first to jump to Donnie’s aid, portaling them away and to a safe space. Leo, who had refused to let go of Donnie’s body, who hadn’t wanted to see his brother go.
Raph squeezed Mikey’s hand. Raph, who had gone mad with anger and hurt so many of Baron Draxum’s soldiers. Raph, who had blamed himself for weeks about what had happened. Raph, who almost quit fighting, but knew Donnie would have wanted him to continue.
And then there was Mikey, who could not look at his brother on the ground. Mikey, who had refused to acknowledge the death of his brother.
But Donnie was gone.
Donnie was gone.