Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“The moonlight that faintly flows on a breezy night. 

carefully putting this desperate longing for you into the wind and moonlight nicely. 

when will I be able to meet you

you who I miss, and miss again.” 

— Min Yoongi, 2022  

Min Yoongi sits on the rooftop of his house and gazes at the cloudy sky above him. He enjoys this, relaxing with a can of Hite in hand right beneath the stars and the full moon that shines brightly at the centre. It’s quiet, peaceful—

“Hyung!” 

Yoongi sighs. “What are you doing here, Jeongguk?”

“Thought I’d find you here,” Jeongguk brushes the dust off his pants and sits beside Yoongi, opening one of the three beer cans he brought up with him.

“How did you know I’m here?” Yoongi asks.

“The moon,” the younger one points at the sky vaguely,  “You always watch it like it’s part of your routine, especially when it’s a full moon. You believe in the werewolf stuff that comes around howling?”

The older one snorts, swirling his half-empty can and glancing up at the moonlight, “You’re the one who believes in those, or Sailor Moon or some shit.”

“Then what is it? Is it one of those ‘I feel like the main character of a movie when I sit here’ kind of thing?” Jeongguk jokes and sips into the beer, glancing at Yoongi and then at the Moon to see if he can see whatever the latter does. 

“Will you believe me if I say I know him?” Yoongi asks after a minute of contemplation, pointing at the Moon, gaze not going away from the bright light.

“Who?” Jeongguk frowns in confusion.

“The Moon.”

*******

“Oh, Yoongi, sweetie are you not going home yet? Kids will have to go home soon,” one of the older ladies who comes to the park with her grandchildren kneels in front of a five-year-old Yoongi who’s digging up the soil with his tiny plastic shovel.

“Mom is coming late but she told me not to go anywhere,” Yoongi mumbles and wipes the sweat off his face with his forearm, dust now rubbing onto his cheek. 

“You be careful then, wait here on the bench or go to a policeman if you see one, okay? Ask them to stay with you until mom comes,” the lady says and stands up, patting Yoongi on the head and waving him goodbye as she walks out of the park.

It’s five in the afternoon now, the town’s clock would ring any time to indicate that all children playing out have to head home, but Yoongi is still sitting on the ground alone. He looks up at the clock and watches the seconds go by until it does start ringing, so he stands up and skips to sit on the nearby wooden bench. It’s not that he can’t head home alone, his house is just a few meters away. But he was told to wait and Yoongi is an obedient boy—or so he thought.

“Why are you not going home yet?” A voice calls for Yoongi at the other end of the bench. Yoongi looks up and sees a boy staring at him, eyes round and lips plump, wet and sticky from the lollipop he’s licking.

“`m waiting for mom, she’s coming from work,” Yoongi mumbles and looks far off the park, watching the sun slowly set.

“Do you want me to wait with you?” The boy asks and sits down, not waiting for Yoongi to answer at least.

“The bell already rang,” Yoongi says and looks at the boy, “You’ll get scolded.”

“It’s okay, at least I made a friend.”

Yoongi’s mother has said a lot of times not to talk to strangers, but maybe he’s not obedient all the time.

“Seokjin,” the boy said the next week at the park while piling a mountain of sand beside the very lopsided sandcastle that Yoongi is trying to fix, “that’s my name.”

Seokjin. That’s easy to remember. Not like Yoongi was bad with names in the first place but he can remember this friend’s name. Yoongi nods, flattening one side of the sandcastle, “I’m Yoongi. Where do you live?”

“Over there,” Seokjin stands to point vaguely to one street, “You?”

Yoongi is fairly new to the town, moving to Seoul with his family from Daegu after his parents had to make the move for work. Seokjin smiles at him widely and wipes the sweat off his temple with his arm.

“Do you want to come over to my house? I have the new Beyblade.”

*****

“Have you started that Math homework yet?” a teenage Seokjin asks Yoongi as they walk home from school. Seokjin picks up a small stone from the pavement and throws it on the nearby light pole. Yoongi gives him a look. 

Yoongi nods. “Yeah, but I’m not done yet. You?” Seokjin shakes his head and puts an arm around Yoongi’s shoulders. “Haven’t started it yet.”

“Hyung, that’s due tomorrow —”

“Yeah, I know. I had to catch up on other homework.” It isn’t a lie. ‘Hell week’ practically began when the school year started, and they’ve been loaded with work ever since.

“Right. Honestly, fuck this education system.” Yoongi kicks a stone he finds from his side. “At this rate, we’ll end up like robots.”

Seokjin stops in his tracks and suddenly starts moving his arms the way a robot would. “Wa-nna. finish. it. together. at home?” he says, mimicking a robotic voice to match his little dance. He freezes like that, letting only his eyes move to look up and wait for a reaction from the younger. 

Yoongi stares at him momentarily. He’s gotten used to this quirky bit of Seokjin. The latter is technically three months older than him but a whole year in Korean age. It almost doesn’t make any sense how they’re so different—maybe both at two ends of a spectrum, yet they’re always glued to the hip. The thing is that most times, though Yoongi just shrugs it off out of familiarity, he tends to play along. Because well—it’s not fun when only one is playing around, right?

“Oh-kay. Fine,” he says, doing the best robotic impression he can.

Seokjin laughs, satisfied with his best friend’s response. They continue walking silently to their neighbourhood. Yoongi tries to ignore how he likes it when Seokjin laughs his kind of laugh—the windshield one—the one Yoongi could recognize from a mile away.

“Hey Yoongi?” Seokjin breaks the comfortable silence between them.

“Seokjin-hyung.”

“What human body part does a robot have?” He asks as casually as he can, trying hard not to laugh just yet.

Yoongi sighs. He knows what’s coming next. “What?” 

“A ro- butt .” A hysterical laugh erupts. The boy claps for himself and almost trips forward when he slaps his knee.

“Oh God, hyung, please stop,” Yoongi deadpans. What his best friend doesn’t catch is the tiny smile he’s trying to hide.

Seokjin’s jokes are annoying or corny as hell, but Yoongi never gets tired of them—he probably even tells the joke to his other friends. Seokjin doesn’t have to know that of course.

“What are you looking at?” Seokjin asks Yoongi, who is staring out the window while they take a break from doing homework together.

“Nothing. Just the moon.” The younger one points towards the night sky as his friend comes closer to see. “Sometimes looks like it’s smiling. It’s pretty,” he gazes at the crescent-shaped glow up above.

Seokjin is silent for a second before his lips grow into a mischievous smile. He lets out a teasing howl and lightly pushes Yoongi’s shoulder. “Are you trying to confess to me, Yoongichi?”

Yoongi turns his head and frowns in confusion, “What?”

Seokjin laughs more, “Didn’t Taehyung say there’s that Japanese proverb, is it? Something like if you tell someone that the moon is pretty, that means ‘I love you’?”

Yoongi’s face crumples and he tries his best to suppress his growing smile, attempting to kick Seokjin in the shin. Seokjin moves quickly and giggles.

“Just say you love me and go,” Seokjin singsongs.

Yoongi rolls his eyes, “Whatever you say, hyung.”

Seokjin walks away and slumps on the bed, a groan of exhaustion coming from him as if he’s been holding it the whole day.

“Anyways, ‘m pretty surprised the moon showed up today.” 

“What do you mean?” Yoongi is even more surprised and confused now, walking to sit beside Seokjin on the edge of the bed, “The moon is always there because it keeps the earth in orbit. If it disappears, everything will be messed u—”

“Thought it only appears on moonday .” He says with a very confident English accent and lets out a wheezing laugh that’s muffled on the mattress. “Get it? Sunday, Moonday , Tuesday—”

“Ha-ha,” Yoongi replies with a poker face. “Monday actually came from the word monandaeg which means ‘the moon’s day’. So ha ha . You’re not entirely wrong though.”

Seokjin clicks his tongue, “ Of course Min Yoongi would know that, king of eating general trivia for breakfast.”

Yoongi smiles at that.

*****

The endless ringing of his phone wakes Yoongi up. He forces himself to pull down his covers and peek at his window. It’s not even morning yet. In fact, it’s the dead of the night.

He answers the call anyway, voice groggy. “Hello?”

“Yoongi!” the voice exclaims, too loud and excited. Yoongi grunts. “What– are you already sleeping?” the voice in the other line gasps.

Yoongi turns to his bedside table and squints to see the time on the clock. “It’s fucking 12:01 in the morning, Seokjin-hyung.”

The older one snorts. “So? I thought we were in high school. What are you, a grandpa or a little boy that has to be in bed by nine?”

Yoongi groans, rubbing his face. “It’s a school night, I–why are you calling anyway?”

“Oh, nothing.” Seokjin singsongs. “I just wanted to be the first to wish my best friend in the whole wide world a happy birthday. Happy birthday, Yoongi! I’m the first, right?”

“Uh, what?” Yoongi is still in a daze, a bit confused about what day it is. “Sorry, yeah.”

“I told you I’ve been learning how to cook, right? Don’t bother bringing food. Lunch is on me, okay? Bye!” Seokjin hangs up the second after, leaving Yoongi to stare at his phone and try to process all of that. He can’t help but smile before falling back to sleep.

That same year, Yoongi makes sure to call at exactly 12 midnight on December 4th. He even set up a reminder and an alarm on his phone so he won’t forget. 

“Hello?” Seokjin answers casually. Of course, he’d be awake at this time.

“Seokjin-hyung,” Yoongi starts, but for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to just say the words. Why does he have to call in the first place, when he could just text it? He hates talking on the phone anyway. 

“Yeah, Yoongi. What’s up?” the older one asks, and when Yoongi doesn’t answer immediately, he starts to worry. “Is everything okay? What’s wrong?”

“Uh, no no. Nothing wrong. Just…” He clears his throat. “H-Happy birthday, hyung! See you later.”

“Aww thank y—”

Yoongi ends the call right away, not letting the older one finish. That doesn’t stop Seokjin from texting anyway.

Seokjin-hyung [00:03]:

thank you, yoongichi~

thank you-nggi!

get it?

pls laugh it’s my birthday

You [00:06]:

haha

Seokjin-hyung [00:06]:

<3

Yoongi reads the conversation with that big gummy smile on his face. It’s almost ridiculous how much he enjoys Seokjin’s lame jokes, even if he time and time pretends that he doesn’t.

It has become a birthday tradition for both of them since then—starting their special day with a call from their best friend.

It’s not until the 18th birthday party of Seokjin, before Yoongi and Seokjin graduate, that things turn out differently. Of course, the birthday call tradition happened, and Seokjin also invited Yoongi over again like he did all these years from that first year they met at the park. Everything is the same, nothing too different for 18-year-old Seokjin until after dinner when Yoongi finds Seokjin standing side-by-side with his mother by the kitchen sink while Seokjin’s mom washes the dishes. Yoongi stops in his tracks, taking a couple of steps back on the wooden stairs to hide. He thinks about turning back and going back to Seokjin’s room to wait for him until—

“When are you going to tell him?” Seokjin’s mother asks with a hushed voice.

Yoongi sees Seokjin shrug, and shake his head from the space between the pillars in the staircase, “I don’t know, does it matter?” Seokjin says with a frown on his face.

“Kim Seokjin, you know he’ll have to find out sooner or later. Don’t delay this anymore, you’re going to university soon—and then what? You’ll just hurt him and disappear from him like that? Do you know how many years it took for me and your father to accept this?”

Seokjin’s mom sounds frustrated right away, and Yoongi can barely pick up what she means. Who is ‘he’? Is it him? Why will he get hurt and what of Seokjin have his parents accepted? Or maybe Yoongi himself? Is Yoongi even allowed to listen to all of this? Perhaps not, but his legs can’t seem to move and his feet are stuck to the wooden staircase. 

“Mom, how long do you think it took for me to realise all of this ?” Seokjin sounds upset now and his mom turns off the running water from the faucet. “How long do you think it took for me to process that, and that you’re trying your best for me to live a normal life? And then now,” Seokjin’s voice cracks, “You’re the one asking me to talk about it again?” 

Yoongi frowns at the sight of Seokjin suddenly breaking down in this conversation, looking away instantly. Why doesn’t Yoongi have any idea what this is about? Has Seokjin been suffering in his life without ever mentioning it to Yoongi? He has so many questions and he doesn’t know how to go about it now that he’s already here standing on the staircase and relying on whatever he can eavesdrop on. He doesn’t want to, honestly, because that’s wrong but—what is Seokjin hiding from him exactly that it hurts him to even talk about it?

Seokjin’s mother looks apologetic now and pitiful, or whatever in between that. She rubs Seokjin’s back and pulls him into a hug, muttering apologies that Seokjin doesn’t particularly respond to other than sniffles. 

“You have to tell him though, son. You can’t let him think forever that you’re the same. What are you going to do when the day comes?” 

Seokjin stares at the ground behind his mother as he keeps the embrace, leaning on her shoulder.

“...Do you think he’ll understand?”

It’s silent and for a second, Yoongi is terrified that Seokjin and his mother will notice that he’s been standing there on the stairs, so he stays still. He peeks and sees Seokjin’s mother patting his head and smiling softly. Yoongi stares, and he waits in anticipation until he hears his name.

“Yoongi is a smart boy, he’ll understand if you explain it properly.”

So it is about him—whatever this conversation has been from the beginning. Well, that’s making the poor guy more anxious now knowing Seokjin must be crying because of something related to Yoongi. 

“Mom, it’s not every day you hear someone come from a literal celestial body—the Moon. He’d think I’m playing,” Seokjin pouts, “Even a guy like Yoongi wouldn’t be able to fully comprehend that.”

Seokjin comes from a what?

“Don’t joke about it like that, he really won’t believe you if you do,” Seokjin’s mom chuckles and her hand doesn’t stop caressing Seokjin’s soft black hair.

“Then what do I say? I don’t know how to say it other than bluntly. I’ll disappear eventually because I’m not entirely human and go back to the Moon? Sounds like the plot of Sailor Moon, mom. I really don’t know how to do this,” Seokjin whines and sighs heavily. 

Disappear? Who’s disappearing? What the fuck does this even all mean? 

“Yoongi?” Seokjin’s eyes widen as he spots Yoongi slowly descending from the stairs. Seokjin’s mother quickly turns her head as the subject of their conversation shows up timely. Seokjin takes a step towards his friend. “Yoongi, how long have you been standing there?” 

“Not long,” Yoongi lies, looking away from Seokjin. He has so many questions, on top of feeling confused and angry and frustrated. It’s all too overwhelming to deal with at the moment. “Sorry, I-I’ll just go. Bye, Mrs. Kim. Thank you for the meal,” Yoongi turns away quickly and leaves the house, not sparing his friend another glance. He reaches the park when he hears his name being called.

“Yoongi! Yoongi, wait!”

Yoongi ignores it and keeps walking, but then a hand tightly grabs his wrist, causing him to turn around and face the very person he’s running away from.

Seokjin puts something on Yoongi’s hands as he tries to catch his breath. The latter stares at it. It’s his coat, which he had left hanging on the couch in the living room at the Kims. Realizing that Yoongi isn’t making any move to wear it, Seokjin clicks his tongue and grabs the warm piece of clothing to put over Yoongi’s shoulders.  

“How can you leave your coat? It’s freezing out here.” Yoongi doesn’t say a word and he doesn’t look him in the eye either. Right now, he just can’t.

Seokjin sighs defeatedly, blinking away his barely dried-up tears. “You heard all of it, didn’t you?” 

“I did.” Yoongi tries to keep it together, trying with all his might not to explode. “I don’t understand what the fuck is going on.”

There’s a shake in Yoongi’s voice, one that Seokjin can easily pick up. It really can’t be helped, Seokjin at least understands that.

“Yoongi, please let me explain,” Seokjin begs. 

And Yoongi decides he’ll give it a chance. Maybe he just heard it wrong. Maybe it will make more sense this time. So they sit on the nearby wooden bench and Seokjin tells him everything, from the very beginning.

Seokjin is not entirely a person. He looks like one—just like everyone else—but he’s half-human, half-spirit. Seokjin starts to talk about his family’s origin, that they’re descendants of the Moon spirit, one of the nature spirits that keep this world alive and running. Decades and centuries have passed with only selected descendants of the Moon being born half-spirit. Seokjin is one of them, with both his parents skipped from that line of half-spirit entities. Seokjin’s parents have prayed to the Moon all nine months that his mother was carrying him, to have this baby skipped as well. However, fate has chosen Seokjin and even chose him to be a bit more special—more powerful compared to other half-spirits. He’s powerful enough to give the Moon power in due time, so that the world as we know it wouldn’t cease to exist. It is his obligation, his purpose. When the time comes, he’ll have to leave and become the Moon himself.

Yoongi forces a laugh. “That doesn’t make any fucking sense, hyung.”

His hyung looks down, not knowing what else to say, “I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you about all this earlier.”

Yoongi gets up, rubbing his forehead. He paces around until he stops suddenly. “This is one of your jokes, isn’t it? Your stupid pranks? And you somehow got your mom in it too?“

Seokjin shakes his head, tears welling again in his eyes. “I-I wish it was just a joke, but it’s the truth. I won’t be here forever—”

“I won’t be here forever either!” Yoongi doesn’t even realise that he’s crying until his voice cracks and he feels his cheeks overheating. “I’ll die eventually. We all will, hyung! Even kids are aware of that shit.”

Seokjin stands, trying to reach for his best friend. “Yes, I know, Yoongich—“

“Don’t fucking call me that right now,” the younger spits, pushing away Seokjin’s hand.

The older heaves a sigh. His voice shakes as he tries to speak again. “Y-Yoongi. I know what you mean, but—”

“You know what, if you’re leaving town, you can just say exactly that. You don’t have to tell me some kind of fairytale bullshit to sugarcoat it. I’m not a child,” Yoongi sniffs and roughly wipes the tears off of his face.

“I understand that this is all confusing and weird as fuck. But,” Seokjin takes a breath, “It is what it is. I’m not—I’m not like you. I’ll have to go because it’s my obligation—“

“Then I’ll go with you!” he yells, tears once again streaming down his cheeks. Yoongi never yells, but now his voice echoes through the empty park on a winter evening. “I’ll go with you, Seokjin-hyung.”

Seokjin couldn’t help but sob, seeing the pain in Yoongi’s eyes. He looks down as he shakes his head. “I’m so sorry, Yoongi. Y-You can’t. That’s not how it works—”

“I don’t fucking care!” Yoongi steps back. “You can’t just leave me like that. You can’t.” He flails his arms and steps back, even more, to not let Seokjin get any closer to him. Yoongi then turns and runs home crying, mad and confused. He doesn’t turn back to Seokjin who’s desperately calling his name.

Seokjin and Yoongi don’t talk for weeks. Seokjin calls and sends messages almost every day, which Yoongi ignores and doesn’t even bother opening.

(15) missed calls from Seokjin-hyung  

Seokjin-hyung [23:10]:

i’m sorry.

yoongi, please

Seokjin-hyung [03:09]:

take your time. talk to me when you can, ok?

Seokjin-hyung [06:04]:

morning yoongichi

i’m sorry. pls forgive me

(28) missed calls from Seokjin-hyung

Yoongi sees him on the way to school. Seokjin also spots him from across the hilly street and raises his hand to wave hello, but Yoongi doesn’t acknowledge it. Instead, he walks faster than he ever imagined he could just so that he wouldn’t have to talk to his friend, his very best friend. It’s almost ridiculous how Yoongi can barely ignore Seokjin, not when they’re in the same neighbourhood and school. From time to time, they even bump into each other after classes too, but Yoongi doesn’t say a word.

Seokjin-hyung [16:22]:

hey i thought of a joke

Seokjin-hyung [16:24]:

nvm it’s not that funny anyway

(32) missed calls from Seokjin-hyung

Seokjin-hyung [00:30]:

you’ll probably ignore this but whatever

merry christmas yoongichi

i miss you :(

You [02:07]:

merry christmas hyung

Seokjin-hyung [02:08]:

yoONGI!

:(

The thing is, Yoongi misses his best friend too. But he needed all the time in the world to process everything. Through all the years they’ve spent together, Seokjin has never lied to him, and he never would. At the same time, how on earth is all of this possible? Seokjin being a half-spirit that needs to return to—no, that needs to become the Moon? It’s like those bedtime stories that parents and grandparents tell children all the time. Mythology and all that. It can’t be real, can it?

So Yoongi does every form of research that he can do. He drops by the school and public library to borrow books that might contain some logical explanation to all of this, perhaps astronomy and science. He reads up on the sun, the planets, the stars, and the moon. After not finding out much, he decides to look into the spirit world, particularly half-spirits. He looks for studies and papers about it. On Shamanism, Korean mythology, and nature spirits, everything in that category. It’s not like Yoongi believes in all of those in the first place but he reads them anyway. On half-spirits, well, it seems that not enough scholars look into those. Do they even know that half-spirits exist?

Later on, Yoongi finds himself binge-watching cartoons. First, it’s ‘Avatar: The Last Airbender’ and then ‘Spirited Away’, to which he ends up crying. But nobody really needs to know that.

In the end, he still feels overwhelmed. What should he do with all this information now? Fine, the spirit world is real. Half-spirits live on earth like normal people. But how the fuck does a half-spirit become a satellite that orbits a planet? 

Yoongi mostly only believes in science, but perhaps not everything can be explained or needs to be explained.

Seokjin-hyung [00:00]:

happy new year yoongichi~

come over later if u want. i’m making tteokguk

you should taste it

Yoongi knocks on the door on New Year’s Day, carrying a cling-wrapped plate of kimchi jeon and a small basket of fruits.

The door opens, and on the other side stands Seokjin with a surprised and delighted look in his eyes, “Yoongi? Hey.”

“Hey,” Yoongi shifts. “Happy New Year, hyung. My, uh, my mom told me to give you these.” He reaches out to hand over the food to Seokjin, but he only takes the plate since he has to keep the door open.

The older one gives a tiny smile. “Wow, thank you. Come in. I-If you want to of course.”

Yoongi nods and enters the Kim household again after a long time. Memories of the last time Yoongi was there on Seokjin’s birthday and everything that unfolded when Yoongi stood still on the staircase come rushing back. He tries to shake it off, noting in his head that it shouldn’t matter anymore, now that he knows what it was all about.

“Is it good?” Seokjin asks, nervousness and anticipation written on his face. 

Yoongi doesn’t give any reaction until his eyes widen. He nods and sips another spoonful, “Mm. It’s really good.”

“Eat up, Yoongi. Seokjin cooked that on his own,” Mrs. Kim offers with a smile.

“You helped me, mom.” Seokjin quickly argues but is trying to suppress his smile.

“Oh don’t say that. I only taught you, but you did it on your own.” Seokjin’s mom smiles. “Um, anyway, I’ll leave you two to talk.” She then leaves the dining area, getting her hands busy with the other dishes prepared for the New Year.

The second that the two of them are left alone, there’s an awkward silence that wasn’t there, ever. Things have undeniably changed since that evening of Seokjin’s birthday. Suddenly, Yoongi feels as if they’re back to square one. It’s not easy to start a conversation with your best friend after weeks of not talking to each other—after weeks of purposely ignoring each other—at least on Yoongi’s end. Not to mention the very fact that Seokjin’s bound to turn into a whole damn Moon in a number of years. 

But Yoongi forces himself to try anyway, to get out of that square one. After all, he can’t waste any time. 

“It’s one of the best I’ve ever tasted, hyung. This tteokguk, I mean.” he says.

Seokjin’s eyes widen, “Really? I guess my mom did teach me well.” 

His ears start turning red, just like it always does when too much attention is on him. Seokjin was never a fan of too many people looking at him. He clears his throat before speaking, “H-How are you, Yoongi?”

Yoongi shrugs. “I’m… okay, I guess. You?”

“Same,” He sighs and chooses to stare at his fingers on the table instead of looking at Yoongi. ”Well, honestly no. Not really. I feel like shit.”

“Me too.” Yoongi nods. A moment passes before he speaks again. “Sorry I haven’t been answering your messages and calls. I just needed time to absorb, you know, everything you told me. It’s a lot to take in. To be honest, I still haven’t grasped the whole logic behind it, if there is any logic, that is.”

Seokjin glances up, but doesn’t meet his best friend’s eyes. “No, I totally understand that, Yoongi. It’s my fault that I didn’t tell you earlier. I’m really sorry.” 

Yoongi stirs his spoon in his bowl of soup as he thinks out loud. “Do you think it would have made any difference if you told me earlier? Who knows if I would have reacted differently? I’d be hearing the same thing anyway.”

“You have a point there.” The older directs his attention to his hands again, which were fidgeting. “But… But at least you would be hearing it from me. It won’t be some sort of secret I’ve been keeping from my best friend.”

Yoongi is still looking at the bowl in front of him, but the corner of his lips curls into a smile. He takes another spoonful into his mouth and almost melts into the taste of the dish. “Hyung, this is heaven, I swear. It’s great, even though it’s cooked by the Moon.”

Seokjin looks up, hearing the change of tone in Yoongi’s voice. He looks at his face, at his eyes for the first time that day, and he ends up smiling too. “Hey!”

“What!” the younger continues to tease, “You’re the Moon, aren’t you? Or you’ll become one, whatever that means.”

“I’m not the Moon yet , Yoongichi,” Seokjin clarifies, making gestures with his fingers and starting to sound like a TV host that gives daily trivia. “In fact, right now, I’m still… hu-moon .”

Instantly, Yoongi goes back to his poker face. “Okay, I’m leaving,” he deadpans and starts to stand. His best friend is quick to catch his wrist though. “No, please don’t,” he says in between laughs. Seokjin’s laughter is so contagious that Yoongi almost laughs himself. He just rolls his eyes to mask that. A second later, Seokjin clears his throat and pouts. “You haven’t finished the food I made.”

Yoongi shakes his head and sits back down, glancing at the smile on Seokjin’s face. They start catching up with each other. It’s only been a few weeks, but oh how he missed that stupid laugh, that warm aura. Oh, how he missed talking to him, listening to his stories. It’s only been a few weeks, but he missed his best friend so much. 

What is he gonna do when Seokjin leaves for good?

“So, um, when are you leaving?” Yoongi asks after they’ve pretty much covered what happened with their lives the past few weeks. He’s hoping that this won’t be one of their last conversations.

“Not any time soon. So don’t think about it too much for now, Yoongi.” Seokjin gives a comforting smile.

Yoongi breathes out a sigh of relief. Still, he asks for something more specific, just so he can prepare himself when the time comes. “Do you know when exactly?”

“Like an exact date?” Seokjin musters a laugh and shakes his head. “No, I’m not sure. All I know is that it’ll happen sometime after I turn 29.”

“That’s—” Yoongi does a bit of mental math, probably the quickest computation he’s ever done. And he looks at him. “That’s 11 years from now. Hyung, only 11 years left.”

Seokjin simply nods. “Yeah. There’s still plenty of time left, Yoongi. Don’t worry.” He sounds like he’s taking this lightly with the tone he’s using and the smile that doesn’t falter from his face. But Yoongi doesn’t fail to notice the way his eyes look downwards for a second, the quick flash of sadness that he’s trying to hide. Seokjin’s always been good at that—at putting on a happy face despite the struggles he’s facing—at reassuring others so they won’t be too anxious. Yoongi would know.

Yoongi frankly disagrees with Seokjin. Eleven years is a long time, but it’s not a long time when you’re aware—aware of certain things that come to an end. That’s why life and death are unpredictable. It makes it exciting or dreadful, depending on perspective. But for Yoongi, suddenly it feels like one of those “if you’re going to die tomorrow, what would you do?” type of questions. Yoongi is not prepared for anything like that.

That’s when he decides and promises silently to himself. He will make every moment with his best friend count. Every second needs to be cherished, every minute of those 11 years treasured. All before he loses him to the stars for the rest of eternity. 

*****

Indeed, time flies.

College is a pain in the ass. Only a few things are keeping Yoongi sane. One of them is that he actually likes his major, Composition under the College of Music, despite the workload. The other one is rooming with Seokjin who’s taking up Astronomy at the same university.

“Are you serious about this?”

“It’s fun! We get to study about me . And other stuff,” Seokjin said when Yoongi had asked him about his course after getting their acceptance letters.

Two years later, Yoongi finds Seokjin crouched over the study table in their dorm, papers scattered around him. The younger one shakes his head, a tiny smirk appearing on the corner of his lip as he closes the door and silently takes a picture of the scene.

It has become a habit of his to capture mundane Seokjin things like this. It’s not like he never took pictures when they were younger. It just so happens that ever since that New Year’s Day when he found out how much time left his best friend has on Earth, Yoongi has deliberately started taking more pictures, and videos even. It’s literally anything to everything that Seokjin does—posing like the supermodel he thinks he is, candid photos, stolen ones, or even their selfies. Sometimes, he also presses the sound recorder button on his phone when Seokjin is about to make another one of his stupid jokes, or when he’s going through the recipe of the new dish he’s trying to cook. Other times it’s when Seokjin feels particularly sociable and talks nonstop about God-knows-what. But Yoongi becomes more self-aware about what he’s doing when he finds himself opening his phone camera on quiet days when Seokjin is silently reading a book, or trying to get homework done. The younger would zoom onto the older’s face and then zoom out, not saying a word to let Seokjin know he’s being recorded. Half of the time Seokjin gets recorded, he isn’t aware of it. Yoongi feels a bit guilty about it. But then. But then—

There’s only so much Yoongi can save of Seokjin.

Yoongi keeps his phone immediately and enters their dorm. “Hyung,” Yoongi greets.

Seokjin sits up and looks at him with dead eyes. “Oh, hey. You’re here.”

The younger takes a peek at what his hyung is doing. The papers are filled with equations, computations, and erasures. “That seems fun,” he jokes.

Seokjin rolls his eyes. “ Real fun. You don’t know how many equations I get to memorize and the problems I have to solve. Ugh, why the fuck is there too much Math when you’re studying about space?!” 

Yoongi drops his bag on the floor and plops onto his bed, nearly snorting on his sheets. “You’re the one who said it’s gonna be fun. You did this to yourself.”

“Well, it is . But it’s just so—” Seokjin groans at the papers in front of him. 

Yoongi sits up and wonders out loud while he gets his laptop from the table to start working on a paper. “Why do you even have to go to college when you’re gonna become the Moon anyway?”

Seokjin shrugs and scratches his head with the other end of his pen. “Gotta live like a normal human being, you know?”

“You can live like a normal human being without having to study and go through all this shit.”

Seokjin gets up and walks toward Yoongi’s bed. “What—I’m not gonna miss out on college life just because I’m half-spirit.” He sits beside Yoongi and wraps an arm around the younger’s shoulders.

“Plus,” Seokjin flops down on the mattress just beside Yoongi, “we get to hang out all the time.”

Yoongi takes a second to digest that, until all he can manage to ask is “ This is hanging out?” while vaguely pointing at the scattered mess of papers Seokjin made all over the desk and floor.

“Yeah!” Seokjin is obviously saying it to convince himself too. Yoongi only raises an eyebrow at him. 

“Alright, fine. You know what, why don’t we hang out right now? Let’s get out of here and eat at that barbecue place. Come on.” He’s about to stand up when Yoongi shakes his head.

“Can’t, hyung. I have a paper due tomorrow morning.”

“What, and I have to submit that thing tomorrow too.” Seokjin points at his messy desk.

So Seokjin manages to drag Yoongi out of the room after a little more convincing. Anything for more time with his Seokjin-hyung, Yoongi thinks again.

Hanging out is usually just the two of them studying or eating together, or perhaps going out on a trip when they have free time. A lot of times though, they end up calling over their other friends that they met at university. 

“HEEEEEEYYYY!”

Yoongi hears a familiar booming voice from the entrance of the restaurant. He doesn’t have to turn to know that it’s their friend, Hoseok, who’s a year younger than Yoongi and technically two from Seokjin.

“Is it a treat, hyung? What’s the occasion?” Hoseok nudges Seokjin and pats Yoongi’s back. 

“Yeah hyung, what’s up? I was working on a presentation when Seok-ah started dragging me out of my room. I thought there was some sort of emergency.” Namjoon sits beside his roommate.

Seokjin thinks for a second and then shakes his head. “Nothing really, we’re all too stressed out! We need to catch a break for once.”

“Damn, right.” Jimin appears beside Yoongi. “I actually have shit due tomorrow, but fuck that we need a break. Taehyungie, should we get wasted?” he asks his best friend (or a boyfriend? Heck, it was never brought up) with a laugh. Taehyung, who Yoongi and Seokjin have known when they were younger but only got closer to in university, sits beside Jimin and just shrugs. “It’s only Tuesday, but eh, whatever.” 

“That’s the spirit!” Seokjin points the tongs at the two of them, before going back to the meat he’s grilling. (He meant that pun but it was something for Yoongi to catch on by himself, Seokjin only hopes he did.)

The guys complain about how they get dragged to the restaurant only to end up splitting up the bill anyway, Yoongi shushing them. “Guys, we’re broke as fuck. So anyone who wants to eat ramyeon for the nth time this month can go home now.”

Of course, everyone stays, each of them contributing to the grill and eating to their hearts’ content. They chat away through the night, ranting about the workload that’s awaiting them back in their apartments and dorms. Hoseok later initiates for group pictures, promising that he’ll send them right away to their Kakao group chat. Moments after, as expected, all of their phones ding. Yoongi immediately checks out the photos and downloads them. It’s a relatively blurry picture. Barbecue pubs especially down the street from the dorms literally have the worst exhaust to them that all the smoke from the grill just mixes into the closed space. But Yoongi doesn’t seem to mind as he hears Jimin laughing in the background and saying something about how wasted they already look in the pictures when they didn’t even drink all that much (the redness of Hoseok’s neck says otherwise).

It’s not every day that you get to spend time with the people you love. It’s not forever either that they’ll stay by your side.

Yoongi watches the rest of the orders being served—more meat, even alcohol. He checks his phone to look at the time and he just knows they’re pulling another all-nighter tonight. If they don’t pass out from the soju that is.

God bless their souls. Or whatever higher being there is that will help their asses with schoolwork.

everyone stays, each of them contributing to the grill and eating to their hearts’ content. They chat away through the night, ranting about the workload that’s awaiting them back in their apartments and dorms. Hoseok later initiates for group pictures, promising that he’ll send them right away to their Kakao group chat. Moments after, as expected, all of their phones ding. Yoongi immediately checks out the photos and downloads them. It’s a relatively blurry picture. Barbecue pubs especially down the street from the dorms literally have the worst exhaust to them that all the smoke from the grill just mixes into the closed space. But Yoongi doesn’t seem to mind as he hears Jimin laughing in the background and saying something about how wasted they already look in the pictures when they didn’t even drink all that much (the redness of Hoseok’s neck says otherwise).

Despite countless spontaneous gatherings like this—which happens more often than it should—and all the endless nights of cramming schoolwork and breaking down for five minutes only for them to act as nothing happened, somehow, both Seokjin and Yoongi do manage to graduate on time.

It’s crazy. One day they’re unpacking their stuff as they settle in their new dorm, half-excited and half-anxious about four years of college life. Next thing they know, they’re all dressed up, wearing togas and lining up for the most awaited day of their lives. The last ceremony to attend before they enter quote-unquote, ‘the real world ’ .

Yoongi thinks it’s quite funny that adults call it such, as if life in school isn’t considered the real world, a reality. Then again what even is real when your best friend is about to become a heavenly body in the night sky in six years or so?

Six years? Six years left, what the fuck?

“Kim Seokjin.”

Before he spirals down with his own thoughts yet again, Yoongi hears the said person’s name being called to receive his diploma. Yoongi snaps out of it and scrambles for his phone to take a video of this huge moment.

He presses the record button as Seokjin walks onstage, shakes the hand of the Dean of the School of Sciences and Technology (Yoongi has a moment of shock once again, and for the last time, that Seokjin seriously took an Astronomy degree) and moves to the centre for a photo—an official one that is. He bows, holding up his diploma in front of his chest, and flashes that endearing smile of his. A big smile grows on Yoongi’s face behind the phone as he taps the capture button to take photos while recording. He isn’t usually the stage mom type of friend but heck, he would’ve yelled out “that’s my best friend right there!” if he wasn’t going to get looks from the other students’ parents.

The professor by the podium starts calling another name and just when Seokjin is about to turn away, he faces the crowd once more and gives a dramatic flying kiss. The crowd obviously howls, especially Seokjin’s coursemates.

Yoongi’s smile only gets bigger, thankful that he hasn’t stopped recording yet. He just knew his best friend would pull something grand and memorable while it was his last time on stage for his university years.

Almost half an hour later, it’s his turn to come up the stage.

“Min Yoongi.”

Yoongi intends to get it over with quickly—walk up there, get the diploma, shake hands, bow, pose, smile for a couple of seconds just so his mother can take the picture, and then take his leave. But before he finishes that last step, he spots Seokjin waving from his seat sporting a giddy smile while holding his phone up high. Yoongi doesn’t have the best eyesight but he could instantly see his best friend from the crowd. 

Yoongi gives him a little wave back and then goes down the stage.

“Mom, I think you took enough pictures,” Yoongi whines, jaw aching from standing on the school grounds with the bouquet of flowers from his parents. The ceremony ended around 30 minutes ago and they’ve already taken all sorts of photos—a solo shot, one with his mom, one with his dad—at least three times.

“Oh just one more, darling! This is an important moment, you know? We wouldn’t want to forget this. Plus we’re so proud of you,” his mom says. Pretty familiar words. 

“Okay, son, ready?” his dad takes a step back and goes, “Okay one, two, three!” Yoongi forces another smile as the flash almost blinds his eyes.

“Ah, that’s good!” his mom says excitedly. Yoongi heaves and thinks they could finally go, until his mom looks around and mutters, “If we could just take one family photo before we leave.”

“Let’s just take a selfie, I’ll hold it up,” Yoongi says, about to take the camera.

“I’ll take it, Yoongi-ya!” Seokjin calls and jogs towards him, holding his own bouquet of flowers. He takes the camera from Yoongi as he greets Yoongi’s parents cheerfully.

Yoongi’s mom congratulates Seokjin as well, giving him a big hug like he’s her own son too. He practically is too.

“Thank you! Okay, here we go. Big smiles, everyone!” Seokjin raises the camera. “Especially you, Yoongi!” he adds, and Yoongi has no choice but to give his biggest smile. Anything for his hyung, he guesses.

After a couple more photos that Yoongi mutually insisted he’d take for Seokjin’s family, Yoongi’s mom taps the backs of both Yoongi and Seokjin. “You two need a photo together!” Mrs. Min says suddenly. Unsurprisingly, Mrs. Kim agrees to this, saying something about the boys growing up together and achieving things like this together.

Before Yoongi could even go on about having already too many photos, his and Seokjin’s parents were taking their positions in front of them. Seokjin puts an arm over his shoulders, and he does the same. Whatever, it’s not like he’ll get another graduation pic with Seokjin anyway.

Raising their flowers up and putting on the happiest smiles, they pose for the photo. Their parents check the photos right away and naturally drift into conversation while standing in the centre of the grounds. It seems being neighbours for years with sons who visit each other’s homes on a nearly daily basis gives them a lot of things to talk about.

Seokjin pulls up his phone and switches to selfie mode. “Let’s take another one!” He presses the button endlessly and Yoongi’s pretty sure there are about 50 of the same photo in there. Then quickly, Seokjin starts recording a video, yelling “We made it!” while turning around, arm still around Yoongi’s shoulders.

“We made it!” Yoongi screams as well. His phone is up too as he records this moment of him and his best friend in the whole damn universe jumping and making themselves dizzy in front of their university.

That night, they throw a party at Taehyung and Jimin’s place. The two moved out of their small dorms some time back and decided to rent a bigger apartment.

Initially, Seokjin and Yoongi just wanted to have a simple dinner with their friends. That pushed through, but there was no way that the other four would let them go without a huge celebration. To be fair, it’s more of a small get-together, but the energy in the apartment matches that of a frat house party with the non-stop karaoke and unlimited food and drinks.

After his fifth duet with Taehyung in a row, Jimin mutes the music and raises his glass, “Okay,” he clears his throat on the karaoke mic and then, “I’d like to take a break and give a toast to Seokjin-hyung and Yoongi-hyung!” He sways a bit, unable to keep his balance.

“Jimin, just sit your ass down. You’ll spill everything from the bottle,” Seokjin waves and tries to grab Jimin’s pants to make him sit down. Yoongi chuckles at the scene, quite amused at the younger who’s now borderline drunk. It’s quite an experience to see Jimin, a strong drinker, already out of it. 

Jimin’s drink would’ve truly spilt onto himself if Taehyung didn’t catch it on time and replaced it with a cup that was almost empty. Paying no attention to what just happened, the tinier one continued.

“To our hyungs! For graduating and for being the best hyungs one could ever ask for!” Jimin hiccups and giggles for a second before continuing. “Not that I asked for any, but you appeared anyway, so I’m grateful to you! My hyungs, my uni parents. Congratulations!” He raises his cup higher and then lowers it to drink, only to realise that it’s a dry and empty cup. Jimin whines for a refill, Taehyung trying to pull him to sit instead.

“Well, there was no need to get all cheesy. But thank you!” Seokjin comments.

“No joke though, we’re gonna miss you both,” Namjoon says, sounding a little down. Seokjin turns to the middle child of them all, cooing and giving Namjoon a hard tap on his thigh. 

“Don’t be so dramatic about this! It’s not like we’ll forget you once we start working,” Seokjin claims, trying to lift up the mood of the room. It’s silent for a bit before Taehyung breaks it off.

“We’re not sad hyung, it just feels different when you two won’t be around here,” Taehyung says while he continues rubbing and patting Jimin’s back. The boy is hiccuping and nearly falling over in slumber. 

Seokjin offers a smile and shakes his head, “Come on now, not much will change! We’re both just one call away if you need us. Right, Yoongi?” 

Yoongi only realises that his attention is being demanded after the second time Seokjin calls his name. 

“Hm? Ah- Oh, yeah. It’s not like we’re gonna disappear all of a sudden,” Yoongi says casually, taking a sip from his beer bottle. He doesn’t notice how Seokjin looks at him sternly, how his words may have hit quite differently to his best friend. Even Yoongi realises what he just said.

“Y-Yeah, exactly,” Seokjin almost chokes out.

“That’s a promise, okay?” Hoseok says, holding up his pinky finger in front of the two hyungs. Yoongi stares at it for a second, an eyebrow up, until he ends up sealing it first.

“Promise,” Yoongi says.

Seokjin does the same, “Promise,” he mumbles with a small smile.

The night is still young, the great Nicki Minaj once said.

That explains why the group continues bouncing back and forth with strings of memories from their college years, some others from high school and younger—specifically for Seokjin and Yoongi. There are some stories too that Taehyung shares about his time in Daegu, the moment his family followed Yoongi’s.

“Can’t believe we’re already done with college,” Seokjin mutters after everyone except him and Yoongi has passed out.

Yoongi nods. “Tell me about it. It feels like yesterday when we were driving out of our neighbourhood.” 

“Yeah. Now we’re here,” Seokjin says, sipping from his drink. “What happens next, Yoongichi?”

He shrugs. “Life, I guess? Gotta start finding a job and stuff. You know, adulting shit.”

“What about that music company you interviewed for your thesis?”

“Eh, I don't know. Maybe. I guess I’ll look into it.” Then Yoongi turns to Seokjin. “How ‘bout you, hyung? Are you gonna join KASI or NASA or something since you have that degree?” Seokjin only shakes his head and gives a laugh, while Yoongi snickers. “What! It’s a serious question, hyung. Though I admit. It’s gonna be quite funny if the Moon joins NASA.”

Seokjin falls silent and stares ahead. A moment of silence passes before he asks Yoongi, “Hey, what was that about earlier?”

“What do you mean?” Yoongi stares off into the distance, taking a sip of his leftover drink.

“ It’s not like we’re gonna disappear all of a sudden ?”

Of course, Yoongi knew Seokjin would bring this one up. Seokjin eventually shakes his head, “You know, it’s nothing. I’m probably just thinking too much of it.”

Yoongi gets it. It wasn’t.. exactly the best way to put it that Seokjin and Yoongi were going to be physically distant from the rest of the guys. Still. Seokjin hesitates again and heaves a sigh. “It’s just.. eventually, I am literally going to disappear all of a sudden. You won’t, but I will.”

Seokjin continues, now with a frown, “And I thought—I don’t know, maybe you were being, sarcastic? Or maybe you’re still angry about the whole thing? I’m just—”

“Hey hyung, I didn’t mean it like that. I just meant that we’d be there for the guys when they need us. That’s it. I’m not—I’m not angry or anything. It’s been a while since I found out and it’s still whacked, but it is what it is, right? You said that yourself.” 

Seokjin chews on his lip and looks up to meet Yoongi’s gaze. “I’m sorry, Yoongi. About this. About everything.”

Yoongi stares at Seokjin and bumps his side lightly, sighing. “Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault. We’ll make do with what we have.”

At that, Seokjin smiles and drapes an arm over Yoongi’s shoulders. “Yeah. We will.”

The two continue watching the night sky from where they’re sat. They stay in comfortable silence until Yoongi, still holding his bottle of beer, points to the moon. “So hyung, is there another moon spirit there now?”

Seokjin raises an eyebrow, “So you’re curious now.”

Yoongi laughs.

*****

Life happens.

Life happens and for the next few years, Yoongi and Seokjin aren’t attached to the hip. Sure, birthday and holiday traditions are kept. They talk, hang out, drink as much as they can—as much as time will allow. But it’s not as often as before when they lived close to each other, and with each other, just like all friends who grow older and get busier with, well, real life as their parents have said.

Life happens and the whole Seokjin is the Moon thing, plus that promise Yoongi had made to himself, have both been seemingly forgotten. Seemingly . They still sit at the back of his mind, and capturing memories of Seokjin has already become second nature to him whenever they get the chance to meet. Only now, he has other priorities getting in the way.

So when Namjoon informs everyone in the group chat that Seokjin is in the hospital, Yoongi wants to drop everything and rush to get there, not caring about the responsibilities he’d potentially leave on air. Well, that’s at least what he wants to do more than anything, but he can’t . He’s stuck in a meeting with an artist that he and his senior producer will be working with. After seeing the message from Namjoon, he could hardly focus on anything else. A sick feeling grows in his stomach as he gets more and more frustrated and worried, thoughts drifting to his best friend’s life—his whole predicament, and the unspoken promise Yoongi had made. That’s his priority right now. For the first and probably the only time, he wills and hopes that the seconds and minutes would go faster, just so he could get his ass out of the office.

Yoongi hopes Seokjin is okay. He has to be.

After the meeting ends, Yoongi requests to take the rest of the day off and takes the first cab to the hospital that Namjoon mentioned in their group chat. Well, at least not after a flood of messages from Yoongi demanding where Seokjin was and why things have turned out the way they did.

Yoongi barges into the emergency room, passing bed after bed and curtain after curtain. Everything’s a blur until he finally spots Seokjin, still dressed in his own clothes and sitting on his own bed while leisurely scrolling away on his phone.

“Hyung,” Yoongi starts as he skids to a stop in front of Seokjin, out of breath. Seokjin looks up with a surprised look on his face. “Hyung, what happened? Are you okay? Are you hurt? Why—”

“Yoongi? Hey. Calm down,” Seokjin interrupts, slowly bringing an arm up and signalling his best friend to catch a breather. “I’m fine. What are you even doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be at work?”

Yoongi sits on the chair beside the bed. “M-My meeting’s over anyway. I took the rest of the day off and got here as fast as I could.”

“Who—Did Namjoon tell you?”

“Namjoon sent it to the group. But what the hell happened, hyung? You haven’t answered me.”

Seokjin rubs his temples and heaves a sigh as he mutters, “Damn it. I told him not to tell you guys, especially you.”

Yoongi is all the more bewildered at the revelation, “What the hell? Why?” 

“This is exactly why!” Seokjin gestures vaguely. “I knew you’d react like this over nothing! What if you were the one who got into trouble while hurrying here?! I didn’t want you to worry because I’m fine , Yoongi. Seriously. I was gonna let you know about this by the weekend anyway. We’re supposed to meet, remember?”

He’s right. Still, Yoongi’s not stopping until he gets to the bottom of things. “Yeah, ‘cause I can’t be worried sick hyung. I can’t be worried sick over my best friend in the emergency room,” he adds sarcastically. 

Seokjin manages to crack a stupid, tiny smile as he shakes his head. “Trust me, you don’t want to hear it. It’s pretty dumb.”

“You know what, I’ll just ask Namjoon. He’s the one who brought you here right? Where the fuck is he anyway?” Yoongi looks around for some sign of Namjoon, who’s staying over Seokjin’s place because he has to attend a week-long seminar in the same area. Yoongi reaches out for his phone and starts looking for Namjoon’s number.

“He had to take a call,” Seokjin says, pointing backwards with his thumb. “He had to take half the day off because of what happened.” 

Yoongi sighs and then keeps his phone in his pocket. “What on earth happened?” Seokjin is quiet. “Why didn’t he give the damn details in his message? Way to keep everyone hanging.”

Seokjin rolls his eyes and lets out a frustrated groan. “Fine, fine. So, uh, this morning, when I stepped out of my unit, I was- I was walking, right? Then a huge fucking bee was flying right at my face. I tried to avoid it, of course, but I didn’t see my neighbour’s kid’s toy truck lying around on the floor. Accidentally stepped on it and slipped.”

Yoongi stares at him. It is pretty dumb, he must admit. But he quickly notices that Seokjin has only been moving his right arm all along. “Are you hurt, hyung?”

“No major injuries whatsoever. My back hurt for a bit but I’m fine now. This arm just feels a teeny tiny bit painful,” he raises his right arm, showing his elbow, “I think it’s because I got a few bruises here and there—”

“God, hyung, will you be more careful next time? Please.”

“It’s all good now! I’ll be discharged soon. So like I said, you don’t have to worry about anything, Yoongichi.”

Namjoon arrives shortly after and thanks Yoongi for being there. Yoongi and Seokjin send him off back to work and not to worry anymore, though Yoongi makes a mental note to tell Namjoon, later on, to stop keeping them hanging if and when something like this happens again.

Yoongi stays with Seokjin until he gets discharged. They order some food for dinner at Seokjin’s place and Yoongi takes a photo of it, and another stolen one of Seokjin stuffing his face. Yoongi stays until Seokjin falls asleep that night.

Once he leaves, Yoongi finds himself deep in thought on the way home. There are so many things he wanted to say to Seokjin while he was in the height of his emotions back at the emergency room. So when he gets home, he writes everything down—how worried and frustrated he was, how thankful he is that Namjoon was there, how dumb that whole accident was, but also how his neighbour should literally keep their shit in their home, how that stupid bee shouldn’t have attacked Seokjin like that, because Seokjin doesn’t like bees, how he wouldn’t know what he’d do if something worse had happened to him, if his time as a human was cut even shorter than it’s supposed to be.

And that just pulls Yoongi back to reality—the reality that while life happens, time goes by quickly too. It won’t be long until Seokjin needs to leave.

About a year and a few months after that incident, the company Yoongi works for relocates much farther from where he’s currently staying. He doesn’t really have any problem with it, but when a more convenient solution appears, why would he pass it up?

That’s how he becomes Seokjin’s apartment neighbour living in the room directly across from his.

When Seokjin heard the news, he was extremely excited. Even more excited than Yoongi was, or at least more excited than how much Yoongi showed. He even takes a day off just to help Yoongi move in.

“You know hyung, I’m a grown-ass adult. You didn’t have to miss a day at work,” Yoongi mutters as they both carry the last few boxes up the stairs.

Seokjin shifts a little, adjusting the boxes on his arms. “Don’t worry about it, Yoongichi. I’m a freakin’ university librarian . No one will even notice I’m gone!” They reach their floor and walk straight to Yoongi’s room. “Well, some kids might miss me and my astronomy trivia of the day. But I left some notes to the assistant librarian. She can handle it.” 

“Doubt people will chat her up about astronomy.” Yoongi goes in first, while Seokjin follows right behind him, closing the door with his foot.

“Why? She’s got it, all she has to do is to read the notes when the students—”

Yoongi puts the boxes down with a big thump, and then he dusts off his hands. “Hyung, she’s not an astronomy major like you. Besides, you overhear students talking about satellites and you butt in just because it’s about space.” 

“For your information, Mr. Min, after that one incident, they ask me questions whenever they come up to the counter to borrow a book!” Seokjin explains, stretching his arms after he puts the boxes down as well.

“Yeah, because they realise the librarian looks good, so they chat you up when they have the chance. Let’s not forget that your assistant needs to shut you up every single time. How ironic for a librarian,” Yoongi starts checking the boxes, thinking about which ones he should unload first. 

“So you think I look good?” Seokjin asks with a smug.

“That’s really all you got from that?”

The older sits and relaxes on the couch. “Well, what can I say, the kids love hearing about the stars, the sun, the asteroids. And the Moon that looks good.”

Yoongi snorts and gets up next to the piled boxes, staring at them deep in thought. “I don’t know where to start,” he mutters to himself.

“Are you not hungry yet?” Seokjin asks as he also looks around at the boxes and the mostly empty space of an apartment.

“Eh,” Yoongi reaches for one of the boxes to check its content. He finds some books for his light reading, some that he has finished but will probably re-read when he finds the time to. There are notebooks too, some with lyrics he had jotted down, some with random musings, and one of which has pictures and papers pasted or simply tucked in between the pages. Memories. 

“Yoongi,” Seokjin calls for the third time.

“Huh?” Yoongi jolts at the voice calling him and hand tapping his back. Yoongi immediately snaps the notebook shut, puts it underneath the books, and closes the box. “Sorry, uh, what were you saying?”

Seokjin is quiet for a second, trying to study Yoongi’s reaction. “I’ve been talking to you and you weren’t listening to me.” His eyes follow the box that Yoongi just pushed away. “What’s in the box?”

“It’s uh—for my songs. For work.” Yoongi clears his throat and gets up. “What were you saying?”

Seokjin sighs. “I said , we’ve been carrying boxes all morning. It’s mid-afternoon now, we should probably get something to eat.”

Yoongi quickly nods, slipping his hands into his pockets. “Yeah. Yeah, we should.”

Yoongi is thankful that his office had decided to move to another building close to where his best friend lives. He’s thankful that the person who lived in this unit decided to look for another place to stay. He’s thankful because there are only less than three years left. At least he’s closer now. At least they can spend more time together.

He and Seokjin practically live with each other, one crashing the other’s place every so often to cook, eat, drink, binge-watch shows, hang out, or maybe even sleep over. 

With that, he has more opportunities to document memories with Seokjin. Over the years, his phone storage became full of photos, videos, and sound memos of Seokjin. Yoongi used to not have almost anything in his gallery. At least until he was 18. Most of his media have already been backed up in a separate hard drive. He has also taken the time to craft a journal-slash-scrapbook—the one he was browsing through on the day he moved, right before Seokjin interrupted him and bugged him about grabbing late lunch. It has photos of Seokjin, of them together, with receipts, even a stupid candy wrapper from the bag of snacks Seokjin had given him some time ago. He had not updated it for a while before seeing it again that day and it's just given him mixed feelings of relief that he didn’t leave it behind. But there was also a wave of nostalgia and sadness. It reminded him even more about how he could not have a certain someone exist in his life forever, and so he’s saving the most he can of him.

The apartment complex eventually also becomes the default go-to of their friends. The guys are often at either Seokjin’s or Yoongi’s place, having home-cooked meals, playing video games, or having a movie night.

Their friends come over, even if it’s not for all of them to gather. Jimin particularly decided to hang out with the two eldest ones on one Friday night after an event he attended nearby. The three of them have dinner at Seokjin’s place, drinking and catching up like most adults do.  

“Are you kidding me? A dumpling? You two fought over a fucking dumpling ?” Yoongi says in disbelief, putting his foot down from the loveseat where he was cosied up a second ago. Seokjin, on the other hand, cackles beside their guest on the couch.

Jimin shakes his head and laughs along with the eldest in the room. It’s been a couple of hours and they’ve had more than enough drinks to get them to this tipsy state, talking about anything and everything. “I know. I laugh about it now ‘cause it’s literally the most stupid thing to fight about. But at the time we were both angry and Taehyung didn’t come home for like, three days. And I was just scared I’d lose him,” he pauses, and the room goes silent, “—because of fucking dumplings.”

“Well, good thing you two were able to fix things,” Seokjin says after taking another sip, his cheeks and ears a bit redder now than usual. “I mean—who am I kidding, you’re Jimin and Taehyung!”

Yoongi agrees and raises his glass to Seokjin and then to Jimin, who’s staring at both of them. “You’re Taehyung and Jimin and no dumb dumpling can ruin—”

“ Dumbling ,” Seokjin snorts. The other two look at him in disbelief and Seokjin laughs at himself. “Hyung, you’re getting old. Your jokes are old man jokes,” Jimin says lightheartedly with a smile.

“Trust me, it has nothing to do with his age,” Yoongi comments, “He’s been at it since his conception.” Jimin laughs, nodding. “Anyway, yeah. No dumb dumpling. Dumbling ,” Jimin repeats and Seokjin laughs along.

“Right. No dumpling can…” Yoongi’s words fall and fade, his mind going hazy and his thoughts buffering. “N-nothing can ruin Jimin and Taehyung. Both of you.”

Jimin breaks into a smile at the conclusion of it, “Yeah, I don’t know what I’ll do without him.”

Yoongi smiles to himself and glances over at Seokjin. He hates to admit it but he gets it. What would he do when the time comes, when Seokjin has to go? He doesn’t know. The latter doesn’t notice either how Yoongi is staring at him, his attention on Jimin as he pats his back in understanding. When he looks away though, Yoongi snaps out of it and schools his expression. “Oh why don’t you just go and get married,” he says, pointing his glass at the youngest in an attempt to not appear suspicious. 

Jimin holds a hand over his heart and giggles. “Hyung, is that code for ‘I’ll be your best man’?”

Yoongi scrunches his nose in faux disgust, “Best man my ass. Didn’t Hoseok volunteer long ago?”

“Hey, I wanna be best man!” Seokjin whines.

“Nobody is fighting over who gets to be best man! Leave Jimin and Taehyung alone!” Yoongi whines back. 

Once the laughter and jokes about a wedding plan subside, there’s a beat of silence. Jimin looks at the remnants of their session and then at the two, “Seriously though, what do you two think you’re gonna be doing in five years?”

Yoongi scoffs and shrugs. It’s only when Jimin stares at him longer than he realises the younger is actually waiting for a genuine answer. Yoongi gestures vaguely, “Working or something? I don’t know. I mean, if I could produce hits, of course, that’d be great. I just don’t want to fall into the trap of corporate slavery.”

Jimin chuckles, expecting such answer from his Yoongi-hyung. He turns to Seokjin, who’s leaning on the couch with a relaxed smile. He lets out a laugh, sitting up and picking up his glass, “It’s not like I’ll be here long enough to know that.”

Jimin’s eyes widen in confusion, “What?”

Yoongi chokes immediately on his drink and quickly puts down his glass on the table. Seokjin realises what he’s just said, panicking, “ Oh . Oh, fuck.” He glances right away at Yoongi, who’s rubbing his hands on his pants.

“Why won’t you be here, hyung? What do you mean?” Jimin frowns in concern. 

“Shit, no. Uh, what I mean to say is...” Seokjin closes and opens his mouth, trying to find the words to come up with an explanation. An explanation that can be digested. He suddenly feels himself sobering up quickly with the anxiety creeping up behind him.

“Hyung, are you leaving us? You’re leaving and you weren’t planning on telling us? Or is it something else? Oh my God, are you sick? What—”

Yoongi cuts him off, “All he means is h-he’s not sure what’s gonna happen in the next few years. Right, hyung?” He eyes Seokjin, trying to send a message to follow his lead.

“Y-Yeah! That’s exactly what I meant to say,” Seokjin sputters, voice cracking in tones he himself doesn’t recognise.

Jimin stares at Seokjin and then at Yoongi, chuckling to himself. Yoongi already hates where this is going.

“You know, I may be out of it but I can smell bullshit. What’s going on, really?”

Seokjin and Yoongi look at each other and Yoongi tries to say something, but nothing comes out of him the second Jimin has his attention on him.

Jimin scoffs, using all his energy to stand from Seokjin’s couch and grab his things. “Wow, so much for being friends. Guess we weren’t on the same page after all.”

“Jimin, wait.” Seokjin grabs Jimin’s forearm before he gets too far, eyes pleading for the younger to sit back down. 

“Hyung,” Yoongi says with worry painted on his face. He himself had a horrible time processing the whole thing and he’s just scared how Jimin will take it—how anyone else will take it for that matter. Will they think it’s a joke? Will they get angry? Will they treat their Seokjin-hyung differently? It took weeks for Yoongi to grasp the idea of Seokjin not being entirely human.

“It’s fine, Yoongi.” Seokjin nods. “It’s fine.”

He tells Jimin everything, the same way he told Yoongi about it. Jimin stays silent for the entirety of it, patiently listening to what’s going on with Seokjin.

Jimin eventually breaks into laughter, while the other two watch him. Seokjin bites at his lip. They had expected this kind of reaction, which is why they had been hesitant all these years to even bring it up to anyone else. When Jimin notices that no one is laughing along, he stops, wiping away tears from the corners of his eyes. “Why’s no one else laughing?”

Yoongi sighs. “‘cause it’s not funny, Jimin. That’s our reality.”

“How drunk are you, hyung? Both of you?” Jimin laughs mockingly, shaking his head. “I’m not drunk enough for this.” He reaches out for the bottle in front of him and takes a swig directly from it. 

“I know you don’t believe me,” Seokjin says. “I never expected you to but, I hoped—”

Jimin puts the bottle back on the table with a loud thud. “Hyung, I told you I can smell bullshit. Which book did you take this from?”

“Look, Jimin,” Yoongi starts and Jimin shoots him a pointed look. “You really think Seokjin-hyung will lie to you about something like this?”

“You tell me, hyung. This sounds more absurd than the stupid dumpling incident.” Jimin is raising his voice now. It always ends badly when Jimin gets upset to this extent.

“Absurd as it sounds it’s true and I don’t care if you think—”

“Yoongi,” Seokjin tries to cut him off but Yoongi continues on.

“—Anyway it’s bound to happen in less than three fucking years. So you can go on and forget about it. Pretend like you never knew about it, Jimin. It’s up to you. Whatever happens, he’ll be gone and you know why.” Yoongi grabs his drink from the table and chugs it, letting the burn on his throat wash out the despair he’s been trying to delay and tuck away.

Yoongi doesn’t mean to sound so angry and upset, he really doesn’t. He glances at his two friends, immediately wishing he could have said things in a calmer manner. He’s not even sure what he’s mad about. Is it Jimin laughing at Seokjin and calling his situation bullshit? Is it because Seokjin’s last days on earth are getting closer and closer? Is it because they finally could have been sharing the burden of carrying this ‘secret’—if it should be called such—to someone else in their friend group, only to end up getting laughed at?

Yoongi sighs and gets up, grabbing his jacket to leave. “I’m going back to my unit.”

“Wait, you’re not crashing here anymore?” Seokjin asks with pure disappointment on his face.

Yoongi shakes his head. “You two have a good night.” He takes a few steps towards the door before stopping and looking back to say, “I’m sorry for losing it. Hyung. Jimin.”

Jimin doesn’t respond. Seokjin, on the other hand, starts to get up. “Yoongi—”

“Night,” Yoongi cuts him off then walks out the door.

That night ends up being another sleepless one. The alcohol not doing enough for the dread to wash away.

They don’t stay mad at each other after that night, but none of them mentions it either. In fact, everything stays the same, as if the secret wasn’t accidentally spilt. Yoongi isn’t sure either if Jimin remembers the entire story since neither he nor Seokjin has heard anything about it from him.

Well, not until months later at the birthday dinner that Hoseok organizes for Namjoon.

The group is having a few drinks and catching up while Seokjin relishes the last order of meat on the table. Gone are the days when they all went crazy at parties, getting shitfaced hours before an 8 AM class. Despite that, spending time with the guys is still something they look forward to every two months at the very least. Yoongi smiles at the thought as he watches them from the veranda of the restaurant. He stands outside, deciding to get some fresh air and let all the junk he just consumed go down somehow.

With his bottle of Hoegaaarden still in hand, he turns around and looks at the view in front of him: a cityscape with lights making up for the lack of stars that night. There are a few thin clouds in the sky, which just makes the moon’s brightness more striking. A busy city like Seoul isn’t the best place to look for stars, but Yoongi thinks this will do. 

“Hyung, what are you doing out here?” He turns and sees Jimin approaching to lean on the railing next to him, carrying his own beer bottle.

Yoongi shrugs, “Breathing in some fresh air if you can call it that, enjoying the view.”

“What view?” Jimin asks, and when Yoongi gestures vaguely to the scene he’s been watching, the younger looks around and questioningly looks back at him. Yoongi laughs, “I know it’s not breathtaking or whatever, but it’s still nice. The lights, the sky.”

Jimin nods slowly, seeming to understand. A beat passes and he swirls his beer bottle, “I bet it’ll be prettier when Seokjin-hyung’s up there.”

Yoongi’s entire body runs cold despite the alcohol in his system and his smile fades as he turns to the younger, who’s peering at the sky. “So… you remember, huh.”

“Of course I do. It’s pretty memorable,” Jimin laughs shortly. Yoongi stares at his face, trying his best to take in if this will have to be another attempt at convincing the younger that he and Seokjin weren’t lying that night at the apartment. Yet he doesn’t see any hint of mockery or doubt. Yoongi is hopeful this time.

“We assumed… we assumed that you were too drunk to remember. You never mentioned it again or anything.”

Jimin smiles. “Isn’t it supposed to be a secret, hyung? The last few times we hung out, we were always with the guys.” He looks back at the scene where Taehyung is trying to get a mildly tipsy Namjoon to do a trendy dance with him and Hoseok. 

Yoongi sips his beer, looking back at the other three. He lets a moment pass before he asks, “You really believe us?”

“Honestly, it’s all so,” Jimin sighs, “I don’t know, it’s weird and out of this world—”

“Literally,” Yoongi says with a grin.

“Yeah, literally.” Jimin laughs. “But I’ve been thinking about it and—you’re right. Seokjin-hyung wouldn’t lie about these things. He jokes a lot and looks like he doesn’t take things seriously but he’s not a liar, and you aren’t either. So even if, even if I don’t understand any of these, this much I know. That you wouldn’t lie to me.”

Yoongi smiles at the admission. He does understand now why Seokjin easily decided to let Jimin know everything, that he wouldn’t judge. That he would accept things as it is. Not that the other three wouldn’t, but Jimin has always been so emotionally intelligible—save for the entire fight he got into with Taehyung because of some dumpling.

“I still don’t understand it either, but the least I—we can do is make every moment worth it for hyung. And us too.”

“I’m sorry hyung, for the things I said that night,” Jimin says softly and looks down at the concrete floor.

Yoongi shakes his head with a smile and walks closer to pat his friend’s back. “Don’t worry about it. We knew you’d react that way. I wasn’t any better when I found out.” Out of the corner of his eye, Yoongi sees a figure walking towards the door. “I do think you should talk to him about it though.”

Jimin presses his lips together and nods. “I will.”

“HEY!” A yell startles the two of them. “The fuck are you two doing out here? It’s freezing! Get in and close the door!”

“Oh stop overreacting, hyung. It’s not that cold,” Yoongi walks in and does as he’s told to anyway. 

They go on some more about how cold it is out and how weak Seokjin is in the cold. Jimin fondly watches the two bicker. He smiles to himself, thinking about the way Yoongi and Seokjin would argue about the smallest, most stupid things. But that’s what makes them Yoongi and Seokjin - their reliable hyungs who are way too messy and chaotic together but will always be the first to defend and stick up for each other.

“Hey,” Jimin calls and it catches both Seokjin and Yoongi’s attention. “Can we take a picture? The view’s beautiful!” he continues, looking at the two and then at the cityscape.

“Only if we go back inside right away,” Seokjin says with a pout. That elicits a laugh from the younger.

“Yeah, yeah, okay. Your wish is our command or whatever,” Yoongi says with a smile, walking back to the door and out.

Seokjin stands between the two of them and puts his arms over their shoulders, immediately flashing that sweet smile of his. Jimin holds his phone up so all three of them, plus a glimpse of the night cityscape with a glinting light from the moon, could be seen in the photo.

“1, 2, 3, smile!” Jimin exclaims and taps the shutter button multiple times. “Okay, let’s go, let’s go! Namjoon’s about to share his cake!” Seokjin rushes to open the door again.

Both Yoongi and Jimin laugh. Of course, Seokjin will think of the cake first.

*****

Seokjin didn’t lie about the fact that he has to leave and become the Moon to keep the world running.

They hear the news—extreme low tides in various countries every few months, some nights being darker and longer than usual according to the accounts of different people, and seasons in some countries starting earlier than usual. These don’t happen too often that year, but they do occur and it’s too strange for people not to notice. 

Yoongi doesn’t see the connection at first—assuming that all this is because of climate change that has been gradually happening for ages. His thoughts only change when he stumbles upon a viral article about an extremely low tide on a famous beach that lasted for approximately four days. It reminds him of something he studied back in high school, probably. He isn’t so sure. And so a little bit of searching confirms his thoughts—tides are indeed connected to the moon. Then as if it’s an event reminder on his phone, he checks the calendar once again.

A few months left.

Of course there’s only a few months left. It’s already autumn, around 10 months since Seokjin celebrated his 28th birthday. It all makes more sense now, as these events only started happening that year.

He’s not sure if Seokjin is aware that it’s the moon causing all this. The only comments he gives when he sees news about the occurrences are, “Oh, I hope the whales are okay,” “I hope the crabs don’t get hurt. Namjoon-ah will be sad about it,” “I hope people don’t get too cold.” Nothing about how the moon might be connected to these. Of course, Seokjin would have continued his days this way. No mentions of who he is, and what he’s meant to be doing before he turns 30. 

Countless times throughout his life, Yoongi has been reminded that Seokjin will have to go. He remembers, but at this point, he no longer freaks out about it nor panics about how time is flying so fast, how there’s a literal ticking clock for Seokjin. You could say Yoongi has become numb to it. Not exactly, but almost. He knows it will hurt, but it’s meant to happen and he can’t do anything about it anymore. He has already accepted it a long time ago now—or more like he had to. 

“Yoongichi! Are you ready?” Seokjin asks after Yoongi opens the door. 

“Yeah, let’s go,” Yoongi says with a yawn. Seokjin is about to respond, but Yoongi interrupts as he closes the door behind him, “Keep it down, hyung. The neighbours are asleep.” It’s literally three in the morning of a cold December and he’s a little bit too excited.

Of course, he is. It’s the day before his birthday and they’re going fishing. Fishing in winter.

Seokjin has always enjoyed water sports, swimming, and everything that has to do with being by the water, even if he doesn’t get to often. Lately though, for some reason, he has been drawn to water, to the ocean more than ever. Just earlier that year, he asked Yoongi multiple times if they could visit the beach. It’s not that he’s never been to one, he has just been insisting on it more recently. The first time they went—around March—Seokjin just couldn’t help but run around the sand and marvel at the sight, taking multiple videos, even including Yoongi in one of them. 

“Wah, the sea! Look at the sea!” he had said, switching the camera to selfie mode, capturing Yoongi as well.

“Wow, the sea,” the latter had imitated in a flat tone, completely different from the gummy smile he flashes. Seokjin laughed and moved the camera to show the waves crashing on the shore. 

One thing Seokjin really enjoys and wants to keep doing, again and again, is fishing. He drags Yoongi along with him too. In fact, that year, they probably gone at least once or twice a month. It’s not that Yoongi hates fishing, but he doesn’t like it that much —at least not the same way Seokjin does. He goes because, well, it makes Seokjin happy. Nothing makes Yoongi happier than spending time with Seokjin and seeing him all giddy and excited, even if he rarely catches any fish. 

Today must be his lucky day though.

Hours after they left their apartment, Seokjin and Yoongi are finally standing side by side on a boat in the middle of Gangneung. It has been really quiet for a while until this moment—both of them waiting, waiting, and hoping that they’d catch something valuable with their rods.

“Yoongi! Yoongi!” Seokjin suddenly calls out loudly.

“What, what, what!” Yoongi awkwardly shuffles closer to him, dragging his own rod along. “Did you catch one?”

“It’s stuck! I think I’ve caught one!” Seokjin pulls the rod and begins reeling it in with all his strength. He struggles for a few seconds while Yoongi quickly pulls out his rod from the water to capture this moment on his phone. And then from the water, they see a mackerel being lifted. Seokjin yells in excitement. Yoongi does the same.

“Hyung, you did it! You caught a fish!” he says, still filming as Seokjin struggles to move the rod and put the fish in the bucket. He takes a closer look at the mackerel after it’s separated from the hook. “Wow, this is probably the biggest fish I’ve ever caught!” 

Yoongi stops the video and picks up his own rod with a smile on his face. He waits to catch a fish for himself. Although he continues to wait, all he could think about is how content he already is seeing Seokjin be able to catch something—about how he wouldn’t trade for anything else when he gets to already see Seokjin this happy. He thinks he could just go home like this.

Seokjin prepares another bait to start another round of fishing. He stands beside Yoongi again and casts his fishing line. “Yoongi, I’m happy,” he says, “I’m so so happy.”

Yoongi assumes it’s about the fish at first. But he glances at the older and sees the way Seokjin smiles softly, looking at the water. Seokjin repeatedly says he’s happy, his voice getting softer the more he says it. 

“Me too,” Yoongi says in the same volume. Yoongi contemplates before he adds, “I’m proud of you, hyung.”

They stay in the waters of Gangneung for a few more hours, Yoongi catching two fish, albeit smaller than what Seokjin got. The latter catches another big one, a few minutes after Yoongi decides to finish up.

“Hyung, smile!” Yoongi says out of the blue. He has his phone out, already taking pictures of Seokjin even before catching his attention to take another one. Seokjin gives a huge grin as he holds up the rod so that the mackerel is beside his face, letting this speak for his big catch. Yoongi offers to take more photos, but of Seokjin and the two fish that he’s caught. Seokjin immediately takes up the offer and happily strikes different poses for the camera.

“Sashimi for late lunch today!” he half yells to the waters, dusting off his hands. He then leans onto the railing and takes in the view of the sea.

Then he waves at someone or something.

Yoongi catches this and looks in the direction Seokjin is waving at. Does he see someone that he recognises? Is there another boat nearby that Yoongi doesn’t see? He goes up to him to get a closer look. Seokjin stops waving but he continues to look in the direction, whatever it is. Yoongi stands beside him, trying to figure out who or what on earth has his best friend’s attention. But he doesn’t see anything. Not a boat or perhaps a creature. Nothing but endless water.

Seokjin seems to notice Yoongi’s confused expression right away, questions written all over his face. “It’s the Ocean Spirit,” he says calmly and a little more quietly so that Yoongi’s the only one who could hear. “This is only the third time I’ve seen it, but I know it’s usually around when we go fishing.”

Yoongi glances at him for a second, just to see if he’s serious. He even waits for a follow-up gag that Seokjin might add, but he doesn’t. He himself is half-spirit after all.  

“How do you know it’s always around when we fish?” Yoongi asks out of curiosity as he turns to the ocean again and watches the waters, knowing full well that he won’t see what Seokjin does.

Seokjin shrugs, “I just do. I can feel it.” A beat passes. “It says hello,” Seokjin taps Yoongi on the shoulder.

“Um,” Yoongi isn’t sure what to do. He can’t even see this. He raises a hand awkwardly, “H-Hello to you too, Ocean Spirit. I’m Seokjin-hyung’s friend. Nice to meet one of his, um, spirit friends.” Seokjin bursts into laughter beside him.

“What? Did I say or do something wrong?” Yoongi half panics, putting his hand down right away.

“Nothing and no, no,” Seokjin shakes his head and then turns to the boatman who has been patiently waiting at the wheel since the wee hours of the morning. “Sir, we’re done for the day!” 

At that, the boat starts running again and they head back to land.

“SURPRISE!!!”

Seokjin stands by the door, speechless. On the other side are the rest of his friends carrying all sorts of food, even some balloons, and party decor. “Guys, I- what is this?”

“It’s your birthday tomorrow, hyung. We need to party of course,” Taehyung grins.

“Surprise. You don’t have to worry about dinner,” Yoongi says from behind him with a smile. Yoongi has been hanging out in his living room the whole afternoon after the fishing trip that morning, just to stall Seokjin from making dinner.

“Oh, Yoongi. You guys.” Seokjin is too flustered to form words, let alone move to let the guys go inside the apartment.

“So, are you letting us in or what?” Jimin asks with a laugh. “The food’s pretty heavy and it’s cold.”

“Right, right. Sorry.” Seokjin snaps out of it and steps aside, opening the door wider for everyone to walk in.

It’s not too extravagant, really. Namjoon and Taehyung quickly hang up some birthday decorations and balloons while Jimin puts all the booze in the fridge, and Hoseok and Yoongi set up the takeout on the table in the living room. There’s fried chicken, pork, japchae, pizza, and side dishes—food enough to feed the whole floor. Everything happens so quickly that all Seokjin gets to do is put some plates and utensils on the table, feeling a little useless in this party preparation. He was clueless about this after all.

After everyone settles, Hoseok and Jimin take the cake from the fridge and light up the candle. They carry the white whipped cream-covered cake to the living room, while the rest start clapping and singing happy birthday. Yoongi on the other hand juggles between singing lousily and taking a video of the entire thing.

As soon as Seokjin notices the singing and his two friends bringing the cake to him, he exclaims, “What! That’s a huge cake! I- This is all too much you guys!” 

Seated on the carpeted floor in front of the table, he watches with a smile on his face as the cake is placed in front of him.

“Make a wish, hyung!” Taehyung says, and everyone waits.

Seokjin looks at each one of them, his neck, ears, and face getting red because of all the attention. This is not the first time they’ve celebrated a birthday together, they’ve done surprises a couple of times too over the years. But this time—this time Yoongi notices that Seokjin stares at each one of them and his eyes shine crystal clear with tears building. This time shouldn’t be any different, but it is. Of course, it is, because it’s Seokjin’s 29th birthday. He croaks out a laugh, obviously trying his best not to let a single tear break out. Jimin comments that he should hurry a bit because he’s heard somebody’s stomach growling and the candles are melting. 

“Okay, okay! I’ll make a wish now sheesh,” Seokjin flails an arm and closes his eyes. His smile remains, but Yoongi immediately notices through the phone screen that it’s not the happiest smile he’s seen. There’s something melancholic about it, but great contentment too. 

After several seconds, Seokjin opens his eyes again and blows out the candle. “Happy birthday, hyung!” Hoseok cheers and the rest follow.

“Thank you, thank you! Time to eat!” Namjoon claps and makes a move to stand, offering to put the cake back in the fridge first but Seokjin stops him.

“It’s okay, I’ll do it. I’ll put it back.” Seokjin gets up and heads to the kitchen, while everyone gets busy eating.

Yoongi’s eyes follow him and he gets up to go to his hyung a couple of minutes later. Seokjin is seen standing by the sink, back turned to anyone who enters the area.

The younger hears a sniffle followed by Seokjin aggressively wiping his face with the sleeve of his sweatshirt. It confirms Yoongi’s suspicions right away. “You okay, hyung?” he asks softly, making his presence known.

“Oh,” The older gives a quick glance and turns back again to hastily wipe his face again. There are obvious tears that don’t stop building and falling. “Y-Yeah! Of course,” Seokjin clears his throat and faces his best friend who opens the fridge to pretend he’s busy and trying to look for something.

Seokjin’s eyes and nose are red, his voice unsteady. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

Yoongi sighs as he shuffles to the counter and starts getting busy with the bunch of ingredients he took from the fridge on a whim. “It’s okay to cry.”

“I didn’t—well fine, maybe I got a little emotional,” Seokjin admits, leaning on the island just a few steps behind Yoongi.

“I’m happy and grateful about all this, I really am. And I just-.” Seokjin pauses and leans a bit more on the kitchen island, “I’m going to miss them, Yoongi. I’m going to miss them so fucking much.”

Yoongi stares at the floor and his grip on the sink tightens. This is the first time Seokjin has mentioned this—or anything remotely about how closer time is for him to go. This is the first time he’s ever expressed how dejected he is about having to go, about how at some point he’s not going to see any of them anymore, or live his life as Kim Seokjinㅡas a son, a friend, a corporate workerㅡany of those. That they aren’t going to be able to see him anymore, that he will cease to exist in this human world. The last time Yoongi has seen Seokjin ever shed tears about this reality that he’s living was when he turned 18—the first time Yoongi found out about everything. Seokjin has lived all 11 years of this without making it known how affected he is, how this hasn’t been the easiest life to live. Yoongi feels like he’s 18 again, having to deal with the horrors of letting his best friend go. Suddenly it’s sinking in that he’ll have to go very soon, that Yoongi will have to continue living a life without Seokjin. He doesn’t even remember his life before Seokjin.

“I know hyung.. I-I know.” Yoongi tries and whispers it as best as he can, not wanting to cause a scene in the middle of the party. He's already forgotten what he planned to do in the kitchen but it doesn't matter anymore. He looks at Seokjin, who has his arms crossed and is trying to hold back more tears from spilling by staring at the ceiling. “They're going to miss you too.”

I’m going to miss you , Yoongi thinks.

Another tear betrays him and rolls down Seokjin’s cheek, quickly looks at the kitchen floor.

It hurts Yoongi to see him like this. Seokjin doesn’t cry often, especially not in front of others. He has always been the person who tries to cheer everyone up, and make them laugh. Even now, he’s trying so hard not to break in front of the people he loves. He’s trying so hard to be strong, despite knowing that the day is coming closer and he’ll have to say goodbye to them soon— if he even gets the chance to bid a proper farewell, that is. 

Yoongi knows that if Seokjin was given the choice, he’d stay. But he carries a huge responsibility which, if neglected, will affect even the people he loves most. His fate hasn’t and will not change. And there’s nothing any of them can do about it. They've accepted this long ago now, even Seokjin's parents.

“Let’s just..." Yoongi pauses. "Let's make the most of the time you have left, yeah?” It hurts, and Yoongi doesn’t even notice that his eyes are all wet too until Seokjin points it out.

“Yoongichi, are you crying too?” Seokjin asks as he wipes away his tears again.

Yoongi doesn't even fake it anymore, fuck it. He feels like a part of him is dying again. He doesn't even know what to say, no words will make any of these better.

“Well.. let’s just say I teared up after poking my eye with a finger that touched chilli and now I have to drop the idea of cooking something,” Seokjin says with a smile now. 

Yoongi chuckles at that and sniffles. “Yeah, whatever. You go eat now.” He starts putting the ingredients out of the plastic and rinses them under running water.

“Let me help you,” Seokjin takes a few steps closer to Yoongi, trying to figure out what Yoongi is going to do.

“Just relax and eat back there, hyung. I can handle this.” Yoongi rumbles and starts chopping the ingredients, the chilli first.

“What's this supposed to be?”

“Gambas. Learned it on YouTube.” Yoongi chops some more and moves swiftly to grab a pan.

“What can I help you with?” Seokjin lights up at the mention of the dish and asks, hoping that he could spend more time in the kitchen to rid of the obvious tears the rest of the guys would pester him about.

"On me, hyung. Just go back to the living room and eat." 

“Aww, Yoongichi,” Seokjin smiles this time.

“Besi—”

“What’s taking you guys so long?”

They turn to see Jimin walking into the kitchen, pizza in hand. “There’s still food but—woah, hyung, did you cry?” He stops in his tracks with a little shock on his face, seeing Seokjin's that was all puffy and tears drying on his skin.

“ No , no, it’s the chilli.” Seokjin is quick to deny, pointing at the pan vaguely and the chopped chillies. Yoongi scoffs beside him as he chops butter and tosses it into the heated pan.

Jimin shoves the last piece of his pepperoni pizza and glides towards Seokjin, taking a closer look at his face. “You did.”

“Did not!” Seokjin screeches, turning away from the younger immediately. Not two seconds later though, a pair of arms are already wrapped around him in a soft and gentle hug. It catches him off guard. “I’m fine , Jimin.” Seokjin tries.

“It’s gonna be okay, hyung,” Jimin mumbles onto Seokjin’s shoulder and tightens his hug. He doesn’t say anything more. Yoongi then turns to look at the two as he tosses the shrimp on the pan and he does a double-take.

Yoongi witnesses something he’s never seen before in all his years with Seokjin. He blinks twice to make sure he’s not just seeing things. Barely able to lift the pair of tongs in his hands to point at him, he hesitates, “H-Hyung, you’re…”

Catching the astonishment in Yoongi’s voice, Jimin raises his head from the older’s shoulder and his eyes widen. He lets go of Seokjin and takes a step back, gasping.

“What?” Confusion is painted on Seokjin’s face, seeing his two friends dumbstruck. “What’s wrong? Is there something on my face?”

“You’re- You’re glowing, hyung,” Yoongi nearly whispers, unable to believe his own words.

“Wow, Yoongichi.” His ears get a little redder, as well as his cheeks. “I-I know I’m good-looking, but you didn’t have to say it like—”

“No, you’re glowing.”

“Literally,” Jimin adds, staring at the older with his mouth open.

Seokjin dubiously stares at Yoongi and Jimin and raises his arms to see that his skin is just as they said, glowing . It’s not figurative in any way, Seokjin has always been on the paler side with bright skin that glows under specific lighting, but this one—this one is not normal. It’s as if he’s a fluorescent lamp that’s switched on or a firefly in the dark night. 

“You have powers?” Jimin whispers so that the other guys busy on the other side don’t hear it or notice the commotion in the kitchen.

“Is this- Is this the first time something like this has happened?” Yoongi steps forward, not knowing what to do with his arms - not quite sure if it’s alright to touch Seokjin’s skin. 

“I don’t…” Seokjin trails off and thinks for a heartbeat. “Oh. N-No. Something like this happened a few days ago. I brushed it off thinking I was too wasted that I looked like a lightbulb.”

“ Wow,” is all Yoongi manages. He’s stunned. If there’s anything physical that would confirm that Seokjin is the Moon, this is basically it. Everything somewhat felt like an illusion, something Yoongi will just have to assume and imagine for the rest of his life when and even after Seokjin does become the Moon. In time. 

“This is.. this is incredible.. How do you do that?” Jimin asks in awe. His gaze has been stuck on Seokjin since he let go of him.

Seokjin shrugs and shakes his head. “I don’t know. I-I don’t even know how to turn this off. I’ll just…” He fumbles and points to the bathroom door. “I’ll just go wash my face maybe. Worked last time.”

Yoongi and Jimin’s eyes follow him as his feet slide across the kitchen floor and to the bathroom that was thankfully in the corner, away from the view of Hoseok, Namjoon, and Taehyung. 

“Wow, I guess he really is the Moon,” Jimin mutters to himself.

Yoongi’s drifting thoughts get disturbed when he hears the sizzle of the Gambas he was in the middle of cooking, rushing back to the stove and stir fry the rest of the dish before turning off the fire.

“Cheers!”

The night goes by quickly by then, just as time always does. Much of the six of them eating and drinking to their heart's content, reminiscing memories from their time in university, Yoongi and Seokjin also share some anecdotes from their childhood. 

When the clock strikes midnight, Yoongi is sitting beside Seokjin. “Happy birthday, hyung,” he says with a soft smile. 

Seokjin returns the smile, “Always the first, huh.”

Yoongi chuckles, “‘s like you didn’t start this yourself. I’m just following tradition.”

Seokjin doesn’t laugh at that, looking at his lap and then back at Yoongi. He smiles again before he takes Yoongi’s hand to squeeze it hard. “Happy birthday, Yoongichi.”

Yoongi laughs shortly, thinking about how Seokjin always likes to be the first with greetings. He has done it way too many times in the last decade, or two decades (Yoongi did not realise how long life goes when you’re nearing your 30’s). Seokjin is not the most competitive person, at least not like Jimin, but he likes to act like there’s competition with silly things like who gets to greet people first.

“Hyung, my birthday’s in three m—”

Seokjin still doesn’t laugh. He squeezes Yoongi’s hand a little tighter with the same smile not falling. The same genuine smile Yoongi has come to know and memorise growing up. If he was a little bit more skilled at drawing, he probably could sketch it.

Yoongi realises. Yoongi remembers what he had been dreading for the past 11 years. His body suddenly runs cold and he stares at Seokjin’s hand that hasn’t let his go, the older squeezing his hand a few more times.

Why does Yoongi need to do this all over again on Seokjin’s birthday? Why can’t he just keep celebrating Seokjin’s birthday? Why does he always have to feel like a part of him is being stripped away with each birthday that’s passing? They should be celebrating. They should be happy that he’s still here in this very moment. Yet, he wants to run away again like he did when he was 17. He knew he would have to face this eventually. 

“When are you leaving?” Yoongi asks in the softest volume he could while Seokjin could hear him. His voice shakes, but Seokjin doesn’t comment on it.

Seokjin audibly sighs, “In a few months, give or take. I don’t know the exact date, but I can feel it coming closer.”

Yoongi slowly nods. Well, he guesses that’s it. Here comes growing up and watching your bestest friend leave the world like some superhero. Seokjin is a superhero to him.

But superhero movies don’t end sadly, do they? Do superheroes need to leave their universes to save everybody else? Seokjin has not done anything wrong as a human being, why does he need to still do this? Why can’t Yoongi be the one to go instead? Why can’t Seokjin live his life to the fullest instead? It’s been 11 years, why does Yoongi still have so many unanswered questions? 

“I’m not entirely leaving, Yoongi-ya. You can still come and see me,” Seokjin whispers this time.

Yoongi nods faster and with more conviction, trying to believe his next words like saying is to believe. “I’m fine.” He forces a smile, trying to reassure his best friend.

“Hey, it’s past 12!” Taehyung announces and then runs over to where he finds Seokjin seated to give him a big and tight hug. “Happy birthday, Jin hyung!” The other three do the same, crowding around Seokjin, cheering and jumping. Jimin and Namjoon pinch his cheeks like a child while Hoseok enthusiastically sings happy birthday again.

It’s a heartwarming scene to watch, just Yoongi’s greatest friends showering their eldest hyung with so much love. Yoongi can’t help but smile to himself for a moment. While the others don’t notice, Yoongi once again sees the faint glow on Seokjin’s skin. 

Yoongi has just stepped out of the shower the following morning when his phone rings. He picks it up on the third ring as he dries his damp hair.

“Morning, birthday boy.” Yoongi croaks out.

“Yoongichiii.” Seokjin’s voice is not faring any better, like he really had just gotten out of bed with hair strands sticking out. Yoongi can imagine.

“Seokjin-hyuung,” Yoongi mimics him in a monotone before switching to the loudspeaker so he could get dressed. 

Seokjin clears his throat. “The seaweed soup is good, thank you~” He singsongs.

Yoongi smiles as he puts up his pants. “It’s nothing. Happy birthday~” 

Yoongi had taken it to himself to cook Seokjin’s birthday seaweed soup this year before the older even requested, getting up with only about three hours of sleep from a long day to cook and drop it off at Seokjin’s apartment. He had gone in before Seokjin even got up, leaving the entire pot on the table with a note reading Happy birthday, hyung. Eat up.

“What do you mean it’s nothing, it’s seaweed soup! That’s still magically warm in this winter!” Seokjin exclaims from the other end of the line. Yoongi can hear the clinking of some utensils and probably a bowl. “So anyway, got any plans today?” Yoongi can hear Seokjin taking another sip of the soup and moaning obnoxiously on the other line. He’s so dramatic about his food, it still does put a smile on Yoongi’s face even when he can’t see it.

“I took the whole week off, remember?” Yoongi slots an arm through the armhole of his plain white shirt.

“Right. Come with me today then.” Seokjin slurps on his bowl again.

“Are you not going home to your parents?” Yoongi recalls his parents moving to Daegu surprisingly, where Yoongi’s hometown was before moving to Seoul.

“Yeah,” Seokjin pauses to swallow his food, “I’m picking up some stuff at the market first, for mom and dad.” 

“Sure,” Yoongi says shortly and picks up his parka hanging from his bedroom door to go straight to Seokjin’s apartment.

About an hour and a half later, Seokjin and Yoongi find themselves carrying a number of plastic bags, some filled with fruits and veggies, some with pastries and snacks. Seokjin also decided to buy new coats and scarves for his parents with the winter in South Korea this year not letting up. 

“That’s probably enough, right?” Seokjin raises both of his hands full of plastic bags from just the items they bought.

Yoongi glances at the two more bags he’s holding himself, “Yeah. I don’t think we can carry more stuff going to their place.”

Only a minute down the street passes before another shop catches Seokjin’s eye. It's got different types of bags displayed on the racks, along with home decor. On the table is an array of bracelets, necklaces, earrings, and other interesting quirks.

“Yoongi-ya,” Seokjin calls. “Can we take a last stop here? I might find something for mom.”

Yoongi stops in his tracks and follows along. “We got time, yeah.”

They enter the shop, Seokjin taking a closer look at the bags, asking for Yoongi’s opinion every once in a while. The lady watching the store stands right behind them, ready to assist if needed. When Seokjin narrows his choices to two, a simple baby pink handbag with a ribbon and an elegant black leather bag, Yoongi lets him be and moves around the shop to take a look at other items. He makes a stop in front of the table, browsing the smaller accessories laid out. He calls for Seokjin’s attention after a minute, letting him know that he’ll be in the next-door store to window shop.

Seokjin follows him after a couple more minutes, standing right beside Yoongi in the middle of a pants aisle. 

“All good?” Yoongi notices the older beside him and asks.

“Yeah,” Seokjin says shortly with a smile, digging his hand in the pocket of his coat and picking up a tiny navy blue velvet pouch and handing it over to the younger. “For you, Yoongichi.” 

“What?”

“I got you a little gift!” He takes Yoongi’s hand and places the pouch, and turns right away to head out of the shop. “It has a gift receipt in case you don’t like it.”

Yoongi laughs, sprinting to catch up with Seokjin. “It’s your birthday, you shouldn’t need to get me anything.”

“Eh, ‘s not a big deal.”

There are two items inside the pouch—a piece of paper (Yoongi assumes it’s the receipt.) and a round solid object. Yoongi pulls out the latter from the pouch. It’s a bracelet with a thin, navy blue string, the same shade as the pouch, and a pretty charm right in the middle–a moon . His footsteps begin to slow down. “A moon bracelet?”

Seokjin picks up right away and slows down, peeking over at the accessory in Yoongi’s palm. “Pretty, isn’t it.”

“Yeah.”

“Well, of course, the real Moon will always be prettier,” Seokjin says with a contented laugh, to which Yoongi snorts, his smile growing bigger with each passing second.

“I’m not gonna beat around the bush—” Seokjin clears his throat. “I’ll eventually not be here physically like, in this form and everything. I thought if I got you something with the moon before I go you’ll always remember me. Like, I’m always beside you.”

Yoongi’s steps completely stop. He stares at Seokjin’s peaceful expression and then at the bracelet. Of course, it had to be about that. Of course, Seokjin will get him a gift in advance, and greet him in advance. Do everything in advance. This feels pretty cruel to Yoongi but he thinks he can’t just keep wallowing in this truth he’s already facing. 

“I’ll have to be sick to forget you, hyung.”

Seokjin laughs softly, the best laugh he could muster at this point. “Guess you can’t get rid of me then.”

And then a heartbeat passes as they take slow steps to the parking lot. Seokjin breaks the silence again. “That doesn’t make sense, does it?” 

“Which one?” Yoongi stops at the parked grey 2018 Hyundai Accent, clicking on his car key to unlock the backseat. He starts loading the plastic bags. 

“You know, me not being here but also always being here?” Seokjin opens the other side of the backseat and loads the bags he too was carrying.

Yoongi closes the door and rests his arm on the roof of the car, “If anything, it’s fucking cheesy,” he teases with a smile on his face, and Seokjin laughs. “I get it though. But like, nothing made sense, to begin with.”

*****

“I have around two weeks left.”

“Oh,” Yoongi says.

Seokjin came over to his apartment that Friday the second to the last week of February after they agreed to have dinner. Seokjin doesn’t prolong it before he lets Yoongi know about his ticking hourglass.

Having already known this, and accepted (Questionable) this for the past 11 years, Yoongi does his best to stay calm and nod in understanding. He’s prepared for this, at least he convinces himself. “Two weeks, huh? So that’s on…?”

Yoongi waits for an answer, staring at Seokjin only for the older to look up at him with unexplainable sadness in his eyes. 

“ Oh .” Yoongi realises. Perhaps it just never occurred to him that his best friend, the person who means the most to him in the whole universe, will be leaving on his birthday .

Seokjin sighs and croaks out in disappointment, “This is just—this really fucking sucks, Yoongi. I hate this so much, I wish, I wish I could change the day. I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.”

“Hey, it’s not your fault, hyung. It’s going to be okay. We’ll be okay.”

They’ll be okay, Yoongi said.

*****

Time flies when you’re having fun.

That’s what people say at least. But Yoongi thinks time just flies. Just that. Because, well, that’s exactly what happens. Time flies. It doesn’t matter if it flies by quickly or slowly. It doesn’t matter if he’s having fun or not. It doesn’t matter if it’s two weeks or 11 fucking years. Time flies nevertheless.

And before he notices it, 11 years do really pass.

“Happy birthday, Yoongichi!” Seokjin exclaims as soon as Yoongi opens the door. The former has been knocking endlessly so early that morning. Yoongi doesn’t understand why the older can’t just get in like all the other times he welcomed himself into Yoongi’s apartment unannounced.

Hair still messy with strands peering out left and right, Yoongi scratches his head, barely able to open his eyes and yet, he can’t help but crack a smile. “Thanks, hyung. You’re a day early though.”

“A day early, three months early, who cares anymore?” He steps inside and immediately makes himself comfortable on Yoongi’s leather couch. “So,” he breathes out, “What do you want to do today?”

“I have work,” Yoongi deadpans as he heads to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee.

“You’re working? The day before your birthday?” Seokjin turns his head quickly to follow Yoongi’s busy body.

Yoongi dodges the question instead, “Have you eaten, hyung?”

“I had some cereal,” Seokjin replies immediately, eyes following Yoongi until he makes his way back to the couch. “Back to what I was saying. What do you really wanna do? I’m free like an unemployed person—I mean technically I have been for a bit now.”

“You’ve been free for, like, two weeks.” Yoongi sits down and takes a sip from his mug.

After finding out when he’d have to leave and telling Yoongi about it, Seokjin had since then been wrapping things up. He filed for an immediate resignation at the university library. Then he told the owner of the apartment that he’ll be moving out in a month. Seokjin had started bringing some of his things back home to his parents, some left in Yoongi’s place, and some still in his own until he needs to really go.

Seokjin has been avoiding the whole thing from causing a commotion, not making much of a deal of it. As heartbreaking as it is for him to leave Namjoon, Hoseok, and Taehyung clueless about his departure, he thinks it’s for the best. He can remain a memory to them. A happy memory.

Nights during those two weeks were spent with him tailing around Yoongi, watching a movie or eating together, much like how they were back in college, sans the school work of course. Yoongi, on the other hand, continued taking photos and videos when he can. Seokjin still doesn’t know about this entire thing. He doesn’t have to anyway.

“Come on. Yoongichi!” Seokjin whines, attempting to convince him again. “You took a whole week off last December. Surely you can take one or two days off this time?”

“That’s because—” It’s because it was Seokjin’s birthday week. Of course, he had to go celebrate with him. “I filed those in advance.” 

“Can’t you take a quick break? Come on, we can go have fun somewhere, or do something you’ve always wanted to do.” Seokjin is sprawled across Yoongi’s couch now, whining like a child to convince Yoongi to take some time off.

“I don’t, I don’t really know what I wanna do.” Yoongi admits. He hasn’t even had the time to think of this, to think of anything else but to work on autopilot while doom’s day, the day Seokjin was to go, was looming around his head. Nothing else has really preoccupied Yoongi’s head as of recent apart from work and Seokjin.

“Then—then let’s at least just have fun around here? Not worry about work?” Seokjin is practically begging.

Yoongi sips a bit more of his coffee and nods. “Sure. I’ll try to leave earlier from work if it’s not busy.” He gets up but Seokjin grabs his arm right away.

Frustrated, the older shuts his eyes before deciding to convince his best friend one more time. “I really didn’t wanna use this but,” he heaves a sigh. Yoongi looks back at Seokjin right away when he feels the grip on his forearm gets tighter.

“I’ve got around 40 hours left, Yoongi. And I want to spend most of it with the most impor—w-with my best friend.”

Yoongi stares at him. Forty hours? What? Already? When Seokjin looks up to meet his eyes, Yoongi feels his heart beating out of his chest, can feel too much, hear too much. He stares for a minute too long, thinking about how it has really come to this moment where he’s truly rushing to spend every second, minute, and hour with his best friend. Now full of worries that time is not going to wait for them. That this is not Seokjin’s 18th birthday anymore. Seokjin is 29 and he is about to leave. For good.

“Okay.”

The first thing they do is visit a nearby cafe that they used to go to occasionally when they were in university on days they had extra cash to spare. Yoongi tells Seokjin that they can eat in some other place within their usual budget, but the latter ignores him.

“You’ve always loved the pasta here.”

When they’re halfway through their meals, Seokjin asks with mouth full, “So where we going next?” 

Yoongi looks up and sees just what he had expected. The sight of Seokjin chewing with both cheeks stuffed with steak. It’s the spitting image of a baby hamster with a sunflower seed. Yoongi watches him for a bit and smiles. 

“I don’t know. Guess I’ll have to leave it up to the birthday planner.”

“Wanna take a walk after?” Seokjin sips on his sparkling water.

“Yeah, sure.”

One thing Yoongi had always admired Seokjin for was his spontaneity, and his lack of planning things beforehand. He has always lived his life as it goes, like water. Something Yoongi would not have had the balls for if he had to be in the same position the latter was.

They manage to accomplish a lot in a day despite Yoongi being really indecisive about where he wants to go. They walk around after having a meal, passing by different shops along the way. The weather almost never gets any warmer except from the bit of sunlight washing over them in the direction that they’re walking. Yoongi is just relieved that he chose to wear his black trench coat over his long-sleeved striped shirt. Seokjin, on the other hand, is wearing his oversized denim coat over a thick black hoodie.

“Oh look!” Seokjin suddenly exclaims as their walk slows down, making Yoongi look up at where he’s pointing. “A drawing cafe!”

They both stop in front of the shop window, the cafe concept piquing their interest, and all the more catching their attention when they see the poster read Opening Week Discount! .

Seokjin nudges his best friend’s elbow. “Yoongi, they serve drinks and food while we draw stuff. Sounds like a good deal. Should we try?”

“We just ate.”

“And what about it?”

That makes Yoongi smile right away. “—and yeah, whatever. Let’s go.”

Just when everything’s set with drinks and food served, paintbrushes and all sorts of painting tools placed on a small table beside them, Yoongi stares at the blank canvas. He has no clue what to even paint. He has watched his mom paint a lot of times growing up, but he hasn’t touched the paintbrush in years. The last time he even picked up a paintbrush wasn’t for leisure painting, it was for some art class that forced him and his classmates to submit some kind of artwork with watercolour paint as a medium. Shit’s not even the same as this one. 

“So now what.”

Yoongi looks to his side and sees that Seokjin is mirroring his exact expression, face blank with no idea whatsoever what to put on the canvas. Yoongi laughs at the realisation that they had immediately agreed to go to an art cafe with no vision of what to even make. 

The two start to paint anyway after a couple of minutes that pass with their drinks getting cold and hands getting busy. Yoongi looks over to Seokjin at some point to see how he’s doing. He notices the older holding a bigger paintbrush, making big strides and strokes across the blank canvas like he’s done this a billion times in the past. Seokjin doesn’t really have experience with painting, but it’s endearing how he seems so sure with his strokes, and that he’s just having fun no matter what the outcome will look like. That’s how Yoongi finds himself quickly taking out his phone to record a quick video of his best friend at work, snapping a few photos as well.

An extra serving of cookies and a slice of cake, over a dozen brush strokes on the canvas and a few on their arms later, Yoongi and Seokjin finish their artwork. They had been consistently working for the past two and a half hours, with very short breaks in between. Few words were exchanged in between but for the majority of it, they were working in silence. Something that Yoongi and Seokjin found comfort in the presence of each other. 

“Hyung, that’s really cute,” Yoongi says in amusement as Seokjin adds the last finishing touch to his painting—a simple yet easily recognizable flying bird. The top half is painted orange, while the bottom has two layers, white and blue, with brown boats and some black touches over the blue paint. “You’re good.”

“Ah, what can I say, Yoongichi…” He puts the paintbrush back in the cup of water and then stretches his arms. “I’m a genius. Seokjinius .” 

Yoongi shakes his head and laughs, “Sure.”

Seokjin bursts into his usual high-pitched laughter, “You better bring this one every time you go fishing. I’ve blessed it with my charm. A lucky charm might I call it.”

Yoongi isn’t even entirely sure if he’d ever go fishing on his own after Seokjin leaves. What is the point of going? But he doesn’t mention any of it. He doesn’t want to think about it either. 

“You think the fish will sense that and take the bait leading to their impending doom?” 

“Hey! Don’t put it that way!”

Yoongi laughs as he starts cleaning up the brushes, “Fine. I’ll test your fish charm next time.” He immediately notices one very tiny spot he left unpainted and clicks his tongue, picking up one of the brushes that he just started cleaning and proceeding to fill that one in.

Seokjin immediately stands to look closer at Yoongi’s work, “You really are quite the artist, huh.”

Yoongi’s laughter turns shy right away with the attention put onto something he’s making. “I just—I don’t know, painted away.” On his canvas is a simple gradient, from white to grey to black, colours blending in with just the right amount of texture. Abstract painting at its finest.

“It’s beautiful.” Seokjin stares at the painting, eyes wide. “It’s like… It’s like milk being poured over black coffee.”

“That’s a very interesting interpretation,” Yoongi nods with a grin on his face, inspecting the painting himself. The way Seokjin’s trail of thoughts and the way he makes sense of the world has always fascinated Yoongi. As lame as his reaction might usually be, Yoongi does think Seokjin can take that Seokjinius title any day. Screw it if he sounds biased.

“What can I say,” Seokjin rests his hands on his hips, getting comfortable in his position. “Birds of the same feather flock together.”

They step out of the cafe a few minutes later, carrying huge bags that contain their paintings. They decide to head back to Seokjin’s car, walking past the rows of now-familiar stores. 

“It’s still early,” Seokjin kicks a stone he sees on his side. “Wanna drop by the park before we go home? Take a short walk or something?” Yoongi picks up a pebble from the pavement and throws it to the nearby light pole. “Sure, hyung. I’d love that.”

Yoongi and Seokjin find themselves walking side by side along the trail at Yeouido Hangang Park. While the park is usually crowded especially on weekends with a lot of families having a picnic or taking a breather from the hustling and bustling of Seoul, today must have been a lucky one for the two. A few people are sitting around the grass while others are biking in various directions. They then settle on a nearby bench to sit and have a view of the rest of the park. Everything is so slow-paced and quiet in this kind of spot, the orange skies painting a more serene picture. Seokjin smiles.

“Joon has to come here more often with his bike,” Seokjin says with a sigh, curtly nodding to a cyclist passing by. 

“Doesn’t he already come here on his day offs?” Yoongi watches a couple of children playing catch with one of those colourful sucker sticky balls. 

“He rarely comes here now. You know, work and stuff.”

“Ah. Life,” Yoongi mutters.

“Come to think of it,” Seokjin starts and shifts on the bench, “I don’t remember the last time we visited a park to do particularly nothing.”

Yoongi cracks a smile, “We rarely had time to do nothing.”

“But we’re here now, aren’t we?” 

Seokjin looks up and scrunches his nose at the direct sunlight on his face. “Yeah.”

They continue to stroll in comfortable silence, simply taking in their peaceful surroundings. Yoongi doesn’t fail to notice the way their shoes would make a sound along the pavement, how his eyes feel relaxed for once with all the plants and trees surrounding them, how the cold wind hits their faces and messes up their hair, how the colour of the sky turns from blue to a blend of orange and yellow.

“I get why Joon makes time to come here,” Seokjin says as they briefly make a stop to take some pictures of the sky that’s now gradually getting darker in various hues. 

“Yeah?” Yoongi also snaps a photo of the sky himself. Then he takes a video, too, moving slowly from right to left, the camera showing Seokjin as part of the footage as well.

“It’s the little stuff like these,” Seokjin says with a smile, still staring far ahead. Still watching the sky. Yoongi turns back to the sky, still recording while his best friend continues thinking out loud. “All of this,” he breathes, “`s you know, part of life. Little things like these we take for granted. Everything’s beautiful.”

“That’s something Namjoonie would say,” Yoongi keeps his phone back in his pocket and Seokjin shakes his head with a tiny laugh, breaking him out of his loud thoughts. “Guess you’re right though, about life.”

A beat passes.

There’s something about the way Seokjin inhales and exhales, full of tranquillity. “It’s all been so good.”

The sun has already set by the time they get home, and the two of them climb up the stairs, carrying their big canvases, and head straight to Yoongi’s unit.

The moment Yoongi opens the door and turns the light on, the first thing that he registers is a group of loud, sloppy singing.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!”

Seokjin who’s standing behind him gets a lot more startled, jumping right at the first note and almost hitting his head on the door. The rest of their friends are standing in the living room, Taehyung in the middle while holding a nicely decorated cake.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOONGI-HYUNG, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!”

Yoongi walks into his apartment with a smile painted on his face. “It’s not my birthday yet~”

“Who cares! It will be in like,” Hobi glances at the wall clock and counts on his fingers, “Four hours.”

“Hyung, hurry, make a wish and blow the candle!” Taehyung extends his arms, moving the cake closer to the older.

Yoongi stares at the cake, thinking a little bit hard about what wish he should make. He begins to wonder if anything he had wished for on his previous birthdays has even come true. And then just like a bulb light, a thought comes up in his head. He clasps his hands together and closes his eyes, speaking his wish in mind. He repeats the wish three times, immediately blowing the candle on his cake. 

Yoongi’s shooting his shot, hoping that this birthday wish actually works this time, even just this time. 

“Happy birthday Yoongi-hyung!” Namjoon yells, and the rest mimics him with additional howls and claps.

“Thank you, guys. Thank you,” Yoongi says as Taehyung places the cake on the dining table. “I wanna know though- how the fuck did you all get in here?”

“Seokjin-hyung sent me your code,” Jimin points to Yoongi’s best friend, the culprit and enabler of the entire surprise. Seokjin is standing behind Yoongi and watching all of them the whole time with a laugh.

Yoongi turns to Seokjin. “You gave him my door code? You were behind this too, hyung?”

“Happy birthday!” The older gives a shy smile as he walks towards Yoongi and throws an arm around him. Yoongi is out of words, but he can’t deny either that his heart is full.

“Alright. Let’s eat!” Jimin announces and they all head straight to the dining table where all the celebratory foods are laid out.

“Forget my fucking door code, Jimin!” Yoongi calls out as he and Seokjin follow right behind the rest of them.

“I’ll try but I can’t promise!” 

The night passes quickly with everyone leaving a little earlier as Yoongi’s birthday ended up falling on a weekday, with each of them having to leave for work the following morning. Though they did show up and stayed for a bit to welcome Yoongi’s birthday at midnight, they wrap up earlier than they usually would. Yoongi closes the door after seeing the guys out, immediately going back to the dining area. He sits across Seokjin, who’s scooping the last bit of ice cream from the bowl in front of him. 

“So, did our birthday boy enjoy the day?” Seokjin asks, flashing a smile and then shoving a spoonful of ice cream into his mouth.

“Of course, why wouldn’t I? I took a day off, ate a lot , celebrated with the guys just now, spent the whole day out with you.” Yoongi enumerates and gestures vaguely.

There’s a pause, Seokjin shoving the last of the cream from the bowl into his mouth with an unreadable expression. “Are you happy?”

Yoongi is taken aback briefly but nods slowly with a small smile, “Yeah.”

Seokjin returns the small smile, getting up from his seat with the empty bowl. “That’s good to know. I’m glad then.”

The atmosphere changes right away—something about the air feeling much heavier now. Yoongi realises that they’re back to the dawning reality.

An absurd reality, which they’ve come to accept. A reality they’ve had to embrace for the past 11 years. 

Yoongi tries to mask the immediate melancholic feeling that’s now overlapping with the joy he’s felt for the entire day. “It’s thanks to you, hyung,” Yoongi stands from his seat, following Seokjin to the kitchen.

Seokjin doesn’t respond, but he goes straight to the clothes hanger where his coat was left hanging. He takes his coat and presses his lips to a smile. They both head to the door slowly. Silently.

Yoongi realises something that has been shoved to the back of their minds for the last few years to months, counting down the days without the knowledge of some other important people in not only Seokjin’s life but Yoongi’s too. Yoongi frowns at the fact that he had only now remembered.

“Hyung.” 

“Hm?” Seokjin turns to look at Yoongi as he wears his coat.

“You didn’t tell them that you’re leaving.”

“I-” Seokjin’s falls and looks down, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t know what to say or how to even tell them. I don’t know how to explain everything to them anymore. If I did make something up all of a sudden, I’m pretty sure they’re going to throw a million questions at me and you know, that’s overwhelming.” 

Yoongi bites his lip and nods slowly in understanding. “Okay, I’ll- I don’t know, come up with something. Maybe tell them you had to migrate for work or grad school.”

Seokjin is silent as he contemplates Yoongi’s suggestion. He sighs eventually and tugs at his coat, “No. I’ll just—I’ll send a message in our group chat before I go. I don’t want to add to the burden you’re carrying, Yoongi. It’s not even supposed to be your job to tell them.”

“It’s fine, I can talk to th—”

“No, it’s okay.”

A beat passes with both of them standing by the door of Yoongi’s apartment.

Seokjin takes a deep breath, “So uh...” He presses his lips into a forced smile, avoiding any gaze on Yoongi’s face.

“So…” Yoongi starts but trails off, resorting to staring at the blank wall to his right. Silence once again encompasses them. They’re taking their time even when they practically don’t have it anymore.

“I guess this is it.” It’s Seokjin who speaks up first. Yoongi looks up and his heart starts racing at the sight of Seokjin now looking directly at his face instead of the apartment floor.

The latter heaves a sigh and nods slowly as he processes the 11 years that he’d spent preparing for this very day. All he manages to do is to return the forced smile, mirroring Seokjin. “I-I guess so.” He isn’t really sure what to do. How do you even say goodbye to your best friend knowing you aren’t seeing them ever again—not even with a plane ride? How the fuck do you even properly prepare for a time in your life where you have to physically treat your bestest friend as if they’re dead?

He had 11 years to think of how he’d be ready for such day to come, yet Yoongi doesn’t even have time to react when Seokjin reaches out to pull him into a tight hug. He does reciprocate, even when his mind is running on a never-ending turning wheel, like it’s running on an engine. Yoongi does everything he can to savour and commit to memory the warmth that his entire body is greeted by. In that moment, he does his best to keep his breathing steady, does his best to keep his eyes from blinking the first tear.

No, he has accepted it. Sure he made an absurd birthday wish about Seokjin staying, but that’s about it—a wish. He knows what’s going to happen. He’s not going to cry anymore. He can’t cry anymore, he’s had enough of that. They stay in their spot for a full minute, Yoongi whispering to Seokjin that they have to go. Seokjin doesn’t respond but tightens his hold on the latter. When they break out of the hug, Yoongi looks up only to see Seokjin turning around right away and sniffing. When he eventually faces Yoongi again, with eyes red and lips trembling, he smiles and nods.

Seokjin lets out a deep breath and schools a calm expression, trying to hide away the heavy emotions that are crystal clear to Yoongi. Yoongi can’t help but purse his lips, feeling his throat tighten even more than it did earlier. No , he thinks to himself, I’m not going to cry. God, I’ve pictured this exact scene way too many fucking times. 

“You still going to work tomorrow morning, Yoongichi? Or should I say, later?” Seokjin clears his throat and tries to lighten the mood with what was left that he could muster to say.

“Uh, yeah.” Yoongi looks away quickly and scratches the back of his head. “I wasn’t able to take more time off.”

Seokjin nods again understandingly and extends his arm out to pat Yoongi on the shoulder. “You should get some rest then.”

Yoongi slowly mimics him, “You too,” A heartbeat. “What time are you leaving to go to your parents?”

“Early in the morning. I’ll get a few hours of sleep before I hit the road.”

“Okay. Drive safe, hyung.”

“And you,” Seokjin points a finger at his best friend, “You stay safe and healthy always. Don’t overwork. Eat well. Take care of the guys, but before that, take care of yourself first. Got it?”

That puts a smile on Yoongi’s face. “Sure, dad .” They both muster a laugh.

Before Seokjin is able to walk away from his spot, Yoongi reaches for him again. “Hey, hyung,” Yoongi says, “Thanks. Really.”

Seokjin shakes his head with a soft smile, eyes fluttering close for a second. “No. Thank you , Yoongi.”

Yoongi wakes up not to his alarm, but to the endless ringing of his phone. Eyes still shut, he groans and reaches over to his bedside table to find his phone. It takes a few seconds for him to get ahold of it and when he finally does, he clicks to answer the call and puts it over his ear, eyes barely open.

“Hyung!” 

It’s loud and too early for this . Yoongi barely makes a sound to acknowledge the person on the other end of the line, only groaning something incoherent.

“First of all, happy birthday!”

Yoongi hums, recognizing the voice. “Thanks, Jimin. What time—”

“Second of all. I knew Seokjin-hyung left to go to his parents but,” he pauses and then starts whispering directly to the mic of his phone, “He sent this long-ass message to our group chat. I didn’t know he’s leaving leaving?!–”

That jolts Yoongi awake, eyes popping open more than Yoongi thought he ever could. “He what?” Yoongi asks loudly this time, quickly sitting up on his messy bed.

“He sent a message to the group,” Jimin says slowly this time, still keeping his voice as low as possible. “Said he’s sorry for letting us know just now but he’s about to board a plane to the States for a huge opportunity and that he won’t be back any time soon. Obviously bullshit if you ask me, but it seems that the guys bought it. They’re not happy about it though. It’s all so sudden.”

Yoongi sighs. So that’s what Seokjin had come up with as an excuse, “Yeah.”

“You knew about this, hyung? Today’s the day?”

“Unfortunately.” Yoongi sighs at the memory and ruffles his hair.

Jimin audibly says, “Why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve—”

“That was up to hyung to tell you. Not me.” Yoongi says shortly.

“True, but…” There are some sniffling sounds now. Yoongi hates it when the guys cry, especially Jimin. Jimin who always lets others lean on him but doesn’t like to visibly show how hard things get sometimes. “W-We could’ve said a proper goodbye or something? Anything? Not some sort of breakup text. Hyung, this is just mean.”

It’s too early for this , is what Yoongi wants to say. But he knows there’s really no other time to talk about it. He’ll have to address this eventually. “I know, Jimin. I know. And I’m sorry things had to go this way, but it is what it is. Hyung didn’t know how to say it himself either.”

There’s silence on the other end before a defeated sigh is clearly heard. “Yeah, I guess so.”

“Maybe you can video call him or something. It’s early. He’s probably still driving or something. You can reach him.” Yoongi suggests.

“Yeah, I will. Oh, and hyung, it’s past 10. You better get up.” Jimin says before he ends the call.

Yoongi curses under his breath when he looks at his phone again to confirm on the digital clock that it does read as 10:36 AM. That gets Yoongi standing quickly on the bed and scrambling to get moving.

It’s only when Yoongi finally sits down in his secluded studio that he feels like he can breathe again. He had gotten ready in a span of seven minutes and tried to dash to work as fast as he could. It’s only then that he actually gets to read the messages that Jimin was referring to.

He scrolls through the messages in their group chat. After Seokjin’s initial message, which happened to be very straightforward but also apologetic, the guys sent endless questions as expected. Soon, these have been followed by goodbyes. And then—perhaps the most devastating part of it all—hopes to keep in touch and see each other again. 

Seokijn-hyung [09:50]:

i’m really sorry guys

Jimin [09:54]:

hyung :( we’ll miss you!!

Taehyung [09:55]:

i still can’t believe it. but don’t forget about us hyung!!

can you visit in a few years? or can we at least visit you?

Joon [09:55]:

Hey hyung, tell us about the US, yeah?

You know we’ll miss you right? Please send pictures and stuff

And promise you’ll stay safe?? We’re a message away if you need anything

I’m serious

Hobi [09:57]:

:( :(

We’ll see each other again right?

Seokjin doesn’t promise anything. He apologizes again and again and, lastly, says that he has to turn his phone off.

“Yoongi-ya, happy birthday!” a voice distracts Yoongi from reading more devastating messages on the group chat, his head raising to see his work boss peeking through the open door.

“Oh, sir!” he immediately gets up and bows. “Thank you. I’m sorry for being late this morning, I—”

His boss dismisses it with a wave of his hand, letting himself in and leaning on the wall. “Don’t worry about it. Why are you even here? Shouldn’t you be celebrating out or something?”

Yoongi scratches the back of his neck at the attention put on his birthday. “I have some things to finish, sir.”

“Well, at least make sure you have your seaweed soup today.”

Yoongi stills and he blinks at his boss.“You haven’t?” His boss asks with curiosity and care in his tone.

“I-I was in a rush this morning. It’s okay, sir! It doesn’t really matter.” Yoongi shakes his hand, trying his best to dismiss the matter.

“You know what, do yourself a favour. Go home early, treat yourself and your friends to a nice meal, would you? You work hard here in the studio 360 days a year, your birthday only comes once. Yeah? Come on, get yourself something nice for the day.” Yoongi’s boss approaches his seat and pats his shoulder.

Yoongi weakly laughs, “Thanks sir, but that would really depend on what time I get the next v-”

“There’s always tomorrow for that.” With that, his boss starts stepping out of the room and shuts the door softly.

Yoongi smiles (a little too big) and stands to bow as the door shuts. He sits back down and waits for his computer to turn on. In the meantime, he scrolls through his unread messages, sending quick thank yous to friends, colleagues, and acquaintances who sent him greetings early in the morning. And then he sees one that makes him pause to slowly read.

A message from Seokjin.

Seokjin-hyung [06:47]:

yoongichiiii

there’s a bowl of seaweed soup in the fridge. fill yourself up before going to work

happy birthday again!

be safe and healthy :)

Nice. A normal greeting from a normal friend on a perfectly normal day. That totally doesn’t make something in him churn. Totally not. He elects not to reply to it, putting his phone down and instead starts catching up on work, which is undeniably a lot . No urgent deadlines, but still a lot nevertheless. Something that’s not exactly in Yoongi’s favour, but he has been called a workaholic so that might just really be him.

The problem is that focus has totally gone out the window no matter how many times Yoongi has reminded himself to . He’s fine. Nothing whatsoever is distracting him from this normal birthday workday. All he has to do is get through this day, clock out on time as his boss said, go home, get some fried chicken and beer delivered, and then sleep. Like how he usually envisions his birthday to go.

A few hours later while revising a part of this song he’s been working on, Yoongi feels his stomach grumble, reminding himself that he hasn’t taken a break since he sat on the studio chair. Heck, he wasn’t even able to get a cup of coffee after he rushed out the door of his apartment. He presses CTRL+S at least 20 times, making extra, extra sure that it’s saved. There’s no fucking way he’s dealing with lost files and data ever again. That was a traumatic experience. Then, Yoongi heads out for the needed break.

While waiting for the sandwich he ordered, his phone buzzes.

Seokjin-hyung [14:32]:

yoongi

so sorry but i realized i still left some things in your apartment. my parents might come pick them up sometime next week, if you don’t mind

anyway, i’ll be going soon so take care, ok?

make sure you eat your meals on time

Seokjin-hyung [14:33]:

you don’t have to reply. i know you’re busy

Seokjin-hyung [14:34]:

bye yoongi. thanks again for everything :)

Yoongi stares at the last words Seokjin sent. It feels like he’s been slapped with the reality he’s facing. No more running away and avoiding. Suddenly, everything sinks in like the loud and impactful descent of an anchor in the deep waters. Everything he’s been trying to convince himself the whole day? Lies. They’re all lies—

“Roasted chicken sandwich and iced americano for Yoongi!” the server calls and snaps Yoongi out of it for a brief moment. He quickly walks up to the counter and picks up his order, quickly heading back to the office.

The silent elevator ride prompts him to read the messages again. And again. By the time he gets back to his studio, he’s deep in his thoughts and can’t even bring himself to move, staring at his dimmed monitor. There is no way this day is just another perfectly normal birthday-workday. There is no way in this world that his friend is just a normal friend. There is no way that Min Yoongi is fine. 

He just cannot do this.

He takes a deep breath and places his food on an empty space on his table before picking his phone up again to open his chat with Seokjin.

You [14:45]:

hyung, what time are you leaving?

Seokjin surprisingly answers right away, the chat bubble appearing shortly after Yoongi sends the message.

Seokjin-hyung [14:47]:

when the sun sets. why?

Seokjin hyung [14:49]:

yoongi?

“Yoongi-hyung, what on earth is this emergency that you had to borrow my car and I had to take the rest of the day off?” Jimin asks, fastening his seatbelt on the passenger’s seat. “I swear, if you dragged me out for a fake emergency I’m gonna—”

“We’re going to Seokjin-hyung’s parents’,” Yoongi says firmly, starting the car.

“What? Like, now?” Jimin’s eyes widen.

“Daegu.” Yoongi starts driving, foot pressed on the pedal.

“Wait wait wait. We’re going where ? Daegu ? Hyung, that’s a three-hour drive!” Jimin is yelling now.

“You wanted to see hyung, right?” Yoongi uses Jimin’s words from that morning as an excuse, looking straight at the road and not sparing a glance at the younger.

“I- Yeah, I do but- I already talked to him this morning through video call, like you said—”

“Well, let’s see him before he goes. In the flesh.” Yoongi starts speeding up as he gets on the highway.

“Hyung, can you calm down for a second? You’re scaring me.” Yoongi ignores him. “Hyung!”

“What!”

“Just– can you pull over for one second after we get down the highway?!” Jimin’s voice is loud and clear as he points to a spot where they’re able to see a sidewalk..

Yoongi doesn’t respond but he follows as asked and stops the car quite roughly. He rubs his temples, clearly agitated. 

“Please breathe for a second, hyung.”

Yoongi heaves a sigh and slams the wheel. Time is running faster than ever and he cannot waste another second. Jimin grabs at the steering wheel. “Get out of the driver’s seat,” The younger firmly says as he reaches to open the door by Yoongi’s side and then on his own.

“What?” Yoongi is confused and frowning.

Before Yoongi can even react, Jimin appears on his side of the door. “Get out. I’ll drive.” Yoongi does so, too frustrated to even argue.

Yoongi settles on the passenger seat. “Jimin-ah, we don’t have any more fucking time.”

“I’m not letting you drive my car like that .”

“ Park Jimin . We have three hours—probably even less than three to make it. So please, please just fucking drive.”

“I know, hyung. I know,” The car starts moving again. “Don’t worry, we’ll get there on time. Trust me.”

The sky is painted blue and orange with the sun about to set by the time they make it to the Seokjin’s neighbourhood, all thanks to Jimin’s fast and steady driving.

They stop right in front of the Kim residence after Yoongi tries to calmly give Jimin the directions. Yoongi has only been here a couple of times with Seokjin, and he’s just thankful that he still remembers where their house is despite how scattered his brain is at the moment. 

Yoongi knocks on the door while Jimin waits for a few steps behind him. He waits, nervous and scared that Seokjin is no longer there. A moment passes and no one answers. Yoongi knocks again. 

Still no answer.

He turns to Jimin and shakes his head slowly, descending the steps and heading back to the car.

“Hyung, what if–” Jimin quickly follows, trying to stop Yoongi. “What if he’s just somewhere else? We can look around—”

“Look around? Jimin, the sun is about to set. Time’s already up. He’s probably gone. It’s over.” He opens the car door and is about to get back inside. Jimin grabs his arm before he can even get his foot inside. “Hyung,” he says firmly, “we did not just drive three fucking hours for you to give up here.”

“It’s over , Jimin. I’m sorry for wasting your time, if that’s what you wanted to hear—”

“No!” Jimin shouts, jolting Yoongi. “We are not giving up. You know Seokjin-hyung the best. Is there someplace where he could, I don’t know, wait before some mystical thing happens? Did he mention anything? Is there somewhere he could be?”

Yoongi sighs but racks his brain for something, anything . He tries to remember anything Seokjin might have mentioned to him or might have done. “H-He never gave any details on what will happen, Jimin. He didn’t seem to even want me to know anything else.”

“Hmm… Or maybe, there’s some kind of science or spirit on whatever that’s connected to the moon? Think, hyung. You can do this.” Jimin encourages, his expression searching for answers. 

“Something that’s connected to the moon…” Yoongi mutters and frowns, staring at the ground and trying to recall every single thing Seokjin might have said about it or anything he’s read from the things he tried to study in the past 11 years. He tries to remember anything relevant or weird that happened in the years he’s known Seokjin, which is practically all his life. A moment later, he realises that the answer simply lies in the events of the past year. “Water.”

“Water?” Jimin echoes and his eyes glint at the response.

“Water. Th-The moon has this correlation to bodies of water.” He tries to remember if there’s any nearby. “The lake! There’s a nearby lake here!” Yoongi grips the top of the car door.

They get back to the car as fast as they could, the sky reminding them that there’s no time to waste. Jimin follows Yoongi’s instructions, which the latter just hopes is the right way to get to the lake. They drive past a couple of houses and make a turn. Thankfully, they see a body of water on the left side of the road, with Jimin spotting it right away. They also notice a person’s silhouette standing before them.

“Stop the car!” Yoongi yells and Jimin does so abruptly. “Come on,” Yoongi rattles to open the car door. He momentarily realises that he didn’t put back the seatbelt on, but fuck that shit. He has no time to be reprimanded for car safety rules when he’s about to lose his fucking best friend forever.

“Go on, hyung. I’m right behind you.” Jimin says with a smile.

Yoongi jumps out and realises that the walk to where the person stands is still far. He’s about to run when a woman’s voice makes him stop in his tracks.

“Yoongi? Yoongi, is that you?”

He looks up and recognized the lady, beside her is the husband. “Mr. and Mrs. Kim.” 

“Are you here for Seokjin?” she asks with a calm voice. Yoongi notices that her eyes are quite red, obviously still fresh from tears that were shed. Mr. Kim doesn’t look any different. Yoongi realises he has never seen Seokjin’s father cry ever until this very day.

“Y-Yes. Me and Jimin are.” He points to the younger who’s standing behind him. “We’re friends.”

“Oh.” She slowly nods, showing a small and sad smile to both of them.

“Is it too late?” Yoong’s whole body is shaking as he asks the question with a trembling voice.

“N-Not yet, but you should hurry.” Another tear drops down her cheek and she quickly takes a finger to her cheek to wipe it. Her voice shakes as she continues, “H-He’ll be gone any time now.”

Yoongi can feel his eyes watering, seeing the brokenhearted expressions of his best friend’s parents. He nods and makes a run for it.

“Hyung!”

He calls and runs. It feels like his lungs are going to collapse but he runs and runs, all while the colours painting the sky slowly turn into a darker shade of blue.

“Hyung!” Yoongi repeats.

A silhouette moves and turns towards Yoongi’s direction, and with the slightest rays of sunlight left, Yoongi sees a glimpse of his face. 

“Hyung!” He calls again and with a much longer bellow. He’s almost there.

“Yoongi?”

Yoongi almost crashes into Seokjin when he skids to a stop in front of him. Seokjin grabs his arms to support him. Yoongi looks up, panting and taking in his best friend. Seokjin is wearing a simple white shirt and jeans. 

“Yoongi, what- what on earth are you doing here?” Seokjin asks, rubbing Yoongi’s back while the latter coughs and catches his breath.

“Hyung,” Yoongi pants harder. “Don’t go.”

“Yoongi–”

“ Please hyung! Don’t- don’t go anymore. Can’t you just stay?” Yoongi’s tears which he has been holding for the entire day are all pouring now like the current of the lake.

“I can’t, Yoongi. You know this already,” Seokjin tries to look him in the eye but Yoongi rapidly shakes his head, like what happened on Seokjin’s 18th birthday.

“I thought- I thought I’m okay with this, that I was going to be okay with this. I thought I’ve accepted it after 11 fucking years but- but t-today, fuck , I was trying to act like everything’s fine and normal and I- fuck , I can’t do this, hyung!” He’s shaking and almost wailing, still out of breath while his tears continue to flow and spread across his cheeks and down his chin. He has never cried like this in his life.

It’s gotten really dark by now—way too dark even when the sun has just set. Yoongi tries to make out Seokjin’s face in the darkness. It’s only the faintest light from farther light posts surrounding them that makes Yoongi see that the older’s tears have also started to dribble and that his lips are shaking, unable to form any word.

“What am I, what am I supposed to do?” Yoongi loudly sobs now. “What am I supposed to do without you?” His knees fall to the ground, his body shaking so badly that he can’t keep himself upright anymore.

Seokjin quickly follows Yoongi, kneeling down in front of him. “Yoongi. I-I have to go. The world will fall apart if I don’t, we’ve gone over this. I’m sure you’ll do just fine without me.” 

Yoongi uses the energy he has left to hug Seokjin tightly. He gives him the hug that Yoongi has stopped himself from giving the night before. A tight hug that clearly is begging the latter to stay, to not leave anymore. “Don’t leave me please, hyung. Fuck saving the world, we’ll all fucking die eventually! Just stay with us, with me, please, please. I can’t fucking live without—”

“Yoongi.” Seokjin returns the hug, holding him close. He’s clearly about to start breaking into a sob. Yoongi feels like there might be hope as he holds his best friend. There might be hope that this won’t be the last time he’ll see him, hopes that some miracle might happen and that his birthday wish would come true after all—that Seokjin wouldn’t have to go.

But then the ground shakes and then stops. “Was that an earthquake?” He mumbles, still holding on to Seokjin. Yoongi lifts his head only to be met by pitch-black darkness. He retrieves his cellphone from his pocket and turns on the flashlight.

He scans the surroundings of the lake. Seokjin is still in front of him, thankfully. The water beside them, however, seems to gradually lessen, clearly descending into a sudden low tide. They both know that’s not a good sign. “Th-The water—”

“Yoongi,” Seokjin calls his attention. “I’m sorry, I’m really sorry. I have to go now.”

“Hyung,” Yoongi reaches to hug him again. “Hyung, no, no. Please–”

The ground shakes again for a second and then stops just like previously.

“Without the moon, things will only get worse from here on. If I don’t go, the- the world will be worse for you. For the guys, my family and yours. It’s my duty. It’s what’s destined for me, Yoongi.”

Yoongi isn’t usually a crier and when he does cry, it’s usually a bit shedding of tears. But now, he’s breaking down. One that he knows he’s never had before. One he knows he will never experience again. At least not in a long time. He feels like his throat is closing up and his heart is about to burst in pain, the literal depiction of a heartbreak. He’s more than desperate at this moment and he just wants to hold on to every little bit and piece of Seokjin that he could get.

Seokjin gently rubs the back of Yoongi’s head. His voice trembles as he speaks, “Just, just be safe always, yeah? Watch our friends and family for me. Live happily, Yoongichi. There’s so much to life that you’ve yet to see. Go see them for me too.”

Yoongi feels that the most important person to him is going to let go. He only hugs him tighter, the tightest that he could.

“Yoongichi,” Seokjin says with a smile, blinking away his tears. “I won’t be totally gone. I’ll always be watching over you too.”

Streaks of bright white light slowly surround them. “Hyung–”

“Thank you for making my 29 years worth it here; and way more than I could ever ask for. I love you, Yoongi. I always will.”

“H-Hyung, I–!” Yoongi feels him slipping away as the light gets brighter and brighter, seemingly encompassing the whole town, the whole region. It gets too bright that he needs to shield his eyes.

Once the light dies down and disappears, Yoongi opens his eyes and his vision readjusts. He scans his surroundings. The place is no longer pitch black. The lake’s water level is back to normal, the stars are scattered across the sky, and the full moon, and Seokjin–

Seokjin is nowhere to be found.

Just like that, he’s gone.

*****

Yoongi groans at the sound of endless knocks on the door.

“Coming,” he yells out as he gets up from the couch, carrying his can of beer with him. The knocking doesn’t seem to stop. Can’t this person wait? He opens the door and on the other side is Jimin, dressed up as if he’s about to have a night out. “Hey. Why are you here?” he asks and scratches his head. The latter only raises his eyebrows and hands as if expecting Yoongi to say something else. Yoongi, however, seems to be clueless. “What?” he deadpans.

“We’re meeting at Hobi-hyung’s place for dinner? In like, 30 minutes??”

“ Oh . Oh shit, I forgot. Sorry, sorry.” He chants and walks further in his apartment, letting Jimin welcome himself in. He’s in his plain shirt and lounge shorts, just about ready to wind down by watching some stupid-ass reruns on TV. “Could you, uh, maybe just tell them I can’t go?” Yoongi tries as he dumps the can of beer into the bin.

“Hyung.” Jimin’s tone is an obvious no, or Hyung, you promised , or both. Most likely both.

“Okay, fine. Fine. Give me like 10 minutes then.” Yoongi dashes into his bedroom, leaving Jimin to get himself comfortable on the couch.

“Faster! Taehyung’s on standby outside,” Jimin calls out.

After perhaps more than the amount of time he mentioned, Yoongi walks out of his bathroom in a simple shirt, jacket, and jeans. He spots Jimin sitting on his bed, rummaging over something on the side. “What are you doing in here? I’m good. Come on.”

“One second,” Jimin says, crouched as he looks through a box in the corner of the room—a box that Yoongi hasn’t touched since the first time he placed there.

“Jimin, leave those alone. I thought we were in a hurry.”

“Hyung. Have you already looked at the things in this box?” Jimin pauses and when Yoongi doesn’t respond, he continues. “I didn’t know he left you his phone.”

Yoongi stares for a second and grows impatient, closing his eyes for a second and lets out a sigh. He really isn’t in the mood to unpack any of the things Seokjin has left behind around the apartment. In fact, he’s ready to fall back to sleep on his couch on this fine Saturday evening, if not for Jimin showing up unannounced (well, not really unannounced because they did talk about this) and dragging him to some dinner (he did promise to go after missing last month’s catch up). He opens his eyes and answers flatly. “No. And yes, he did. Can we go now?”

Jimin finally stands up and turns to the older. “Hyung, it’s been five months.”

“I know, Jimin. I just-” He shakes his head. “I can’t do this right now. I honestly can’t even fucking look at it, that’s why I hid it there.” It’s true. Yoongi has not looked at anything remotely connected to Seokjin over the last few months. The only thing he has kept close to him is the moon bracelet that he wears every single day. The last present Seokjin had gotten him for his birthday.

Jimin only nods and doesn’t ask any more questions. He reaches Yoongi and rubs a hand on his back. “Okay then. Let’s go.”

“Has he ever contacted you, hyung?”

This again , Yoongi thinks upon hearing Hoseok’s question. The conversation after dinner has somehow led to Seokjin, about how his apartment was a really cool place for them to gather, how he’d be making a joke right at this moment, how he’d be cooking for them, how they miss him. Yoongi totally understands why, of all people, he’s the one being asked about Seokjin’s whereabouts almost every time the rest of them get together. The two of them are the closest after all.

Sadly, he has no answer to their questions. He hasn’t made up anything to say either. He can no longer add to the lie Seokjin made up to cover for the true reason he left. He just feels terrible lying to them.

Yoongi shakes his head, glancing up at his friends while fiddling with the moon bracelet around his wrist. “No. He’s probably busy.”

“Plus the time zone is different,” Jimin jumps in to save face, clearly seeing that Yoongi has been avoiding anything that has to do with Seokjin. “He might be too tired to call or something. We should understand that.”

“Yeah, and who knows, he might have gotten teamed up with workaholics. I just hope his boss isn’t giving him a hard time. It’s hard to survive alone in foreign land.” Namjoon shakes his head. 

“He could at least leave a message,” Taehyung says with a pout. “I miss Seokjin-hyung.”

Yoongi sighs.

“Hey, come on.” Jimin rubs Taehyung’s shoulder and tries to lighten up the mood. “Cheer up everyone! I’m pretty sure Seokjin-hyung still thinks of us, hm? He wouldn’t want us to get too sad about him leaving us, right?” The other guys nod in agreement. Jimin particularly eyes Yoongi for a second before he continues, “Besides, we don’t see each other all the time, and we’re here to celebrate Hobi-hyung’s promotion! He’d want us to laugh and smile and just be happy, right?”

“Jimin’s right.” Namjoon claps his hands together with a smile and sigh. “We shouldn’t be sulking right now.”

“Okay!” Hobi stands up, excited. “I guess it’s time for dessert!”

“Dessert?” Jimin and Taehyung say together, eyes lighting up at the sound of more food.

“We’re not done yet?” Yoongi says jokingly, a little smirk at the corner of his lips as he scans the other guys and the food in front of them.

After getting a few bites of the cake Hoseok brought out for everyone to eat, Yoongi steps out for a while to get some air. It’s gotten colder lately as autumn is fast approaching.

“See that, Taehyungie? The moon?” he hears Jimin’s soft voice from the corner. He turns and sees the two standing close to him with Jimin’s arm thrown over Taehyung’s shoulders. He observes them, who are seemingly in their own world again (the whole group has gotten used to it over the years).

Taehyung gazes at the sky, admiring the view. “Wow.”

“I wanted to show you this because you were a bit sad earlier. Pretty, right?”

“Yeah, the moon–” Taehyung pauses and looks at the latter. “Jimin-ah, you know what they say about this right? Or–”

“Yeah, I know.” Jimin smiles softly his eyes disappearing into crescents as he caresses Taehyung’s shoulder.

“The moon is indeed pretty, Jimin.”

If this were any other moment, Yoongi would have cringed and made howling noises around them, not even three feet from where he’s standing. But their conversation propels him to look up and see the one thing he has consciously tried not to even glance at for the past five months. 

There it is, the full moon in all its glory, glowing and lighting up the sky. It’s beautiful . 

Yoongi, too, knows what it means to tell someone that the moon is pretty, hearing the supposed meaning from the Moon himself many, many years ago. Hearing the actual three words from the Moon right before he became one.